#im not entirely in the right frame of mind rn so this might not make sense

[schrodingers-fool]

I appreciate your points agree with you on the national identity part, I am not a fan of nationalism for sure. The thing I'd push back on is the idea that those subcultures aren't inherently American. What makes them less American than, for example, bharatanatyam is Indian? Bharatanatyam is a classical south Indian dance form, many from North India would not know it, but even though it is a part of a specific subculture within India, it is still considered a part of Indian culture. That goes back to my questions in my tags, why do we let the worst of us define our narrative? Why is Black American culture not considered American culture? Why is Indigenous American culture not considered American culture? Why is our idea of American culture white Americans in American flag shirts buying guns and Walmarts and not a Mexican-American family in the Southwest having a huge potluck of fusion food, everyone making sure to make extra so that every guest can take something home? Why isn't it everything that came out of the ballroom scene in the 80s?

I feel like I need to especially emphasize black and indigenous people again because indigenous people are as American as you can get (using the popular framework of what a country is and what America is), why do we ignore them so much when it comes to what American culture is? And black people were brought here pretty much from the beginning of the colonization, how can we say that their culture isn't as American as white culture here?

I hate the idea that people are Proud To Be An American™️ in the sense of being proud of what our government has been doing and being proud of our history of colonialism. And I definitely do not like the propaganda surrounding the idea of the "melting pot" that tries to erase the violent history against immigrants and bipoc. However, we have to acknowledge that those same immigrants and bipoc and queer people that we are trying to protect are Americans, and the culture they cultivate is American culture.

if you identify at all with 'american culture' or 'american national identity' you are a MARK

[comicsnas]

showtime

WARNING: eye gore!!, violence Disclaimer: this is..... an au where guy fieri isnt a cool and chill dude that just likes food. i am very sorry for what i do to him in this. i dont mean it and if the cops knock at my door i will blame it on hussie word count: about 3.7k. i am so sorry

context john gets kidnapped by his mom dave doesnt panic

Los Angeles, CA, Wednesday

“No matter what happens, nobody cancels the premiere,” you say. “Okay? No matter what’s in the news. No matter how bad it gets. The movie drops on Thursday, and people are gonna watch it. Got it? This is a scare tactic and we’re not falling for it. Even if the world is ending, we are premiering this movie and going through with the promo. With or without me.”

Catalena, your manager, has been with you for too long to think that you’re joking. She was who flew you in from Houston to LA back when you were twenty, who let you sleep on your couch until you made enough money to get an apartment, who thought that the message you had for the world was one worthy of her help. She knows that all of this is real, and that she can’t stop you.

Her face says, Dave, you’re scaring me. Her mouth says, “You got it. Could you at least tell me… what you think is going to be in the news that would make us not premiere it?”

“Something bad,” you say. “Hopefully, anyway.”

She tilts her head. “Are you faking your death?”

“Lalonde and I are gonna disappear for a sec,” you say. “How people interpret that is gonna be up to them.”

“Not like you to leave things up to chance,” Catalena says. “Some will think it’s elaborate PR.”

“That’s why I’m only telling you. Lalonde and I are gonna frame this to look serious, and no one else is gonna know what’s going on. You keep your cool, but don’t let anyone know that you’re in on it.”

“I mean, I barely am.” She gives you a Look, a capital L Look, then sighs and nods. “Fine. So if I hear about your presumed death tomorrow, I won’t freak out. At what point am I allowed to assume you are actually dead, and freak out a little bit?”

“If you don’t hear from me in a week,” you say, “then Lalonde and I have been killed by Betty Crocker.”

Houston, TX, twelve years ago

You’re blind.

That’s not true. You’re not blind. You don’t think you are going to be blind. There is no way that you’re fully blind, because the assassin only got your right eye, so it doesn’t make sense for you to be blind, but you’re blind.

The pain might originate from your right eye, but it’s engulfing your entire head by now, and there is something sticky in your left eye and you can’t open it anymore and it burns, and you’re going to go blind, and then you’re going to die in a ditch, in a pool of your own blood, and this is it. It’s over. You and your half sister fucked around on the internet a bunch, got really deep into some conspiracy theories, and barely two weeks after you made the discovery that Betty Crocker definitely, undoubtedly, literally is an actual alien, someone was sent to kill you.

