#im not ready to reply to dms just yet

[norrisainz33]

bubble || LN4

☆ summary: internet sleuths find out that lando norris has been flirting with and potentially dating a relatively unknown singer

☆ pairing: lando norris x singer!reader

☆ fc & warnings: zinadelphia & slightly suggestive. you are responsible for the content you consume

☆ requested: nope!

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

f1gossip has made a post

liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, yourbff and 18,345 others

f1gossip: it’s been brought to our attention by an anonymous user that our lando norris has been caught seemingly flirting in the comment sections (for at least the past 24 weeks based off the time stamps) with a small american artist, y/n y/l/n. he’s the only driver that follows her and has been consistently in her comment section hyping her up and calling her things like “gorgeous”, “talented” and “pretty.” what do you all make of this?

view all 653 comments

user1: oh my god lando????

user14: i’ve never once heard of this girl?

user2: how did we not know about this for the past 24 weeks guys wtf

user4: no like seriously…. seems like something we should have known already

user3: wait her music is really good tho 🥹

user7: her song mirrorball??? the girl has some vocals wow

user4: just looked her up and she’s beautiful… i see what he’s seeing

yourbff: screaming my head off at this

user1: and who are you??? do you know y/n??

f1gossip: check your dms yourbff

user5: she’s using him for fame!

user4: considering we all just found out about her…. imma go ahead and say no she’s not

user6: now how do i make this about me 🙂‍↔️

ynuser has added to their story

view all story the replies

user1: ooooo orange or papaya ???

yourbff: girl you fueling the flames with this post 😂💀

ynuser: HAHA i know… i got 24k new followers in the past 2 days since you sent me that post by f1gossip and figured id have some fun with it since there’s no hiding now

yourbff: who knew meeting that guy randomly in europe 6 months ago was going to turn out like this

ynuser: certainly not me girl. remember when i thought he was some weirdo who was just trying to hit on me in the bar??

yourbff: bc he had no rizz but max and p really swooped in and saved him and now look at you 🥹

ynuser: my perfect little no rizz baby boy 🥹 love of my life 🤭

landonorris: it’s papaya baby

ynuser: i couldn’t be too obvious now could i?

landonorris: nah go on then be obvious

ynuser: oh you want me to post you?

landonorris: yeah specifically that one pic you took of us in the mirror last night

ynuser: LANDO that is for OUR eyes only

landonorris: right yes

landonorris: i still think you should post me

ynuser: i don’t know if i want to burst our little bubble yet

landonorris: fair enough baby. you just tell me when! i’ve got paddock passes, pictures, plane tickets — everything lined up for when you’re ready

ynuser: 🥹😭 vegas? we go on our little vacation after im done my tour and you’re done in brazil and then pop the bubble?

landonorris: sounds great to me gorgeous but seriously no pressure

user2: my delusions are working over time

maxfewtrell: i’m trying so hard to defend your privacy and this is what you post

ynuser: what’s wrong with the color orange?

maxfewtrell: y/n

user3: ain’t ever seen you and lando in the same room but i somehow know yall doing it

user4: you’re so pretty and your outfits eat so hard wtf 😭

user9: praying this is a new song lyric idk who these new fans are talking about lando this lando that …. i need a new song

ynuser has made a post

liked by youbff, yourfriend2, yoursibling, landonorris, maxfewtrell, ynupdates, and 54,235 others

ynuser: baby’s first headlining tour was a success! thank you to everyone who came out and sang along with me every night. i love you all dearly 🤍 and for all the newbies here, welcome 🫶🏻

view all 324 comments

user1: oh she’s so cute

user2: starting a y/n fan club rn yall

yourbff: you are making those dreams come true bb girl

ynuser: trying to 🥹

yoursibling: cutie patootie i love you

ynuser: i love you more

user23: the peoples most beautiful princess 🤍

user9: who are all you new people here

user2: lando norris fans. who are you?

user9: a y/n y/l/n fan. who is lando norris?

user2: a formula 1 driver!

user9: race cars?? i did not expect that…

user8: taking note of lando and max in the likes

user4: also taking note of their lack of a comment…. lando has commented on every single one of her posts before the f1gossip post dropped

user16: i was there last night!!! best show ever!!! love you y/n

user19: i’m obsessed with those cherry earrings

landonorris has made a post

liked by maxfewtrell, quadrant, mclarenf1, oscarpiastri, ynuser, alex_albon23, and 823,104 others

landonorris: a much needed break. vegas here we come baby

view all 743 comments

user1: i don’t know where to look ,, at the wh*re in the first pic or the soft launch in the second my god 😮‍💨😍😭😔💀

user9: ok user2… i get it now. also i’ve seen those white shoes in y/n’s posts before it’s def her

user2: omg you’re an icon for this

ynuser: dmn y’all really can identify me by my shoes?

user9: YN WHAT ARE YOU SOING HERE IM SORRY

user2: y/nlando confirmed

maxfewtrell: interesting choice of photos mate

landonorris: thanks! picked them myself

maxfewtrell: yeah clearly

pietra.pilao: 🤍

landonorris: 🧡

user2: i’m speechless

user55: hey lando idk if u heard but there’s a lookalike contest happening in my room tonight. $59 cash prize

oscarpiastri: those aren’t max’s legs 👀

landonorris: you’d be correct

user12: this is monumental

user18: my favorite sinister, evil and orange little gremlin

user14: you’re gonna cook in vegas king

ynuser had posted to her story

view all story replies

yourbff: this dress is eating in a way i didn’t think it would. i’m sorry for doubting you

ynuser: never doubt me 😤

lilyzneimer: had so much fun meeting you at dinner this evening!!! looking forward to spending the weekend with you at mclaren 🫶🏻

ynuser: omg it was so fun getting dinner with you and oscar!! i’m so so so glad to have you as a buddy in the paddock. i was super nervous about it all

lilyzneimer: it can be very overwhelming at times but we’ve got you y/n!!

ynuser: that means so much to me 🥹

user9: mother is mothering … in vegas?????

user12: are you in vegas per chance?! for the formula 1 grand prix?! for lando norris?!

user2: i fr need style tips and grwm’s from you y/n. every time you post an outfit it moves me

landonorris: in my hotel room 😈

ynuser: you got it ☝🏻 now hurry up and get back here

landonorris: trust me im hurrying

user8: i need someone to get you on a magazine cover stat

f1gossip has made a post

liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, yourbff and 19,231 others

f1gossip: confirmed! y/n y/l/n, singer songwriter, is in las vegas with lando norris for the las vegas gp. this seems to be their first official weekend out together

view all 327 comments

user2: as someone who has been deeply invested since the beginning (3 weeks ago).. this is everything

user9: my girl 🥹

user10: i truly wonder how in the world they even met… they’re such an interesting pair

user18: mclaren admin please ask him this weekend

user13: that should be me 😭

user24: ok wait guys im at the gp and y/n was walking through the paddock with lily and we waved her down because we had made some lando merch and she was honestly so sweet and stopped and took photos with us and chatted for way longer than she needed to. i truly hope she never changes she’s an angel

user21: this is so wholesome

user23: i fear she’s on track to become the people’s paddock princess in record time

user18: i have no one to send this to who will get it

mclaren has made a post

liked by landonorris, ynuser, maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri, yourbff, and 432,444 others

mclaren: this weekends most requested interview just dropped! make sure to check out the full thing over on the mclaren app 🟠

view all 329 comments

user18: mclaren admin is a y/nlando girly confirmed

maxfewtrell: he’s leaving out the bit where i had to save him from completely bombing

landonorris: 😔 you’re not gonna let me live that down huh

ynuser: idk what would have happened if max didn’t come over and stop you from explaining why you hate fish so passionately

landonorris: babe please not on the public instagram

user2: lando norizz strikes again

landonorris: love when i get asked good questions like this!

user4: king said if one more person asks me abt wdc im gonna lose it. ask me abt y/n instead

user9: this is making it incredibly hard to gatekeep y/n

ynuser: that’s my man 🙂‍↔️

landonorris: damn right it is

user13: the mutual do you know who i am is lowkey so funny

landonorris has made a post

liked by mclaren, ynuser, yourbff, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell, pierregasly, and 843,238

landonorris: thanks for being nice to me this time vegas!! oh and thanks for coming y/n 😈🏆

view all 854 comments

user12: i’m so proud of you lando

user9: wahooooo first race i watched and you won. i think me and y/n are good luck for you

mclaren: incredible drive lando! that’s our winner!!

ynuser: something about seeing you on that podium 😮‍💨

landonorris: oh you like that?

ynuser: yes 🤭

landonorris: alright podium finishes only from now on 😏

user19: oh you two are freaks i just know it

ln4: LFGGGGG

user13: congrats on the win and the hot gf 😭

carlossainz55: congrats lando!! and hi y/n!

ynuser: hi carlos 🤍

maxfewtrell: much better post mate

landonorris: why thank you. i worked hard on this one

user2: a win and a hard launch = double win for me

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated 🫶🏻

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[lovelookspretty]

chrysanthemums

drew starkey x reader zombie apocalypse au

— “you’re the gun in my lips that will blow my brains out.”

content: zombie apocalypse, death, violence, guns, lowkey actor!drew x camp counselor!reader in an apocalypse, drew saving reader & reader being stubborn asfuck i fear

authors note: me after rewatching twd asf LMAO im on s6. if u wanna be added to the tag list for this upcoming series, feel free to lmk thru replies, anons, dms, or reblogs !!

drew steps into the house, its rotting frame creaking under his weight. the walls sag like old men, peeling wallpaper revealing layers of neglect beneath, as if countless lives have been lived and lost within these confines.

he shuts the door behind him, careful not to lock it; the last thing he needs is to be trapped in here if things go south.

his heart pounds in his chest as he takes another step forward, his eyes scanning the dark corners of the room, wide and alert. he grips his baseball bat tightly, knuckles turning white against the wood.

the floorboards groan underfoot, each creak sounding like a warning, and he winces at the noise. if there’s a stiff inside this house, it’ll hear him for sure. every instinct screams at him to turn back, but he forces himself to move deeper inside, driven by a desperate hope that maybe—just maybe—he’ll find something useful.

he drops the bat to one hand, using the other to push open the door to the nearest room. the stench hits him like a wall, forcing him to pull his mask up over his nose, just below his eyes, and he glances around.

he rummages through the debris, sifting through old clothes and broken furniture. there’s nothing here but memories, and he wipes his hands on his pants in frustration.

he turns to leave, swinging the door back open, but he’s met with the cold steel of a gun pressed to the side of his cheek.

“don’t . . move,” a voice commands, low and steady. he freezes, heart racing, eyes darting to the figure standing before him. and you’re the one there, gun raised. it isn’t anything fancy, just a glock 19 you scavenged from a body at an overrun gas station weeks ago.

your finger rests near the trigger, tense and ready.

you size him up, and for a moment, time seems to stand still. drew can feel the heat radiating off your body, but once you see that he’s just some random guy, you lower the gun, stepping back slightly. “jesus christ,” you mutter.

he watches you, the gun hangs loosely at your side now, but he can see the edge of caution still lingering in your posture. your eyes are wary, scanning him for signs of threat, and he takes a slow step back, raising his hands slightly in a gesture of peace.

he can see the shadows under your eyes, the blood on your skin and clothes.

“i thought you were one of ‘em,” you say as you regain your composure. you reach down and grab the bag of cans you’d found just moments ago. the metal clinks softly as you pull it off the floor.

you don’t want to linger any longer. the silence stretches, and you know you need to keep moving, find your next shelter, your next meal. you turn sharply on your heel, ready to head out the door, but the moment you step toward the kitchen, you hear him behind you.

“hey— no, wait!” drew’s voice cuts through the silence, and he steps forward, but you quickly glance back over your shoulder, every instinct telling you to keep your distance. “one’f who?”

he quickly pulled his mask down from his face, revealing his expression—breathless and earnest, like he’s just realized how much he needs you in this hellish world.

“nobody,” you reply, your voice sharper than intended. your eyes narrow at him. he places his bat on the ground beneath him, then raises his bare hands slightly as if to show you he means no harm, that he’s unarmed, but you can’t shake the feeling that this could all turn sideways in an instant.

“look,” he says, his voice casual yet urgent, ��we should— we should stick together. it’s safer that way, right?”

you don’t falter, “not happening.” you start moving again, but he quickly intercepts you, stepping toward your path.

“c’mon,” he presses, “you can’t be out here alone. it's a death sentence. we have a better chance if we watch each other’s backs. there are worse things out there than me.” his eyes scan the room, then dart back to you, a flicker of desperation beneath the charm.

you squint at him, trying to gauge if he’s being genuine or if it’s some trick to win your trust. “and how do i know you’re not one of those worse things?” you retort, standing back on one of your legs. your mind races with the memories of the past year—trust has gotten you burned more times than you can count.

“because . . . i’m not a monster,” he replies, dropping the friendly act. “i’m just tryin’ to survive. there’s safety in numbers.” he pauses, seemingly aware of your silence. “i’m drew, by the way,” he adds, but you don’t respond with your name, keeping that information to yourself as a protective measure.

you look him over, “i don’t need a partner,” you insist, the words feeling more like a defense than a conviction.

“maybe not,” he concedes, his voice softening, and he follows you into the small kitchen, “but you don’t have to do this alone. just . . . think about it. we could cover more ground, find better supplies.”

you shake your head. “i’ve done fine on my own,” you argue. drew’s gaze is steady, not giving up on you, and it annoys you more than it should. you take a step back, glancing toward the door.

“look, we could—”

“no,” you cut him off sharply, your patience thinning. “you don’t know me, and i don’t need deadweight slowing me down.”

he opens his mouth, likely to say something else, but you turn abruptly, stepping outside into the dim light of the fading day. as you walk toward your car, a small hatchback parked in the driveway, you can feel his presence behind you, like a shadow you can’t shake off.

“where are you going?” he calls, his voice trailing after you.

