#imagine being too gay to save yourself

[targaryenluvs]

OUR LITTLE DOVE

pairings: dark!lucy gray x fem!reader, dark!coriolanus snow x fem!reader, coriolanus snow x lucy gray

summary: you reunite with your dear songbird after the games, but it seems the capitol has followed her home, and taken an interest in the two of you. but it seems lucy gray is willing to share you with a certain peacekeeper, even if you aren’t.

warnings: crazy lucy n corio conspiring like evil doers, manipulation, chasing, primal play?? is that what is called idk corio enjoys hunting your ass down, kidnapping, drugging, forced into accepting a third partner?? nc touching, abuse of power (peacekeeper), power dynamics, kinda cheating (lucy n corio), guilt-trip, jealousy, threatening, self doubt and relationship problems, murder, betrayal

word count: 3.0k

a/n: lol i complain about wanting to write fluff but all my good ideas r so dark 😭 someone needs to give me tips on how to write girls cuz i have no experience would be easier if i was gay boooo!!

he was like a shadow, stuck to your back, always.

you’d complained to lucy numerous times that you didn’t feel comfortable around him when she played at the hob, knowing he’d be there, in the crowd. “sweetie, he was my mentor. he helped me so much in the games, i wouldn’t be here without him. you love me don’t you? so you need to learn to love him too, he’s a good friend a mine. i love you and i gotta get to the stage baby.” she explained as she ran around getting herself and the covey ready.

you were always front row. wanting to be as close to lucy as possible. she looked especially majestic tonight with flowers in her hair. as you listened to her sing you’d managed to forget about the certain blonde peacekeeper near the back. but he hadn’t forgotten about you, nor lucy.

you’d left to get a drink and you’d came back to an unfamiliar tune. you usually knew every song being played off by heart but this was new.

Everyone's born as clean as a whistle

As fresh as a daisy

And not a bit crazy

Staying that way's a hard row for hoeing

she sounded as angelic as usual and the crowd around you seemed entranced.

As rough as a briar

Like walking through fire

This world, it's dark

This world, it's scary

lucy smiled at you once, just once. which threw you off since you usually got a bunch. especially during new songs and songs about you. was this not also about you?

I've taken some hits, so

No wonder I'm wary It's why

I need you

so it is about me! you thought as you closed your eyes, allowing yourself to sway to the music and singing. you’d hoped you wouldn’t miss a smile headed your way.

You're as pure as the driven snow

your eyes flew open as you stared at lucy, she was looking past you and to the peacekeeper. to coriolanus snow. you’d always been a rational person, you prided yourself on restraint but that restraint was hanging on by a thread. you wanted to jam a beer bottle into his neck. lucy was your girlfriend not his. and yet he smiled stupidly towards her as she sang and you could feel your heart clawing its way up. best to leave now rather than stay and hear more of the ever so driven man.

your head was spinning as you slumped to the floor, in one of your finest dresses yet worst mental states. of course, something had formed between the two. she was in the goddamn hunger games and he was her mentor. trauma bonding? he quite literally saved her life, coached her and you did what? sat at home and hoped.

hope could only get you so far.

your hope and faith in lucy gray baird was dwindling as her lyrics swirled in your head. of course she loved him. who wouldn’t? the man was undeniably eye catching. a capitol man. but you’d always imagined lucy staying away from the capitol, despising them. but maybe it wasn’t the captiol part but the man part. maybe she wanted a true life, a home, marriage and children and everything she could wish for.

what on earth could you provide her with?

“y/n?” it sure as hell wasn’t lucy calling out for you and you knew that. coriolanus’s reflection was prominent in the puddle before you as he neared. great, you sneered, would love to get to know you mr peacekeeper. please tell me how you stole my lovely girlfriend from me!

your chest felt oh so heavy as you heard his footsteps in the gravel, determined and unwavering as he made his way to your slumped body. “what do you want? you wanna gloat?” coriolanus stopped in his tracks, gloat? “why would i gloat?” you looked up at him annoyed, “rub it in my face. you practically stole my girlfriend from me.” coriolanus laughed. actually laughed and it made you want to strangle him with his stupid dog tags.

“sweetheart.” vomit. you wanted to vomit. maybe choking and dying on your vomit would be less embarrassing then this. why on earth was this fuck head calling you his sweetheart. “fuck off.”

you didn’t see him coming. and you certainly didn’t expect his demeanour to snap. but the large hand tangled in your open hair was a big slap in the face to your unreadiness. “you of all people don’t get to talk to me like that. do you know who you’re talking to?” you could hear his perfect porcelain teeth grinding at your words. god this man couldn’t handle an insult. wuss.

“what the hell is your- ow! problem!” you yelped as he dragged you into an alleyway. “you need to learn how to respect your superiors. if you’re nice to me, i can make your life easier. doesn’t it hurt? not being able to fully provide for your family? seeing them struggle? do you really think disrespecting a peacekeeper is going to help? i suggest you straighten your act and thank me for even looking your way. there are plenty of other girls here.”

but he didn’t want those other girls. he wanted you. you with the teary eyes and messy hair. you who he’d been seeing in his dreams and during the day. you with the kind smile and curious eyes. you who were so sweet and pretty but mean when need be. the y/n who was stupid enough to spit such hateful words at a peacekeeper. but he’d teach you. whether it be with words and lessons or actions and bruises. you’d learn your place, by his side and lucy’s, and underneath. but with such fearful, brown doe eyes watering up infront of him, the girl he’d heard oh so much about from lucy. how could he refrain from indulging?

his hand reached out to wipe away the few stray tears that fell as his left extended towards your right, which was clutching your head, where he’d grabbed you. “shh, let me help you.” your hand slowly retracted as your heart ran a marathon. the man was obviously unstable, going from a deceptively caring man to violent. coriolanus smiled at your actions, and it freaked you out. he caressed your scalp in an attempt to soothe, “good girl.” he cooed as your apparent saviour approached.

“sweetie?” lucy called out to you as coriolanus withdrew from your personal space. he walked over to her and she let him. he held her hand and spoke with, love? his voice was soft and comforting, his thumb again caressing the back of her hand as they talked, whispered, plotted? god knows, all you wanted was to leave.

was this your chance?

you tested the waters, slow and calculated movements as lucy nodded in agreement with him. but by the time they were done speaking you’d bolted.

but you sure as hell weren’t getting far with these two on your tail, poor y/n l/n. a little dove trying to spread her wings but they were bound to be clipped.

your feet were throbbing and begging for you to slow down. but your brain was in charge for once, your heart which yearned for your dear songbird pushed to the side as your head screamed and urged you to go. she was in league with him apparently. her seeing him corner you and not even batting an eyelash. did she truly care for you so little? did she want to rid herself of you? she could’ve broken up with you and let that be it. maybe the games had twisted her head.

even as you believed yourself to be gaining distance from the two you could hear the not-so distant steps of determined pursuit, headed your way. how would they kill you? slow and intimate? hasty and brutal?

“if you stop running now we won’t be mad little dove!” lucy shouted in warning as you felt yourself momentarily slow at her words. traitor. you thought to yourself as your body involuntary listened, she still had an affect on you. “she’s right, we love you, we won’t hurt you. unless we have to, don’t give us our reasons.”

“shut up!” you screamed. god, i know we haven’t talked in a while. last minute efforts right? maybe he’d listen to you, save you from your tormentors. you should’ve kept your head clear, focused on running. focused on your surroundings and if you had, you would’ve noticed the nearing tree roots, thick and protruding from the ground, ready to knock you down.

you crawled behind the tree, trying to catch your breath as your hands worked tirelessly to provide some form of relief to your aching ankle.

crack.

you’d been found. you fucked up.

“our little dove, ever the sprinter.”

his words had you lurching forwards in an attempt of fleeing but lucy’s cold hand on your ankle dragged protests and cries from your throat as well as you, back to them. “you should’ve listened before, we would’ve been nice. given you some time to adjust, but you can’t sit and think for a second can you?” coriolanus mocked as his hand trailed up your un-injured leg, “that’s okay, you won’t be doing much thinking from now on. we’ll be taking care of you, since you obviously can’t take care a’ yourself baby.” lucy’s voice was saccharine, like honey, and her smile was even sweeter. the familiarity and comfort of her presence was intoxicating, you felt at peace on one side and the other wanted to jump off a cliff. she lowered your guard and coriolanus slithered right in.

the prick in the side of your neck wasn’t painful, but their words were. “you’re with us now, we’ll take care of you, we promise.” and you were stuck, stuck with them for god knows how long.

you blinked away the sleep in your eyes, adjusting to the room. maybe they had killed you? in their own twisted way they’d keep you forever, in their memories and soul. coriolanus and lucy’s voices swam around your head and blended together. you were wrong. yay.

“it’s a bit early for katniss, even if it’s one of her favourites.”

“she should eat something better.”

“better? don’t go all capitol on me now corio.”

he was smiling, you could tell.

“never lucy gray. but she’ll be weak for a few days, proper meals will help her regain some strength.”

you picked your head up and looked through the window, the lake was evident.

“alright, you go grab it and i’ll stay here.”

“why? so you can get more time with her? if anyone should get extra time it’s me.”

“now who was her partner first? oh that’s right, me. you’re acting as if i’m gonna pick her up and run away. if you’re that scared than we’ll both go. take her with us.”

coriolanus’s head whipped towards the cabin and you quickly flopped back down on the bed. you shut your eyes as you heard the door creak open. “gosh, doesn’t she look pretty?” lucy asked, knowing the answer already. “so calm, i liked her better when she was crying.” lucy hit him, “coriolanus snow!” he stroked the side of your face and you had to resist from turning your head and biting his fingers off.

“little dove.” your eyes opened again, turning your head his way tiredly. “we need to get some supplies okay?” you nodded as lucy went outside to gather the baskets she’d left out earlier on to dry. coriolanus’s hand dug into your cheeks as he forced you to look at him, “i told you i’d make you respect me. now listen, if you try anything when we’re in town i will never let you forget it. you’ll know who you belong to every single day. maybe i’ll pay your family a visit? an appointment with the hanging tree for being rebels? stealing?”

you shook your head violently as you began to cry, “you don’t want that? didn’t think so. you listen to me and everything will be fine. your family will get daily help and weekly groceries. they’ll never go hungry again. all thanks to their sweet little girl. lucy’s too nice, but don’t think for a second she’ll save you from me. you’re mine and if you try anything.” he leaned in to whisper, “i’ll strangle her with my bare hands infront of you.” his words were meant to scare you, and they did. but don’t you know? coriolanus snow doesn’t need a reason to do bad things.

coriolanus was wicked and ruthless when it came to what he wanted, if you had any hope of trying to get through this then you’d need lucy’s attention and help. so you nodded. “words sweetheart.” you swallowed your pride, your dignity, and you shook hands with the devil.

“yes, i’ll do what you say.” he straightened up, his white shirt a contrast to his dark thoughts.

“y’all ready to go?” lucy questioned as coriolanus grinned, “yes, yes we are.” he lifted you up and helped you dress, you hadn’t realised the fact that you were only dressed in his own white shirt, dress to you. he handled you like you were the most delicate object. as if he wasn’t hell bent on breaking you, over and over again. till you were fit to his standards. the captiol standards. the snow standards.

his, his, his.

with how obedient you were, he figured you’d do well in the capitol. which was exactly where he was meaning to bring you.

lucy walked in front of the two of you as you made your way through the woods. coriolanus’s hand was glued to your waist as he held you close, afraid to let go. you were at flight risk of course. his grip was tight and bruising. lucy’s humming distracted you at times, if you were delusional enough you could imagine it to be the two of you. your brothers far infront and the covey following. after an amazing afternoon at the lake, heading home for dinner, maybe a performance or the night shift.

your daydreaming was interrupted when you clocked coriolanus’s missing hand from your waist, and his arm now around lucy grays throat.

don’t you remember? you’d do well in the capitol! you were his! but not entirely, no.

not with her in the way.

you were frozen in place as lucy clawed at him before reaching out for you. a plea, a cry for help and aid yet you stood stuck in fear. a minute, two. she’d put up a strong fight, especially when you ran towards the two, pushing and shoving at coriolanus to let her go. but again, you fucked up.

here lies lucy gray baird, singer, victor, psycho.

obsessed? madly in love? you couldn’t think of another word, and as much as you wished to forget her, forget how she’d practically allowed another man into your relationship and let him kidnap you. her lifeless face and hollow eyes made your heart clench. but soon enough she was rolled over, thrown in a pre-made hole and buried. she’d survived the games but no one survived coriolanus snow.

“don’t forget what i said. don’t forget what you agreed to. you said you’d do as i say, i’m telling you to get up and follow me. we’re leaving district 12.” your face was painted with confusion as coriolanus clutched your face, “i’m going back, and you’re coming with me. don’t ask questions, just do as i say.”

and you did.

when he had you say goodbye to your family, a courtesy, a privilege he’d granted you. you kept it short and sweet, no questions just hugs and false promises of return.

when he ushered you onto the train and he wanted you to sit and be silent, you did.

through his time at the university, he wanted you close to him, living with him. and you did.

through his presidency campaign he wanted for you to charm sponsors and entice newcomers. you did.

when he wanted to marry you in a grand spectacle infront of the captiol and dress you up, you did as he asked.

when he held you down on your wedding night after tearing your dress off, biting and marking you down all over, pushing you down to your knees and took you all over the house, asking you to give yourself to him as if he didn’t take you anyways, you did.

you had no idea why at this point.

for your family? who hadn’t reached out in so long, even when they promised to talk to you every day? coriolanus had them all arrested, punished and hung for inciting riots and uprisings.

for your friends whom listened to your concerns of the capitol peacekeeper who hovered and didn’t make you feel crazy? each of them ended up dead in many different ways, hung, shot, a mugging gone wrong.

you didn’t know at this point and when you looked in the mirror you didn’t recognise the girl who stared back. a captiol sheep, dressed up in the finest silk dresses and slick heels yet the filth underneath the finery, jewels, and makeup weighed you down. each time he touched you, kissed you, fucked you, it felt like a peace of yourself was thrown away.

and as you clutched your swelling stomach, you couldn’t help but feel pity for baby number four.

maybe you’d grow up and find love.

maybe i’ll be able to take you all away from him.

maybe we’ll heal.

you thought, but in the back of your head, a little voice wouldn’t shut up.

you’ll always be his little dove.

[colourstreakgryffin]

Hello !

Could you please write some headcanons with Alastor and m!reader as his S/O , where reader is a fallen seraphim / ex - seraphim?

Thank you in advance !

Hmmm! Okay! I actually wanted Alastor discovering his partner is a Fallen Angel for a while now. I can imagine what would happen… but uh, anyway. Let’s try this out, shall we? Alastor is now my primary Hazbin Hotel man, which I don’t mind! I love this man!

