#im such an internet grandma sometimes tho lol

[chaotictomtom]

thanks @egirlgarak for tagging me!!

tagging anyone who wants to do this hehe im too shy to tag ppl smh

Were you named after anyone?

only one of my middle deadnames lol, my grandma italian's name she had to change when getting to France. adam came from seeing cool ppl with that name + movie with hugh dancy getting me to finally pick it. i mean i DID a strawpoll on twitter back then to help me choose lol. so not really after anyone ig technically. thomas was given to me by people calling me this name umprompted even before i came out to myself so like. alright will keep it I GUESS random people in my life chose it for me

When was the last time you cried?

ppl say T will make you unable cry and....prob depends on the person. i still do cry seeing videos of cute dogs getting groomed and seeing general good in life and people 👍 so i think it was 2 days ago watching daily dose of internet last vid cos a bit about a kid trying to make friends made me tear up lol. humanity.....<333333 cries like a baby instantly

Do you have kids?

if da bébé (cat) counts yes. but no.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

i don't think! a lot! but i guess i do use it sometimes. more irl tho i just realised i never really use it online in case it doesn't read as sarcasm. mibbe when i rant in the tags on my own posts tho lol

What sports do you play/have you played?

played a bunch of different sports during my school years but it's been years of not doing anything and it's a struggle between thinking how my knee can suddenly fuck up and needing exercise to be healthy </3

What's the first thing you notice about someone?

i honestly don't know............. ig i try are they. like not a cunt and a bigot. can i exist without them thinking im out of line by just. being me fdhglkjhdflkjd. also. do they think im funneyyy >:)

Eye color?

light brown. i think

Scary movies or happy endings?

not picky i like em all 👍

Any special talents?

that pepe silvia scene with charlie kelly but it's me linking everything to Die Hard. not kidding. it's a curse i could think "pff no way what im watching rn is linked in any way to Die Hard" and i can while saying that already do the mental exercice to link the two things. everything is fucking linked to these movies. even bands. mcr! weird al! talking heads!!! movie/tvshow is easier to link up to Die Hard but still anyway been thinking abt doing twitch stream abt this for years now. like that wikipedia speedrun game thing but. mmm die hard......

Where were you born?

South-ish east of France, didn't live there long at all was a babey when we left to get further south 👍👍👍

What are you hobbies?

movies 👍 tvshows 👍 music 👍 im so original ik. i like to draw too!!!! computer stuff yumyum!!!! viddie games 👍👍👍👍

Do you have any pets?

How tall are you?

da bébé (basically garfied if he slayed more + had longer hair)

</3333333333 like 5'2. jerma voice why are u short because god doesn't fucking love me that's why

Favorite subject in school?

honestly don't remember much </3 ig art back in middle school. and i liked learning about everything we had but highly depended on the teachers + class too. learning is fun!!!! not in france's school system tho

Dream job?

scary question..................... currently having a "realistic" work project (very long term) to be a cyber café owner!!!! but capitalism wasn't a thing i guess would like to do my shit, drawing and creating other things to trade for other things................ wanted to work in space as a kid so ig this too

[dreamofbona]

thanks so much @mrsandypants for this i love interacting. somehow i just saw it - i'm truly such an internet grandma sometimes - but anyways...

name: a

fav color: blue

fav band/artist: enhypen, bts, wonho, txt (i also love tpst and svt but these are the main artists i like)

last movie: i honestly don't know lol i mostly watch k-dramas or youtube

last show: extraordinary attorney woo

when i made the blog: october '21 i believe

what i post: incorrect enha quotes, rants about my faves

other blogs: i have a side-blog related to tempest but it's dead

do i get asks: not really, but if any of yall ever wanna talk to me go ahead i love interacting

followers: there's 142 of yall thank you to each and every single one of you<3

dream trip: italy

top five fav songs:

Shout Out - ENHYPEN

Foreshadow - ENHYPEN

Shadow - SEVENTEEN

Close - Wonho

Heartbeat - BTS

tag game ✨️

Oh my goodness you cutie patoot! Thank you so much for the tag @feeling-woozi . Your posts have been such a highlight on my feed so seeing you tag is so cute. Thank you precious pumpkin!!!

name: Andy

sign: Libra ♎

height: 4'10" / 149ishh cm

time: 23:20 (ET)

birthday: October 18th

favorite band/artist: Seventeen / SF9 / Enhypen / Tempest (Sorry to my other Ults, I love them SO dearly but I go so far as to collect for these boys... So I suppose they are my ult of ults)

last movie: I believe it would be 'Death on the Nile'. I watched it with some of my mates on discord... But it has been a hot minute since I've seen a film honestly...

last show: Coffee Melody I suppose. But this changes on the daily as I try to keep up with a lot of my dramas as they come out. 😅

when i created this blog: Sometime in 2020-ish... But this isn't my first blog... I've been pretty back and forth when I was younger but that's to be expected I suppose. 😅

what i post: Kpop (My ults mostly) / Thai BLs / Dramas in general in that order I suppose. My original posts will mostly be my kpop ultis though!

other blogs: This is my only blog now! I've since abandoned (aka forgot the passwords/accounts for) my others many moons ago and honestly I'm more than comfortable here as is!

