#im so tired i have no idea what to caption this.

[solplease]

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[theonottsbxtch]

it's ok im ok | LN4

an: it's ok im ok by tate mcrae is out and i had this idea the minute i heard it the first time so i've been writing this the last two hours. this was very rushed so please be nice, slight oscar x yn (no use of yn)

written and smau

face claim: pintrest and queen t8

newgirlfriend just posted

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, maxverstappen1 and 159,382 others

oh he's so perfect

**coments have been restricted**

When she’d first broken up with Lando, she’d been distraught. He was the love of her life, or at least she’d thought. For over a month, she’d spent every passing moment reminiscing on all the good parts she could remember of the relationship, but as that month came to a close, the fog began to lift. 

There was no good.

At first there was, there had been the dates, the gifts, the flowers and the continuous travelling alongside her. The texts of ‘I miss you’ and ‘I love you’ at least once a day had diminished into a ‘gn’ and ‘gm’ eleven months into the relationship. 

The affection that once felt so constant had turned into something routine, something obligatory. She’d ignored the signs at first, brushing off the growing distance as just a phase, believing things would eventually go back to how they were in the beginning. But they didn’t.

She remembered the nights when he would cancel plans at the last minute, claiming he was too tired from work, yet his social media was filled with stories of nights out with his friends. The times he’d forgotten important moments — her promotion at work, her 21st birthday, their anniversary. Every time, he had a perfectly reasonable excuse that she had willingly swallowed, desperate to hold onto the image of the man she’d thought he was.

The excuses, the half-hearted apologies, and the lack of effort slowly chipped away at her, until one day, she woke up feeling emptier than ever, wondering where she’d gone wrong. She’d blamed herself, convinced she was being too demanding, too needy.

But now, with some distance, she could see it all for what it was: she’d been in love with an idea of him, a projection of her own desires. The real Lando was far from the prince charming she had made him out to be. He was just a guy who knew how to charm his way through life, good at saying the right things but never following through.

She realised now that the man she’d loved never truly existed; he was a mirage, built from wishful thinking and her own desperation to be loved.

So when Mclaren invited her to celebrate the new season, she took it knowing she was a mature adult, after all he’d moved on. So could she.

“She’s posted him again,” Her best friend spoke from the sofa where she’d been waiting for her to touch up her makeup. “Caption is ‘Oh he’s so perfect’ with some flowers and a teddy bear.”

“Poor girl.” She muttered to herself as she applied some gloss. “She’s still in the honeymoon phase,”

Her best friend hummed and laughed as she continued to scroll through the photos.

Unlike many ex girlfriends, she didn't hate the new girl, no if anything she pitied the next girl and the inevitable one after that, it wasn’t their fault that he acted like the perfect gentleman at the start.

She sighed, putting the lip gloss down and meeting her own eyes in the mirror. "I mean, she’s just like I was," she added, more to herself than to her friend. "I remember thinking he was my perfect match, too. All those little gestures, the compliments, the way he always seemed to know exactly what I wanted to hear. I fell for it, hard."

Her friend glanced up from the phone, a knowing look in her eyes. "Yeah, but you saw through it eventually. And you got out."

She nodded, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Yeah, I did. And I’m not gonna pretend that was easy, but I did it. I’ve just gotta hope she figures it out sooner rather than later."

Her friend grinned. "I bet you’re dying to go up to her tonight and give her a friendly warning."

She laughed at that, shaking her head. "Oh, no. I’m not getting involved unless the opportunity comes up . She won’t listen anyway; no one does when they’re in the thick of it. Besides, it's not my place."

Her friend tilted her head, watching her closely. "You’re really okay with all this?"

She paused for a moment, considering her answer. Was she really okay? Seeing those photos had stirred something in her, but it wasn’t jealousy. It was more like a dull ache, a memory of a wound that had already healed. "I think so," she said finally, smiling a little. "I mean, it still sucks to see, but not in the way it used to. I guess... I’m more relieved than anything. Relieved that it’s not me anymore."

Her friend nodded in approval. "That’s growth, babe. And tonight, we’re gonna celebrate that growth with some champagne and dancing. No thinking about exes, just fun."

She laughed, grabbing her bag and turning to face her friend. "Deal. Now, let’s get out of here before I change my mind."

They headed out the door, a cool breeze greeting them as they stepped into the evening air. As they walked to the car, she glanced at her phone one more time, catching a glimpse of Lando’s face on her social media feed. His arm was around the new girl, that same easy smile on his lips, the same charm in his eyes. But this time, it didn’t sting. It didn’t make her chest tight or her stomach drop. She felt...nothing.

“His teammate was fitter anyway,” At first she hadn’t heard it but when she did, she turned to face her friend, “What? I’m saying what we all saw.”

“I’m not stirring that pot.”

“You’re not but I am.” Her friend laughed as she pulled out of the parking lot, “Think about it, he��ll be there tonight, freshly broken up. Maybe you two can bond over that.”

Her eyes widened as she looked at her friend, “He broke up with his girlfriend?”

“I knew you were interested!”

She rolled her eyes, feeling a flush creep up her neck. "I’m not interested," she insisted, but the hint of a smile played at the corners of her lips, betraying her. "It’s just… surprising, that’s all."

Her friend shot her a knowing look. “Oh, come on. I’ve seen how you look at him. All those race weekends, sneaking glances when you thought no one was watching. You can’t deny it.”

She laughed, a light, genuine sound she hadn’t heard from herself in a while. "You’re imagining things. Besides, just because Lando's teammate is single doesn’t mean I’m ready to jump into something new."

Her friend raised an eyebrow. “Who said anything about jumping? Maybe just dip a toe in. Have fun for once. You deserve it."

She hesitated, biting her lip as the car sped through the city streets. "I don’t know… it just feels too soon."

"Too soon? Or maybe the perfect time?" her friend challenged. "It’s not about replacing Lando. It’s about letting yourself feel good again."

She stared out the window, watching the city lights blur into a kaleidoscope of colours. Her friend was right. She had spent so long grieving over Lando, replaying every mistake and wondering where she went wrong. Maybe it was time to let someone else in, even just a little.

“Okay," she finally said, her voice steady. "If I see him tonight, I’ll talk to him. No expectations, no pressure. Just… a conversation."

Her friend grinned. “Now, that’s the spirit. And who knows? Maybe you’ll find out he’s more than just a pretty face.”

She laughed again, this time with more ease. “Or maybe I’ll find out he’s just another disaster waiting to happen.”

Her friend chuckled, “Only one way to find out.”

By the time they’d pulled up to the club and handed the keys to the valet, there was a solid blush on her cheeks. After all, she had spent the rest of the car ride looking at Oscar’ photos. 

She felt the bass of the music underneath her feet as she and her friend handed their ID’s to the bouncer, waiting as he checked their names off the list.

“Right let me find some virgin cocktail, you go find Oscar.”

“Absolutely not, I’m getting a drink first.”

When they reached the bar, they eyed up the drinks board, everything seemed so tempting. Starting easy she ordered herself a vodka coke. No point trying to talk to Oscar if she was sloshed. 

“Your replacement, 12 o’clock.” She heard her friend shout over her drink.

She turned around, subtly glancing in the direction her friend had pointed. There she was, the new girl — bright-eyed, smiling, and looking like she had the world at her feet. Her heart clenched for a moment, a tiny pang of something she didn’t want to name, but then she felt it ease just as quickly. It wasn’t jealousy; it was almost… nostalgia.

The girl was everything she remembered herself being — full of hope, dressed to impress, standing a little too close to him as if she needed to mark her territory. And there he was, Oscar, just as charming as ever. Leaning in, whispering something that made the girl laugh loudly, the kind of laugh that begged for attention.

Her friend nudged her side. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she said, swallowing a sip of her drink. “Just feeling pity, really.”

“Well,” her friend prompted, “you gonna say hi or what?”

She took a deep breath. “I think I’ll let them have their moment. Besides, I’m not in the mood to play the ex-girlfriend card tonight.”

Her friend snorted. “What, you don’t want to ruin their Instagram-perfect night?”

She grinned. “Tempting, but no.” She took another sip, feeling the warmth of the alcohol begin to relax her nerves. “Let’s dance, yeah?”

“Don’t have to ask me twice.”

Grabbing her phone off the bar and shoving it down her bra, she took her friend’s hand and brought her to the middle of the dance floor, some Flo Rida song making the walls shake. 

Moving to the beat of the music, she looked as her friend began to dance on her, pulling her hand on her hip as they danced in sync enjoying the moment and ignoring the fact that she could see Lando looking at her and not his new girlfriend.

She felt the bass thump through her chest, each beat syncing with her pulse as she lost herself in the music. Her friend’s laughter was infectious, and she couldn’t help but grin, the tension in her shoulders easing as she swayed to the rhythm.

Lando’s gaze was heavy on her, almost burning through the crowd. She could feel it, a mix of curiosity and maybe a hint of regret. She didn’t look directly at him — not yet. Instead, she let her movements become more carefree, twirling with her friend and raising her arms in the air as the chorus hit. The whole room seemed to pulse with the beat, and she revelled in the feeling of letting go, if only for a moment.

Her friend leaned in, her voice barely audible over the music. “He’s staring,” she said with a sly smile.

She shrugged, flipping her hair back with a casual flick. “Let him,” she replied, her voice loud enough to be heard over the music but still cool and collected.

And then, on a whim, she spun around, facing him across the crowded room. Their eyes met, and she held his gaze for a heartbeat longer than she intended. His expression was unreadable — a mix of surprise, maybe a flicker of something else. But she didn’t want to decipher it; she didn’t care to.

Instead, she raised her drink in a mock toast, a sly smile playing at her lips, before turning her back to him again. She felt a surge of confidence, a quiet thrill in knowing she no longer needed his validation or attention. She was here to have fun, to enjoy the night, not to relive old memories or make a scene.

Her friend noticed the exchange and leaned in again. “You sure you don’t want to give him a piece of your mind?”

She laughed, a real, genuine laugh that felt good in her chest. “Nah, he can watch if he wants. It just shows he’s not as over it as I am.”

She turned her attention back to her friend, giving her a playful spin. “Anyway, I have a much hotter date.”

This time her friend laughed loudly, “Uh huh you do, I’ll go get us refills.”

“I’ll come with,” she offered, even though she was beginning to feel herself in the middle of the crowd.

“No, you just stay here.” Her friend gave her a final wink before disappearing into the crowd, leaving her alone on the dancefloor. The bass of the music pulsed through her, making her heart race in time with the beat. That’s when she spotted Oscar — tall, confident, with a warm smile that seemed to cut through the throng of people. He was one of the few people who had been genuinely kind to her since she’d met him, and there was a sense of magnetic energy between them.

He extended his hand with a charming grin. “May I have this dance?”

