#im really excited for 4 cause its been a while since i watched it and my partner has never fully seen the ending

[rivaiin]

we finally finished replaying mgs1 last night and i had completely forgotten liquid is prolife

[luv3rx]

" Patience "

─ LEE TAEYONG X F!READER ♡

─ Taeyong fucks you after getting distracted by you while working on his mini album˚◞♡

─ 1.7k words

─ Smut, dom!Tae, Sub!reader, artist bf!Tae, praises, pet names(Baby and princess), choking, slight rough sex, slight breeding kink?, Unprotected sex.

─ A/n: IM DEFINITELY HAVING THS ALBUM ON REPEAT. ITS LITERALLY SO FIRE. Plus the concept photos literally have me on my knees for this man. Maybe This is just a little drabble. I was writing this at 3-4 am so I was tired asf. this is my first ever smut so please tell me if I did well or better. I enjoy feedback.

Taeyong 🔛🔝

Taeyong was really hyped about his new album. that's all he would talk about. He would constantly show the lyrics he worked on or would let you listen to the beats.

He would take you with him to every concept photoshoot and let you take some pictures of your own. He enjoys when you show support of his passion and excitement. He always tells your support makes him want to work harder and push himself as far as he can.

Of course he does try and make time for you in between. He wouldn't want to ever leave you out. You were the only thing keeping him moving and giving him motivation.

You were his antidote to keep him pushing and you were all the feedback he needed. No one else's opinion mattered except yours. If you liked it he would continue and if you find like it he would instantly scrap it.

He would constantly insist in using your voice for ad-libs but you would always deny and say you wouldn't want to hear your voice in a song when you already hear it enough. He was very upset about it but did didn't want to push you so he just decided to pay someone else to do itm

︶︶︶︶︶︶

“Babyyy! How much longer are you gonna work?! Im bored..” You complained sitting in the lounge chair behind Taeyong in his studio as he was working on another one of his songs for his album.

He was instinctively focused. He hadn't looked away from his computer screen yet. He could hear you whining behind him from one ear being uncovered by the headphones he wore on his head.

“Im almost finished. Just maybe a few more things I have to do. Be patient for me, baby.” He pleaded because your whining was making him want to just quit was doing and go to you but this album was something he had been striving for awhile now. He needed to get it finished, now or never.

“But it feels like we've been in here for hours and I need you..!” you whine even louder stretching yourself out on the lounge chair. You layed your head on the arm of the chair and groaned as he ignored you.

You sit up and watch him glare at you through the glass of the studio mic room. You glare right back him and roll your eyes. You would have been on your phone but he told you to leave it home so you could watch him work and motivate him but that backfired. You sigh heavily and decide to leave. You picked up your shoulder bag and heading towards studio door but the call of your name from Taeyong cause you to turn back around.

“Baby don't leave yet.. I need you.. I can't focus without you..” he implied as he finally removes his focus from the computer and towards you. He fully removed the headphones on his head. He put on his best begging face. He deep down did need you to focus but he also wanted you to just be near him.

“Well your more focused on that stupid computer. i think you need it more than me.. but I guess I'll stay.” You pout and sigh as you walk back over to the lounge chair but Taeyong calls out to you again.

“Dont say that ever and No, don't sit there. C'mere and sit on my lap, since you need me so bad.” He backs his up his chair and pats his lap for to come sit. He was in desperate need to be close to you right now. He was more desperate to be finished and be able to be with you too but he didn't wanna rush. This was an important project for him.

You hesitantly sat on his lap and he instantly wrapped his arms around your waist and held you for a bit. He took in the scent of your perfume and groaned.

“You always smell so good baby. Your making me crave you more.” He whined burying his face in the crook of your neck. His hands held on to your waist as he continued to take in your perfumes scent. He would be lying straight through his teeth if he'd say that this wasn't slightly turning him on.