“my car,” you reply curtly, not bothering to look back. your mind races with the possibility of getting out of here, of leaving him behind. but then a small voice in the back of your head—one that you’ve trained yourself to ignore—reminds you that you can’t keep running forever. maybe it would be easier to team up, to have someone who knows how to navigate this decaying city.

“do you even have gas?” he asks, quickening his pace to catch up with you, his footsteps crunching on the gravel. “we should check—”

“i know my car,” you snap, opening the door and peering inside. a few old cans roll around on the floor, remnants of a past scavenging trip. it’s not much, but it’s yours. “i can handle myself.”

“i believe you,” he says. “but gas is running low everywhere. i could help with that, you know. if you let me.” he leans against the car, his baseball bat resting against his thigh. you can’t help but glance at it, reading his mannerisms.

no.

you slip into your car. your heart races as you grip the steering wheel, torn between the urge to drive away and the nagging feeling that you’re leaving someone behind. glancing in the rearview mirror, you catch a glimpse of drew as he watches you leave.

there’s a flicker of disappointment in his eyes, but you shake it off, convincing yourself that he’ll manage. he’s resourceful, right? he’ll find a way to survive, just like he’s been this whole time anyway.

the engine hums to life, and you pull away, the tires crunching against the gravel. the sun dips lower in the sky, and you remind yourself that you can’t afford to be weak—not now, not in this world.

as you drive, the evening air grows cooler. it’s getting dark. then, ahead, you spot movement. a dog is darting between a cluster of empties and a man, barking wildly. your instincts kick in, and you slow down, eyes narrowing as you assess the situation.

the man chasing the dog doesn’t look like its owner. there’s a wildness in his eyes, a desperate edge to his movements, and the knife glinting in his hand sends a chill down your spine. this isn’t a rescue mission; it’s a hunt.

you stop the car just in time, your heart pounding in your ears as the empties turn their heads, slow and shambling, drawn to the sound of your engine. you curse under your breath, the instinct to protect the dog outweighing your better judgment. you can’t let them hurt it, and you can’t let the dog end up being that man’s dinner.

grabbing the machete from the passenger seat, you open the door and step out into the fading light. the dog continues to bark, but you move swiftly, cutting through the first two like butter, the blade slicing into their skulls. blood and decay spray against your skin, but you push the discomfort aside.

the dog’s barking intensifies, and you leap into action, striking down another empty. you feel the rush of your heart as you move, each swing of the machete is quick and precise, but the smell of rot fills the air, overpowering and sickening, making it hard to concentrate.

but you can’t stop now. you push forward, cutting through the ranks of the undead, clearing a path toward the man and the dog. you’re almost there when he notices you, eyes narrowing in irritation. he shifts his weight, ready for a fight.

he lunges toward you, and you barely dodge his first strike, the blade missing you by inches. you sidestep, retaliating with a swing of your machete. he blocks you, and you can feel your heart racing as you circle him, trying to find an opening.

he charges again, and you duck as his knife whips past your ear. you retaliate with a slash of the machete, catching him across the arm. he hisses in pain, dropping his knife, but he doesn’t back down, lunging forward with renewed fury.

you back away, but the ground shifts beneath you. you stumble, catching yourself just before you lose your balance, but he’s on you, driving you back toward the treeline. you slam your foot down, pushing against him, but he pushes harder, and you feel yourself going down.

you grapple, fists flying as you wrestle for control of your machete. his grip tightens around your wrist, and for a moment, panic surges within you. you can’t let him win—not now, not like this. with a sudden burst of strength, you twist your body, throwing your weight against him, and finally, finally, you manage to free your machete.

without hesitation, you drive it into his neck, feeling the sickening squelch of flesh giving way. he gasps, surprise flooding his features as you twist the blade, but before you can pull the weapon free, he collapses, taking you with him as you tumble down a hidden slope you hadn’t noticed, “shit!”

the world spins around you as you roll, slamming against the ground hard enough to rattle your bones. pain erupts in your head as you hit a rock. the last thing you see before darkness creeps in is the dog barking at the top of the hill, confused and agitated.

then everything fades away into silence.

you wake slowly, vision blurring as you try to make sense of the world around you. a dull ache pulses through your skull, and your body feels heavy, weak. blinking, you try to take in your surroundings.

a small fire crackles in front of you, the orange flames licking at the night air. it’s dark, and the sky above is blanketed in stars. confusion prickles at your mind—where are you?

you shift, but your head throbs with a vengeance, and your muscles feel like lead. beneath you, something hard gives slightly under the pressure: a backpack wrapped in a jacket to act like a pillow, just something to lay on. you hadn’t even registered it was there until now. as you move, the material rustles, and a small twitch of pain shoots through your neck.

god, your head hurts.

blinking again, you force your vision to focus. in your peripherals, you spot the dog from before. it’s lying nearby, tail flicking with calm awareness. oh—right. the dog. you were protecting it before everything went sideways, before that asshole with the knife and the tumble down the hill.

the hill.

the guy died.

he’s an empty.

panic grips you, and you spring up, or at least try to like the empty will attack you at any moment—your limbs are weak. your hands automatically search for your machete. first, your boot. nothing. then, the sheath that’s supposed to be strapped to your calf. but it isn’t there either.

panic claws at your chest, making it hard to breathe. your leg is wrapped in a makeshift bandage, clean but light, and you can’t feel a thing from it. what the hell happened?

your breath quickens, a desperate, uneven rhythm as you struggle to find your weapon around you, your fingers scrabbling at dirt and a few wood chips. where is it?

that’s when you hear him. “relax,” the voice says, dry. “you’re not exactly in fighting shape, anyway.”

your eyes snap to drew. he’s sitting a couple feet away, leaning against the base of a tree. there’s a bar clamped between his teeth, and he’s tearing off a piece with a mixture of irritation and exhaustion. he chews, watching you with that same exasperated look he wore back when you left him on the road.

the day hasn’t been kind to him, either; his face is lined with fatigue, and his clothes are more scuffed and dirty than before. the granola bar he’s eating must’ve come from some recent scavenging effort, something you don’t remember finding yourself. at least he hasn’t gone through your supplies—or maybe he has. you wouldn’t know.

you glance around the makeshift camp. your hatchback sits a tree or two away, its dirty, beat-up exterior looking just as you’d left it. a tiny sense of relief washes over you, though you’re still on edge.

the dog from earlier trots up to you, sniffing your leg before nuzzling your head. you watch it, feeling a rare warmth unfurl in your chest. it’s safe. you’d saved it. no more running, at least for now.

drew’s still sitting there, silent as he chews, gaze unfocused and distant, watching the dark woods. he hardly notices you looking at him until he turns slightly, catches your eye, and acts. biting down on the bar to hold it in place, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out another granola bar.

without a word, he tosses it over. it lands in front of you, and you stare at it, your lips pressing into a thin line. drew mutters something under his breath. “not much, but it’s what i could find this morning. for both of us.”

you don’t move. you’re too stubborn to accept his food or the silent offer of care. your hand flexes against the dirt, trying to push yourself to your feet. drew sees you trying to stand and quickly drops his bar, scrambling into a crouch. he moves forward with practiced precision, catching your wrists just as you’re about to collapse again. he holds your arms gently but firmly, pinning you back against the makeshift pillow.

“fuck—!” you yelp, frustration breaking free. rage sparks in your eyes, and you glare up at him, teeth clenched, breath coming in shallow gasps. drew is hunched over you, worry creasing his forehead, his gaze scanning your face and hair for any signs of new injuries or, god forbid, crawling insects.

“what the hell is wrong with you?” you spit out.

“what’s wrong with me?” he echoes, voice even but laced with exhaustion. “what the hell is wrong with you? you nearly killed yourself trying to play hero. maybe let someone help you for once.”

he lingers there, doesn’t pull back, still making sure you’re not about to hurt yourself—or him.

you grow quiet again, the fight draining from your body as drew watches you closely, his shoulders tense, but when it becomes clear you aren’t about to launch another desperate attempt to stand, he releases his grip on your arms and leans back. he picks up the granola bar you rejected, his movements resigned.

you sit up, slower this time, shooting him a glare as your hand moves cautiously to your leg. your fingertips brush the bandage. it’s secure but not overly tight. you feel the slightest prickle of guilt mixed with irritation as you look back at him.

drew meets your gaze, his jaw set. “when you fell,” he begins, voice low as he swallows, looking down at his granola bar, “you scraped your leg. nothin’ that’s gonna kill you, but it was bad enough to need wrapping. infection out here is just a different way to die. we can’t afford that.”

you catch the way he says ‘we,’ and your brow furrows. “we?” you echo, your voice colder than you mean it to be.

he sighs, running a hand through his hair. “yeah, we. as in, both of us. like it or not, we’re out here together now. you got hurt trying to save that dog, and—hell, i know you think you don’t need anyone, but . . .” he pauses, choosing his words carefully. “i couldn’t just leave you there. especially when that stiff was gonna come back to life while you were out.”

your eyes narrow, “i didn’t ask for you to find me. or to save me,” you snap, bitterness lacing your voice. the implication hangs in the air: you’d rather be on your own, even injured and vulnerable, than owe anything to him.

drew’s mouth twists. “yeah, well, maybe you didn’t. but i found you anyway, and that’s where we’re at. it’s not just about what either of us wants anymore; it’s about surviving. and as much as it annoys you, we have a better shot together than apart.”

you grit your teeth and your mind fights the idea, refusing to accept that this stranger—this person who insists on sticking around—might be right.

he studies you for a long moment, the firelight reflecting in his eyes. “you gonna tell me your name?” he asks, breaking the silence, his voice softer than before. for him, it’s been a full day since he first introduced himself, and yet he’s still left in the dark about who you are.

you clench your jaw, your lips pressing into a thin line as you consider staying quiet again.

his gaze is steady. “you think i’m a liability?” he asks you.

“i know you are,” you reply, tilting your head. “and if you keep bothering me, i might just throw you to the empties myself.” it comes out half-jokingly, but it’s a warning that carries weight—an unspoken understanding that you will do what it takes to protect yourself.

“empties—yikes. and that’s a bit harsh, don’t you think?” he replies, a lopsided smile breaking through his frustration.

“harsh is surviving another day in here,” you say. “i can handle myself, thank you very much. if you can’t keep up, then you’ll find yourself with the rest of them.” you nod around you, not an actual direction, indicating the danger that lurks just beyond the trees you can see from there.

he shifts his weight, contemplating your words. “i’m not asking you to babysit me. i can keep up,” he insists. “i just think we could help each other. you might be able to throw me to the stiffs, but what happens when there’s more than just one? or when you run out of supplies?”

“i’ll take my chances,” you respond. “i’ve gotten this far on my own. it’s worked for me.”

he sighs, clearly exasperated but not willing to give up. “you’re stubborn,” he states, but he can’t help but admit that he admires it about you. “but that won’t get you everywhere. sometimes you need to lean on someone else.”

you shake your head. “i said no. if you keep pushing, i swear—”

“you’ll throw me to the stiffs, yeah, i get it,” he interrupts, a wry smile playing on his lips. “but let me just say, it’s a hell of a lot easier when you’re not facing down a horde alone.”

you hesitate, contemplating his words. trust doesn’t come easy, not when you’ve seen what people are capable of when pushed to their limits, even though you can go for a companion out here.

“you don’t even know where to look for supplies,” you say, trying to sound tougher than you feel. you can almost hear your heart thudding in your chest, “i’ve been doing this for months. i can find what i need.”

“you act like you’re the only person in this universe who’s been practically living in a cemetery this last year! it’s getting harder out here,” he replies, his eyes serious now. “you’ll wish you had someone watching your back. you probably already have.”

you push your hands into your pockets, feeling the rough edges of the cans you collected earlier. the truth is, the thought of partnering up is enticing, but the fear of betrayal hangs heavy in the air.

you let out a reluctant breath, muttering, “y/n.”

he doesn’t miss the way you almost bite down on the name, as if even giving that small piece of yourself away is a battle. but drew’s expression softens, a slow, genuine smile spreading across his face. it’s not a grin of triumph but rather a look of someone who knows that even the smallest steps matter.

“y/n,” he repeats, testing the sound, as if committing it to memory. “nice to meet you, officially.”

he shifts slightly, his eyes searching yours. “look, just think about it. we’re stronger together. and if it helps, i promise i won’t let you down.”

you hesitate, glancing back at him. there’s a flicker of something—a potential alliance, perhaps—but the instinct to protect yourself runs deeper than any desire for companionship. finally, you turn your back on him, determined to get to your car.

“fine,” you say, voice steady but laced with reluctance. “but if you try anything—”

“you’ll be the first to know,” he cuts in quickly, a ghost of a smile appearing as the tension between you both shifts, just a fraction, toward something resembling partnership.

early tags: @iissza @lotuslovers @obsessionsarenotfortheweak @yootvi @skyslowalking @hoelesslyt @ariiwritess @beebeerockknot @0-tatiana-0

[jadeoru]

SMUDGED LIPSTICK!

O2: chivalry -> prev / mlist / next

now playing: decode - paramore 🎶

Sakusa watched her perform on that stage, surrounded by lighting that hit her in an almost angelic way; illuminating her features. She danced around like she's lived in the spotlight her whole life. And he knows she didn’t. He recognised her upon the first glance. One brief look, and he knew exactly who she was. It would take a million lifetimes before he could forget her face. He tried to deny it at first, but its impossible. Standing on that stage, singing her heart out to a punk rock melody, was the girl he used to call his best friend. The girl he ruined everything with.

He hadn’t even noticed his jaw clenching until his teeth began to hurt. His head was spinning; overwhelmed with emotions that he couldn’t even name. Relief? Sadness? Regret? Grief? Honestly, his mind was a disgusting mixture of all of the above. If he'd known that she would be here, that he’d see her again for the first time in almost 4 years, a part of him would’ve wanted to stay at home and to never leave again. But, strangely, the other part of him would’ve left at the mere mention of her name alone. It's pathetic, he thinks. He constantly prayed for moments like these, where he’d see her again: A second chance to make everything better again. Now that he has it, he doesn’t know how to process it.