Without missing a beat, she placed her hand in his, feeling a thrill of excitement. They moved closer, the heat of their bodies melding together as the music swelled. He guided her into a slow, sensual dance, their movements smooth and synchronised. His hands rested lightly on her hips, and she could feel the tension of his touch, a mix of confidence and tenderness. Overlapping her hands on his, she tightened his grip on her hips.

As they danced, she felt a rush of freedom, the worries and old feelings from earlier dissolving into the rhythm. She glanced to her side and caught a glimpse of Lando across the room. He was watching them, his expression a mixture of surprise and frustration. For a moment, their eyes locked, and she saw the flash of jealousy in his gaze. She raised an eyebrow slightly, a smirk playing on her lips as if to say, “Look at me now.”

Returning her focus to the Oscar, she let herself be completely immersed in the moment. His touch was intoxicating, his eyes locked on hers with an intensity that made her feel desired and cherished. They moved together effortlessly, each step and sway adding to the intimate connection they were building on the dancefloor.

Oscar leaned in, his breath warm against her ear. “You look amazing tonight,” he murmured, his voice low and husky. “I mean you always have, but tonight things are different aren’t they?”

She shivered at his words, the tension between them palpable. She responded with a soft laugh, her fingers trailing up to his neck as she whispered back, “They are, aren’t they?”

As the song reached its climax, they pulled closer, their bodies pressed together in a way that felt both exhilarating and soothing. She let herself be lost in the sensation, feeling a newfound sense of liberation and sensuality. The world outside seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of them in their own private dance.

The song ended, but they stayed close, their breaths mingling. “I’m going to the bathroom, but I’ll see you here for round two?” she said, trying to be heard over the music.

“I won’t go anywhere,” he replied with a teasing smile, his voice like velvet. She wanted to linger in his warmth a moment longer, but she knew she needed to regroup. The minute she snapped out of her trance, she found the bar and her friend, dragging her to the nearest bathroom.

Finding the handicap stall, she pulled them inside and slumped against the wall, grabbing her drink out of her friend’s hand.

“Fuck me,” she whispered, her voice a mix of exhilaration and happiness.

“I am not Oscar, but I’m sure he would if you asked nicely,” her friend quipped, trying to lighten the mood.

She let out a tired laugh, shaking her head. “Not what I meant. I just… I don’t know. It’s weird being back in this place. Wow. That dance - I.”

Her friend gave her a knowing look. “At least give me a heads up if I’m going to drive home alone tonight.”

As she took another sip of her drink, she heard the bathroom door swing open, followed by the sound of animated giggling. It was Lando's new girlfriend, chattering excitedly with a friend. Her voice carried through the thin bathroom walls, brimming with admiration.

“Oh my god, he’s just so perfect!” she gushed. “I can’t believe how lucky I am. He’s got everything—charm, looks, and he’s so sweet. I feel like I’m in a dream.”

Her friend raised an eyebrow, glancing at her. “Are you okay?”

Suppressing a laugh, she stood up and pushed open the door to the cubicle. As she emerged, she locked eyes with Lando’s new girlfriend in the mirror.

“Hey there,” she said, her voice smooth yet edged with cool detachment. “So, which version of him is perfect, the off-season version or the regular season?”

The new girlfriend blinked, visibly startled. Her smile faltered, and she looked momentarily confused. “Uh, I don’t really understand what you mean.”

She could sense her best friend trying hard not to laugh behind her. Shrugging lightly, she maintained a mix of sympathy and detachment in her gaze. “Just a thought. Sometimes people have different sides to them, you know? What you’re seeing now might not be the whole picture.”

Before the new girlfriend could respond, her friend besides her chimed in . “You’re just jealous.”

She turned, a knowing smile on her lips. “Oh, sweetie, it’s okay. I’m perfectly fine. After all, I had him first.” Without giving the new girlfriend a chance to reply, she gently but firmly guided her friend out of the bathroom and back into the club.

As they re-entered the lively atmosphere, her friend grinned at her. “That was hot.”

She chuckled, feeling a sense of empowerment and closure. “Glad you think so. Let’s enjoy the rest of the night.”

ynprivate just posted

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, yourbestfriend and 38 others

it's ok im ok

**comments have been restricted**

[holllandtrash]

soft (dog) launch | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x influencer reader (korean reader, sora park face claim)

soft launch of their relationship but it's solely through the instagram account of their dog

yourusername

liked by yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc and 211,875 others 

yourusername good morning

view all 3,161 comments

yourbestfriend it is quite literally 7:30 at night

yourusername not in hawaii

charles_leclerc added to their story

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 477,198 others

tagged: rivayacht

charles_leclerc sea day with the best co-captain

view all 3,224 comments

scuderiaferrari we expect to see your co-captain in the paddock after the break🫡🫡

landonorris no way that dog has its boating license

pierregasly you two look alike

liked by yourusername

sunni_f1fan charles got a puppy?????

starlightpierre that man does not have time to take care of a puppy 💀

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by yourbestfriend, bellathetravelingpup and 197,559 others 

tagged: bellathetravelingpup

yourusername hawaii dump

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bellathetravelingpup thanks for taking me on this trip mum!!

liked by charles_leclerc

bellathetravelingpup

liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc and 892 others 

bellathetravelingpup i wonder where we're going next

view all 18 comments

yourbestfriend i can't believe you made an insta for your dog

yourusername it wasn't my idea believe it or not

welldonejanessa charles follows a dog finsta im laughing so hard

russell63s AND THE DOG FINSTA FOLLOWS CHARLES LOL

yourusername added to their story

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, scuderiaferrari and 392,883 others

tagged: dior

charles_leclerc always a pleasure dior

view all 2,844 comments

f1 😍😍😍😍

lecler1016 i can't be the only one who saw y/n's story post of her dior bag

luvgrussell I SAW THAT!! valtterisuns but is bella in monaco with them? that's the important question

bellathetravelingpup added to their story

bellathetravelingpup

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 773 others 

bellathetravelingpup mum says we can't stay in monaco, where should we go next?

view all 22 comments

charles_leclerc how about london?

bellathetravelingpup what a good idea!!!! spideystroll im screaming and crying

paddockgf oh to be bella in monaco rn

bellathetravelingpup

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 1,872 others 

bellathetravelingpup dad took me to work with him, he says tyres don't make good beds but i think they're comfy

view all 95 comments

scuderiaferrari she's just warming up the tyres

yourusername if she fits she sits

liked by charles_leclerc

pierregasly i can't believe i'm following an instagram for a dog

bellathetravelingpup i can't believe pierre gasly liked my picture🐶

bellathetravelingpup added to their story

scuderiaferrari

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 335,918 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

scuderiaferrari Bravissimo Charles 👊 P1 for the first race back! Starting the second half of the season off strong💪

view 2886 comments

charles_leclerc ❤️❤️

swiftysainz BELLA AND Y/N WHERE THERE TO SEE HIM WIN!!

hamilsuns but she wasn't in the crowd celebrating 😥😥 albonscar on f1tv there was a quick pan to her in the back of the ferrari garage holding bella!! it probably wasn't safe to bring bella out into a crowd like that

bellathetravelingpup

liked by yourusername, scuderiaferrari and 1,979 others 

bellathetravelingpup dad won which means he gets extra cuddles

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yourbestfriend who wrote that caption

yourusername bella did

landos4is we are once again relying on bella's instagram for charles and y/n content

yourusername

liked by yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc and 384,889 others 

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername congrats c❤️ i don't think i'll ever get tired of watching you race (also pictured: me using bella to wipe my tears .5 seconds after you won)

view all 5,868 comments

charles_leclerc my favorite girls❤️🐶

paddockgf FINALLLLYY HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH

yourbestfriend bella looks so confused

yourusername she just wanted to chase the cars landonorris you should have let her, she probably would have lapped albon alex_albon i would have let bella win

requests are open

[starhwazz]

·:*¨༺ ♱ A case of insomnia ♱ ༻¨*:·

「 ✦ Seongjoong ✦ 」

「Wordcount : 6,454」 ── 「NSFW」

「Hongjoong was holding the outline of his dick through the sweats. His team ring being lit up by the blue light and some of his dick outline also being lit. He looked huge. And it took everything in seonghwa not to run into that bathroom and suck him dry, Choking on hongjoongs dick tearing up as the shorter mans fucks up into his mouth」

「 Content: 」

── Top Hongjoong, bottom Seonghwa

── Masturbation, lewd pics, dry humping, hand jobs, mutual masturbation

Like every other night, Seonghwa was having trouble falling asleep, and although he had promised himself that tiktok would help him feel tired. he ended up staying up watching every video that ran on his feed. But he was intrigued by this specific video.

He was on his private fake stan account that was dedicated to hongjoong only because he and hongjoong were close, Like really close. And he thought it would be nice to dedicate a account to his best friend. Just because.

Now he came across a tiktok that had a video of a woman in the back giggling and screaming as she hit the wall in slowmo, Now he thought it was hilarious. But the captions over the video and the comments piqued his interest.

“Atiny when that one hongjoong edit plays.” He had no idea what the edit was nor why atiny was freaking out over it, He scrolled through every comment and every reply and it all consisted of atinys absolutely losing it. “The clips they used! I cant take it!!” “IM SCREAMING” was the constant comments he seen on this video and god did his curiosity peak.

And thats when he finally decided to click on the audio and to his luck the edit was the top video on the sound, He then clicked on the video and to his surprise the edit was beautifully made.

The song was captivating, as was the way each clip varied to the beat. What captivated him were the timing and flashes, the absolute talent they used while making this, rather than the fact that the video featured Hongjoong making some extremely alluring looks and risky body movements and totally not throwing his head back groaning into the camera.

He then looped the video over and over taking deeper looks at every clip, the way the editor knew what they were doing putting certain clips into this with this audio, The intro was what has him hooked using such attractive photos of his leader. I mean he did always know hongjoong was hot but this edit was doing something.

“Hwa, Please change the video i need to sleep and all i hear is the same song on repeat, I dont want to hear the moaning.” Seonghwa paused the video and turned his head to stare at the back of the oreo haired boy.

Wooyoung had his back turned to hwa, The shorter man huffed and shuffled as he tried to fall asleep. And seonghwa laid there on his own bed across from him. He bit his lip as he stared back at his phone and quickly looked up crawling towards his nightstand and grabbing his airpods, Placing them in his ears and replaying the edit.

He didn’t know what got over him but that edit was addictive he didn’t know how many times he watched it but he knew every clip by heart and when it would change, when it would end and how it would start. Why was hongjoong so.. hot?

Wait. What the fuck ? It wasn’t that. No. He quickly closed tiktok and placing his phone next to him as he laid there staring at the ceiling, He’s just tired. Yeah. Maybe he needs to sleep off this confusing edit. Yeah. Thats it.

Seonghwa quietly placed his phone on the nightstand, plugging it in and putting away his airpods being oh so careful as to not make a sound to make the brat that was sleeping across from him. Seonghwa finally laid back down closing his eyes.

