#im still using the label queer btw if u were curious

[teenagefeeling]

friends! so i kinda had an epiphany the other day & im extremely certain that i am asexual and i suddenly feel like about 50 pounds has just been lifted off my shoulders tbh. it doesn't rly change much about my life, but i spent a long time feeling like something was wrong and it's really, really nice to be able to come to terms with this part of myself for the first time

that being said, realizing something like this at 24 is very funny in a lot of ways. brief list of things i said or did regularly for years while still somehow remaining in denial about being ace:

did not know how to respond in kind when people expressed physical attraction to me so i just "made things up"

"i'm not ace, i'm just not that interested in sex"

"sex only matters because it builds intimacy and gets you closer to people"

been confused as to why anyone would ever cheat on a partner just to have sex or leave them for someone more attractive

scrolled through ace positivity blogs because they inexplicably made me feel better to read

thought about the plots to movies, books etc. or started conversations during sex to keep myself entertained

only expressed sexual or romantic interest in people who liked me first or people i had an established friendship with

"i don't care how my potential partner looks, sex is the same with anyone so personality is all that matters"