He was finally able to push away his dirty thoughts and instantly got back to work. You on the other hand was needy for him to touch you and fuck so you decide to tease his a bit. You would slightly just rub yourself against him, to hopefully distract him.

You were slightly shifting on his lap and eyed even his slight movements. Taeyong was clearly unaware of what was going on your head but when you began to rub against he felt his breathe hitch in his throat. His hands stopped moving along his computer. His whole body pretty much came to a halt.

He tried to hold back any lewd sounds that was tempted to slip out. His breathes were shallow as he tried to keep himself focus and ignore any sexual frustration that was getting pent up right now.

“Y/n. Stop and sit still for me. Your driving me crazy right now..” He hissed. Both of his hands instantly went to hold your hips, his nails digging harshly into your hips. He head was hidden in the crook of your neck. You could feel his warm breath against your neck.

“But, Tae.. I need you baby.. really bad..” You whined. Rocking down against him again. His nails dug deeper into your hips as he breathes became more shallow. That's when you felt it. His hardened dick was poking against your covered cunt. He smirked at your sudden mood change when you felt him against you.

“Why so quiet now, baby? You were very vocal about how you wanted me so bad. I'll give you just what you want.” He started kissing your neck and grinding against you. He was mesmerized by the moans and whimpers that left you. It only made him want you more. He was quick to slide his hands up your skirt and rub your inner thigh, he wanted to tease you and make you beg for it.

His hand went higher up your inner thigh just close enough to your cunt. He looked up at you with his lustful gaze. He needed you badly and this was making his just as needy as you. 'Fuck it.' he thought to himself before pushing your panties to the sides and sliding 2 fingers between your folds, collecting your slick. He hummed and sucked your slick in his fingers, groaning.

“I would let you sit on my face but fuckk I'm absolutely do needy to feel that pussy around my cock.” He backs up his chair and makes you stand as he slides down his shorts. His dick immediately springs out from him not wearing boxers. He hissed from the feeling of his dick finally being free from it's containment. He stroked his dick a few times before motioning for you to cmere. He made you hover just above his dick and looked up at you with a big dough eyes.

“Tae please just fuck me..!” You whined slightly sinking down on his dick. You didn't really have to tell him twice. He instantly slammed himself into you. He didn't even give you enough time to adjust as he was instantly fucking in n out of you. He had wrapped his arms around your waist and had his face buried between your chest.

You bounced against him trying to match his utterly fast thrust but failed miserably as he was fucking you like an wolf in heat. He was drowning in your moans, Turning him on more. He was completely ignoring your pleas for him to slow down. He was to lost in his own thoughts and he wasn't gonna stop until your leaking with his cum.

“T-Tae, I'm gonna cum! Don't stop..” You begged. He instantly stopped and pulled out of you. You whined at the feeling of your orgasm being denied and the feeling of being empty.

“What are you-” “Just changing positions, princess.”. He replied after cutting you off. He picked you up and brought you over to the lounge chair and layed you out on your bag with you legs spread. He instantly slipped back into you and started pounding into you once again. He wrapped his hand around you neck while the other held your thigh. He couldn't help but lean down and kiss you harshly. Your lips plump and soft against his.

He pulled away from the kiss and lightly squeezed tighter around your throat. He watched as his dick slipped in n out of your cunt. He smirked when he watched your eyes in the back of your head, clearly fucked out from the way he was destroying your cunt right now. His dick was hitting your cervix repeatedly from this angle.

“C-cum.. I'm gonna cum..!” was all you were able to muster out before you released along his dick. You were completely out of it. Taeyong smirked to himself, proud that he was able to fuck you out of your mind like this. His pace didn't seize just yet. He slipped out of you and quickly slipped himself back in.

You were an total wreck under him from the overstimulation. his pace slightly seized as he felt himself about to cum. He pumped in n out of you a few more times before he felt himself release his seed inside you. He let himself sit inside for a little bit before pulling out quickly and pulling your panties back over to cover your cunt. Even tho it was an amazing sight to watch is seed drip out of you but he wanted your cunt to savor it.