But he groaned as he kept tossing and turning he couldn’t sleep but he needs too especially for the interview, He knew hongjoong would be on his ass for going to bed at 4AM. And he felt his heart skip at the thought of hongjoong, ‘ Huh? Cut that out hwa .’ He thought to himself as he turned to his side pulling the blanket with him and wrapping himself cozily. He finally felt himself drifting into sleep.

The next day the boys were all sitting near one another getting their positions ready, Seonghwa was seated next to hongjoong, What luck. He felt his heart race more than usual. And the man took quiet but deep breaths to relax, That was until hongjoong turned and smiled at him. He knew seonghwa was panicking about something so he threw him that cute smile.

And fuuck did it not help instead it made his heart race slightly and he felt his head spin with confusion, Is he still tired? He kept questioning himself not knowing he completely zoned out staring into a wall.

“Hwa, Are you okay?” Mingi spoke up leaning forward to stare at a absent seonghwa, Just then hwa snapped out of it and saw all his members staring at him.

“Im fine! Just a bit nervous.” Seonghwa brushed it off as he smiled and nodded to everyone calming their worries. Wooyoung then locked eyes with seonghwa and the younger male let out a quiet laugh.

“Makes sense why you were up so late, Hyung was nervous for the interview.” Wooyoung laughed and squinted his eyes towards seonghwa in a playful manner.

“You seriously stayed up?” Yunho said with a slight laugh in his tone.

“Yeah every night he’s up struggling to sleep but last night was the worst.” Wooyoung added whining the last word and exaggeratingly throwing his head back with a annoyed expression.

The guys laughed at wooyoung’s stupid exaggeration, San suddenly patted wooyoung smiling at the man as everyone around made annoyed sounds at the lovers.

“Get a room ew!” Hongjoong replied looking away from the two faking a gag at their skinship. “Shut up!” Wooyoung shouted towards the brown haired man.

Hongjoong and wooyoung childishly stuck their tongues out towards another and annoying made noises mocking one another.

Seonghwa stared hard at hongjoong, Suddenly focusing in every detail in his face, How his eyes get smaller when he smiles and laughs, How his cheeks fill while he smiles. And he quickly snapped out of it as he saw hongjoong stop making faces at wooyoung.

“What even kept you up hyung?” San asked softly and seonghwa thought for a second, He couldn’t let his members know he was watching an edit, Especially one of their members. Specifically the captain.

He smiled and rubbed the back of his neck innocently, “Ah i was just scrolling reading what atiny had to say about our comeback announcement, and watching some videos.” And thats when wooyoung blurted out scaring hwa.

“HE WAS WATCHING A VIDEO ON REPEAT FOR ABOUT 20 FUCKING MINUTES!” “I legit couldn’t sleeppp.. and the song had some crazyy shit in it!” Wooyoung blurted and groaned as he remembered the same song on repeat, Everyone turned to look at hwa and immediately the man was bombarded with questions.

“Who was it? WHAT song was playing? What the hell were you watching? Who’s edit was it!” Was the same questions being asked and he swore he wanted to just dig a deep hole, choke wooyoung and throw him in it.

And just when hongjoong was about to speak the interviewers spoke up asking if they were ready to start and everyone immediately calmed down and nodded, Except hwa he was completely embarrassed why did wooyoung have to always open his annoying mouth.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The interview ended after 50 minutes of shooting and hwa swore it was the longest shoot they’ve ever done, Everytime he looked at hongjoong while he talked he felt a blush creep into his cheeks painting them with a cute color and if it wasn’t for the blush already there he would’ve been dead. Every moment he talked he felt hongjoong staring at him. But it makes sense, Hes the leader, He does that to everyone so it doesn’t mean anything.

Seonghwa quickly got up and thanked the interviewers for bringing them in the channel and interviewing the members and group themselves, He made a beeline towards the drinks their staff dropped off for them at the lounge side of the huge room. Seonghwa grabbed his strawberry berry mix smoothie and sat down on the leather black couch which was surprisingly comfortable, He took his phone out and scrolled through insta reading atiny’s comments in his newest post.

That was until he was interrupted by a certain main sitting next to him, “Hwa hows the drink?” Hongjoong had asked as he grabbed his own and sipping his pineapple flavored drink sitting back and also pulling out his phone.

“Its good haven’t been able to have this in a while, Hows yours joongie.” Seonghwa said surprisingly calm, He didn’t feel insanely nervous for once being this close to hongjoong plus they’re just relaxing and drinking together that’s nothing strange.

“Hmm same, I can always ask staff to give you that whenever you wanted hwa.” Hongjoong said as he looked at hwa throwing him a sweet smile which made his heart jump, Only cause it was so sweet that he was really going to make the staff always give hwa his favorite smoothie.

“Its okay joongie you dont need too.” Seonghwaa responded also sweet and throwing him light hearted smile.

“You know, I also struggle falling asleep. You can always just text me when you cant sleep hwa.” Joong had blurted as he kept scrolling and he suddenly felt more at ease, now he has someone to text when he cant sleep.

“Then i guess get ready for me texting you tonight captain.” Seonghwa slightly shoved hongjoongs shoulder to teasingly joke with him because they always did that, Its their form of love. And just as expected hongjoong shoved him back and laughed “I will hwa.”

Just after that conversation the two went silent scrolling and drinking the fruity juices they had while sitting super close together, shoulders touching yet none of them moved instead they kept the distance close. There was nothing that felt awkward or off about this instead peaceful and calming it felt like all the nerves seonghwa had from this morning and all the tiredness and confusion last night had completely slipped away from his mind once he was in his comfort bubble that had hongjoong as the center of his bubble.

He was never fully at peace unless he was in his room building his legos or near hongjoong, Hongjoong was his safe space and seonghwa was his. They never felt awkward being close whether sitting or standing together they just felt peace. Unless one of the members tease the two.

The day passes by as the group leaves the building and goes over to their entertainment building and practice for their comeback, And this whole dance practice had seonghwa frustrated.

Not because hongjoong is in a tank top but because seonghwa keeps slightly messing up whether mixing his part up or slipping, It was annoying how he immediately froze the second he saw hongjoong in a tank top with a black cap covering his face and a jacket tied around his waist as he wore black baggy jeans with white sneakers, He looked so good in it. But that wasn’t why he was distracted. He was just exhausted.

Finally seonghwa got the part no trips no slips nothing, The members cheered as everyone got their parts down and just as fast as the excitement started it died out with staff telling them to do it a few more times until everyone is perfect.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Seonghwa had finally hit the bed, Stretching like a cat trying to get comfortable enough to sleep but of course he couldn’t, So he tossed and turned finally getting comfortable and closing his eyes.

But to his surprise nothing. He had sighed loudly out of his nose as he turned to grab his phone and stare at the time. It took 15 minutes until he gave up. He rolled his eyes at the time cursing the world for not letting him get the rest he needed but finally decided to open his phone and get to scrolling again.

And this time he’s reading comments on the new interview, He loved seeing everyone excited about new things they learned about the members but what he also loved is the clips.

And this clip had seonghwa conflicted. It was when he was talking about one of his biggest things in life and how he achieved it but the clip wasn’t of him telling his story but it was of hongjoong. The man was staring into his eyes like he was enchanted, His eyes followed everytime seonghwa moved on the chair as he spoke, His eyes were focused on him but also not. And seonghwa froze once he realized it.

Hongjoong looked at his lips… Why? That’s just fake, Right?

Wrong it’s in every clip of that part. He stares for a good 10 seconds before going back up to his eyes staring passionately. And apparently this isn’t the first time he’s done this.

The taller man sits up in shock as he keeps scrolling finding every clip where hongjoong does the exact thing and even biting his lip in some. And thats when seonghwa feels his heart race and something in his stomach just flipped.

He quickly closed out twitter, He didn’t want to keep looking because he felt like hes just trying to make something appear in something that would never happen.

So he just scrolls endlessly on tiktok but something stops him.

DING

And thats when seonghwa races to open the message.

Joong

“Yo you up?”

Seonghwa

“Yea.”

“You also having trouble?”

Joong

“Told you id be up, and yes just like you.”

Seonghwa laughed at the little blow “Just like you.” And quickly typed a response. He needed to distract himself from whatever he was feeling from the clips before.

Seonghwa

“What usually helps you sleep joongi?”

Joong

“Y you asking? Tryna steal my technique?”

Seonghwa

“Just need help getting rest.”

“And yes im stealing it <3.”

Joong

“Ill let you steal anything from me any day.”

And thats when seonghwa felt it again. That same feeling, His heart skipped his stomach fluttered and his hands got sweaty. What is wrong with him? It was just a cute snapback at his own flirty joke, Not like joong was serious.

And thats when the next message changed seonghwa’s entire life.

Joong

“Masturbating usually helps me.”

Holy shit. He felt his entire body get shivers as the next images that popped in his mind were his bestfriend, Head thrown back, Dick in hand and hes quietly moaning and groaning as he strokes himself slowly but roughly trying to waste his energy just so he could sleep. All he could think about was how he looked while doing it.

What faces did joong make? How loud does he get? Does he moan groan or whine? Does he do all of them? How fast does he go? What does he watch? Does he top?

He quickly drags himself out of that mindset, Trying to calm himself down by responding. He feels his body hot and his heart racing, He feels like a schoolgirl who almost got caught doing something against her parents strict rules.

Seonghwa

“Really?”

Joong

“Yep, It helps out alot.”

Seonghwa

“Never tried to do that to force myself asleep.”

Joong

“Hey i mean i was going to do it.”

“But i decided to text you.”

Seonghwa felt the immediate rush of blood flow everywhere but his brain. The thought of hongjoong jerking off kept popping up, And now he’s in a hole he dug himself with a problem of his own.

Seonghwa

“Wowww im so special you decided to text me over jacking off.”

“im so honored.”

Joong

“Idc. Id do it while texting you hwa. im tired and cant sleep and thats honestly the only way i know how.”

And at that second seonghwa quickly but quietly ran up and out his and wooyoungs shared room and into the bathroom he had closest to his room. He locked the door and sat at the toilet groaning as he looked at his own hard on.

Seonghwa

“Thats pretty crazy to say joong.”

And just after he sent that he raised his own hips to slide off his sweats, Along with his boxers letting his dick spring out into the cold air. He sucked air through his teeth trying to get used to the coldness.

Just as he wrapped his hand around the base of his cock his phone dinged and he immediately opened the message.

Joong

“Says the one who just ran into the bathroom.”

Seonghwa

“???”

And just then his phone dinged again this time an image showing up, He bit his lip as he anxiously opened the image. It showed him opening the bathroom door phone in hand. The photo was taken across from him. Exactly where san and hongjoong were roomied up.

Seonghwa gulped as he slowly stroke his own dick while typing back to hongjoong.

Seonghwa

“Stalker much?”

Joong

“Not my fault i saw you the second i went to do what your doing right now.”

And seonghwa quietly groaned at the fact the other male knew exactly what he was doing right now.

Seonghwa

“Perv.”

Joong

“Aren’t you also jerking off right now.”