Alastor- Lies and Deception

Why… why would you lie?! Why did you lie?! Why did… Alastor can barely process what he just learnt. His beloved partner, his cute sweetie. A affectionate polite man, you. You’re not a demon at all, you’re an angel and you were a high-level angel as well. Charlie isn’t the only one who finds out her partner is a angel, Alastor did too

“A-Al! I can explain… I just—” “Save it, Leitore. I don’t want to hear from you” and with that, Alastor goes back down to Hell. Not hearing you out, despite when you try to explain yourself. It hurts your soul seeing your boyfriend, now, so closed-off, cold and disinterested

Alastor refuses to talk to you and when he does, he is quite passive-aggressive but yet, he can’t bring himself to be insulting. He is more business than emotions and comes off as very apathetic. It’s just because he doesn’t know how to act around you anymore with this grand discovery drilled into his head

He avoids you like the plague after the incident in Heaven and Adam revealing both you and Vaggie’s angelic origins to the Group

Alastor had ended up just like Charlie. Both him and Charlie are struggling with learning that their partner lied to them and hid their true selves for so long. Unlike Charlie, who vents to Alastor about Vaggie all the way to the Cannibal Colony, Alastor tries to not focus on you… he doesn’t want a reminder

However, he is eventually talked into trying to make it up with you by his dear friend, Rosie. She reminds him that you’re his lover and that he can’t just shut you out over you not trusting Alastor to not throw you out if you told him the truth… oh, Alastor could kiss Rosie right now! But, he can’t. He needs to make up with you after the weeks he’s spent ignoring you

Like Charlie, Alastor brings over a little gift. Surprised to find out that you’ve gotten back your angel wings after so long of merely looking like an average sinner. Three feathery sets, they are gorgeous and they make your eyes pop. Alastor may not like that his lover is an Angel and he’s a true Demon but that shouldn’t keep you two apart… and after Rosie’s talk, it won’t

After quite the long private talk with you and much forgiveness and acceptance and promising, Alastor is once again, by your side and holding your hand. He was harsh in the past about what he considered a betrayal but he has heard your side of it and forgiven you for lying to him. Not everybody is perfect

Alastor may or may not play with your reborn and re-gained angel wings when he is bored or waiting. You’re always right next to him so he’ll just run sharp long clawed fingers through the gentle feathers and be enamoured by how incredible it feels. Alastor also may just take an nap on your back with how comfortable those wings of yours are

Alastor is your sweet devil, a truly corrupted evil monster but he has an opposite in the man you are, a more pacifistic and harmless soul. Just like Charlie and Vaggie but swapped, you and Alastor are the higher-up Angel-Demon gay couple. Alastor is unredeemable and won’t be going to Heaven whilst you, a being of Heaven, is stuck down here in Hell

Alastor much prefers you stay in your original look but now, that also includes the Seraphim wings. Just keep them out of the way whilst you walk and Alastor is completely content with it. He just has to get use to having an angel in the Hotel… he has to get use to having TWO angels in the Hotel

Trust me, Alastor won’t ask about life as a Seraphim in Heaven. He doesn’t even care about it, he doesn’t care what dropped you into Hell. He only cares that you’re in Hell and that you’ll stay in Hell, stay with him. That’s all he’ll ever ask, but if you want to talk about your past in Heaven, he is all ears

Alastor, also, may not be perfect but he is doing his best to accept the reality that you had to lie to him and now that, you’re both cleared it up with one another. Now, you can be 100% honest with each other

Alastor is encouraging to you, encouraging you to let out your angelic origins and not be frightened by all the Sinners. Everybody in the Hotel knows you and Vaggie are from Heaven, just embrace it. He is embracing it one step at a time

“Oh… darling. I know I was quite harsh to you. I was just upset, I thought the man I loved was against me and I was trying to kill me from the inside. I understand you didn’t want to tell me and that’s okay… we’ll get through this little bump together”

[marjoch]

FOR SURE

TA viktor x undergrad jayce. jayce has a big fat crush. viktor gives him his number as a math equation

chapter 1/8

early updates on ao3 @ josmarch

A university in California, November.

The air was cool in the mornings and warm in the afternoon. Jayce Talis, born and raised in East Los Angeles, was no stranger to the sunny weather and the littered streets. He liked the university because it was clean, and it gave him the opportunity to utilize the science theories he’d been captivated by since childhood. As a senior, he was taking upper-level classes, and he was determined to graduate on time.

Today was particularly exciting for Jayce, because he had an advanced chemistry lab. It wasn’t the science that interested him — sure, it had started off that way, as he became better-educated to follow his passion. It was one person. Nearly every class, save for September when the entire class caught an illness, Professor Heimerdinger had assistance from a particularly attractive man. Jayce knew him as Viktor, and that was the depth of his knowledge.

He couldn’t talk to Viktor without prompting. How could he? Jayce had known he liked men for years, but he’d only been with women. Viktor was different. When he collected finished exams last month, their fingers had grazed briefly, and Jayce was still thinking about it.

He felt pathetic. His grades had slipped these past two weeks, in this singular class, and it was a result of being distracted. Even his lab partner, an optimistic but quiet woman named Sky, was running out of patience for his slacking.

“Jayce,” she was saying, while he was lost in thought. He looked at her, and she sighed. “Focus.”

The pair of them were sitting in front of a titration setup, and Sky had been dutifully working to determine the answer. It was now clear that she was growing tired of doing it on her own.

“Sorry,” Jayce reached out to take over. Slow and steady wins the race, he thought as he carefully titrated the solution. Maybe that could work with Viktor. If he eased into talking to him more, maybe he could figure out if he was single and ensure he was gay before making a total fool of himself.

“Jayce.” Sky spoke again, this time out of frustration. Jayce focused on what he was doing, but it was too late — he’d added too much, and they had to start over. Sky took over again, moving the equipment so it was in front of her. She did it herself, then, giving up on Jayce’s help.

Fine by him. Now that he didn’t have to pay attention to two things at once, he could gaze at Viktor from where he was walking alongside the professor. They were conversing quietly amongst themselves, and it was indistinguishable with the noise of other students communicating.

“Nothing will ever happen if you don’t talk to him,” Sky said, shaking her head.

Jayce wasn’t entertaining the thought of embarrassing himself. “What would I even say?”

“Ask him for his number. That’s a good start.”

“He’s the TA, Sky,” Jayce looked at her as if her proposal was out of the question.

“Ask for his email, then.” She was focused on her work, not looking up from her efforts.

Jayce could imagine how it would go. It would be awkward, if he could even get the right words out. And what if Viktor said no? He’d have to see him in class again two days a week. Then again, the semester was ending in less than a month.

“Do it.” She pressed.

“What if he says no?” Jayce’s eyes found Viktor again. Much to his surprise, they made eye contact, as Viktor was already looking in his direction. Jayce looked away quickly. “Fuck.”

“What?” Sky raised an eyebrow.

“Is he still looking over here?”

Sky smiled at Jayce’s struggle, and turned. Viktor was looking back at the papers in front of him on the desk, and the professor was pointing something out. “All clear.”

Jayce buried his head in his hands. “This is ridiculous.”

“I agree,” Sky affirmed. “Why are you torturing yourself like this? Just talk to him.”

A voice interrupted their conversation: Viktor. “Is everything okay over here?”

Jayce sat up, moving his hands back down to the table, feigning attentiveness towards the experiment at hand. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

Viktor shrugged. Jayce thought it was unfair that he could be so nonchalant while Viktor's mere presence nearly made him fall apart. “I’m just checking in. A few other students had questions.”

“We’re alright, thank you,” Sky jumped in before Jayce could go on. Viktor nodded and turned to move on.

“Thanks,” Jayce breathed, of her quick reflexes. He watched Viktor walk away, transfixed.

Sky wasn’t done. “Actually, Viktor?” The teacher’s assistant looked back, waiting. “Jayce had a question.”

Jayce shot her a glare. Viktor came over, and Jayce blanked. The moment of silence stretched so long he was sure he’d blown it.

“He wanted to ask for your number,” Sky suggested.

Jayce looked at Sky again, less of a glare, more of a nonverbal “what the hell”. She shrugged the slightest, and went back to the titration.

“Is that true?” Viktor asked Jayce, some sort of amusement in his tone. Jayce’s heart fell into his stomach. Just as he’d suspected: he looked like an idiot.

“Yes,” he admitted, with a sigh that communicated the betrayal he felt.

Viktor held out his hand. “Give me your notes.”

Jayce paled. He’d hardly taken any notes, and there were sketches of Viktor he hadn’t shown anyone. He flipped to a new page and handed it over, heart pounding at the possibility of it being looked through.

Luckily, Viktor wasn’t inspecting notes. He clicked his pen and started writing. For the first time since seeing Viktor on syllabus day, Jayce felt a real flicker of hope. When Viktor was finished, he clicked the pen again and handed Jayce the notebook.

“There you go,” he said, and he moved onto the next pair of students without another word.

“You’re welcome,” Sky said, swirling the beaker. She beamed at their science project. “Got it.”

Jayce’s eyes didn’t leave Viktor until Sky held the beaker in front of him, waiting for affirmation. “Oh, nice,” he said, recognizing her success. He looked down at the number Viktor had written.

Or, rather, the series of numbers. On the page in front of him was a carefully crafted mathematical equation, one that daunted Jayce just by looking at it. He sighed heavily. Sky peered over his shoulder.

“Damn,” she laughed. “You gotta hand it to him, that’s unique.”

“This is going to take me all night.”

“I’m assuming no study hall, then.”

“Fuck study hall,” Jayce said. “I won’t be able to study with this on my mind.”

Sky straightened up the notes she’d taken on their experiment, and passed it over for Jayce to sign. He did, right by her own signature at the bottom. “I’ll hand this in. Sounds like you’ve got your work cut out for you.”

Sky put her hand on his shoulder as she passed, and Jayce collected his things into his bag, save for the notebook, which he continued to look over as he walked out. Just before passing through the doorway, Jayce’s eyes found Viktor’s again, and he was almost sure he could see him smile.

“Any luck?”

Vi, Jayce’s roommate, was laying on the couch with her legs over the armrest and her head turned to the side to watch television from a different angle. The coffee table had a beer for each of them and an open box with remnants of a pepperoni pizza. Jayce’s plate was in the kitchen sink. Vi’s was on the floor within reach, a half-eaten slice waiting to be finished.

Jayce was sitting on the other side of the couch, calculator in his left hand, pen in his right, and notebook on his lap. The page was now filled with scrawling numbers, little pieces of the puzzle as he slowly worked out the equation.

“Not yet,” Jayce said. “But I’m almost there, I can feel it.”

Vi reached over to take a sip of her beer. “All this over a phone number. Must be some girl. Or guy.”

“It’s a guy.”

“Finally,” Vi sighed. “Don’t get me wrong, I like the women you see. I just think you seem like you’d have a husband.”

“I’m not getting married anytime soon.”

“Okay, pretty boy,” Vi set her beer back on the table.

Jayce ignored her comments and went back to focusing. This would all make sense eventually, he knew it. He put his hand on his forehead, and then he frantically typed into the calculator, writing furiously as he went.

Once he’d found his footing in the endgame, he soared through to the final answer. Staring at the ten digits felt like relief. He stood up, smacking the notebook on the table and reaching for his phone.

“You got it?” Vi sat up, swinging her legs forward.

“I think so,” Jayce said, unlocking his phone, hands trembling. He added the number to his contacts, and sent an easy first text.

Is this Viktor?

Vi was just as invested in what was going on. She stood up and went to stand by his side, looking down at his phone. They both waited for a response.

I think you have the wrong number.

Jayce sighed in frustration. “I must’ve worked something out wrong.” He went to delete the contact, but before he could, a notification popped up.

Kidding

Jayce rolled his eyes, and Vi laughed. “You got a good one,” she said positively, leaving him to sit back on the couch, pulling out her own phone. “Oh, hey, will you tell your sister to text me back?”

“If she’s mad, there’s not much I can do about it,” Jayce answered, starting to text Viktor back but deleting every attempt. “What do I say?”

“You tell her Vi’s waiting,” she said.

“Not about Caitlyn.”

“Right,” Vi nodded. “I don’t know, small talk? How was his day? Just shoot the shit.”

“I don’t shoot the shit.”

“Yeah, you do,” Vi picked up her beer again. “You’re good at conversation, and people like you. I don’t know why this Viktor has you all scrambled.”

“He’s different,” Jayce started at the text. Before he could say anything else, another text from Viktor came through. “He asked how my day is.”

“Three texts in a row, man? He wants you.”

Jayce refused to believe that. He sat back down on the couch, reaching for his own beer, needing a drink after this. “He’s just being nice. He’s the TA.”

“I’ve heard of professors fucking students. This isn’t half as taboo.”

Jayce typed out a response, and put his phone down the second he sent it, nervous in his very bones.

I’m good, how are you?

There was no reason for him to feel this way over small talk. If he could hardly ask about Viktor’s day, how could he get to know the inner workings of his character? He decided that was a problem for future Jayce. Despite the nerves, this adrenaline was unbeatable.

Good enough. Do much with your evening?

Jayce smiled a little at the text, and responded.

Spent it working out your equation

“You’re head over heels,” Vi was watching him as he conversed via text, and he hadn’t even noticed her gaze. “You’re practically giggling at your phone. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this.”

“It’s not my fault,” Jayce argued. “You don’t get to choose who you have a crush on.”

“I’m not blaming you,” Vi put her hands up. “I hope he’s cute, at least.”

Jayce almost zoned out completely just picturing him. “He’s beautiful,” he said.

Vi laughed, and finished her beer. “I believe you,” she said. “I saw you with Mel.” She whistled. “That woman was fine, and you kept yourself together. I’m interested to see how this goes.”

She stood, picking up her plate and bottle and carrying them to the kitchen. She disposed of the bottle and leftover pizza, and set the plate in the sink. “I’ll do the dishes tomorrow,” she said, getting another beer out of the fridge and utilizing the bottle opener.

Jayce was lost in his phone as another message from Viktor came through.

You should probably do your homework.

Jayce typed furiously. Vi watched him, and laughed to herself. Jayce didn't even notice.

I’d rather talk to you

Jayce tossed his phone onto the table, burying his head in his hands again, waiting for a response.

“Jesus, Jayce,” Vi propped her legs up on the coffee table.

Jayce didn't look up. “How do you do this?”

“Do what?”

“Talk to women.”

Vi raised an eyebrow. “I thought Viktor was a guy.”

“He is,” Jayce sighed, “but that doesn’t make it any easier.”

Vi raised an eyebrow. “How do you talk to women?”

Jayce picked up his phone, and set it back down when he saw there wasn’t a response yet. “I don’t know, I just talk to them. This is different.”

“You keep using that word. Different. Maybe it’s a good thing.”

“I never said it was a bad thing,” Jayce began, and his phone buzzed. He picked it up quickly, and his face fell.

“Viktor?” Vi questioned.

Jayce was disappointed. “It’s just Cait.”

“Let me see that,” Vi reached for the phone, and Jayce held out of her reach.

“It’s not your turn,” Jayce shook his head. “Fix your thing with Caitlyn on your own time.”

