#im so lazy god help me this is the bare minimum bc i wanna start writing
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It took me that long 2 finish a sketch,,,,
Atp I needa js quit
I hate everything
I needa get more drawings done omg
Let's hope I can at least draw something of karen n tricia 4 Halloween
Rant underneath the cut cuz I no aint no one wanna read that but I need it out of me
If I don't do at least that I'm gonna freak out and I don't even know Its hard 2 even think about. I don't even know what I'm gonna do. But it's not gonna be good.
Sometimes it feels like I'm forcing myself 2 draw even though it's the only thing keeping me sane. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't draw. I always seem like I'm at my worse when I get artblock or js can't draw bc I don't have the supplies.
I feel like such a terrible person rn I hate this sm I can't even start to explain how bad of a person I am. I'm a terrible friend, child, sibling, person. Why can't I just try as hard to keep my friends happy like they do me, I'll never be the child my parents need, I couldn't even try to help my sister when she was in pain earlier, I'm so lazy and I can't do anything right. Hell, I can barely function or stay in my own body half the time.
The only thing I have going for me is drawing. The only thing that proves I am worth ANYTHING is drawing. I'm not good at school, I'm not good at flute, im not pretty, I'm not good with social situations, I don't have many friends, I can't cook, I can't bake, I can't write. The only thing that I am good at is drawing. If I fail at that too then i have no reason to even be alive.
But I do nothing but whine and complain all the damn time. I never even try to make it better or get better myself. All I do is sit and cry. For what? Pity? I don't even know.
I can barely even do simple tasks, I can't load the dishwasher because of the left over food n shit, I can't eat fucking RICE just because i don't like how it feels in my mouth. I can barely get up in the morning, I'm barely able to do the BARE MINIMUM. I suck at showering and brushing my teeth like the disgusting creature I am.
And I'm so sensitive oh my God, I cry over the stupidest shit EVER. And I get upset over small things that no one else even gaf about. Because what do u mean I got upset at the fact I have 2 wake up my mom tomorrow, I've been doing that everyday since the 6TH GRADE. I'm not allowed to get mad about having to do something I've been doing for years
An in all this time I spent ranting I could be actually drawing but no I just gotta bitch and moan about things that are MY FAULT and no matter how much I say that I dot seem to even try to change.
What the fuck is wrong with me??? Why can't I just be normal???
I need an exorcism or a factory reset or something. I don't know how much longer I can go on living like this.
If u did read this sorry about the long ass cringe rant. I really needa learn how to keep this 2 myself instead of spewing it to strangers on the internet
HE LOOKS LIKE HE HAS A BALD SPOT 😭
OC by my mutual @//metatork on twt
I tried drawing him the same way I draw ike
Everything looks wrong I'm so fold this I the sketch (even if its taken over half an hour)
The funny thing is the most interaction I've even had with this mutual b4 2day was liking eachother's posts and then I saw a post of them asking 4 ppl 2 draw their oc and now I'm doing that.... Like if u give me an oc from either mdp or sp n tell me 2 draw it I will (hint hint 😉) sorry... That was stupid 😖
Oops I went overboard again... Sorry 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖
Man wtf am I doing using "..."
Ok ok I'll shut up now
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TAG CHECK.
#( 001. HELL'S WONDER ! —— SELF - PROMO )#( 001. HOT HONEY RAG ! —— PROMO )#( 001. RAT HOE'S TALKING ! —— FLEX )#( 001. TALK TO ME HARRY / WINSTON TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT ! —— ASK )#( 002. WELCOME TO HELL ! —— IC )#( 002. YOU'LL BE HEAVEN BOUND ! —— MAIN VERSE )#( 003. HEY DEMON GIRL ! —— VISAGE )#( 003. ALL THAT JAZZ ! —— MUSIC )#im so lazy god help me this is the bare minimum bc i wanna start writing#ill fix it if needed i just h A T E tag checks ok im !!! not original !!!!#( 003. SOUL ABLAZE WITH PASSIONATE IDEALITIES ! —— MUSE )
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very rushed very shit intro comin @ you all but here goes nothing ! i’m felix from the gmt tmz, i use he / him pronouns, and im gonna power nap any minute now because one thing you should know about me is that i’m eternally on the verge of passing out from minimum exertions during the day. this is my pain in the ass eunsu: not even going to sugar coat it - he’s the human personification of a headache dumpster fire all in one beefy package and i really don’t even blame your character if they just . ignore his presence because, me too !
