#im not going to quit like i said but im feeling heavily discouraged all around for everything i do ))

[terrminallycapricious]

((feeling like giving up on this hobby even tho i probably wont im very tired))

[mediawhorefics]

Hey! I began reading your fic ‘The Blood of Words’ a while ago now, and I loved the idea of it sososoooo much. Tired tired sea will always be my favourite fic of yours (and possibly favourite fic of all bloody time) but this fic grabbed my attention in a way that nothing else has before! I honestly wanted to curl up and cry when I realised that it was unfinished. I also wanted to slap myself for not even glancing at the part where it said “chapters: 3/?” – there’s me being way too eager haha.

Sorry im waffling here, but for whatever reason you stopped writing on this one, it really sucks because I think it had and still has soo much potential <3 I hope this message doesn’t come across as pushy or angry because the fic is unfinished, I just wanted to express my appreciation for it and tell you how much I loved it (and no doubt would’ve loved then finished product) although I completely understand if you never come back to it💕

hiiii. thanks for your kind words – both about tts & about tbow. that story being unfinished is something that weighs quite heavily on me tbh. it was the first time i tried writing a wip and i realised in the process that it's really not for me. writing in order like this, without necessarily an overall plan/outline, is something i'd never done before. and i thought it would work for me but it really really didn't. i struggled with the process a lot and with the engagement (or lack thereof), which in turn made writing very difficult. it felt like not a lot of people were interested/were reading it which was discouraging and, at the same time, it felt like every single reader who did love the story and followed it was just waiting on me to finish it which just felt like constant pressure to be productive. mix that in with the quite heavy subject matter and it became a hard story to work on.

i hate leaving it unfinished though and i feel really guilty about it. like, really guilty rip. i haven't really shared this because i wanted it to be a surprise, but last spring i started really seriously working on it again. my plan was to finish it all in one go and post it at some point in the summer. i figured out the majority of my outline and wrote about 20k more of it. which, considering how long my outline is atm, is nothing. that fic will probably be my longest if i ever do finish it..... i have almost a full chapter four at this point + some stuff from much later in the story... and it still barely made a dent in the outline.

unfortunately, around that same time, there was some bullshit with people selling copies of tts on etsy and, as usual, i was getting sent more and more links to my fics being posted on wattpad without my consent and unauthorized translations and stuff like that. which really really hurt my feelings and made me feel... so disrespected and removed from the whole process. like my wishes and feelings didn't factor in at all re: what happens to MY work. here i was working super had every day to make a gift for the fandom and that's how i was being treated? people were trying to profit off my work online ?? i don't know... it was really hurtful and heartbreaking and it made me not want to make stuff for people anymore tbh. so my enthusiasm to secretly finish tbow for y'all really fizzled out. which sucks because i know it's such a small minority of people who disrespect fic writers like this, but when you pour your heart and soul into something and you spend countless hours on something, when people don't treat it with the respect it deserves it feels like being spat in the face tbh.

so yeah... i really want to finish it one day because i feel really bad about it, but i've lost a bit of momentum with that recently.

but i will say this: messages from kind people like you help <3 i opened the fic and wrote about 500 words in it after i got your message, so who knows what's gonna happen!

[letteredlettered]

hi! ive been following your writing for a few years now and i drop by periodically to check if you have anything new posted, and im really surprised that you seem to be enjoying the untamed? im curious what you think about the show - its story and characters, the acting, the production, etc. idk if you know, but the untamed is the most successful example of a current trend in chinese entertainment, where popular online novels centered around a gay romance is adapted into a 'safe' drama.

continued:

due to the many explicit and implicit restrictions imposed on creative media in china, many crucial plot points have to be changed (often badly) or removed, including the nature of the relationship between the main characters. the untamed is considered the most loyal adaptation so far, but like all other works in the genre, it received criticism for weak acting and queerbaiting. that's why im really curious about what you think of the show as it is, as itself, free from its context.

if you're interested, you could also check out guardian! it features much better performance and chemistry by the leads imo, but the story was heavily botched bc the original incorporates and reinvents a lot of classic chinese folklore beautifully and stuff like that is considered disrespectful and not-pc. i think it's really sad how so many great pieces of writing with complex world-building and plotlines are simplified into... idek what to call them, but just, less than what they are.

im sorry this turned into a rant. as a mainland chinese person with oh so many frustrations about our current society, it's hard to comprehensively describe my feelings about the untamed's popularity. it's the first mainland chinese show/movie to gain this much organic interest abroad so i should be glad? but, but. anyway, yes, im sorry.