They didn’t manage, so far. They got your eye, and they broke your glasses, leaving a cut on your nose, and a bunch of cuts everywhere else, and you think you cracked your head open when you fell. But you cut their knife hand off, good and clean off, watched it fall to the ground right in front of you. By the time it hit the pavement, the assassin had already turned around and ran away, leaving you to crumple and suffer here by yourself.

This is it.

“Strider?” Rose says. Before the blood trickling into your good eye ruined your vision, you managed to dial her number and call her up, and now you’re lying on your side with your phone pressed to your ear, imagining her in her college dorm room in New York. You were going to visit her there, years ago, after you ran away from your parents. It never worked out. Neither of you has the money. You really wish you could have seen her at least once.

“Yeah,” you croak. “You at home?”

“At the dorm, yes. What’s going on?”

“You gotta go. She sent someone after me, she’s gonna come for you too. If she knows that I know, she’ll know that you know.”

One of the most comfortable parts of friendship with Rose, you’ve found, is that she never asks you to clarify what the fuck you’re talking about. Either she just lets you ramble, or she knows exactly what you mean. “Shit,” she hisses, and you can hear rustling on her side of the line, hopefully from her getting ready. She probably has a getaway bag somewhere, you think. You have one, but not on you right now. It’s too late for that.

“They’ve already hit me, so whoever she sent to you can’t be far,” you say. You try to blink your eye open, but then it hurts the other more, and it burns. You can’t even tell where exactly. It just burns. “Hurry up, Lalonde.”

“They’ve hit you?” she echoes, still rustling, breathing into the phone. On the move. Good. “Are you okay?”

“No,” you say. “Gonna call an ambulance after this. Just get the fuck out and text me later, yeah?”

Rose pauses. You can hear her pause, you can hear everything go very silent for a second. She says, “You called me before you called for help?”

“Yeah,” you say. She told you, once, that there is a quick and easy way out the window of her second-storey dorm room, that lets her balance over to her girlfriend’s room only a few windows ahead. She can’t hide there, it’s too close, but it’s a start. She’ll figure it out, she always will. She was the first person to ever have your back. “Of course I did.”

On a plane, Thursday morning

“What’s on your mind?” Rose asks.

You’re leaned back, staring out the window, listening to the clicking of her knitting needles next to you. The pilot here doesn’t know who he’s dealing with, just that he is flying two rich people and their car to Washington, DC. Your Mustang is in the cargo part of the plane, a vital part of the plan. You’ll torch it later. It was the first car you bought with your own money, after SBaHJ had become big and you had finally paid off your hospital debt.

Rose’s apartment isn’t that old, she got it after Roxy was born and she decided to move to Los Angeles, so you could help each other babysit. Trashing it still felt wrong. A home is a home, but you wanted it to look broken into, to make sure that people put two and two together. This isn’t a Dave Strider marketing scheme, you both got hit. After all the work that you’ve done, at least some of the public should understand what that means.

“Us,” you say.

“That’s very sentimental,” she says. “Are you sure you aren’t mourning your car again?”

“Shut up,” you say, and blindly swat at her, hitting her elbow. She hits you back, hand slapping your shoulder. “It’s a good car.”

Rose hums. When you look at her, she’s already back to knitting. You have no idea what she’s making, but it looks like a onesie for an octopus. “We will be fine,” she says. “We have to.”

You nod, and go back to staring out the window, thinking about what Alma said. “It’s just,” you say quietly. “We gotta start thinking about the endgame, here, don’t we.”

“Start?” Rose echoes. “Dave, we know the endgame to this. We’ve known for a while. The second you landed in the hospital with a cut inside your eyeball, you and I both knew that this would end in death.”

You don’t say anything. She’s right, of course she is. You knew then, and she knew, as soon as you texted her from your hospital bed, and she texted you back from a Greyhound bus. And you tried to forget, you both did, for a very long time. You almost managed, for a whole decade, until last year, someone made you scared and angry enough to ram a sword through his throat. Until Rose came and disassembled the body on your rooftop, and then helped you burn it. Reality has caught up with you, and someone is going to die.

The clicking of her needles has stopped again. You turn your head to look at her, and she’s looking back at you, and her face seems younger than it should be. She is just as scared as you are. Neither of you ever wanted it to go this far. Neither of you wanted to kill.

“I don’t like it either,” Rose says. “But someone is going to wind up dead, and it sure as shit isn’t gonna be us.”

