#im not even that good at it i dont know that many stitches myself
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keo-k · 9 months ago
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sometimes i think i wasnt an injury-prone child and then i realise im gaslighting myself
tw: fair descriptions of injury?? if you dont like blood uhh dont read <3 this is just me reminiscing on being a child who thinks they cannot feel. pain. sorry if its incoherent im very sick and life feels like a fever dream and i did not sleep last night! this is so diary-entry-core TLDR i had a lot of random injuries and a few medical mysteries.
i keep looking at the middle of my chest like "man where the fuck did i get this scar from" and then i remember this one childhood day where i was filled with hubris and slid down a chain in a playground and my skin tore from under my shirt and i started bleeding terribly ill also occasionally look at the permanent callouses on my hands and remember running down a hill at full speed, followed by rolling down a hill at full speed, crashing into rocky concrete, looking down at my hands and being utterly terrified because they're entirely covered in blood???? its all red??????? also spinning on the biggest rock in the rock garden in front of my house after a friend's birthday party blowing bubbles when i lose my footing and land chin-first into the sharpest rock there, getting blood all over my favourite party dress and having to go to the ER for 6 hours and getting, not stitches, but glue. yeowie. i scratched most of the scar off somehow, just tearing the skin off my face because i didnt like the texture. its still kind of there if you look at the right angle. being in gymnastics class, doing beat swings on the high bars, thinking "whey my hands hurt im gonna drop and get some chalk (for some reason. its not like i was slipping i was just yeowch)", dropping down, looking at my hands and LO AND BEHOLD three inches of the skin beneath my ring finger on both hands is sticking up stupid vertical ! i couldnt use my hands too good for the next two weeks, also the skin sticking up WAS NOT DEAD so i couldnt trim it without feeling excruciating pain. like cutting your ear off :( not really a "when i was younger" thing, still valid now, but i have hyper mobility so im stupid flexible. especially in my ankles! like i cant do sports without wearing ankle braces on both legs. even that cannot save me sometimes, i still die. anyway my mum thought i was a piece of shit and was faking my ankle injuries bc the limping would last like. a whole month wowie! then we realised i just have bad joint. also i can hit the splits anywhere without stretching, i can walk on the literal sides of my ankles (not like. the sides of my feet no no no. go even further beyond.), i can fold my fingers backwards into silly lookin curls without any pain and keep them there no issue, and i have gotten many MANY greenstick fractures even after my bones developed a lot because my bones soft and refuse to break like a normal persons. like my basketball coach will bend my leg back to test how far it goes and i wont feel any pain and he'll say like. "oh thats waaaay too far back to be safe." and ill laugh because it can go WAY further back! and i hate it !
BONUS: ME BEING A MEDICAL MYSTERY WOOOOO up to age 8 i would have these ... seizures? all throughout the night. i would shake super aggressively and it wouldnt wake me up. my mum filmed it one night when she finally caught it on video (she would stay up HOURS ON END trying to catch it. wild). the shaking would start like a twitching at my fingers and would travel to my hand, to my arm, to the rest of my body and youd think i got fucking electrocuted. anyway she showed it to doctors and they brought me in immediately to scan my brain for fuck knows what and they didnt. find anything? like my brain activity was completely normal. they didnt let me out of hopital for a week cus theyre like "THIS ISNT NORMAL SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THIS KID" but. womp womp. we never found out. i dont shake anymore but i do shmove a lot. like, a lot a lot. and im always tired and im capable of falling asleep standing up. and have minor chronic fatigue. also i had a bullseye-type thingy on my thigh that really, REALLY looked like a tick bite! i was in immense amounts of pain and couldnt properly walk. there was a dot in the middle, and this surrounding ring of red would expand and shrink overtime. very reasonable to think of it as a tick bite. anyway my parents carried me out to the car in the middle of the night so we could go to sick kids. they measured how much the ring would expand by (i dont remeber number. it was beeg.) and then they sent me to the ER out of the concern that i would get lyme disease. they tested me or something idk i was unconcious and. IT WASNT A TICK BITE! you may be asking "so what was it, mr gorgeous fish?" um. well heres why this is in the 'medical mystery' section. they never found out. it went away a day later and we were just like "ah. okay." so. whoops. when i was a toddler they put me in an mri thing where they uh. strapped me down because toddlers usually freak out and damage the mri thingy? anyway. was in there for two hours. and i did not freak out. at all. i was asleep for one of the hours, but the second one i just laid there very awake and very still and the doctors thought i had brain. damage. i didnt! yay ! i also have many chronic illness now. weeeee i probably missed a lot of my stories here but anyway. heres me being silly
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coldresolve · 1 year ago
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i like stockholm syndrom because of the contrast and conflicting emotions the captive feels. it might not be the most realistic approach, but in fiction, i dont strive for realism. i strive for evoking emotions in myself and the (un)lucky few who read my stuff. i do realize stockholm syndrom might not be actually happening that way.
although i do think it could be a thing, there are so many different people and every one reacts to things differently, think of domestic abuse for example, those women love their "captor" even tho he hurts her. well it s kindof different because she loved him before but i think it does have a paralel.
and lets say in your scenario where davin is the nicer one and renee is the more cruel one (i mean after nervous idk anymore), if i was conrad, i would probably try to get something out of davin since he seems to care. probably would feel more drawn to him and not "love" him, but prefer him, and in weak moments i would probably also feel a sense of connection? its just how i personally imagine it
while i do love me a good internal conflict and fucky relationship dynamics, no writing evokes emotion in me if i can tell the person who wrote it buys into oversimplistic pop psychology. so i guess we differ on that front haha. also chalking the complicated mess of emotions involved in something like domestic abuse up to stockholm syndrome rubs me the wrong way, but its been a long day and its gonna be hard for me to explain that rn
for moneymakers (under a read more if you dont want the dynamic spelled out for you)
there is no trace of stockholm syndrome in moneymakers, and there won't be down the line. there's gonna be some conflicting emotions sure, hopefully an extention of some already fucky dynamics, but yeah if you're waiting for conrad to catch romantic/platonic feelings for davin or renee, you're gonna be waiting a while. im schizoid, i dont even believe in friendship lmfao
the current "connection" between conrad and davin consists entirely of the fact that conrad, although terrified of davin post-nervous, recognizes that he needs davin, both as a source of medical help (stitches/painkillers, etc), and as a barrier that stands between him and the clusterfuck that is renee's general person. for the latter, it's been like that through the whole story. among his two captors, davin has been the one who has stayed somewhat vaguely predictable, which means conrad at least has a chance of learning how to navigate him.
conrad also recognizes that davin is probably using this reliance on help to manipulate him. he doesn't intend to let the tactic work, so he very carefully shuts down any percieved attempt from davin to get under his skin. he won't allow a genuine emotional connection, because he's not stupid, he knows davin would likely use it as leverage. he just wants to not suffer. even if it comes at the cost of emotionally isolating himself
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thedeathwitchescats · 1 year ago
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I dont know why I hate myself so much recently but I do. Nothing is really wrong. Everything is going okay. I just... I hate myself. I really fucking hate myself. I can barely look in the mirror, I cant wear half my clothes without wanting to tear my skin off, I have to wear makeup to cover the red rimming my eyes constantly. I dont want to tell anyone tho. I need everyone to believe im doing a okay so they still have someone to talk to. Im drawing myself away from everything it seems. It feels like a fucking proformance when I talk to people recently. I have to act happy and joyous even tho deep down i want to crack open a bottel of whatever drugs are in the closet and split my wrists apart so deep I probably need stitches. I cant tho. I made to many fucking promises and im a lot of things but a liar us rarely one of them. I just want to breathe again. I had a good stretch where I was actually fucking happy. And then all of a sudden my [now ex] boyfriend had to go off and fucking cheat on me and here I am spiraling. Im not even upset about that anymore its everything the fuck else.
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mothric · 3 years ago
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what enneagram type is the one that gets pissed off by enneagram 4s bc I'm that one
#me shaking every toxic 4 i've ever known by the shoulders: GET. OVER. YOURSELF.#they always think their pain is the most unique most painful pain and their trauma is the most traumatic trauma#and their personality just So unique Nobody can understand me#shut the fuck uppppp shut up shut up trauma isnt a dick measuring contest#and no your green eyes don't actually turn blue when you're sad katie you aren't a deviantart oc!!! gu h#ive known 4s to literally redefine words to suit their own construct of their identity#and then get mad when ppl point out that's not what those words mean#or theyll ask for constructive criticism and you'll give it and they'll either be like 'why are you so mean' or completely ignore it#i am well aware this is not applicable to all 4s everywhere i am specifically talking about toxic ones#i know good healthy 4s and they dont do this shit#it just seems like SO MANY are disproportionately toxic in this way that is carefully designed to piss me off specifically#and dont even get me started on the oversharing you didnt ask for#and then assuming you're close bc they trauma dumped on you against your will#7s do the oversharing shit too and *also* seem to like assuming my feelings for me which i cant fuckin STAND#im not uncomfortable bc i secretly like you susan i'm uncomfy bc you're invading my personal space and stepping on my boundaries#g u h .#do not repost my tags i'll murder you this is a vent for me and my 2k followers#once again want to reiterate healthy self assured 4s are actually Very cool. they dont need to tell you how cool they are#they just exist and are cool and that confidence is 10/10#they have these niche interests you never knew they had until one day theyre casually like 'oh yea i hand stitched this whole outfit myself#or 'i'm working on my third radio show' and you're like you WHAT? you had other ones?? 10/10 love this for them
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oh-for-fic-sake · 3 years ago
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Superman's Dishcloth
A small cute headcannon thats been sitting on my tablet?
Summary: some people use pick up lines to get a womans number, henry uses a crochet lesson.
Warnings: Fluff?
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Your fingers twisted the yarn around the hook automatically looping and pulling untill you made another double crochet stitch that the pattern required.
To be honest you wasnt paying that much attention as you worked your project, which was stupid really because you were making a new pattern, a bobble popcorn style head band.
You couldnt concentrate for two reasons
One. You were on a goddamned plane soaring across the Atlantic ocean. And if things went tits up you cant swim.
And two? You were seated next to none oher then mr henry cavill himself.
Not that you made a thing about it or even dared to look at him.
He he was watching you, eyes frowning as your fingers twisted the yarn into an intricate looking yet fairly simple pattern.
Youhad to stifle a laugh as his fingers twitched tryig to follow the moves and figure out what you were doing.
You growled missing count again. One, two, three three, skip three. A crochet, half double crochet, two double crochet in one stitch then skip three stitches and repeat untill the end.
Normally youd have no problems but your audience was putting you off.
You dropped the project in your lap as you miscounted again and realised you had to undo the last twelve stitches otherwise you'd be a set out on the end.
You closed your eyes grunting before slipping the hook out and began to tug the working yarn slowly before pinching it and slipping the hook into the loop catching it before it all unraveled.
"Why'd you undo it?" You jumped a little as the huge man beside you spoke up after watching you quietly since take off.
"Huh?... oh i misscounted i skipped four instead of three so it'd be out of line on the end and curl round..."
"How'd you know?" He frowned now leaning over even more curious then before.
You chewed your lip trying not to freak out as he peered over your little project.
"Err well i just counted the stiches i had left on the row, see i was up to here and there was five left not six, so i pulled it taught to spot the odd one out" you explained pulling more yarn through so you could point out the stitches to him with the hook.
"It looks complicated, you twist it so many times?" He said as your fingers began moving once more creating the repetitive pattern.
"Yeah... its not too difficult, Im doing a few different stitches is all, once you know a single crochet stitch and a chain stitch your good to go" You muttered with a smile.
"I doubt its that simple" he replied trying to keep up with watching your fingers guiding the hook jthought the piece making the fabric grow.
"It really is, here you see the little v on top?" You said slowing deciding to show him just how simple it was.
"Yeah?" He hummed quietly watching keenly.
"Thats the row before, so you slip your hook under both strands like this and loop your yarn over then pull through under that v so you have one loop on your hook" you said moving slowly and loosened the stitch with a light wiggle so he could see properly.
"Then loop the yarn over again so you have two loops, and pull the second one through the first... and thats a single crochet stitch" You explained showing him slowly.
"So you make lots of tiny loops and pull them through one another and it some how becomes fabric?" He asked fascinated by it, watching as you began to work on the next stitch.
"Yeah pretty much"
"But that one you pulled the wool over before you did anything at all?" You paused impressed he had noticed the slight difference... he had been watchkn that closely?
"So that was a half double, when you do a half double or double you yarn over first, then you just keep yarning over and pulling through until your left with one loop on the hook" you tried explaining as simply as you could.
"... it still sounds hard" he uttered still focusing on your hands that had been creating stitches.
"Honestly its not, i taught myself in about an hour and a half? Here try it? I've got extra yarn in my carry on if you want to give it a go?" You offered and instantly flushed you did not just offer to teach superman how to crochet like a fucking granny!
Before you could take it back and apologise he beamed.
"Really? That would be fun, i've never tried anything like this before" he said eagerly.
"Err yeah sure lemme just get you started, i'll give you a 5 hook... here" you said surprized digging about pulling the small ergonomic crochet hook out and some mustard yellow yarn.