There’s no need to apologize for ranting, but I admit to some confusion as to whether you want your question addressed or the rant. Because I’m me and tend to be thorough, I’ll address everything, in reverse order.

First of all, I’m sorry that this show is sad to you. I’m sorry that the popularity of it is difficult. I’m also deeply sympathetic to your frustrations about your society, as I too am deeply frustrated by my own.

Secondly, yes, I’m aware of the context of The Untamed. I’m aware that the book it’s based on is a BL novel, and that, in order to align with Chinese politics, overt queerness was erased from the adaptation. I’m aware of the censure laws of gay media in China. I’m also aware that some aspects of necromancy and morality were adjusted to make the show more palatable for general audiences, but I’m fuzzier on those details. Lastly, I’m aware that the popularity of the show calls attention to certain things, such as fanfic, and that attention results in more censorship,

The fact of this erasure and this censure provokes a lot of questions: by consuming this product, which contains erasure and censure, do we engage in the erasure and censure? By posting gifs and writing fanfic and talking about this product, do we increase its popularity, thereby encouraging additional erasure and censure? By increasing the popularity of this product, do we diminish the popularity of the original gay morally gray canon, thereby decreasing representation? Do we discourage other authors in China from writing explicitly gay morally gray material? In short, are we allowed to enjoy this media?

I don’t know the answer to these questions. However, I do know that boycott is a very effective tool when it can inflict economic pain on the producer, or when it can exert pressure on an entity to change. That said, I feel like a lot of the calls to boycott certain media these days are a lot like telling people to stop driving their cars to stop climate change: it’s suggesting that individuals can solve the problem, which presupposes individuals are the problem, and therefore fails to address the scope of the problem, or present the possibility of a real solution. Not watching The Untamed isn’t going to change laws about portrayals of homosexuality onscreen in China, partly because the laws in China are a much bigger problem.

The other part of it is that The Untamed is coded queer, so if you run a successful boycott against it, you end up with . . . less queer TV. I know a whole lot less about China than I do about the Hays Code, but if you had told gay people during the Golden Age of Hollywood that they couldn’t enjoy movies that were coded queer because they weren’t explicitly queer, they’d have said you were crazy. In fact, many people will tell you that media that was coded queer was a big reason we got more explicit queer stuff later. And as I’m sure you’re aware, the US is still fighting that battle . . . partly because it wants to sell movies to China.

So then there’s a question about whether me, an American in the US, liking something coded queer from China but not explicitly queer--does that encourage Chinese censorship? Should I only support texts that are explicitly queer? But the answer is the same--it’s not addressing the scope of the problem, and by supporting texts that are coded queer, you could be paving the way in the future for something brighter.

But you weren’t talking about boycott! You were talking about your discomfort with the popularity with this show, which I accept. I understand feeling uncomfortable. I can only hope it makes you a bit more comfortable to know that plenty of fans are deeply aware of the context and do wrestle with the question of what liking this show means in the context of a society that would never allow aspects of the original to be portrayed onscreen.

Thirdly, I’m not against trying Guardian at some point, but by comparing the acting and chemistry of the leads to The Untamed, I feel like you prove our tastes are very different in these regards. I love the acting of the leads in The Untamed; I found their chemistry off the charts. It’s okay you don’t feel the same.