Washington, DC, now

)(IC: u comin or what TG: yeah about that

You’re on the hood of your car. The children -- and Sally, John’s pet hedgehog -- are with the one sitter you still trust. Rose is in position, which means she is at a remote location outside the city holding Guy Fieri hostage. She has sent you a picture of him tied to a chair and gagged, which means that it’s go time.

All according to plan.

TG: how about you come kill me somewhere else instead of home sweet home )(IC: why would i do that TG: dying mans last request? )(IC: stfu lol this is so obviously a trap TG: wow ok so is yours )(IC: fair TG: just thought that you know TG: john means something to both of us and dont try to tell me no because i know he does TG: so like can we maybe duke it out somewhere where i wont accidentally blow him to smithereens TG: innuendo intended )(IC: UG)( )(IC: gross TG: lmao TG: anyway bethany you know me and you know im comin with c4 in my backpack if im comin TG: do you really want that around your son or can you just get off your ass and meet me here so john stays safe )(IC: u reely think ya have a fighting chance to even get that far )(IC: buoy you set one foot in my house and ya get spearfished TG: yeah not really making a great point for me to come there rn TG: just thought maybe youd wanna be with your guy guy )(IC: who TG: you know TG: guy the guy )(IC: tf

You text her the picture that Rose sent, just Guy Fieri looking miserable, no indication of whether or not you or Rose are with him.

)(IC: )(-EY )(IC: motherglubber what do u think yoar doin TG: yoar??? TG: thats literally not a word. wym you oar?? what TG: anyway im gonna dismember this asshole if you dont agree to keep john safe and come here and im gonna start with the frosted tips )(IC: FIN--E )(IC: cant effin wait to be done with you )(IC: ill come krill ya if its so shrimportant just gimme the location TG: ok shrimportant is actually pretty funny TG: [coordinates] TG: see you soon

She drives a fuchsia Jaguar that looks like Xzibit threw up all over it, because of course she does. You watch it leave from your perch on your Mustang, then slide off the hood. shes gone, you text Rose. get ready to bounce

Before you leave, you turn back toward you car, and gently pat the roof. “See you soon,” you repeat, “for one last ride.”

Look, it’s a good car, alright.

Later on in the plan, once you’ve convinced John to come with you, and Rose has joined you in the no doubt brutal course out of the house littered with security guards, the three of you will pack into this car, and you will drive. You will be tailed, you know you will. Rose and you estimate two to three SUVs with more security personnel that will follow you, and sooner or later, you won’t stand a chance against them.

So, you’ll call the cops. You don’t usually do this -- even during all these years, neither you nor Crocker ever called the police on each other, and technically, you still won’t, today. You will just anonymously call authorities, and tell them about a burning car by the side of the road. Then you will hang up, and you and Rose and John will hop out of a moving vehicle as you crash your beloved Mustang and have it go up in flames. Authorities will come and find Dave Strider’s infamous car, and hopefully that’ll get people talking.

Crocker’s guys will hopefully exit their cars and go looking for you, or at least for John. It’s an easy con from there -- while they look, you will steal their SUVs and drive off toward your safehouses. Simple. No sweat.

“This better work,” you mutter to yourself, then leave your car behind and start climbing the fence around Crocker manor.

You’ve been here once before, while she was out and John was showing you around. You weren’t actively trying to case the place back then, just spending time with your boyfriend and checking out where he grew up, but you couldn’t help how curious you were. You still remember the most important spots, and you did your best to paint a proper picture of them to Rose (you drew a map in MS Paint), so now you have a pretty good idea of where you need to go.

The guard posts, of course, are randomized. You’ll have to take these as they come, and you feel prepared enough, with just your sword and a handful of knives. You’re wearing the kevlar you wore to the Oscars. You’re gonna be fine.

It’s a race against time now, knowing that there is no guarantee when Crocker will be catching on and returning to her house, and knowing that you stand no chance actually fighting her face to face. You climbed in toward the side of the house, because it’s the shortest distance between fence and wall. The front and back yards are ridiculously huge and opulent, and while you would have plenty of gaudy statues to hide behind, you’re not looking to make your way through there.

The first guard spots you right as you hop down off the fence, and your knife is in his shoulder before he even finishes drawing his gun on you. He’s also wearing a vest, but those don’t stop blades, and you take offense in knowing that she made them dress up like that. As if either you or Rose were going to show up with guns. She really doesn’t know you at all. You knock out the guard with a hit of the knife grip against his temple. Maybe you can get through this without deaths.

