#im so stretched thin
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JUST SO YA'LL KNOW I LOVE READING REBLOGS AND REPLIES TO KID LEO AND I WISH I WISH I WISHHH I COULS RESPOND TO THEM ALL CAUSW YOU ALLA RE SO FUNNY AND AMAZINF AND WONDERDUL AND ALWAYS LEACE GREAT COMMWNTS I PROMISE I READ THEM I JUST GET OVERWHELMED AND SOMETIMES MASKING TO REPLY IN A WAY THAT DOESN'T SEEM OUTRIGHT DISMISSIVE IS REALLY HARD CAUSE EVEN THO THEY MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY I JUST DONT HAVE THE WORDS TO EXPRESS IT OKAY GOODNIGHT THANK YOU TO EVERYOBE ALSO THIS APPLIES TO MY NORMAL POSTS I PROMISE I READ THEM I JUST LITERALLY DO NOT HAVE THE WORDS TO REPLY
#2 am thoughts#feeling emotional about it tbh#and a lil guilty but i know realistically i just cant stretch myself thin to reply#even tho i want to#but im v v v v heavy masking irl rn cause of my living situation so if i dont have to online its better for me#masking me and unmasking me are unfortunately two v v different people and its kinda depressing to sww#see the tone shift when i reread comments on old stuff#my own tone shift btw#you all are awesome
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my boss started scheduling me 12hr shifts without asking me if i can even do those. ignoring i said i can only work 6hr shifts(im disabled) ignoring whether or not im even available to be there (i have been cancelling plans for weeks because she keeps making me stay late) ignoring the fact i just explained to her i have to help take care of my dad now
i GET we are understaffed but girl you are about to be more understaffed
#im not quitting... the jobs nice enough when im actually working the schedule i agreed upon#but like if she keeps stretching me so thin i will snap
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HEY I'm not dead I'm aliiiiveee!!!!!
*steps out of my coffin and everyone gasps*
So, reason why I haven't posted in a bit is because,,,
Come on gimme a drumroll!
🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁
LITERALLY EVERYTHING IS IMPEADING ON MY ME TIME!!!
I CANNOT PICK UP MY TABLET AND DRAW WITHOUT SOMETHING ELSE BEGGING FOR MY ATTENTION AND ITS IMMENSELY NAUSEATING.
*starts ripping up my surroundings with foam shooting out my mouth*
HHHHHhHhGffrgrrrrrggh
#yappercentral#yeah sorry#bit of a vent thjs has been going on for months now and it feelsmlike my own artistic ability is slipping through my fingers#i barely get anytime to draw ans when i do i just draw my ocs cuz its what im most comfortable starting out with#but like u guys wanna see other things also! and its what i want too!!! i get that!!#hgghghg its so annoying grrrrrr i just wanna rip up everythingnin my ROOM AAGHHGGHHGHG!!!!!#i know the real ones who follow me will love it when i post no matter how long it takes for me to snd i love u guys for that ^^#ok bye <3#im literally stretching myself thin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Finally saw Wicked today. I fear it is, in fact, actually all that and a bag of chips. Like it is genuinely that good
#ramblings of a lunatic#storywise i actually found that they were stretching act 1 a bit thin and it showed in the pacing#but in terms of execution of the musical numbers and aesthetic quality of the sets/costumes/etc???#ohhh bitch. I'm sorry im so fucking seduced by john chu's vision of oz#i am also on team 'this bitch should be more technicolour' but I'm also not a lighting/cinematography guy#like i like Pictures and Images but I'm shit at lighting + composing film shots so yknow. stones and glass houses and everything#anywayyy i love the wizard of oz im a little obsessed w the wziard of oz and all related properties maybe. maybe#god idk if I'd actually enjoy it but i would be really curious to read the book version of wicked. i know it's incredibly different#not just in terms of focus and content but also in terms of being very dense and reportedly a lot drier#but also i do want to see his vision very badly. like when he made oz a surveillance state?? that's smart! it's plainly in the og series!#it's just treated as normal there#but anyway yeah back to the musical i am NOT ashamed to admit i got full body chills during defying gravity#there were parts that were so. sincere and self serious and melodramatic that i couldn't help but love#like YES enough!! with the self referential ironic humour crammed into everything!!!#linger on a moment for far too long and make me sit uncomfortably in the saccharine melodrama!!! it's good for me!!!#the people want big budget fantasy musicals gang...they want razzle and dazzle and heartfelt song!!#and i agree with the ppl. i AM the ppl#wicked movie. good. i enjoy#might just be riding the high of watching it but like idc I'm allowed
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sorry no....I would attempt drastic measures if kuro ends soon lol.
like I know yall keep insist it'll be over but stop it!!!! 😭 like we still have the main mystery with ciel's parents, the queen, whatever undertaker is doing, the unresolved mess with lizzy and soma, o!ciel reuniting with the servants, confrontations with many other characters and what??? yall hoping it'll end on his birthday???? no!!!
and even if some of plot threads can be tied at once, imagine how rushed it all be. didn't we spend 6 years on the servants alone!!
and to be fair, I'm side-eyeing yana more than yall. I honestly believe this all could have been more steadily approached. which is why I'm hoping the blue arcs is actually just the start of kuro's shippuden era, not the beginning of the final act. so please yall please....