do i get asks: Rarely, but honestly I'd love to just have a chat via Asks / DMs any time. I do enjoy squee-ing with those that share similar interests!

followers: 31 lovelies 😊

average hours of sleep: 4 to 8 depending on a work week

instruments: Bass / Acoustic guitar

what i'm wearing: Red flowy tank / Black 3 quarter sleeve high-low top / black scrub bottoms (I have a lot of scrubs as a nursing student and they are comfy... Pfft)

dream job: An active brewer cicerone / A private practice nurse / Travel nurse. A job where I don't see nearly as many people but can provide *INDIVIDUAL* care to others... I'm not funny or so, and I have terrible anxiety but the thing that makes me happiest is making others comfortable / happy. That's all I want from life honestly.

dream trip: I'd love to at least visit Thailand and S.Korea within my lifetime. Ideally with my partner or a friend.

favourite songs: According to my Spotify the top 5 are Anyone (Seventeen) / Given-Taken [JP Version] (Enhypen) / Fanfare (SF9) / BTBT (B.I) / Devil (Max Changmin)

Tagging: Okay now sweet peas, I would love to hear from some of my close mutuals - @maklineluv & @musicalgrl . ------- But also if these lovelies I follow would be down, I would love to see your replies... (Of course, do not feel like you need to! I just really appreciate your blogs!! So at this point, just take it as me low key saying I adore you. Don't feel the need to reply!) @jaywoninthespotlight / @liyazaki / @myboyfriendjake / @heesplanet

[spacejew]

oops accidental personal post I guess

It's weird that I almost feel the need to go here to personal blog again because of a handful of irl friends following what was supposed to be a private personal Twitter in theory, just for like, idk, internet strangers and friends I made online not those imported from meatspace. Also those character limits... Suffocating.

Anyways yeah things are kinda stable but dissapointing lifewise? I'm definitely in a rut and stuck somewhere I'm desperately trying to get out of. Also like. idk. Gender shit. I think I really fucked myself over hard when I made the decision a few years back to conviously bottle up all my dysphoria and trans feelings and bury them and repress them hard and just live as a very gay and feminine bi boy and like. hm. I think I've been happy since? But im thinking now that maybe. Because that's still a part of my psyche that haunts me every day. I might actually have been mildly depressed this whole time and like, still struggling to make important life decisions because of the anxiety of that. Idk. Maybe if I got a therapist and realistic attention to that all those years ago and it turned out to be very real n legit and i got to make tough choices and live my truth, I would be equipped now to actually be joyful and able to fully focus on hard work and taking risks and putting myself out there and being successful and shit. Idk idk idk. I just have to wonder if all this time I've actually been quite unhappy and filling the void with dumb shit and a good deal of dissociation and complacency. Idk. what I'm saying is maybe I made a big mistake there lmao and could've started transitioning, if that's right for me, 4-7 years ago maybe, who knows. Haha so fun. Fuck me. Big Regrets, lads. But also I still don't know if that's right. Which probs means it is who am I kidding. Oof. But it's ok life is a journey I'm full of wise shit and I know it's not the end of the world. It just kinda. Makes me so sad on behalf of the old me who would cry so much because of dysphoria and living in this body in this life. She knew. I don't know why I buried her alive like that. Anyways.

I spent all year struggling to make an animated short (which ended up being kinda long tbh like 10 minutes?) by myself mostly, just me and my mental blocks and executive dysfunction and shit, but I was v passionate about it and worked hard and got to actually bring a whole vision to life, with basically nobody to tell me what to do, just give me feedback that I wasn't obligated to follow. It came out pretty nice and I'm very happy that I got to tell exactly the story I wanted and try a cool new look and I just wish I gave myself more time to work on the actual animation part but I put my heart and endless weeks and months of refinement into the storyboarding and script and every little detail and I really feel accomplished and like it paid off -- and I even got to do a private screening at my summer camp job that I was called in to do one more time at the last minute right when I finished my film, it was a miracle and so perfect, everyone cried and truly loved it and felt touched by it. And then I went to animation festivals! And all this cool shit! But... I haven't been able to figure out a public screening thing yet. And I feel like all my excitement is gone now. And I really wanted to polish the look and some backgrounds a little, just some very quick rerendering and comp, but. I feel like too much time has passed, i just feel dissapointed. I haven't put it online yet cause I haven't done my public screening, cause of my stupid anxiety about little details and overall idk imposter syndrome I guwss I feel more ashamed of it than proud of it even tho it's probably good, and like I feel that everyone was excited to support me but probably nobody cares anymore.