"So you start with a slipknot... and then a few chain stitches" you began guiding him through it slowly teaching him the steps.
"So do you always crochet on long flights?" He asked pokeing his tongue out as he tried concentrating on the stitches he was doing.
"Yeah, im not good with confined spaces... especially confide spaces that are a good few miles in the air over the open ocean" you chuckled nervously chaining a stitch then turning begining your next row.
"Honestly im not either, usually i have kal- my dog but... not this time... this is good though, its helping take my mind off it thank you" he said sincerly.
"Dont mention it"
"Oh... i think ive done it wrong?" He said andnheld it out to you, you prodded it and to be honest you were impressed, it was neat, not a dropped stitch in sight... just a few loose stitches here and there, but he was finding a good tension.
"No, thats not wrong... just your tension thats all it comes with practice" you said handing it back to him.
"Tension?" He said making you pause. Oh yeah, he wouldnt knpw what that is yet.
"Yeah, how tight you hold the yarn and hook determies how tight your stitches are... mines pretty bad, i have to always use a size bigger hook" you expalined simply
"Really?"
"Yep, i do it too tight- even snapped a metal hook in my hand before" you chuckled remebering the way the hook had just... snapped mid project.
"Wow that sounds painfull?" He huffed eeingnyour hand curiously as if expecting you to snap a hook then and there.
"Yeah, i will admit i was frustrated with the project so it probably didnt help" you chuckled sheepishly.
"Frustrated? Was it complicated like that one?" He asked nodding to your growing head band.
"No, i kept loosing count on a pattern of 78 stitches" you said trying to wave it off but in actual fact that project had been murder.
"So what are you making?" He finally asked eyeingnyour work that had grown wider.
"A little headband, and hopefully i will widen it at the ears to keep em warm" you giggled wrapping it around pinchingnthe ends together proudly presenting it to him.
He grinned and looked down at his little square fiddling with it.
"And im making a... mess?" He laughed holding up the uneven square cheeks tinted pink when you giggled again.
"... Dishcloth?" You offered prodding it gently.
"Perfect, im making a dishcloth!" He bellowed nodding proud of his new diy dish cloth.
"I'm henry by the way. But from the way you were shaking in your seat im guessing you knew?" He finally introduced himself holding out a hand.
You smiled shyly and took it shakingnhands trying not to fawn over how huge hot and soft the palm was.
"Yeah... sorry i was nervous and you probably dont want to be bugged. Im y/n" you tried explaining nervously but he chuckled.
"I wouldnt mind being bugged by such a cutie~" he uttered quietly smirking at you tipping his head down a little too make sure you heard him despite his voice being quiet.
"Oh stop it" you flushed quickly looking down at your headband noticing your stitches werent as even as they could have been, but it couldnt be helped you had handsome distraction.
A very distracting handsome distraction.
"Its true. Besides i think it was me bugging you... and i have managed to plunder through your wool" he grinned sheepishly holding up his little dishcloth.
"Its fine, it not expensive, this is left over yarn from other projects" you waved him off. It was true ou had lots of odd ends and half skeins of woll from other projects.
"Well still i appreciate it, i hate flying" he said sincerly.
"Well now you have something to practice. Youll leave the plane with a new skill to stick on your cv" you added with a grin nudging him playfully.
"Indeed... And perhaps i can leave the p,ane with err...maybe your number to? You know to replace the wool and erm swap err instructions?" He said nervously jumbling his words.
You paused and looked at him shocked blinking. Did he just?
You blinked again watching as his face grew red and he chuckled nerously plucking at the woll on his dishcloth.
"Well i suppose every student needs to be able to contact theor teacher~ and these instructions are called patterns" you smiled to him nodding slowly.
"Right right i knew that of course they're patterns" he chuckled grinning ear to ear relived you hadnt turned him down.
"Well we have a good few hours, perhaps a few more lessons for my little student?" You teased picking up the pattern to show him some of the abbreviations. Mostly to try and concentrate on somthing other then the fact superman had just asked for your number... and was taking crochet lessons.
"Of course" he said excited eyes glittering with glee whilst looking at the small page.
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you-did-well-moon · 3 years ago
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Day6 Reaction to s/o learning their instrument while they're away
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Type: Fluff, angst in Dowoon dont know what happened wasnt me
Word Count: 2.865
A/n: I took some creative freedom with why they were away but that is it. Keep in mind, I have no experience with instrument except for when I played the piano in 5th grade for like two weeks. Anyways, I hope you enjoy! - Moon
TW: small cuts, fight, second hand embarrassment
Sungjin
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Sungjin was absolutely and devastatingly exhausted. His own guitar case felt like it was weighing him down tremendously, and he had a huge headache. Jae and Wonpil arguing in the back of the car was not helping in any way. It has been going on since they left the airport. He rubbed at his temples tiredly pressing his head against the cool window from his place in the passenger seat next to their manager. 
Still, he couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at his lips as he thought about seeing you, probably curled up in the couch cheeks puffed from the snack you were inhaling. The pounding in his head lightened at the cute sight he would soon get to enjoy as he played with the loose threads of his old button up shirt. 
True to Sungjin’s imagination, your form was sitting on the couch. Not true to his imagination, you were actually bent over something in your lap, lightly humming and bopping your head to the rhythm being produced by your still clumsy fingers. The guitar in your lap had gotten lighter as the days went by without your boyfriend, and in replacement of his touch, leaving your fingertips warm and tingling, it was small cuts you hadn’t bothered to bandage as it disrupted you when playing.
 You missed Sungjin an abnormal amount. The cold spot in the bed or him making weird faces at you through the mirror in the mirror when brushing your teeth. You missed all of it. With a slight tremble in your chest you started playing the chorus to “You Were beautiful”.
You were so focused on trying to get it right you didn’t notice the door closing only to startle when you slightly looked up through your lidded eyes seeing the shadow looming over the coffee table. With a small yelp of surprise you jumped immediately looking up only to find your boyfriend staring at you with wide eyes. 
His surprised expression made you shrink into yourself. You threw your head into your hands in pure embarrassment letting the guitar gently slide off your lap, hitting the floor with a soft thump. “Can you just pretend you didn’t see that I can’t believe I even tried learning all that by myself I” you cut yourself off with an un-pleased sigh shaking your head and looking at him with pleading eyes. 
Your boyfriend continued in his frozen state for about five seconds before breaking out in the biggest smile rushing around the coffee table in which you panicked trying to get away from him with a squeal, but being too slow im the excitement that was usually in a much dormant state in Sungjin. The wrinkles near the corner of his eyes deepened adoringly, and his chest shook with soft laughter while he held you close. 
There was a fond twinkle in his eye as Sungjin forgot any tiredness that clung to his bones and kissed the tips of your fingertips while maintaining eye contact. He kept your hands encased in his when scolding you for having such low faith in yourself and softly encouraging you. He would probably put little stitch band-aids on your fingertips and continue teaching you, sitting you on his lap and scolding you when you lose focus with a sharp poke at your ribs smiling when you giggled. This man just fell impossibly more in love with you.
“You shouldn’t say those things, look at you love, learning all alone and doing so well. I'm so proud. Would you rather have the elmo band-aids or the stitch band-aids… I don’t know about you but Elmo kinda creeps me out. Just five more minutes little love then you can go mug Young k with Dowoon. Don’t look at me like that! You finally have a teacher and you take him for granted. The audacity-”
Jae
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Jae was a thin hair away from just ripping his hair out. He didn’t believe the kpop industry would take very kindly to him going bald, but he had come to a point where he didn’t really care about what people thought anymore. But thinking about you not being able to play with his hair anymore while he drifted off to sleep with his head on your chest severely upset him.
 Jae had gotten stuck in another limbo, stuck in the studio and in his own head desperately trying to finish any of the unfinished songs left in his computer files. He missed you so much, he eventually called it quits, deciding to go home to you, who he hadn’t seen in days.
Just the thought about seeing you energized his previously exhausted self. He never could get sick of you. Every day, every week was a new adventure, a new chapter, all with his favorite person in the world. The night sky, although beautiful, seemed to mock him, reminding him of how late it was, meaning you were most probably asleep. 
Opening the door to his apartment, he heard soft music. He briefly recognized “I Need Somebody”, and thought you were playing it from your phone. All his thoughts came to a halting stop when he saw you perched on the bed, in his shirt, playing the melody of the previously mentioned song.
You had hair falling into your eyes with your eyebrows slightly scrunched trying not to mess up and heavily focused. Jae had loudly yelled in surprise, causing you to flinch and look up shocked at the sudden surprise. When you saw it was just him, you had comically thrown your hands in the air yelling at him about how it was supposed to be a surprise. 
The irritated look on your face vanished as you went up to give him a light hug with a kiss, softly smiling at him. Meanwhile Jae, was completely out of it, lovestruck eyes while he instinctively returned your affection.
“Come Jae, you look like you haven’t slept in ages, your eyes are so sunken babe”, you had softly whispered to him, rubbing the soft skin under his eyes, the way you were always soft with him when he came back from the studio. You slept in the same bed for the first time in what had been days, Jae tightly clutching on to you.
 He may have not been completely there at the moment, but in the morning when he had time to process everything, he was a changed man. He wouldn’t stop laughing and giggling excitedly, eagerly wanting to hear everything you had learnt. He even poked fun at you when you made a mistake. But it was all lovingly as he also praised you non stop while looking at you with his messy hair and big smile next to you on the couch. He had so much inspiration now. To finish what had been left behind.
“Pop off queen who gave you this much talent, you couldn’t even tell me what bass was last time we talked, which was like a week ago. Might just make you play when I don’t feel like playing. Give you a wig and people won’t know the difference! Why are you booing me, I'm right?”
Young K
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Young K’s foot tapping on the floor of the car was the only sound that filled the car aside from the soft sound of the car’s engine and tires. He was absolutely spent, having to have stayed in a different city for a show he was invited to that was filmed far away from his home. 
Far away from you. Young K could tell his manager was starting to get irritated, but Young K was already massively annoyed and too far in his own world to really care. He missed the pine scent of his sheets, and he missed you.
It was not a good combination. When he got to his place he quietly thanked the manager,  getting his bag before trying to ignore every urge telling him to run into the building and fall into his soft bed with you in his arms. When he opened the door, your keys were there, so he knew you were in the building. That thought filled him with more relief than it should have. 
He did have to admit, hearing “I smile” this early in the day was odd as you usually saved the more mellow songs for later in the night. Young K told himself he had many euphoric moments in his life, but seeing you staring at a sheet of paper with so much determination and a bass guitar in your arms came pretty close to the top.
The absolute warmth that exploded in his chest was a feeling he would not forget in a long time. He could feel his lips slightly curl up in fondness as your hands shook while your eyes wavered unsurely between your hands on the strings and the video on your laptop sitting further on the edge of the bed. Your face scrunched up before you sighed and stared dejectedly at the instrument on your lap. 
“Why so sad love?" His voice made you instantly sit up, pushing the instrument gently off your lap. You crawled to the edge of the bed where Young K had already gotten closer where he met you tenderly running his hand through your hair, and he curved his hand around the back of your head bringing your forehead to his abdomen.
He brushed his thumb over where your hairline met the sensitive skin of the back of your neck immensely enjoying being back at your side. Your hands were clutching the back of his shirt, and your simple touch brought a warm feeling to his chest. You both leaned back as Young K’s chest started to rumble with laughter “You should have waited for me, it would have been easier if I could teach you”, he softly said, pushing your hair back from your face causing you to lightly laugh.
 “I wanted to surprise you, but I didn’t get that far anyways. Can’t become a prodigy in one day I guess”. Young K smiled again, promising to himself to help you as much as he could as he put his hand fondly on top of your head.
“You’re doing so good, just move your finger up a little, you’re plucking the c chord instead of the e chord during the chorus, don’t look at me like that i’m trying to help?! I wouldn’t put you on my level, but I think you’re doing really well. I’m hungry now, what do you want? No- What do you want? I am okay with anything just tell me-”
Wonpil
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Wonpil was trying his hardest not to think about you. From the way you got excited when you got to see the moon in the cloudy sky to the way you smiled when you saw the neighbor’s cat while getting the mail. 
He was happy to be on a trip with her sister, he hadn’t had much time to be with her in recent, well forever really. While you had been invited, you hadn’t been able to attend due to work. Wonpil did his best to keep his mind off you and enjoy the trip, he just hadn’t spent this long without you in a while. 
Even so, he still had a fun time with his sister and her boyfriend creating many memories. He didn’t regret it, but he was extremely happy to come back to you. Opening the door to your apartment, he dropped his suitcase by the door, an excited smile tugging at his lips as he traveled through the apartment with his arms spread knowing you would embrace him as soon as you saw him. He felt so giddy, he didn’t even notice the broken keyboard sounds ringing throughout the living space.
His smile fell in a comical way, his face morphing into one of confusion instead. He recognized a broken rendition of “Mary had a little Lamb”, and tilted his head as he opened the door to your room seeing you with really big headphones on your head staring down at the keyboard with the most offended look on your face.