Lastly, you asked my opinion of The Untamed: its story and characters, the acting, the production, sans context of the canon upon which its based and censorship laws in China.

a. I love the overall story, but the plot has deep plot holes. Quite a few segments do not actually make sense to me, because the plot is so haywire. However, I’ve never cared that much about plot, except when it gets in the way of characters and themes, and for the most part, this plot serves its characters and themes, except when the parts they leave out are so confusing that I cannot follow the story. As for the story, it feels like it’s built for me, because ultimately it’s about moral decisions and how to make them; it’s about guilt and paying for mistakes; it’s about learning, changing your mind, and remaking yourself. Really, I’m not sure there are many stories I love more--except they killed my favorite character, and I almost quit. So, that certainly put a damper on things.

b. I love the characters most of all, although the villains are really two-dimensional. However, large parts of the plot are not Hero vs Villain, they’re Hero vs Society, and then some Hero vs Himself in a way that suggests the Hero is no longer a hero. I could talk about the characters forever, but suffice it to say I think they’re really strong. Also, the relationships are really exquisite, particularly when it comes to family dynamics. Unfortunately, they killed my favorite character off. Also unfortunately, there are six women in this show, only two of them are main characters, and every single one of them dies. It disgusts me.

c. I think the two leads are exceptional, in particular Xiao Zhan . . . when he’s not being too broad, which he is quite a bit. However, I do wonder how much of this is direction and production style, because in many instances, he’s quite subtle, and the choices he makes are astounding. Then there are times where it’s like they needed more footage, or wanted to drive home a point, and he turns on the extra, and it’s awful. It could just be him, but I actually feel it’s the case with most of the actors, which does make me think it’s a directing issue. Meng Ziyi never really has that problem though, because she is the most perfect of all. But then take He Peng, who I actually thought could be incredible, but every scene was just SO BROAD that I began to feel sorry for the poor dude having to act that part. But there is nothing to be said for Wang Zhuo Cheng, who really is just terrible, which is sad, because it’s a great part.

d. Production-wise, it’s really hit and miss. So much of the locations are truly beautiful. A lot of the costumes are too, unless the shot is too close. I actually don’t mind the wigs; I love the long hair. The CGI is terrible. And then while a lot of the shots are beautiful, some of them are awkward, and the pacing is really difficult, imo. It really seems like they wanted to drag it out, and there are so, so many scenes where I’m sort of embarrassed that we’re in the same scene or that we’re still looking at someone’s face, or that everyone is just standing there waiting for the shot to finally end.

I will say that film is a language that does differ from culture to culture. It could be that both the broadness of the acting and the awkwardness of the editing are my cultural lens based on American and a lot of western film. When I watched older Hollywood films, the acting is a lot more broad and maybe a little less “true” feeling, but I understand that it’s not the case everyone in the past was a bad actor. It was just a different style, so I’m not sure I’m equipped with the cultural knowledge of Chinese acting, cinematography, and editing to be able to really judge the value of these things.

I do know how I feel, which is that the editing is the biggest hurdle for me while watching the show. However, I feel that the beauty of it makes up for a lot, and the strength of the characters and themes really carries it.

I hope I addressed your points adequately, and I wish you well.

[alphaketoglutaricacid]

@onehithero said: also we know theres at least some actual animals besides gadoll liek the scorpion n cows tht show up for a sec in ep 1 so tankers hav tht going for them re: food sources ..SORRY FOR RAMBLING SO MUCH deca dence essay got sleeper agent activated

onehithero said: i rly like what usaid abt kabu from natsumes pov too but i cannot form a half cohernet thought abt tht one

onehithero said: ALSO ALSO i think its interesting how the ep 8 conversation w minato is i think the only time kabu talks abt being jealous of humans being able to choose their own paths

onehithero said: also how minatos convinced hes like a good lil cog in the machine yet hes done 50 things tht wuld get him labeled as a bug but he just ignores all tht. the both of them can be so disconnected w reality

onehithero said: like minato didnt know abt 1)natsume 2) how the system has made kabu so severely depressed n he culdnt put up w it anymore.n minato continues pushing the just go along w the system shit he doesnt understand tht he was contributing to kabus misery.. n bc of tht kabu doesnt trust minato enough to tell him abt natsume for so long but then he goes n asks smth so big of him as go against the system

onehithero said: thinks abt how kabu n minato r obviously so important to each other but minato understands him less n less over time & kabu kinda already knew its risky to confide in minato like minato did know abt pipe which was a long time ago but he didnt know abt natsume til kabu was already sacrifing himself for her sake. n yet kabu then goes n tries to get him on his side anyway cuz he wants tht so badly..