Basically I had all the wind taken out of my sails. Oh and right when I was trying to get it off the ground I guess and push through, my grandma died. I'm so heartbroken I loved her so fucking much and. She never got to see the film cause of my stupid bullshit. I feel so bad about that. So so bad. Ugh. And it's a film very very hilariously blatantly directly based on me and my feelings and my real family history, ultimately besides other main themes it's about talking to your grandparents and family about the past and your current feelings. And in it the main character, a girl, cough cough even though it's basically me, cough cough go figure, gender shit, anyways the climax is her going back in time to talk to her great grandma, and it's very emotional and my best friend of like almost 10 years now composed and recording a music for that scene for me. And now when I eventually screen this, my entire family and also myself is gonna get torn to shreds by this scene more than intended because my own fucking grandma, who I was excited to show this film to more than anyone on earth, passed so unexpectedly without seeing it. Fuck. Why didn't I send it to her when she was in the hospital? Obviously cause if I did that that would make it real and she wouldn't get better and all I do is live in denial. Ugh. Anyways yeah. The point is I'm stagnant and in a rut right now and just want to move forward and focus on making new work and just get a real career relevant job already. Tough year hit a well needed high and now petering off back into misery. Not to be dramatic. I'm ok tbh I have a part time I'm slowly getting sick of and a loving supportive partner and some very good friends, tho not as many as I used to see regularly and that's kinda sad too. That's your 20s babey.

I just need to move on and make big changes. My pattern rn is like. Work fri-sun, if I'm lucky I get to hang out with friends or lovers, usually at least with my partner. on monday I recover from working. on tuesday I have dnd and usually get some stuff done but honestly just catch up on warframe with my clan friends. wednesday my partner and I got to the park and library for half the day and eat and draw and talk. on thursday I mentally prepare for work again and usually we go out to play another roleplaying game with her roommates friends. a lot of that free time that's been left unmentioned is spent being over at bae's sometimes so I don't have the ability to get much work done. Lately I've spent most of my time planning a dnd campaign which is fun but also too stressful on account of obviously I'm not playing it yet so like what's the point, sorry friends who have patiently waited for months for me to be ready to start the game for them. And also like. Yeah idk. just sad and confused and resting my weary heart and body after a very rough month after my grandma passed. But! I did accomplish a very crazy deep cleaning of my room. I threw out 14 bags of shit at the least. I wish I weighed it all, it was a lot. I feel so much more organized and cleansed from that. For the record I didn't have any trash in my room, nor was it every a mess. Just every single cabinet and drawer was crammed full of stuff and I guess I hoarded a lot of shit. I was able to throw away a lot of things I held on to be cause of sentimentality and I'm proud of myself for growing that way. So like. Idk. It's not all bad, baby steps. I still feel like I'm constantly improving as a person! I'm positive, optimistic. Just tired, anxious, and feel bad.

Also I finally got a new phone and because of my hubris I dropped it without a case and it shattered only two weeks in. The day I was gonna buy a case. But it's ok. Story of my life I guess. I can't keep everything pristine and polished forever, one day shit falls and breaks but it's still usable. It has character.

I wasn't expecting to dump everything like this, sorry yall. Thanks for reading I guess. Also I forgot how to do a read more on mobile lol sorry

[lovveecat]

rules: answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

I was tagged by @notwvrriors ♡

— what was your last…

1. drink:: juice

2. phone call:: my grandma

3. text message:: “did i send u that cover i found of aint it fun??”

4. song you listened to:: Bye Bye Bye - Further Seems Forever (cover)

5. time you cried:: 2 days ago? i think

— have you ever…

6. dated someone twice:: nope

7. kissed someone and regretted it:: hahaha no

8. been cheated on:: hAH no

9. lost someone special:: yep

10. been depressed:: ye

11. gotten drunk and thrown up:: HAH NO

— fave colours

12. pastel yellow

13. peach

14. pastel mint

— in the last year have you…

15. made new friends:: yep!

16. fallen out of love:: i mean idk if I was “in love” but yeah sure

17. laughed until you cried:: Y E S

18. found out someone was talking about you:: nope (maybe?? idk it might just be me being paranoid but I thought I heard something and it made me really hHh)

19. met someone who changed you:: i dont think so

20. found out who your friends are:: yeah ;-;

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list:: lmao who uses facebook ((imsorryijust))

— general

22. how many your facebook friends do you know irl:: sorry i’m not outdated,,,

23. do you have any pets:: YES AND I LOVE HIM

24. do you want to change your name:: no but I won’t present myself with my “real” name on the internet/youtube

25. what did you do for your last birthday:: escape room with some friendies

26. what time did you wake up today:: around 6:50? i think

27. what were you doing at midnight last night:: trying to sleep (but i cant but i cant when you all have,,, gUns for hAnds, Y E A)

28. what is something you can’t wait for:: FOB CONCERT AND LEAVING SCHOOL AND MEETING MY INTERNET FRENS AND THE NEXT TIME PALAYE COMES TO CANADA

29. what is your favourite animal:: foxes!!! and hedgies

30. what are you listening to right now:: buzzfeed unsolved

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom:: i don’t think so nah

32. something that’s getting on your nerves:: my school friends

33. most visited website:: google probably

34. hair colour:: dark dark brown

35. long or short hair:: i have long hair but it’s frizzy/curly so it’s kinda short-ish. I’m gonna cut it and straighten it tho so it has that kinda vinatge 1950s style

36. do you have a crush on someone:: crush?? crushcrushcrush??? the bop by paramore??? ((i dont think so but honestly feelings are too complicated so i kinda just ignore mine))

37. what do you like about yourself:: i’m a pretty good artist?