One of them you comfortably take out from behind a useless fountain placed in this part of the garden for some reason, appreciating how quiet and low-key you can be about it so far. The bigger the ruckus, the sooner she’ll return, so having them all go down in silence is your best case scenario.

It’s the third guard that ruins your track record. You’re almost at the house wall, and you know you’re under the right window, which means all you have to do is scale it and climb right into John’s room, but for that to work you need to have a clean path behind you. Which you don’t, you realize the second a bullet hits your back.

Your vest catches it, but the momentum still knocks you down, and you scrape both of your palms open on the weird break between lawn and pavement. You hate this fucking garden. Who lives like this? You’re gasping for breath and trying not to inhale any grass, dealing with the reality that this is the first time someone has shot at you and actually hit you, and the bullet might not have penetrated skin at all, but Jesus Fucking Christ it still feels awful. Like someone kicked you in the spine, only with a bullet instead of a foot.

Onward. You hear footsteps behind you, and now it’s your turn to kick, hitting them in the face with your boot in the same motion that you’re pushing yourself up from the ground. As they curse and stumble, you draw your sword, but they catch their footing quickly, and you know you only have a split second to act. That gun is pointing at you, again, or still, and they’re going for your head this time, and if you don’t fight now, the journey ends for you here. Someone is going to die, and it sure as shit can’t be you. Your arm darts forward.

The sword goes through their vest, their ribs, and their heart -- you wouldn’t call it smoothly, you really wouldn’t. You can feel resistance with every inch, you feel it right up to your shoulder, and you hate it, and it makes you want to throw up, but you can’t, now. You shove them off your blade and watch them crumple to the ground, and turn right back toward the wall. They are not getting up again. That’s on you, and you can deal with that later. You have to get moving.

Your phone vibrates.

You manage to pull yourself up on a balcony and crouch there, hiding from whatever is going on in the yard now. Other guards must have heard the shot being fired, so you really need to get the fuck out of sight, but this has to do, for now. If Crocker is messaging you, you have to respond, so she doesn’t think you’re in her goddamn garden.

)(IC: yo )(IC: send me proof yoar still with him )(IC: almost there this betta be worth it TG: one sec

As expected. All according to plan, so far. You hope the blood on your sword won’t make the sheath sticky. You’ll have to clean it, later. You don’t want to.

TG: shes asking for proof TG: go ahead. sorry TT: No worries. TT: I know we don’t endorse violence, but honestly, Dawon, after being in a room with him for this long, I am quite happy to do this.

She sends you a picture, and you grimace at your phone. It takes a lot to make you grimace, as a Strider born and raised -- at the same time, you’re not easily shocked or grossed out, but this isn’t great to look at. Fieri’s eye has been pulled from its socket, dangling down his cheek suspended from the nerve, a hole in the eyeball. You hope Crocker won’t be able to tell that this was done with a knitting needle, and forward the photo to her.

TG: hows this )(IC: )(--EY FUCK OFF )(IC: stop i reely like guy 38( TG: yeah well i really like john TG: eye for an eye TG: hurry it up im waiting and theres a second eye to gauge out )(IC: ten minutes )(IC: ur gonna be so sorry buoy

TG: 10 mins TT: On my way.

Okay. Crocker is on her way to a location where there will only be Guy Fieri and a set of elaborate boobytraps which you know won’t kill her, but hopefully slow her down. Rose is on her way here, to help you and John get out of here. That’s plenty of time you still have. Things are going suspiciously well, you think, before you remember the ache in your back and the fact that you killed someone.

You have to get to John.

He’s another two floors up, but you are right in front of a balcony door. For a second, you wonder if you could get into the house from here and do the rest from inside, so you don’t present yourself to the mob of people with guns in the garden. Unfortunately, before you can do that, another person with a gun appears on the other side of that door, mouths an angry what the fuck at you, and draws an assault rifle. Alright, well.

The thing that has mostly kept you from becoming too violent in the past is the fact that you’re fast, and you’re a great climber, so when you hop backward onto the banister of the balcony and pull yourself up to the next one above you, it happens so fast that nobody in the garden reacts. It’s after you’re already crouching behind the balcony, thankfully made of robust concrete, that the shots start hitting it. You do nothing, count the bullets, wait for them to get rid of half of their magazines down there. Then you pull a knife, peek over the balcony, and throw it right into someone’s bicep.