“I’m trying,” Vi grumbled. “She’s holding a grudge.”

Jayce was over it. “Maybe if you hadn’t gotten into that fight, she wouldn’t have had to bail you out, and she would’ve passed her final exam.”

Vi rolled her eyes. “I said I was sorry. I didn’t know she was studying, or I would’ve called you.”

Jayce shrugged. “I would’ve let you spend the night there.” Vi punched his shoulder, but it wasn’t aggressive. “Hey,” Jayce acted like he was wounded, rubbing his arm. “Fine. You should call me first next time. Then you wouldn’t be in this situation.”

“I hate being a lesbian,” Vi muttered, drinking from her second beer.

“No you don’t,” Jayce stared at his phone screen. It buzzed, and he sat up straighter.

We could talk over drinks. Friday?

“Holy shit,” Jayce breathed.

Vi was closer in an instant, reading over his shoulder. “Oh, hell yeah,” she smiled. “You’ve got a date.”

Jayce looked to her. “How do you know it’s a date? This could be a casual meeting. Just talking.”

Vi rolled her eyes, settling back in her seat. “The day you stop second-guessing yourself is the day you become irresistible.”

Jayce shook his head, phone in his hands, thumbs stalled as he racked his brain for a proper response. Not second-guessing himself was easier said than done. He never felt like this with his last girlfriend Mel, but then again, Mel knew what she wanted and made her intentions clear. Jayce couldn’t read Viktor. Not to mention, Viktor was far more intimidating. Mel was stunning. Viktor was mysterious.

Give me a time and place, and I’m there

The second he sent the text, he regretted it. There had to be a better way to say that.

Vi was scrolling through her phone, checking her social media and sending a sixth text begging Caitlyn to respond to her.

Viktor sent a time and place, just as requested. Jayce put his phone down and sat back. “Friday,” he said. “That bar off campus. Eight o’clock.”

“Go get ‘em,” Vi winked.

Jayce just rolled his eyes, finishing his beer before he stood and took the empty bottle to the trash can.

He took it upon himself to do the dishes, even though Vi had promised to do them the following day. He needed to occupy his mind, but it didn’t distract from the constant thoughts of the teacher’s assistant. What was he doing with his life? He was supposed to be an academic, working towards a degree that would finally allow him to finish the research he’d started in his youth. And, despite that, the only equation he wanted to solve was Viktor.

Jayce’s phone buzzed.

Goodnight

He sighed deeply. It had barely begun, and the game was already over.

Viktor had him right where Jayce had dreamt of being.

Jayce didn’t know how badly Viktor wanted him back.

[thegreatwizardelwin]

I Won’t Say I’m In Love - Part One

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Joanne Harcourt x Male Reader

F/N L/N is a student in the Sapphire Owl house at Weston College. For some reason, he keeps running into a Scarlet Fox student in his day to day activities. Intrigued, he tries to learn more about him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Compared to other students at Weston College, you were rather neutral when it came to students from other houses. Of course, you were loyal to Sapphire Owl during sports events and exams. However that didn’t seem to matter when it came to your hobby: proofreading. 

In your freetime, you discreetly accepted drafts for essays and research papers from assorted underclassmen. You, well-known for being a well-read literature enthusiast, would do your best to give them revisions. Humbly, you accepted small gifts in return. Extra pencils, saved biscuits, clips, extra notebook papers, you name it. It wasn’t that you charged them, it had just become a custom amongst your more frequent clientele. 

You interacted as infrequently and as inconspicuous as possible, even though your friends found your hobby hilarious. Nobody liked a boy who was too friendly with other houses.

However, some things just can’t be helped. It started as a passing glance in the hallways. He took you by surprise, what with how his eyes were fiery amber and his hair the color of meringue. In your eyes, no one could be more beautiful than that. You reminded yourself that you only admired him, nothing more.

But your fascination grew. Absentmindedly studying his face from across the library and catching him doing the same. You noticed how he sat, walked, and studied alone.

Late one afternoon, you found him browsing the same aisle as you. His hair curtained his face, a small cluster of books in his hands. He saw you out of the corner of his eye and quickly averted his attention to one of the books he had been previously scrutinizing. You noticed the book was one you had been interested in too. Darn.

As aloofly as you could, you made your way over to the boy and the object of your desire. He turned to you, confused as to why you were so close all of a sudden.

“Are you going to read it?” you whispered, reaching for the book. You took it off the shelf and held it loosely in your hands between the both of you.

He sighed, staring down at the novel.

“I don’t know. I have so many other books I’m reading, I don’t want my bedside to become a library of its own.” he replied, almost with disappointment.

You laughed quietly at his response.

“In that case would you care if I borrowed it first? I’ll try and read it as fast as possible so I can get it back on the shelf for you.” you offered.

He looked at the book one more time, then looked at the… quite honest looking face you had. He nudged the book back to you, nodding.

“It’s alright. I don’t need it today or anything.” he whispered, turning to leave the aisle. You pulled the book to your chest and reached out to gently grab his shoulder.

“What’s your name?” you asked. “ I see you all around.”

He flinched at your touch, looking at you with a slight rosy tint to his cheeks.

“Joanne Harcourt, second year.” he answered.

“I’m F/N L/N, a ___ year.” you stated in return, your hand falling to your side.

He gave you a shy smile.

“I’ll make sure I remember.” he said, and scurried off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is my first fanfiction! It will be strictly fluffy and not very romantic (i imagine its hard being gay in an 1889 public school). I tried to keep this chapter short, almost like a pilot 🌺 Part 2:

[forestshadow-wolf]

Just real quick! Something not soapghost (sorry)

I was rewatching httyd 2 (one of my favorite movies btw)

And I remember the first time I watched it, when Stoic was singing to Valka, I hated when Gobber kept interrupting. I thought it was annoying, and didn't belong.

But watching that scene again and I actually kind of like it now. And to properly explain this I just want to put an image in your head.

So imagine this - you, a fresh-faced young viking, has grown up next to his best friend your entire life. He's been beside you through thick and thin, and has never once left your side. Now you yourself have nevr seen any lady that's caught your eye, but your best friend? Oh He's got his heart locked on one. He's quite the fella, has no shortage of women that he could wed. But no, he want the kind-hearted woman who refuses to harm a dragon.

You think maybe she's too soft for this life. She doesn't belong. But you're best friend loves her, and you're his best friend for a eason so you don't say anything.

At first you leave them alone, the waves of love that radiate from them are sickening. They can't keep themselves away from eachother for a second. So you let them be.

Imagine around this time that perhaps you realize lads catch your eye more than lasses do (this is canon btw, and the VA for gobber is also gay)

At some point, after a few moon cycles of your best friend and his lady being together, the three of you start hanging out. You realize this lady is quite nice, still too kind, but you can see why your friend likes her.

At some point you can't keep it in anymore, and confide in your friend that you won't be looking for a lass, but rather a lad. Your friend claps you on the back, and says he's with you always, and it's like a weight has lifted off your shoulders. But then you hear a noise behind you, and you whip around. Standing before you is your friend's lady, and you freeze, but she gives you a nice smile and says she won't say anything. She says the village won't think anything of it, but regardless she won't say anything.

A few moon cycles later and you really do like this lady now. She may not harm dragons, she may fight to save them, but she is just as fierce as any viking you've ever met. And through it all you're best friend and his lady are tag teaming you, trying to set you up with other lads.

These are your best friends, you couldn't imagine your life without them. You do everything together. They never left your side, even when you lost your leg. They've been with you through everything, and you them.

It's been years now. And your best friends are still just as in love now, as they were when they met, in fact they might be even more so. They're married now. They're still trying to set you up with a few guys. You have dinner every night at their house. You cook because like a perfect matching pair, neither of them can cook. And you all laugh and sing together, and you know that no matter what happens it'll all be okay as long as they're here.

They have a baby together, it's a wee little thing. The lady worries something's wrong with him, but your best friend says he's gonna be the greatest chief there ever was.

Then imagine one night there's an especially bad attack, you see your best friends' house catch fire, that's where the baby is, and quiet possibly the lady. You're too far to do anything. But your best friend isn't. He races to the house.

The next thing you know a dragon busts from the roof with the lady in its clutches. Your best friend bursts from the house, little bundle of furs in hand.

After thay day everything changed. It was the same just... less happy. Less kind. But it can be kind of okay with three out of four pieces.

You watch the little boy grow up. Your best friend he's happy, but he worries. He never sings anymore, that's sad. He won't put him in dragon classes because he's scared of losing him too.

Eventually you convince him to allow it. And it goes great until it doesn't. And your best friend disowns his own son for befriending the very beasts that took his lady, the boy's mother.

And then you see that very beast save your best friend's kid's life. And your with your best friend through all of that. Life and death, thick and thin.

And then imagine you find the lady! Or well the kid did. And all of the sudden, this light that died in your best friend's eyes lights up again. And then for the first time in over 2 decades you hear your best friend singing again. Just once. And it's been so long. And then you hear the lady! And now it's like everything is better, just like old times, and you can't help but sing along.

So there! Now you all know some (probably) useless knowledge :)

[lookatmysillies]

Aoki Intimacy Levels 🌀

I’m so behind on this so since we’re all doing it I’m throwing my hat in for my stinkyass child! Note that Aoki is inherently a very paranoid and cynical character at times so some of his thoughts might reflect that cute little quirk. I totally made up some context for characters he hasn’t really interacted with so enjoy

Airin (@apriciticreveries): 90%

We don’t really even… talk about things when we’re together. But I’m comfortable in our silence. I feel as if I understand you on some level. I hope I do. I imagine if I’d ever had a little sibling… well. I think it’d be like you in a way. If humans are really made of stars like they say, I think we must have come from the same one.

Andri (@alien-til-i-stage): 5%

You’re not them and you never will be. I wish you didn’t exist. I hate you. I hate—that you don’t.

Akane (@aakaneeee): 40%

You’re kind, and approachable. We don’t have a deep relationship or anything but I think you’re pretty cool. Sometimes I feel a bit intimidated by you. I don’t think you’re trying to harm me, though, which is a nice bonus!

August (@junebluues): 45%

You remind me of me in many ways, which is why I find you a bit unsettling. Anakt Garden really hasn’t been good for either of us, huh? Also you kind of seem a little cult leader-ish I don’t really know what to do with that

Daian (@apple8ees): 94%

I didn’t really understand why you bothered with me at first - I mean, you and Kay are close, but I didn’t know you actually liked me as an individual and not just an extension of him. It was… eye-opening. I think I really love you. I wish I didn’t. It means I have stake in your—continued survival. I don’t want to have a stake in anyone anymore. It’s too hard.

E (same as Daian): 50%

I still love this shadow of you and you’re gone and I don’t want to

Ish (@chevalperd): 82%

I used to think you were so unburdened. You seem unburdened. Act unburdened. But I don’t think you are at all. I think you’re just good at hiding it. Good thing I’m good at seeing through bullshit. I just wish I could pinpoint the particular type of bullshit we’re dealing with whenever you close yourself off. Guess I’ll just have to look harder.

Kay (@rockwgooglyeyes): 96%

Why can’t I figure this out? I see your apathy since it happened and my instinct is to fix it. Life is so much simpler when you’re fixing things. You tell me it’s illogical to seek to fix human beings but then, I’ve never been logical like you. Am I trying to do to you what they did to you? I probably can’t help but keep trying. I just want you to be happy.

Kel (@sotogalmo): 30%

You keep to yourself, mostly. I don’t particularly have a problem with it - we all take care of ourselves. But it makes me itch. Like I’m doing something wrong and I don’t even know what. Or you are and I feel like I’m on the receiving end. Both?

Mercury: 70%

We have many things - and people - in common. Getting along with you is a little easier than it is with others. I don’t feel I have to make any grand gestures to get through to you. …Nad sure does seem to hate that we’re friends though, heheh.

Nadohan (same as Andri): 94%

You’re brash, impulsive, cutting, you present an arrogant front - worst than all of it combined, you’re an Anakt Garden darling. Couldn’t you be doing more for us? Even for yourself? Don’t you even want to save you? Do you know something I don’t? Either way, you’re impossible to decode. You’re not the best companion I could ask for, that’s for sure. But you’re the one that’s mine.

Para (@shakingparadigm): 40%

Is this how August feels, being the youngest of us, wondering how they fit into the picture? You’re so kind and interesting - but I don’t know what to say! I’m not even certain I want to say anything. There’s a comfort in friendly feelings from afar. Makes things less complex.

Plip (@awaggaa): 80%

Like Nadohan, I’m vexed by your proximity to the aliens. No wonder the two of you are such a pair. Are you gay That aside, I find you to be a charming person at heart, with knowledge and wit that pushes me to compete. It brings a spark of light into my life, that race.

Star (@starry-skiez): 85%

You’re very sweet. More tactile than a lot of others, which I don’t mind. I’m challenged by your forwardness to be more open myself. I could probably use the challenge. Daian sure does like you, too, which is a shining endorsement of your character, in my eyes.

Syd (@tsukacchako): 30%

I don’t know much about you, but I do observe. There’s a level of transparency and a level of total obliqueness, like two sides of one coin. A bit of an enigma, I suppose. …Well, I thought it was fun being kids in Anakt and switching glasses to see how different things looked through one another’s lenses. I think I do that too much these days—I can’t even remember what the world looks like WITHOUT someone’s lenses over my own.

Toon (@nottoonedin): 80%

You show such talent yet seem shy somewhere deep down. It’s easy for me to feel at ease with you, these days, knowing someone so bright is human nonetheless. Presumably human? There aren’t - more androids hanging around, right? Hey, where are you goi—

Vant (@ivanttakethis): 85%

A supportive and consistent presence, you’re a breath of fresh air. A true friend. You always give me the benefit of the doubt even when you shouldn’t.

Zen (@zerostyrant): 55%

Of all the people here, you might be the most frustrating to try and decipher. It feels like you have your own mission, separate from the rest of us. Whatever you’re looking for, I hope you find it. I hope you’re prepared for the possibility you might not.