Seonghwa let out an airy laugh as he squeezed at the tip teasing himself as he read the message out again imagining hongjoong saying that to his face, Practically spitting at him at how much of a pervert he was for masturbating while texting his best friend.

Seonghwa

“This might be weird but how do you do it.”

Joong

“Bold question, But ill answer.���

“I usually go fast and hard since im exhausted. So id rather get it over with so i can sleep.”

And that second seonghwa swore he was about to cum just at the thought of hongjoong abusing his dick forcing huge strings of cum to burst out of his cock.

Seonghwa

“I have to try that. Im usually slow and hard. But then again im never in a hurry.”

Joong

“If you really want to sleep faster everytime you get to your tip squeeze a bit tighter and twist your hand, I come fast from doing that like 3 times.”

And seonghwa immediately listens placing his phone down on the sink counter snd quickly picking up his pace and quietly moaning as he slams his hand down hard on his shaft. Keeping a fast and hard rhythm and just as he goes to stroke again he squeezes around his tip and twists while pulling his hand down his dick, The shock that spills through his dick to the rest of his body feels electric, He throws his head back and lets out a groan as he repeats the same motion and rythmn.

And the third time he does it he feels his legs start to shake as he fastens the pace and constantly twisting his dick, The absolute wave of pleasure he gets slapped with is overwhelming that he completely ignores his phone buzzing with texts and covers his mouth muffling the loud moans and curses that slip past his mouth as he shoots strings and strings of cum.

Seonghwa sits there hand full of cum as the shots of cum land on his shirt and thighs, Some missing and landing on the seat and floor. He sits back panting and catching his breath as he feels his cum becoming hard, He groans and quickly grabs the wipes wiping down his body riding himself of his cum leftovers, And cleaning the seat and floor.

He throws his cum stained shirt into the hamper leaving him shirtless in the coldness of their place. And just then another ding comes from his phone, And he quickly picks the phone up left with an image and a few messages

Joong

“Hwaaa?”

“Seems like someone took my advice.”

“I miss you i wanna talk to you before i starttt.”

1 IMAGE ATTACHED

And once seonghwa opens the image he feels his stomach drop. Completely shocked and in awe at the picture, The image shows off hongjoongs hand with his sweats, The blue light just barely lighting the shorter mans hand, And if you adjust the brightness you can see it almost perfectly. Hongjoong was holding the outline of his dick through the sweats. His team ring being lit up by the blue light and some of his dick outline also being lit.

He looked huge. And it took everything in seonghwa not to run into that bathroom and suck him dry, Choking on hongjoongs dick tearing up as the shorter mans fucks up into his mouth.

And just then seonghwa smiles at himself as he quickly pulls his sweats down slightly just showing off his vline, And the light just so perfectly shines showing his perfect abs and just stoping at his perfect hips. Vline just visible, Any further and his dick will peek out. And with that seonghwa takes a picture and sends it along with a text

Seonghwa

“Maybe you might go to sleep faster than you think joongie.”

1 IMAGE ATTACHED

“Dream of me will you.? Also thanks for the tip.”

And just with that seonghwa unlocks the bathroom, Walking out with a proud smile and just before he enters his room he stares where hongjoong would be at in the bathroom and just as he enters his room he swears he could hear a groan.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Quickly the morning arrives and seonghwa swears he had the sleep of his life, He walks downstairs and everyone turns to the usual grumpy seonghwa.

“Morning grump.” “Morning jongho.” Seonghwa replied with a smile and thats when yeosang and jongjo froze. Hwa walked past them to grab a banana from the counter behind them and walks back around and sits at the island across from the two.

Mingi turned his head and stared at seonghwa squinting at the older man trying to understand why hes not his normal grump self.

“What?” Seonghwa spoke up while having mouth full of banana. “Did you actually get sleep.?” San spoke in a soft and quiet tone, Everyone but hongjoong was confused.

Seonghwa glared over towards where hongjoong was standing at which was near the fridge, And the two locked eyes, Hongjoong smiled towards him and seonghwa smiled back and immediately everyone look at hongjoong.

“Oh my god did hongjoong help you get sleep? I heard he always stays up so im guessing he gave you tips!” Yeosang spoke up and everyone around broke out into “ohhh” and went back to their normal routine, Except wooyoung.

“Hongjoong how do you get good sleep even though san tells me it take you hours to sleep.” Seonghwa gets up to throw the banana away and grab a plate of food that wooyoung cooked earlier.

“Cant share my technique to those who dont need it.” The brown haired man said and wooyoung groaned in response.

Of course hongjoong wouldn’t say anything why would he? He would threaten the friendship by exposing themselves and saying “We jerked off last night together.”

No hongjoong wasn’t like that, And he knew that too. For the years he’s been with him in this group and the years they’ve been best friends he knows by heart hongjoong would never jeopardize anyone in the group but especially the bond they have.

And for the rest of the day he could feel hongjoongs focus on him, And seonghwa enjoyed every second. The sudden awkwardness he felt during the interview yesterday completely faded away after the two’s little fiasco last night. The weird feeling seonghwa felt as if he was feeling dirty at how much his heart would skip as joong looked at him was completely washed away as he feels something had been growing between the two and it was about to fully bloom.

Hours had passed and it was finally their break, Everyone ran to grab drinks or just lay on the couch or floor. And some just wanted to rest ontop of their preferred member. Seonghwa had walked past woosan who were practically cuddling on the dance practice floor, He had completely let his body go limp once he sat down on the black couch that rested in their practice room.

He laid his head back resting his arm on top the back of the couch while his other arm stay limp near his body. His chest was rising and falling slow as he was finally catching his breath after the hours of practice, His feet and back were killing him and he swore he developed a headache from the hardcore dancing he had just done.

And just when he felt at peace he hears footsteps approaching him slowly yet rapidly, He picks his head up and stares at an exhausted hongjoong who just walked up to him with a weak smile. He knew what his captain wanted and wouldn’t push him away, He also wanted to just rest with his comfort person.

And so they did, Hongjoong laid his whole body out on the couch and laid his head in seonghwas lap as if he were a cat just wanting to be near their owner constantly. The taller man softly played with the peaceful mans hair causing his body to relax more than it already was, He felt joongs soft inhales and exhales as he kept playing with his hair. This is what peace is. This is what he wants for the rest of his life.

Just afterwards seonghwa quickly falls asleep while hongjoong fell asleep in his lap, The two look so peaceful and happy just to be in this position, To feel completely safe and normal with small things like this. And the last thing seonghwa hears before fully sleeping is sans giggling and whispering.

At least an hour passed and seonghwa woke up as he felt hongjoong move to lay on his back, Seonghwa groans and lifts his head from leaning to the side and stretches his neck cracking the sharp pain he had from holding his neck in place like that. He then stared down and smiled at the half awake male that laid in his lap staring back at him.

“Hey.” Seonghwa spoke up his voice slightly deeper laced with the remaining drops of exhaustion that ran through his body.

“Hey.” Hongjoong responded back in his soft tone, The mix of the softness and deepness he heard made his heart skip.

The two just stared at each other with no more words spoken, The two stared into each others eyes, Their chests rising and falling slowly as they wake up from that nap. The air felt thick seonghwa felt suffocated in the air that traveled his body and wrapped around it. And that’s when seonghwa leaned in. Slowly their faces grew closer.

Seonghwa moved a piece of hair that fell onto hongjoongs face once the man had moved to get comfortable in the beautiful mans lap. Something about this made seonghwa want to risk everything. Hongjoongs gaze felt rough. Like if he was staring at him with such a huge want.

He stared eyes moving as he took in every detail. Seeing hongjoong relaxed in his lap, Seeing how beautiful hongjoong lips looked right now made his heart twist, The way his hair is laid out on his face was so hot. And he took in all the piercings he had, He always knew but to see them this close was perfect.

And the second he met eyes with hongjoong again he felt himself swallow hard and just for a few more seconds he held perfect eye contact until he stared again at hongjoongs beautiful lips and suddenly they crash together.

Hongjoong holding the back of Seonghwa’s neck as the two kissed, The kiss was quick and soft until they got longer and the kisses became intense. Hongjoong had fully sat up and moved away this time his body was staring towards hwa. Seonghwa took this quick second to look at the man’s entire body and how hot he looked as he started breathing faster. And in that second hongjoong snakes his hands around his waist and suddenly pulls him in by the waist.

Seonghwa kissed the man in response to this and suddenly he’s climbing on top of him sitting in his lap as the two kissed again.Hongjoong quickly bit the taller mans mouth causing him to open it allowing hongjoong to dominate his mouth. Taking every second to explore his mouth and just as he would do so the longer haired man whined into the kiss.

Suddenly hongjoong broke apart the kiss to catch his breath and take in the sight of a fully kiss fucked seonghwa, His lips were sore and bruised from the amount of rough kisses the two had.

“You look so beautiful.” Hongjoong said barely above a whisper as he leaned in to leave soft kisses and kitten licks to his neck, And as expected seonghwa tilted his head leaving his neck out for him to just abuse and mark up.

And hongjoong did just that, He started out with soft kisses and started biting and sucking on the mans neck leaving marks up and down his neck as seonghwa quietly moaned out with every marl to his neck.

“Joong-ah.. Is this.. mm.. okay?” Seonghwa moaned out as he stared into his eyes, Hongjoong had responded with a soft kiss to his lips and a smile.

“It is unless you don’t think so then i don’t mind stopping right here hwa.” The shorter man responded as he rubbed circles into seonghwa’s hips with his hands, It was comforting and perfect. This entire thing was.

“Mhm.” “Good im glad, Especially because of that perfect fucking tease last night.” Hongjoongs voice suddenly changed as if it was laced with lustrous undertones to his soft and needy tone.

“You liked it mmmff! Didnt you?” Seonghwa managed to speak up as hongjoong bit his neck again perfectly marking him up, And seonghwa loved every bite that he took because it symbolized that joong wanted hwa. He wanted people to know he’s his.

“Liked it? You know what you did.” Hongjoong said his tone was completely full of lust and it was driving seonghwa crazy.

“What did i do? I mean you helped me so i just wanted to show my appreciation.”He breathed out as the shorter man softly brushed his fingertips along seonghwas waist all the way up to his chest.

“Yeah by showing me your half naked sexy body while i was about to jerk off.?” And just as he said that he locked eyes with him again, And he swore he could’ve came at the spot, His eyes were so dark and hidden behind such a need such a want. It was so addictive to look in his eyes and feel himself harden more and more just with staring into his eyes.

“Well.. did it work.” “Fuck yes hwa.” And right with that sentence they crashed lips again this time it was dirty. Their lips sloppily making out, Hands traveling all over each other trying to find a perfect spot. And just as they did so seonghwa grinded his hips into hongjoongs, Their erections rubbing against each other. The sudden electric jolt that ran through their bodies sending shivers down their spines and causing pre cum to spill from their dicks was intoxicating.