More shots. More ducking and counting. You have two more knives to throw, and you do, rinse and repeat. The people down there are very angry with you now, and very much still able to shoot, but you figure at least their aim will be off, and they’ll be slower. You hope. You haven’t held a gun yourself in fucking forever.

You take a breath, and jump up to grab the balcony you know belongs to John.

As soon as you’re in the open, another bullet hits your back, further toward your side this time, and you almost let go. You let out an undignified noise instead, and hold on harder, focusing all you have into your arms to pull yourself up. Shots are ringing in your ears, and one hits the concrete right next to your head at almost the same time that another one grazes your leg. You hiss in pain, grunt in exertion, pull, pull, and roll yourself onto John’s balcony.

Someone in the garden yells, “Motherfucker!”

You sit, curled up, and pull apart the tear in your pants with your aching fingers to check the wound. It’s not deep, certainly not as bad as the chunk of missing flesh you have in your arm from being shot at last year. It’s fine. You’ll forget about it in a second, when your newest problem will be telling your amnesiac boyfriend that he needs to come with you.

You pull yourself up into a crouch, not more. You don’t want to risk getting shot in the head as you finally face him, so you just do it like this. Hunkered down, disheveled and bloody, you lean forward and knock on John’s window.

[fleurriee]

IM SORRY??? u were nervous about me reading this??? babe, ur writing is perfect & if you’re telling me it only gets better then my excitement is through the roof rn.

reader keeping her father’s dog tag but not specifying 👀👀 my mind is working overtime. if im overthinking this just ignore me lol but WHO KNOWS??

It will prevail because of you. Because you will carry it along and share it. You will revel in the beauty and fight to bring it back because what better way is there to live?

STOP IT HOW AM I CRYING ALREADY?? this is so beautiful & the fact that her mother was close with the KIDS TOO. evil.

the way u right the scientific stuff too has me thinking you have a big brain. idk what you do or if you’re just researching this but either way you’re smart & it makes you all the more attractive 😘

Your brother, for all intents and purposes, your partner-in-crime for all time. He loved you, too, you knew that, and you thought in a different life, in a different universe, you were soulmates, braving life’s tough storms together. 

lo’ak you beautiful boy u own my entire fucking heart.

HIM CALLING THE READER ANGEL TOO???

the reader singing willow 😫 such a beautiful song, god i love miss taylor swift

It’s not like you fought some animal in the wild, you never got out.

yeah alright neteyam, we can’t all be might warriors u big baby

His gaze shifted back to your frame, and with a sigh, he made his way out of the lab and your life, once more. 

neteyam baby, i will always love u but istg your reasonings better be good for abandoning her.

THIS WAS SUCH A GOOD START & IT HAS ME SO EXCITED TO CARRY ON READING!! the fact that i know this is like 200k too altogether?? man i cannot wait to see what you have in store for this. trust me, u will be seeing me again vvvv soon 😚😚😚

Illicit Affairs | Chapter I: Willow

Pairing: Neteyam x f!Human!Reader

Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of death and disease

Word count: 3,4k words

A/N: Sooo.. I kinda did something. This is the first fanfic I have written that will actually see the light of day, and also the first piece of writing (outside of master's dissertations, papers, scientific essays etc) that I have done since probably high school, which is longer ago than I'd like to admit. Anyway, I have been hyperfixated on Avatar recently, ATWOW fully bringing back my love and obsession for Pandora that I have had since 2009. I adore the new movie and the Sully kids, but I have a special place in my heart for Neteyam, so here we go. Let me know what you guys think. I work full time as a PhD student, so I'll try my best to write in my spare time and hopefully I can get this done the way I truly want to. This story is also loosely inspired by the incredible @forever--darling and her "One of Us" Neteyam fanfic, which I adore and have probably memorised by now with the amount of times I have read it.

“Wake up, Ace. It’s late already and there’s so much to do today, remember?” Norm’s voice pulled you out of a beautiful dream, one where you were flying on your chosen Ikran, high above the clouds, the worries…this lab. Albeit hard to swallow, you were almost relieved to be woken up, as feeding out-of-reach fantasies and dreams could lead to no good, anyhow. 

“I’m up… Jesus, Norm.” You felt yourself rise from your warm and comfortable bed and the feeling of your bare feet touching the cold, hard floor of the living quarters of the lab made you swallow a curse. 