#like it makes more sense the blue cult and twin reveal#was just to get the story moving in different direction#rather then end the story...#there's just so much to be developed in my mind#im not asking yana to stretch the story thin#i just want her to not restrain the plot#kuro is already pretty off the rails already#might as well go out with a bang#kuro#kuroshitsuji#b.txt#yana toboso
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You alive man?
Just wanted to check as it's been bout a month or so since your last post
no i'm dead but don't worry about it. tis the season and all that shit ya know?
(all that shit includes, but is not limited to, seasonal depression, art block, retail and food service worker hell, the election, 5 stress induced nightmares in the space of a week, managing a new relationship [first time], living in a capitalist nightmare, etc.)
[more rambles in the tags, as i am often to do]
#its been two months anon im so sorry#ive been doodling but like not getting anything done at all#there is just nothing going on upstairs i am beyond burnt out but i don't know how to take breaks and#its really fucking killin' me folks#don't do this to yourself learn to take breaks from things that are draining you#lean to manage your batteries and dont stretch yourself thin to make other people happy#i know this and i keep doing it to myself anyway#i dont like to vent here so i wont go into much more detail than what i already mentioned in the body and all those tags#just generally exhausted and having a hard time finding the energy to draw and be happy with it#outside of that had a loss in the family that hit way harder than i thought it would#there has been good to though stress and good things#gonna travel outta the country for the first time ever even if it is just up north but im really excited#half the reason im being assassinated by work is because i need the money so i can take this vacation without worry#as well as having a partner for the first time since.... 5th grade? if that even counts?#i feel like a whole years has happened in the span of two months i'm dying chat#not art related
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going forward i'm probably going to implement a rule where i write at a max 3 instances of any given ship. i want to make sure that i'm giving my writing partners as much as they're giving me. i encourage those who are shipping with me or want to continue shipping with me to let me know because as i get around to working on my carrd i'll probably add a list or something.
#i may make exceptions for close friends but#as far as plotting ships goes i don't want to#stretch myself too thin#i wanna make sure that those who DO decide to ship with me are not only enjoying my writing with them#but enjoying growing the ship together#i am still working out who's cool with like me sending them ship art / inspo songs and the like#so im just#vibrating#ooc.
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EA canceling The Sims 5 because they don't want "players to have to restart a decade’s worth of gameplay after ‘THE SIMS 4’" is like if Rockstar said they're canceling GTA 6 because they don't want players to restart 11 years worth of gameplay after GTA 5
#ts4#ts5#fuck ea#fuck the sims 4#im soooo heated about this#my initial plan was to pirate the entire sims 4 catalog of bullshit after the sims 5 released#because they wont remaster the sims 3 which is the peak. like all time best sims game fr fr#and the sims 4 is boring as fuck. buggy as shit. and just overall bad#the fact that they've taken the fun from the sims 3's live mode and stretched it thin across $1200+ worth of expansion packs is insanity#and so now this shits just never gonna end because they're making bank off of the cash cows pumping their money into this game#just to get the bare minimum#absolutely insane
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I wish women's jeans werent made out of absolute garbage material
#not fallout#kal talks#i bought 2 sets of jeans yesterday#actual levis#and the material was so thin#i also hate stretch jeans but thats all they had#so disappointing hbajsvjsvgsv#i wiuld get mens jeans but idk my measurements and im more hippy than i used to be
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i hate "dark content" as an umbrella term man i just like gore and body horror why do i gotta be grouped with ppl writing incest fetishes or something
#the term “dark” for fiction is so varied to begin with to the point that using it as an umbrella term#feels like im stretching these subjects too thin#or something. idk what phrase to use to explain what i mean#waba talk
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you’re not repressing your emotions, you’re just a little silly! and the thought of getting out of bed makes you want to cry but that’s unrelated!
#still firmly in struggle town lads#but now im also having a pain flare on top of the exhaustion#my ribs and back are Fucked#and genuinely the idea of getting up to pee or get something to eat is stretching me thin#just a couple seconds of standing hurts and the fatigue is so bad#and i hate! that theres a little voice in my ear! going well if you dont get up and dont eat youll lose weight! so at least theres one plus!#like fuck me if that isnt disordered as hell#but its fine#its fine#itll be fine#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#spoonie#pots#postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome#chronic illness
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My friends are so nice to me??? I love them???