He fixed himself back up and sit on the couch next to you. He knew you were completely out of it and had fallen asleep so he pulled you back into his lap and held you. He wrapped his coat over your shoulders and held you close.

He had completely forgotten about the song he was working on. He was to deep in thought and to focused on you. He didn't want to wake you so he decided to head home later in the morning.

He just sat there and held you. He kissed your cheek before dozing off along with you..

꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱

[crowentity233]

Don't Tell (part 3)

Mako x Reader (secret relationship)

Part 1. Part 4. M.list

Mako x Earthbender reader

You being touch starved for years suddenly have an intense crush on mako after he put himself in danger for you and the safety he provides following the attack. You both keep your relationship under wrap from the krew. You both don't want to deal with everything that follows them finding out.

You walked out of your apartment. The night sky was above. it was almost time for the mover. You met with Mako. You handed him his keys that you still had from this morning.

"So, good news. I am free to go to the firelily festival." Mako took the keys. He put them in and revved the bike. You sat down behind him, holding on.

"Really? Im so excited!" You wrapped your arms tighter around him as he drove around.

"I'm thinking of ditching the mover and us going on our first date."

"But, people are going to start questioning us." You warned.

"Let them. Its none of their business, and we can come up with an excuse. It's the only time we will know where everyone is, and we can go out without watching our backs."

"But Bolin..." you trailed.

"He isn't in the mover, so he won't be upset about it." He assured.

"Alright. Where do you want to go?"

"I'm thinking of a nice dinner date and then a walk on the beach."

"The Yue Bay Diner?"

Mako nodded. Changing his direction to head to the diner. Your hands held tight to his waist as he sped up. He took a few turns before he slowed down at a stop light.

He dropped his hand off the bar, resting it on your knee. His thumb rubbed back and forth. Every chance he had, he wanted to feel you with him. He didn't want to ever remember the feeling of not being touched. He hadn't had a mother or father to hug him or kiss his forehead before bed. It was something that troubled him. He wanted to have love. He wanted to experience his love language with every opportunity. He was deprived of it for so long.

You gave it willingly, not knowing what it did for him. You hadn't even considered he was the same as you had been. He was Mako, the hot firebender cop. Certainly, you were competing somewhere at some point in time. You had always known he had good looks, that was never a doubt. Little did you know, He had the heart broken mentality. He had cut himself off and shut out the world from his heart because he didn't know what the world was like outside of survival. He had to see the world from a new perspective. His upturn in life was just starting to catch up to his thinking. He was no longer in survival mode. He was living and not just paycheck to paycheck. He was thriving, and he wanted to share this newfound life with someone.

Your hand rested on his inner thigh while the other wrapped around his chest. You held him at the stoplight. Mako has heard about your long-term relationship before Kuvira. It was supposed to be a marriage. The man had different views on Kuvira. He wanted to continue in the destruction of the earth kingdom. You had broken off the engagement and ran far away. You fought with the krew against your ex. Mako still remembers the cry he heard when your ex died in battle. You still loved him. you just couldn't stand behind someone who was causing such havoc. That was his downfall he chose to stay in the havoc, leaving you without a future after the battle. You had been single since then, trying to heal yourself from the pain.

Mako grabbed the bar again as the light turned green, speeding again towards the diner.

Once you were there, Mako grabbed the door to the diner, holding it open for you. You both got inside, he placed his hand on your back, and you both walked to the outside seating. The small of your back felt the warmth from his hand, and tingles rolled down your spine.

You both sat down at a table. The waves crashed, sending the sounds out to the table. The moonlight was bright in a full moon, and the stars twinkled with reflections of the light in the ocean. The air was crisp and cool.

A waitress came and took your orders.

The nerves began sinking in. This was technically your first date since losing your ex-fiance. It was so casual before with Mako, just some physical intimacy that you were craving. This level of vulnerability and commitment seemed much different. Your heart was beating faster. Your attention turned to the waves.