 How dare this keyboard not give you its secrets! Wonpil couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his chest, not mocking you, but he just thought you were so cute. He lightly touched your shoulder causing you to jump, and the slight movement of your head caused the headphones to slide off your head. It didn’t matter much. You instantly dove into his arms, pressing the side of your face against his chest.
He felt warmth flood his chest as his hand encased the back of your head while he pressed his lips to the top, closing his eyes in bliss enjoying having you in his arms again. He leaned back from the brace as his eyes flashed with amusement and yours with slight embarrassment. He lightly laughed, eyes crinkling. He cradled your face in his hands, a teasing lilt to his voice, “What were you trying to do, hmm?” He could feel your face grow hot under his finger tips.
 “I was just trying to surprise you. I felt bad for not being able to go with you”. He shook his head, hands playfully pinching your cheeks as you whined. “You shouldn’t act that way, I understood from the beginning. It must have been hard for you. Here, come, your lovely boyfriend will make this easier for you”.
“Y/n the keys will not bite prEsS dOWn, no, no keyboards do not have to be oiled, this is a musical instrument not a mechanical vehicle. You are so cute. What am I gonna do with you? No, you can not play the keyboard with your forehead, DO NOT put your foot on the keys. I don’t care if it’s for the vine. 
Dowoon
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Dowoon was beating himself up. Looking back at what happened a few hours ago made his chest tight. He couldn’t help but wince at the words both of you had thrown at each other. You had been with each other for so long, and when his lovely mother asked him when he would propose, although with good intentions, it put pressure on him.
 He was still young. He had mentioned it to you in a joking manner, but there was a misunderstanding and you thought he was blowing it off as he didn’t see a future with you. 
Somehow feelings were hurt, and the fight escalated. And Dowoon decided he was a coward because it was when you had started stuttering through your words and avoiding eye contact, he knew. He knew he had pushed you across a line that might not be able to be crossed again. 
He panicked. He was really good at doing that wasn’t he? He left. He took a bus and went to the nearest hotel he could find. There he was sitting on the edge of the too perfectly made bed with his head in his hands.
Had he just ruined his precious relationship because he was scared of what the future could or could not hold? Why did he have to run away? Why couldn’t he just stay? Most importantly, how badly had he hurt you?
 With a sigh he stood up, and he got on the bus back to your apartment. Staring at the door, the fact you were just on the other side and hurting is what pushed him to open it with the key you had given him. Opening the door, he was met with silence and darkness. Have you already gone? He walked through the apartment, hope dwindling with every step. 
Then he heard a soft thump thump thump. His heart seemed to match with it, and as he walked to his studio which held his spare drum set, he thought of what he could say to make it better. Opening the door, he saw you softly hitting the drum with one stick, as if testing the waters and humming along to “When you Love Someone”. Dowoon couldn’t fight the sad smile that broke out on his face, and the absolute warmth that filled his chest. 
Why did he ever even doubt your future with him? There was no person more perfect for him than you. He stood next to you, softly taking your hand in his and guiding your hand to the right beat, although a bit broken. When your sad eyes looked up into his, forgiving in nature but still frustrated beyond belief, he knew he could still fix things. You were you, and Dowoon was Dowoon. You always somehow found your way back to each other.  
“No no, put your hands higher on the stick, no lower, now higher...a bit lower. No, Y/n drum sticks do not belong in my throat. What do you mean I have no room to talk, I thought we were over the fight. I would marry you in this life and the next! Why are you looking at me like that? I am not cute, I am handsome and overflowing with testosterone. Oooh are those gummies?
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dandunn · 3 years ago
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dont know if im allowed to double-dip and request another but id love to see 12 with lupjig for the mini-fic thing
Booooyoass I'm not gonna turn my nose up at writing jiglup especially when I should be asleep myself
12. Things you said when you thought I was asleep
"Hey dickhead, you awake?"
Lupin isn't sure what compelled him to stay quiet at Jigen's rough growl, or the finger prodding the back of his head. Maybe it had just been a long day, the thought of opening his eyes was more trouble than it was worth, and even focusing on trying to sleep felt taxing.
The man at his side grumbles, and Lupin feels the couch shifting, down then up. Soon he's being covered with fabric that stinks of the dark, heady musk of cigarettes and weary gunman sweat. Maybe a hint of blood, too. Jigen got hit, not as badly as Lupin did, but enough for the iron tang to drape itself over his nose.
His partner's blood - that he had bled for Lupin alone. He sighs softly and snuggles further under the jacket, wanting to pull it closer over his face and breathe it all in. A pity that his arms and shoulders are bandaged and too stiff to move.
"Jesus, you got torn up." Jigen mutters, tucking his jacket tighter over Lupin's body with fussy, irritated movements, even when he's bristling mad at Lupin, he still wants to make sure he's taken care of. "You really get off on worrying me, don't you?"
Lupin smiles to himself, hidden under the collar of the jacket, while rustles and clattering indicate Jigen is clearing up the mess of bandage wrappers and surgical equipment from the long, arduous process of stitching Lupin's shredded body back together. They've done it many times before, and will no doubt do it many times again in the future.
Even so, Lupin can see how much his partner hates doing it. He repairs each laceration and bullet graze with the bedside manner of a drunk orderly wearing sandpaper gloves. He curses and grabs Lupin with unnecessary force and bawls him out for being reckless and stupid.
And Lupin revels in every touch like it's the gentle blessing of a priest on his skin, because Jigen is touching him.
His partner hated being touched, when Lupin first met him. But he could usually tolerate it long enough when either one of them was in danger.
Necessary touch, becoming not-so necessary touch, turning into Jigen nudging Lupin's shoulder out of the blue one day as a 'hey, you did good' (which made Lupin feel like he could hop in the air and land on the moon).
The touches didn't stop after that, like Lupin was scared they would. No, instead one night he awoke from a drunken nap to find Jigen's head on his shoulder, his face lax and vulnerable with sleep.
And Lupin had leaned his head against his partner's head, and they had kept on sleeping. Like they had been doing it for years.
The rustling and clattering stop abruptly, and Lupin is in that curious stage of sleep where sleep can either pull you down or you can wake right up in an instant. He can feel Jigen's eyes on him.
"You're not allowed to run off and die," Jigen says quietly, his voice rough with emotion, "Not after what you did to me."
He sits down in front of the couch with an 'oof', "Who was it that said 'if you save a man's life, you're responsible for him' , Confucius? It's probably bullshit, people will say anything and then attribute it to some culture or other to romanticise its balls off, but whatever."
Lupin can hear him turn his way by the quality of his voice shifting, "You're responsible for me, you hear? And if you die, I'm going to damn well make sure it becomes someone else's problem."
Yeah, that sounds about right, he thinks.
Lupin smiles again, feeling the urge to titter, but sleep starts to pull him down for real this time, encouraged by his partner so close and the rough comfort he brings.
It's a heavy responsibility, but someone has to do it. And Lupin does it gladly.
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yongtxt · 5 years ago
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hundred [johnny]
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word count: 4.5k words
characters: boxer!johnny x doctor!reader
genre: fluff
warnings: blood/wound/stitches mentions, johnny hates hospitals but he likes the pretty doctor, [im not a doctor nor a boxer pls dont say that i have info wrong because I Know]
author’s note: i know this isnt long to some of u but to me it is and i havent written this much for so long im so proud of myself for finishing this:( it isnt that good but this is the first long fic ive written in a while and shhsdjk also i needed to get this out of my system ive thought about this au since that jcc came out where johnny and hyuck was doing muay thai plssss (i couldnt find a better gif tho) ok this is getting too long / feedback is appreciated tysm
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Johnny Suh hated hospitals with a burning passion.
It wasn't from a past trauma nor was he afraid of it, it wasn't that serious. He wasn't exactly sure what the cause of it really was. If he had to make a guess, it was probably from the accumulation of the little things, the insignificant factors people would usually dismiss but bothered him enough that it contributed to the big hatred he built for hospitals.
Maybe it was the distinct smell of hospitals, it reeked of death and old people. Maybe it was the atmosphere of the fluorescent-lit hallways, always gloomy and heavy. Maybe it was also the fact that the fees were so expensive and yet the food they provide tasted horrible, even the coffee was a hit or miss. The only upside he could think of was people get better in hospitals, but even that wasn't assured.
Despite how much Johnny despised hospitals, he always finds himself coming back. If he wanted to get better, he had no choice but to go. He would endure the gruesome process over and over again whether it be to treat his wounds or to stitch his cuts.
With his jaw littered with small bruises and his lips busted at the corner, he sat impatiently on the hospital bed as he waited for his doctor. He was fiddling with his fingers, knuckles bruised the same way his face was. He looked beaten up, he always did.
The clothes he wore contradicted the state he was in, they were fresh and laid back. He looked like a college student from the way he dressed. A delinquent more like, if one considered his cuts and bruises. Before heading to the hospital, he always makes it a point to shower and make himself appear presentable to the public. Although no one really bothers to take notice of his effort, only him.
The sliding door opened and Johnny's attention shot up from his phone, his gaze meeting with yours. Your head popped in, peaking through the small crack you made. Your eyes lit up in recognition as it always did whenever you see him.
"Youngho-ssi?" You spoke almost as if it was a question, voice barely above a whisper to make sure you were in the correct room, about to tend the correct patient.
Johnny didn't understand why you always did that, call out his name as if this was the first time you were seeing him. At that point, you've been already acquainted with him enough due to his numerous trips to the hospital. Either way, he nods every time.
You gave him a small smile, widening the door enough so you could enter. You wore a white lab coat, a name tag pinned to your chest and a stethoscope hung around your neck. You were small, although anyone compared to him was bound to be comparatively smaller – that wasn't the point, you looked young and that never fails to astound him every time you go through the door.
You had a clipboard in your hands, scanning through what he assumed to be his condition that a nurse had written earlier after a quick checkup and disinfection of his open wound. Your lips were formed on a tight line, eyebrows furrowed. He continued to stare at you with such amusement.
"You don't have to answer my question, Youngho-ssi, but why are you always here?" You finally broke the silence, startling him in the slightest. You never bothered to ask before, always just offering smiles and small talks while you did your work; maybe his sudden regularity of coming to the hospital recently made your curiosity peaked.
He couldn't blame you. Anybody would be curious why a 24-year-old man keeps coming back to the hospital with no clear explanation.
He cleared his suddenly dry throat, he never liked saying his job. He said, "I box for a living."
"Ah, that makes sense!" Your eyes visibly glimmered, absentmindedly jotting down notes on his medical records. "My coworkers and I thought you were in a gang or something."
"I don't think I would be allowed to be here if I was." He chuckled, making you giggle as well.
"Seo Youngho, 24, minor lip laceration in need of immediate suture." You read of his data from the clipboard, almost comically. It was medical terms he was unfortunately already too familiar with, to him, it basically meant that he had a busted lip that needs to be sewed shut.
"You can just call me Johnny. Youngho sounds too formal to me." He said nonchalantly. You nodded your head to his simple request; it probably was best if you got to know him better since he frequented the hospital so much.
"Alright, Johnny. We'll start the process now, okay?"
With keen eyes, he watched you slip on a pair of surgical gloves. You grabbed a tissue from the metal tray that sat beside him and began folding it into squares. He felt his heartbeat quicken, he hated getting stitches or any form of medical treatments for that matter, but as morbid as it was, he thought of it as punishment for his recklessness in the ring.
"Isn't boxing just, I don't know, senseless violence?" You asked, tone dripping with pure innocence and unadulterated interest as you gently dabbed away the remaining dried blood the nurse failed to clean earlier.
"It's a sport, it's how I bring money to the table." He pursed his lips, ignoring the twinge of pain that surged through his nerves. He visibly relaxed when you placed a hand onto his shoulder to reassure him.
Ever since the first time you got assigned to him, the first thing he took note of was the softness of your hands. You handled him as if he was fragile glass, despite how he easily towered over you. He felt pathetic as a 24-year-old but your gentle touches would greatly help put him at ease.
"I guess. I didn't mean to be rude." You were hesitant, Johnny could tell but he was glad you didn't push on any further. He couldn't handle explaining his occupation when you were about to pierce his skin. "Okay, Johnny, now that your lip is clean and the anesthesia had seeped in, we'll start. I think you know how it goes by now."
"Make it quick, please." He nodded, squinting his eyes shut at the mere contact of a surgical pen grazing over his gaped lips. You were relieved that his cut wasn't too big, you couldn't stomach the idea of putting him in too much pain for longer.
As you picked up the tweezers and string of nylon, you couldn't help but laugh at the six-foot boxer in front of you who was clearly petrified of getting stitches, "This will be done as soon as you know it. You won't really feel it because of the anesthesia, remember? Now count to a hundred backward for me."
Once the numb feeling of nylon dragged through his lips, he swore he saw white spots flicker in his vision. His eyes immediately watered and he tried his best not to squirm under your hold, beginning to count to a hundred backward like you had instructed him to. You admitted it to him the first time you stitched him that it was a trick that you learned from your pediatrician friend. Despite it being for children, it helped to get him distracted while you focused on your job.
Minutes felt like hours, Johnny had been fighting the urge to punch something, anything, to release tension and nerves. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he took a peak and tried to take his attention away from what was currently happening on his lip. His gaze landed on your pretty eyes, how it was narrowed in focus and how your lashes perfectly framed it.