onehithero said: OMG OMG CHEWS THESE WORDS SLOWLY N THROUGHLY SO DELICIOUS THANK U THANK U u get it u understand i love reading n writing essay lengh responses abt deca dence & again u just hit the nail on the head w this

Please let me know if this @ u 8 times and sorry if it did.  I will reply under this readmore but i love this enthusiasm! I like discussing this stuff so if u want keep it coming. I wanna understand deca dence better and i think i will by sharing ideas w other ppl. 

I think kabu and minatos relationship  is as good as it is because theres clearly a lot of mutual love and respect between them even when they don’t understand each other and thats why minato still runs after him when he hears kabu going suicide mission lets go baby. I think its interesting that minato was like ready to lie down and accept getting mass scrapped until he hears kabu go im about to be hilarious and hes like actually living and staying alive sounds great actually forget what i said about it being over.   you are so right about kabu and trust and natsume. I will always cherish episode 5 where kabu gives this big rousing speech about how natsume inspired him and saved his life and minatos there like ..who? ..what?? I think they may not be used to hiding things from each other. Also I think them drifting apart mirrors natsume and feis drifting apart tho I think while feis the instigator on that side kabus more on his side and minato like natsume is like wondering what in da world is going on. I think someone else wrote about this better than I can.

I do think minato does know kabus severely depressed because theres this line in ep 4 where he puts his hand on kabu and says like you’ve toiled enough at that awful job. and also in episode 11 when he and kabu talk and kabu says he was in a similar place as minato now in that he was waiting every day to be scrapped minato has no reaction until kabu says but that bug saved me. I think he knows kabus very depressed but he does not know how to address it cuz the system never gives either of them the tools or options for it. Though also I feel the system discourages meaningful relationships between the cyborgs so I think what minato and kabu have is likely pretty rare. Kabu donetello and turkey also fought together for a long time but turkey turns on donetello in a second even tho they fought together, he was his number two, and they were in prison together, and were pretty much all they got and donetello kills him in turn. I also think minato probably knew because he’s empathetic. Like I’m not sure about compassion but he’s very good at understanding where other ppl are and how to meet them in the middle so both parties get something they want. That’s how he got all the gamers to collect the old deca dence parts. Not by cashing in on ppl doing the right thing but by framing it as the final mission. He gets his lgbt community center coworkers for fight with him one last time by appealing to their sense of duty. He got the system to put kabu in jail instead of getting scrapped when Mikey got scrapped for a lesser offense. The list goes on. A tangent but I think the fact he acknowledges the living conditions of the humans are gonna get worse if nothing’s done even tho he’s apathetic at best towards them shows even when the system tries to mold the cyborgs into the roles it wants, sometimes the traits they have just keep on going despite themselves. I’m gonna stop myself before I go into jill and this theme but I’m gonna talk about it someday. So I think its more likely than not he knew but he didn’t know how to navigate around it also because it’s heavily implied he’s going thru the same thing and I think kabu might genuinely have no idea Bc kabu lacks empathy but his heart... is huge. When he hears minato express his feelings of not knowing what he wants he instantly tries to reach out and explain minatos not alone in what he feels. This is why they’re good foils. while kabu moves past where he was in the start where he states he does not intend to oppose the system and his compliance while also trying to do the bare minimum drives him to suicide, and finds the willpower and a reason to live and rebel against the system through his connection to other people (first natsume , he hangs out w kurenai sometimes too, and then with the jail robots). Meanwhile minato whos stuck in his literal ivory tower (it’s a Metaphor) never makes any of these connections. It’s the irony of kabu working at a armor repair job giving him some ability to connect w others vs minatos higher position isolating him from everyone else. I think kabu living amongst the ppl he harmed drove him to give up on life quicker, while minato being far apart shielded him from rlly having to see the effects of his actions I think he was headed a lil slower in the same direction. I think we’re led to believe minatos okay where he is but I think towards the end it’s clear minato has spent most of the series also in a bad place. I think he views things very similarly to kabu in that he wants to use what power he does have to protect the ppl he cares about similar to how initially kabu tried to just convince natsume to quit several times and he was like whatever at the rest of the humans who are