"It's a nice night." Mako spoke softly.

"It is. You know I'll never get over seeing the ocean for the first time. I grew up in such a small town. There was a small lake, but it was nothing compared to the ocean." Your lips grew in a smile thinking of the memories.

"I grew up here. Bolin used to beg me to go to the beach with him when we were younger. I was always busy hustling, but every once in a while, we spent time here."

"I always forget you worked for shady shin." You leaned back comfortably, feeling less anxious. Mako was easy to talk to.

"I try to forget it myself. It wasn't a happy childhood, but it had its moments."

"I know Bolin is thankful. You did a good job raising him. He was always very helpful when we were with Kuvira. He is very funny and looks out for his friends. I've heard Bolin talk about his perspective, but what about yours. How was it for you?"

"It was tough. I learned a lot about the streets. It's hustle or get hustled. There wasn't much between. I'm glad it's behind me. I'm glad I turned my life around. I took a chance when we became probenders."

"I hate that I didn't get to see you play."

The waitress came out and set out your plates. You both ate a few bites between talking.

"You didn't miss too much. What about you what was life like before republic city."

"It was good when I was younger. We lived in a small village. we weren't super wealthy, but we had enough to get by. I still remember being with my friends talking about our future in the town. Kuvira stopped by our town, and she was enlisting warriors to accompany her. I joined with my boyfriend and we traveled around the earth towns."

"Do you miss him?"

"Of course, but every day, I get a little closer to not envision what would've been. For the first few months, I was grieving not only him but the life we had created and planned together. I thought maybe we could have reconnected after he saw the evil in her, but it never happened."

"I understand. I don't know what it's like to lose someone you plan a life with, but I know what it's like to lose someone you love." He reached his hand out and laced your fingers in his. "It's very hard to lose someone no matter who they are to you."

"I've been grieving it for a long time. I wish I could have been at this point sooner. If I hadn't been so blind on grief, maybe I could have seen you this way sooner." You were at a much better place to talk about the death of your first love.

"I would have loved to have this sooner, but I think it's better that we took our time just being friends. I needed to reevaluate myself. I was so used to being unstable in life that stability was a big adjustment I had to make." Mako admitted.

"You know, I always thought you were seeing women and just not telling anyone." You giggled.

"I wasn't. I spent a long time just focusing on myself and making sure I was in a good place to bring someone in my life. I spent so long taking care of Bolin. When he left, I actually had time, and I wanted to make something of myself to give a better life than what I had for my future family."

"That's really sweet, but there's no way. I don't believe there wasn't at least one. You're a firebender, hot, and a cop. That's a girls dream. You have to have women all over you." You pressed.

"No, if they were, I didn't notice. I was too busy. When I finally was ready to find someone, you just said something that I just couldn't stop thinking about. You didn't know it, but It stuck with me." Makos hand squeezed yours.

"Really? I never thought you had any thoughts like that about me. I always thought you'd fall for a woman at the station. I actually made a bet about it once with Korra. Which I lost because we kinda spied on you..."

"That's not creepy at all." He chuckled softly.

"It was just from the station to your apartment. I bet her that you were going to bring home a woman. She bet that you wouldn't, and I was sure you would because it was a significant firenation day that firenation usually spends with a significant other. That was before I knew you didn't really know much about firenation customs. I always thought you might have picked up on some somewhere."

Mako smirked. "No. Not much at all. You know more than I do."

"My village had some people that were from the firenation. They decided to leave their nation when zuko took over. The generations kept going, and my parents had grown up with some of them. They told us the stories their parents told them. Sorry for following you. I guess I might have just been curious in the back of my mind. I guess I didn't want to believe I had any feelings for anyone, especially someone I thought wasn't into me."

"I was then, and I still am." He spoke honestly. The heat in your cheeks met the cool Seabreeze.

You both had finished dinner. The waitress took mako's cash, and you both left. His fingertips trailed your side.