I’m terribly sorry if I forgot anyone Aoki’s had interactions with aaaand if our sonas haven’t interacted, feel free to reach out in my inbox, I don’t bite I just procrastinate 😃

[markantonys]

So bizarre to see fanboys jumping through hoops to find a way they can incorporate as many of Mat's plot points from TDR and TSR into their imagined version of s3 but NOT include Cauthor CPR. I'm sorry the cursed dagger on a spear makes you mad but you're okay with Min or Nynaeve saving him from hanging???

smh!!!! mat only does 1 important thing in all of TDR and TSR, and that is receive mouth-to-mouth from rand. and they would rather sacrifice that than any of his other stuff!

if it can't be rand, then nynaeve would be an okay substitute since she knows healing and hasn't had any chances for a good emotional moment with mat yet; however, imo if she has TOO many moments of successfully helping her friends via non-magical means, it would lessen the urgency of needing to break her block. thus, nynaeve saving mat with CPR would arguably be counterproductive to *her* arc of needing to break her block. (unless it instead is the trigger moment that causes her to break her block and she's thus able to heal him magically, but, while that's a sweet idea, it doesn't make much narrative sense for mat to be the one serving such an important emotional role in nynaeve's arc, no offense to him haha)

as for min, there's no need for the show to outsize her and mat's emotional connection i.e. they need to be good friends early on to make their series endgame work better, yes, but they do not need to be (and shouldn't be) each other's #1 most important emotional connection for two seasons straight. think of the heteronormative ship-baiting it would cause for show-onlys if mat and min had a focal emotional connection for two seasons straight culminating in her giving him mouth-to-mouth! ain't happening.

and all that being said..............as of now there's no reason to believe it can't be rand giving mat CPR! mat not being part of the waste storyline by no means precludes his doorway incident from occurring in a way that can involve rand. it could happen in the first couple of episodes before the gang's split up. it could happen in the finale with mat entering one doorway in tanchico and getting yeeted out into rand's lap on the other side of the continent because the pattern craves cauthor.

plus, with this scene being perhaps the single biggest and most iconic rand-mat emotional moment in the entire book series, i don't see why the show would instead give it to a different - and less important - mat relationship. (unless they absolutely had to because it turned out to be logistically impossible for it to be with rand, but, again, we have no reason to think that's the case.) if you look at the whole series, rand is more emotionally integral to mat and his story than nynaeve or min are, so why shouldn't he be the one mat has this big moment with? plus, if mat vs. couladin is in the cards for s4, iirc mat's implied motive there is that he intentionally hunted down couladin during the battle to help out rand even if he makes it sound like it was an accident, so s3 Cauthor CPR would set up a) how ride-or-die these two are for each other and b) mat feeling like he owes rand big time for saving his life, and wanting to do something major to return the favor.

overall, the fanboys often have really strange priorities when it comes to judging which book events are important to the overall story (Male Badassery) and which aren't (Everything Else), and their show predictions reflect those priorities very tellingly. i mean, my show predictions also reflect MY priorities very tellingly, but my priorities are a lot closer to rafe's than the fanboys' are, which hopefully leads to more accurate predictions. if you think a gay showrunner isn't going to do everything he possibly can to fit in the iconic-to-the-gays moment of rand giving mat mouth-to-mouth, you're kidding yourself!

[bloodyminyard]

a (long) comprehensive list of buck related things in 7x04 that have me losing it as i rewatch:

- the stupid starry eyed look he has while getting the tour from tommy

- the terrible “i need mo jo” joke that tommy laughs at purely bc it was endearing

- “you didn’t call me because you wanted to see the toys”

- “you need to raise your bar kid” my GOD the “kid”

- ofc, the “no way!! eddie was in the army!”

- god they are so FLIRTY “really?” “my fees are competitive” “let me buy you a beer no WAY buck is this clueless

- eddie being so excited about the fight, and specifically the idea of buck joining help

- “keeping my options fluid” SIR

- evan?!?!?!????

- the close up shot as the fly off my heart

- the look on bucks face when eddie talks about tommy, boy is devastated

- “i saved a baby in a pipe once!” yes you did were so proud

- not buck related: but i adore ravi so much

- OKAY BUT BUCKS STUTTER !! they way he trips over his words when he’s surprised or nervous or even upset 😭

- “i do. i really do.” MY GOD OH MY GOD FUCK ASHHH AHHH

- and the SIGH after as eddie walks away, the building up the courage to ask more

- THE SAY HIS FACE DROPS WHEN EDDIE ASKS HIM TO WATCH CHRIS OHHH EDMUNDO WHEN I CATCH YOU

- “i keep saying, chris it’s not a video game” “because it’s harder than a video game???” maddie i see you and am so sorry you have to deal with this

- SAME WITH “he’s made an impression in a very short time” “i can see that” LIKE SHE IS SO NOT GONNA BE SURPRISED WHEN BUCK COMES OUT TO HER 😭

- “i don’t think you lie to a child just to ingratiate yourself” bro it’s not that serious i promise

- sorry brb imagining buck asking chris all these questions about tommy and chris going 🤔🤔🤔

- buck being upset that eddie invited tommy to play basketball even though eddie always asks him and he says no bc he doesn’t like it… he’s so me i can’t

- “was there a heart around it?” there might as well been maddie!!!

- peacocking buck we love and hate to see (it’s so embarrassing i have to close my eyes. “maybe we should hoop” sir please stop)

- the pouting OLEASE he’s so

- his smile

- the “evan” throws me off every TIME but also it kindaaaaa

- “what are the odds?” bro chill

- the smile when tommy fists bumps him oh i see you gay boy even if you don’t yet

- “so i’m your basketball beard” brother you don’t even KNOW

- i’m sorry the song that’s playing while they play basketball is “playing with the boys”🤔🤔… the lyrics too “i don’t wanna be obsessed but my desire with the boys” (and YES i am aware it’s a top gun reference, however that movie is also gay is hell and so is this song, moving on)

- tommy cocking his head when buck runs into him like oh my

- poor chim does not deserve to be put in the middle of all of this

- “well you bucked that up didn’t you” :(

- okay this scene between maddie and buck afterwards is actually so important to me, i love their ability to communicate, and how buck openly admits that he doesn’t know if he meant to hurt eddie or not, and that he was angry and lashed out, and maddie’s reaction to it :( “that’s not how you get someone’s attention”

- “i guess i was trying to get his attention” buck is the representative of the “i don’t know why i do the things i do until tons of self reflection after the fact” club, same im the president actually

- i do love that we get to watch him try and figure out why he acts and feels the way he does in real time! even at the end he still doesn’t entirely know until tommy is in his face staring at his lips

- the stutter is back 🫶

- “evan…” STOP THE WAY HE SAYS IT THAT TIME MAKES ME GIGGLE I CANT

- this entire scene drives me crazy btw i can literally pick it apart piece by piece… but the way he smiles throughout it makes my heart go akrjeidjdjsjd

- the chemistry is fucking IMMACULATE btw!! the flirting is so natural and it shows through buck being oblivious about it!! like brother no one stands that close to each other

- buck figuring out how he feels AS he speaks!!! poor boy is trying to catch up as fast as he can

- everything about the “okay” after tommy says “i can teach you”… the smile, the eye squint, the head tilt, like oh my GOD

- the way the tone changes when buck says “good” my GOD, the way his face drops as he comes to the realization that maybe it was about tommy the whole time

- the “cause trying to get your attention has been kinda exhausting” punches me in the gut EVERY TIME I WATCH THIS LIKE FUCK OH MY GOD BUCK LIKES MEN FR? and the way he says it GOD, like i said, he’s literally figuring this out as the words come out of his mouth (“i guess so”)

- okay my ONE nitpick about the kiss scene is that tommy grabs his chin, and then when it cuts it’s the two fingers under the chin, it’s inconsistent and i think i like the chin grab better

- the absolute STUNNED look in bucks eyes after the kiss!!! as the perfect oliver stark put it: he’s found something he’s been missing for a long time

- tommy is so worried in the split second before buck tells him that it was okay

- the wordless nod after tommy asks if it was okay THIS MEANS SO MYCH TO ME

- you can FEEL the sense of relief and wholeness radiating off of buck

- “better than fake mouth static” AKSHSISHS

- his eyes following tommy’s lips as he laughs, and then the brief look down like his whole WORLD has just been turned upside down before tommy speaks again

- i am so fucking here for buck being asked out and being stunned by it

- the stutter again 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

- tommy’s smile as he leaves like tee hee ur kinda cute

- the entire of his expressions at the end. there’s panic, there’s confusion, there’s happiness OLIVER STARK THE MAN THAT YOU ARE !!!!

in conclusion: this is everything i wanted and more, the brain rot is everywhere, i cannot escape this episode

[ahamkara-apologist]

it's also wild because like. Mara Sov is outright manipulative. she outright says she has plans to kill you if you go astray. she has plans to kill everyone, actually. she gets information she has no business having just to do that even iirc. meanwhile Osiris is a stressed out gay old man who is trying to save everyone except himself.

Okay I WILL defend Mara here and say that while she is a manipulative bitch, yes, that's actually a good thing to have handy. The Young Wolf is fucking dangerous and so are many in the cast of Destiny, so having contingency plans to kill people as needed is kinda necessary (just look at Eris in the dark future). But Mara is out here playing games of 4D chess with the Witness and the likes of Savathun- she needs to play god like that because it's basically her job. The major issue with her is the fact that she doesn't know how to NOT play puppetmaster, and takes it into her personal life- what she did to Uldren was a prime example of that, and while I have many thoughts on why that is, the fact of the matter is that Mara is a person who does what she needs to do with the coldness and cruelty of a deity because that is the niche she's carved out for herself and what she needs to be to ensure the survival of humanity.

Osiris, on the other hand, is NOT playing 4D chess with the Witness- he's a soldier, a defender, a blade. And not only that, he acts the way he does because he's driven by anxiety, paranoia (well-placed paranoia too!), and the fact that for the longest time, he's been alone. He was outright exiled from the Last City! He was alone in the Infinite Forest with nobody other than Sagira and his own mind! That's a lot of centuries to be by yourself, and don't forget that those centuries were preluded by social isolation from his peers and betrayal beforehand. Osiris operated the way he did because his OCD had him constantly running on the assumption that the worst-case scenario was going to happen, and he had the experience from his time as Vanguard and his subsequent exile to show that not only did nobody believe him, they also didn't take it seriously (or took it too seriously) and wouldn't help him with it. Like, no fucking wonder he's always running around acting like he's the only person who's taking things seriously and throwing his all into solving the problem. His mind is hardwired to assume the worst and he has proof that people will not help him with it (though LF has him confronting that)

Like, I myself have OCD, and those repetitive thought spirals are no joke. Imagine that you're confronted with a problem, and your brain automatically jumps to the worst-case scenario for that problem. If you've gotten cognitive therapy for that, you know this isn't the case, but knowing doesn't change the fact that your mind is CONVINCED that the worst case scenario WILL happen, and it will get lodged to the forefront of your mind with all of its gory details while you try your best to ensure that it won't occur. Doesn't matter if you have to shift to doing something else- that fear, that worry, that will always be right in front of you. Meds and cognitive therapy have worked for me on that, but Osiris doesn't have those, and on top of it- he's got prophetic visions! I can't IMAGINE how awful that would be to deal with!!

That's also why his character development after Sagira's death is so big imo- as tragic as it was, Sagira dying for him forced him to really slow down and realize that rushing into things without thinking about his own safety harmed others, not just himself, and his subsequent reminder of his own mortality forced him to be reliant on others instead of refusing to let them help him. Part of why he was so impatient and brusque in Lightfall was because he had to rely on the Young Wolf and Nimbus to deal with an issue that he considered his own, and while it didn't go exactly as planned, I think that's also why he's softened up significantly since then. That, and him being unable to rush headlong into things and to just sit and enjoy his time with Saint (which he never allowed himself to do before because if he had the Light, what was his excuse for not fighting the Darkness) helped him tremendously. It forced him to face his flaws, learn that he could rely on others, and to slow down in life, and he's been doing much better as a result of it.

Osiris has only ever harmed others by completely disregarding the harm that he did to himself, and recent events in the story have forced him to reflect on that and change it. And maybe by being a bit of a blunt, extremely-honest ass that nettles sometimes. That's pretty much the extent of his flaws imo

[totally-sapphxxx]

I’ve thought about making this post for years, and have rewritten it several times already.

I’ve seen so many stories of people talking about how they ‘always knew’ when it came to their sexuality. I haven’t seen as many talking about struggling to accept yourself. I think I would’ve liked to have seen those stories too when I was figuring things out. So, I’m deciding to share part my own journey, the difficulty I had and sometimes do still have accepting myself.

When I realized I was attracted to women further than just thinking they’re beautiful, I was convinced I was bi. That was then followed by the usual wondering if I was faking being bi, that I was actually straight. For the first few years I didn’t even consider that I was a lesbian.

Eventually I accepted that I’m attracted to women and that won’t change. Even then, I held onto being bi or pan. I held the hope that I could still end up marrying a man.

Coming from a conservative, brown family, being queer is that much harder. Since as far back as I can remember, I’ve been told how to ‘be better’ for my ‘future husband’, things I should learn, ways I could be a good wife to a man, etc. There’s such a large expectation on me and other women like me in brown families. I specify ‘brown families’ because, in my experience, there’s less acceptance there and sometimes more extreme responses.

Brown families are culturally more community-driven. As such, there’s a massive emphasis put on how others will see you and your family, and saving face. So, being queer would be a huge embarrassment. I know that when they find out, I’ll lose a lot of family.

As a result of all of this, I was determined to be bi. I was determined to just focus on finding a man to be with, to date and love. The fact that my romantic attraction is based on personality helped immensely. I could find a man to be happy with, I was sure.

But then came sex. The first time I saw a naked man in front of me, I got so turned off, that the shock of the realisation I wasn’t at all attracted to men physically, made me cry. Dramatic, I know, but it was really overwhelming in the moment; it felt like the whole future I’d imagined just turned to dust and fell through my fingers.

You’d think that that would’ve lead me to try accept that I’m only attracted to women… no. I spent the next few years trying to find the ‘perfect’ man. Maybe if I found one I was more emotionally attracted to, maybe if he was more physically attractive, maybe if I could tick enough boxes, I’d find a man to stay with.

It never happened. I’d dated at least three men who were, in all aspects, perfect for me. I couldn’t do it. My downfall was sex 😂😭 I just couldn’t do it. No matter how ‘perfect’ the guy was.

Alright. Okay. But I do like women, right?

Being with women was the easiest thing; a stark contrast to my difficulties with men.

So then… I’m a lesbian. No man will ‘make me straight’.

Accepting that has been so difficult. I started just flirting with women, hooking up with them, not building proper relationships… I was enjoying myself, I guess… In retrospect, I think that even though I’d finally accepted I wasn’t going to marry a man one day, I wasn’t ready to accept that I’d want to marry a woman one day. I wasn’t ready to accept the implications.

But then I met my girlfriend. She doesn’t know it, but being with her, and seeing her be so comfortably gay, seeing her unapologetically call me her girlfriend to anyone who asks, helped me so much. Being with her drove away the fears and self-loathing. I know I’ll be okay.

For the first time in my life, I’m okay with my family learning about my sexuality. For the first time in my life, I want to bring home a woman and unapologetically love her in front of my family.

It’s been a long journey, but I’m here. Finally.

Sorry for the long post, I just needed to share this. I think that hearing other stories of difficulty would’ve made my own journey a bit easier.

I think the writing here is a little all over the place, but this post would be much longer if I made it flow a bit better.

[iblameashley]

Crosshairs, Bullets and Affections

Military | Male | Gay

5,300 words Content: Alternate universe, longing, angst, cursing, injury / wounds, mention / depiction of blood, captivity / imprisonment, military level violence, mention of torture, gun violence, death, some German, poorly edited Gay Stuff, Love, Fluff

Inspiration for this fic

König | Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick | Kaz?