38. want any piercings:: maybe but probably nah

39. blood type:: idk(how)

40. nicknames:: nixotine, nix, idk if this counts but violette

41. relationship status:: s i n g l e ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

42. sign:: (i’m the new) cancer

43. pronouns:: she/her

44. fave tv show:: dirk gently!! asoue!! doctor who!! b99!!

45. tattoos:: dont have any but have LOTS of plans

46. right or left handed:: right handed!

47. ever had surgery:: nop

48. piercings:: ears but im p sure they’re closed now

49. sport:: i used to do gymnastics and ice skating. I still like to ice skate sometimes and i’m trying to learn to rollerskate

50. vacation:: i’ve always wanted to travel across europe!! and also go to japan!! and back to disney lol

51. trainers:: ??

— more general

52. eating:: quoi?

53. drinking:: qui?

54. i’m about watch:: probably gravity falls

55. waiting for:: my friend to say if we’re going to see panic! or nah

56. want:: to meet my favs (and give them so much love!!!)

57. get married:: idk if i want to but if i do i have ideas

58. career:: (concert) photographer or own a bakery or design merch

— which is better

59. hugs or kisses:: hugs (probably)

60. lips or eyes:: eyessss

61. taller or shorter:: taller? i don’t really care

62. older or younger:: idk? younger?

63. nice arms or stomach:: idc???

64. hookups or relationships:: relationships!!

65. troublemaker or hesitant:: troublemaker? but if they’re being an actual bad person then n a h

— have you ever

66. kissed a stranger:: nope

67. drank hard liquor:: nope

68. turned someone down:: no? i don’t believe so

69. sex on first date:: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA N O P E

70. broken someone’s heart:: hopefully not!

71. had your heart broken:: maybe?

72. been arrested:: nope

73. cried when someone died:: almost ((a book character))

74. fallen for a friend:: y e p

— do you believe in

75. yourself:: yea!

76. miracles:: it’s possible, but is it plausible?

77. love at first sight:: oR SHOULD I WALK BY AGAIN YOURE PHOTOGENICALLY DRESSED THE CONVERSATION BEGINS OH GO-

((no, you can find someone attractive as hell but maybe not actual love))

78. santa claus:: st nicholas? sure. santa who travels around the world? idk probably not

79. angels:: did you mean tyler joseph? did you mean josh dun? did you mean geoff wigington??????????

— misc

80. eye colour:: brownnn

81. best friend’s name:: awsten hater 2k18, hannah, gabrielle (kinda),

82. favourite movie:: LOVE, SIMON

83. favourite actor:: dont have one?

84. favourite cartoon:: GRAVITY FALLS, SU, CAMP CAMP

85. favourite teacher’s name:: iT starts with a K but i forgot how to spell it cuz it wasn’t commonnNnnsnsjajjzks

I tag: @hint--of--red @scolarin @hottopic @yalocaltransboi @existential-greenbeans @crankthatfrank @underscoregeoff @awwwsten @panicwithryan @howrydenprobablybrokeup @happypandaparade

[thegeminisage]

26, 30, 34, 44

26. Ever form any gaming rivalries?

nnnnnnnot really? like, rivalries as in my faction is better than yours? nah bc i dont play mmos. or, my fav game is better than yours? nah bc why fight, lets all enjoy them all. i guess the closest i ever came was when i was playing ffxi (mmos are still cursed, trust me i’d know, not just that one, all of them) & like we would get real heated towards & dismissive of WoW players for some reason lol

30. How many consoles do you own?

ok this is gonna make me sound like im a millionaire but just keep in mind i (we, together, my brother and me) got most of these as kids/teenagers and/or saved up for them together as a dual effort, and almost never resold them bc then u can’t play the old games anymore. games you resell. consoles u don’t, especially the special edition ones. that being said, i have:

n64

gamecube (nes special edition)

wii u

gameboy advance sp (nes special edition)

regular DS (honestly woulda sold it but: zelda special edition...)

3DS (zelda special edition)

ps2

ps3

ps4

sega genesis

i used to have a ps1, but we did sell that because the ps1 has a ps1 INSIDE IT, who needs ps1! and then we also used to have a nes & snes, but we traded them to my cousin for the sega bc my AUNT had them both too & we were over at her place all the time...but honestly? it was stupid, bc we couldn’t find any games for it we liked in stores (this was long after they stopped making games for both but before internet shopping was a big thing - back then the widespread belief was you were setting yourself up to have your CC info stolen). i also used to have a wii and xbox 360, but my brother took the wii, ps3, and xbox 360 with him when he left, and left me the older consoles in exchange. eventually i got a wii u as a chr*stmas gift (and it has a wii in it) and my brother gave me back the ps3 because i was pining for it constantly. never did get to play my old skyrim file again tho. ):

34. Do either of your parents play video games?

my mom just plays puzzle stuff like tetris and dr mario, but her mom, my grandma, used to be like...a genuine talent at pinball. then ofc my dad loved to play on the NES, especially kid icarus, but sometimes zelda too - he’d sit me in his lap back when i was still teething and let me hold the other controller so i’d “think” i was playing :’) he probably really would have loved the new kid icarus.