He led you to the stairs that met the sand. You both walked along the beach.

"The mover is probably over by now, but I don't think they will be down at the beach."

"They are at the usual hang out for sure." You could almost hear the groups jokes about you two being together from here.

"Bolin may have gone looking for me." Mako found a spot and sat down, pulling you with him.

"I almost feel bad for not telling your brother." You said when you sat next to him feeling the sand under your fingers. You rested your head on his shoulder.

"If we tell him, everyone will know."

"I don't want to tell them yet. I had fun today, especially with them, not in on the secret. I really like it just being us without them pushing." You looked out into the water.

"Korra and Asami especially. They've been on your back since they got back and heard you were the other single one in the group." Mako chuckled.

"Do you want to go back? You can stay with me tonight." Butterflies swarmed thinking about the warm bed.

"I would love to, but I can't. Bolin is guaranteed to search for me all night if I don't show back up at my apartment."

"What's our stories?" You tried to mask your disappointment.

"I was out doing some police work."

"I had a date." You added.

"Who with?" He questioned.

"A coworker."

"What does he look like?"

"He's not a hot firebender that drives me around on his motorcycle to romantic dates, if that's what you're asking. He's just a waterbender friend that I know will cover for me."

"Should I be worried?"

"Not even a little bit." You leaned in and kissed him slowly.

His lips rushed with intensity. They led you into his lap, where you wrapped your arms around his neck. He leaned one hand on the sand while the other held your hip. He was making sure you enjoyed every second that you were connected to him. He made you feel so safe, secure, and like you were the only one in the world for him.

That night at your apartment, you slipped into bed and pulled Makos clothes out from under your pillow. It was such a juvenile way of comfort, but you couldn't help but hold the clothes close. You could still smell his apartment. The firebenders smoke was still the same as it was. It had the same notes as you were burning a stick of spicy incense in your room. You imagined his arms wrapped around you and his lips attacking yours viciously like they had on the beach. Your mind cycled through the times he had kissed you until you finally fell asleep.

[ashdiaries]

ya’ll i just had the most humbling experience of my life today so i’m gonna talk about it. for context i am in a school that is 6-12th grade, and there’s like a total of like 24 kids in the whole building (this is because it’s specifically a setting for students with mental disabilities and disorders- and is small on purpose to reduce stress levels) so some of my classes are mixed with little 7th grade boys. specifically my gym/health class because i am the “teachers assistant” for some reason (i did not sign up for this somebody save me /j) and basically i was just minding my business with my aarmau meemeows on my desk because a lot of people carry around plushies as like a support item, so i carry around my aaron and aphmau ones on days where i’m having a hard time and stuff. and this little 4 foot boy taps me on the shoulder and goes “those are from aphmau” and i had a fucking HEART ATTACK. i just stared at him and went “yea. you watch her?” and he got all excited. it was very cute. so we started chatting about it and i was like “oh who’s your favorite character of hers?” and he said ein and i was like interesting choice but ok- and we started talking about aarmau since we both knew a decent amount about them n’ stuff- or at least i thought we did. i was fully convinced we were on the same page but then he started talking about what videos he watches and it hit me like a truck. he watches jess’ CURRENT content. he watches COCOMAU. WHICH MAKES SENSE SINCE HES LIKE A SMALL CHILD BUT FOR SOME REASON I DIDNT REALIZE THATS WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT UNTIL HE MENTIONED LIKE A RECENT VIDEO. so i was just sitting there hiding my absolute whiplash while he asked me if i’d seen any of the videos he was talking about- and i confessed to him that i only like her older stuff from like 2016 and he was like “oh. okay.” HE DIDNT LOOK UPSET OR ANYTHING BUT I STILL FELT A BIT BAD. nothing was worse then when i felt like i was aging rapidly though. like oh my god i am an out of touch elderly woman. pleaseeeee someone put me out of my misery or something because that was so depressing.