!!!SFW!!!

In the heat of battle, König saves the life of enemy soldier Gaz, leading to his capture and disavowal from KorTac. Struggling with his feelings, König faces suspicion and hostility from the 141. Assigned to integrate him, Gaz is put at the forefront of König's awkward attempts at romance, while Ghost and Soap watch from the sidelines. König asks himself the age old question, 'do you believe love can bloom even on a battlefield?'

Consequences

König sat in a surprisingly well-lit cell. The concrete walls and steel bars a clear reminder of the new reality he found himself in. The space felt cramped, but then again, Konig remembered that he's not an average sized man; his legs hanging over the small bed that he rested on.

Upon being brought to the one-four-one base, he was promptly stripped of all his tactical gear and tossed in this cell. Captain Price had been generous enough to allow Konig to keep his hood – a source of amusement for the rotation of guards – and was left to his long-sleeved shirt and pants. Though they had also taken his boots and replaced his with slippers, nothing that could be used as a weapon was left, but at least he was relatively warm and comfortable.

His eyes flickered to the calendar on the wall outside the cell. June sixteenth. Six month and - he had to think about it - four days since his confinement started.

Originally, Konig had been in earshot of some of the more creative suggestions from the members of the one-four-one relating to any information he had. Ghost, ever the pragmatic man, had advocated for a ruthless approach. He had argued that the Colonel was too seasoned to be susceptible to typical tactics, and suggested a tried and true method, according to him; jumper cables and a car battery.

Soap on the other hand, saw no value in interrogating Konig regardless. He saw the giant of a man as too big a threat to keep around and had instead suggested the use of some C4. Most of the team had assumed he was joking. They were really hoping he was joking, but his mate Gaz had been injured and emotions were running high.

Price however, understood the gravity of the situation and the delicate balance of power at play. He saw the value in Konig as an asset, and a chance to gain insight into the inner workings of a known military threat. Besides, Konig had saved Gaz's life on the battlefield, and that alone had piqued Prices interest in the man. Saving an enemy combatant and allowing yourself to be captured in the process? What the fuck had the man been thinking?

The cell door opened and snapped Konig out of his thoughts. His eyes wandered up to see Price standing there. He dragged a metal chair into the cell and the guard closed the door behind him, though stayed close; his hand on his holster, ready to make a move if Konig tired anything.

König's jaw clenched under his sniper hood as he met Prices gaze, his walls coming back up.

“I can't imagine this has been easy for you.” Price began, clearing his throat. He leaned back in the chair and crossed one leg over the other. He tried to appear relaxed by resting his hands on his knee.

“I've seen worse.” Konig fired back with feigned disregard, his accent thick and his voice raspy. “...Just another obstacle.”

Price nodded, he understood the position Konig was facing. “I understand your reluctance to speak to me -to anyone- since you were brought in, but I really need to understand what brought you here.”

Konig narrowed his eyes. Though Price couldn't see it, his lips were pressed into a thin line.

“I had my reasons.” He replied flatly. “Reasons that don't concern you.”

“I would argue that they concern me greatly, Colonel.” Price tapped at his knee, staring Konig down with curiosity. “You aided one of my men on the battlefield. Why?”

In a fleeting moment, König's eyes betrayed him, and a glimpse of vulnerability flicked between the two men.

Price raised a brow, noting the reaction and realizing there was much more to this than Konig was letting on.

“...You had the chance to run. You didn't.... and now, here you are.”

König's body tensed and he gripped at the think mattress below him. “Sometimes the cost of doing what's right is higher than we anticipate.” He replied.

“I wasn't aware KorTac knew what doing 'what's right' was.” Price said, the irony not entirely lost on him.

König sat there quietly, what was the point of replying to that particular comment?

Price let out a sigh, waving a hand apologetically.

“We don't have to be enemies, Colonel.”

“König.” König corrected.

“König.” Price smiled, “Help us, and I promise you, there will be a place for you in this task force.”

“We'll see.”

With that, the conversation had lapsed into silence. Knowing that König was unwilling to speak to him any further, Price stood up and grabbed the chair. The door to the cell opened and he left the holding area.

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Actions

Amidst the gunfire and explosions, König has spotted someone who shouldn't have been there. Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick. He'd recognize that man anywhere, though he would have noticed sooner, had the man been hanging upside down from a helicopter.

Somehow, the one-four-one had gotten involved in this particular conflict and now there were fights to be hand on two fronts.

It had happened quickly, as so many things do on the battlefield. Gaz had been stuck by enemy fire, a bullet tearing through his shoulder and sending him tumbling backwards. He landed hard on the ground and yelped out in pain.

König's instincts had kicked in before his brain could stop him, and he sprinted across the battlefield until he hovered over Gaz's prone form. He crouched down as gunfire whizzed past them, and he quickly assessed the extent of the injury.

Gaz was going to bleed out if nothing was done, so Konig grabbed the man like a sack of potatoes and hauled him to cover. He worked frantically to stem the bleeding, ripping the shirt to get a better view of the wound.

“That's my favourite shirt, mate...” Gaz had mumbled. He was too unfocused to realize who was tending to him.

“I will buy you a new one, gutaussehend.” König replied as he began to tend to the wound.

It wasn't pretty by any means, but it would do. The bleeding had been stopped, some fragments of the bullet removed and it was disinfected. König had used most of his gauze to bandage the area.

König had barely had a moment to sigh in relief when he felt a gun at the back of his head. “Move away from my mate, nice and slow you slag.” The gravelly British voice commanded him.

“Ja.” König nodded.

He moved with an impressive grace away from Gaz before slowly standing up; his hands raised in surrender.

Ghost kept his weapon trained on König as he peered down to Gaz. A mixture of shock and confusion washed over him as he saw that bandages wrapped around Gaz's arm.

“The fuck is this, mate?” Ghost grunted as he returned his full attention to König.

“I... I don't know.” It was honest. König's own mind was racing with questions about what he had just done. His heart was racing, and if it weren't for the sniper hood over his face, Ghost would have clearly seen the grimace adorning his face.

“Don't play fucking games with me. I should put a bullet in your fucking head...” Ghost snarled. His finger moved towards the trigger, but he thought better of it. Price and Soap were on the way, so there was no need to shoot the man dead. Yet. “Drop all your weapons nice and slow. And kick them away.” He commanded.

König complied and removed his pistols and combat knives, setting them gently down on the ground and kicking them out of reach one by one.

“Step back.” Ghost commanded him once more, flicking the barrel of his gun and Konig.

“Ja.” König nodded.

He took a step back. And then another until he was several feet away from Ghost, Gaz and his weapons. Ghost would have plenty of time to shoot him if he made any stupid moves.

“He will be okay if he gets proper treatment.” König explained calmly to Ghost. He was trying to diffuse the situation as best he could.

“Didn't ask your opinion, slag. Keep quiet.” Ghost hissed, though his attention was split between König and Gaz who was passed out and breathing a bit heavy.

It felt like hours had passed before Price and Soap finally made their way to Ghosts location.

“Steamin' Jesus!” Soap exclaimed as he came to an abrupt halt. He took in the scene with shock and awe.

“Guten tag.” König said a bit more cheerfully than a man with a gun aimed at him should have.

“The fuck happened here?” Price questioned Ghost as he pulled up behind Soap.

“Our German friend here wanted to play medic with out Sergeant.” Ghost nodded in Gaz's direction.

Price moved to Gaz to inspect his situation and Soap pulled his firearm and aimed it at König.

“I got yer back, LT.” Soap reassured Ghost. “I think yer the best man tae cuff the bastard.”

With that, Ghost roughly bound König's hands, his gaze lingering on the captive soldier with a mix of distrust and disdain. As they made their way to the exfil location.

The same question was on everyone's mind; “Why had an enemy soldier helped one of their own?” Not that that question would be answered anytime soon. Even as König was loaded onto the helo, he simply stared into the abyss of uncertainty.

“Scheiße” König cursed himself silently. He knew he had fucked up, but there was something that pulled at his heart, knowing that Gaz would be okay. Though he probably couldn't say the same for himself.

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Feelings

It was early in the morning when the lights flickered on and illuminated the cell, stirring König from his uncomfortable slumber. He muttered something in German, his voice tinged with annoyance until he saw Gaz standing outside his cell.

He swallowed hard and sat up on the cot. “Guten tag, Sergeant.” He croaked out.

König yawned as he leaned back against the cold concrete wall.

“Gaz. Just Gaz is fine.” Gaz advised as the door to the cell opened.

He entered slowly, and like Price had, dragged a metal chair in with him. His presence seems to fill the room with warmth. König's heart fluttered, and he began to fidget as he tried to hold Gaz's gaze.

“How are you holding up?” Gaz asked as he made himself comfortable.

“It is a holding cell, so it holds me well.” König joked. Attempted to joke. He wanted to hang himself as the stupidity of it washed over him.

Gaz chuckled and shook his head. “Okay, then...”

König's throat was dry as he struggled to find his voice a second time. His fingers seemed to dance on his knees as he gathered his thoughts.

“I am... fine.” He finally replied with a faint shrug. “Trying to make the best of this situation.”

Gaze smiled at him and nodded. “I can imagine you've been a bit bored being cooped up in here all these months.” His voice, his accent was smooth as it wormed its way into König's ear. “But you're still alive and in one piece.”

König's eyes fell to Gaz's shoulder. His arm was no longer in a sling like he has seen a few months back, and he must be healed by now.

“As are you.” He replied nervously.

“Mmm.” Gaz nodded again. “Because of you, I kept my arm and my life.”

There was an unspoken hint of gratitude to Gaz's words, but he was a bit too prideful to outright say the words 'thank you', at least right now.

“Still going through physical therapy. Still can't aim straight with it, but I'm getting there.” His jaw clenched shut and his brow furrowed as he wondered why he had admitted that to König.

“You will recover. You are still young and strong.” König smiled under his hood, he eyes softening as he spoke.

König couldn't shake the feeling of unease that gnawed at him. He didn't understand this attachment he felt towards Gaz, but he knew it was dangerous for a few reasons. Aside from the fact that he had never felt this way about another man, if he allowed himself to explore these feelings, he'd solidify his desertion.

But as he looked into Gaz's pretty brown eyes -only slightly more enticing than his pretty lips- he could help but let a flicker of hope course through him.

“There... was one other reason I stopped by...” Gaz mentioned in a casual tone, though his eyes were downcast as he said it.

“Hmm?” König tilted his head like a puppy. “Tell me, mein freund.”

Gaz hesitated for a moment, but quickly decided it was best to just be honest. “You've been disavowed.” He spoke the words slow and calmly. “Since the one-four-one never made any demands to exchange you for anyone or anything, and because you were seen willingly helping me, and surrendering to Ghost, KorTac has officially cut their losses with you. We received the news last night.” Gaz explained.

König's heart sank like a stone into the cold depths of the ocean. 'Disavowed'. The word echoed in his mind. All because he had done what he had thought was right.

He shook his head. No, this was all his fault for sure. He had helped the enemy, of course he was disavowed. He was a traitor, and he would have done the same to anyone else on his team.

He grappled with the thought of never seeing Austria again. His friends or family. Everything about his life now lay shattered at his feet, an a storm of emotions began to rage within him.

“I understand.” Was all he managed to mutter out.

And that was that. The conversation was over and Gaz knew it. So with a nod of his head he got up and left König to his thoughts.

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Decisions

There was no choice but to start integrating König into the one-four-one. Well, Ghost had vehemently opposed the idea, stating that König could never be trusted. Price had understood the concern, but also wasn't planning on sending König on missions anytime soon, let alone giving him access to restricted areas or information. Soap had also voiced his concern; first in Scottish Gaelic and then in English.

“I don't fuckin' trust him, Price.” Ghost voiced his disapproval once again.

Price rubbed at the bridge of his nose, clearly exasperated by this circular conversation.

“I understand your concerns, Ghost, but we need to make use of him--”

“It just doesn't sit right with us.” Soap interjected.

That was the last straw for Price. It had been two weeks of this conversation happening again and again, and now his own subordinate was cutting him off mid sentence.

Price was a patient man, and more than happy to entertain the thoughts and concerns of them men under him, but enough was enough.

He stood up from his chair and placed his hands on his desk. He took a deep breath and glared at both men.

“Listen to me very carefully.” His voice was low and seething with rage. “If either of you twats bring this subject up again, or if you ever interrupt me again, I will kick your asses out of the one-four-one. Now, the next thing I better hear from either of your mouths is 'yes sir' before you leave my office and fuck off. Do you understand me?” He hissed.

There was no room for black and white in Prices words, the look in his eyes conveyed his seriousness about the situation, and Ghost of all people knew how fucked he'd be without his job on the task force or Price to have his back.

Ghost and Soap nodded. “Yes sir.”

They promptly left Prices office.

Gaz had been sitting off to the side reviewing some documents as this exchange occurred. To be fair, Ghost and Soap had burst into the room uninvited, and Gaz had been working with Price at that time. He had felt no need to stand or engage as Prices limit had been reached.

And now, he sat there flipping through pages with a smirk on his face.

“Feel better, sir?” He chuckled as Price straightened himself out and took his seat again.

“Fuck off, Kyle.” Price gave him the side eye, but even his beard and tone couldn't hide the amusement.

“I have a job for you.” Price said after a long moment of silence. He reached into a box and retrieved a cigar. He took his time lighting it and enjoyed several long puffs before he continued. “This is a delicate situation, but I believe König has potential beyond information.”

Gaz's brow furrowed slightly, concern crossing his face as he processed Prices words.

“The man has been here what, seven months now? Almost eight? He hasn't once tried to make an escape, and he's been even more docile since you gave him the 'bad news' as it were.” Price puffed on. “I say we give him a real chance, and if he fucks up, we put a bullet in his head.”

Price shrugged and tapped some ashes into a nearby tray.

“I want you to take point on this, Gaz. He seems to like you, so might be easier for you to help integrate him into the force. Obviously I want you to keep a close eye on him, and you won't be alone, but you'll be in charge.”

Gaz's jaw clenched. He took his time thinking about it, but figured he would agree without protest. This was an opportunity to learn why König had helped him all those months ago. And he couldn't deny the joy he would take in superseding even Ghosts authority on this 'project'.

“What I say goes?” Gaz asked. “Outside of your final decision, that is?” He clarified.

“Your say goes.”

“Consider it done, sir.” Gaz agreed. “When do I begin.”

“Now. Why not take out lumbering German to the mess for some lunch.” Price laughed before taking a drag from the cigar.

“...yes sir.”

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Targets

König stood at the firing range stall waiting for Gaz. His nerves were frayed to say the least as he looked around the room to see Ghost and Soap off in the distance; glaring and judging him. Ghost had a hand on his pistol, still ready to put him down at a moments notice.

“Alright, big guy...” Gaz's words snapped Konig out of his daze and he looked down at the man. Into those big, brown eyes. “Let's see what ya' got, yeah?” He beamed.