This wasn't the first time he'd observe you up close, there had been many occasions in the past that you had been too close for comfort in order to tend his wounds. It had been too many that it was almost as if he was close to memorizing your features. You were not only beautiful but you were also a smart and capable doctor.
Eventually, you finished and started to rub ointment on his sore lip — the finishing line.
"Try not to eat anything spicy or hard. You know the drill." You grinned at his suddenly pale features, ripping off your gloves as his eyes adjusted to the bright lights of the room. "You're good to go. Be careful next time."
He let out a shaky breath, clearly still winded up from the procedure, "I'll try. Thanks again, doc."
-
The punching bag felt great against Johnny's fists. There wasn't a feeling in the world that could compare to the impact of leather slamming against his skin. He could last hours mindlessly pummeling the bag if his stamina just allowed him to.
Hyunsik, Johnny's manager and personal trainer, drew away from the punching bag he held in between his arms. He let out a breath and held out a hand to motion that Johnny has done enough.
Johnny was hurting, Hyunsik could see that much. The bandages he had wrapped for the boxer's fingers were turning into a shade of red that they were all too familiar with.
Hyunsik clicked his tongue, "You should've used your gloves."
"How can I grow stronger if I keep relying on them?" Johnny rolled his eyes. His muscles needed a boost and this seemed to be the only logical way to strengthen them — a little blood never hurt anybody.
"Someday you're gonna fracture your hand and you'll be forced out of the ring. Remember that." Hyunsik huffed, his voice stern. "Take them off, I'll clean the blood off."
Johnny reluctantly did as told, unfurling the bandages wrapped around his fingers. The pain was excruciating when the fabric grazed along his tender skin, he winced at the unsightly view of his reopened wounds.
Hyunsik led him back outside of the ring to the benches where the first aid kit was. He made the boxer sit down so he could start cleaning off his wounds. It looked horrific, more so than it usually did and he had no choice but to break the news to Johnny.
"It looks really bad. You need to go get that checked in the hospital and have it sewed back." Hyunsik said, taking a wet towel and carefully dabbing it across Johnny's bloodied knuckles.
He didn't want to go to the hospital. Going to the hospital to have his wounds treated meant that Johnny would be medically required to take days off work to let his hand heal. Johnny frowned, "Don't you have an ointment or something that could help? I can't afford to lose a day of practice."
"Don't you think I know that?" Hyunsik rolled his eyes. "As your manager, I want you to be in top shape for your match next week, even if it means sacrificing a day or two for you to heal."
Johnny could only nod. He sat through Hyunsik's lecture on the changes he should make to his dietary plan and the exercises he should do during his temporary break. It infuriated him that he couldn't do anything about it but nod along.
The incoming match that was set next week would make or break his career as an underground boxer. He didn't have the option of missing it because of some measly reopened wounds. If he had to rest to get better, he had no choice but to suck it up. This was his fault anyway for pushing himself too much.
Johnny showered in the locker rooms and changed into nicer clothes that didn't reek of blood and sweat. His hands were stinging but he shook it off.
He ignored the concerned looks other boxers were giving him and begrudgingly made his way to the hospital to get himself checked in. You wouldn't be happy to see him all bloodied again, he thought.
-
Much to Johnny's surprise, it wasn't you who was assigned to him. It was a much older doctor with graying hair and a nose stuck too far up in the air. She was rude and condescending, her lack of politeness to her patients was quite appalling. If Johnny wasn't in such a bad mood, he might've complained already.
God, this day couldn't get any worse.
With a meek voice, Johnny asked where you were and at the mention of your name, his doctor gave him a narrowed look. She sneered, "She's handling much more important cases. Does she know you?"
"I think so." Johnny gulped, unsure of the answer himself.
The doctor's grip was tight and she was hasty. It was as if she was trying to speed through the process to just get it over with. Johnny wanted to cry because he was starting to get traumatized by this doctor's procedure, he didn't want to hate the hospital more than he already did.
He internally screamed for your name as he watched the doctor pull on the gloves. The sliding door harshly whipped open and there you were in all your glory, like an angel sent from above to save him from the devil incarnate who was about to pierce his skin.
You were panting and the sheen on your forehead made it obvious that you ran your way to his room. Johnny's heart leaped with glee.
"Unnie, I'll handle him." You said, unable to catch your breath as you made your way inside. "I think the ER needs you more than me."
The doctor seemed hesitant at first but you tried to convince her otherwise. She eventually agreed and left you with Johnny who had a cheesy smile on his face the entire time since you've arrived.
"So Johnny, what happened this time?" You asked, picking up the clipboard that sat next to him on the bed.
"I overdid the punching during training and it reopened some old wounds on my knuckles. It hurts like a bitch."
You pulled a face, "That's a bit intense."
He chuckled, "It's normal."
"Can I please see it?" You opened your palm so he could place his hand on yours. You observed his cuts and the scabs that were beginning to form around it, it was too deep to let it heal on its own so you made the verdict that he needed to get it sewed back together ⁠— as unfortunate as it was since he was a boxer and he needed his hands to box.
You tugged on a new pair of gloves and began the painful procedure, Johnny started counting down even without you instructing him to. You quickly got to work and stitched back his wounds with your lip in between your teeth
Johnny felt squeamish, he could never get used to the feeling of stitches. His eyes were glued shut and he mumbled numbers like it was mantra.
Once you were done, you smiled fondly at your work. You managed to get by with fewer stitches and you felt pride swell up in your chest. Johnny noticed and, as lightheaded as he was, couldn't help but smile as well.
"You're pretty good."
"At stitching?"
Johnny nodded with his cheeks flushed, he made a mental reminder to smack himself in the head later for such a crude comment. You probably thought he was an idiot now.
"I sure hope so." You chuckled, making him blush even deeper if that was even possible. "It's part of my job."
Johnny shook his head in embarrassment, his dark hair bouncing from how vigorously he did it. He mumbled, "That sounded really lame and not smooth, I'm sorry. Please forget I opened my mouth."
You could only chuckle as you apply the ointment around his knuckles. He wanted the ground to open up and just swallow him whole.
"Please let this heal completely, Johnny. Don't apply any strain on your injuries for a couple of days and refrain yourself from carrying anything heavy so that the stitches won't rip." You said, carefully placing down his hand back on his knee. You were gentle as ever, Johnny swooned. "Absolutely no punching for a while."
"I have an important match at the end of next week. Is there any way to speed up the healing process?" Johnny asked, his eyes were almost pleading at you and you blinked at him in surprise.
"Apart from what I just said, there's really nothing else you could do." You pursed your lips, watching his expression visibly deflate. "If you want to have even a sliver of a chance at winning your match, I suggest you do as I say. Your stitches won't take too long to heal, I promise."
If Hyunsik was there with him, he would've probably already scolded him but the point would be the same. He had always prioritized Johnny's health above winning.
"Okay, doc. I'll do my best." Johnny said, defeated.
"You know, I always see the aftermath of your matches and your training. I want to see you in the ring next time when you're not bloody and beaten up yet." You smiled at him and you swore that all the color that was previously drained from Johnny's face came rushing back. "If it's okay."
"Are you serious?" Johnny asked, almost dumbfounded. Did the pretty doctor he'd been crushing on for months really just asked if she could watch his match?
You nodded with the same hue of red now tainting your cheeks.
"O-Of course! It's on Saturday next week! Please come and cheer me on!" Like a little kid, he excitedly rambled on about the details about the upcoming match and you nodded with the same enthusiast as you wrapped bandages around his hands.
You weren't from his world so everything he said sounded foreign to you. The terms he said, the infamy of his opponents, the prominence of it all — you were eager to learn it if it meant seeing him this happy.
You've always known that he hated hospitals. It was clear from the way he acted during your first meeting. He was stiff and tense, the body language he exuded just screamed that he wanted nothing more than to get the hell out of there. As he visited the hospital more and more, you noticed the hatred never faltered. He only became better at hiding it from you.
To see him so relaxed and carefree within the four walls he hated with all his being, it was a breath of fresh air and the feeling you had in your chest grew stronger.
"You're good to go. I promise to see you in your match." You were jotting some last-minute details on the clipboard and you missed the way Johnny kept grinning like an idiot. "As much as I love seeing you here, I hate that you keep getting yourself injured. Keep out of trouble for me, Johnny."
You left the room without letting Johnny say another word.
Fuck, Johnny realized he hadn't asked for your number.
-
Johnny's match started in ten minutes. His heart was pounding in his ears, he almost couldn't hear what Hyunsik was shouting to him.
The underground stadium was filled to the brim with people, he felt more nervous than he did during his first boxing match. A lot was at stake for this win, he needed the belt. He was desperate for it.
"Johnny, are you listening to me?" Hyunsik raised his voice, aggressively slapping Johnny's cheeks together in his hands so he could focus on him. The boxer's mind was fleeting and it was his job to pull him back to reality now.
He hadn't seen you since last week and as much as he wanted to go back to the hospital to see you, he refused to badly hurt himself in the days that led up to the match. Johnny scanned the crowd for your face but he couldn't see it. You weren't there.
At the lack of your turnout, he failed to mask his disappointment. Hyunsik let out an aggravated groan and pulled the boxer on his feet to berate him further.
"Johnny, please for the love of all things holy, look me in the eye."
"I'm sorry. I'm okay now. I'm listening."
"Good because your match is starting soon and I need you to win this. All your hardships and sacrifices boils down to this match, you hear me?" Hyunsik bellowed, trying his best to keep his voice louder than the cries and chants of the audience. "Show them what Johnny Suh is capable of!"
Johnny nodded fervently, forcing himself into a state of serenity of peacefulness. He let out heavy breaths to even out his breathing as his team surrounded him, prepping him for what was about to come.
Hyunsik raised his hand at Johnny. He had five minutes left until his match started and he wasn't calming down.
"Can I please have some water?" Johnny asked and his medic stumbled on his feet to fetch him a bottle from the nearby cooler. He couldn't help but let out a shaky chuckle, his team seemed tenser than he was.
He downed the bottle as soon as it reached his hand. His hand was shaky. Goddammit, why was he so nervous?
At the corner of his eye, he saw Hyunsik making his way over to the barricade that separated his corner to the rest of the stadium. He arched his neck in a way that would let him take a peek what was so important that Hyunsik had to leave his side when the match was starting in a few minutes.
It seemed like Hyunsik was trying to stop a girl who was forcing her way in through the barricade. His stomach lurched at the sight of her familiar face.
As if he was acting purely on instinct, Johnny shot up from his seat and ran towards you. Hyunsik held up his arm to stop him from going any closer to you. You could've been a deranged fan, for all Hyunsik knows.
"Johnny-"
"I know her."
Hyunsik was startled at his response and started to profusely apologize to you. You looked nothing but smug and Johnny let out a breathy laugh that helped unravel the knots in his stomach. The boxer quietly motioned for him to take his leave and Hyunsik hesitantly did as told only after tapping his wrist as a sign that time was ticking.
You bowed at him apologetically, "I'm so sorry I'm late! There was this damn patient-"
"It's okay. You're here now." He cut you off, a cheesy smile on his face. You easily reciprocated it back.
"I just came down here to wish you good luck." You said with the usual confidence in your tone gone and now replaced with a sudden timidness and bashfulness. "Not like you need it or anything."
"Where are you sitting?" Johnny asked, noticing that you were struggling to keep your attention on his eyes. He peered down and realized that he didn't have a shirt on, he chuckled.
You pointed near the walls of the stadium and he strained his vision to see so far away. He pursed his lips and let out a noise of discontent. You said that it was the only seats available because you were so late.
"Why don't you sit here with them? They wouldn't mind." Johnny said, jutting his thumb over to his team who was furtively watching his interaction.
"Oh no, it's okay."
"I insist. I want you to see me win up close."
You blushed a deep shade of scarlet and Johnny grinned at his successful attempt at a flirt. Was it even a flirt or was it an ego stroke? Either way, it didn't matter because you were smiling at him. You were easing his nerves and you didn't even know.
"I got out of my shift early so I wouldn't be in the hospital later to stitch you up." You teased, softly prodding his shoulder blade.
Johnny playfully puffed out his chest, "I don't plan on getting too injured today, I wanna look cool in front of you."
"Whatever you say, Johnny."
"But I'm nervous. I'm actually really nervous today." Johnny mumbled as if he didn't want anyone else in on your conversation, gone all traces of his cockiness as his heart thudded erratically against his chest when he heard Hyunsik's call of the last minute until he has to go inside the ring.
You gingerly reached for his taped hands and gave it a gentle squeeze, "Just count back from a hundred like I always tell you to. You'll do fine."
"Wait for me after the match, okay?" And so you did.
Counting down the numbers, Johnny clambered inside the ring and the bell rang to signal the start of the match. Being in the medical field meant that you were against all forms of violence so you couldn't really watch the entirety of the match without feeling sick to your stomach. Johnny didn't care, he was just happy that you kept your promise and was cheering him on.
It was hectic and everything was happening all at once. It was loud and everybody was screaming. This wasn't your world, it was Johnny's and your heart fluttered at the thought that he was willing to let you in it.
