#im not exactly timid on the road but ime city driving involves being pushy af. or at least the highways into the city
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vagueiish ยท 5 months ago
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kind of unfortunate that the only trans support group in my area that isn't geared towards minors seems to be inactive :/
#im sure that the website *not* being updated in over a year doesnt inherently mean the group is inactive#and i could probably just...confirm with an email. or something#but. idk#maybe i could crash a youth group like 'how do you do fellow kids'#(thats a joke btw)#i could in theory go to [nearby Big City] to check out groups there but like#i've made a vow to never drive in the city - being a passenger while city driving is stressful#im not exactly timid on the road but ime city driving involves being pushy af. or at least the highways into the city#so thats a No there#and trains exist but then you have to figure scheduling. walking or taking the subway and such isnt an issue for me#but if i take a late meeting for example and i miss the train out of the city... i dont have anyone whose couch i could crash on#online groups exist i guess but then Everything Lives Forever on the net#it's easy enough to stay mum about stuff that could get me doxxed#and while i have put some identifying things on here i dont think ive put enough to connect to the me irl#but idk#but it's kind of strange#before i was kinda just... not quite meh about the whole thing. but i hadnt really examined my feelings about all this beyond#'well when i imagine myself like this it makes me happy'#that wasnt the full story though. im certain it's not. i just.... was trying not to dig too deep into myself#i didnt really want to connect with myself#i feel like transitioning inherently involves (re)connecting with yourself physically - in addition to all the mental and emotional stuff#and like. theres a lot of shit i need to untangle re my relationship to my body#i know in my bones that transitioning is the right step for me. i just....havent really considered what all that means for me#im being told that i have a right to take up space. im just not sure what shape i want to take#idk. anyone know any good not shitty online spaces for this? hmu#gender stuff#to the void with love
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