44. Arcade machine that has consumed the most of your quarters?

DDR, easily. playing that in public is such a fucking high. if you’re even halfway decent you can attract a small audience who think you’re the coolest shit they’ve EVER seen. runner-up is the old classics like pacman, galaga, donkey kong, digdug, etc. there’s something really cool about being able to play those in their original formats. THIRD runner up is racing games that i’m familiar with from home consoles - so mario kart, f-zero. man i havent been to an arcade in years i’d really like to go back

[chilipepperflake]

Get To Know Me!

Tagged by @fruitynamjoon !! Love ya bud

Relationship status: single


Favorite color: red!!


Lipstick or chapstick: lipstick is pretty but it gets all over literally everything


Last song I listened to: Danger by BTS


Last movie watched: Mosquita y Mari


Top three shows: right now im watching Cowboy Bebop, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Voltron!


Top Three Characters: i like spike, giles, and keith ^^ from their respective shows above lol


Last book read: i havent read a full-length book since Parable of the Sower last semester, i did read The Speckled Band from the Sherlock Holmes series last week tho


One hobby: i dont.... do much lmao, i guess singing? And cooking, i like making stuff from random recipes i find on the internet


Favorite time of day: im most productive around 7 or 8 pm, but i like just chilling around 8/9 am outside somewhere on the days i dont have class


Coffee shop/Cafe shop order: iced coffee, sometimes a latte if im feeling fancy XD


Favorite childhood movie: the road to el dorado


Favorite tumblr coloring trend: im not sure what this is about lmao, i like those aesthetique gifsets w the crazy neon colors tho 👌🏼


Favourite Holiday and why: christmas! Its a whole month off school, and everyone comes over to my moms house and we play mario party and loteria^^ plus my grandma makes posole :0 highkey the best holiday

I tag: @mydailycraziness7 , @ayllx , @bennieandthejosh , @shironyane , @mlentertainment , @somewhereinmyowngalaxy , and @mishimaphanboy ! ( ﾟヮﾟ)

[former-cannibal-3]

Tell us about how you got into art.

WOW this got super long, I’m so sorry!

I was given a metric assload of coloring books, glitter crayons and stuff by my grandma when I was a kid. I don’t remember ever starting, it’s just always been like that. Also I really liked Pokemon, like REALLY liked it, like any other small child in the 90s. So I had some established characters to draw, like pikachu and eevee! Those were my fave to draw. Any I just never really stopped.

Luckily my elementary school still had an “art class” back then. For one whole year it had an actual room, but then it was just a little cart pushed around. Nothing really groundbreaking, but since it was fun and I liked it (and was proud of being “better” than everyone else there) it just kept going.  it was really just a bunch of kids scribbling stuff with very little direction.

My art tteacher gave me a book about drawing things realistically. I really read that book and took it all to heart. Except for the grid thing, I thought the grid thing was stupid because all it let you do was COPY a photo, and I didn’t WANT to COPY! I wanted to make my OWN stuff!

I dont remember, but I think it was in first grade, maybe before that? Maybe after idk but it was really early on. I wrote stories about a wolf who’s name was Fear, and she was a pup when the forest she lived in burned down, and she got separated from her pack. So she ended up having to traverse the desert and run into other packs who wanted to use her in different ways (usually as a disposable labor or to watch the pack’s pups while their mothers went to have fun and stuff like that) and she would have to fight them to keep going. And so on. It was pretty in depth but I never actually got them on paper except for some shitty doodles.

Here’s a quick rendition of her from memory I made just now, using some free lineart. It’s probably missing some aspects of her design, but the main thing was that she is orange, had the dark stripe, and a white tail-tip. I know, looks like a fox. Of course my actually drawings of her were crude and done in crayon.

I really liked wolves. A Lot. So Much. I guess that’s probs why I’m a furry?

Similar to that time, like at the same time as Fear, I was makign my own TCG based on my own pet-sim website (heavily inspired by neopets and one gem-creature that i think was on a yugioh card). I made a “functioning” website in front page, it really just made me happy to click through on the previews and do pointless stuff that didn’t actually DO anything because it wasn’t a live website. But it was cool and fun. I made a lot of websites on front page lol. A LOT.

I made custom buttons and graphics in Paint and just came up with all this shit to “do” and ran with it. I also made some sites that were like, just really bad personal homepages. But I was also like somewhere between the ages of 7-11, I don’t remember what age specifically? BUT anyway frontpage is really fun to work with and I basically know all of my HTML and CSS from that and neopets.

What’s really funny is… I never had a home computer! I didn’t have computer until like 2009, and we still didn’t have internet at home until like 2013-ish. I might be off on those dates a bit but you can’t expect me to remember specifics when I struggle to remember things that happened yesterday lol.

Oh yeah I found Jay Naylor art and a comic called Good Cheese and accidentally got into furries bc of it, and yeah some of it was porn and my POOR LITTLE CHILD BRAIN COULDNT HANDLE bahahahahaa im fucking kidding, it WAS porn but it’s cool and I don’t think it really damaged me. I thought it was ~wrong~ but I still printed that shit out in black and white after school to take home with me oops.

Like RIGHT after that I got into Redwall and Serenity Rose. Redwall has this huge roleplay community online, it was really cool. i never had the guts to RP tho, so I just looked at pretty art and tried to emulate it. I made my own OCs and stuff. With Sera Rose I entered my first foray into online forums, the Bubblegum Noir. Where I posted doodles I did. I was also a really fucking obnoxious teenager lol. This was middle school bee tee dubbs.