The two men kept grinding against each other as if they were horny teenagers with nothing to use but a pillow to rut against. It was so hot, All seonghwa could hear was hongjoong groaning each time he rolled his hips into his. The friction being made was killing seonghwa.

Hwa then pulled his own shirt off just to feel closer to joong in anyway, He needed their skin to touch or he was going to fucking lose it. And immediately after hongjoong threw his to the side and immediately started attacking his shoulders with kisses and bites, Then his chest. Especially stopping at his muscular breasts.

That was one of hongjoongs favorite things about soenghwa. His beautiful full chest, He loved squeezing them and watching the mans face contort into such a pleased face, Watching how he reacted everytime he kissed his nipples, Hearing the beautiful sounds that slipped his mouth as he sucked and licked and bit his sensitive nipples.

Seonghwa was gripping the shorter mans shoulders as he sucked and treated his chest with such beautiful respect, The sounds hongjoong made while sucking and lapping at his chest was disgusting. And in that moment he wanted to cum.

“Joongie nghh.. Jagiya . Pleasee..” Hwa whined and hongjoong smirked as he stopped and flicked at seonghwas chest, Slightly pinching and pulling his nipples. “Yes baby?” He replied innocently and watched as seonghwa held back the loudest moan.

“Pleaseee . Joong.” “Speak jagi.” Hongjoong calmly responded just smiling up at the man who was a mess, His head was thrown back and sweat ran down his neck all the way towards his stomach. His body was covered in hickeys and bite marks, And fuck the whines spilling out of his mouth.

“I need your dick so bad.” Seonghwa moaned out as he locked eyes with hongjoong, And just like that he groaned quickly grabbing the waistband of his pants and immediately unbuttoning the pants and zipping them off, Lifting his hips up and seonghwa lifts himself up to rid himself of his pants, He sat back down on his lap their clothed dicks touching making the two bite their lips.

Hongjoong wrapped his hands around seonghwa’s long dick, Yeah it wasn’t as much as his but hwa’s size was easily 6inches. It was skinny and slightly thick and god in his eyes it was perfect. Seonghwa whimpered at the sudden grip around his neglected dick.

He slowly pumped the mans cock through his boxers and just as he did he watched seonghwa place his hands on hongjoongs things and throwing his head back as he arched up forwards. It was such s beautiful sight and he needed this man to be completely naked and a ruined mess now or else he was going to murder someone.

Hongjoong stopped and pulled both his and seonghwa’s boxers down to let their dicks spring together and to breathe. They both gasped at the cold air that smacked their dick violently, The coldness sending shivers down their body.

And just as hongjoong pulled both their dicks out he connects them by grabbing both of them and forcing them to rub together drawing a long mewl from seonghwa.

“Jagiya.. mm give me your hand.” Hongjoong groaned as he felt seonghwa’s dick twitch against his own it was such a thrilling feeling. Anyone could walk back into this room and catch the two here like this. Seeing seonghwa marked and bit up and on the brink of falling apart all at the cause of hongjoong.

And seonghwa held his hand out for hongjoong he watched as he brought his hand up to kiss it was so idiotic and adorable, And hongjoong held eye contact the entire time as he kissed his hand, And as quickly as it was cute it was hot.

Seonghwa watched as hongjoong placed his hand wrapped around both their dicks just like homgjoongs and seonghwa whimpered at the sight, He then grabbed seonghwa’s other hand and wrapped it about their dicks.

Hongjoong held an arm around seonghwa pulling him closer and their dicks rub again causing them both to moan at the sensation.

“Fuck, If you need to tap out just tell me okay.” Homgjoong said as he threw a sweet smile at hwa and im response he gets a nod amd a “hurry the fuck up please.” And just with that he starts jerking the two off at a normal speed, Seonghwa keeping his pace and doing the same as hongjoong, The two moan as they jerk each other off the feeling of having their dicks rub against each other as they pump their cocks together made seonghwa’s head spin.

He would’ve never expected that a simple “u up” text would’ve ended up with him moaning in his captains lap as he jerked his dicks off. But was he complaining? No.

“Look at me pleaseeee hwa.” Hongjoong had moaned out as he stared at him with half lidded eyes clouded by lust, The only thing on his mind was seonghwa and the feeling of his beautiful dick rubbed against his own. Seonghwa looked straight into hongjoongs eyes and moaned out as they both picked up the pace hongjoong groaned as he watched the taller boys eyes roll into the back of his head and throw his head back moaning loudly and letting curses slip past his kiss bruised lips.

Neither of them cared how loud they were just focused on how good it felt, The intoxicating sound of the wet slides of their cocks rubbing and being pumped, The strings of moans and whines of curses slipping out of hwa’s lips, And the groans and curses coming out of hongjoong filled their room and their ears. And that was their music.

Seonghwa felt his legs shake as he started pumping their dicks faster, He kept begging louder snd higher moaning out ‘fuck fuck fuck fuck.’ and a bunch of “joongie ah ah hongjoong!” in the middle of his begging. And once he saw seonghwa’s body jolt he immediately started squeezing his hand around their dicks and pumping them both fast and hard.

And just as he did that Seonghwa’s dick spasmed and squirted out strings of cum painting both their stomachs white and dicks coated, Seonghwa let out the loudest moan as he shot his cum all over his captain and himself, And hongjoong kept going even when seonghwa was a whimpering squeaking mess as he was being overstimulated.

“Hwa hwa hwa fuck im gonna cum.” Is all seonghwa heard before hearing a loud groan and watching as hongjoongs dick shot out loads mixing with seonghwa’s own cum. Once hongjoong let go of their dicks hwa let his body fall into joongs and took in his scent as he rode down from his high while joong drew circles in his back while hugging the man tightly.

“Hah, Who would’ve guessed the most innocent text lead up to the most disgusting masturbation session i ever had.” Hongjoong laughed out his voice raspy from all the groaning and moaning.

“I wouldn’t have wished for a different outcome.” The blonde spoke up kissing the smaller male before laying his forehead on his shoulder.

“Now please clean me up i feel horribly dirty.”

“Yes my princess.”

「AO3」 ────

[itsnathateasy]

planetarium!armin

im finally back with the planetarium!armin headcanons i‘ve been meaning to write based on this idea!

word count: 412 warnings: none ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ─── planetarium!armin could never have imagined someone studied the sky inside the walls, they had very basic knowledge, limited to telescopes probably but being in this huge building with information about EVERYTHING in the sky, with pictures, videos and simulations, armin was losing it

planetarium!armin drags you to every single exhibit and questions everything „how many planets in our galaxy? and how many galaxies? how did we see the galaxies if they're so far away from ours?“ „how many people have travelled to other galaxies? what do you mean none? then how can we know the information in here is for real???“ planetarium!armin loved taking pictures of everything and scribbling in his notebook, writing additional questions that kept popping into his head and jolting down names of stars and planets so that he’d return to them and conduct his research when you got home it was quite difficult to get him to settle after this celestial frenzy

his fave part of your date was probably buying the build the solar system board game, which he opened long before you made it to your apartment, in order to inspect the analogy of the figures

planetarium!armin is the type of person to cut out the pretty photos from the leaflets you were given and make a collage or a moodboard, in which he adds a picture of you two at the planetarium and then he displays it on your fridge for days he even added those little white stickers meant for captions and wrote the date and „our first time among planets“ or some silly lil thing planetarium!armin now wants to buy a telescope and you regret ever taking him to the planetarium „how about we catch the next eclipse at the planetarium? they’ve an event set up and we can sign up if you wanna go too“

baby boi is so hyped and i’m so here for it!!! you once even bought him a pack of those themed stickers for scrapbooks (cosmos themed ofc!) and he couldn’t be happier „this is so cute y/n, thank you! now we can have planet stickers all around the house!“ „no we can’t armin“ planetarium!armin is too precious for this world, the eyes he makes to get you to go to several planetariums in your vicinity, and you do go on various such dates with him („i could never get tired of the universe y/n!“) and also planetarium!armin is WAY TOO PRECIOUS FOR THIS WORLD FULL STOP ✋

[hauntedrain]

part 5: For Our Own Sanity | Alex Turner x Fem! Reader |

Social media AU Summary: Alex and readers relationship turns public after a series of events

✰▹Warnings/Notices: Age gap, highly unrealistic album set up. Not edited. last part!

liked by TaylorSwift, AlexTurner, & 40,456,465 others

@Y/N: Look what you made me do! Reputation out now on all platforms, love you guys <3

user1: I CLAIM CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT RN.

user2: okay lovely album. BUT 2ND SLIDE. EXPLAIN.

↪ user3: Alex. Alex. Alex.

↪ user4: He's laterally dating the girl he posted on his story, not Y/N.

AlexTurner: Amazing album x

Liked by Y/N

↪ user5: FATHER COMMENTED

user7: parents.

user8: Is this the end of all the endings? / My broken bones are mending / with all these nights we're spending. OH IM SCREAMING.

liked by 4,234,564 others

@Y/Nupdates: Y/N tonight on Jimmy Fallon - The tonight Show! Y/N during her time on the show talks about her leaving and writing about the album + her writing songs with and for the Arctic Monkeys.

user9: SHES SO PRETTY omfg.

user10: Okay but her shading milo and his gf over their FAKE comments and story is amazing.

↪ user11: Their interview and everything they posted about it has been deleted.

↪ user12: Karma works hard but Y/N works harder!

User13: okay everything aside who is the love songs about.

↪ user14: EXACTLY! If its not Alex shes dating then WHO! cuz most of the songs are simply someone loving her DISPITE her bad reputation.

Alex turner has posted to their story!

captioned: Ready for it...?

liked by 42,246,345 others

@Y/N: I tired black hair for a bit but the blonde looks a bit more delicate, isn't it? Also peep the MV

user15: THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE OMG.

user16: Seeing you with black hair kinda scares me

user17: Delicate music video?

↪ user18: Nah its defo TIWWCHNT.

↪ user19: I vote LWYMMD.

user20: WAIT.

↪ user21: BLACK HAIR. STORY. ALEX TURNER. Y/N?

↪user22: OMFG IT COULD HAVE BEEN Y/N.

liked by 12,345,678 others

@Alexturnerupdates: The Arctic Monkeys perform their last show in the US with Y/N L/N! This is her first appearance in the tour so far, and her first appearance on stage since her last album's tour over 2 years ago. she also sung a few songs from her new album "Reputation".

User23: The way I fucking SCREAMED.

user24: Can we talk about when Alex was singing "I wanna be yours" AND HE WAS STARRING AT Y/N?

↪ user25: OR WHEN SHE SUNG "SLUT" AND "KING OF MY HEART" AND SHE STARRED AT HIM.

↪ user26: for our own sanity, please we need confirmation rn or else!

user27: I appreciate the fact that the best quality pic is of Y/N.

user28: Alex the flower princess ong.

tagged: @Alexturner

liked by 50,345,345 others

@Y/N: All eyes on you, my magician. All eyes on us.

user29: FINALLY. WAR. IS. OVER.

user30: ALL THE SONGS ARE SUDDENLY WRITTEN ABOUT ALEX HUH?

user31: Both are glowing.