Eventually, the match ended in Johnny's favor and the next thing you knew, you were being hoisted up in the air. You had the biggest smile on your face, similar to Johnny's who now had a shiny belt slung over his shoulder. All his hard work and all his trips to the hospital paid off.
"Congrats on your win!" You exclaimed, placing your palms on his chest to steady yourself.
"I wanted you to see me get the belt." He admittedly sheepishly, reaching out to hold your wrists in his bruised hands.
"Aren't you hurt in any way? We can drop by the hospital if you want." You asked, checking to see if he had any major injuries but true to his word, Johnny was inflicted little to no injuries during the match, exclude the few bruises on his jaw and a busted lip
"Actually, I'd rather we get some coffee instead." Johnny said, the small smile on his lips making you chuckle.
"I'm sorry, I don't date my patients." You smirked at Johnny's crestfallen expression, softly shoving his side to make it known that you were only joking.
Johnny pulled a face, releasing a breath he didn't realize he was holding once he realized your joke. He played along, "I think you can make me an exception, I don't usually invite people to my matches."
"So this is about getting even, huh?" You were teasing him and now your faces were merely inches apart but before Johnny could even think of leaning in, you spun around and grabbed his hand once more. "C'mon then, my treat!"
Johnny let out a laugh. A boxer and a doctor, who would've thought?
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charming-2d-boys · 4 years ago
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Hi, I just want to say that I really love your writings and they actually really help me relax after a hard day!😊But today i just wanted to feel pain, so can I please have a dying! reader headcannon with Chrollo. If you do write for these, Im really sorry if you dont.
Oh, anon, who hurt you? I'll make myself cry, most probably 😭
Anyway, thank you and I'm glad to hear that! 😄 And thank you for the request as well! I hope you'll enjoy this! 🙇
A/N: the idea sorta came while listening to A Grave Mistake by Ice Nine Kills (I love the live version from SiriusXM, like please 😭💞). And I was so close to writing a scenario and then I read headcanons and I just kinds stopped like oh, yeah 😂
Warning: very long, angsty, description of injuries and death
you’d never thought it could hurt so badly
or that there’d be so much blood
but, alas, that was the unfortunate situation you found yourself in
the several gashes you’d acquired during your fight were making you dizzy from blood loss
your attacker had died a few seconds before, blood still flowing from the stomach wound you gave him
that was also the only serious hit you managed to land on him
unfortunately, you just knew that it only saved you for a bit more time
you had barely managed to get out your phone, only to see the screen cracked
and you were honestly scared it wouldn't work, but you felt relief when the screen lit up
you called Chrollo, but you had to put the phone on the ground, next to your ear
you had never felt happier to hear his voice
if only you could see him one last time as well...
Hello, love! And Happy Anniversary! Where are you? I hope you're on your way because I wouldn't want dinner to get cold-
Chrollo...
he suddenly went quiet as he heard you and you could hear shuffling in the background
(Y/N), where are you?
you told him, wheezing when you felt a sharp pain in your side as you tried to breathe in more air
you heard more shuffling before the city noise filled the background on the other end
Stay on the phone with me. Tell me what happened.
it hurt so badly to talk
your throat felt as dry as bone and also wet and the taste of blood was prominent
but you tried to talk, telling him about the one who attacked you while on your way home and how you tried to defend yourself, but their Nen far surpassed yours
apparently, your attacker had friends who wanted to destroy the Spider as well
and they would cling to anything that would hurt them or get them closer to the Phantom Troupe
you’d rather tell your boyfriend about this face to face, though
you did laugh and you heard his chuckle when you told Chrollo about the fatal hit you inflicted on your attacker
but when he asked you how bad your injuries were, you couldn’t answer
what were you supposed to say?
that you’d never seen so much blood in your entire life?
or that you could feel yourself slipping away?
(Y/N)? Talk to me, darling. I’m almost there. Just keep talking.
you told Chrollo about the cake you had bought and how you wanted to go on a date the next day or just sleep in and spend the entire day celebrating at home
he only hummed, hurrying over to you as fast as he could
good thing Shalnark installed an app on your phone that allowed Chrollo to pinpoint your location with accuracy
he swore he’d only use it in case of emergency and he’d kept his word
Chrollo felt his heart drop into his stomach when he saw your figure and all the blood surrounding you and the figure a few meters away from you
(Y/N)? I’m here now. Everything’s going to be fine, okay?
his hand caressed your cheek while the other hovered over your waist, where most of the blood seemed to come from
you leaned into his touch, smiling at him despite all the pain you felt and the numbness that started to overtake your limbs
Chrollo had already called Machi to heal you and Feitan, more for reinforcement than anything
and a few seconds later you could both hear them rapidly approaching you
Machi, please.
she only nodded and got to work, with Feitan going over to your attacker and inspecting him closely
Chrollo held your hand the entire time, smiling down at you and kissing your knuckles, hoping that you’d be saved and coming back with him injured, but alive
Machi managed to stitch most of your wounds and the bleeding stopped, but you were still pale and trembling from all the blood loss
How are you feeling, love? Better?
you wanted to say yes, just to keep that hopeful sparkle in his eyes
but you couldn’t
No... It hurts a lot... I don’t think I’ll-
Stop. Don’t say it.
Machi had gotten up and taken a few steps away from the two of you, still hearing you, but giving you some privacy
she’d done her best and you were thankful for that
you had felt her hands tremble slightly
you were friends and her boss’ lover
the idea of someone else she grew close to dying was making her sick
and Chrollo felt the same way
despite being around death so often and for his entire life, he still hated the idea of someone he cared about leaving his side like this
it was too soon
he still had so many things he wanted to experience with you and show you
he couldn’t lose you just like that
it wasn’t fair
there were tears forming in his eyes and you felt your heart clench in pain and pity when they started descending down his cheeks
your fingers wiped them away, the dry blood on your fingertips leaving faint marks where they got the blood wet again
Shhh... Don’t worry, we’ll meet again one day. Okay? And I’ll watch over you. So don’t cry anymore, please.
you were no better since you were crying as well
it really wasn’t fair
you didn’t want to die
you didn’t want to leave Chrollo
and seeing him actually react like this really moved you
as cool and charming as he always acted, even with you for the most part
you really didn’t think that he felt so strongly about you
you kissed the top of his head lightly as his face rested over your neck, lips pressing over the still warm skin and moving as if he was mumbling
or praying
Chrollo, sweetheart, please, look at me.
his eyes were teary and a little bloodshot as his hands were holding tightly onto yours
you looked so pale, but you still smiled at him
and Chrollo felt his heart crack
because it was his fault
he should’ve kept you safe
he was still trying not to be loud
and only you could see his face and feel his trembling hands
It’s not your fault. Understood? Don’t blame yourself. I want you to promise me this.
he couldn’t do that and you knew it
he’d always feel some guilt because this could’ve been avoided
if only he’d been with you, he could’ve protected you
just like he promised you
and he broke it
I promise.
he knew how stubborn you were sometimes
you wouldn’t take no or I can’t for an answer
not this time
I love you, (Y/N). I’ll always do.
his voice was anything but loud
this was only for you to hear and no one else
not even Machi or Feitan
So will I, Chrollo. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone, alright?
you smirked playfully, though even you felt like it was a pitiful attempt at making everything more light-hearted
he cracked a broken smile and kissed your forehead, arms slowly lifting you up so he could hug you properly
you hugged him back tightly, hand going through his hair as his hands clung to your torn clothes, feeling the dry blood that had soaked through
it honestly hurt to stay like this
but it didn’t matter anymore
even now, you felt safe in his arms
his cologne always brought you this feeling of familiarity and home
and his skin was so warm that you never wanted to part with him
but you slowly started feeling even more sluggish
there were black spots gradually growing in size and numbers and you closed your eyes, letting your other senses heighten
his breathing was ragged but still quiet
his fingers were digging into your skin only a little
his grip tightened just as yours started to weaken
you could only press a kiss to his shoulder before you felt a few more tears fall onto your skin
if only you could apologise for making him cry, you would’ve done it
but you could barely open your mouth to utter a whimpered sorry
and the last thing you heard was Chrollo, thanking you for loving him
as he got up, with your lifeless body in his arms, cradling you protectively
Chrollo looked down at your face
you looked as if you were sleeping
just like that time when you went to an amusement park and he had to carry you home because of how tired you were
if only there wasn’t so much blood and your body was warmer
Machi and Feitan were looking at the both of you without saying a word
Machi’s eyes were shining with unshed tears
while Feitan grimaced behind his mask
things would never be the same now that you were gone
he could already sense the change in Chrollo
Feitan, do you know who he is?
Yes, seen him before. Yakuza from the northern side of the city. Had a clash a few months ago.
Chrollo only nodded and his fingers tightened their grip a little over your skin that was growing colder
Let’s head back. After all, we should forgive our enemies. But not before they are hanged.
Chrollo and the other two Spiders walked away from the scene in silence
every memory the two of you had built over time, good or bad, was burnt into his mind and kept replaying
he glanced at you again
you would never be forgotten
you would always be loved
Chrollo swore this
and swore to get even and kill them all
revenge is a confession of pain
and he had never felt so much of it before
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masculinepeacock · 3 years ago
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writer ask game!! i was tagged by @itsthecamouflage @supercantaloupe @buckysbears
What’s your all-time favourite ship?
ooooh all time favorite is hard. right now my brain is in kastentatia mode, but i'm also obsessed with colin/isaac so it's hard to decide
How many works do you have on AO3?
i have an even 50!
What’s your total AO3 word count?
i'm at 124,622! but i've also taken a few longer fics off bc i wanted to finish them lmao
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1. The Power of a Good List which is a Marvel fic that exists within someone else's fic universe!! outsider POV my beloved <3 (165 kudos)
2. love with every stranger, the stranger the better, my unfinished sansaery GBBO fic that i wanna finish so bad. when will my muse return from war (140 kudos)
3. hit me with your sweet love, steal me with a kiss, this was my first ted lasso fic and honestly i'm really proud of it so im glad it's on the list (104 kudos)
4. got a lotta love to give, i never expected people to read my dad!colin fic so the fact that people liked it? i love it (95 kudos)
5. The Council, riz and the bitchy besties!! absolutely one of my fav things i've ever written, riz POV my beloved (79 kudos)
Do you reply to comments, why or why not?
i do!! i love seeing comments and even if i just reply in emojis i try to respond to all of them!
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
idk if any of my fics have truly /angsty/ endings? but some of my fics that are just like cutoff convos are pretty angsty? most of them are in my faeth family feels tag!
What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
honestly i do go hurt/comfort a lot, or like emotionally sappy, but my happiest fic is probably my sandra lynn/jawbone kitchenware fic, or my brancella gbbo au
Do you write crossovers?
i did one crossover fic for the d20 alphabet challenge!! i will not link it <3
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
i don't think so? i've gotten some comments that i weren't Sure, but i've chosen to take them as compliments
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
nope! i've done some fade to black stuff but no real smut
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
no?? i dont think so
Have you ever had a fic translated?
i have not! but it'd be really cool
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
i have! @shelbychild and i co-wrote a Jasiper Princess Diaries fic for the PJO Big Bang
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
not really?? i mean i really want to finish the fig electra heart au but i might make it a series rather than like a chapter fic
What are your writing strengths?
i like to think dialogue! but i also know it's not my Best. i do a lot of descriptions but tbh i do like my one liners, or using one line to get what i'm trying to say across. i also like to think that i'm good at building tensions in scenes/i don't post if often but writing horror/gore
What are your writing weaknesses?
i know i said i like to think i'm good at dialogue, but i also know that sometimes i'm not. and also like pre planning gets me all the fucking time. i always go back and fuck with my outlines when i do make them, they never stay the same
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
i personally don't do it, but that's also because i don't fully trust my ability to know when someone would switch to another language. i know a lot of immigrant who do switch languages pretty often, but i also know it all depends on family structure/the character so i just avoid it for myself
What was the first fandom you wrote for?
i think PJO?? but i also probably wrote fic as a kid i forgot about
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
ooh i really like my aelwyn and old people fic. i'm also proud of my fig and fabian fics, but particularly stitch by stitch i tear apart!
tagging anyone who wants to!!!
