#im so sick of my dad making a token effort but clearly struggling to connect with me

[parasprite]

ik she'd never play favourites and stuff but god its like. depressingly clear how much my mum prefers hanging out with my cousin over me. they have outings and regular movie nights and go on walks together and run errands and do chores they do literally everything together. and honestly its not just that like... even when im hanging out with the two of them i know she's more focused on my cousin. like she takes an interest in his interests. she asks him about spanish all the time but doesn't give a shit that i'm learning portuguese. i feel like i bore her whenever i try to speak. i always wanna let him ride shotgun the rare times im out with them because she can hold a conversation with him but not me. and whenever i'm alone with her she just treats me like a receptacle for her dumb fucking rants about facebook drama and then she seems so surprised when i have good advice for her even though i Always have good advice. she treats me like her talk therapist. she never thinks about my needs or my life or my interests. not that i even wanna tell her about it.

and like. for my cousin's birthday she got him a paranormal activity 6-movie blu ray box set because it's their favourite film series to marathon together. like they've rewatched it a bunch of times. they discuss their fan theories and everything. yknow what she got me for my birthday this year? nada. which is PORTUGUESE for nothing. god and they had that spontaneous weekend partying in london together and then a few months later she fucking planned a trip and went to sussex alone even though she knew id been wanting to go to sussex with her for literal years. she kept saying she'd take me then she didn't. what the fuck.