#im so tired. borh emotionally and physically and i feel just like. so overstimulated
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#im so tired. borh emotionally and physically and i feel just like. so overstimulated#talked to my grandma. i havent talked to her in a few years because my dad made me feel like i had to isolate myself from his family. so#yeah. i had to walk away before she ended the call because i started crying abit. i just am so emotionally fragile i cant handle anything#i was fine after that. had an amazing day even#but right before i wrnt to recuperate in my room. like bc im so exhausted etc. my mom asked about my grandma#and i was like she sounded fine but my sister was saying she sounds different and that she needs to be in a wheelchair because the pain of#her spine cancer is too much and i just like. ywah i knew that i just literally dont have the emotional capacity or ability right now to#talk about it or be honest like that im just so. i dont know i had to leave again because i almost started crying#im coming to terms with the fact that i need to visit her and i want to its just. its going to be so hard#im just. how am i supposed to handle all this when im already so emotionally wrought.#ok i just made myself cry i need to sleep and calm down#i just need to. stop fucking thinking. for once in my life#jace.txt
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