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logan-is-noggin · 3 years ago
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Wisdom Teeth
Summary: bucky takes care of you after getting your wisdom teeth removed.
word count- 1081
y/n woke up in a reclined chair that was covered in plastic, fluorescent lights flickered and she groaned from it stinging her eyes. a woman in matching blue shirt and pants with a paper mask pulled over her nose walked over to where she lay. " how are you feeling y/n? finally waking up, i see." she narrowed her eyes slightly at the nurse. " wath i not awake? i thought i wath." she said stumbling around the words. the nurse smiled. " you were napping for a bit while got our work done." " what wor-" she tried to talk around the gauze filling her mouth. the nurse stepped to the side of her chair. she reached her hand into y/n's mouth and pulled a red wet clump from one cheek, then the other. y/n looked up at her with disgust. " why am i bleeding!" " you had your wisdom teeth removed. your gums will be bleeding for a while, dont worry." you blinked a few times, your body suddenly feeling very heavy, letting yourself fall back against the chair. after placing new gauze in its place, the nurse stepped away leaving y/n with her thoughts. using her tongue, she counted her teeth. " one, two, three..." she mumbled. several times she had to start over because she couldn't figure out where tooth number fifteen started and tooth fourteen ended. while she was busy counting she didn't notice the nurse back with a wheel chair. the nurse pressed a lever that lifted the back of the chair to an upright position. " c'mon, your friends are here to take you home" she helped y/n stand up and sit down in the wheel chair. "-was counting." she complained, but the nurse just pushed the chair forward. the sudden movement made y/n's head spin and she gripped the arms of the chair. ' slow down!' but when the nurse didn't, she realized she musnt have said anything out loud. when y/n was brought into the waiting room of the hospital, bucky was at the front desk talking to the receptionist. she handed him a zip-lock bag filled with something and a few papers. the nurse had helped you out of the chair as bucky greeted you. " how are you feeling, doll?" you tilted your head in confusion" i thought i was a human." y/n proceeded to pinch a piece of skin to check that they were indeed still made of flesh. bucky shook his head. " they drugged you up good, huh?" he wrapped his covered metal hand around your waist and guided you out of the hospital. " you remember what you came here for?" bucky quizzed " of course. i sold them my teef-" y/n mumbled. you reached for your mouth, the gauze was beginning to bother you, but bucky took your hand in his " ah, ah. dont go messing with your mouth, you might mess up the stitches." " bu' mouf hurts' " you complained with a frown. y/n and bucky reached his car, Sam was waiting, his phone in hand. " we'll take care of the pain once we get home." he promised. you nodded. " can i drive?" you slurred reaching for the driver side door. " um no, id like to live please." Sam said as he laughed. you noticed Sam had his phone in his hand and he followed you with it. bucky opened the back seat and made you duck your head so you wouldn't hit it. " get in back with her so she doesn't try anything.." " why cant i drive?" Sam said back. " you didn't have to come with me, but you wanted to film her right?" Sam acquiesced and the three made their way home.
FRIDAY announced their return as they stepped out of the elevator into the compound. bucky still supported y/n as she walked, Sam followed, phone at the ready in case your drug attled brain came up with any more comedic ramblings. tony and Bruce were looking at a white board when Sam came up to them. it was also tonys idea to get y/n on camera after getting surgery, he had done the same when peter got his wisdom teeth removed the previous year.
" you guys have to watch this!" Sam said excitedly as he handed tony his phone, " just hit play.
the recording showed y/n in the backseat, she was writing something with her finger in mid air while she spoke " but the symbol for iron is Fe, and man is the same as male. so technically, iron-man translate to Fe- male. that makes iron-man a woman." then all that was heard was Sam and buckys laughter.
tony paused the phone and tossed it back " jokes on all three of you, peppers made that joke five times since mark II." bucky had taken y/n down one of the hallways that led to her apartment.it was so everyone that lived at the compound had a private space. he opened the door and helped y/n sit on her bed. she kicked her shoes off and pulled them under her. she tried to pull her blanket around her shoulders but it was stuck under her. when bucky came back with a glass of water he helped wrap the blanket around her. " 'kay, the doctor gave me this list to help you recover. " he opened the zip lock bag and pulled a pile of gauze out along with a smaller bag of capsules. " " first i gotta take the gauze out."  he had a piece all folded up at the ready. " open up doll.." so she did
" i miss you." bucky gave y/n a confused look as he reached into her cheeks to pull the bloodied gauze out. " what are you talking about, im right here." she shook her head. " no. we shouldn't 'ave broke up." she said, mouth fill of fresh gauze. bucky winced ever so slightly, knowing it wasn't right to talk about that subject with you inebriated. he handed y/n a pill and helped her take small sips till it went down. " we- we can talk about that stuff later, right now you should get some rest." y/n laid down, wrapping herself tighter in the blanket, and was soon asleep, the medicine quickly taking over. bucky watched her for a minute until her breathing evened out. he bent over, pressing a quick kiss to y/n's head before closing the door behind him as he left.
Part two
it was a few hours later since bucky had left y/n passed out in her room. bucky had spent all evening replaying those words in his head. thanks to the serum, he was able to hear when there were movements coming from y/ns room, and bucky went to go check on here, and more importantly, get some answers
bucky and y/n had dated for a while after she joined shield a while back, and bucky wouldn't admit it to anyone else, but when y/n broke things off after a measly four weeks of dating, it hurt.
bucky knocked on the semi open door of y/ns room and waited until she acknowledged him " hey, come in." she sounded much more sober than the last time they spoke. y/n was currently folding up a piece of gauze and tucking it into her gums where the teeth had been recently removed " whaths up?" she tried to speak around the cotton
" just wanted to check on you, see if you needed help." he said casually, " looks like the drugs wore off. you were acting pretty crazy for a while before." he said with a smirk.
" and i know the guys aren't gonna let me live down whatever i did to embarrass myself this time." she agreed. bucky sighed as he took a step inside the room further, " actually, i was hoping we could talk about something" he asked nervously, but y/n didn't seem to notice this and simply pat the spot on the bed, so bucky sat down
" before you passed out, i was changing your gauze, you said that you missed me. like, when we were dating.." y/ns eyebrows knit closer together " i did?" bucky nodded y/n shrugged " i guess i was just feeling sentimental. " she did remember the good moments they had together
" you also said you wanted to get back together. and i wanted to know, do you?" the question pained the both of them, and there was a silence that filled the space before y/n shifted in the bed " theres part of me that wishes we could, but i broke up with you remember?"
bucky nodded " i still think it was a sad excuse-"
" i know it was. but its the truth, my only experiences with guys lead up to me getting hurt. all forms of love ive witnessed only ends up with heartbreak, i was only trying to save you the trouble of getting attached and getting hurt like i did." she admitted.
"for what its worth, the last thing i ever want is to hurt someone,and how do you know if you never give us a real chance?" he asked
" you're right, and maybe once i dont have too many holes in my head, we could try again?" y/n asked softly. bucky leaned forward and kissed her forehead " id like that."
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honeypirate · 4 years ago
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Looking Forward To It
In which pro hero Dynamight falls for his high school crush and personal suit designer and scientist, you, and asks you out.
Bakugou x reader (could be gn or fem but i didn’t edit it so i dont remember)
readers quirk works like welding but only works on metals, went to UA as a support student but took extra hero course classes so you could be a hero if any metal villians were to come along. Bakugou and you were friends after second year when you made him a really amazing support item and loved explosions as much as he does. you agreed with him that Lord Explosion Murder was an amazing hero name and that sealed your friendship forever.
Bakugou walks into the warehouse, a smile on his lips, he’s been looking forward to this meeting for several reasons, the biggest reason being you and the second being he is so excited to see what you have made. You were the student behind the design of his current hero suit and since you have grown up you became one the most well known designers and scientists. He has a small jar in his hand of his glycerin like liquid that you needed a little of, for a new idea, the meeting was just supposed to discuss your thoughts and share with him your ideas.
The warehouse was set up with a small office in the front, followed by a few meeting rooms, a public bathroom, and the biggest part being your “office” but it was more like just a work floor for you and your employees to have enough space. There was also an armored testing room and a room in the back where you could sleep that had a full bathroom with a shower.
“She’s in the back Dynamight you can go on in” your receptionist says with a smile and he thanks her before heading back into your office/work area.
As he is making his way back to you he hears a small ecplosion followed by your frustrated voice echoing down to him “Mother fucking bitch! God damn it all! That was not my plan! Mother hell!” he chuckles as he pushes the half cracked door open all the way “Y/N?” he says and you laugh, a sound that makes him smile and brings butterflies to his stomach, followed by your voice “back here!” he walks farther into the room, bast the many tall shelves lined with several different ingredients and different power tools all organized specifically by color, followed by several bins with different metals, he can see your back as you sit at a metal table, a few lights around you and smoke still in the air. As he gets closer he can see the tools around you, things that he didn't even recognize, tools you once told him you designed, and things that look like metal capsules. You hop off your stool and turn towards him “right on time!” you exclaim with a blinding smile that makes his heart skip, you throw your arms around his neck and he chuckles as he hugs you back. When you pull away you pull the dark goggles off the top of your head and set them down on the table. “You bring it?” he nods “of course! I’m excited to see what you have for me” he says and you squeal ''I am too!” you hold out your hand and he places the jar in it. 
You stand next to the table and he stands besides you, “watch this” you say with a smile as you put a metal dropper into the golden liquid in the small jar and get out .5 of an ounce before placing it into a small metal capsule, placing a special lid on and sealing the edge with your quirk. “This is kind of dumb becasue you wont use them very often if at all. But this topper makes it so this will explode on impact and then suck everything back to that space like an implosion. And this top” you hold up a different unconnected piece “is a timer. So its a real bomb!” you say excitedly and he chuckles, your happiness rubbing off on him. “That is really cool I must say. Even if i don't use it often it is a cool option to have” you grin “i'm glad you think so. I felt kind of dumb but i still wanted to try. Do you want to see this?” you hold up the capsule you just made and he laughs “of course!” you bounce on your toes in a little dance as you take off your leather apron and set it on the desk  “okay follow me!” he laughs and follows you out the door off the side of your office, into teating room you made specifically to test Bakugous support items. 
“Okay okay okay you know where to stand” he laughs, he loved your energy and your mind, he stood where you wanted him, behind a very thick piece of plastic so he could see into the other side of the room, you squeal again with glee and walk into the other side of the plastic, you kiss the little capsule and then toss it to the other side of the room, moving over quickly next to Bakugou as it sails through the air before it hits the other side of the wall and explodes before sucking everything back to the middle point of impact exactly like you hoped it would. “Yes!” you exclaim and raise your hands in the air, turning towards him and hopping up and down. “That was amazing y/n!” he laughs and you blush at the way he was looking at you. “I know it isn’t super practical but at the right time it would be fun to use!” you tuck your hair behind your ear and then gasp, bringing your hands out in front of you “I didn't realize i was so dirty” you chuckle, realizing some must be on your face but you didn’t really care. 
“Yeah just a little but that’s how i know you’re making super amazing things!” he gushes and then blushes, clearing his throat “you said you have something for me?” you beam at him “that’s right! Come with me it’s just inside” he follows you back to your office and you quickly run and grab a box from under your desk, “I know you are a huge fan of your black, green, and orange, color scheme. But I made some improvements to stitching and flexibility, with a better flame resistant formula that actually keeps you cool as you wear it. I also wanted to try a semi different color scheme so just tell me if you hate it and I'll make it just the same as your others. But i was thinking since it’s fall and going to be winter,” you pull out a new suit, identical to the last save a few details, the orange bands were thinner and lighter, and now they were a darker blood orange. The black was even more black, a higher percentage of light being lost than the other black (thank you stuart semple) and the green being a darker green as well, more foresty and less tree frog. “I thought the darker colors would look AMAZING when it snows and the orange is more fall. There are even several hidden pockets that make whatever is inside them indestructible, so your phone, wallet, whatever will be safe no matter what”  He takes the suit from you with a smile “y/n this is …. Perfect!” you laugh “really?!” he nods “i love the new colors it’s perfect for winter and i love the pockets. Im gonna go change in your bathroom” and before you can stop him he is off into your private bathroom in the back of the office. 
You hop on your stool and begin making more of the little capsules, just three more with the amount of his Nitroglycerin substance. You place them in the box and then work on some other personal project of something you were making for your moms birthday.
When he comes back he walks quietly since he was behind you “tell me what you think” he says and you grin, setting down your tools you turn around and gasp with a smile “it is so much better than i imagined. Is it too tight? How is the fabric? Is it itchy?” you hop off your stool and make your way over to him while you talk, reaching out and running your hands across his chest to feel how it fits, running your hands across the straps to make sure they fit him well, as he begins to speak you walk around to his back side “n-no it’s all great. R-really” you run your hands across the fabric on the back, the tank like top on his shoulders sat well, you stuck your fingers inside the fabric by his shoulders, pulling it back a little and running your fingers along the inside seam, down until you get to his armpits. 
What you didn’t know was how hard his heart was beating, you always got into the headspace of an inventor every time you gave him something new, not noticing the effect you had on him, how his heartbeat grows rapid and his hands get really sweaty, filling up his gauntlets. You never noticed how he blushed or how his voice stuttered through answers to the questions you ask. You check the way his belt fits on his hips and he gets goosebumps that you, you guessed it, didn’t even notice. 