AlexTurner: ~ you make everyone disappear.

↪ user32: THE LYRICS AWWW

↪ user33: honestly even with all the signs, I'm still surprised.

liked by 13,356,128

@Alexturner: king of your heart yea?

user34: I CANT.

user35: my roman empire. MINE.

user36: PLZ Y/N STANDING THERE. LMFAO.

Y/N: the taste of your lips is my idea of luxury.

↪ user37: crying.

user38: If you look closely you can see my sitting in the middle of a highway.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ taglist: @mathdebate00 @ouroboros311 @joannfabrics @tangointhequango

⭒❃.✮:▹A/N: This is the end! Loved making this and thought about making it longer, however I didnt wanna drag on the story. But Im open for requests and ideas for fics. Love you guys and I hope you liked it.

[kuni-is-daddy]

WORKING OUT WITH GOJO SATORU. X GN READER.

Ft: Teasing, grinding.

1.1k words of gojo thirsting for u.

Gojo x Female reader smut

WARNING: NSFW CONTENT.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

At first gojo would ask you to come along just so you can watch him dead lift 200+lbs(pounds) or even be his "spotter" so he 'wouldnt get hurt', the spotter part was your idea. But just the thought of watching gojo sweat and breathe heavy gave you butterflies in your stomach. If you two would go to a public gym gojo would 100% FLEX HIS ASS OFF. Lift 200lbs? Nah gojo's going to 400lb. It doesnt matter if these other 'people' look more 'ripped' then him. He'll show them up without a problem. "Yeah you like that baby?" He'd grunt mid lift. "F-fuck..Its all for you love~" You'd scold him for pushing himself too hard but he'd suck his teeth, pick you up without warning and carry you bridal style out the gym. Laughing as you'd punch at him to put you down because it was 'embarrassing'

Gojo who would also send you pictures and videos of him lifting. Captioning how he can't wait to show you his progress. Up close. He'd sometimes even wear more revealing. Clothes during missions you two got paired up in. Turning off his infinity just so the wind can blow through his shirt and reveal his abs. Only for Utahime and Nobara to scold him.

If he's deadlifting sometimes gojo would joke around and act like the weight was too heavy for him or he got gradually tired, it could even be considered as a test of trust the first couple of times he invites you over. He'd smile and blush at how you tried so hard to hold it up for him after he made 'pained grunts.' even using cursed energy slightly because it was too heavy for you. (Gojo was completely fine holding up that much btw). He'd yank the weight off of him. trying to 'catch his breath' only to see you running around the gym that you've never been too before, asking people where you can buy water and cold towels for him. And that was another moment when gojo truly fell in love with you

One day Gojo finds you in the gym before he is. Wearing clothes lighter/thinner then your average attire as you sat on your phone waiting for him to arrive. "Hm? I see you got here before me baby~" He'd walk up to you with his gym bag. Wearing a black tank top, shorts and his iconic shades. Gojo is so tall~ (around 6'3) so even when his body isnt flexed out he towers over you so easily. "Well..I was thinking of joining you this time toru~" you smirk while looking him up and down, watching as he takes off his shades and his beautiful blue eyes glow, Now looking at you with an intimate gaze.

Gojo didnt have a problem with whatever you we're trying to achieve at the gym for any reason. Be it for your mental health, For him, Or just for the sake of being fit or trying something new. He loved the idea of you even doing something as far as exercise because it meant you we're getting stronger. Just.. 'Not as strong as him' he'd chuckle to himself while watching you do warm ups...Specifically squats.

He'd count out how much your doing, constantly telling you to push yourself and keep going 'just f' me' Until eventually it looks like gojo is enjoying himself a little TOO much. He's paying so much attention to your ass and how you'd recklessly bounce up and down from how tired you we're getting. Imagining how you'd bounce on his cock while pleading for him to let you cum "T-toru! oh fuck toru~ please..im so close daddy.." "Hah..Your so fucking good for me, Milking my cock just like that.. Dont stop.." Gojo gets caught out of his hard daze when you stop exercising and just stare at him with your hands on your hips because he somehow went from the number 14 to 69- while counting.

Gojo would pout and tug at your arm for you to keep exercising because you look so fucking hot. "Cmon baby..I promise i wont look...so much.. kay? You just..Do what your doing over there and ill be over here lifting-" he'd smile and give you a thumbs up while scooting over to the weights. "okay toru~ if you say so..." You'd constantly stop mid set to take a peek behind you to see if gojo was being a pervert, But everytime you would he'd just look 'normal'. When in reality gojo was talking glances at you, lifting with one hand and rubbing against his clothed length with the other. Mumbling how good you looked for him, How your sweat coated your body so well, watching as you perked up your lips when taking a sip of your water. "Yeah baby..thats what im talkin about' Dont stop.. your doin so well... fuck yeah..sweat for me~" You'd look at him dumfounded and ask if he was alright. "Yeah baby im great~ you keep exercising for me alright? get that heart healthy f' me~ you and that good form of yours. So fucking good" He'd take off his shirt, his chest glistening and pumping out through his sweaty body. You'd choke on your water while examining his body. "heh..Like what you see baby? Didnt get these over night~" he'd place the weight down and begin walking towards you, Flicking his hands through his hair. "How about I give you a treat baby? You've been so good f' me, working so fucking hard~ how about i help you out.."

You would shyly look away, calling gojo distracting because you we're trying to 'focus' but he loved that even more~ how dedicated you we're..how persisent you we're..All for him. He'd pull you into a sloppy kiss, picking you up and sitting on the bench. Your hands would begin to trail along his chest, Feeling his hot body against your own. "You can touch this body all you want baby~ its all yours." he pulled away from the kiss, trailing his mouth along the side of your neck, sending you chills down your body. "T-toru..we shouldnt do it here..What if someone comes in and see's.." You'd tug at his sweaty warm body. "mmm good then baby, let them see. Want everyone to be fucking jealous. So dam lucky to have you in my life, love you so dam much~" Gojo began to bite at your shoulder, tugging at your top. "shit..Wanna take you on right fucking now y/n. Cmon~ let daddy touch you, let me reward you~"

Your shivered at how touch gojo began to get, Not even trying to hide it anymore as he shifted his hands down to your waist, Moving your body over so you'd grind right against him. "T-toru...Toru.." youd moan out his name. holding onto his built arms while the intense heat of the gym ambushed your body as you could feel gojo's pent up length now grinding on your. "fuck...Yes baby?" "T-touch me..please..i want it~" "oh yeah baby~ know' you wanted more. Addicted to this cock yeah? say how much you want it~" he laid his head back against the bench, slapping your ass while you grinded against his length. "G-Gojo~ please...oh shit..please~ I cant, I wanna cum~ I wanna cum for you gojo~ I want you so bad daddy~" "Fuck yeah..thats what i wanted to hear baby~ beg for me more like a slut while daddy rewards you~"

[kindestofkings]

photography era [3]

elijah hewson x reader

reader is childhood bestfriends/ who doubles up as their occasional photographer, who is currently touring with the band!

authors note: hahahah I litch was like im gonna make a short little part 3 just to wrap this idea off and then next minute im reaching the pic limit, anyway I think it turned out cute so enjoy !

I really appreciate all the love i've received with my last insta au's y'all are the best <3

(PS: Picture credits to whoever took them)

yourusername posted on their story:

replies

inhalerfan1 feeding us ryan girlies off the bat, appreciate you <;3 lewevans hahaha wait until they get moody and tired.. -> they're gonna get WORSE??

inhalerdublin

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

inhalerdublin Thank you Lille for kicking off our EU tour.

We’re back in Amsterdam tonight for our biggest show so far at @afaslive

📸 yourusername

view all 600 comments

inhalerfan1 AMAZING SHOW!! the post concert depression is too real rn..

inhalerfan2 hiring yourusername was your best decision yet boys these pics are so hot

inhalerfan1 inhaler through the female gaze has righted all the worlds wrongs (liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

inhalerfan3 bobby girls we're being FED

yourusername I got you girlie xx

yourusername great evening !! but I am realising im touring with 4 boys for two months.. @nieveella y'all need a photographer??

(liked by nievella) bobbyskeetz why are you always tryna get rid of us.. yourusername try listening to your 12 year old boy humour 24/7 this is a hardship !

yourusername

liked by evehewson and others

yourusername guys i'm a failure, E still hasn't agreed to cover I'm Just Ken 😭 What is the point of having friends that can sing if they wont take my requests 💔

view all 200 comments

inhaler1 you are the gift that keeps on giving

inhaler2 for real get a girl who can do both

joshjenkinson_ I was gonna be pressed but i'll let it slide cause of my caption

bobbyskeetz you need to be stopped. @elijahhewson MAKE HER STOP

yourusername wah wah wah hush elijahhewson love come on yourusername heyyy its funny!

evehewson hahah you are the best ever

yourusername and you are my favourite hewson! inhaler3 inlaw bonding? inhaler2 girl chill

yourusername posted on their story:

(liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

-filling this dramatic fella with drink to get back in his good books

yourusername

liked by inhalerdublin and others

yourusername please take these photos of the boys as an apology for my last post. they are very serious musicians and are very handsome. again sorry for any upset caused.

view all 100 comments

inhalerfan3 hahahahahhah who is holding the gun to your head rn girl?

yourusername im sure I dont know what you could possibly mean (totally unrelated robert keating can be kinda scary)

bobbyskeetz now that is more like it

yourusername @bobbyskeetz @elijahhewson am I forgiven yet? can I come for pints now

ryanmcmahon_15 I think your last post ..slayed? yourusername THIS is why your my favourite and why you had first spot in the post 🖤 inhalerfan3 hahah did you choose the order based on who you like the most rn yourusername @inhalerfan3 👁👄👁

inhalerfanupdates

liked by inhalerfan2 and others

inhalerfanupdates GUYS I'm just back from my inhaler show and im shaking look at this pic yourusername took of my friend and I with eli! BEST. NIGHT. EVER.

view all 10 comments

inhalerfan 1 no way that is adorable, yourusername is one of us with the 0.5

inhalerfanupdates she was literally so nice aswell! they had walked by us so fast and I think I was so visibly upset, which she spotted and made eli come back over to us! inhalerfanupdates she was also chatting to us for a little while after, talking about tour and all she comes across real genuine <3

inhalerfan2 they're dating right??

inhalerfanupdates I really think so after seeing them walk and interact together. its been so hard to tell cause shes always joking and is so close with them all. inhalerfan3 they have to be dating they're my parents.