but the worst part was when class was almost over and i took out my wallet so i could go buy some oreos from the school store once the period ended or something- and i forgot that i have my mcd aaron keychain hooked onto my damn wallet- so i half expected this kid to like notice it and bring it up in front of everyone. which would’ve been kinda embarrassing if i had to explain to everyone in my gym class who mcd aaron was. but alas he didn’t say anything. and it took me a second to realize the reasons he didn’t recognize the damn keychain was because mcd aaron’s design is DRASTICALLY different from cocomau aaron’s design- SO THE LITTLE BOY HAD NO IDEA WHO IT WAS. WHICH WAS SOMEHOW WORSE THAN HIM BRINGING IT UP CAUSE IT MADE ME FEEL EVEN OLDER. GOOD GOD 😭😭😭 IM CRYING LAUGHING WRITING THIS TOO BECAUSE ITS JUST SO FUNNY TO ME AND I DONT REALLY KNOW WHY?? I was just humbled so bad tbh it was very silly.

ANYWAYS YEA THATS MY STORY HOPE YA’LL HAVE FUN WITH THAT LMFAOOO

[crguang]

I want to let you know that I actually squealed when I saw that there was a new part of wasted w longing, so that was embarrassing. I giggled so much, love me some domestic fluff, I also gasped so hard at the ending that I started choking. can't believe you updated while I was in class so didn't see it until later.

kafka is so smug I hate her, I want to kiss her on the mouth so bad she's such a weirdo, but at the same time, I'm mad at her, I'll forgive her if she comes home early on my pulls tho, and also some kafka groveling, very excited to see that. also the writing is so good, like at the end I was questing everything about r's encounter's w kafka. and you said replying to someone else's ask that kafka cares atp. wdym atp? istg I love angst but I can't handle angsty endings being w out kafka also you said himeko is going to show up again, and I know that'll be funny. the cliffhangers are killing me, but I'm really excited for the next part, the plot is plotting. also the way at the beginning I literally said out loud, "oh she just got shot, it's okay."

the wanted poster is so funny, like whoever wrote it down must've seen footage of her shooting people as she breaks into somewhere and thought, damn, she is hot as fuck, and tbh that was my thought process when I watched kafka's trailer the first time.

hope your first day at uni was good! if you made me loose my 50/50 I'll---

-🌠

not the squealinggg thats so cute im flattered. it’s funny whenever yall say i post when yall are busy because it’s always 4 to 6 am here i have a horrible sleep schedule 😭 i loved writing the more domestic part cause that’s the first time they actually spend time together without sleeping together and it was kinda cuteee, if you ignore the getting shot part.

“i hate her i wanna kiss her on the mouth shes such a weirdo” is exactly how i feel about kafka im so glad im not alone… also, i meant that at this point of the story kafka already knows that she likes R; she goes out of her way to look out for them, she stares a lot, wants to help them through their dilemma and other stuff that’ll come later. in her mind shes not in love with them but she does like them. i think due to her closed off nature, a lot of the little hints of how she feels are in the way she looks at R and since this is written from R’s (sometimes unreliable) perspective, i mentioned how they can’t read her eyes yet so to them there’s no reciprocation right now. and now that they’re mad at her everything she does will feel disingenuous when it might not be. it’s tricky to write bc as readers i want people to be able to tell that kafka cares even when she’s being a little shit while also staying true to how R sees things. i do think it’ll become much more obvious starting from the next chapter tho cause there will be some grovelling involved lmfaoo.

also this was literally her at the end:

r: i will call the police on you.

kafka: i am so attracted to you right now

its funny, R is always making themself available for her and has been doing that from the beginning so kafka’s very used to this behavior and its the reason why she’s so fucking smug. but now she’s seeing a new side to them that she really likes. they’re standing up for themself and i think it’s a quality that she’d find really attractive in a person. but yeah it’s fun i love this series mainly because the idea mostly came from anons so i love hearing what yall think about it.

my first day at uni was nice!! im looking to getting my shit together honestly, i feel like an actual adult now so hopefully it helps with my mood as well and makes it easier for me to be productive cause i dont write fast at all. if you lose the 50/50 bc of me i’ll write whatever you want as consolation prize

[calkale]

Okay i watched dead reckoning again and i have words

Okay i didnt hate it id say i liked it a little more this time but i think it was just cause i knew what to expect.