“It looks so good. I'm so proud of myself!” you  giggle as you walk back to the box on your table, your back to him again now, he takes a deep breath and tries to calm his heart. “I have improved your gauntlets as well, the color and the weight, they can also hold double the amount now so since you wear them all day you won't waste any. Also here is a new head piece, it’s built in with bluetooth so you can connect it to your phone and it will perform voice commands, you can set the word that wakes it up through an app i made that i already emailed you.” he chuckles “always going above and beyond. That’s why you're my favorite” your heart skips and your cheeks flush as he comes over, swapping out his gauntlets and head piece for the new ones, he places his old gear in the box and smiles at you. “I’m glad I can make you happy yet again” you say and smile at him, thinking about all the other ways you wish you could make him happy 
Since you didn’t have anything else for him, it was time for him to leave. You hated this time because it always comes too soon, you walk him out to the door and your receptionist sends you an obvious look before she excuses herself to the bathroom. “So i’ll.. uh.. text you if i have anything new for you” you say with an awkward chuckle, scratching the back of your neck before placing your hands behind your back, rocking on your feet “sound’s good” he says with a smile and you heart skips again, your cheeks feel warm as you return his smile. “Okay then” you say and he goes to push the door open “I’ll see you around.” he pauses for a second and then turns back “do you wanna get dinner with me maybe? As a date?” he asks, rather quickly actually, all of it out in a rush, his nervousness showing. You gasp before chuckling softly “I’d love that” you say with a closed eye smile and he lets out a breathy, nervous laugh. “Okay. cool. I knew you’d say yes (he didn’t. He thought you were definitely going to say no). I’ll call you after work then” he says, a blush covering his cheeks, you beam at him and then say “I’ll be looking forward to it”
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rocksong · 3 years ago
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get to know me tag 🦋
thanks merry @hyuckie for tagging me 💞
tagging @haechanv and @n1kisupremacy 
1. When is your birthday? march :^)
2. What is your favorite color? it changes all the time but I particularly love green lately
3. What’s your lucky number? i don’t have one
4. Do you have any pets? i have a cat 🐈
5. How tall are you? not very
6. How many pairs of shoes do you own? like 4 i think but one of them is my moms that i just kind of stole
7. Favorite song? i dont have a single favorite song of all time but ive been obsessed with aespa’s next level ever since it released. truly life changing
8. Favorite movie? lilo and stitch, tangled, school of rock, napoleon dynamite, HSM2.......
9. Who would be your ideal partner? someone whose humor matches mine ig sry boring answer idk
10. Do you want children? i already have a cat
11. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? what are u a cop
12. Baths or showers? showers but i enjoy baths too
13. What color socks are you wearing? im not wearing any rn 🥸
14. What type of music do you like? idk anything interesting ig
15. How many pillows do you sleep with? 2 but sometimes i use my bigger stuffed animals as pillows too
16. What position do you usually sleep in? on my stomach with an arm under my head yes my neck hurts
17. What you don’t like when you are sleeping? i dont like sleeping in the same room as other ppl lol
18. What do you typically have for breakfast? i dont usually eat in the morning but if i do.... fruit or something.. had a plum today :)
19. Have you ever tried archery? no and i probably shouldnt i cant see shit 
20. Favorite fruit? raspberries and mango<3
21. Favorite swear word? dolphin noises
22. Do you have any scars? no
23. Are you a good liar? i hope so
24. What is your personality type? INTP 5
25. What is your favorite type of girls? i like when girls r overly excited and laughing a lot
26. Are you an innie or an outie? innie... what 
27. Left or right handed? right
28. Favorite food? coconut rice+mango
29. Favorite foreign food? thai or mongolian food probably
30. Are you a clean or messy person? i am clean with certain things and messy with others....
40. Most used phrase? man i dont know. you know what. probably “man” bc i never know what to say
41. How long does it take for you to get ready? idk 15-20 mins probably
42. Do you talk to yourself? yes someone has to
43. Do you sing to yourself? i think i hum more than i sing
44. Are you a good singer? for sure
45. Biggest Fear? none of ur business xP
46. Are you a gossip? not really but ill listen if someone rlly wants to share
47. Do you like long or short hair? probably short.. less to dye.
48. Favorite school subject? art and math
49. Extrovert or Introvert? definitely introvert
50. What makes you nervous? most things in life😏
51. Who was your first real crush? ...real?? one of my friends in highschool 
52. How many piercings do you have? i love piercings but i just have 2 lobe piercings on each ear cuz im too lazy to take care of them. i dont even wear earrings. ive wanted a vertical labret for the longest time but ill probably never actually get it 
53. How fast can you run? how should i knoww
54. What color is your hair? green
55. What color are your eyes? green
56. What makes you angry? myself when I can’t word my thoughts properly
57. Do you like your own name? yea its alright
58. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? neither
59. What are your strengths? idk i have cool hair...
60. What are your weaknesses? lazy💃🏻
61. Color of your bedspread? white
62. Color of your room? red
If u read all this thx ig🥳
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ghostofcitrus · 3 years ago
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hmmmmmmmmmm. very gender.
so.... i think here’s a good metaphor
gender=clothes. not actual clothes, this isn’t about fashion, clothes are a metaphor for how i’m trying to process gender.
i feel like girlhood is a not quite uncomfortable garment of clothing. i was given it at birth. i grew up in it. it’s served me well.
but it’s not the real clothes that i was born in. the more i start to remove aspects of the “girl” outfit... the less comfortable it is when i have to put it back on. the more frequently im upset by it.
i like some of it. an accessory here or there. but i also like accessories from the boy outfit. and i can look at myself in the girl clothes and say huh. looks good. but it doesn’t look like me. neither of them are the clothes i was born in.
wearing girlhood is like wearing clothes over top other clothes. it can be fine. i can deal with it. but it’s not actually comfortable. and when i realized i can take it off and just wear the first layer that i’m MEANT to wear.... putting it back on keeps getting harder. i start to realize all of the things that have been silently poking and suffocating me. it gets harder and harder to keep wearing.
but i can do it. i can shut my mind off to it, and just ignore that i’m wearing them at all. pretend it’s not there. dont look down at the clothes. don’t think about them. and i can be fine.
there’s certain parts of them that have been stuck to my body... even under the clothes i was born in. they make the right clothes not fit (see: tits.) and i want them gone. i want to be in the right clothes. i want people to see me in the right clothes.
but i keep clinging to the girl clothes. i’ve grown up in them. i’ve gotten all the way here with them. i’m scared that i’ll regret putting them away.
and i think to add to the confusion, i find both the girl and boy clothes attractive, and the girl clothes even more attractive than the boys. so i tried to make my own reflect that. but i think i just find it attractive... it’s just not mine though.
but when i take them off and just wear the original clothes.... wow does it feel amazing. i never want to go back. from what i know of them right now, it seems that the original clothes have some patches from both the girl and boy clothes pinned on comfortably and happily. they are not quite the original garment, but they’re stitched on and i quite like them there, at least right now.
but i always have to put the girl clothes back on. and it’s just habit now, i even sleep in them, not matter if they’re uncomfortable. and there’s parts that i just can’t take off, even when i want to, and i’m afraid that if i do i’ll have made a mistake and end up regretting it (see again: tits). and i’m so afraid that i won’t even be able to get the option of removing them. i’m afraid that the girl clothes are actually uncomfortable enough for them to not be my real clothes. im scared i won’t be accepted in my real clothes. i’m just afraid.
i don’t quite think i know the name of the original clothes yet. they’re nonbinary, but their label i can’t quite read yet. i’ll keep trying though. i think i won’t know until i’m able to stop holding onto the girl clothes. i won’t let myself let go of them, even though i want to. i want to put them down and embrace whatever is truly there. but i’m scared of doing that, and so the girl clothes are all tangled up in the real clothes and i can’t really tell exactly what’s what, not yet. i want to. i really do. but i need to be patient and keep trying, and i need some support to help me untangle them, i think. and understand what’s actually causing me discomfort, and how much, and vice versa for happiness.
but most of the labels i’ve tried to apply to the real clothes don’t quite seem right. demigirl feels too close to girl, and i don’t think agender is right because i do have clothes! there’s not none there! and again... i can’t really tell where my girl clothes stop and my real clothes begin right now. the more often i take off the girl clothes tho...the less and less i see there, tangled up. i’m sure there’s a word out there for this! there’s so many words... i can’t imagine there not being one!
gah! this is kinda frustrating... but i think it’s a good metaphor. i hope it makes sense. im kinda tired but want to post it now...it’s not fully perfectly fleshed out and i don’t detail my entire gender experience of course, but this is just how i’m feeling right now. i feel like i keep learning more about myself and the last post i posted about it isn’t even right anymore!! but i’m just taking off the girl clothes more and starting to realize im wearing my own clothes underneath.
as always, i welcome any comments on this post. in fact, i want them!!!!!
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heymrstargazer · 3 years ago
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idk how but these numbers just came to me... crazy
(you can pick which ones you want to do)
14, 16, 127, 124, or 125
yeah crazy right :| im sure they just mAgiCaLly came to you
anywaY lmao 14:
nora and liam decide to get colin a beam for home. it goes in the basement (next to the room with the dentist chair in it that he pointedly avoids) and he's allowed to be excited about it for all of two seconds. gymnastics was the one thing he actually enjoyed until nora and liam turn it into training by essentially knocking him off of it over and over until he's in tears. they say it's to help him learn, and he has to listen if he wants to be a good person, and the more prepared he is for combat the better son he'll be, as well as many other bullshit excuses. he's bruised and bleeding in the places where noras ring caught his skin, and ends up spending the night in the basement with the door locked
16: colins just leaving an art show thing that ross left early to pick up his brother (who stays with them for a bit during the summer between semester). he parked around the back of the building and by then it's dark and nearly empty, so nobody sees two people hop out of a black suv with tinted windows and grab him. it's takes colin less than 30 seconds to realize who it is because they were always particularly cruel to him when they worked for his parents. they always wanted more than they deserved, and clearly weren't just in it for the money. the threats are typical and colin is unphased, even with the barrel of a gun pointed at the side of his head
they ask for money, of course, say nora and liam owed them more. colin, unsurprisingly, runs his mouth here and there, tells them they've gotten sloppy. it pisses them off, enough to get the knives out, but colin just thinks it's pathetic by then. they know exactly what kind of circumstances he was trained to get out of, and they thought kidnapping wasn't one? disappointing, honestly. he elbows one of them in the nose (perfectly placed for them to black out), and tackles the other out the door. they struggle a bit and colin ends up with two pretty nasty gashes in his waist and thigh, but by then someone has obviously seen them and called police
after that colins taken to the er. he had to get stitches and such, but a few things went wrong because he woke up during the procedure (the dosage was too low cause his tolerance is much higher than it should be) and essentially had the same amount of panic as he did when waking up during torture demonstrations. eventually things are okay and he wakes up to Ross glaring daggers at him because "remember how i told you dont die? and you said 'i think i can make it to the car by myself?' yeah how'd that work out for you." but everything ends up okay and they get arrested and whatever
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pinkykitten · 5 years ago
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Forest pt. 1
 Castlevania 
Alucard Tepes x female! reader
Warning: cursing, violence, gore, mentions of blood
Specifics: chapter fic, romance, angst, fluff, not requested, action, adventure, race neutral reader, human reader
People: alucard tepes, monster thingy from the show
Words: 3,338
Summary: Since Alucard lives in the forest now in Dracula’s castle he meets the reader in the forest and in that moment he starts to have a liking towards her and is very bashful, blushy and romantic towards her and she is a goofball and is very silly and lighthearted. From the moment that they met all Alucard wants to do is protect the reader no matter what is takes. 
Authors Note: god alucard is so sexy and so beautiful like god dang! lol sorry im a bit of a horny nerd. anywho its rlly late where im at andddddd i cant go to sleep cuz i slept the whole day so ayyyee. anywho i was inspired idk where but i was inspired to write this bc i think alucard deserves love and someone who adores him like i do. i loved writing this tho and rlly want to write for castlevania more but this is going to be chapters idk how many yet lets just see where the wind takes us i hate planning anyways. IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS THO I AINT EVEN MAD ABOUT IT!!!!! LIKE YASSSSSSSSSS
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“Alright so its been almost a month and I haven’t died. That must mean I’m doing something right.” You used a piece of wood you made into a cane to help you get up the steep hills. You were voyaging alone in the forest. You had a family that were settled more outside the town that you lived near. You were a large family and your siblings came down with a sickness. You were determined to find a cure and determined to find medicine for them. As scary as it may have seemed you needed to put on a brave face for the dangers that lay out ahead. You knew those monsters walked around and as much as that terrified you, your siblings came first. At a young age, adventure excited you and you always wanted to prove to yourself and family that you were more than capable of doing things alone. 
You saw a river down below. The water rushing past rocks made you relaxed and with a glint in your eyes you smiled. “Aha!” You looked left and right, seeing if anyone was present. “Alone with just the woods and me. I knew mother was wrong. I can very much so take care of myself.” You threw your satchel on the floor alongside with your clothes. “I smell like a pig.” You chuckled at your joke. The cool, clear water was down below as you ran to it, looking forward to the coldness and the feeling of being clean. You jumped in not knowing someone was near. 
You dunked your face laughing. “And there’s fish!” You swam behind a light blue fish. Being at awe when you saw the way the fins shone from the sun. You picked it up skillfully and carefully you set it free. Your body delicately floated. “This is the life.” Birds chirped, the wind blew like a whisper against your cheek. 
But suddenly, the rustle of the trees alarmed you. You heard the snapping of a twig. Your head snapped to the noise. Fear bubbled inside you as you thought of all the possibilities. What if it was a bear? What if it were those monsters? Your heart sped fast as you backed out of the river. Your breathing was faster. You needed to get out of here. As you got out your back hit against fur. You quickly turned around as saw a huge demon, monster, you didn’t even know what but you knew it was from Dracula’s army. Its teeth were sharp and its eyes were bright and red. It was your worst nightmare. You erupted a scream as you sprinted around it, climbing the hill to where your satchel laid. 