König nodded and swallowed hard. He wanted to do right by the one-four-one, he wanted to earn the trust of this whole team, and he'd be lying if he said he didn't want to impress the handsome young man handing over a rifle to him.

König took the rifle and stepped into the stall -which was way too small for him- and, in an attempt to break the tension decided to tell Gaz a joke.

“Hey, Gaz...” König began, already grinning under his hood, “why did the soldier bring a ladder to training?” He asked as he inspected the weapon.

Gaz gave König a quizzical look and tilted his head slightly as he thought about it.

“No idea, why?” He finally asked.

“To reach new heights!”

There was a deafening silence in the range as Gaz, Ghost and Soap processed the joke. The moment only broke by Ghost snorting in reply and looking away.

“Fuckin hell... that was bad...” He murmured as his shoulders shook.

“That's... certainly a new one.” Gaz replied to König, trying to distract the man from Ghosts reaction. He cleared his throat and extended a hand to guide König to the targets down the range, “Alright, lets focus on the targets now.”

König felt his cheeks redden with embarrassment, but he couldn't help it, his heart fluttered when Gaz was around. Without another word, he turned to the targets and readied his rifle.

Pop, pop, pop.

He fired several rounds from the first rifle and his targets. Several head shots and a few straight through the heart.

Next up was a pistol. He was equally skilled with that.

Gaz recognized his skill, and had read in his file that König had always wanted to be a sniper, so he decided 'what the hell' and wanted to give the man a chance. As he guided König to the sniper range -with their shadows in tow- the giant spoke up once more.

“Why did the soldier cross the road?” He asked, smirking like an idiot under his hood.

“I dunno, mate,” Gaz shrugged, already shaking his head. “Why?”

“To get to your side.”

“Christ...” Ghost sighed.

Gaz legitimately laughed at the joke and gave König a pat on the back. “If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to sweet-talk me.”

“This is painful.” Soap whispered to Ghost as they finally made it to the sniping range.

“Mmm. But entertaining in its own way.” Ghost replied as the two men watched Gaz and König set up.

“Just take your time, mate.” Gaz reassured him as he stepped away and left Konig to his practice.

Sniping is a game of patience, and König had been denied his sniping career for two reasons. The first was his size; he made a better battering ram than a sniper, and the second was his need to fidget when bored. But he was determined to prove to Gaz he had what it took.

He took aim and steadied his breathing. His hands were steady and after judging the distance, he fired.

“Fuck...” he hissed under his breath. He had hit the target, but not where he had wanted.

He aimed again. He focused. He fired.

“Der mist!” He grumbled a bit louder this time.

He took one last shot and at least his something vital on the target.

With a resigned sigh, he put the safety back on and moved himself into a sitting position on the floor as the target came swooping in for Gaz's examination; and Ghosts whispered ridicule.

Gaz took time to examine the target, and was overall impressed with König's shots. Only one would have likely been fatal, had it been a person, but the other two could certainly be crippling to an enemy combatant.

“Not bad, not bad.” He nodded as he looked down to König. “Guess we'll just need to set up some more practice time for you.”

König's mood perked up at the idea of spending more time with Gaz and quickly stood up, towering over Gaz in the small box of the sniping range. “Ja, I would like that!” He exclaimed.

He looked over to Ghost and Soap and and then back at Gaz, lowering his voice. “Hey Gaz, what would be your perfect date?” He asked.

Without missing a beat, Gaz grinned and replied, “April twenty-fifth, its not too hot, not too cold, all you need is a light jacket.”

He was so fucking proud of this reply, and loved watching the gears turn in König's head.

The dumbfounded look in König's eyes tipped Soap over the edge and he buried his face in Ghosts arm, snickering at the custerfuck that was this interaction.

“O-oh... okay.” Konig replied still confused.

He handed over the sniper rifle and turned to leave the booth, in a bit of a hurry at that, and slammed his head into the top of the door frame as he attempted to re-enter the base.

“Gottverdammt!” He yelled, felling the rage build inside him. He had fucked up his sniper practice, Gaz wasn't into him, Ghost and Soap were making a mockery of everything and now his head was hurting like a motherfucker.

“You alright there, big guy?” Gaz asked in a soft, sincere voice. He placed a hand on König's arm and turned him around. He could easily tell what König was feeling.

“Yeah...” König grunted, rubbing his head. He took a moment to breath and calm himself down before continuing. “Gotta watch out for door frames, they sneak up on you...” he tried to downplay the embarrassment. “Well... maybe not you...” He added in a deadpanned tone.

Gaz let out a deep laugh, not realizing that König hadn't been joking, just stating a fact.

“Aye, Gaz here is a shorty.” I Soap joked as he and Ghost moved past the two and entered the base.

“Hey, Soap... get fucked.” Gaz laughed.

“I wouldn't talk, mate... you're shorter than Gaz.” Ghost reminded Soap before giving one last glare at König. The meaning was clear; fuck with or hurt Gaz and Ghost would ensure König disappeared without a trace.

“Fuck, never thought I'd see a man flounder so hard. Big mans got it bad.” Soap remarked as he and Ghost made their way down the corridor.

“Better than anything on the telly, though.” Ghost reported. “Four pints says he completely blows it.” He added, staring down at Soap.

“Deal.” Soap grinned.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Secured

It was late in the afternoon, and the sun was starting its drop towards the horizon. Long shadows were cast over the ground as the ruins of of the enemy stronghold smouldered in just below. The task force was wrapping up a mission and were currently attempting to regroup back at exfil.

König had been brought along, but he had not been authorized to partake in the mission proper. Price had relegated him to extraction duty alongside two other soldiers.

There was an unsettling silence that washed over the land just after Soap had radioed in that the mission was complete and they were heading back. Maybe it was soldiers intuition, but König had a bad feeling.

Sure enough, and only moments later, the sound of gunfire echoed in the distance as Ghost, Soap and Gaz dashed from the foliage and into the open field.

Bullets whizzed by them as they ran, and they fired back sporadically as enemy soldiers burst through the cover of the trees.

“Give me a weapon.” König commanded one of his chaperones.

“Negative.” The man replied as he reached for his assault rifle. “You don't have authorization. Stand down and let us handle this.”

König wasn't asking.

Faster than the soldier could react, König slammed his hand into the mans throat, dropping him to the ground, gasping and panicking as he fought for air.

“I'm sorry mein freund.” He said as he walked away and unlatched the container that stored a sniper rifle.

He worked quickly to assemble the weapon, making sure to give it one last look before using his towering height to climb onto the roof of the truck. The other soldier finally noticed him, and the look König flashed him was warning enough. Do not try me.

The soldier nodded and returned his attention to his comrades charging in their direction.

König laid down on the roof and set up the rifle.

He licked his lips as he peered through the scope and acquired his first target. He flicked the safety off and calmed himself -as difficult as that was, seeing Gaz in danger again- before placing a finger over the trigger.

“That's it, maus... run into my trap.” He smirked as his finger pulled the trigger.

The rifle discharged with a sharp crack, the thunderous roar echoing across the landscape. It struck the target like a bolt of lightening dropping the man instantly.

“Pop.” König commented, proud of himself.

Several more booms erupted from the barrel as König took down enemy after enemy until his team was in the clear and there were no more soldiers pursuing them.

He flicked the safety back on and hopped down from the truck as Gaz, Soap and Ghost came to a halt.

“You weren't authorized to use that.” Ghost grunted, trying to suppress the need to catch his breath.

“Lay off the man, he saved our arses.” Soap huffed, punching Ghost in the side of the arm.

He walked past König and gave him a pat on the shoulder, “Thanks for the assist, chum.” He smiled.

König's eyes lit up with excitement as he turned his attention to Gaz. He extended his arms and walked with a confident swagger towards him.

“Mine freund!” He exclaimed as Gaz looked up at him, his chest still heaving and sweat dripping down his brow, “Did you see that! I got them all!” His voice boomed with pride.

Gaz just grinned and shook his head. “I can't say I saw it, but I knew you were helping us when the gunfire behind us stopped.” He joked as he took one last, deep breath. “You did good, König.”

The adrenaline was still coursing through his veins when out of nowhere he leaned down and wrapped his large arms around Gaz and pulled him into a tight hug.

“Thank you, liebling!” He was beaming under his hood.

He picked Gaz up off the ground and held him at face level.

“It's all thanks to you. It's all thanks to your trust in me.” König continued as he squeezed Gaz a bit tighter.

“Okay, okay!” Gaz laughed, patting König on the shoulder. “Put me down!”

“Nein!” König replied in a surprisingly playful tone.

Truth be told, he never wanted to let Gaz go. Fuck, he'd never have touched Gaz if it hadn't happened by impulse. That and Gaz smelled so goddamn good.

“Guys!” Gaz called out to Ghost and Soap, “Guys!” He called again with a huge grin on his face, “This dudes great, can we keep him?” He laughed loudly.

König was looking at Gaz with heart eyes, and it didn't go unnoticed by the man wrapped in his arms. How could it? He was wrapped in the mans arms!

“Make you a deal, big guy...” Gaz said in a quiet voice, slipping his hand under König's hood to ghost his fingers over the back of his neck. “Put me down, and you can take me out for a few drinks. Just the two of us. How's that sound?”

König's heart nearly gave out at the thought.

“A date?” König asked, needing desperately to know this wasn't just drinks between friends.

“A date.” Gaz confirmed with a confident nod.

“Ja.” König said as he lowered Gaz back down to the ground. “A date sounds wonderful, liebling.”

“Jesus fucking Christ!” Ghost yelled with a rage Gaz and Soap had last heard when a rookie tried to touch his mask. “Konig you walking Sequoia tree, what the fuck?!”

König's eyes widened. The soldier he attacked.

“Fuck.” He grunted, knowing he was about to face Ghosts wrath, and likely Prices when they got back to base.

Gaz bit his lower lip and shook his head. He gave König a slap on the ass and walked away, “Well have that date after you get out of solitary.” He winked at the large man and give him a finger gun.

König lowered his head and began his march to a probable death. “Es tut mir leid, Ghost!” He called out as he disappeared to the other side of the truck.

[slveepyscwrs]

Are you serious about the writing fics...if so a Kuroo x reader Angst fight breakup pleeeaaase😭

When it comes to writing fics about gay volleyball boys, my friend, I'm always serious... 💅✨

Anyways, I hope this angsty breakup fic hits you in the feels as much as it did for me!

(I really enjoyed writing this, so to everyone, let me know if you want a part two– Should Kuroo reconcile, or should Kenma save the reader?)

Without further ado, let's get into your request! (This will also be cross posted to AO3!)

A Love I Never Knew

Summary: All of your heart was with the one person you adored the most, Kuroo Tetsurou. When things started to turn dark for you, you were sure that he would be there. You trusted him, you confided in him, and yet the result of that was the appearance of his true self– one that you never could have imagined in your wildest dreams, or more accurately, your darkest nightmares...

Info/Warnings: gender neutral reader, breakups, cliffhanger ending, aggressiveness, emotional breakdowns, self-esteem issues

“Are you okay?”

When it came to being asked that question, lately, you honestly didn’t know how to respond. Of course, you knew what to say: “I’m fine!”

Your self esteem, on the other hand, told an entirely different story.

You just couldn’t bring yourself to look in the mirror lately. No matter which way you looked at it, you couldn’t consider yourself beautiful. In your eyes, there were so many imperfections on your face, your body, everywhere.

To make matters worse, you had been losing sleep over it too. You had lost a lot of your previous cheerful spirit, as your eyelids began to sag.

Soon, your insecurities about your appearance were beginning to affect other parts of your life too. You couldn’t focus in class or in social activities anymore, because you felt like you weren’t good enough in anything.

Now, you were even beginning to feel like you weren’t good enough in your own relationship too. Kuroo was so cool, so intelligent, so confident… and you were just an awkward, scrawny introvert.

Basically, this was the exact opposite of him.

“Kuroo deserves way better than me…”

This was the thought that was running on repeat in your mind, as you slumped down on the couch in yours and his shared apartment. Your face was buried in your hands, as an even darker than usual cloud hung over your head today.

Kuroo didn’t know about any of this yet. He was always so upbeat and lively, and you didn’t want to put a damper on that with your trivial troubles.

This wasn’t all that possible for you at the moment, though. The concerns about you and your usefulness to Kuroo only got worse. Since this could affect your relationship, maybe now was finally the time to come clean to him.

“He’s always so carefree… He’ll know what to do, and maybe I won’t have to worry anymore…”

You were still anxious about telling him as you waited for him to come home from volleyball practice, but at the same time, you were confident that he could lighten your mood.

As a result, your eyes remained fixed on that door in a desperate anticipation. You didn’t even turn on the TV or browse through your phone to kill time until he came back like you usually did.

You needed Kuroo. In fact, today was probably the day you needed him the most.

When the door finally did swing open, your expression brightened a little. You were still shaking from the anxiety, but you were relieved that he was here at last.

“Baby, you’re home!” You jumped up to greet him.

Kuroo, on the other hand, didn’t seem nearly as enthusiastic. He wore his towel around the back of his neck, dripping sweat with an exhausted expression on his face.

This made sense for him. He didn’t like to show it to others, but you knew that he could get really wiped out when practices got intense.

Still, you knew that this was urgent, so you hoped to get his attention nonetheless.

“Practice was rough today, huh?”

“Hm, yeah. Definitely.” He nodded in agreement, but still didn’t make eye contact with you.

“How are the others?” Kuroo loved to crack jokes about his teammates, so you thought that this might snap him out of it.

“They’re alright. Annoying and chaotic as ever.” He still completely ignored you and brushed you off, and began to trudge off to the room that you two slept together in.

Your heart was beating fast under the weight of your feelings, so as much as you wanted to let him rest, you needed to talk to him. Therefore, you ran after him to make him talk to you.

“Hey, is something wrong?” You said this in a caring and concerned voice. He did seem really, really tired, but he usually wasn’t this low on energy. Despite everything you were going through, you also wanted to be there to listen to him if something was wrong.

What Kuroo said next, however, was something that made your face drop.

“Nothing’s wrong! I don’t need to be interrogated right now, love. Just leave me alone, ugh.”

Now, this sounded much more like he was annoyed with you rather than just being tired. You hadn’t meant to ‘interrogate’ him, you just wanted to know about his day.

He never reacted this badly before. Something was definitely on his mind, and you had the feeling that it had more to do with you than with volleyball.

“I’m really sorry… It’s just, I needed to talk with you about something.” You squeaked out in a lower tone, now becoming increasingly afraid of what his reaction would be.

“Fine, but make it quick, I have other things to do… Come to think of it, what is the matter with you today?”

Unlike you, his tone wasn’t filled with nearly as much care. It was like talking to you was a chore that he had no choice but to complete.

Taking a deep breath, you attempted to pour out your heart into words.

“It’s just that I don’t feel good enough… I don’t feel pretty enough, my personality isn’t good enough… And now I feel like I’m not good enough for you.” By the time you finished, your breath was shaky and uneven.