It’s all so unsightly. So messy. Everything is sticky: the floors, the tables, even his hair is clinging to his forehead with sweat. It’s evident that no one in the crowd has seen a shower in their lives; he can practically see the clouds of b.o that float around him. It’s everything he hates in one place; his head hurts and a part of him wants to go home, a part of him isn’t ready to see her again. But his feet are taking him forwards, his feet are forcing him through the crowd to get as close as possible. Closer to her.

Sakusa selfishly hopes that somewhere out there, there's a universe where he didn't say those words to her; a universe where he didnt ruin everything. a universe where they were still best friends. And if that exists,

maybe there's a universe where they could’ve been more than that.

His thoughts were rudely cut short when the music stopped. Then, among the drunken banter and the crowd chattering amongst themselves, he heard her voice.

“Thank you so much to everyone who showed up tonight! We hope you enjoyed the show because we certainly fucking did. You guys were without a doubt one of the best crowds we’ve ever had!” She spoke earnestly, yet exhaustedly, but overall she sounded just so happy to be up there. He admired that; how humble she was. Her voice was sweet like honey, just like it was the last time he heard it. Despite the shouting, the shakiness of her words as she struggled to hold her tears back, her voice was always so sweet to him. As he cleared his head from the memories of her, she left too. The band had finished their performance, and most of them had exited the stage. Except for their lanky drummer, and their bassist, who were helping the staff carry their equipment. As he searched the area for any trace of her, he finally noticed the obnoxious buzzing of his phone. Shit.

extra!

sorry this ones kinda short :-[

im gonna try have the next part posted within the next few hours to make up for it !

okay fact time

sakusa never opens up to his friends

he just doesnt want to like he genuinely doesnt bother cuz he knows they wont help him

they give terrible advice

nishinoya accidentally launched his guitar pick halfway through the set so he had to play the rest of the song with his fingers strumming

which fucking HURT

non au related but fun fact!! antigun was the name of the band im in before we changed it!!

TAGLIST: @gojoed @anianurst @sleepy-writer84 @itsdragonius @yuminako @wolffmaiden @tenjikusstuff4 @juie13 @ilyless @petrus1989 @aria-in-wonderland @arachnoia @sugarrhiccupp

dm me, reply to this, or send me an ask to be added to the taglist ^__^

[prylc]

DUCKKKK

More serious notes on where I've been under the cut

So yes

I've been gone and kinda here and there for quite some time

I've just been working on myself and actually creating a life that's busy yet, I love a lot

While I do have commitments for Art raffles and other stuff. I do wanna say that I'll do them when I do them. Since at the end of the day, it is free art. But I will be prioritising art prizes ofc. And I realised im not exactly ready to commit or grow on social media for the time being too, as much as I'd like to. (it's hard to force myself to draw when I don't want to) So, as I've said before I'll jus be in and out. But feel free to chat with me in dms for mutuals ^^. I might jus take a longer time to reply. Same with tag games (tho I do wanna do them eventually LOL)

No idea how many times I've said this over and over again. But this will be the last since i just wanna clear up some stuff and get it out of my mind.

I'll still be posting art here and there that I've kinda accumulated since it didn't feel right to post art without completing prev art stuff at the time. But I've already addressed that above.

Other than that...

Thanks so much for your support and I love yall ❤️

[bunny-banana]

Hey, sorry to be random but what did Gregor do? I am a bit out of the loop it seems

hey bestieeeeee, sit back and enjoy the ride

Okay, I assume you know about the classics like the whole inapproriate suicide jokes about Finland thing, and the whole Ukraine war is a "war of two people" thing and that time he told someone to stop being greedy on ig.

But what I'm referencing tonight is his latest story from their gig. The caption said smth like "are any girls ready to rock tonight?" Many people found that 1) bit odd because that implies the entire JO fanbase is made up from underaged girls. like sir, I'm older than half this band wym "girls". and more importantly 2) its uncomfortable that he's singling out "girls" specifically. He could have said "is everyone ready to rock" but he didn't. its girls, specifically.

What I also found out today is that he apparently he texted some fans back in May his location for an upcoming JO gig and how the boys might be there too. The thing is, most of these things are minor mishaps if at all. Yes, the suicide joke was undoubtedly inappropriate, and that one time he told fans on IG to not be greedy was also rude. But all things considered, its nothing really huge yet. But there's just an uncomfortable atmosphere in the room nevertheless. He's becoming way too chummy with fans, way too involved with them through DM's which in itself is becoming.....odd. The whole "i'll text you our location thing" is also just strange, because what would the potential circumstances be? you arrive at some location, with him alone. the boys MIGHT be there (but also they might NOT be. and if theyre not, what will you do????) And the story from today à "are any girls here ready to party?".... y'know "girls" implies younger fans, who in turn are also more impressionable and manipulable. Maybe some 17 year old would have replied with "yes!! im right here!!" And on another note, as the band's PR manager, I just dont think you should say all that shit on your public profile. You're a public person, this isn't your private IG account where you can have all sorts of banter with ur mates. Saying some insensitive shit and/or fucking things up with the fans will also reflect badly on the lads even if they aren't the ones at fault.

in summary: even if he genuinely only has good intentions in mind is almost irrelevant because it just comes off as sketchy and creepy.

[sobirp]

i made a whole new blog just to post this, bear with me

i'm looking for 1x1 rp partners for discord !! i exclusivly play male character and i can do mxm or mxf! i put general info + a few face claim cravings under the cut!! i'm very open to other faces tho. Send me a dm or like this post and I'll message you!!!

>> full face claim list << >> full plot ideas list <<

"We've been playing this online game together for months and I guess we're kinda online dating now but... I'm a catfish, so..."

(Same as the one before, but inspired by the episode "Striking viper" from Black Mirror where the game is a realistic VR where you use all your senses)

"Why am I in this prison? I just did [really minor crime] and everyone else are pure evil. I know you're a grumpy, lone wolf, but can you protect me?"

(Same as above but guard x inmate)

"I just switched bodies with my sworn enemy, how the fuck is that even possible and how do we switch back?

"I know you have a reputation to uphold as a celebrity/royal, but it hurts that we can't be together in public because you're not ready to come out yet"

"of all the people i could get stranded with on a deserted island, why did it end up being you? we're so different."

GENERAL INFO

only 21+ as I'm 25+!

I'm GMT+2, but time zone isn't a problem for me!

I love comms/sms/text/chat (whatever you want to call it) rp's but I do love threading/main rp too ofc !

I usually lean towards shorter replies (half-ish paragraph), but if I'm vibing I can write 3-4 paragraphs.

I'm ok with NSFW, but it does not have to be a huge part of the plot

At this moment, I only play male characters (or nb if you have any suggestions!!). I can do either mxm or mxf!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CRAVINGS (the bold ones are the ones i crave the most)

TO PLAY: boun nappanut / bright vachirawit / choi yeonjun / john krasinski / jake sim / jung hoseok (j-hope) / kim mingyu / min yoongi (suga) / tom holland / xiao dejuna (xiaojun)

TO PLAY AGAINST:

m: boun nappanut / choi yeonjun / han jisung / kim mingyu / lucas wong / omar rudberg / xiao dejuna (xiaojun)

f: alycia debnam carey / bae joohyun / dove cameron / huening bahiyyih / im nayeon / jang wonyoung / jenna ortega / kiernan shipka / kim jisoo / rebbeca marie gomez (becky g) / sabrina carpenter

[aiwaysmoody]

fake it // mason mount

word count: 5.6k

fluff, angst

you could basically say you and mason mount were work colleagues. he plays for chelsea and your head of media at chelsea. after there had been rumours going around that he had made a snarky comment about you, as much as you wanted to call him out for it you decided you were better off avoiding him, however, mason had other ideas.

‘y/n, please my family really want me to bring a plus one and your my only option’ mason begged as he stood on the opposite side of the counter

‘no, im not being your fake girlfriend’ you dryly reply

‘ill do anything please just come, its a free holiday to italy and ill even pay for all your food there too’ mason bribes you, earning a look from you

‘free food?’ you ask as mason nods. you could never say no to free Italian food, so you gave in, earning a big hug from mason which took you by surprise. you've always hated physical touch so you awkwardly patted his back before he finally pulled away and thanked you multiple times. you eventually got him to leave and send you all the information about the flight.

your currently awfully close to mason, as your in security. you can smell his strong, footballer like aftershave which was really started to make you dizzy since it was so strong. you finally got passed security and took a seat as you waited for your flight to be called. you could feel the awkward tension between you and mason, however, it started to fade as mason would occasionally show you a funny tik tok, making you both laugh. finally, your flight was called and you were getting ready to go on the plane as you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket multiple times. mason looks down at you and frowns before you quickly silence it.

‘you should check that out’ mason chuckles and looks away causing you to scrunch your eyebrows. you listen to him and open up your phone and go on instagram to see multiple articles and dms all along the lines of:

the sun

former chelsea and england star has been caught by paparazzi this morning walking into the airport with a girl. multiple people have identified this mystery girl as y/n y/l/n, who some say also works at chelsea. the england and chelsea star has also been caught liking y/n y/l/n instagram posts recently, causing people to jump into conclusion. is mason mount and y/n y/l/n together?

neither mason mount or y/n y/l/n are yet to speak up about the situation and have ignored any sort of questions when asked over social media. do you think there together, or is this all a misunderstanding?

your jaw slowly hits the ground as you read one of the articles. you scroll through multiple of your dms too, some congratulating you and others saying horrible things and calling you names. your so engrossed in all these messages and articles that you didnt realise you were meant to be getting on the plane. mason clears his throat causing you to look at him. he gives you a small, sympathetic smile before nodding his head towards the plane, implying that we should be getting on. mason left the window seat for you so you take a seat and get prepared for take off. you rest your head on the window as you feel a cold hand on your thigh. you look at mason and he smiles, earning a smile from you back.

‘dont worry about it’ mason says as he runs his thumb back and forth on your thigh giving you goosebumps even though you usually dont like when people touch you

‘im not worrying about it’ you quickly reply as mason laughs at your confidence

‘by the way your chewing your lip and your eyebrows are slightly raised, im sure you are’ mason says, causing you to look away in embarrassment. although it did make you feel a wee bit giddy that he was paying attention to your features.

‘by the way your leg is bouncing non-stop and you keep biting your nails, your worrying about it too’ you reply. now it was masons turn to look away in embarrassment, causing you to laugh. 

your not one to usually fall asleep on flights, but somehow you did. you were woken up to mason gently shaking you. still half asleep, you get off the plane, however, you did nearly fall down the stairs as you got off, earning a laugh from mason. you and mason got your suitcases before getting in the uber. mason explained to you that we would be there for a week and the wedding is in 2 days, so the first day we will hang around with his family and then after the wedding we are free to do whatever we want. after you and mason chatted some more, you finally arrive at the hotel.

you were stunned. the hotel was luxurious and absolutely gorgeous. but you couldn't help but feel a wee bit of sympathy at how much money mason has spent on this hotel for not just him but you. yous walk over to the receptionist and get your key card before going up to try find your room. after the 2 hour and 30 minute flight you were pretty exhausted, even though you did sleep most the way through it, so you just wanted to change into more comfortable clothes and jump into bed. 

you walk into your hotel room and you can't help but feel mesmerised by it all. the large windows which show a beautiful view of italy that are slightly covered by the translucent curtains and the beaming lights which hang above the bed. however, your day dream soon came to a stop as your eyes landed on the one bed.

‘there's one bed’ mason mumbles but loud enough for you to hear

‘no shit’ you reply as you quickly jump on the bed landing on your stomach

‘ill take the couch’ mason says

‘no honestly its fine, ill take the couch’ you insist

‘y/n, I know your tired just take the bed’ mason says as he places both yours and his suitcases in the corner of the room next to the windows you were day dreaming about a couple minutes ago

‘no’ you dryly reply

‘guess we’ll both take the bed then’ mason says as he chuckles. as much as you wanted to insist on someone taking the little white sofa which is placed at the end of the bed, you were too tired too. so you just quickly got up and walked into the bathroom to have a shower as mason stayed sitting on the bed on his phone. however, you were in such a rush to shower and get into bed that you forgot to grab some pjs from your suitcase. you mentally curse at yourself as you unlock the bathroom door, earning an eyebrow raise from mason which you choose to ignore. you rapidly go up to your suitcase and pull out the first pair of pjs you can find, as you are aware the towel your wearing is extremely short and as your crouching it has lifted up a wee bit. but, to your luck you got the most revealing pjs you brought. it kept you covered up, but you knew from past experiences that it tends to roll up in your sleep a lot, especially the top. however, you had no choice so you just put it on and left the bathroom. you got into bed as mason got up to shower.

‘dont snore please’ mason says with a laugh as he walks into the bathroom

‘I dont snore’ you reply as you hear mason laugh in the bathroom. as soon as your head hit the pillow, you fell asleep straight away.

you wake up the next day to your back pressed up against masons chest. you two were so close you could feel his chest rise up and down as he lightly snored. as you had guessed, your silk pj top had slid up revealing your lower stomach, however, mason had swiveled his arm around your bare waist over night, keeping your stomach warm. you stay lying down a couple minutes as you adjust to the light and try to wake up. you soon feel mason squirm under you as he wakes up too.

‘morning’ mason says in a raspy voice sending chill down your spine

‘morning’ you reply as you smile at him. as soon as mason looks down he immediately notices his arm around your waist. he doesn't hesitate to remove it rapidly, causing you to scrunch your eyebrows. was he uncomfortable? you got out of bed before you could have anymore of those thoughts and went to the bathroom to get ready. mason said we were just spending the day with his family and going on a walk to explore the city of rome where we would then go out for dinner. you hadn't really thought about it much, but it only hit you now when you arrived at the located area masons family had planned to meet that you were actually going to meet masons family and act like masons fake girlifriend. you didnt know if you already regretted agreeing to this but there was no going back now.

mason gets out the car and quickly walks over to your side to open the door for you. his family watch in awe as you hold each others hands and walk up to them. you couldn't help but feel something in the pit of your stomach even if it was all fake. you were nervous. however, all those nerves quickly went away as masons family nicely greet you.

