#im not sure if its TOO. having a laff. but also deadly serious to me. for caden to be fully celibate4life.

[gyrovagi]

so truthfully i'm pretty sure The Scenario as i have been referring to it originated in my brain as 'okay how contrived would a situation have to be for caden trevelyan and solas to have gay sex about it.' and then it got derailed as i thought about it and the scenario does not involve anything approaching gay sex. it's literally just a weird situation that nobody enjoys that changes nothing. (shrek they dont even have dental voice) caden doesn't even convince solas to cut off his leg

i've mulled it over too much though and i'm fully writing a fic (Which has made my recent google searches look fucking crazy) so now it's a canon incident for caden and is i think... if not exactly a turning point for his relationship with solas, it's Defining. if that makes sense.

anyway what happens is at some ambiguous mid-late-game stage, maybe even right after exiling the wardens, caden makes it his next priority while corypheus is firmly on the backfoot to clear out the red templars in emprise du lion. (i know judging by levels the game wants you to go here lies the abyss -> wicked eyes and wicked hearts but caden would prioritize the politics.)

this is going great! up until right after capturing suledin keep, he fucking collapses in the middle of the stairs. turns out he's been walking around on a pretty nasty leg wound that's been infected by red lyrium. there's inquisition troops in the area and a healer among them but solas is undeniably the best healer on hand (and the only mage). so now he's in the position of - for the second time - keeping this guy alive when he can really only guess about the thing killing him. the new developments are 1) cassandra isn't threatening him with execution if caden dies, though the power vacuum if the inquisitor perished now would definitely not be pretty 2) solas and caden have barely restored what can charitably be called a 'semi-functioning working relationship' after caden punched him in the face.

(varric and cole are here also. cassandra's back at skyhold dealing with the Rammys of seeker secrets and potential divine candidacy.)

after some tense aggressively polite conversations about power and vulnerability, several cryptic comments from cole, and one episode of house md, solas finally figures out that caden quit lyrium cold turkey and hadn't told anyone except his advisors, cassandra, and the apothecary who was trying to work out something to help with his + cullen's withdrawal. it follows that lyrium withdrawal has weakened him and caused the red lyrium infection to progress as dramatically as it has. solas concludes that there are essentially two options: try to cut the infection out, which being kind of out in the middle of nowhere with limited supplies means a very real risk of losing the whole leg if not dying anyway, or (temporarily) go back on lyrium, in the hopes that with untainted lyrium back in caden's system, it will be able to counteract the effects of the red lyrium. solas has conducted a few experiments that seem to indicate this would work.

caden, being the stubborn asshole he is, goes. cut my leg off then. i'm not going back on lyrium. and solas is like in any other situation i would respect your decision, if not your reckless methodology, but this has gone past obstinance into sheer stupidity. this is no mundane ailment. red lyrium is dangerous and you are extremely vulnerable at the moment. what i am suggesting is temporary and you can wean off safely this time. if you do not do it you will die. caden replies not if you cut my leg off :) i'll do it if you don't have the stomach for it. and solas storms out of the room and angrily requests varric talk some sense into trevelyan as a friend since apparently the boy (Caden is 25.) has lost his fucking mind

varric of course is not very happy about the idea of amputation either but caden cannot be budged and there's not a lot of time to wait around for him to change his mind. solas briefly seriously debates the ethics of putting lyrium in the wine. and the pasta. ultimately he decides that this isn't justifiable, even if he doesn't care that caden would never forgive him for it, he wouldn't be able to live with it himself. what he can live with is calling caden's bluff.

so solas brings in Ye Olde Thedosian Amputation Instruments and tells caden, if you insist this is your decision, very well. but i refuse to do it. you said you'd do it yourself, so you can, and i'll make sure you don't bleed to death. caden of course meant it when he said it but that's still a whole different beast from actually Cutting Off Your Own Leg. of course he can't do it.

caden fumes silently for several minutes. solas ends up watching him limp out to retrieve his lyrium kit (which caden's kept in his things, of course, because it doesn't count if it's not an active choice he makes every day). his hands shake preparing the dose but he snaps at solas when offered help. when he finally downs it he asks simply to be left alone. there's not much we have to say to each other, i think.

within a week or so, his condition's much improved. owain shows up because he received word that a) his brother was in bad shape b) there's dragons need hunting. bull came with for dragon hunting and maybe also so he could give a direct report to the qun on whatever the hell the red lyrium situation is out here. (sidenote because i've been thinking it and i need to shoehorn it in somewhere i'm not saying owain and bull fuck but i'm not saying they wouldn't fuck.) caden decides it's probably best to minimize mage exposure to red lyrium so he suggests solas head back to skyhold and help figure out the next move against corypheus. he goes on a kind of awkward brotherly dragon hunting expedition with owain.

the whole incident is never discussed again ❤️ caden is pretty pissed remembering the whole thing when solas DOES give him an impromptu amputation. oh so if you're arguably at fault for my limb requiring amputation then you have no qualms cutting it off.

(i'm undecided between caden having successfully quit lyrium by trespasser, or if it's too evil to be like. actually once the red lyrium infection set in to that point it could never be fully cured just held back by going back on lyrium, so actually caden's options are still either take lyrium or cut your leg off or die. need to ponder the shrimplications for his character and their relationship and the themes and narratives of it all.)

well i guess the inaugural post (apart from my personal friend bluebeard's wife) gets to be this whiteboy sketch that i drew and then stared at like. this is too much. i dont know how exactly but in some way its too much