You still had some slight hope that this would make him soften up, but unfortunately, this couldn’t be further from the case.

“What’s with all this sappy stuff? Jeez, you’re acting crazy! You used to not give a shit…” He was massaging his forehead in a way that was intentional, making it clear to you that you were the one giving him that headache.

“No… That’s because I was just hiding it from you…”

“Well, what do you expect me to do about it?”

His tone was becoming harsher and harsher, while yours became softer and softer. This sudden change was literally taking your breath away, and not in a good way.

“Um… you are my boyfriend…” You looked up at him with eyes gone wide with fear, shame, and embarrassment.

This gaze only exacerbated Kuroo’s annoyance. He rolled his eyes, and moved his lips silently in a way that was mocking the way you spoke.

“Yeah, I’m your boyfriend, not your goddamn therapist.”

This was the final nail in your heart, shattering it into pieces. The carefree, lighthearted Kuroo that you had fallen in love with just wasn’t that same person anymore. As you realised this, tears began to sting at the corners of your eyes.

“I know, I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. At least answer the question, please… Am I good enough for you, Kuroo? I’m so sorry…” 

At this point, your voice was barely audible. You hardly knew what to say. Everything that you thought you knew about Kuroo was changing so quickly.

He had begun to turn around and go to the bedroom anyway, but at these words, he stopped in his tracks. He stood there like that for a few seconds, and you saw his hands clench into fists. The rising and falling in his chest became more ragged, as his breaths filled with negative emotions.

Every second that he was still made the dread inside you grow, but the face that you saw when he turned back around to face you suddenly and swiftly frightened you even more.

“I get home after a long day, and all you can do is cling to me like a fucking abandoned puppy. And instead of just letting me go like a sane person, all you say is ‘I’m sorry!’ It’s so goddamn corny and annoying… But you know what? I agree with what you said earlier. Maybe you really are not good enough for me.”

His fists balled tighter, as he screamed these words at the top of his lungs through clenched teeth. 

This new piercing volume sent the entire atmosphere around you two into utter silence. You couldn’t believe that this was real. It had to be a terrible nightmare, one that would end, and let you wake up to Kuroo cuddling beside you in the bed.

Yet, this wasn’t a nightmare. This was the reality of what Kuroo truly felt about you.

If your heart was shattered before, this made the pieces break even smaller and drop to the ground. As for your heartbeat, it felt as if it had stopped in your chest. Heck, time itself seemed to slow around you.

It was one thing to believe the worst about yourself, but having the one who’s supposed to love you the most say that those beliefs were correct all along made it feel like the world itself beneath you was giving out.

Your body wasn’t just trembling now, it was full on shaking. Your knees swayed back and forth, making you feel like a jelly that threatened to give way and drop to the floor any second now.

Your eyes that were now stuck open as wide as they could go couldn’t hold it back anymore, and silent tears rushed down your face. The shock was so intense that you couldn’t even make any noise with the crying. With all these tears, your throat began to burn.

“I have to say something, anything to make it better… It’s all my fault, I should fix this…”

You could hardly form thoughts like these, much less put them into words. Meanwhile, Kuroo kept his eyes fixated on you in pure disgust. He had a look on his face that made it seem like the fact that you were still in front of him was something that he absolutely loathed.

Whatever words did come to mind mostly stopped in your throat. Any noise that did come out was in the form of choked up croaks and squeaks.

Finally, somehow, actual words came out, only to be immediately cut off.

“Kuroo, I–“

“Just forget it already! If this is how you’re going to be, I can’t take it anymore! I’m fucking done with you. We’re over, now get out of my house, now!” 

You already thought that his voice couldn’t get any louder, but its magnitude just kept climbing and climbing until it got to a point where you felt that it could blow the roof off. His face was scrunched up in pure fury, and his eyes directed that rage into yours and straight into your soul.

Whatever he was feeling, Kuroo now seemed as if he had never loved you at all.

And just like that, a beautiful relationship that had lasted months, one that you hoped would stretch on for years to come vanished just like that. All your hopes about Kuroo disappeared into nothingness.

As reluctant as you were, you now accepted that what you had with him was gone, and couldn’t be fixed. 

However, more than that, you didn’t think it was even safe to be here anymore. Judging by his body language, his posture, his actions, and his words, standing there for even a few seconds longer would run the risk of Kuroo’s anger escalating towards physical violence.

Your knees gained just enough strength, and you bolted out the door in a fit of loud sobs.

When you were gone, Kuroo returned to normal and sighed, but not out of relief. He couldn’t pin it down exactly, but there was something gnawing inside him… He was observant enough that he knew deep inside that was guilt.

Still, even though he did know, he would never admit it. He wouldn’t admit it to himself, and definitely not to you. He couldn’t take back what he did, but either way, he most certainly wasn’t going to go running after you. Instead, he simply shook his head and wandered off inside the bedroom.

It was raining outside in the dark of night, and not just a light shower. Water rushed down from the dark clouds at high speeds, hitting the ground with incredible sound and force for such tiny droplets.

It didn’t take more than a few seconds for you to get soaking wet in these conditions, but you pushed through and kept running. You didn’t know where– it was late, and no one you knew would be willing to take you in at this hour.

You jumped down the stairs to the ground floor, but that was as far as you could get before your knees finally gave up and caused your body to collapse to the concrete pavement, getting scraped against its rough surface.

You were in an awkward position, but you didn’t care. You were cold, you were wet, but most importantly… you were alone.

At least there was a positive side to that. You curled up, now being free to sob out all the pain that had piled up on you out to the distance. Your face became a mess of tears and snot, as the uncertainty of the situation dawned upon you.

“I can’t sleep on the streets… I’ve already been a burden to everyone, but I have to find someone, anyone…”

You had absolutely nothing, except for the clothes on your back and your phone in your pocket. Getting under the relative safety of a pillar, you decided to make use of that phone as you went through your contacts, pondering your slim set of options.

You remembered that there was one person who lived close enough to Kuroo, and this person was Kenma. Your fingers shook as you debated internally whether to press the call button or not. Kenma was the kind of person who was known for his preferences for being alone, and being sort of aloof towards others. 

It wasn’t likely that he would take you in, but the chance of him accepting was still there. At this point, you were ready to take any chance you got.

Trying not to drop your phone, you decided to take a risk and call Kenma. You put it on speaker and heard as the phone rang one time, two times…

Your phone provider would automatically drop a call if there wasn’t an answer by the fifth ring. The device’s battery was quite low as well, so if Kenma did not pick up, you truly would be stranded.

And so, you sat there awaiting your fate. Each ring, although lasting only a few seconds, stretched out for an eternity.

Would Kenma pick up? Would he not pick up?

Whichever one of the two happened, the little flame of hope left in your heart lay in his place… any place that was away from Kuroo.

“It really did turn out to be the person I loved most who ended up hurting me the deepest…” You thought alone to yourself, waiting as the phone rang and rang into the distance…

[stickers-on-a-laptop]

ooooohhhh i'd love your thoughts on blues and yellows??

let's goooooooooooooooooooo

sentai

kyoryuger: well we can't do that because kyoryuger doesn't have a yellow.

shinkenger: canonly the weirdo combi! i love them so much! let's let them have ideas forever and ever!

lupat: that time that they were not ever ever gonna be a family ever and then oops touma feels a bit like a dad and umika cares too and *starts sobbing*

gokaiger: while i don't ship it quite, wow they are in sync!! swords!!!!!! go my thief and ex-military man!!!

go-onger: wagh also fambily.... when all you want to do is save people and also go on a road trip...

zenkaiger: wasn't gaon mega racist to vroom, despite ALSO BEING KIKANOID. i don't remember a ton of interaction besides the racism

zyuohger: okay this is like canonly the biggest ship tease of everyone in the group and i surprisingly didn't hate it. but also i kinda ot6 it so i'm just odd over here in the cubes

jetman: ako should have gotten this man to enable her more, but also inoue clearly stopped caring about either of them

donbros: HI MY VIOLENCE BESTIES YOU CAN NEVER GET TOGETHER EVER WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THIS IS CANON WOOOOOOOOOOOOO LOVE TO SEE IT

kyuuranger: h-how much did spada and garu even interact. there was not enough spada and garu was too busy hanging off lucky's every word

king-ohger: remember that time they ship-teased us for a bit and then went "nvm wblue is the realest thing you've ever seen and non-binary lesbianism for the win"

toqger: tokacchi i am sorry but mio is a lesbian. you are in love with a lesbian. please consider bisexuality for yourself.

boonboomger: does not have a yellow.

boukenger: i really liked how well they worked together, but also it's not a combi i think much about

abaranger: i have. quite a few thoughts about yukito and ranru. i do not ship because i have eyes and can see yukito is a gay man. however. if he was gonna kiss a girl or had to share a bed with one. it would be ranru. it would never be emiri. also ranru stop calling him -san he is two years younger than you and doesn't deserve that respect he's an ass fjisoajfsioadfjdisaf

power rangers

rpm: imagine if they had expanded on flynn more. imagine.... they work well together tho! but like. i can definitely see summer with flynn harder than DILLON. anyways.

samurai: i do not remember them working together as much as ryuunosuke and kotoha? they're fine, i guess. mostly i remember the wiki claiming that emily is a tomboy and that they should have considered race a little harder there

dino charge: no yellow

overdrive: sorry to dax. like major apologies to dax. but i think ronny and SOUTA would be a really fun combi. like that'd be really fun. but dax and ronny were fine

dino thunder: they should have unionized against conner. (<- did not like conner).

[staawberru]

my childhood friend wrote a gay omegaverse faction about me! chapter 9

chapter one | next chapter | last chapter | masterlist

Your pov

    You followed Payton around long enough to find yourself at Abo High. It was the same school listed on Geo’s ID so you assumed you went there too, because what else could you do? There were a lot of gray people here, none as developed as Payton; the annoying girl, or Preston; the flirty boy. You sadly overheard them talking, even though it wasn’t that hard Payton was practically yelling. You still haven’t learned the quiet boy’s name who’s next to Preston, though. He looked uncomfortable, well you assumed he was, because he kept tensing up. 

    Geo was just following you like a lost puppy as you walked, it was kinda funny at first, but now it was just getting annoying. Like, has he ever heard of personal space? But, you guess he has a pass because he saved you. 

    “What are you doing out of school?” A voice boomed. Geez, way to burst your eardrums. You looked over and saw a buff gray man, dang he was big, and kinda menacing. He was yelling at Payton, and she didn’t even look at him, just walking past. 

     “Don’t ignore me you brat!” He yelled.

     “Remember who pays your bills!” She yelled back, over her shoulder. He stopped. That really worked? He just gave up? Damn, how rich is she? And what guard just gives up? You look over at him and he's back to standing idly at his post, unmoving and unblinking. 

    “Geo,” you asked, still watching the guard. He looked at you. “Is this our school?”

    “I’m not sure,” he whispered. His gaze drifted to the school in thought. You rolled your eyes. Well you and him are already here, there’s no point heading back into the city. 

     Thankfully the guard didn’t bother us when we went into the school, even though we were an extra five minutes late. Maybe he just hates Payton. Walking into the school was interesting, the hallway completely packed, like any normal high school, but everyone was making way for Payton like she was some type of leader. They were all gawking at her. Was she really that famous? Geo grabbed your hand, and your head snapped towards him.

     “What are you doing?” You asked, glared. He seemed to understand you didn’t like it, because he let you go. 

    “I’m sorry, you looked stressed.” He said, seemingly genuine enough. You looked at him, you wanted to get mad at him but you couldn’t. Were you stressed, angry, or confused? You didn’t like feeling like this, you hated it, but you do, and you can’t deny it anymore. God, you really hated this, you were so tired.

    “Don’t apologize,” you demand. You hate people who apologize for everything, it’s like a pet peeve. Jobie was like that. Well, before he went psycho anyway. You’d tell him to stop saying sorry multiple times, but of course he never listened.

    Maybe Geo reminds you of Jobie, in a good way of course. Maybe you liked having someone look up to you like Jobie. Maybe you miss Jobie? No, you don’t, you don’t miss someone who doesn’t listen when you tell him to stop. Never. It’s missing being the one in control, probably. Dang you don’t remember being this heavy. Or tired. Or the world being this wonky.

    “Hey, are you okay?” Geo asked. You look at him, or at least you think you do, your eyes are acting up a bit right now. Why wouldn’t you be okay? Why can’t you talk? Why are you moving? You're not telling yourself to move. Oh, now you're falling. 

-

    “Wake up,” Something padded your face. It felt soft. “Wake up,” you felt something heavy land on your chest. 

     “Ugh, come on fuckface, wake up.” Something… bit your elbow? And then bit it again. What the hell? The feeling stopped, maybe it was just your imagination. Whatever, you're just going back to sleep.

   “Don’t make me do it,” a voice called out. Okay, someone’s definitely there. You sit up and see a gray cat about to chomp down hard on your toe, tiny jaw wide open. It quickly stops, sitting up like nothing happened.

    “Oh you're up,” the cat says casually, like it hadn’t just been trying to eat your toe. It sat down and stared at you. You stared back. Why is the cat talking? What is happening? Oh, you must be dreaming. The cat stretched and walked up to you, still just staring. It looked a bit like the devil to be honest. You can’t place it, but something about it was sinister.

    “Oh! [last name],” a woman’s voice called out. “Are you doing alright? Do you still feel dizzy at all?” 

     “No?” You look at her, does she not notice the cat on the bed? Wouldn’t it be a health concern? 

     “She can’t see me [name],” the cat said. How does it know your name? She said your last name, so it doesn’t make sense?

    “Uh yeah I’m good, I’m good, I’m just going to go,” you got up. You look back at the cat. It was cleaning itself. Disgusting.

     “Oh, alright. Well, your friend is in the waiting room, meet up with him and go off to class ok?” She smiled, a tinge of concern in her expression. Friend? Oh, Geo, he waited for you? What a nice surprise. 

    “[name] are you ok?” Geo rushed over to you and hugged you. It was kinda weird, he seemed a bit different, somehow.

    “Yeah, okay,” you say awkwardly, peeling off his arms. He frowned. 

    “Um, well we should go to class,” you say. You don’t know your classes, but that doesn’t matter. There was something uncomfortable about what you’re feeling. Whatever.

    “Oh! Before you go, I have something for your parents to sign.” The nurse said, smiling. She handed you a letter, You eyed it suspiciously, but you took it. 

    “Come on Geo,” you walk away, accidentally slamming the door. The door opened again. Oops, you must have slammed the door on Geo's face. Oh well, you’re not going to apologize, it’s his fault for following you.

    The hallways all look the same, this sucks. All you want to do is get out of this godforsaken school. You don’t know if Geo was still following you, but that was honestly the least of your problems. The main problem is that damn letter.

     “[name]!” Geo panted. “You're going too fast!” You look back at Geo, he was a leap away. Sighing, you wait for him to catch up.

     “Gosh you're fast, also, where are you going?” He questions. 

     “Outside, hopefully,” you continue to walk.