‘oh my god, hello y/n! its so nice to meet you, im debbie!’ debbie, masons mum, sweetly greets you as she engulfs you in her arms. you greet her back before greeting everyone else

‘im jaz, so nice to finally meet you!’ jaz, masons sister, kindly says as she also hugs you. after all the ‘hellos’ you started your walk around rome. you weren't nervous, however, as soon as you realised you and mason hadn't planned a believable story about your love life together, you cursed at yourself under your breathe and mentally slapped yourself.

‘so how did you love birds meet’ jaz asks as she looks at you. you quickly look at mason with wide eyes before looking back at jaz

‘well I work as head of media at chelsea, so we just started getting closer as we saw eachother everyday’ you say as you try sounding believable. although, it wasnt exactly a lie as you did meet mason because you were head of media

‘so your work colleagues, thats lovely!’ debbie says as she smiles and claps her hands together earning a laugh from everyone

‘how long have you been together?’ masons dad, who introduced himself as tony asks as he gives you a dead serious face. you couldn't lie, you were wee bit intimidated by him so you gently pinch masons thumb, implying that its his turn to answer a question

‘erm, um about 4-5 months’ mason stutters, making him sound so inconvincible earning an eyebrow raise from his dad

‘you kept this beautiful lady from us for 4-5 months mason, your a joke’ jaz says as she attempts to get summer to slap mason, making everyone laugh. your walk soon comes to an end as you all walk over to a restaurant to have dinner. you all order and ate, chatting the whole night. although, you weren't really listening to what everyone was saying as you were only paying attention to the way mason was stroking his foot up and down your bare legs. everyone orders dessert, however you dont as your not so hungry. you have summer in your arms as you and mason make funny faces at her making her laugh

‘so when are you two gonna have kids, I want more grand babies!’ debbie says out of the blue, making everyone laugh and mason hide his face in embarrassment

‘mum stop’ mason quickly replies before lifting his head out of his hands, revealing a very red mason

‘oh come on mason, stop being embarrassed you've definitely thought about it before’ debbie replies, earning another erupt of laughter through out the table

‘its too early’ mason says before turning around so he's facing summer again, but he can't help but look down at you as summer grabs the top of your v-cut top, giving mason a perfect look, however, he quickly looks away

‘its never too early’ masons brother, lewis, joins in as he winks at both you and mason making you both go red. the conversation goes on for abit longer before it goes away. when masons dessert arrives, you can't help but ask for abit as it looked so good, earning a laugh from mason. soon, its time to leave.

‘you know you guys can kiss infront of us right’ lewis says

‘I know mate’ mason quickly replies before we all say our goodbyes and leave

when yous arrive at the hotel, you shower and get into bed before wishing mason a goodnight. just like a repeat of yesterday, since you were so exhausted as soon as your head hit the pillow you fell asleep.

you wake up the next day to a cold bed. you turn around to see an empty bed. you sit up and rub your eyes as you gradually adjust to the sun shining through the window. you hear the bathroom lock unlock as a dressed up mason walks out

‘you have 15 minutes to get ready for the wedding, hurry up’ he says as you look at him, your eyes wide open. you were so tired you had completely forgotten about the wedding

‘fuck, why didnt you wake me up you prick’ you say as you quickly run into the bathroom to get ready. mason just laughs as you start doing your hair and makeup as you had no time to shower anymore. you walk towards your suitcase to quickly find your outfit

‘30 seconds’ mason says as you run back into the bathroom

‘shut up!’ you scream back before getting changed and leaving to go to the venue

the venue was absolutely gorgeous. you take your seats and wait a couple minutes for the wedding to start. as they start your speeches, you can't help but let a few tears slip out at how cute it all was

‘are you crying?’ mason asks as he quietly laughs

‘no’ you reply as mason pulls you into his chest where you quickly wipe your tears. soon, the wedding comes to a finish and its time for the after wedding party. you danced and laughed with mason and you even got to meet his grandparents

‘your so beautiful sweetheart’ she says as she pulls you for a hug

‘aw thank you!’ you reply as you hug her back as mason just watches in awe

‘you two are so cute together’ she says as mason wraps his arm around your back and kisses your forehead, making you blush. soon enough, the party comes to an end, however, yours and masons night wasnt. you both ended up going to this club you found on the way home as you were still both sober. you have been in there for 5 minutes and you had already lost mason, however, this group of girls asked you if you wanted to do shots with them, so you accepted. they all headed to the dance floor but you ended up staying at the bar for one more drink. as you were waiting for the bartender to make your drink, an old man in his mid 50s sat in the seat next to you. you could basically taste the alcohol coming from him since he smelt so vile. 

‘you look lonely princess, want some company’ the man says as he leans in causing you to lean back

‘no’ you reply as you chuckle

‘come on, you know you want me’ he replies

‘no, fuck off’ you say

‘lets take this to a more private place’ the man says as he places his hand on your waist and lifts you off the chair, giving your ass a slap as he did so. you quickly push him back as he falls into a group of people, making everyone look over at what's happening

‘dont fucking touch me you scum’ you say as you quickly walk through the mosh pit of people as you try to find mason, however, he is no where to be seen. after looking for about 10 minutes, you finally find him in the corner of the club. although, you did not expect to find him with a leggy blondes tongue down his throat. is he being serious? did he not feel the tension between you both every time you're alone together? does he seriously not feel anything for you? your day dream is quickly stopped as you feel someone gently tap your shoulder causing you to turn around. the man looked around your age and you couldnt lie, he was attractive

‘are you okay, I saw what happened back there and I really dont think you should be in here’ the man says into your ear as it was difficult to hear over the loud music. you hadn't even realised you were crying. you just nod as you couldnt get your words out, however, the man stops as he looks behind you

‘she's fine with me lad’ mason says with a rough tone

‘calm down bro, I was just asking her if she wanted to leave for some fresh air’ the man replies

‘and I said she's fine with me lad’ mason says as the man walks off. mason grabs your arm as he pulls you out the club. as much as you wanted to scream at him and insist, you really just wanted to leave that environment

‘what the fuck is wrong with you y/n, what if he was a pedo?’ mason asks as he paces up and down. you just sit on a bench as you try to collect your breath

‘what's wrong with me mason? ive just seen another girls tongue down your throat whilst im meant to be your ‘girlfriend’? what if your family saw that?’ you reply as you raise your voice

‘its not like were actually together y/n, drop it’ mason replies as he laughs. you couldnt believe how unbelievable he was being

‘and how would you feel if you saw your ‘girlfriend’ do that?’ you ask as you stand up from the bench. angry was an understatement for how you were feeling

‘wouldn't really care’ mason dryly replies as he laughs once again, making you more aggravated 

‘yet you had a full on strop when a man offered me help’ you reply as now you laugh

‘face it y/n, he wasnt offering help he was probably tryna do stuff to you’ mason says as he gradually starts raising his voice again

‘oh my god mason, if you weren't fucking snogging a leggy blonde you would have noticed he was offering me help because a man was trying to touch me up’ you shout at mason. thank god it was late at night so no one was out on the streets to see this scene you and mason were causing

‘your so easy to manipulate y/n’ mason says as he shakes his head at you. you look at with as your eyes widen

‘what the fuck is wrong with you, your disgusting’ you say as you quickly collect your bag from the bench and start walking off before looking back

‘go back to the hotel mason and dont wait up’ you say as you roll your eyes at him, mason doing the same back. 

there was no way you were gonna go back to the hotel and stay in the same bed with mason right now, so you walked down to the beach that was close by and sat on the sand. as much as you didnt want to cry over the situation, you couldnt believe how horrible mason was being. you would have never expected that from him. you were sat on the beach as someone approaches you from behind. you look back to see the man that had offered you help at the club. he gives you a sympathetic smile before asking for approval to sit next to you. you nod as he takes a seat

‘are you alright? I saw how distraught you looked, im sorry I didnt come over to you earlier’ the man apologises as you try to smile at him, even though you have mascara stains all down your face and your makeup is all smudged

‘yeah, thank you’ you gently whisper back as you try to stop your voice from cracking

‘do you want a hug’ the man asks as you nod. as much as you hated physical touch, the hug actually made you feel a wee bit better. you both chat for another 2 hours. he introduced himself as jayden and even gave you his number. you soon said goodbye and got into the uber you ordered before heading back to the hotel. however, back at the hotel, mason paced across the room with his hands in his hair. as much as he didn't want to admit he was wrong, he knew what he said to you was extremely wrong and now he was even more worried since it had been nearly 4 hours and you still weren't back. he just got into bed and tried to get some sleep even though he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep without the comfort of you in the bed, even though he's only slept in the same bed as you twice.

the sound of you unlocking the door pierced through masons ears, but he didnt know how to react, so he just decided to pretend he was asleep, although he was far off it.

you walked in and placed your bag down on the couch at the end of your bed before quickly washing your face and putting on a random hoodie which you found on the floor. you were thankful that mason had already fell asleep so you didnt have to deal with the awkwardness, however, you were aware you were going to have to some time soon. you got into bed but stayed more far away from mason then usual. you were about to fall off the bed but you were dedicated. as much as you were exhausted and tired, you couldnt get to sleep. your eyes filled up with tears for the 100th time today as masons words repeated in your head. you really thought he felt something, but you were so far off as he didn't even care about someone touching you up. you were aware you weren't getting any sleep soon so there was no point of staying in bed.

on the other side of the bed, mason also laid awake. he could hear your quiet, muffled sobs and he couldnt bare to think you were crying because of him. when he felt the bed shift as you got up, his actions came before his thoughts as he grabs your waist, pulling you back down to lay against his chest. as much as he knew what he was doing was wrong, as he was horrible to you, he really didnt want you to be upset over him.

you lay gently against mason. his touch pierced through your skin as his arm still drooped over your waist. you really wanted to push him away, you really did, however the warmth and safety coming from him made your eyes droop, sending you into a deep sleep straight away and same for mason. how can someone who hates physical touch feel so comfortable in the arms of someone she's only known for 4 months.

you wake up the next day to an empty, cold bed. you weren't surprised, however, you did feel abit hurt that he had left and not stayed to talk it out, even though you were aware that you were stubborn and would most definitely not forgive him this early. you quickly jump in the shower and get ready before leaving the hotel so you could do something, anything. you first started of with a walk, however, when you bumped into a big shopping centre, you couldnt resist. whilst shopping, your phone vibrates in your pocket. you sigh at the thought of it being mason. you pull out your phone to a message from an unknown number. 

‘hey, its jayden from last night, I was wondering if you were free tonight? xx’ the message read. you couldnt help but smile whilst replying saying you were free. jayden replied saying be ready by 5 and bring a swimsuit. it was already 3 so you decided to go home and get ready.

you walk back to the hotel with your hands full of bags which were filled with clothes. you were already feeling so much better since shopping was like your retail therapy. after multiple attempts of trying to open your hotel room with all the bags in your hands you finally did it. you walk in and place your bags down before turning around to the site of mason lying down on the bed with his head on the headboard and his phone in his hands. he didnt even look at you. you scoff as you pull the swimsuit and some shorts and crop tops you bought today out of the bag and walk into the bathroom to get ready. you tie your hair up in a bun before checking the time. it was 4:45, perfect. you walk out and grab everything you need.

‘where are you going?’ you hear mason ask as you look up at him, his eyes finally on you as you make eye contact, making you swallow hard

‘out’ you say dryly, looking away from him again

‘on your own?’ mason asks as you frown. as much as you wanted to be petty and give him a taste of his own medicine, you decided to ignore him just incase another full blown argument happens again, which could delay your plans. you walk out and slam the door before getting a message from jayden saying he's here. you walk down and greet him before getting in his car. he drives you down to the same beach you guys sat together on yesterday. you guys swam, sun bathed, threw water at eachother and more. you enjoyed it, but you still couldnt help but let your mind roam onto mason again. 

soon enough it was 9pm, so you both decided to go to the beach bar, where you drank so much more then you should of. jayden couldnt drink as he was driving so he just watched and laughed at your drunken state as you slurred your words.