I have two things to complain about. I can excuse everything else especially since i havent seen part 2 and im assuming some of the stuff will be dealt with better in that movie but these two things hurt me a lot.

First off we all know im an avid mcq podcast listener i listened to one today and he talks a lot about movies having too much explanation when its not really needed and then he went and did that. Some scenes like the first scene with kittridge was good that worked really well especially since we were waiting for the reveal but scenes like the one in venice with everyone at the party are so dialogue heavy and theres so much information to take in. This movie is a lot of action all packed together like theres always more than one thing happening at once and then long drawn out dialogue with people just sitting in a room. I dont wanna hate on mcq and i know a lot of the action probably got cut together and it was paced differently before it got cut down from 4 hours but it just seems weird to me that thats how it is.

Second is the stunts. I already said some stuff about this but im really mad.

I can understand to an extent why people love the car chase and i think toms driving is really cool but hayley ruins it. I get the humour its nice to have a funny moment but let tom drive the whole time thats what im here for. The longest stunt? in the movie isnt even fully toms thing.

The cliff jump is the one im the most upset about and i really hate how its cut. The bits with ethan and benji are too far apart and i know it takes him a long time to get up the mountain but i wouldve liked more of them. The helicopter sequence in fallout is a really good example and i hate comparing stunts in these movies but im going to. They spent time with other characters and cut back to tom doing his thing really well in fallout, i had time to enjoy what was going on and get into it before it switched unlike with this all of ethan scenes going up the mountain are just forgotten right after they happen cause they’re so short. Same with the actual jump i know how hard it is to safely film that and im assuming there isnt more of it because of that but it would’ve been nice to have a conversation between ethan and benji while ethans trying to land on the train. It was nice we still got to see tom fly at the end of the movie but it still wasnt enough in my opinion.

The train. Oh boy the train. Mcq i love you i was so excited for the train but im so let down. I know its all real but you can see where they added stuff in with cgi and the thing i love about mission movies is you cant tell when they do that if they do and in this one you could, its weird cause with the cliff jump that looked good i didnt have a problem with how the ground looked so idk why the train was so different it was probably the cameras i just thought of that fuck you mcq and your multiple cameras i love you lets make out.

[logisticalandrewthinks-blog]

Rebirth

Feel like i gotta put an edgy title, even if I'm not feeling as edgy at this moment in time. its been a little while, a little over two years in fact, last i posted was August 7th 2022, now its August 30 2024.

I've graduated university now, and was lucky enough to have snagged a job before I finished that pays decent and has alright upward mobility. I'm wondering if I should feel happy now or if that will come later? it feels all a little too empty. Although I am not in the depths of despair that I used to always be in when I posted on here, i am feeling slightly empty on is this all life is now. I'm moving in with Hung next year, so theres that to look forward to, and also the Japan trip is finally happening, of which I have done my best to plan and organise, I realise now that if I want to do something, I should organise it, otherwise nobody will do it, since the people I tend to surround myself with are very low maintenance people who therefore aren't really planners much with the exception of like Kass I guess, who enjoys this sort of thing of being organised and planning for things. But I do have Japan to look forward to I guess, I am excited for that, but a part of me does wonder if all I will do now in life is just make money so that I can go on holiday, and then work, then go on holiday. I dont really have many aspirations to own a house or even relationship stuff much at the moment, though next year maybe ill try to date again to see if im any different to it, and if im alright to date now. Its more that in my future I see other people getting together with other people, and i feel like i should follow suit, like i should have myown person that im with too, since at a certain point of our lives i assume we wont see eachother as much since they'll be preoccupied with their significant others.