yourusername

liked by inhalerfan2 and others

yourusername Europe 1 Three amigos 0

view all 200 comments

inhalerfan 4 you are literally traveling around europe, freeloading off your famous friends. so so ungrateful god

inhalerfan2 hate to break this to you but being mean to one of his best friends / photographer is not going to get Eli to date you! inhalerfan3 haha girl no need to be so meannnn

elijahhewson I told you we should've skipped drinks

yourusername it was for the plot hotstuff (liked by bobbyskeetz)

bobbyskeetz why is the world so loud??

ryanmcmahon_15 *three idiots

(liked by joshjenkinson_ and others)

lewevans told you they get tired and moody

yourusername oh wise man 😭😭 you were so right

inhalerdublin

liked by elijahhewson and others

inhalerdublin she loves to joke around and despite what bobby says, its the very reason we love her.

but our photographer for the europe leg/ our bestfriend yourusername is flat out working, making sure we look our best and coolest, we remind you to be kind in your comments towards her - eli, ryan, bobby and josh <3

comments have been restricted

yourusername BOYS im so unwell this is so sweet

joshjenkinson_ the GOAT

ryanmcmahon_15 ❤️‍🔥

elijahhewson our girl!

bobbyskeetz also she plays taylor swift on repeat when shes sad so please, i can't hear this is me trying again

yourusername we can't listen to the strokes all the damn time robert! yourusername also you asked about the folklore love triangle so stfu

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername been great annoying bobby with pda for the last 3 years with you <3

have loved tagging along on my superhot boyfriend on tour and taking super hot (and super not) pictures of him! only a few more shows left xx

tagged: elijahhewson

view all 400 comments

elijahhewson 3 years but i'm still not your favourite singer 💔

yourusername write an album like notes on a conditional form and you can take that top spot baby <;3 inhaler1 babyyyyy i love them your honour

bobbyskeetz great the world knows, can you stop kissing in front of us now.

yourusername just say you're lonely, it'd be quicker xx inhaler2 LMAO i love their friendship

evehewson wait I thought I was your favourite hewson...

yourusername course you are, this is a pr xx elijahhewson 🙃🙃 yourusername 😅😅

inhalerfan3 brb just gonna go take a bath with my toaster xx

joshjenkinson_ the hardest of launches

yourusername litch dont have the energy to lie anymore loll

---- finito----

if you made it this far I love and appreciate you so much! all the forehead kisses xx

[angsthology]

new year, new name, and a vacation dump — rvstw

yeah this series is still on btw

THE KANGAROO VS THE WORLD

rockstarporsche

liked by te1enovia, paularon_, and 7,826,938 others

tagged: rockstarenergy

rockstarporsche new era

see all 4,754 comments.

schupastry HELLOOOOOO??????

backbiteroo 50kidgaroos fucking LOOK

50kidgaroos backbiteroo WTF 😭😭😭 I SAID ROCKSTAR ROO ERA AND PORSCHE TOOK IT SRSLY

backbiteroo 50kidgaroos u literally manifested this 😭😭

mickschumacher looking good 😎👊🏻

liked by rockstarporsche

bearmanbrawn oh theyre new style is gna eat so hard this year i just KNOW

buttoncunt porsche rlly stood on business and im here for it

h44milton let the car be not only sexy but also fast please 🙏🏼🙏🏼

te1enovia YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

selvnika te1enovia cringe

te1enovia selvnika get a JOB

te1enoviyuh

liked by atticusingh, selvnika, and 393,763 others

te1enoviyuh yayayayaya first stop 🇻🇳

see all 736 comments.

selvnika shrimp spring rolls u always get me 🙂‍↕️

liked by te1enoviyuh

roopysnoopy she was WHERE

mclarenovia my homeeeee 🥹🥹 anh yêu em, wouldve loved to have bumped into u 😔

te1enoviyuh mclarenovia hehe next time

mclarenovia te1enoviyuh HELLO???????? NEXT TIME WHAT?????? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

te1enoviyuh

liked by alex_albon, atticusingh, and 373,625 others

te1enoviyuh stopped by albon central 🫡🇹🇭

see all 625 comments.

alex_albon 🫡🫡🫡 looks like a lot of fun

gaslytv alex_albon “looks like a lot of fun” and theyre all pictures of food... he gets it

te1enoviyuh alex_albon i did hehe thank youu

buttoncunt te1enoviyuh no hint of malice or threat towards alex... girl blink twice if you need help

-> liked by te1enoviyuh

te1enoviyuh

liked by mickschumacher, atticusingh, and 273,526 others

te1enoviyuh heheh next stop 🇰🇭

see all 386 comments.

sunnyodas atp i think she did an entire *actual* asian leg of a tour

te1enoviyuh

liked by atticusingh, fernandoalo_oficial, and 472,725 others

te1enoviyuh im running out of caption ideas i cant keep saying next stop 🇮🇩

see all 472 comments.

wdcalbon INDONESIA MENTION RAHHHHHHH 🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩

a/n; i hate tumblr so bad guys i keep accidentally posting this after every time i edit this on my phone (this is one of them) and im way too tired to make ANOTHER post to keep in drafts so here. also this is js an intro to 2024 anf theres gna be a second part for this catchup | taglist; @treehouse-mouse @disneyprincemuke @naezpy @leilanixx @judespoision @vellicora @bborra @woozarts @yl90 @kazuha-pista-badam @tallrock35

[z00r0p4]

Tbh im kind of tired of how many "another reason not to have kids" comments I see like. Some chick was talking about how the belly button piercing she got at 13 wasn't a good idea after having 2 kids and someone threw that in the comments.

Like listen I don't particularly want kids, but also I don't view them as a cancer on society??? My reasons for not having kids are more to do with my own health, the hypothetical childrens' overall health and the fact that I don't have a great parenting personality. Not because the kids r gonna spill grape juice on my white couch or get into paint or some shit.

What's worse is I'll see the PARENTS of children post videos of their children making messes or something and Caption it "In case you need a reminder to use protection/ another reason not to have kids" and it just astounds me. Like, as if your children won't one day stumble across that post???

They basically roll out of the wombs with ipads now so like. They're gonna find it somehow. You're basically just fast-tracking them into mental health problems. They're people too u know???

I come from a very loving family so I can't even IMAGINE what i would feel like if my mom and dad had said shit like this (even jokingly) growing up.

[frogofalltime]

25.02.2024

ough. this day was so hard. i debated even writing this, but i think keeping a daily diary has been helping me process stuff, so i'm sticking with it.

i got up around 10am and ate breakfast. i was procrastinating washing my dishes and getting dressed, when i received a sudden message from my mother.

it was extremely long, basically an essay. she had found out through her sister that i've been identifying as trans. and she was extremely upset. i won't go into details because it's very transphobic and probably triggering for anyone to read. but yea. it hurt a lot. probably more than anything else she's said in the last year.

then she called me and when i picked it up she was just sobbing into the phone. i had no idea what to say or do. she kept asking me why, saying it didn't make sense, that i was and always will be a girl. she was so happy that she had a daughter and now she feels like she's lost me. she said she doesn't know me anymore, the way i dress isn't "me", and i am making myself look ugly and trying to be something that isn't real. she said i have stepped away from islam by surrounding myself with queer non muslims who are pulling me away from the right path, and i had rejected God's guidance. that made me cry too.

i tried to explain that these things aren't black or white. my therapist told me that growing up and figuring out who you are involves trying different things and seeing if they fit or not. so when i was younger i tried to cure my gender dysphoria by presenting femininely, since i thought it was the best option i had, but it didn't fit. so now im trying the opposite, and it does feel a lot better. but she said i am being so extreme, why can't i just be Me, why do i have to have a label or call myself a boy. and i had no idea how to answer that.

she told me i can't trust how i Feel, feelings are just feelings, so i have to have faith in God. like how she doesn't feel comfortable in hijab either, but she wears it anyway because she believes it's what is Right, and that where she will end up the next life is more important than how she feels in this one.

in the end she said she had no choice but to talk to my father about this, and i begged her not to. he is a million times more homophobic and transphobic than my mother so if he finds out it will be so much worse. she told me that he would definitely find out sooner or later if i don't change my ways. so i decided to remove the pronouns from my instagram bio, block even more people, and change the captions on some posts to appear less queer.

finally she put down the phone and i was left feeling Horrible. i messaged @etherealspacejelly and my best friend from school and my childhood best friend (who is also trans). it helped me to calm down a little, although i was still panicking very much.

eventually i managed to eat some lunch and get changed out of my pyjamas, because i couldn't stand being stuck in my room alone with my thoughts. i went to my friends' house at around 4pm and they asked what was wrong so i showed them my mother's message. they were sympathetic and supportive, but i still couldn't stop thinking about what she'd said. from her perspective, everything my friends and therapist and doctor etc tell me is wrong because they don't have islam as a guide. maybe she's right. i'm terrified.

to cheer me up my friends made sure i ate, and played some games with me. i did some sewing, and we watched my neighbour totoro which is one of my comfort movies, but i couldn't concentrate.

robin said i need to be more careful because things like this keep happening. and he's right, i should've stayed closeted, but it all feels so unfair. my friends can all explore their gender identities and sexualities and express themselves in different ways, so why can't i ??

i finally left the house at 1am, because i was so tired and robin had already gone to sleep so i couldn't stay the night. also they're burnt out at the moment, i didn't want to add to that with my own burdens, so i went home. i prayed, got into bed, and tried not to cry. i think i fell asleep around 2am.

i feel so alone. honestly, it looks like my only option is to detransition. i will just have to make the best of an awful situation and live as a woman forever. i see no future where my parents will accept me being trans. even if they disowned me i don't think i could live like that. and i am so scared because my mother is right. this is not compatible with islamic teachings. and i dont know how to reconcile any of it.