‘I think its time to go home’ jayden says whilst laughing at the way your face squirmed at the 60th shot of tequila you had had tonight. jayden somehow walks you to the car but he notices the goosebumps appearing on your arms, so he gives you his hoodie and drives you back to the hotel

‘ill walk you to your room before you embarrass yourself’ jayden says as he gives you a piggy back, sending you into fits of laughter. he asks you for your keycard as he opens the door and lets you walk in. he didn't want to invade your privacy so he stayed outside until he had your approval to come in. he wasnt intending on sleeping with you, he just wanted to help you get into bed. however, since you were so drunk you had completely forgotten about mason.

mason was in the bathroom when he heard your giggles. he sighs a sigh of relief at the thought of you being safe, however, his heart drops when he hears the voice of a man. he can't hear what he's saying properly since he was so far away, although as the voice moves closer to the bathroom, he instantly recognises the voice. he mentally curses at himself as he lets his actions come before his thoughts. he unlocks the bathroom to see you and the man who mason had accused of trying to do something bad to you yesterday. 

jayden gently places you on the bed before asking you where your makeup remover was. you point to the bathroom. he turns around to be faced with mason. jaydens eyebrows shoot up and his eyes widen as he turns around to look at you

‘did you seriously just go on a date with me whilst you were sleeping with him the whole time?’ jayden asks as you slowly stop laughing. a wave of coldness hits you and it feels like you had sobered up in a matter of seconds

‘what no, were not sleeping together, well we are, but not like that I swear!’ you quickly say, as you stand up from the bed, nearly tripping over air before jayden puts his hands on your waist to steady you, making masons eyebrows twitch

‘what?’ jayden asks as he removes his hands from your waist as he remembers what just happened

‘its fake, me and him, yeah like fake like fake girlfriend and boyfriend’ you say slurring your words as jayden raises his eyebrows

‘y/n you talking absolute non-sense, I thought we actually had something going on you know, guess it was a one sided thing ay’ jayden says as he turns around to walk towards the door. you look at mason for help. for mason to do anything to get jayden to believe you, however, he just stood there staring at you. you quickly try running towards jayden without tripping

‘nooo im not talking non-sense I swear I dont like him please’ you beg as jayden opens the door before looking back at you

‘as much as I want to believe you, I know you have feelings for him y/n. I could tell the whole night’ jayden says before leaving. you stand there as your knees weaken and you drop on the floor. even though you thought you had sobered up, you were still very drunk, so when you started crying you couldn't stop. mason walks over to you as he tries to get you to stand so he could get you ready for bed

‘get away from me’ you say as you try hitting him, however, mason dodges it

‘come on y/n, I know you hate me right now but please just let me get you ready for bed’ mason says gently as he picks you up, placing you on the bed

‘you ruined everything, you begged me to come here just for me to be upset the whole holiday, the only time I was actually happy you had to ruin it’ you say, a fresh set of tears rolling down your cheek for the thousandth time this week

‘I wanna go home’ you gently say through more tears. mason feels like tearing up himself. he can't believe he left this happen. he gets the makeup remover jayden was trying to find a couple minutes ago before removing the little amount makeup you put whilst you were at the beach bar. mason was surprised you didnt throw a fit whilst he removed your makeup. you just sat there, helplessly

‘do you feel like you need to throw up?’ mason asks, his voice soft and full of regret for everything he's put you through. you nod as mason puts his hand on the small of your back as he follows you into the bathroom, where you puke your guts out. mason stayed there with you the whole time, either rubbing your back or saying sweet things in your ear. he even tried to tie your hair up, even though there were still so many loose bits. after you felt like you were done, mason gets you to brush your teeth and wash your face.

‘what are you gonna sleep in?’ mason asks as he stares at you, noticing how you were wearing a hoodie he had never seen before which most likely belonged to the man that had just basically dumped you. he watches as you just take off your denim shorts, leaving you in just your underwear. masons eyes widen but he just looks away before getting you in bed

‘I can't believe you mason, how could you’ you gently whisper as mason tucks you into your basically shared bed

‘im sorry y/n, I really am’ mason apologises as he watches another set of tears roll down your face as he wipes them away

‘I thought we had something going on’ you say as you stare into his eyes as mason bites his lip

‘I really liked you, I thought you liked me too’ you say as you try to keep your eyes open. mason didnt know if it was you or your drunken state talking but you know what they say, drunk words sober thoughts

‘I do really like you y/n, thats why I got angry when you caught me kissing that girl, because I kissed her to get over the thought of you but you were still always there’ mason says however, you had already fallen asleep.

[cogbreath]

totally fair if you aren't the right person to ask but you are my one muslim mutual and i was wondering if headscarves were like a closed practice thing or if there are specific styles of head coverings that are closed practice. i wanna get into headscarves and incorporate them into my girlmoding outfit roster but i don't know if i'm ready to actually fully convert to islam (yet. i've been thinking about it tho). my second question is if you know good places online to order headscarves bc i don't wanna give amazon my money for that

its not a closed practice, you can wear them regardless of religion. im not sure if any specific styles are considered such or not though. if there are im not aware of them.

i get a lot of mine from etsy.

i like this seller a lot , i really like the style of that light gray melange khimar, i got it custom in black. price range is probbaly middle of the road though, and a lot of the options here are mostly khimar and niqabs which r honestly my style preference

ive also bought some from ebay before as well.

im a big fan of the instant hijab, i prefer these cuz i can just slip em on and its done and theres no need for any pins or securing.

i personally have not shopped at this store but i hear it mentioned a lot from other hijabis, and also they have a selection of hijabs starting at 5 dollars (idk how shipping might effect that though!)

https://m.modanisa.com/en/

same for this site, havent personally bought from them but i hear them mentioned often, and they have a LOT of options.

hopefully this helps you out a lil! if you have any other questions abt hijab or islam or anything u can dm me or send more asks i'll do my best 2 help <3

[onapril3rd]

A message i'll never send

it's been a while. How's life? It's quite a mess for me lol 😆

Idk how to start, but these things always pop up everytime Im being unbusy. Im gonna reveal this and I know this may cost us being strangers again.

Well, it was started when we met on Tinder years ago. Sebagai pengguna tinder yg masi newbie, ure the 1st one yang waktu itu yang paling ramah, not over sugarcoat, ga sok qewren dan paling lucu (lol) yg match sama aku 😆

We shared jokes and thoughts…sampai pada titik kamu pernah bilang (circa 2021, aku lupa ini di chat tinder ato IG) kalo gabaik utk pelihara trust issue, apalagi menutup pintu orang yg mau masuk ke kehidupan kita. Aku gatau waktu itu kita abis ngomongin apa, as long as i know, it might be a quite hard convo. Your words hit me hard, idk mgkin karna saat itu relate aja sama keadaanku.

Since then i loved to share my thoughts, annoys you and asks you pertanyaan2 ga penting. Nyaman aja rasanya bisa sharing tanpa ada judging. And I started to re-build my confidence just by remember to what you had said. I never forget how you react to IGs i shared. Sometimes it was a joke, sometimes it's a caring one. Idk what this feeling was at first or when it was begun. I always trying to defend it, though deep down inside I wish we share common faith but I knew it's impossible. So I decided to keep it untold and let it be just friends. Between us.

It ain't hard to hide my feelings back then, as we never meet in person, never do chat on daily basis or even vcalls. But do you know, the more you tease me with your words, the more I would fall deeper? And it's gonna be harder for me to hide it. Aku bahkan ga sanggup utk nanya why you teased me with those words. Im too naive to ask you as im not ready for the answer. I know its kinda freaky to have a feeling for someone you've never met in your life. It's also my 1st time to experience this feeling.

Oh iya, im personally hurting tapi juga sekaligus relieved pas kamu jawab pertanyaanku soal ekspektasimu thdp responku pas kamu kirim DM itu. It's hurting when I know you expect me nothing. But it also a relieved that I could continue annoy you as a friend (again). But it just until the moment before you read this, that may be we can't befriended again.

Aku tau setelah ini mungkin kita ga akan leluasa bertegur sapa lagi. Pls dont get me wrong, im just trying to be assertive and be honest to myself. I dont expect for your reply or even your repay for this confession. Im too shy to say these things cuz this is too long and a bit poetic. Thank you for being such a nice friend, a caring one and a funny one. Meskipun kadang jokesmu kaya bapack-bapack yet I luv it. Im bad at saying goodbye but I wish you the very best in life 🤗

[favorite-lie]

i cant even. i can't make myself reply to anything. it is genuinely stressful to just know there is somethimg to reply to

it is absolutely okay to dm me about your commission though..... i must give you all at least a thing at least a message back, barely a minimum, below a minimum even

its just. im sorry

people often say i should just make a break, but i cant allow myself one, since i literally dont do almoat anything at all for the most time as if. every day was a break. i just dont do much. i dont think a break will help.. they are waiting for too long, for some it's been more than half a year. that is a ridiculous amount of time. i cant just let myself rest, yet i cant make myself do anything.. i-

i cant do anythinf i cant . i promised to make a simple minecraft skin almost a week ago. they dont take more than an hour i still dodnt do it. i promise to take care of the dishes and then i cant. i promise so much i promise to deliver somwthing and then i forget about it.. i promise so much to my partner yet i just cant do anything. i promised them a million times, i will teach you english. tomorrow. i will begin. tomorrow begins, nothing happens. a week later ill be ready. im not. please dont cry i promise i will teach you soon. in 2 weeks i promise. i did not. hey i made a list of worsd to teach you with. i did not i fuCKING FORGOT I FUCK8BF FOROGOT FAINA I CHNWNR GN O I KEEP FORGETTING but 8t crawls my mind and drives me insane i fucking cant

and it happens with eceeythibg i just i cant. everything feels so stressful andtiring. i just want to hide and do my little things. my mind doesnt want any of this so it makes me forget .but it mames it worse. i just want to go keep playing or make a model or work on my project ideas. but i cant i must keep going i must do it but i i i cant i

i msorry .. . i would say idtry my best with all of the commissions but now i know its gonna be a lie. i dont know if i can do my best. i dont know if i xan do anythibg

im so stressed and burnt out and worried and feeling and things about commissions im so sorry if i sady i will do something and then not do it im so sorry i just cant anymore this was so much i was not ready but i didnt have a choice im sorry

i say ill try my best but im not sure if i can even do my best i cant do anything at this point even remember to reply im im so sorry

[workofmark]

“it just...doesn’t make sense to me. i don’t understand how you could give yourself up to a world that isn’t even rooting for your success. and all of this is for what, mark lee? another sleepless night and holiday spent away from home? why can’t you just be selfish for once? why can’t you just say no?”

“i have said no. i said no to help, to hand outs, to people, to my own family. i made it this far in my career because i was selfish. i worked extra hours because i wanted to be the best. i could’ve went home but i didn’t because i wanted this life. being an idol is one of the most selfish things i’ve ever done, don’t you understand? everything i do is because i want to do it. i want my body to be bruised and aching because i know that means that i worked just that much harder. i want my family to miss me because i’m out on tour rather than having me sit at home with them and wondering about the what ifs. i want people to respect me so i try that much harder, exhaust myself just that much more in hopes that my moves become a little bit more fluent, that my lyrics have a little bit more meaning, that my life becomes more worth the wild. i didn’t do this for my family. i didn’t chose this road for the fans. i make the decisions on a day to day basis for me. because i wanted this. because i am selfish.”

—snippets from a work i’ll write one day

[lovelookspretty]

lover of mine

drew starkey x actress!reader au

— in which drew and y/n, secretly exes, must fake date in order to keep the peace at a mutual friend’s wedding, but the forced proximity makes them question whether they ever truly moved on.

warnings: a really long chapter part thing i fear . kisses .. maybe .. IM NOT SPOILING THIS

prev next

authors note: erm guys .. if im rushing this then do NOT pay attention !! I WANT THEM TO BE OKAY AGAIN JUST LIKE U GUYS I FEAR. I CANT HELP MYSELF. but do NOT think this is the end because this is NOT!! we still have to get through the rest of the second week + the wedding. and if u think about it, DAMN a lot happened in week 1 omg goodnight

anyway, if u still arent part of the tag list, feel free to let me know thru replies, anons, or dms !! notifications are always on <3333

you keep your distance from him the next two days. you know you have to face him, and sometimes you do, but you’re stiffer than before. he knows better than anyone to maintain that gap until you’re okay again.

it just feels like your breakup with him all over again, but this time, for a different reason other than having too much time apart. this time, you’re all he spends time with but there just happens to be something getting in the way of that. another girl. it isn’t fair.

drew’s been trying to show in little ways that he’s sorry, but it doesn’t cut it for you. not yet. and you don’t want to lead him by a string and take advantage of him caring about you. but him bringing you breakfast, then trying to avoid you throughout the day until you’re back in libby’s bed again—it’s just frustrating.

you don’t even want to be there anymore. you don’t want to have to deal with this. but it’s for leila and theo, their day is coming up soon. you just want them to have a good time and then you can all separate ways and live your own lives again. how it’s always been and how it should be.

the guys are getting ready to visit town while the girls stay back. this isn’t for you though, and you’re grateful. gia proposed a self-care day after a package was shipped to the home, a large box of cookies, and safe to say you all agreed to the plan.

“i’ve been trying to get back into reading but i feel like i have no time sometimes,” leila’s telling you and the girls as you set up shop at the kitchen island.

there’s an array of face masks, moisturizers, rollers, oils, creams, other things they’ve wanted to try. gia even brings her diffuser and places it nearby as the tv in the living room plays.

“i recommend ‘doomsday’!” libby perks up from across the table. “i read it last summer and let me tell you, i bawled crying for a month straight.”

“y/n, you read,” leila says as she files her nails, crossing a leg over another. “what are your recommendations?”

“hey,” theo greets leila as he and the boys join you four at the table, each with their respective girlfriend besides libby and oscar, and technically you and drew. he hovers behind you but just merely nods his head to say hello. “we’re gonna head out.”

“oh, okay,” leila says with a small frown, but kisses him goodbye. “drive safe, alright?” you’re winking at roman who points at you to say to behave, but he kisses gia’s cheek before he’s following theo out.

you answer leila from earlier with a shrug, “i’ve been wanting to find ‘the last love letter’ but i haven’t really been reading lately. been too busy.”

gia mouth gapes open as she slams her hand on the table, nearly knocking something over. “shut up, i’ve been wanting to read that too!” she shrieks as libby tells her to be more careful.

you can only giggle at her while she gets off her seat and comes up behind you to pull your hair and tie it back.

“that book is literally nowhere, i swear the author only made like five copies of it.”

“have you guys read ‘self sabotage’?” leila asks as she and libby, already prepared, begin to place their face masks on.

you’re on the couch with the girls as libby records you on her phone. the box of cookies are opened and after careful review, you’ve all decided what to try first and what comes after that, and so on.

“now?” you ask libby if she’s ready, and she nods. you, leila, and gia take a cautious bite out of the pieces you’ve broken off of the first cookie. it only takes you a few chews in to realize how heavenly it is. gia even pretends to faint beside you.