under the cut there’s some information about him if you want to get to know more about him regardless. smash that mf heart if you want to plot.. and i will get to you ? sometime ? its an ambiguous promise but i keep them, discord is also an option so just ask if you’d prefer to plot on there. eun’s about is here but no plots as of yet because life is hard and We Cant all Have Everything
aka im lazy
* ☾ ✧ * º ━━ is that KIM JONGIN walking about ? nope ! that’s just EUN SU CHO. & i’ve been told that they work as a INFORMATION BROKER ! apparently, they are TWENTY FIVE ( 204 ) years old . some people say they are a CISMALE, DEMON ! HE is very CULTIVATED & INTUATIVE but also DECIETFUL & MENACING. i wonder if they are just as odd as the rest of us . ⇢ SYNOPSIS. MBTI TYPE / entp, the debater ZODIAC SIGN / scorpio ENNEAGRAM TYPE / 7w8 KINSEY SCALE / 3 MORAL ALIGNMENT / chaotic evil / neutral HOGWARTS HOUSE / slytherin ⇢ AESTHETICS.
goosebumps raised and feelings of growing dread, the dark corner of a room where light doesn’t reach, silver pocket - watches with dead batteries, the scratch of a record player needle, flares in the sky, bad ideas coming to life, half-assed clapping when it’s required, figures dancing within the shadows & a smile you shouldn’t trust .
⇢ OVERVIEW
literally anybody: when are you free? eun su: im forever imprisoned in my own personal hell so i am never truly "free" but i don't really have plans all next week except for monday
this is eun su, and will y’all believe me if i say he used to be a good egg before he turned into the rotten egg i’m presentin y’all with today ?? i kid u not.. bs free zone. he did once .. have a hort he was born to a cult of witches, his twin brother absorbing all the magic that was meant to be equally distributed between them in his mother’s womb, which pretty much left eunsu as the black sheep of the family. said cult had been living on a small, near enough desolated island for literal decades, entertaining themselves with magic, seeking out knowledge, observing the unassuming populace, and toying with other supernatural creatures who dared cross their paths. unfortunately for eunsu’s family, tragedy struck when one of his aunt’s tried to over throw the high priestess ( his mother ) in their coven. unyielding in her position and untouchable to the magic she was exposed to, her sister went about other ways to break the woman’s spirits, dabbling in black magic predominantly to achieve her goals. eunsu’s brother was, thus, cursed before he was even born with an incurable heart defect that would see him dead before he reached double figures. eunsu’s mother was broken not mourned over how much he missed out as on a child: but she mourned for the fact that he was the only child that harboured any magic in their veins, the only child that could’ve carried on their lineage. queue entrance of eunsu and his Whats the Worst that Could Happen Attitude. being young and naive, thought he could’ve been able to solve it by himself, solve the issues and earn his mother’s lacking affections. eun had heard about dark vessels that could miraculously grant wishes through summonings. though he didn’t have magic in his veins he had a fire in his heart, and after all, demons cared not for who or what they fed from: so long as they appeased their hunger. all it wanted in return was a good, pure soul, and that’s what the demon stole from him before it mended his twin brother’s heart, giving the boy a new lease of life that wasn’t intended for him from the start. pity that eunsu died before he got to the age of twenty, following a quick and hungry fever that overtook his frail body and too soon turned deadly. there was no surprise that, come judgement day, he was turned away at the gates of heaven, in exchange for becoming one of lucifer’s own.
as a result of being eternally cursed with immorality and a tainted soul, he's lived some hundred-odd years and is coping by making the current populace in jeonseoul suffer along with finding purpose in digging out the secrets of his past life, mayhaps trying to find the demon who cursed him.... which could definitely be a wc.. and strengthening his abilities as a demon.