[kusundei]

okay chat. slightly infuriated. i will back up this individual

HIGH HIGH HIGH. emphasis on their caption. like i get u fr. i WAS. this person too and it sucks sry but like seriously talking to someone who just cant help themselves is so tiring. im a hypocrite cuz i was this person and bless everyones souls who talked to me despite it but god? hello? sorry i know my experience isnt the same as everyone but u know ur not gonna get better if u dont try. ahain ji agree cuz of like, comfort in sadness, some people dont wanna get better, etc etc. but im just saying eventually u’ll have enough. this is morbid chat but if u havent killed urself by now then does thag not say something??? u’ll get tired. tired of hating urself and tired of being sad all the tome and depressd and hating ebrrything it will hit u ebentually. u people who say this just havent hit that point yet (and maybe some people just never will but thats a whole different discussion and not to add fuel to the fire but also maturity?)

like chat be mad all u want but thats judt kinda how it is. its not a savior complex usually it often comes down to just caring? wanting to help ur friends cuz theyre struggling? like the idea that yeah i dont have to help u but i want to because i care. for me it goes down towards that toxic empathy struggle again cuz i cant control that . i carw so soosososo much and its so sickening to me to see people hurting and okay. sure maybe i can stand back but you know like……. it sucks. just sayign. like now i kinda understand how it is coming from both sides and maybe this is a thing of selfishness cuz like “u shljld care more ab the other person!” but thgs what im doing??? i care so much ot makes me sick. its just like uuugh i have so much shit i cpuld say ab this but naaah im tired its jjst like… you’ll get there eventually and youll understand and if u dont? you’ll kill urself im being so fr. u will die in that hole bcuz thats where you’ve put urself

[cpunkwitch]

i think major film companies should make less visually intense versions of all releases for ppl with epilepsy and other sensitivities. i think it should be standard practice and i think movie theaters should show them in their own rooms w less intense carpet on the way in and whatnot.

and on tvs and streaming platforms they should have like a reduced contrast mode. cause im really tired of everyone getting away with inaccessibility. captions colours brightness video descriptions everything needs to be regular practice. we arent extremists for wanting that i think.

what are your thoughts?

adding on

they should also just in general lower the brightness on their screens and lights in the theaters esp when they turn the lights on after movies. and not the damn white led lights, the softer yellow/warm lights that are so much ficking easier on our eyes.

my sensitivity isnt as bad as most people but i still get bothered by all these things to an extent and can sympathise with ppl who struggle with it more intensely.

people should absolutely make versions and accessible places of productions that dont cause eye strain issues- to say the least.

yes flashing lights, bright colours, intense saturation etc can add to the experience of watching a movie but when theres people that literally get migraines, nausea, seizures and so on there needs to be something done about it. the easiest answer is removing/lessening these things from productions outright or making an edited version without them so its much easier on people

by productions i mean games and shows not just movies. this can be plays and musicals too.

and making environments more accessible like adding spaces in theaters where YOU CAN PUT YOUR DAMN WHEELECHAIR because you cant use the fucking fold seats, keeping the lights dim and fewer, using softer/less cluttered carpet designs, not having an overwhelming amount of bright ass screens etc can be a huge help to people

absolutely needs to be common practice, literally not in any way or form is this some kind of extremist thing, its asking for things to be accessible so more people can experience entertainment too.

we deserve to see there/play it/be there/enjoy it just as much as people without these issues.

i also like your idea of seperate show rooms that are lower input/stimuli and remote settings for things to make things safer to view.

i would be so happy to pick up a remote and hit a few buttons so i can mute contrasts and light flashing in some way on whatever comes on/im watching on the tv

also the news should be easier to read theres so much text with half of it moving on the screen that i can never fucking tell whats going on so i never watch the news unless my parents already are.

[namelessmewmew]

Old Art Archive Part 3.

Original captions under the cut.

Art Dump 1:

Digital versions of some traditional sketches I posted in sketch dumps previously, coloured these a while ago but didn't want to upload them separately so put them in a batch like this.

1. Probably going to change their species a bit, probably a pegasus or Maybe a kelpie? Maybe just a merhorse? Don't have much personality wise, just a old horse/some kind of equine that lives by themselves in an swamp/marshland. [have to choose which] (Shades and Shadows)

2. A mershark, tends to spend most of his time in the deep ocean [mermaids in this universe can switch between legs and an tail and between lungs and gills, most mermaids tend to spend almost half/half on land and in the ocean]. However when he is on land he almost always goes to the restaurant mentioned in 3s info so has got to know is friends with them both.  (Explosive Dusk)

3. One of the most frequent visitors of the local library, massive lover of marine biology [as well as microbiology], is the type of person to have alot of biology fun facts to give out,  currently studying to be an Marine Biologist and works part time at her girlfriend's parents beachside restaurant. Girlfriend is a professional skater? [I think that's the term for someone that skateboards?] (Hangry Munch)

4. Bug/Horse hybrid? [Was an lab creation]. Not sure on specifics of species as I do like the idea of bughorses but worried about making them too similar to mlp neon changelings [which I do like alot but don't want to just copy]. She is an scientist [botanist] herself and she makes a bunch of cool plants [like walking venus fly traps, glowing floating roses etc]. (Shades and Shadows)

Individual Posts:

Wanted to have nicer art of Craft and Meghan so I could make toyhouse profiles for them. [Changed Craft's hair a bit] Really like how this came out but probs just going to draw very sketchy art for a bit after this as this was tiring [or at least physically I have been 100% sh/t for the two past days so this was tiring for me right now]. and yes I actually drew proper hands for once, using my own hands as reference. to dead to say anything about the character right now sorry or anything of otherwise real substance.

More of the usual slight redesigns of characters [make the colours a bit more saturated]. They have alot of forms they like taking and generally like long worm like or just a slime looking type forms. They are an apple farmer. That's all I have to say uh.

Literally just an digital version [though I guess chibified] of the only other drawing I have of them, drawing has been very hard lately, idk maybe I think a new mouse, maybe my wrist is messed up, maybe physically im just not doing well generally. maybe its just to hot and shit. Desert robot, idk if sand corrodes metal, but I guess you would some type of clothes just so you dont get sand all stuck to you and also metal gets hot doesnt it so if you are a robot like a walking computer ish you woundt want to overheat to much or you wouldnt be able to mentally function much.

Need to have some more bird characters, particularly crows and pigeons [and maybe some plague doctor style characters]. Pigeons are really cool birds, and always have very nice colours. Originally was going to go with arm wings rather than separate wings and arms that are in the same style as there legs.

Just a little doodle [Not the happiest with how this came out] Dangles [what the above character is] can't naturally have hair [as in head hair like humans] but can have hair by using wigs or magic. The background is meant to be a specific place, though I need to uh think more of how it is meant to look and flesh it out I guess. The above character is unnamed currently. Wonder what they are doing in this strange place?

Design on the left [blue one] was adopted from https://toyhou.se/Badvibez and designed by https://toyhou.se/jaspering, changed their design a bit [and although I'm not 100% sure what their original species was I don't think they were originally a wolf]. Also changed sparklepaw's [temp name for one on the right] design a bit. Wanted to draw something cute and simple so here are sparklewolf girlfriends. Like the way this came out alot, especially how colourful this is.

Only had the design of their head figured out last time I drew him but now have the whole design figured out. Also they are now named Nyapolitan! [originally named them Neopolitan as I go by Neo but I think I like this better, plus its a pun : D and also its just a one letter difference from Neapolitan].

Still have alot to improve on/learn but happy enough with how this year went art wise. Don't have much else to say like I did last time so eh. Template: https://www.deviantart.com/asterianmonarch/art/2021-Summary-of-Art-Template-Blank-896812770

New icon of Nya that I like alot more than the first one. [also made a new banner but might change that up a bit later]. oh and also going to post a lil thing in a hour or so as thats when its midnight here :]

Happy new year ^w^

Title: Ghoul Dog Concept Design As soon as I finished this I had a new design idea for them in mind, oh well I will get that down and out my head soon enough. Maybe later today, got a very sudden artistic motivation boost, which is odd as before yesterday the last time I drew was the on new years. "Ghoul Dog" is a placeholder for the species name as not all of them will be dog like. Might just call them Spoke [Ghosts in afrikaans], though not sure. Though probably will be an afrikaans word as the species name as I have some other related species that also have afrikaans words as species names.

Three Gif Nea Icons:

Cassidy and Casanova are now personal ocs rather than my fursona and sona. Just don't feel as connected to them anymore, though I have been brainstorming a new "sona" [more a mascot really] and went for a neapolitan ice-cream themed shapeshifter named Neopolitan [This is their cat form!] [Neo as I mostly have been vibing with the name Neo lately]. This icon may be a temp one as most of my socials don't allow gif icons [like tumblr], but not sure. 

[lorestory0]

the loud guy with a vehicle shut up for a few days. just a few days of silence and my ears had recovered enough that a volume of 30 was loud enough to hurt again and i could just relax with my headphones off. i have no idea how my ears recover so fast but it was for nothing because the sound is back. i cant take it anymore and almost considered trying to kill myself with my sword because maybe that would hurt less. luckily i am a coward and so i am still alive. but if that noise continues, being a coward might not be enough to stop me. im clumsy and my sword is dull there is no way id be able to do that fast enough to not get caught. but with enough insanity, nothing matters. thats a scary thought.

what even was that tho? just happened all of a sudden and it was loud enough to shake the whole house like that guy has a noise making addiction and had to let it all out (and then continue) the human lives on the other side of the forest and still shook the house. the entire house.

and what the fridge was the "gooey snap" i felt in my head? i usually only have that after hours of crying but it was particularly unsettling when i had been uncharacteristically not depressed.

also a twitch that covered my entire head and shook my headphones what the hek

my forehead and back started itching from the whole house vibrating is being that loud even legal? dude's all the way on the other side of the forest.

music and anime is some the things that are the best at calming me when my issues get out of control how the fart do i make use of that if i lose my hearing? i hate violence. i do not want to lose control.

if i lose my hearing id still feel the stupid vibrations so that would not even end this.

how the frik do i watch anime without ears? even if i could read the stupid tiny font of the sub my eyes are too everywhere to read. also who the frank is even talking. even when i squint really hard theres no name assigned to the caption so who the fanny is talking? and pausing every second to squint at what may or may not just be the same thing i just got done reading is no way to feel happiness.

loud car human needs to stop. i aint even had a chance to get good sleep in the few days of peace cuz if i sleep every day like a human i have nightmares. and guess what ive been tired as frog since that guy been loud almost a year. i used to be able to sleep a few hours and stay awake for 2 days before getting tired again. now i cant even go a full day without being called by the portal of closed eyes.

and the portal seems to have been cursed

[abrakeydabra]

dude im so tired of men omfg

i met this guy at an event and we talking photography. im like im a graphic designer and make websites. hes like cool i need a portfolio. im like sweet i lov making money. we exchange instas. he says i could be a model.

later i checked out his insta. losta model shots. some events but still ppl focused. concerts and the like. i see one i really like of this girl. his caption "thanks for the support, it's all possible because -".

i look at her profile. shes posting him a bunch. "my handsome man" this. "i love you" that. last one with him was january. but most recent post like 1 day ago is her with celeb. he also posted the same picture of him with celeb. same day same event all that. her bio has "💍 2023".

photo in wedding dress with him. and photo of him calling him her husband.

im like SWEEET. mans got a WIFE i dont have to worry about him tryna date me.

we're talking on insta im like what field of photography you wanna focus on. hes like actually i really want to do film. we talk about film and ideas. hes sending me a pic of a moth. we never talk portfolio website.

mans heart reacting to some of my messages. man said "i knew i saw something in you" when i responded to his film idea. man replys faster. and replies late into the night too.

mans film idea is based around relationships. film idea ends with the guy leaving the girl.

man JUST MESSAGED ME saying "should i ask you out for coffee sometime"

i sWEAR TO GOD. SHE HAS "💍 2023" IN HER BIO. ITS NOT LIKE ITS AN INACTIVE ACCOUNT AND SHE HASNT UPDATED TO REMOVE THAT OR SMTHN.

THIS MAN WANTS TO DRAG ME INTO HIS CHEATING

HIS BETRAYAL OF A NEWLY FOUNDED MARRIAGE??? ?

JUST PAST 1 YEAR MY GUY?