Sometime in middle school I think my focus shifted a bit from my self-driven and pokemon fuel’d vigor for creating things. I certainly still drew fanart, I got really into anime (kinda, i read loveless and then was smitten by cat eared boys forever after that lol) and started drawing Neopets related stuff by then. (Yes I still plaid neopets in middle school, hush.) I think I scanned some art in to enter into the beauty contest.

Uhm in middle school I was introduced to all sorts of New Cool Tools like BRUSH PENS and stuff! WOAH! But yeah I actually tried to do shit for realsies. I did stain glass cutting and silk screen printing after school. Neato!

In middle school I also had a “running” comic I called My Life Unlimited, and it was like the bizzare megatokyo-esque thing where I drew me and my friends having everyday normal lives. Except my cat was Literally Satan. No I mean like actually, Satan was on vacation in the Real World disguised as a cat, but OFC I found him and was like oh no a poor lost kitty, let me put a collar on him and take him home n feed him. Which, as we all know collars = ownership and eating the food of the land etc etc. Which lead to me owning Satan, literally, who could shift inbetween cat form and human-ish-looking form. Also he couldn’t open the peanut butter once and it became a running joke.

There was this whole plot with angels and demons or whatever and the demons were the good guys and angels were generally manipulative assholes and uhhhh yeah. It was dorky but I liked it. Still kinda do. I dated a “fox demon” in the comic, he had a scythe, it was cool. B3

And uh, I just drew a lot of fanart, fancharacters. My own comic stuff. 

And then I dropped all of it in high school, where I only drew furries and school assigned artwork. It was neato, the only thing I learned was about negitive space, lineart quality and VAGUELY hue and value (but not terribly in detail, and it was muddy and mucky). I made an FA account, found artists like CorrieZodori and ForcesWerwolf, and joined the Hungry Pokemon Forums (as a minor and completely ignoring ALL the rules about being 18 or over.) WHOOPS guess I was into vore. No wait, I joined HPF in… middle school I think? IDEK.

Anyway I started drawing MORE furries and more maws. And back then I was like “only oral vore, mawshots or pre-vore, no stomach internals and NO DIGESTION” but look at me now mom, if it aint Dying I ain’t Buying.

Lots of highschool is a blue of bad decisions and general fuckery. I had a cool AP art history class tho. I don’t remember jack fucking shit, sorry.

And uh… that’s where I am now???

Now I’m actually taking art seriously, and with internet access I can look for tutorials and references no problem. I’ve got a few good art books, but mainly I reccomend one by James Gurney called Light and Color for the Realist Painter. Or whatever, I cannot be assed to google it rn I’ve been typing for like an hour. Maybe two… idek. Also some good youtube chanels, sinix design, sycra, istabrak, bobby chiu and ahmed aldoori, really recommend those for learning!

Anyway I’m more aware of my shortcomings, and working hard to fix them, all while still ejoying doing what I do. Although lately I feel like I’ve gone backwards in quality and launched myself into more stress and difficulty. And I certainly do much less, and finish things less also. I wonder why… :T

UHM I’m not even sure if I answered your question i just kinda went on a tangent oops. Hopefully this is an entertaining read if nothing else?

[happybirthdayadym-blog]

Hey bubs! happy birthday! i’m so happy for you i hope you have a kickass day and that you enjoy all the concerts you get to go to lucky! now time to get hella sappy, i love ya bubs, you’re the best internet brother a girl can ask for and certaainly an even better best friend. i’m so glad you came into my life, we havent even know each other a year and i feel like we’ve been best friends for a lifetime, we get along great and we have so much in common, you’re an amazing person. even tho you are a sarcastic asshole and you can get under my skin sometimes, you are even better at being there for me when i need someone to listen and you are always there when i need cheering up or a good laugh, i can always count on you. you know 7/28 is a bad day for me bc i lost my grandma on this day last year, but its also a even better day bc god made it a day for me to be happy to celebrate the birth day of an awesome friend! always stay you michaelson, don’t ever change for anyone, you’re awesome just the way you are and i couldnt be more lucky to have you in my life. hope yo have an amazing birthday, i’m glad im here to help you celebrate it, whoop whoop 25, you old fart. aha, love you bubs. 

- xoxo saint sam (but you know that i hate when you call me sam, so leann lol)

[jooheonies]

20 Questions

I was tagged by: @to-move-on-means-to-grow (thank u sm!!)

RULES: answer the 20 questions and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better.