“Oh my God! Oh my God! I’m gonna die!” You didn’t care about your nudeness, all that mattered to you was surviving. You tried to go as fast as possible but the creature landed in front of you, stopping you from escaping. It cornered you against a huge boulder and tree. With everything you had you lifted your cane high in the air and hit the monster. It didn’t even flinch. 
“What?” Your eyes widened in horror. The creature picked you up as if you weighed nothing and threw you against a tree. You cried out in pain as your back burned and ached to an extreme level. You then noticed that a tree branch stabbed right through your shoulder. The blood dripped down your arm onto your naked skin. You felt queasy and weak. Thoughts and last words echoed through your mind. The monster was about to devour you but a flash of blonde hair came into your vision and you saw, him.
This young man was nothing you’ve ever seen before. He was stronger than the average person, throwing the monster back and forth. He punched it high in the air and then threw it against the boulder. He was incredible. Full of power. Your eyes were starting to close and your vision grew blurry as the last thing you saw were the fangs that the man displayed. 
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“Mother I had this terrible dream!” Your whole body shot up. That was a terrible decision as you winced in pain. “It was not a dream.” You breathed hard as you took in your surroundings. The fire was lit making the room comfortable as you were once shivering from being wet. It looked as if you were in the kitchen of somebody's house. “Hello?” Your throat was dry. You were in a stranger’s house. You were in a stranger’s house! “Oh dear.”  You were put high onto a table. You jumped off but were still too weak. You landed hard on your knees but caught yourself with your arms. Your shoulder pounding in pain. You became dizzy. You heard footsteps nearing. “Who are you?” You tried to stand up again but slipped into the arms of a man. 
“Hold on. You are still not well.” His voice came out almost like a whisper. He picked you up and sat you back on the table. “Also, I’m the man who saved your life.”
“That was you? That was, um, pretty amazing.” You curled into yourself. You were nervous around this man. He intimidated you and made you feel shy. He was very handsome and charming. “You kicked that things as* real good.”
The man chuckled, “thank you.”
You quickly looked at your nightgown. It was too big for you as the sleeves ate your arms and the collar was off the shoulders. Your eyes shot open. You were bashful. “Did you, um, see anything?”
He looked away, “I kinda had to. Sorry. You were naked when I saved you.”
“Great. That’s great,” you inhaled clapping your hands. Suddenly you sensed a throbbing pain on your shoulder and you looked to see a blood stain on the nightgown. “Um excuse me sir. Is that supposed to happen?”
The man looked worried as he laid you back down and pulled the nightgown down enough to see your shoulder. “It does not look good. It seems with that jump you reopened the stitches.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. God, this really hurts.”
He got to work on doing your stitches again as he got his items. “Bite down on this.” He opened his mouth to show the action and you saw his teeth. 
“Agh please don’t eat me! You’re a vampire aren’t you?” You flinched away. 
The man rolled his eyes as he shoved the cloth in your mouth but before he got started on you he said, “You are right. I am a vampire.”
You spat the cloth out, “I knew it. I also would like to know your name as this may be my last moment and I would like to remember who will either save me or take my life. My name is y/n l/n.”
“The names Alucard Tepes and this is going to sting a little.” With that Alucard poured some alcohol on your wounds. (im sorry i dont know how helping ppl w medical stuff works :( 
You shifted and tried pouncing up, fighting the urge to let out a blood curdling scream. But Alucard pushed you down with his hands, shushing you gently. “I know, this hurts.” You could almost sense some love and actual concern in his voice. His brows knitted, “I promise, you are almost finished.” 
You looked deep into Alucard’s eyes. They were the most beautiful eyes you have ever seen. This man or vampire looked unreal. He looked made up, something from stories you read as a child, like a prince. You felt something go off within you. Not knowing if it was lust or something else but a fire erupted inside your soul as Alucard’s face inched closer to yours to get to work on your shoulder. His smell was intoxicating. Almost like a musk but yet something floral, fresh, mixed in. Your heart thumped faster at the contact. 
His plump lips quivered as they looked at your state. No way did he want this innocent soul as beautiful as you looked dying on his table. He already had to deal with a lot recently. He didn’t know why or understand but he had this inclination, this feeling, that he needed to keep you alive. He just had to. 
Unable to keep the scream at bay no more you let it out. Your veins protruding from your neck as you became dizzy and once again passed out.
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Your eyes opened. Your body was aching. It felt like it went through war. You inhaled as you looked around again, but this time you were hoping things were not a dream as then Alucard would be fake. Remembering his name your head whipped to the side to see Alucard holding a wash cloth stained with blood. He was sound asleep. His head resting against his arm against the table. All the medical stuff was out and about as if he were still working on you. His back was arched at a odd position. 
“He must of fallen asleep while working on me,” you whispered to yourself. His hair sprayed out on his shoulders and table. Without a second thought you touched his hair lightly and you were shocked. It felt like silk upon your fingers! His golden eye lashes kissed his cheek as he snoozed so peacefully. You felt bad leaving him to worry for you and to be sleeping in an uncomfortable place. You felt you weren’t that deserving of such treatment.
You kicked your feet out and hopped off the table. Your feet pattered against the hard floor as you walked to Alucard. You snatched him a blanket you saw nearby and draped it over his tall, lean body. You smiled seeing how elegant and graceful he looked sleeping. 
You yawned, scratching your head as you looked upon the window and noticed it was raining. Surprisingly in this vampire but also a stranger’s house the rain seemed cozy and it made you feel at peace. It was dark in his house. The trees shook from the tiny wind and rain. 
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“I must leave but I should thank Alucard for helping me with my wound last night. I probably wouldn’t have last without him.” Your mind wondered back to what happened at the river. Yes, Dracula was gone according to what the towns people said but why was his army still about, his monsters? It didn’t make sense to you. But what did you know? You were just a weak human living in a mysterious world you didn’t want any part of. 
You pulled out a chair and got to writing a thank you letter to Alucard, pulling out a pen, ink and a piece of paper.
“Dear Alucard. No, too direct. How about, to a savior? Too high and mighty.” Finally you had written your letter but it sounded very awkward and you were too much of a p*ssy to give it to Alucard. “Ugh this is hopeless.” You crumpled up the paper, throwing it on the floor by the garbage. 
You thought and thought and thought until an idea popped in your mind. “I know,” you snapped. “I’ll make him breakfast. My mother always says a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” You crossed your fingers, “lets just hope this man likes human food instead of hearts and blood.” You gulped. 
You rolled your sleeves up, washed your hands and brought out the pots and pans and butter. “I’m going to make toast, eggs, bacon, beans and mushrooms.”
You spiced up the food and placed them in a skillet. The sizzle satisfying your ears. The sun started to peak through the clouds as the aroma wafted through the house. You grinned, loving to cook and make a person happy with your hard work. “I hope he likes this.” You were almost finished when Alucard coughed behind you. 
You jumped, being in the zone. “Oh hi there,” you waved awkwardly. “My apologies if I woke you.”
“Uh, no I woke myself up,” his rough voice made your knees weak as it was still laced with sleep. He stretched, cracking some knuckles, yawning as well. “What I would like to know is what are you doing?”
“Well,” you started setting up the table cutely. “I wanted to say thanks for helping me back there. I was kind of a p*ssy to be honest and like a wuss so this is just a little thanks for all the help.”
Alucard didn’t know what to say so instead he just smiled. 
“Please, sit, sit, sit,” you pointed to the seats. “Breakfast is almost ready.”
Alucard awkwardly sat. Not ever having this type of service. He looked at you as you were preparing the finishing steps of your dish. The sun cascaded around you and you were illuminated like a goddess. You were breathtaking. Alucard blushed madly. You put everything on the table. Seeing Alucard’s expression you laughed, “are you alright?”
Alucard coughed, “yes, thank you for all of this. You really didn’t need to. It all looks beautiful.” He looked at the presentation. 
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You took the seat beside Alucard. You could of sat anywhere else but you sat beside him. He almost couldn’t hear what you were about to say in that moment from how hard his heart was beating.  
“No need to thank me. I think we’ve done enough thanking and now its time to dig in.” You patted his hand. 
Alucard just looked at the food and he almost felt tears at his eyes. Nobody ever cared for him like this. 
“Is it okay? If its not to your liking I totally get it. You don’t have to eat it. I don’t even know if you like this stuff. I mean who knows maybe you only eat flowers and here I am serving you bacon and eggs.” You became flustered. 
“No, no, no this is lovely its just,” he choked back a cry. “Nobody has ever done anything like this for me, ever.”
You clutched onto his hand and gave him a beautiful smile. “Then that just means you have to eat double. As much and maybe more than what your stomach can hold.” You giggled.
Alucard blushed again as he started to eat quickly. Enjoying every moment of your company and food. “The beans are delicious.”
“Well I’m glad you liked them. Its my mum’s recipe, she always makes them like this.” You then recalled why you came on this journey in the first place. “My satchel!”
“Don’t worry, its safe.”
You raised your brow, “did you take a look?”
Alucard paused, “no, I would never.” He took a bite out of his bread. Chewing on the piece silently. “Maybe just a tiny peek.”
You pouted, “Nosy. I should of locked it.”
“Why do you have all those books in your bag anyways?” Alucard crossed his legs as he took a sip of his coffee. His light orbs staring intently at you. 
Seeing the rain start to become tiny droplets of rain you thought about your family and how you missed them. This was all for them. “My siblings you see are very ill,” your hand shook with anxiety. “My village is very poor and we are limited in resources, especially medicine. We’ve tried everything and nothing seems to work. They just seem to be getting worse. I’ve been researching and trying to find an answer and supposedly, I read that there is a certain flower that only grows in a specific area that may cure the illness. In the books there is a map and that’s why I was led to that river well more like I wanted to take a bath and that’s what led me to the river. But I’ve been on this trail for a while. I’m just, scared because it all depends on me. If I can’t find this flower, if I can’t find a cure and my family dies it will be my fault. I would have killed them.” You didn’t even realize it but you were crying. 
Alucard saw you were distressed and held onto your hand. He comforted you through your anxiety. Your teary eyes looked into his and he gave you a toothy smile, “I’ll help you find it.”
“What?” You rubbed your eyes.
“I know the place you need to go. I can guide you there. Besides the outside world is very dangerous for a beautiful girl such as yourself. I can see that this means a lot to you and I want to help.”
You dropped your fork and got out of your chair. “You mean it? You aren’t joking?”
Alucard chuckled, “I promise I am speaking truth.” Alucard flung his hand out to you. 
You quickly shook on it and shouted with enthusiasm, “deal!” You jumped up and down laughing as you hugged Alucard. “Thank you, thank you, thank you. Can we please leave immediately then?”
“We can leave today.”
You danced, “yes. I’ll go change and get my things.” You brought the empty dishes to clean them as Alucard stood up with a smile on his face. 
You were something else, something different. A breath of fresh air in his depressing life. Maybe you were meant to be here. Maybe you were a sign. Either way Alucard thought that these couple of days were to be very exciting. Alucard was about to get ready when a piece of paper in the corner caught his eyes. It was crumbled. “Hmmm, what is this?” He bent down to pick it up and read the words. With just the first word to the letter his smile grew bigger and bigger. 
Alucard coughed as he raised the letter you wrote to him earlier but discarded high in the air, “Dear Alucard, to my savior. I would love for you to know that I am extremely appreciative for what you have done for me in saving my life-”
Your eyes almost popped out of your head. That letter was not supposed to be read by him especially. It was embarrassing. You dropped a plate in the sink and felt your whole world collapse. You wanted to crawl in a hole and die. 
“When I first saw you I thought you were a prince-” Alucard kept going until you couldn’t take it any longer. 
You sprinted and tried grabbing the letter out of his hand. “Alucard, give that to me. Now.”
“Oh you want this letter?” Alucard smirked. “You do sound like an obnoxious romantic whore.”
You gasped, “I do not! That was supposed to be my thank you letter and I didn’t like it and you weren’t supposed to read it. So give it back!” You jumped for it but Alucard raised it high in the air. “Alucard, give it to me.”
Alucard’s face came closer to yours as he pinned you against the table. “Why don’t you come and get it?”
You practically climbed him, snatching the letter out of his hand. “Aha!” But Alucard’s footing was off and he and you fell with a thud. 
The birds chirped lightly as Alucard laid under you and you fell on top of him, your arm bracing for the impact. Alucard held in his breath with a red blush as he looked at you so extremely close. You both held that position for what felt like forever. You eyes were wide in horror at the compromising position. 
You quickly stood up and were flustered. Forgetting where everything was. “Um, um, um. I’m going to go put my trip on so we can get ready for the clothes.” You quickly ran away. 
Alucard breathed quickly as he brushed back his long hair whispering the words. “My savior.” He noticed you were in such a panic mode that you forgot about your letter. It was left and Alucard was not going to leave or throw away evidence that someone saw him in such a good light. He loved that letter because it was from you. 
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