     “Oh um, are you okay?” He asked.

     “Yes.”

     “Really?”

     “Of course I’m fucking fine,” you snap. You can’t deal with someone pestering you right now. This school is starting to suffocate you. 

    “[name],” Geo whispered. “Please talk to me about it.”

    “No,” you glare. You turn and continue to look for the exit to this giant fucking building. Once you turn around the corner, Geo's voice breaks the silence.

    “Oh come on angel, why do you keep running from me?” Geo smiled creepily. 

    “You know he’s never going to love you,” the cat said, cleaning his paw.

    “Oh, you're here,” he glared at the cat.

    “Of course I am, it’s my job to protect him, and that includes protecting him from you.” Geo rolled his eyes. 

     “I just don’t get it, he’s all over Geo but as soon as I come out to play he runs away like a little coward.” Geo frowned.

     “Maybe he recognizes what a shitty person you are.” 

     “Oh shut up, he loves me.”

     “Does he? Or is that just a delusion you tell yourself to make sure you don’t go completely insane.” The cat sat up. “Well I better go back to stalking him for your selfish desires.” 

       “I could delete you, cat.” He threatened.

      “Oh really? Who would do the stalking for you perv?”

      “I would.”

      “Oh and how has that turned out?” The cat smirked. “Just give his body back and I’ll do all the hard work, mmkay? You can just go back to lazing around.” The cat walked off towards your direction. Geo glared at him.

      “I could end you any day, you know that, cat?” Geo threatened. “And replaced you with a nice little dog, who doesn’t have the ability to talk back.”

      “Okay, you do that.” The cat rolled his eyes, stalking off.

[baddygab-bi]

Okay, episode thoughts:

First: glad they took the bachelor call from this episode so there was actually time for stuff. I see how it would’ve fit in, but I feel like all the stories this week were actually developed and we got that sneak for next time.

HenRen. I guessed the daughter thing. I’m happy they did this. Was it sorta weird to compare her to a dog? Yeah, but I get what the show was doing. I think the actress is a little cutie and from what we’ve seen and heard so far, she’s crushing it. Happy new addition to the 118 fam.

On the flip side. I believed the leaks, so I wasn’t shocked about the nun thing, but dear god it was even worse that I thought it would be.

I knew they building up a straight af Eddie, and it’s reached the point where I truly don’t think they’re going to walk it back. I know people are holding out hopes for a drunken buddie kiss at the bachelor party or a longing look at the wedding, but no. No. This episode was literally about not knowing who someone is, including yourself, and they used it to make sure people knew how much Eddie loves sex with his girlfriend, except when he can’t imagine her not as a nun (his dick was literally a factor in every single one of this scenes).

I love Buck and Tommy so much. Also I noticed that Lou had pierced ears and i love that for him. Anyway, I love their story rn and I really hope Tim decides to keep him around. Especially since Eddie and Marisol are end game, we need Buck with someone who’s good for him, and Tommy really seems like that person right now.

I didn’t love that neither Buck or Maddie had any clue about him being bi. I get Buck not realizing, but him saying he’s checked out a guy’s ass before as his only “gay thing” felt weird. Literally could’ve said he realized he might’ve had a crush on a high school friend, or got too into the football players on his team, or anything. Maddie could’ve had her little call backs to the time she joked about setting him and Josh up. I’m not saying they both had to know, but the fact that Buck was like “yeah, I had no clue” feels like they were purposely saying that for the audience or something. Like “I know, it came out of nowhere, but just roll with it.”

Bobby gives Eddie the worst advice. Or maybe the writers keep putting Eddie with the worst girls, who’s to say.

I saved a joke I made after seeing the leaks awhile ago: Here it is now, I want credit as the first person to make this joke a week ago:

“Marisol’s a nun? Wow, guess her only personality trait really is being a sister.”

Episode rating: 5/10. I loved HenRen, I loved Tevan. But the sexy catholic shit brought it down

[francesminos-tt]

A CuriousCat prompt fill of Joffron being half brothers. Warning: might not be the half brother you are thinking of.

Imagine this.

You were named after your gay dad’s ex, who was killed by a drunk driver on his way to attend the wedding of your gay dad and your bisexual mom. You never had the chance to really know your gay dad because he died shortly after you were born. You had two older brothers, who loved you very much and you loved them back, but you learned that the three of you might not be the biological children of your gay dad on your fifth birthday. You was so shocked that you knocked off your birthday cake and cried yourself to sleep that night. Not that you wanted to be the biological child of your gay dad or anything, but at least they could choose another day to tell you (To be fair, it was brought up by Uncle Aegon).

Your mom remarried shortly afterwards, giving you a very cool stepdad and two beautiful stepsisters from your stepdad’s previous marriage. You liked Daemon, and somehow, he liked you too. He treated you like his own, even after your two little half-brothers were born. You looked after Aeg and Vis, pleased that you were no longer the baby in the family. Your life was getting better, despite the dramatics of the whole biological/moral/legal dad thing. You were even comfortable enough to joke about it in school, and no one dared to mess with you because they were all scared of Daemon.

All things considered, Joffrey Velaryon Targaryen’s life was going pretty well. He was a freshman of King’s Landing College on a football scholarship, majoring in Computer Science (yes, he was not all muscle and no brain gym bro, thank you very much). He had made some friends in class and in football training, and if he wanted to brag, he could say that he was selected as the hottest new face on campus this year (the voting pool was suspiciously all male).

Everything looked so promising to Joffrey until he opened the front door of his family house on an ordinary Sunday morning and was greeted by a well-groomed middle-aged man with braided silver hair and a big smile.

“Joffrey! My boy! How you have grown!” The man swept Joffrey into a bear hug, his cologne almost suffocating the boy.

“Give him a break,” Rhaenyra rushed to save her son and tried to hide Joffrey’s tall figure behind her, “you are scaring him.”

“Mom?” Joffrey looked to his mother in confusion, his baseball cap knocked askew by the man’s powerful hug, “Who’s this? Your ex? Does he want money?”

“Joff, dear, listen.” Rhaenyra looked embarrassed, which was more than enough for Joffrey to worry, “No matter what I am about to say, know that I love you, okay?”

“You are scaring me, mom.” Joffrey said honestly.

“Well, this man is my ex…” Rhaenyra paused, taking a sharp inhale before revealing the shocking news, “husband. He’s your legal dad, Laenor Velaryon.”

“What?”

“That’s right, son.” Laenor tried to swing an arm over Joffrey’s shoulder, but the boy was too tall for him to do it, “Sorry for going awol for so long.”

“But you are supposed to be dead!” Joffrey said in disbelief, “Mom told me that you were drowned when surfing!”

“Really, Nyra? Drowned when surfing?” Now was Laenor’s turn to look surprised, “Me? An Olympic level surfer?”

“What else am I supposed to tell him, Laenor? That you fucked off to Essos with your lover?”

“Hey, it was a mutual agreement. I leave, and you can marry Daemon.”

“Well, yes, but at least you could come up with your own excuse.” Rhaenyra rolled her eyes. They were bickering like a pair of old ladies who had known each other for life.

“Mom, care to explain?” Joffrey turned to Rhaenyra with a raised eyebrow, “Please don’t tell me my whole life is a lie.”

It turned out far worse than that. Joffrey, who had believed he was the son of Laenor and Rhaenyra until he was five, and then was told that in fact he was not Laenor’s son. He had believed for his whole 19 years of life that though he had never met his biological father, he had a mother who loved him very much, but this belief proved wrong today when he was revealed another shocking news about his parents.

“So you are saying, I am actually the child of dad and Mr. Harwin? Like, I am the genetic offspring of two men and you are just my surrogate mother?” Joffrey summed up the 30-minute speech he had just been told with a tone so calm that it worried Rhaenyra.

“I carried you in my body for 10 months, Joff. You are every bit of my son as well as theirs.” Rhaenyra made the boy sit down and cradled his head, “Nothing has changed, okay? If you don’t want to see your dad, I can kick him out right away. I will make sure he never shows up in front of you again if you so wish.”

The thing was, Joffrey didn't know what to wish. He always envied Jace and Luke, because not only did they remember Laenor, they had also spent several summer holidays with Mr. Harwin, who was supposed to their biological father, while Joffrey knew no father except Daemon. He had made peace with that, but the shocking news just made his will dissolve like bubbles in the sun.

“Why is he here?” Joffrey asked Rhaenyra as if he were a grumpy little boy who was determined not to look at Laenor.

“Son, I am sorry that I have been away, but trust me, it was the best way we could come up with at the time. The marriage between me and your mother was never a happy one, and you will be far better off having Daemon as a father figure than me.” Laenor spoke; he actually sounded wise this time, “I am not here to destroy your life. Consider me an addition. You can have another adult to talk to or rant at whenever you want. Hey, guess what? I can be your cool uncle, or dad, or pops, or anything else you want to call me.”

“He has some business to discuss here.” Rhaenyra told him gently, “Don't worry. He won’t stay with us. He’s just been bugging me about when he can see you, so I let him visit for a bit.”

“I would get a huge inheritance, a large seaside house and a hot half-sibling if it were a romcom movie.” Joffrey murmured, still burying his face in his mother’s bosom, but he didn't sound too distressed. He had seen enough drama in this house to be distressed by this anyway.

“Well, about that…”

————————————————————————

It turned out, Joffrey’s life was not a romcom. It was a twisted soap drama with too many coincidences to justify shit writing. For example, he learned that the business Laenor had in King’s Landing was actually getting official custody of his other mysterious son who he had left at a sept.

“You left your son at a sept? What kind of fucked up father are you?” Joffrey was so furious that he could punch Laenor’s handsome face with his bare fist.

“I had no choice! Joffrey threatened to break up with me! Not you, dear, Joffrey Lonmouth.” Laenor lifted both his hands as a surrender, “And the child’s mother didn't want him. It was a teenager mistake. I made sure to leave enough money for him!”

“He’s still going to foster care no matter how much money you left in his cradle.” Joffrey said coldly, “You can at least be a man and look after him yourself. Perhaps you and mom wouldn't even have to marry if you already had a son.”

“I know, I am a dick.” Laenor sighed, pinching his own nose bridge, “I contacted the sept where I left him, and found out that he was adopted for a while but his adopting family hasn’t really been taking care of him, so I decided to step up and be a man this time. That’s why I am here.”

“A bit too late for that.” Joffrey commented.

“I know.” Laenor replied, “I don't need redemption, but I want to make amends. I want to make amends with you too, Joffrey. I am so sorry that I have been absent all your life.”

“It sounds like your other son needs you more than me. You should start with him.” Joffrey said.

Laenor looked disappointed, because Joffrey’s words seemed like a rejection. However, as the boy‘s mother, Rhaenyra could tell that Joffrey had already forgiven Laenor. He was just too proud and stubborn to admit it.

Laenor promised that he would keep Joffrey updated with the legal process, and he did. Rhaenyra helped him find a lawyer and even attended the hearing as a character witness. The process went smoothly, and Laenor finally got full custody with the son he barely knew. Joffrey was happy for him, really, but his happiness was ruined when Laenor brought this boy to the Rhaenyra’s house to officially introduce him to the family.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” Joffrey murmured to himself. It was supposed to be a whisper, but the room was so quiet that everyone heard him loud and clearly, including Aeg and Vis.

“Language, Joff!” Rhaenyra warned him, while Daemon just let out a sharp laugh.

“It’s okay, mom. We are not kids anymore, right, Aeg?” Viserys, who just celebrated his 14th birthday, winked at his 16 year-old brother.

Aegon just shrugged, too busy fiddling with his phone.

Joffrey didn't hear his mother’s warning at all. He just kept staring at this newcomer, a tall and handsome young man roughly Jace’s age, with well-groomed silver curls and a pair of light violet eyes. He wore a knit vest over a shirt, paired with jeans, casual but not too casual, relaxed but not too slack, a perfect balance between youthful and proper. He was relatively toned, if the veins on his forearm was any indication, yet he looked bookish at the same time with a pair of glasses on his nose. Just Joffrey’s type.

“You look familiar,” Lucerys commented after a while, “hey, Joff, is this the guy you disappeared with at the party?”

Joffrey tried to cover Lucerys’s mouth, but it was too late. The cat had already been out of the box.

“Disappear with?” Jace asked.

“Party?” Rhaenyra mirrored her eldest son’s frown.

Daemon laughed harder.

Joffrey didn't know what got him at this moment, but his first reaction was to jump up from his chair and took a hold of the guy’s collar, dragging him upstairs to his room and shutting the door with a loud bang.

“What the fuck?!” Joffrey shoved the guy against the wall, his fist inches away from the guy’s handsome face.

“Hello to you too.” The guy had the audacity to smile, “I wasn’t expecting such a warm welcome, Joffrey.”

“You fucking knew!” Joffrey was about to punch the guy but his fist was stopped by a large and calloused palm, and the next thing he knew, their position was reserved. Now Joffrey was the one being pinned against the wall.

“You seem to only know how to say fuck today.” The guy said, tilting Joffrey’s chin up, “Are you this eager, baby? Is that why you dragged me to your room?”

“Cut the crap, Daeron.” Joffrey spat, “We’ve been fucking for what, months now? And you have never, not even once, mentioned you are my gay dad’s accidental child. How dare you!”

Daeron chuckled, one hand on Joffrey’s chin and the other roaming down the boy’s torso.

“What difference will it make?” Daeron said with a flat tone, “I never lied to you. I told you that I was brought up in a church, and adopted by a religious family before they decided to send me away to Old Town. I never felt I belonged there. I ran away as soon as I turned 18, and have been working at the bar we met ever since.”

“I thought it was your lame pickup line.” Joffrey admitted before he could stop himself.

“And who believed my lame pickup line?” Daeron couldn’t help but lean in to kiss away the small pout on Joffrey’s lips, “You are so spoiled, Joffrey. You never know what it feels like when life deals you a shitty hand.”

“Fuck you.” Joffrey tried to bite Daeron’s tongue, but the damn blonde was so quick that he failed to catch it on time, “You don't know me at all.”

“Oh, but I do know you, little brother.” Daeron licked his lips like predator in front of a prey, “I know you so well that I want to destroy you. How come you have a loving mother, a wealthy stepdad, siblings who care about you, a biological dad who wants to beg for your forgiveness, a full scholarship, a nice life and everything, while I have been neglected my whole life?”

Joffrey had no words to say to that. He realized that he was indeed lucky, when Daeron put it like that, but he didn't take anything from anyone to achieve this. He could not be punished for being lucky.

“Joffrey? Is everything all right?” Rhaenyra’s voice came through the door with a soft knock, “Don’t do anything stupid, okay? We can work this out.”

“Listen to her. We can work this out, can't we, little brother?” Daeron chuckled as his hand came down to Joffrey’s groin, “I’ve heard that siblings tend to be attracted to each other. I guess that’s why we are so compatible in bed, aren’t we?”

Joffrey hadn't realized until this moment that he had been fucking his half-brother for months now.

Fuck, he was so screwed.