“holy shit,” leila says as she covers her mouth, taking a look at the cookie with wide eyes. “are you serious?”

libby lunges at you with her phone to take it from her, “well now i wanna try it!”

you’re in a fit of laughter as you try to turn the camera around before she can sink her teeth in, but she’s too fast. your eyes widen at the girl, “libby, slow down!”

and eventually, you’re full of cookies and half of them are still yet to be tried. you agree with the girls to continue this matter tomorrow if the boys don’t eat it all themselves, and you know they will. you’re just glad you’ve already tried all the ones you really wanted to before then.

when the guys get home, it’s exactly what you anticipated. they bee line directly to the cookies on the coffee table, but not without greeting you all first.

theo groans as he takes a bite, roman right beside him to stuff a whole chunk in his mouth. “this is better than sex,” he murmurs while roman snaps his fingers several times. leila can’t help but nod in agreement.

“i feel cookie-drunk,” you say with your hand on your stomach, and gia curls up into your side as she holds onto hers. “what’d you guys get?”

roman is quick to reach into his bag and pull out a couple of keychains, as if he just got reminded about something. he tosses one at gia’s head, and you look over to see what it is.

“the world’s okayest girlfriend,” she reads aloud, and she chucks it back at him, no longer accepting the gift that roman laughs about. she gets up to see what else is in his bag, leaving drew to plop down next to you and libby, who’s on the other side of you this whole time.

she’s cleaning the ice cream off her spoon when she speaks up for you and her, “what’d you get?”

“few things,” he says as he lets you look inside for yourself.

you pull out a long box and open it. it’s a chain bracelet, sterling silver. it’s nice, and you nod with raised brows. there’s other things inside that you only glance at, but when you look up at him you notice the new pair of sunglasses that’s resting on his head.

you pull it off of him silently and place it on yourself, unspokenly thanking him for the temporary gift you’ll give back later but you like them so now they’re yours for a few hours.

drew purses his lips and closes his bag, assuming you’re done, so he gets up and starts heading upstairs. you look over at libby. without hesitation, she asks, “you okay?”

you hesitate, and you know she’s only asking this because this is one of drew’s brief interactions with you since a few days ago. but you shrug it off, “yeah, i’m okay,” you say.

libby doesn’t miss a beat, she’s not convinced at all. she knows you well enough to understand what ‘im okay’ really means is ‘i’ll be okay’. that it’s not okay, but it will be eventually.

she’s seen this look on you before, during the hardest parts of your relationship with drew. she can feel the unspoken words between them, the ones you don’t even need to say out loud.

“right,” libby says with a soft sigh. she wraps her arms around you, pulling you into a comforting hug. “you’ll be alright,” she whispers. you know she won’t pry further, but knowing that whatever drew did, it was enough to hurt you again.

after a few moments, she pulls back and, with a small smile, asks, “wanna help me with dinner soon? leila thought it’d be nice to eat out in the backyard tonight, by the pool.”

you hum softly, nodding your head, “yeah, that sounds good.”

libby grins, “awesome. ‘cause it’s pizza night and i cannot do it alone.”

the next few hours blur together. you’ve successfully prepared the pizzas with libby and slid them into the oven. now you’re cutting into them and displaying them outside on the table.

it used to be bare, but someone since morning has gone out there to help decorate the backyard to make it just a little flashier. there’s a cloth on the table, which is scattered with candles, flowers, dishes, platters of cookies, fruits, a charcuterie board, and there’s a helpful variety of drinks.

fairy lights blink across the backyard, even over the pool, and it illuminates the whole place. you place the different pizzas in between each candle piece, which libby lights as you do. when you call everyone outside, you join together at the table.

and once theo leads you once again with the ‘i’m grateful for my future wife’ shit, you get to dig in. you’re pretty sure it was longer this time around and even roman started to just eat until he was kicked under the table by drew.

“fucking finally,” libby murmurs under her breath after theo concludes his speech, to which causes him to pick up an olive off the plate and toss it at her. “yeah, you’re so lucky i like olives,” she whispers to herself as she rearranges her napkin, “fucking loser.”

“libby,” you scold, though you can’t hide your laugh. she’s grinning when she looks up, silently laughing with you.

when you turn to drew on the other side of you, he’s taking large bites from his slice. he tilts his head back with a groan, then takes a longer look at the pizza as he chews.

“s’it good?” you ask, and he nods rapidly, and soon his body moves with it. you bring yourself to smile, grateful that people you care about like what you’ve cooked.

you reach over to take your own slice from each pizza and just stack it on your plate, planning on going through them one by one from the one on too being the one you least want to eat, and the last at the bottom being the one you’re most excited for—a ‘save the best for last’ type of thing. it’s silly but you do it anyway.

drew’s finishing up his bite when he leans into you gently. “i have to talk to you later, by the way,” he says, and it sort of startles you because at this point you’re just talking to libby.

you look at him with furrowed brows, but again, you’re not mad. you’re not upset with him. at least not in this moment, you can’t be.

and it looks like he’s grateful because he can see it too. “if that’s alright with you,” he says, then takes another bite. you just nod at him in silence, and watch as he turns back to oscar who’s on his other side before talking to him.

you look straight ahead where roman’s sitting, and he sends you a look. he heard drew talking to you, he knows it must be about something important, but it’s not what’s on your mind right now.

you shrug it off. “—tell you later,” you mouth to him, then turn to libby when you realize she’s talking to you again.

after dinner, gia and leila clean dishes while literally all of the guys clean up outside as a thank you to you and libby, who lay across the living room with bellies filled with food.

there’s a movie playing on tv that you can barely pay attention to, but you’ve been laying there for about an hour so if you really want to, you could. you just play into the laziness that you’re allowed.

you hold your phone above you as libby rolls around the carpet, or at least that’s what you last saw her doing before you looked away. you’re scrolling through texts with your manager as if a new message will come in.

“did elyse get back to you?” libby asks, a face-full of carpet and it sounds like she’s just a few feet away. “about the thing.”

“no,” you mumble, then turn your phone off and set it face-down on the carpet, just like libby. the side of your head is laying on your arm as you look at her. “i could go for another cookie.”

“you ate three!” libby’s muffled voice raises.

“and i’ll make it four,” you tell her, raising your volume back. you consider getting up but don’t feel like it. you can actually lay here forever—maybe.

“y/n,” you hear his voice. it’s drew.

and you get up immediately. he was so softspoken, so cautious with you. he’s entering the house with the other boys who must’ve finished outside, meaning it’s time to have his talk. you almost ask if you guys can just have it there if it’s not that important, but if that’s possible then he wouldn’t be trying to get you alone.

you look over to libby, who—at the sound of drew’s voice—peeked her eyes out to see what he wanted. she looks to you, and she understands why you have to go. she convinces herself to get up and find the remote so she can turn the volume up.

you know it’s for you and drew, and a part of you wants to nudge her or be offended, and you do. is this going to be normal behavior in the house? turning up the volume just for you and drew when you guys need to have these ‘talks’ that are just screaming practice in disguise?

you’re almost embarrassed but you know that you’d rather have this than let them hear you two upstairs.

you follow him to your room, or technically his room as of three nights ago, and he lets you inside first. there’s a chilling feeling when you realize what’s about to happen and you feel like he’s literally about to murder you.

the room is clean, for the most part. you didn’t doubt for a second that he wouldn’t take care of this room regardless if you’re in it or not. his bed isn’t made and his backpack’s on the edge of it, opened and rifled through.

you look to him when you’ve entered, and he nods toward the bed, as if to say he would rather you sit there while you listen to what he has to say, so slowly, you make your way over and settle down on the edge.

drew pulls out a chair from the desk across the bed and turns it around, pushing it closer to you. you’re surprised that he’s doing a whole setup just to talk to you. maybe he really is going to kill you.

“i haven’t been honest at all . . . since we started talking again,” he begins as he sits down in front of you. you stay there and close your mouth. you want to hear what he has to say, even if it ends terribly. you need to hear what he’s been thinking. “so i’d like to tell you everything about this past year if you’re okay with that.”

you shrug and gesture to let him have the floor. “please,” you insist with a nod.

he sighs as he fiddles with his fingers in his lap. “there’s . . . mila," he starts, and even though you knew this conversation was coming, it still stings when you hear her name.

“i guess you could call it a situationship or whatever,” he says before he catches himself, realizing how that sounds. “i mean, to me, it felt like that. but i think—” he pauses, chewing on his words. “no, she definitely saw it as more. she always viewed it as a relationship.” he glances at you, watching for your reaction, but you just sit there, waiting.

he rubs a hand over his face, frustrated with himself. “we just weren’t on the same page. i was . . . i was using it to distract myself, if i’m being honest. and i know that’s not fair. i knew it even then. but it felt easier than than facing what i was actually feeling at the time.”

he continues, “i told myself it was nothing, but i knew, deep down, it wasn’t fair to her. she didn’t deserve to be strung along like that.”

you feel your chest tighten, but not from jealousy. it’s you knowing that someone else had been hurt in this too, someone who had clearly thought there was more between them. “does she know? about this?” you ask him.

he flinches slightly, as if the concern you’re showing for mila makes this even harder to explain for him. he hesitates, “i officially ended things with her three nights ago. the night you confronted me about her. i told her it was over, that i couldn’t keep pretending things were fine when they weren’t. she didn’t take it well. and honestly, i don’t blame her.”

you’re quiet for a moment—so he’s decided to keep you and him a secret from mila? to spare both his and her feelings? you aren’t sure if you should bring light to it or just push it aside. you did say before that it was ultimately his decision.

“i’m glad you told her,” you say carefully, but there's a pause before you add, "but i can’t imagine how confusing this must be for her.” you shift in your seat, rubbing your palms on your knees. “i mean, from her perspective, this whole thing must feel like it came out of nowhere.”

he swallows hard, nodding. “yeah, it wasn’t fair to her. not at all.”

there’s a beat. he looks at you, his expression more vulnerable than you’ve seen in a long time. “i told her about you,” he says. he’s quiet, as if he’s afraid of the confession. “i told her that i’m . . . that i’m still not over you. that i don’t think i ever really was.”

what?

you blink, startled by his words, though in a way, you’re not entirely surprised. you’ve felt the tension between you two from the moment you started talking again, but hearing him admit it, finally saying it out loud . . .

his voice is rough, like he’s forcing himself to continue. “but that’s why things with mila were never real. not for me, at least. i kept telling myself i could move on, that i could just forget, but every day i’d realize i wasn’t. i couldn’t let go of you.”

“but you broke up with me, drew,” you remind him. “that doesn’t necessarily sound like you’re in love with me.”

“i didn’t break up with you because i didn’t love you,” he says, his brows furrowed. “i do, more than i’ve ever loved anyone else.” his eyes meet yours briefly before dropping to his hands, which he’s fiddling with in his lap. “like, it was the opposite. i felt like i wasn’t enough for you. like i was failing you.”

you feel your breath hitch in your throat, but you don’t interrupt. you sit up on the bed.

he leans forward, his elbows resting on his knees as he speaks. “our jobs, the schedules, the distance . . . it was tearing us apart, you know? and every day, i’d think about how i wasn’t giving you what you deserved. we were supposed to click, supposed to last, but i felt like i was just holding you back.” his voice is quiet, and he rubs his forehead slowly. “and i couldn’t stand the thought of you waiting for me when i could never give you the time you needed. it was eating me alive.”

you stay quiet, but tears prick at the corners of your eyes. his words hit hard, and you feel like everything that was left unsaid was finally coming to light now—there were arguments that could’ve been avoided, the misunderstandings that built up. he was overthinking, spiraling, and instead of talking to you, he made the decision for both of you.

“and i just kept thinking, like . . . ‘she deserves someone who can be there for her, really be there. someone who can come home to her every night’. i wasn’t that guy. i’d go days without seeing you, weeks even, and it broke me.” he swallows hard again, shaking his head. “i convinced myself that you’d be happier with someone else. someone who wasn’t always on some stupid set, always busy.”

your heart aches as you watch him, his guilt written all over his face. you lean forward and whisper, “but you don’t get to decide that for me, drew. we make decisions together. or at least, that’s how it’s supposed to work.”

“i know,” he mutters, his tone regretful. “i know that now. but back then, i thought i was doing the right thing. i thought i was . . . protecting you, i guess. from me.”

you shake your head, wiping at the tears that are now falling freely. “protecting me from you? drew, i never, ever wanted anyone else. i wanted you. i didn’t care about the schedules, or the distance. i would’ve waited, and we could’ve figured it out. together.”

his eyes finally meet yours again, and for the first time, you can see the depth of his regret. “when we broke up, i tried. god, i tried to move on. i tried to find something, you know? but i was always looking for you.” he takes a shaky breath. “every girl i met, i’d compare them to you. i’d look for pieces of you in them, trying to find something familiar, something that felt right. but it never worked.”

you knew he had tried to move on, but hearing that he was always searching for you in others, that no one ever compared. it leaves you speechless for a moment. if that’s what happened, then why invest so much time into mila?

you finally gather the courage to ask, “mila. did she . . . was she like me?” your voice is soft, almost hesitant, but you need to know.

“no,” he admits, shaking his head. “not really. mila was cool, and she’s . . . she’s great in her own way. but no. she wasn’t like you.” he pauses, as if trying to find the right words. "but i remember i wanted her to be."

he didn’t try to replace you with mila, but it was clear that he had been searching for something, anything, to fill the void you left behind. and it never worked.

“no one’s ever going to compare to you, y/n,” he continues, “i realize that now. it took me a while, but i’ll always search for you in everyone, and it’s never going to be the same. it’ll never feel the way it felt with you."

for the first time in a long time, you feel like you’re finally getting the truth. the real, unfiltered truth about why things ended the way they did. he wasn’t running because he didn’t care. he was running because he thought he wasn’t enough for you. and now, he’s sitting here, telling you everything he couldn’t say before.

“i’m sorry,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper now, on the verge of crying. “i’m sorry for walking away. for not talking to you about it when i should’ve. i was scared. scared that i wasn’t enough for you, and scared that i never would be.”

you can feel the tears still lingering in your eyes, but there’s also a strange sense of closure. you’ve needed to hear this for so long, to understand why things fell apart the way they did. and now, you finally do.