his personality is a bit insufferable; eunsu keeps himself distant and cryptic, because he likes it that way. he's a real weirdo ( if u have ever watched hxh he’s hisoka.. THAT weird ) that's hard to forget: completely mischievous, dramatic, and malicious to boot. some days he's waxing poetic about the futility of having a sense of justice and the next he's using his demonic powers to make some innocent tourist think they're hallucinating as they attempt to walk into a steady flow of traffic.
ultimately life's a game to him and bih.. he’s here to have fun ! he's outlived his actual family and friends ( well, aside from his brother who he barely remembers, prolly be a wc if anyone’s interested ) and he's not looking to get attached to anyone. it would be great to Die because it’s his forever Mood but he also gets furious if anyone tries to actually expel him for real - so he'll simply prod at the world and its people until he gets the reactions he wants.
fair warning: it is a pain to genuinely care about eunsu and not many people will wanna do it. he comes and goes into people's lives as he pleases, stops reaching out once he's bored and only ever grazes the surface of a relationship based on its worth or his curiosities, innocent ppl, cute ppl, etc are just gonna be eaten up by him then dropped.
the people who will be closest to him are doubtlessly other demons ig ? but he also hates y’all too so.. don’t get too friendly like he’s not here to make friends he’s here to be Jeonseoul’s next top Demon. also since he died sumn like 200 years ago it’s possible some wizards / familiars knew of him and his coven, it’d be super interesting for someone to have known cute human eunsu in exchange for chaotic bastard demon eunsu
⇢ MISCELLANEOUS
since he’s a young demon, his horns are small and his wings barely span about two inches above his shoulder bones, he got itty bitty bat wings lbr he’s kinda pissed abt it. there’s tattoos over his scars from clashing with other demons / hunters / angels, but his devil’s mark lining the back of his neck, performed by first demon who took his soul, has never faded away.
he also works as an info broker, which ties in with the fact that he’s a contractual demon ! it's more of a hobby than a job, something he does for kicks and to restock his gambling money and alcohol money, but he offers a helping hand to solo clientele for private cases if need be, just remember to bring your negotiation skills because his manipulation skills are a1.
he's well-versed in witchcraft even if he can’t actually possess the abilities that actual witches can. while hardly the mentoring type, he could be convinced to equip people with his knowledge of latin, spells or dark magic they want if he's interested enough. then again he might decide to screw them over for kicks so ask him for favours with caution.
for someone who carries a ton of spite and secrets, he passes as an easygoing, casual literature major on the daily to disguise his true intentions. find him at the university pretending to be a student and failing miserably at it like edward’s thousand year old ass in twilight
he cheats at the casino with his demonic powers but does it infrequently enough to pass it as luck. play games with him at your own risk. casinos are one of his favourite places but he can really be found anywhere with ease but some other places he frequents are: beaches, libraries, museums, bars, etc !
he'll get on people's nerves, but getting him to care to the degree of hate is another story. living this long has numbed him; people don't surprise him anymore and he doesn't care to spend time thinking about others. the secret to getting him to turn deathly serious is as simple as telling him you can tell that he was once a good person - because the cheesy truth is he was. he just convinces himself that he's given up trying to remember his human life and finds it easier to live like he’s dead.. yknow which he is.
romance makes him queasy, he's a spiteful old bastard and the concept of sweet love rubs him 100% fictional. there's someone he fancied before he was cursed but i'll save you the story: that's a distant dream now.
he might quote romantic works or put some pretty words together but he's fake as Fuck. if he notices someone innocent and unsuspecting crushing on him they are in so much trouble. he'll kiss their hand then twirl them right off a cliff. corruption kink central right here laid ease
as of rn he’s trying to master how to teleport and shadow control but he really is like on level one and he’s got to get up to level 50 to achieve even a fifth of what these other demons can do
edit: i totally forgot to include eunsu’s ‘demonic’ title after he was banished to the perils of hell. it’s ironically just saint, and he goes around using that bc it’s blasphemous and a big ole middle finger to god himself. nobody will know his real name, but if there’s an off chance that they do, that’s a massive threat to eunsu and he’ll get his Snipers on Scene
tl;dr:
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