natsumes comrades dying but he chooses to put it all on the line and try for some systemic change when he sees natsumes determination to fight. Also I think minato holds very little loyalty to the system cuz he doesn’t only like breaks 1000 rules for kabu (the hypocrisy) but he also looks the other way a lot. For example, when he overheard the top rankers talk about limiters he’s like I’ll pretend I don’t hear it also turn on private mode next time and he doesn’t berate them for considering cheating. Also donetello has been using an illegal avatar to climb to S rank again (isn’t it interesting that even after the ranked system is abolished something similar took its place). And his avatar looks the same as it did when minato worked with the guy. There’s probably like not that many ppl in s rank. And he calls himself donetello. Minato knows he’s supposed to be in jail but does he tell anyone? He’s like well.. that looks like someone else’s problem if they notice *goes and vapes* it’s so funny how little minato cares but it’s also not funny Bc some of minatos cruelest actions and things he’s complicit in are born not outta malice but apathy to everything. I think it shows (tangent number 4?) how the systems use of excessive force is counter productive cuz neither minato nor kabu are willing to report anything to disrupt the order Bc neither of them think the level of punishment is warranted. I also think that minato is probably the first person kabu really opens up to about why on a personal level he feels the system needs to be destroyed after Ep 7 is really interesting. It really speaks to how deep their [mutual and not platonic relationship I don’t know how to label ] is. I also think that he admits to minato that he envies human is rlly interesting and would like to hear what u have to think! I think it’s interesting that what really sets minato off is kabu saying he wants to choose for himself and also wants other cyborgs to have that freedom and I think it’s one of the few times we see minato get genuinely angry and have it not stem from worry. Tangent 5 I’m really extrapolating here but I think it’s very likely given how high up minato is that he likely knows of several cyborgs that rebelled against the system for similar reasons as kabu and knows how it ends and I think it probably feeds into his defeatist attitude. I think his role in the system must really kill whatever grasp of whatever minato has cuz he constantly has to act like it’s almost the end of the world and he’s strapped for resources all the time for like decades and decades of having to fake that type of desperation to entertain ur player base and cuz ur also on tv to entertain the general populace to distract them from their soul sucking jobs. I think that’s gotta mess with his perception of himself and also his ability to see that struggle as real and genuine. I think that’s also gotta be hard cuz he seems like out of his whole fuck we r under attack persona he seems like he’s a lil closed off but generally chill and somewhat upbeat to ppl who know him and he just wants to be isabella from animal crossing. I got really off track here. I think what really gets me is their relationship is built on knowing each other so well and so long , and how it’s managed to survive and persist through all this tragedy. They really mutually respect and love each other and that’s why kabu let’s minato walk away from his revolution even tho it compromises everything he works for. It’s why minato ultimently accepts kabus willingness to die for a tanker even tho he really doesn’t get it at all and it means it’s goodbye forever. But it’s still not enough to save either of them. Minato can’t save kabu from trying to passively starving himself to death and I’m not sure if kabu even knows where minato is at mentally. Sometimes no matter how close u are to someone there r things u miss and things u can’t help each other with. Even tho the two resolve to fight and then die together cuz this seems like the best choice Bc the system they were born into offers no alternatives, the deca dence doesn’t even activate without the help of other ppl. I think it shows one relationship cant support all that weight. In the end it is through their bonds with other ppl that gets them to an ending where they both survive when they decided alone their only option is death. Also u are so right about the other animals existing I totally forgot ty I cannot believe I forgot about the scorpion which calls to natsumes hairstyle which is a visual gag on how natsumes a bug and how like a scorpion, although unassuming, and fucking kill u, just like how her trying to get her boss to open up eventually leads to the whole thing toppling down. I also have a lot of thoughts about natsume but I’m still thinking of them and thinking hard Bc sometimes she becomes kabus inspiration Pinterest board and I don’t like that. When she shines she really shines but it starts getting sloppy towards the end so I have to think a lil longer about it. Okay I’m done. Also it’s kinda hard for me to look like I’m agreeing to ur points and nodding in this format but I really appreciate ur thoughts and will try to convey this. Maybe by formatting as a response to each of ur replies next time