“i messed up,” he says, “i messed up everything, and i know it. but i never stopped loving you and i’m . . . i’m still in love with you.”

you stay silent, blinking away the burn in your eyes, trying to absorb what he’s saying. part of you feels relief, but another part of you is cautious. you’ve been hurt before like this. by another and by him.

he watches you closely, and it feels like the longer the silence is, the more anxious he gets. “i know this doesn’t fix anything, and i’m not asking you to forgive me or take me back. i just needed to tell you the truth. i needed you to know that mila . . . ? mila was never you. no one is.”

the room feels too small suddenly, too full of emotions that you don’t know what to do with. you take a deep breath, trying to collect your thoughts, but all you can manage to say is, “why now, drew? why are you telling me this now?”

his gaze softens, “because i didn’t want to lose you again. not without you knowing the truth.”

you can only look down at your lap. your vision blurs as you try to focus on your fingers, interlocked and tense in your lap, the pressure in your chest is tightening by the second.

you don’t trust yourself to speak just yet, so you hold everything in, to find the right words, but nothing comes out.

when you finally lift your head to look at him, the tears are already pooling in your eyes. you blink rapidly, trying to keep them from spilling over, but it’s useless. without saying anything, he stands up and pulls you into him, wrapping his arms tightly around your frame.

you let out a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding as your face presses into his chest, and it’s like the dam inside you finally breaks. the tears fall freely now, your body shaking as you cling to him, feeling the warmth of his arms around you—something you’ve missed so desperately.

and it’s not just about the last few days. it’s about the past year of missing him, of pretending you were okay when you weren’t. and you can tell drew needed this too. you can feel it in the way his grip tightens, like he’s afraid to let go, like he’s trying to hold together everything that’s broken between you both.

you stay like that for a long time, the sound of your quiet sobs muffled by his chest, his hand slowly rubbing up and down your back as if to soothe the ache inside you. it’s a comfort you haven’t felt in so long, and it is exactly what you’ve needed.

toward the end of it, your face still pressed against his chest, you mumble something, your words half muffled by the fabric of his shirt. he loosens his hold just a little, enough for you to pull back slightly, just enough to breathe. “i . . .” you take a shaky breath, your hands still gripping his arms, and when you finally meet his eyes again, you whisper, “i never stopped loving you either.”

the words hang between you, raw and honest, and as soon as you say them, you see the way his expression softens, like it’s the only thing he’s been waiting to hear.

his lips crash into yours, urgent and insistent. his fingers tighten against the back of your neck, pulling you closer, as if he can’t get enough. his lips coax yours open, deepening the kiss, and he swallows the whimper that escapes you.

his other arm wraps around your waist, pulling you into his lap as he sits back on the bed. he kisses you like he's been starved of you, his tongue swirling against yours, his hands exploring every inch of your face, your neck, your hair. this is what he’s been waiting to do.

his hands trail down to your hips, pulling you flush against him, and he breaks the kiss, only to trail his lips along your jaw, down your neck, his breath hot against your skin. “stay with me tonight?”

you can’t get enough of him, and although you know that everything can’t be completely fixed over just one conversation, sleeping and waking up in the same bed as him isn’t hurting anyone.

you nod, a soft smile on your face that causes him to grin. but he pulls away slowly hesitating for a moment, his smile growing a little wider as he reaches past you into his backpack, his fingers rummaging around as if he’s searching for something precious.

you watch him, curiosity bubbling inside you. what could he possibly have?

“hold on,” he murmurs against your lips, his voice low and filled with warmth, and you smile as you press another kiss to his.

finally, he pulls out a book, holding it out toward you with a look of pure joy on his face. you take a look at it but almost don’t even catch it the first time until a second later. your heart skips a beat as you recognize it—the last love letter.

“shut up,” you say, taking it into your own hands to see if it’s real. and of course it is.

he nods, a soft smile spreading across his lips. “i heard you talking about it with the girls before we left earlier,” he explains, but he knows you can tell already that much. there’s a goofy look on his face as he wipes underneath one of his eyes. “i knew how much you wanted it and i saw a copy in town, so . . .”

“no, shut up. i can’t take this,” you exclaim, feeling tears welling in your eyes. “star.” the words spill out, a mix of disbelief and overwhelming gratitude. it’s not just the gift; it’s the thought behind it that strikes a chord deep within you. you trace the cover with your fingertips as if it’s a treasured artifact.

he watches you intently. “i wanted to,” he assures you. “i heard it, i thought it would mean something to you.”

your gaze shifts from the book to him. “thank you, it does,” you whisper, your voice shaking as you blink out a few more tears.

you set the book aside momentarily, throwing your arms around him once again. the embrace feels like a lifeline. you hold him tightly, your heart racing as you bury your face against his shoulder, inhaling his familiar scent.

he wraps his arms around you, holding you just as tightly, as if he’s afraid to let go. the world outside fades away, and in this moment, it’s just the two of you, wrapped in each other’s arms, a bubble of intimacy where everything feels right again.

after a long pause, as you pull back slightly to meet his gaze, you can see the softness in his eyes. “you really didn’t have to do this,” you say again, looking down at the brand new book. “but it means the world to me that you did.”

he grins, “i know it’s just a book, but i wanted to show you that i’m here—like, really here this time.” and you are so glad he is.

“i missed this,” you say softly, your voice barely above a whisper.

he closes his eyes for a moment, and you continue to explore the pages of the book, though your thoughts keep drifting back to him. aw you run your fingers through his hair, it dawns on you how much you've missed this—this connection, this easy banter, the comfort of being together.

“i missed us,” you finally admit, looking into his eyes, and in that moment, everything feels right again. it all floods back to you.

he shifts slightly, leaning in closer, and his arms slide to wrap around your waist as he lays his head on your shoulder to take a look at your book with you, his voice in relief as he mumbles, “me too.”

and you’re happy, it all just feels like your dream again.

@rubixgsworld @itgirlbrina @thepopcultureaddict @icaqttt @samsmelodrama @kissfinalgirl @itsamegazaddysworld @willowpains @toterry @wearemadeofstardust0 @cl4uus @maybankslover @itneverendshere @httpsdrewstarkey @ilyrafe @sunny1616 @pillowprincess4him @yootvi @matthewswifeeee @uwuemlwlrld @l4venderia @chenslucy @darkreymbow @congratsloserr @skyslowalking @behindviolettwrites @allthoughtsmindfull @lovelylupin04 @ecstqzy @dasguccier

[lanshappycorner]

Just in case any of yall can relate and need this on ur blog

[povcherry]

The Love Test | DNF

Dream and George take a test to see if they are in love with their best friend

The intense red text was prominent on his screen. Frustratingly, the one time Dream agrees to playing bedwars with George and Hypixel is down.

Dream lent back in his chair, hands behind his head staring up at the ceiling. His room was dark, the only light shone from his monitors. Patches wrapped around his legs. A deep sigh left George, as he lay his head on his desk in exasperation, an empty subway wrapper by his face, the time on his monitor read 2:17 am, yet he wasn't tired. After being on calls almost consecutively with Dream for essentially a year, he had managed to sync his sleep schedule up with him, already in Florida time prepared for when he goes to live with Dream and Sapnap.

George was disheartened. He was looking forward to playing with Dream. They were both normally either too tired or busy editing or working to go on minecraft for fun, and not just for a YouTube video. But now that they couldn't play bedwars, they were bored and unsure of what to do. They only called each other so that they could play minecraft, but that wasn't an option anymore.

"What do you want to do now then?" Dream asks, his voice far away from the mic, so much so that George nearly missed what he said. He hesitated, staring at Dreams discord profile picture light up.

"We could..." He stalled, drawing out his words. He wasn't the best at making decisions, he was much to indecisive. "Do you want to stream GeoGuessr?" He suggested, silently hoping Dream would say no. He didn't really want to do anything, only talk to Dream for hours on end.

"Not really. My brain is too slow for that level of concentration." That earned a giggle from George, putting a small smile on Dreams face. He loved that sound. "How about we go in my merch vc? Me and ni- Sapnap had fun last time just listening to music?"

George was hesitant. The last time he went in Dreams merch voice call was during the sleep over with Sapnap and Dream. That ended up in a disaster of butterflies and George having to turn his phone off for a couple of hours just to distract himself from the 'dreamnotfound' mayhem they had caused yet again on twitter. He felt giddy just thinking about it, Dream whispering into the mic, loudly cursing when George beat him at 8ball. It made him dizzy thinking about it... thinking about him.

George didn't hate it though- the attention from Dream and the fans. Despite all the jokes and innuendos that they both do to mess with their fans, George knew there was some truth to it all. A deeper meaning to being called an idiot. The endearing term that Dream loved to use oh so much. George felt fluttery, wanting to be called an idiot at this moment.

"George?" He had been silent for a while, reminiscing.

"What would we do on there?"

"Just talk. Or listen to music. Whatever you want to do, George".

Without thinking, George clicked onto the icon for Dreams server. "Do you need to add me to the call?" He asked, unsure about how the podcasts worked.

"Yeah, I need to quickly tell my mods to open it first."

Within minutes, they where in the call, hundreds of people pouring in immediately, spamming the chat with things like 'GEORGE?!' and blue and green hearts. George stifled a giggle, nerves taking over him. Despite doing streams for a living with tens of thousands of people watching him, there was something more intimate with calling Dream in a private server.

"Hello" Dream broke the silence, welcoming all the fans. He chuckled, looking at the chat, "Yes, George is here today. Hypixel was down and we had nothing to do"

"Hi" George was unsure what to say, scratching his neck in awkwardness. It wasn't this weird when he was streaming. At least then they had a plan and chat was relatively easy to read. He was doubtful that this call would end well, what with his ignorance to some innuendos and jokes involving DreamNotfound.

"We thought we would just pop on here. We're kind of bored." Dream stated, unable to see what people where spamming in the #podcast chat. "I can't see what you guys are saying, i'll probably just read my twitch chat."

Half an hour passed and George was getting hungry and bored, nothing eventful had really happened so far except for Dream explaining his setup and chat freaking out over his galaxy mouse pad.

"I want food but all that's in my fridge is butter... oh and the BTS sauces and... uhm expired milk" George complained, looking through his fridge while still on the call.

Dream chucked, "Why do you have expired milk in your fridge?"

"Not the point, I just want food"

"Well get some food then" Dream counteracted. George sighed and rolled his eyes, sitting back down in his chair. His stomach rumbled loudly, calling out to his hunger.

"I'm going to order McDonald's." And with that George muted his mic, found the McDonald's number and ordered his food, in the background, he could hear Dream.

"Should i do a quiz?... yeah? Link some in the podcast chat." There was a long silence. George, long ordered his food, stayed muted, listening to Dream talk to his chat. He found it so endearing the way Dream spoke to them, as though they where a family. His voice soft and gentle as he scrolled through the chat looking for a quiz.

"Ooh, this looks interesting... oh, 'Am I In Love With My Best Friend?'. Sounds... interesting" George stopped. Everything seemed to slow down. Eyes wide as he looked at the screen infront of him, Dreams discord icon lighting up as he chuckled nervously. He wasn't actually going to do it was he? The room was getting hot for George, he wasn't sure whether he wanted to delve into the idea of being in love with his best friend, let alone his best friend being in love with him.

He quickly unmuted, ready to call Dream out on what he was doing, but Dream beat him to it.

"George, i'm going to do the 'Am I In Love With My Best Friend?' quiz" He laughed, opening up the link and reading out the first question. "do you catch yourself looking at your best friend?"

George stalled. They had face timed multiple times in the past, Dream only letting George see his eyes upwards, but George always found it hard for him to look away. He got lost staring at his best friends eyes. George quickly messaged Dream asking for the link for the quiz, if Dream was going to do it, so would George.

"Dream, check dm's" He rushed.

"Huh, what, why?" Dream asked, busy trying to still his own heart beat. He had always known at the back of his mind that he had romantic feelings for George, whether that is because he was just touched starved and was desperate, or because he genuinely wanted more than just a friendship with George, suppressing his feelings as to not ruin anything between them.

"Just read it." George urged, getting apprehensive, unsure whether he should just delete the comment and over analyse everything Dream says.

But before he knew it, the link to the quiz had been sent to George, a small smiley face underneath it from Dream. George was about to reply with a '?' to the smile, but Dream spoke up again.

"I just put 'once in a while', i mean, it's not like im never looking at you but i don't do it like.. all the time." George clicked all the time. He couldn't get enough of Dreams warm amiable eyes. His eyes were a kind of green that speaks to the soul of nature, of fresh wands of grass and new buds, and his eyes were that bright colour, bold and beautiful.

"Right," he snickered, " next question, 'are they the first person you call when something happens?' uhm... yeah, i guess. But not always, i mean i would call my mom first." He laughed, ignoring the fact that George was silent. George always called Dream if something was wrong. He wasn't in contact with his parents, Sapnap wasn't the most mature when it came to serious things, yes he was a great friend and he would be there for George if he needed, but Dream came first. George put Dream before everyone, at time even before himself.

"George?" Dream disrupted his thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"You're being so quiet, everyone is asking if you're asleep" George looked at chat, Sure enough, between all the green and blue hearts, there where people spamming Georges name and sleep.

"Oh uhm no, it is 3 am though. Kind of tired." He said, anxiously looking at the next question, mouse already hovering over 'it's nice if i can'. George didn't wake up thinking about Dream, not always anyway. Just if they had fallen asleep on call together, or if they were recording a video that day.

"You should sleep." His voice had softened. He too was looking at the same question. Thinking about George staying up just for him made him feel giddy, but he also didn't want George to be sleep deprived.

George held back a smile. "I'm good, we're in sync bb" he snickered, knowing that would get a rise out of the chat. He could practically hear Dream roll his eyes in exasperation.

"Oh come on" He laughed, his voice low and raspy as he started to read out the next question. He couldn't get through it without laughing, however. "'Do you get jealous if he or she has a boyfriend or girlfriend?' Oh come on! I mean..." He started, George's scoff cut him off. "What?" Dream laughed.