“We left you some breakfast, get ready and meet us in the lab in 30, okay? We have the samples ready for you and you can run them after we’ve talked it through.” 

“Aye, aye, captain.” 

This was your life. You, among a few other people, were one of the only humans left on Pandora after the war took them back to Earth more than 17 years ago. Unlike the others, though, you were born here, on this foreign planet, the only home you’ve ever known. There was one more, a beautiful, feisty young man with a dark heritage, who liked to think that he is as much Pandoran as the actual natives. His name was Spider, and although you grew up together, there was not much you could say you had in common. He was wild and adventurous, has been his whole life; fully willing to immerse himself in the Na’vi ways and almost demanding a place amongst the people.

Although you have your doubts, he says the people were accepting of him, as he managed to befriend the most important family of the nearby Omatikaya tribe: the Sullys. Jake Sully, a former dream walker, rose to prominence as Toruk Makto, rider of Last Shadow. He brought multiple clans together to defeat the Sky People in their brutal quest for wealth and colonisation. He succeeded, after which he became Olo’yektan, leader of the Omatikaya. He is now fully Na’vi, after completing a consciousness transfer that allowed him to leave behind his human form and forever live as one of the people. It had never been done before. Jake was a great man, who became a mediator between the Na’vi and the humans left on Earth. His children, Neteyam, Lo’ak, Kiri and Tuk, were brought up to know English and be accepting of everyone, regardless where they came from, as long as they had pure intentions and a strong heart. Spider was considered one of them. And, surprisingly, you were, too. 

Your mum was a medic and researcher, brought here many moons ago to assist the Dr. Grace Augustin and her team in their quest to understand Pandora and its miraculous biology. Your dad, a former Master Sergeant in the US Air Force, joined the RDA for their military purposes. You never met your dad. He died when the Sky People attacked, although no one knows for sure which side he ended up taking. Your mum didn’t even know she was pregnant with you at the time, that’s how new everything was. Your mum loved your dad and she maintained her belief that he ended up doing the right thing in the end. You believed that as a child, but now are not so sure. Nevertheless, you still kept his dog tag, in a drawer at the bottom of your desk, a reminder of where you come from and what mistakes not to repeat. 

Your mum died where you were 10. It was the worst day of your life. The cancer, which slowly spread in the beginning, overtook her being one faithful day, which you will never be able to erase from your memory. There is no chemotherapy, no radiation therapy, no drugs that could have prevented this, not here, not on Pandora. Your mum made a decision to remain on this planet she loved more than her own and it eventually killed her. She had no regrets, she said. She was happy to have lived and loved and died here, among Eywa. The Na’vi loved her. She was good friends and a mentor to Neytiri and Jake, both of whom agreed to give her a Na’vi send off. You were there that day, one of the few times you had visited the Home Tree. You remember the pouring rain, falling so hard it washed away the tears spilling from your eye almost as soon as they emerged. You remember Lo’ak and Kiri, your beautiful friends that have always been there for you, mourning with you. Your mum was their favourite aunt. She introduced them to music and films, and showed all of you her favourite books and painters and made sure you all understood that humans, despite their many flaws, have beauty and love and good in them, that no matter what, will prevail. “It will prevail because of you. Because you will carry it along and share it. You will revel in the beauty and fight to bring it back because what better way is there to live?”

You finished breakfast quickly, some dry toast with some fruit Kiri brought you the last time she visited and made your way back to the lab. You found Norm and Max, alongside two other human scientists, Tim and Claire, sitting on chairs next to the lab benches, discussing plans for the week. 

“There she is, the brightest of us all.” You smirked at the compliment, raising your eyebrows in amusement and sitting down next to Claire. 

“You’ve done great work last week, Ace The ELISAs show promise that Relensa might have some effect against this type of Pandora virus. I need you to now repeat it with the samples we’ve provided and also include a different type of positive control to the experiment, if possible.”

“Will do. How about a combination therapy? I know Relensa is not the only type of anti-viral therapy we have available. Amantidin, maybe? We have to go at this from all angles, you know?” 

“Our Amantidin reserve is running severely short, but give it a try. Try a dose-response? Maybe 100 nano molars to 1 micro molar? Try 1milimolar as a positive control?”