NAME: Nawar (my writer name is Kinza but lets be real nobody uses that)

NICKNAME: Narhwal, Nawhore, Nawat, Nawart (i clearly have gr8 friends)

GENDER: Female

STAR SIGN: Libra

HEIGHT: 5′1.46″ 

TIME RIGHT NOW: 4:01 PM

LAST THING I GOOGLED: fuck off in portugese

FAVORITE BANDS: im just gonna do kpop and these are groups i stan: SHINee (ult), B.A.P, Monsta X, Seventeen, BTS, EXO, F(X), Red Velvet, Astro, Block B, Winner, DreamCatcher, Blackpink, Secret, SNSD, AOA, Highlight, KARD, yo there’s a lot more im prob missing (not in any particular oder)

FAVE SOLO ARTISTS: again just kpop: Jonghyun, IU, Hyuna, K.Will, Jooyoung, DEAN, Crush, Heize, Yezi, Hoody, Jay Park, there’s prob more (in no particular order)

LAST MOVIE I WATCHED: The Bee Movie (a contemporary masterpiece)

WHEN DID YOU CREATE YOUR BLOG: ehm three(?) months ago? about then ya

WHAT DO YOU POST: I write for mx mostly and i post shitty tattoo edits (run away while u can)

WHEN DID YOUR BLOG REACH ITS PEAK? Ahh i think about a month or so ago? I got a lot of requests and it made me really happy! im a horrible person tho bc im so far behind on requests

DO YOU HAVE OTHER BLOGS: Nope!

DO YOU GET ASKS REGULARLY: Ehhh, sometimes ish, mostly theyre requests and the occasionally cutie bean that pops in to give me lov which makes me scrE ECH

WHY DID YOU CHOOSE YOUR URL: i was typing in monsta x on youtube and i missed the “n” and accidentally “m” and being the good, mature person i am, i laughed and was like “lol ur mom” so that’s why im urmomstax

FOLLOWING: 105

POSTS: 528

HOGWARTS HOUSE: Slytherin (even tho jk rowling never gave any slytherins the chance to redeem themselves, we are not a bad bunch haha im not bitter :)))

POKÉMON TEAM: mystic

FAVORITE COLORS: grey, black, white, light pink

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: totally sporadic but abt 4-5 hours

LUCKY NUMBERS: ya i dont have those but i like the number 6

FAVE CHARACTERS: Flynn Ryder, Lord Farquaad (h0tti3), Howl, Calcifer, Princess Mononoke, the grandma from mulan, elle woods (an icon), shego, Nani from lilo and stitch (the actual role model ngl), Haruhi from OHSHC, Kyo from fruits basket, mr.krabs (loml), jimmy neutron’s friend carl wheezer, juandisimo, idk i like a lot of characters tbh

WHAT AM I WEARING NOW? black off the shoulder top and black jeans (i only own monochrome clothing lmao)

HOW MANY BLANKETS DO YOU SLEEP WITH: two

DREAM JOB: astronaut or paleontologist or literally anything at NASA i stan nasa theyre my ult

DREAM TRIP : Japan, Switzerland, Spain

I tag:  @shownud @honeyheonie @maraschinoneko @/whoever feels like it i dont even know 20 ppl irl how am i supposed to tag 20 ppl on the internet wut

[survivormarmoreal]

Episode #5: "his Kirby ass can shut the hell up” - Marie

Charlie being safe!? Yas. Good for me since he is part of my alliance.

An alice them challenge. Uh yass!! 🦑 i have the book so i can quickly look thru it and find people, items, food, and other stuff which is good for us. I dont want to go to tribal.

nicolegilmoreToday at 7:42 PM That was probably Kaleigh bc I would open messages and not answer them

that was about when we played before and she was part of a 3 person catfish. but funny enough it still applies to this game!!! love when she leaves me on read for 20 hours

So I feel good with my standing in this tribe tbh. I feel like I have made meaningful contributions to the tribe in challenges and have a good rapport with a few tribe members. Keaton and Marie might be the easiest too get out, even though I am aware that it makes me a threat but we been used to that feeling. Having the idol as extra security as well makes me feel good so eeeek. I just want too survive to merge and link up with new people and people who i know as well, and play off that. im super nervous but also excited, i just hope to god we win this immunity

At first I thought this Alice and wonderland challenge was going to be super fun an exciting. At first it was. Now its getting a little frustrating and annoying seeing Not Found (something along those lines). I'm hoping that our 28 items is higher than the other tribe's or at least being a tie. I want to avoid tribal still because still feeling sketch about this tribe.

Our search isnt doing too well. And nicole went missing and dont know she is. We have 28 items. Hopefully thats enough but i have a feeling in my stomach that it isnt and im scared. Dont want to go to tribal. Hope we win though. 🤞

if kirby does not tell me his great great great great grandmas waffle recipe hes done for. like why bring it up if ur not gonna share. ??? um we won immunity again and im so happy bc i dont want to go to tribal bc even tho there are MULTIPLE ppl i want out i dont want to risk it. stan list right now is dennis, naptime, matt, marie. everyone else? and matt and marie barely on there too... but um actually starting to like them and theyre more responsive now so love that! by the end of this game ill actually know things about alice in wonderland wooh!

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Okay so this sucks. We all really tried hard and we only lost by 2 points which is so frustrating. Not to mention that Nick and Charlie couldn't even find anything at all. And now we're in a really shitty spot because sending Nick home would be an easy out but he possibly has this legacy advantage thing which he can use tonight and if that means he's safe than idk what to do because I have a strong alliance with the other 4 people on my tribe. Which means now we have to come up with a plan to make sure Nick feels safe and he doesn't use his advantage but we still put the majority of votes on him. Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Okay I'm laying it on thick with Nick. Really trying to play the middle and see where his head is at. I think honestly chances are Nick will make it through this round but I want to make sure after the vote he still trusts me but he does use his Legacy Advantage. Brian and I are walking a very thin line.