[ofmiscreants]

♡ ◟ ° ›   jung jaewon, cismale, he/him, twenty three   ⋯   ❛   thank you for applying to STONED RECORDS, MILO YUN ! before we start this job interview, i would just like to go over a few questions. you said your best attribute was ASSERTIVE, right ? well, word around town is that some people find you to be a bit more EGOCENTRIC … but, nevermind that. i’m actually more curious about whether you were actually THE ONE WHO LEAKED THEIR EX’S NUDES last year ? oh, you were ? that’s unfortunate. on the bright side, i heard that you excel at VIDEOGRAPHY …. so that’s cool ! now, one more question … your last manager said that you’re hiding that you’ve been CAMMING FOR TWO YEARS FOR SOME SIDE CASH AND YOUR BEST FRIEND’S FATHER IS YOUR NUMBER ONE TIPPER, is that true ? — haha , just kidding ! they didn’t say that, i just read that about you online . anyway , you got the job ! ❜ 】 eri, pst, she/her. 

hello i’m eri ! a cat obsessed, possibly nocturnal and very awkward individual. this is my first time joining an rp in .. years, and honestly i am very excited. i do work full time so i will likely be more active on line, but i look forward to writing threads on the dash as well ! i want to preface this with the fact that i am NOT my muse. the things that milo does / say are not me, i do not agree with his moral ( or lack there of ) and trust me when i say i probably hate him more than you. with that said, prepare yourself for the mess that is milo yun. 

so to start off, a brief history of milo's childhood: boy was a spoiled BRAT. his mother gave him everything, he basically never heard the word no, and although he ended up with a little sister by five years he still radiated and owned his only child energy. his mother married a very wealthy man when he was about 8, and milo always hated him for taking even more attention away from him. the only good thing that came from his step-dad was all the money he knew came directly from that man's bank account.

growing up, he was a generally decent person other than his hatred of the word no and not getting his way. personality-wise, he was tolerable. he teased people in joking ways, was a bit outspoken, but nothing too bad. that was until he got in his first relationship. he'd lost his virginity at 13 but didn't get with anyone for real until 15/16 ( i am hoping to get this connection so we can discuss that further if you're interested ). it was a year or so together before milo found out they'd cheated on him and that changed him for the worst. never having been the most romantic guy, he vowed to be the exact opposite from that day on. never again would someone make him cry, never would someone come close enough to his heart to break it, and he would never allow himself to be vulnerable with someone on a level like that again.

it wasn't just a fear of love he gained but an entirely fucked up and cynical attitude as well. he started acting out more, picking fights with people until someone else swung first and he couldn't be pinned for starting it (even though he 100% instigated it ). he wasn't miserable, but he had miserable moments. and soon it became harder for him to care about other's feelings or happiness, and started worrying only about his own happiness and his own needs.

by the time he finished high school he had a well-known reputation of being quite the casanova, and had left all too many hearts broken in his wake. he might not have the urge to love again, but he had a craving for every other part of it ... and deep down he missed it, feeling loved, even if he had no intention of reciprocating it.