This was your life. Unlike Spider, you avoided the clan. You did not want to be the walking reminder of everything they’ve lost. You were happy to sit back and dedicate your life to helping from the shadows. Your mum was a medic and a researcher, one of the brightest in the world. She wrote the book on Na’vi anatomy and physiology, she wanted to understand the people and hopefully help them mitigate losses brought by disease. You continued that work. Although young, you learned everything there was to learn. Not like you had anything else to do. You worked as a scientist and a nurse and a doctor if needs be. You patched humans up, stitched their wounds, ran experiments on Pandora pathogens and tried to find a cure against viral and bacterial diseases that plagued the Na’vi. You spent your life in the lab, and in the adjacent hub, learning, working out and playing the guitar and piano your mum taught you when you were really young. You couldn’t say you loved it, loved being here all the time, but you were content knowing you were, in your own way, making up for your species’ past mistakes. 

Around lunchtime, you heard commotion from the entryway. A very familiar voice reverberated through the hallways. Your lips raised in a soft smile. Lo’ak. 

Removing your lab coat, goggles and gloves, you made your way towards the origin of the sound. The tall, much-taller-than-you young man picked up a breathing mask from the designated shelf and waved at you with unwavering enthusiasm. You loved this boy. Your brother, for all intents and purposes, your partner-in-crime for all time. He loved you, too, you knew that, and you thought in a different life, in a different universe, you were soulmates, braving life’s tough storms together. 

“Brought you lunch, angel.” Your nickname for you made you roll your eyes. You hated it, but the more you hated it, the more he used it so you remained silent. “I thought you could use a break from the stale excuse you guys call food around here.” 

Lo’ak spoke English with you most of the time. He took to your parents’ (and his dad’s) culture the most out of all the kids. You spent a lot of your childhood together, hunched around a computer with old reruns of shows your mum loved in her youth, shows and movies that were way before even her time. She said she loved seeing what Earth looked like before humans killed their mother. Shows like Gilmore Girls, Friends and Modern Family were some of her favourites. You devoured them as a child, and Lo’ak did so too, with you. You drove her crazy as children, and drove Norm and Max crazy as teenagers, both trying to understand references and sayings, buildings and activities, games and idiosyncrasies. The Earth you grew up watching and reading up was beautiful, a star in the night sky you will never be able to touch. 

Lo’ak made his way to the dining room of the hub, and lay several carefully-packed items on the table. Fresh teylu, cooked over fire and Pandora vegetables, all full of colour and flavour, all much better than anything that could come out of this place. You realise that you are starving as soon as you lay your eyes on them. Before you even sat down, you dug your fingers in and quickly ate some teylu, groaning at the delicious sweet meaty flavour. It was your favourite, and Lo’ak knew. He laughed at your apparent desperation and motioned for you to sit down. You obliged, and you both sat in silence for a while, just enjoying each other’s company and the food he provided. 

“How’s training going? I haven’t seen you in a few days.” 

“I die a little bit inside every time you make me remember I spend my days training like a little robot. It’s going fine. Tiring, you know? My dad is fully back in his Marine ways. He knows it’s been enough time that the humans are bound to return sooner or later. He says they’d never leave this world, and all its untapped riches alone without a fight. So it’s a lot of military training… if we walk like them, talk like them and fight like them, it might bring us some sort of advantage, you know?” 

“Yeah, I know. I know it’s a pain, but he’s only doing this to protect you guys. He’s right. The humans are bound to return one day and when they do, we have to be prepared.” He doesn’t know this, but you have also been training, learning about guns, going through your dad’s old manuals and whatever else the RDA has left behind that could possibly be of use. You use the guns that are in the hub to learn how to aim, shoot, strip field, reload and clean the weapons, so you too can be prepared when the time comes. You might be stuck in a weak human body, but you will not be weak. 

“Neteyam’s driving me nuts. He used to be fun, remember that? He’s such a killjoy, it’s hard to stomach being around him anymore. He’s always giving out orders, always making sure everything is in order and perfect, like him. He’s been training like crazy, and sticking to my dad like he’s some sort of fungus you can’t get rid of. Drives me crazy.”

“Hey, don’t talk about your brother like that. There’s a line, Lo’ak. Neteyam only wants the best for you guys, and he’s the oldest. He has to carry the burden of being the responsible one while you guy cause mischief all the time.” 