"Nothing" George giggled

"To be fair.. no, but... i mean, wouldn't anyone?"

"Not really." George counteracted.

"Well, no. But! But! But! It would be one of those things where it's like, awe, now he's gonna be spending time, like, doing that, instead of like, with us. Like with like, me and sap. So, I'll put maybe a little. Right? Maybe a little.?" Dream stuttered, trying to defend his reasoning while George just giggled at his flusteredness.

George had already clicked 'ugh its the worst' already. He remembered when Dream had told him Sapnap was moving in with him. Now, George knew his best friends. He knew there was nothing going on between Dream and Sapnap, but something about them living together tickled George the wrong way. He was pissed off, to say the least. George wasn't normally jealous, but when it came to Dream, he became a different person. He almost didn't want to share Dream with anyone else... George wanted Dream all to himself.

"Dream, no one is arguing with you..." George whispered endearingly, a small smile painted across his lips.

The next few questions were uneventful. Dream still defended his answers despite no body calling him out on them. The chat was a blur of left ear jokes and and blue and greens. George answered 'yes' on the majority of the questions.

" Do you have dreams about them? Im- Okay! That's unfair, like, oh my god. Okay, I'll put sometimes." Dream rushed, desperately wanting to move onto the next question. He didn't want to tell chat, and especially George, about the dreams he has. No body knew about the desperation Dream has when he dreams about George. The want and longing to touch George in many ways than one. The heartache Dream feels when he wakes up because he knows the happiness his feels in his dreams could never be recreated.

"What?" George once again giggled. He was starting to have fun now. Seeing Dream embarrassed made George feel slightly better about his answers, but at this rate he was afraid the quiz would tell him he's so hopelessly in love with his best friend that there was no hope for him. "What do you dream about me?"

"You- you've had- you're- you're an idiot, you've had dreams! You've had one hundred pe- you've told me about dreams you've had!" He stammered, struggling to get his words out correctly without revealing too much. He was starting to get hot, the air conditioning in his room seemed to do nothing, the 'GNF' jumper he was wearing was suffocating him. He was suddenly finding it hard to breath under the weird pressure of these questions he had no obligation answering.

"What type of dreams, hmm?" George teased. He had his head resting in his hands leaning on the desk, taking in everything Dream was saying. George, of course had clicked 'all the time' about dreaming about Dream. Dream was on his mind 24/7.

"Oh don't even start with me, i know you've had dreams about me. You told me you've like.. texted me in your dreams or something. You.. you definitely have, anyway..." The two argued for the next few questions, and it was all smooth sailing for both Dream and George, until it came to the big one. The one that caused George to almost throw up the McDonald's that he had eaten a half hour ago.

Dream went silent. George could almost hear Dreams heart beating through the mic. He knew why, too. He saw the question. George had been dreading this. He chose to stay silent, not wanting to draw attention to himself.

"Do you ever think about what it would be like to kiss your best friend?" Dream was silent for almost thirty seconds. He felt sick. The amount of times he had wondered what Georges lips felt like. Whether or not they were made for him. Perfectly molded to fit Dreams own. He dreamt about them constantly. The soft touch of lips. He was beyond salvageable. "Uhm, n-no. Of course not."

"Why did you take so long to answer?" George was apprehensive. He wondered whether Dream thought about kissing him as much as he did. George so desperately wanted to, he wanted to feel them on his own lips, wanted to know what Dream tasted like, how he smelt. He was forlorn.

"I'm just going to put, well... i'm going to put.. well there's no good answers. I'm just going to put 'yes but it would be like kissing my mom'". He lied, his mouse had been hovering over 'at least a few times a day', unsure whether to click it or not, but he knew the truth. He wanted to kiss George more than he ever wanted to do anything ever.

The rest of the quiz, George kept silent. If he opened his mouth, he would confess his love on the spot. He had finished all the questions, revealing a 32%. He was totally in love with his best friend. Desperately, pathetically and hopelessly in love. He needed help.

"Okay, last question" Georges ears pricked up at this, he was happy it was almost over. He needed to talk to Dream in private, even if it killed him. "Do you see them in your future?... of course. A lot of my future is your future. I don't want a future without you in it..." Dream whispered, muting his physical mic so that no one could hear his breath leave his body. That was the most intimate he had probably ever been with George in front of fans. He hoped he hadn't just messed anything up.

George still stayed silent. Dreams answer made him almost cry with happiness. He couldn't imagine a future without Dream.

Dream un-muted his mic to finish up the quiz, "It says, you are in love with a few things about your best friend, so it's likely that you could fall entirely in love with them if you... if things keep up the way they are right now." George was unsure of what to say. Chat was once again asking if he was asleep. Both boys took no notice. Almost silently, so silently George almost missed it. But he held his breath, staring at the monitor with fear. All colour had drained from his face. He was about to pass out.

"If.. if you're worried they don't feel the same way... you're going to have to find out how to shut your feelings off, you don't want to ruin what you have."... no one talked for a couple seconds... both of them waiting for the other to say something, until George plucked up the courage.

"I don't want to ruin anything, Dream."

George loved Dream, and Dream was sure he loved George.

[rurifangirl]

aight. here somes the ask lore thingie

tw for ppl readin: mention of mental illness, father mention

firstly, how did rui end up meetin the rest of the gang? did they all have sum sort of run in? did they just happen to meet on exident?

also is the father a villain? i remember ya mention him, and was wonderin

and do they have a specific place where they stay? like in a dormstory, a single house, do they live in a single town, or in completly different places?

do any of them suffer from mental/physical illnesses? if they do, how does it affect their life/relationships w others?

Aight, so here we go, be ready cuz shit's long.

(1st part - The Rui n the gang meeting; The Shou meeting) No Tw

Honestly, I also kinda wanted to do this for quite a long time, so I'm gonna firstly talk about how the gang (w/o really mentioning the others name's since they're gonna get introduced soon) met itself and decided to form, and then I'll individually do It in Lyva's and Shou's case, specifically Shou's since i mentioned that his meetin was somethin id have to take care of in another post, so i will rn.

First things first, w the whole gang. Now It wasn't really casually, mainly because Lyva n Rui did meet up, but It was during a special occasion still, that being a really important manifestation in one of the main regions in my oc universe. (They don't have name's yet so pls don't bash me🤡) Them being primarly the Forest, where Rui eventually lives in after all of his past shit, the near-countryside part, where Lyva was living, a pretty much city living on water, where Shou's currently living, and many more, as such the dunes with which I'll introduce Qiran (hopefully tomorrow/today),The sea itself, some High up places and as I said many, many other more. Other than this brief intro, they meet up where Lyva used to live, but mainly because of problems and out of conviniance.

Everyone had something to take back from, so they agreed to help eachother to reach that end, so it's all really planned. Now i won't really go w Lyva, cuz i explained how she met Rui the first time n how they helped her, so I don't need to ramble more on this. Now I'm gonna go w Shou's part though.

This Is more of a note i wanted y'all to know first, cuz i really like how Lyva n Rui met him the first time (cuz the second time was when the gang then all agreed to form n all that jazz.). Basically, Rui n Lyva were out, n visiting new places as such, to prepare themselves further and to try and search for more weapons, cuz they both knew that they'd eventually get in trouble, and even though they still are good, they wouldn't stand much a chance, n since Shou's Place is known for its production they decided to go. N fun fact, there's many funny shit that happends, for example Rui tries to touch a fish, but gets SLAPPED by It. They're still mad >:[. Ajkskdj anyways, some other stuff happends n they just, lose themselves. They had a map ofc but still managed to do so. But Rui was usin It so, I don't really blame em for gettin lost.

Shit happends n they find themselves pratically in front of his shrine/palace. Shou's servitors (cuz he saw everything happend from afar n gave them the okay) brought em in, but rather than makin em idk some tea n just making them recouver, Shou rather put them under some "tests" w/o tellin em, to see if they were any use.

For example he brought them some cups of tea, but before drinking them Rui noticed somethin unusual in the water, so they gave Lyva a sign to not drink It, n as Shou asked as a reason why they just replied that they weren't thirsthy, leavin Shou in a kind of defeated state. Bitch if i love this part honestly, there's so much fun to seein all of their reactions, but I'm gonna go brief rn. So other of this tests pass later n Shou eventually gets upset cuz they're all winnin n seemingly makin fun of him, lettin him in a weaket standpoint, n a fight happends. Even though it's a 2v1 situation he can still manage pretty well, so It ends in a draw. They get to talk after this and get to understand that they don't have to necesseraly be on the opposite side, though Shou Is still unsure whether to belive in that or not.

After they leave him, pratically almost alone w only a bunch of servitors helpin him. He admits defeat n won't show up until the event and yadayada. (Also it's during this weak time of his he'll meet Qiran which i already have plans w so it's all goin to be said bout their relationship in their post.)

(2nd part, the father mention.) Tw:father mention

So it's true that w Shou i did mention his father, but I'm not entirely sure bout his involvment honestly. In theory he kind of is a villain itself, even because of his devilish nature, so it's true, but im not sure whether to make him an independent villain or part of a group of them. But rather than that yes, i do want to make him some sort of villain in the end, because that's also part of Shou's agreement to be part of the group. I will make concept art for him so he'll definetly be involved. Not gonna lie, mabye that bastards also involved w Rui's cult too in a way or another but im givin in too many details holy shit I'll never get outta this fuck

(3rd part- where do they live) No Tw

They live in their own homes honestly, but It would be no surprise if they'd all decide to sleep over someone in specifical, though they have their own place. I made some concepts for Rui's intern home, which here It Is 😤 (forgive me for the bad quality but it's 2 am rn 🤡) I made this a while ago but only did Rui's, so I'll do Lyva's, Shou's n the other one's too. They live in different places, for the exception of, atm, Qiran, since I'm gonna say that they're more of a traveller n don't have a stable home.

(4th part- the mental/physical ilnesses) Tw: Self harm and Mental ilness mention

Well, this Is gonna be a ride. They all suffer from Ptsd, which Rui n Shou suffering from It the most. It still affects them all, though in different occasions, so Imma just do them in specifical. (Also because i gotta add some shit to shou that i didn't wanna add because i thought It was too much honestly)

Rui-

It affects them really much. They use crystals n gems to avoid anything going w their past or anything remotely related It, as whenever they feel awful about havin those flashbacks when they still were a child. They never want to talk about what happened, n during their moments It gets really, really bad. Both emotionally and physically, as their body sometimes cannot handle anything so it completely shuts down. They never really got any help for It as Rui's too scared to share bout their experience, both because of trauma itself that doesn't make them say anything even if they wanted to and because of the cults influence, so either way they've got to handle It by their own.

Lyva-

Other than havin to deal w mornin sickness, which Is the least for her, she has to deal w her neglectful childood and how desperate she's always been for litteraly anythin, whether it's related about love,friendship, food, toys, anything. She tried to seek for help and semi found It, but as of now she can't keep up w It and has better things to take care of. It's still really bad overall, but she's hoping for things to get better. Spoiler It really won't.

Shou-

⭕Tw for sh⭕

It's... really fucking bad. I'm gonna get outta this w saying something i didn't want to add because it's really triggerin, but im gonna do It now. So basically, I've mentioned them acting feminenly for his own mother, but i didn't say what would've happened if he displeased her. She would just stare down at him and whispering some awful shit or names. This would happen especially whenever he'd slip off that mask of his or revealed even a tiny bit of his devilish essence. Note that he's still a child here. So, best thing he could to was to "punish" himself, which basically consists of him scratching his arms too much and, i don't really want to continue this, forgive me but it's kind of triggering even for me. But...you can guess what he's doing, since he even to this day still keeps sharp nails. I'm sorry for putting this, but it's another way to show how his mother fucked him up and now suffering from this.

I'm sorry for rushin the last part but i'm not personally vibing w it.

Tags undercut

@a-chaotic-dumbass @spoopy-fish-writes @dopesaladlady @damnfoxx (I'm really unsure bout taggin ya in this ;-;)

If you want your tag removed, dm me cuz it's 3 am at the moment n i may have messed em up. (I'm not gonna recheck tomorrow so that's why)

[ihatebnha]

hi 🥺 i wanna give you a hug too!! you’re so precious. i am so glad i decided to share my oc with someone as wonderful as you 🥺🥺 (congrats! you’ve been upgraded from being ibiza’s cool aunt to her godmother! LMAO) i’m totally okay with you just replying to me with cute cat pics lol honestly i think ibiza is pretty… catlike. i actually made a second blog just so i can reblog stuff that gives off her vibes & at first it was just all black cats.. 🧍‍♀️maybe i’ll woman up & finally dm you so you can see! anyways lmk if you want me to send the ramble i mentioned in my last ask 🤍🤍 i hope you had a great day & i love u &&& idk if you have any ocs but i would so so super love to hear about yours 🥺 bye bye

-oc anon

a;dfjaskd Sorry this took me so long to get to, i was meaning to respond but i just kept getting swamped with things blehhh... 

OMG THO, we could back and forth about this forever because YOU ARE JUST SO SWEET AND PRECIOUS, TOO🥺🥺🥺 like, ibiza??? my goddaughter??? why do you wanna make me cry so bad... because that’s honestly what i feel like doing when u say such nice things to me LOL🥺✋🏻

but !!! about the sideblog!!!! i’d love love love to see it, so if you want to, you can just send me the url in an anonymous ask if you’re not ready to reveal yourself yet! That way it’s like... i know you are but i also don’t? since it’s not linked to your main account... either way tho, whatever ur most comfortable with is what will make me happy... 

as for the next ramble, i actually have an essay rough draft due tomorrow, so now probably isn’t the best time... but by Wednesday i’ll be officially out of classes (besides a couple exams) if u want to send it (or anything, really) sometime around then!!! im excited EEEEE especially since my only ocs are for an original story i NEVER work on hahaha... 

SO YES!! i hope u had a good last couple days TOO and i love u and will SEE U SOON BYE EEEE☺️☺️☺️❤️❤️❤️