BASICALLY, HE FUCKS AROUND AND PLAYS WITH PEOPLE'S HEARTS BECAUSE HE WANTS TO BE WANTED BUT ALSO NEVER WANTS TO NEED ANYONE EVER AGAIN OK.

ok so at 18 he graduated from high school as you do, naturally his parents assumed he'd be going to college but when he informed them that nah he was not, they waite a few months which were spent partying and acting like a crazed teenager in heat before finally warning him that if he didn't get a job he'd be cut off until he did. naturally, he went a week giving them both the silent treatment.. and in that time landed his first job at a coffee shop. it did not last long, and he worked at various other places around town and most of which he didn't last more than a few months at. authority? yeah .. he simply is not a fan. his luck was running out, that was until he decided to try out camming.

it started off slow, but by 21 he was killing it. getting paid to sit in his room and undress for men who are showering him in compliments and tips?? it was a dream come true. after realizing how much money he could make .. it changed a lot. he decided to only work part-time jobs in order to keep the illusion that he was making regular money a thing, and kept all his camming and sugar daddies behind closed doors.

this plan worked out great, two years in and he's working at stoned records and chilling, while nightly leading his double life as a very successful male cammer with a wide variety of fans from male to female of all ages. his favorites, however .. tend to be the older gentleman, the ones he can sucker into paying for skype dates and private videos, the ones who he has to resist rolling his eyes when he calls them daddy but that instant gratification of gifts of money being sent to him makes it all worth it. simple enough, until one of his top tippers turns out to be his best friend's dad. yikes .. and at first he questioned whether or not this was a good idea, but knowing how much money they had, it was hard to resist. he figured .. if it weren't him, it would be some other cammer so why not enjoy the wealth? well because of this he's been holding in a dark secret, having to avoid eye contact during those awkward run-ins, and pretending not to now intimate details about his own friends' family. this is a plot i would VERY much like to fill, and i am willing to change details or information around to make it fit better with your muse.

ok now that i have rambled forever i'm going to attempt to give a few more points that are much shorter

his rumor is about how he leaked his exes nudes after their break up ... this a heavily desired plot and i would love to have it. milo is a fucked up guy and honestly, they probably found out he cheated so in order to "win" this battle he leaked the nudes he had of them and then proceeded to dump them .. i'm sorry he's horrible

sexually he chooses not to label himself, he is attracted to attractive people and goes for what he wants. pansexual would be the closest description, but he himself will never put his sexuality into a box. with that said, he leans toward the dominant-top position, but he is also very open-minded and very filthy so opportunities are endless with him. sex to him is the biggest ego boost .. he loves being wanted, love the validation he gets from someone wanting him and feeling good because of him. he also very much gets off on others being vulnerable with him ( yes we get it he was traumatized bc he's a big brat ) and enjoys the power play dynamic that can come from sexual situations. anything beyond sex and .. he just stops caring. he knows ahead of time that he'll never be the one from them and doesn't plan on making that realization a very easy or pain-free one.

romantically he has only ever felt that attachment once. after he got his heart broken he vowed no more. he technically considers himself aromantic, but if you ask me he's just stubborn and refuses to relinquish power because he was embarrassed and his ego got very bruised. in reality, he's terrified of being vulnerable and giving someone else the chance to decide he isn't good enough. mind games are fun simply because he knows how to gain and keep the upper hand.

a few last things i feel like mentioning, he gets into fights often, drinks very often, does any sort of substance offered to him ( no injecting himself with anything though ), and basically is just ... a fucked up dude with an extremely distorted view of reality. his ego drives him 90% of the time, and he seriously lacks empathy. he's not the best dude in the world .... very far from it.

oh and his dream was to become a famous youtuber / influencer so he got really good at photography and videography but when he didn't become really famous within six months he gave up and instead started camming, just felt like throwing that in so i didn't forget oK now he's milo with the big dick and great lighting.

OK NOW THAT IM DONE RAMBLING .. hopefully some of you actually made it through this, i apologize again for the length of this. anyway i have stats for him and wanted connections so please feel free to check them out and hit me up if you want to do any of them OR if you have other ideas OR just to brainstorm together because i want all of the plots. ok thank you for reading and ily you !

p.s. all plots are open to any gender unless a specific one is stated where it says open. some may have certain pronouns already written but i am by no means closed off to other gender considering it is not something he has a preference for. i also did not have time to write out as many connections as i wanted so please don’t be discouraged with the lack of them .. i work full time and have been very busy lately i swear. i will try to fill them in / edit them as i get more.