All this talk of is this all life amounts to and tangentially being related to that, the worth and happiness of a life made me go back and read an old manga that I really liked when i first read it back in the day called "I sold my life for ten thousand yen per year." which is about a guy who does just what the title says, he sells his remaining life til just three months, since he has nothing to live for but not a lot of money, so why not live a few months in luxury at least. I won't regurgitate the entire story but its worth a read again future Andrew if you're still there, thats quite touching and gets you thinking about the worth and happiness of a life.

This is probably the most mentally healthy I've ever typed into my blog, materialistically things are looking up for me, I'm gonna be making decent starting wage with benefits at a (allegedly) good company, Ill be doing hybrid so work from home some days and work in office other days. I have a group of friends online that i frequently join the voice calls daily to hang out and game if that occurs or watch things. These extend to real life too, seeing friends in real life and interacting with them. Its all going in a way, materialistically very well, and yet I can't help but feel, "is this it?". Like am I supposed to just do this for another 40 years til I retire, to then just rot away and die?

Something I did do this year which I really enjoyed was travelling, I went to morocco with oogin + HABS people which was an amazing short trip, a 8/10 experience could only be made better if we were there longer, paris with chrystal and josh 💀 was a 5/10 but mainly cause of being a third wheel of a couple that I don't think should be together, maybe I'll keep a record of their thing later if I can be bothered, and also went to the peak district to try outdoor climbing for the first time, and then to manchester recently for a wellness chec kinda thing for chrystal, since she always visited us but we never visited her but i said i wanted to, so i said fuck it ill organise it, when are you guys off and so 4 of us went up north to manchester for two days. But all this to say, I really do enjoy travelling, I finally understood why those hippie sorts of people spend their entire lives travelling, I used to think oh it must get so tiring and so boring so fast, wouldnt you want to just sit down and chill? but you can! you can sit down and chill underneath a blanket of stars, or sit by a warm fire, and just look out into the distant deserts of morocco. I really enjoy travelling and I hope to do a lot more this next year.

Something else i took up in the last two years is bouldering, its a hobby that i genuinely enjoy, I've been climbing for two years, on and off, (maybe like 6 months total where i didnt climb so technically one and a half years) but its what inspired me to then go outdoor bouldering with puru armaan and yossi which was a fun trip, though it was humbling how difficult it is! currently I can climb v4-v5 indoors but i could barely only climb V0+ outdoors, which is like beginner grading, which is pathetic 😭 hopefully next time will be better.

I'm not really here to say much else, If i think of something Ill post again soon, but its 8 am and ive stayed up all night to watch LE SSERAFIM's comeback "CRAZY" which is really fucking good. Thats another thing I've done in the last two years, is gone back to my kpop roots cept this time i have the disposable income to irresponsibly spend money on merch and albums for LE SSERAFIM. the music and obsession as a hobby has really helped though, it gets me through the hard times seeing the behind the scenes and watching the live streams and hearing them talk about their lives. Bias is Miyawaki Sakura since I already kinda was biased for her in IZONE when she streamed gaming content on youtube and made videos for gaming.

I would say to end this post that LE SSERAFIM and Bouldering funnily enough have saved me, in the last two years. Two years ago i was hurt fairly badly by people who i thought i was close to, though perhaps i never was since its an online friendship, how close can a online friendship be? obviously an online friendship can be very close, but it depends alot, and it seems perhaps this was not one of those times. I dont recall if i ever actually outlined what happened from my point of view as a record, so maybe ill do that. haha i always say ill write these things and never get round to doing it. it does help somewhat though, clear my thoughts by writing in this blog, so i really should do it more often, maybe now im more mentally well ill do it???? who knows. we shall see in the next one.

I shall leave with le sserafims latest song that got released 4 hours ago, which is the cuntiest thing i have heard in a while, and will defo be a bop to remember, and so future andrew!! relearn your roots!!! go back to listening to le sserafim and rest up!!!