Yas. We won immunity again! 🦑 Still on of the 3 people not go to tribal yet which is pretty awesome. I’m now hoping that Charlie, Sharky, and Brian can find a way to survive again. Don’t want to lose any of them. Hopefully we merge soon. Its going to be down to 12 people after tomorrow’s tribal. Only ones to really talk to me on this tribe is Dennis, Bryce, Keaton and sometimes Matt. Havent talked to much to Marie. And Nicole ive tried but ignored. If anything it would be cool to blindside Nicole at first tribal in the merge.

I think im going to talk game to keaton today and see if we could work together. And im also going to see what Bryce thinks about us working together as well. Im just nervous if tonight we do merge at tribal, i dont want to be first boot. I want to make it far in this game.

I don't know if my last confessional went through, so I'll just send another one in hehe...

I do feel like Charlie is going home this round because of his idol play last round, but it could also be Nick going or him using his Legacy Advantage and all that being gone.  I don't really know, but I want to make sure it ain't me and that's what's important.

As for other things... love Sharky, what a king.  Love Nathan, another king... Annabelle's really cool, ya... I love Charlie but he's still probably gonna die... and ya kjHDA... that's all I have to say...

Scared for merge because L O fucking L... that's going to be a mess.  It could be coming tonight, but I really do not know and I'm scared…

Keaton decides to call me inactive in the tribe chat but his Kirby ass can shut the hell up, he's just bitter I voted against him the first tribal and he's tryna put the target on my ass. Thank god we won the challenge because I don't know if I would've stayed. I have good relationships with Bryce Matt and Dennis but I don't know if that's enough to keep me.

So first off. Sorry for no video confessional. But not enough happened to bramble around and take 3 hours of my internet for uploading slow AF but here is a small summary of what happened to my game. Idolsearch: went to the tugley woods again. I guess you need a map to find your way through it, but what do i know D: Last tc: Charlie played his idol and mentioned publically that all of his old tribe knew about that idol anyways. What kind of made me a bit suspicious. Mainly because when he told me, he said that he really wants to work with me and thats why he is telling me this secret. I don't mind that the idol is gone, but if he told that everyone? mhm... I approached maynor to see if he knew and he said NO. so maybe I did a whoopsie? WHO KNOWS.

Eitherway. Anna announced a "live challenge" after this tribal (oh yeah we are safe again woo), but since we would be down to 12 I wouldn't be surprised if that "live challenge" is actually the merge announcement? If not. I think EVEN IF WE LOSE i should be in a decent position? Because Keaton couldn't keep his mouth shut and when it came to sitting someone out and called out Marie in the tribe chat. Bad move for him, good for me. Because even if we go to tribal unless someone really wants to target me for some reason it should be between those 2

Okay so we've come up with a slightly complicated plan. Looks like I'm going to lose Charlie this round which makes me kind of sad because I really get on well with him. But it's what i have to do to get further in the game. We're going to split the vote so The Dinah Dudes vote fro Nick. The OG Absolem people vote Charlie. Anna tells Nick he needs to use his Legacy Advantage so we get rid of that from the game. I just hope I come out of this without hurting Charlie or pissing off Nick.

AJ just used an emoji that CHANGED. MY. LIFE. It's like praying and trying to stay calm and then fire happens and it says BOI! And if that isn't a fucking mood idk what is!

Y'all I am so bad at this idol hunt. I keep choosing locations that don't even have choices. Yikes. Everybody else has advantages and shit and I'm just sitting in an empty meadow.

I’m sad we lost i actually tried for this because I didn’t want a complicated tribal but bleh Idk how this will work but I think it will work out for the best potentially if it goes the way I’m hoping. I loved this comp though the hosts did a great job with it. It was actually fun

With merge approaching I think that it’s important I remember I really don’t owe anything to the people on my tribe... they voted out Jayden and told me nothing and I think it’s time for some revenge.. all you people in the viewing lounge stay tuned... Ima show you why I’ve never not made a merge!

I’m not sure if it’s day 13, I’ve been safe every single round and I have absolutely no clue how I am doing that.....Dennis is my one and only ally. Hopefully it's merge time!

Honestly, I think I might be going home lol. Brian and Sharky are telling me Nick but no one else has messaged me. Severely regretting using my idol now lol.

Hope my bois have still got my back, even though I haven't been that helpful in challenges recently. I'm hoping it'll reduce my threat level for merge hehe

Ive been talking to Bryce and wants to work with me. This is great. So on this tribe i have Dennis and Bryce and perhaps even keaton. So just nervous for live challenge.

LAST MINUTE SCRAMBLING. Sounds like Nick is trying to flip the vote on Brian. he asked Nathan and Anna to flip off of Charlie. So Now Brian is worried (Which is totally fair) because he doesn't know if he can trust Anna. So even if Nathan/Brian/I stick to the plan, if she flips and Nick uses his advantage Brian goes home. So now he wants to flip his vote so worst case scenario it goes 2-2-2 and we can fix things on the revote. Ugh I hate scrambling. I prefer my tribals over easy.

Charlie is voted out 3-2.