#another fulfilling day where im tired overworked overwhelmed but also full of love for my friends#i love my friends#one of my friends swung by to visit me while ive been recovering hehe#it was so so nice#and one of my friends is giving me more song and media recs hehe which is like. yes. yes. yes.#i am going to fall in love with you /hyp#a little overwhelmed and smitten rn#having a pea brain moment but today has been crazy and i have been catching up with a lot of stuff and meeting deadline#life has been a bit hard in regards to that but im sure life will be fine life will turn out ok#when i get a little better i need to bake so much for my friends#but also trying to not overstep and stretch myself out too thin which i might have today#I don't care though i feel so. tired but happy rn.#im obsessed w my friends it's not even an overstatement at this point hehe but oh well#this semester or next maybe I'll try something new but for now i just want to go with the flow and have fun for now#im having fun im happy i don't want to worry about stuff and i don't want to be scared which is why! im not gonna catch feelings for anyone#im gonna love my friends a lot and love myself a lot and it will be enough to carry me through!#it gets really hard sometimes when a lot of your friends are dating and a lot of ppl around you are dating but im not gonna get fomoed#went out and saw my friend and her partner walking hand in hand and ykw im happy for her#i do get a little envious abt. having like. a safety person. and stuff like that. but. hng. i have multiple ppl i can rely on#it's just currently they're all not around that's all#and sometimes i just really crave a hug but those times will pass!!!#anyway i miss my friends i love them but im doing much better than last year now#i had a moment of wondering why i tolerated. some stuff from past partners and i realized it was probably bc of the friends i had around#sometimes when your friends treat u well it. idk. shines some light on your perspective#im really grateful for my friends bc of that#they make sure i dont become worse lol#kk rambles
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overstated sentiment perhaps. but the point of it all is sitting in a bar with your friends
#literally whenever im just sitting in a bar with friends i'm like i think this is it. i don't think there's really much beyond this#everyone's a mess rn it's everyone's worst week one friend's moving in 4 days one friend's stretched SO fucking thin#all of us have like a 0 per cent shot at academic success and all of our phd contracts are running out#but like. when i a certified weirdo freak am like can we please toast to my dead wife izzy hands. they're like girl absolutely#maybe it's all not so dire#breisgau hochschwarzwald gothic
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im only 3 fully done frames/drawings in for one of the zam animatics i promised a while ago already but it's looking great!!!!!! RAAAAAAAH OMG I LOVE IT 💥💥💥
#thats it thats the post#its all the babygirls dancing bc im an EXTRA extra bitch and i made a simple(ish....) choreo to make them dance to .#AND IT LOOKS SUPER FLUID !!!!!! WOOHOOOOOO#anyway#demon rambles™#animatic#prince zam#princezam#i SWEAR im working on this thing ok??? im just getting stretched thin between this and other projects that pop up on the noggin. so#(it's also taking longer bc i redid the frames i ALREADY made before bc they looked like SHIT)#(i have a color scheme now. it's fine 👍👍👍)#(lowkey thanks to jesteriisms bc i studied their out of touch thursday eclipse animatic)#(really good animatic. go watch it .)#(so if the colors looks similar it's bc of that lmao)
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i'm so sorry, i've been so inactive lately...! this time, the reason is not personal struggle/distress. i have been incredibly incredibly busy with studies, work, and life changes, but they are good changes! i am really doing better now, and i am so so thankful to the Lord; i am so happy that i finally feel myself growing closer to Him, and my love for Him grows every day
i wanted to really sincerely thank everyone who prayed for me or sent me nice messages after that vent i posted a while back, it means so very much to me. the ppl on here are so kind and lovely! <3 (also, i am not ignoring my asks- i'll respond as soon as i have the time to give thoughtful input!)
this blog is not abandoned and i will return to regularly scheduled Christposting sooner or later!
hope you are all doing wonderfully, mutuals, and God bless you all!
#talk tag#i feel like i have a lot to share regarding the developments in my faith (how much stronger it has gotten)#i havent looked at tumblr in a while bc i feel so stretched thin irl#but in a good way#like im convinced things are hard in a “God is putting you in this situation for a reason and you will learn and grow from it” way#i got out of some bad situations i used to be in and things are getting better all by His grace#and i trust Him to guide me to a place where things are less chaotic and more okay!#i am so glad my faith was “tested” for a bit cause i feel like you have to experience that as a Christian at some point in order to#actually notice and appreciate how subtly God works if that makes sense
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I forgot how fucking sad romancing Anders really is good gods
#this guy is like 2 inches from killing himself and im all thats holdi g him together#and as he hides more and more things i wonder if it's worth it to be his shelter in a storm if it means#i have to take the beating of the storm#brighid hawke#has been going through it herself#shes so angry now in the third act#she loves all her friends so much and feels like she's tearing herself apart to keep them all with her#tbh ive always thought not romancing anyone made for the saddest hawke#but romancing everyone is also REALLY sad in its own way#my girl is stretched so thin like not enough butter on hard bread
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