Neteyam, Jake and Neytiri’s oldest, is more Na’vi than all the other children combined, in both looks and personality. Whilst the two middle children, Lo’ak and Kiri have five fingers, eyebrows and a more human appearance, Neteyam is all Neytiri. He’s tall and lean and seems like he was born with a bow in hand. A true warrior, you always found him a tad intimidating. Just like his mum, he has his apprehensions about humans and avatars, and although he used to come to the hub quite often when he was younger, mostly to keep an eye on his siblings, the visits have become a rarity as of recent times. 

You wonder how the young man changed in the time you haven’t seen him. You used to be close as children, or at least that’s what you thought. Whereas Spider took to Lo’ak and Kiri, their mischievous personalities a good match for each other, you took to the oldest Sully boy. He was quiet and thoughtful, and he used to look at you like a puzzle he was trying to solve, but couldn’t. He used to sit in the back as you used to play piano, and his gaze on you used to make your skin blush and your heart race. You tried not to think about the pang of hurt that rose in your chest as you remembered that he essentially abandoned you, without so much as a farewell. 

“Earth to Y/N, are you still there?” Lo’ak interrupted your train of thought and you were half grateful that you didn’t have to think about Neteyam anymore. 

“Sorry. You were saying?”

“I was saying you’re right, I know I should be more understanding, I am happy I don’t have to be the one to carry all of responsibility, but it’s hard not to hold a grudge when it seems my brother was abducted by aliens and replaced with a weird, no-fun replica of himself.” 

You groaned at the young Sully’s ongoing verbal attacks, but said no more. Whatever was going on between the two Sully boys was, at the end of the day, none of your business. 

“Anyway…” Lo’ak started, a mischievous grin appearing on his beautiful face, “I know something you don’t.” 

“Mmm, what is that?”

“I’m not telling you, but let’s just say I think it will make you very happy.” 

“Well that’s just cruel. You know I hate surprises.”

After lunch, Lo’ak joined you in the recreation hub, where you kept a guitar and the piano that the humans left behind. You didn’t feel like going back to work just yet. You sat down on the cold floor and picked up your copy of Pride and Prejudice, your mum’s favourite book. The book was coming apart at the seams, worn down from all the times you have held it in your hands, as if gripping it tighter would bring her back to you, even if for only a split second. You sighed as you passed the book to Lo’ak and motioned for him to put it on the table next to him.

“Sing for me, will you? I missed hearing your voice.” 

You smiled up at him. Nobody knew you like Lo’ak did. Nobody accepted you the way Lo’ak did. Both of you felt out of place in this world, like you didn’t quite belong anywhere. He has spent many an hour confessing how alone he’s felt all his life. You’d like to think you helped. You picked up your guitar and played a familiar song, one you knew he loved.

“Life was a willow and it bent right to your wind , as if you were a mythical thing

Like you were a trophy or a champion ring, and there was one prize I'd cheat to win

The more that you say, the less I know

Wherever you stray, I follow

I'm begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans

That's my man”

You sat like this for hours, laughing and playing and singing. You tried to teach him a couple of chords on the guitar, which looked puny in his massive hands. With a loud thud, the open to the recreation centre swung open, making both of your heads turn in shock. 

“Lo’ak, what the fuck?” 

The harsh tone came from a man, a man you barely recognised anymore. Tall and muscular, he was not the same Neteyam you last saw. He was adorning a carefully crafted neck piece that matched his hunter’s chest piece and the knife holder he kept by his hips. You took a second to adjust to the man in front of you, that you haven’t seen in so long, that will always have a special place in your heart. Your gaze eventually fell on his face, which, like the rest of him, matured so much in all that time apart. He was beautiful. His hair was freshly braided and you couldn’t help but stare at the beaded strands that framed his face. As much as his body and face changed, they didn’t hold a candle to his eyes. The big yellow orbs that always looked at you curiously and intently were now focused on Lo’ak with rage flashed across them. 

“You were supposed to meet me at the Home Tree a fucking hour ago, Lo’ak. Dad asked you to join the hunting party and pull your weight for once, remember that? Are you physically unable to do anything that is ever asked of you?” 

He is yet to even spare a glance in your direction. You felt your blood pressure rising at the oldest Sully, but you pushed it down to look at Lo’ak, who was staring daggers at his older brother. As he was opening his mouth to undoubtedly say something that would get him in even more trouble than he was already in, you cut him off. 

“It’s my fault.” You say in Na’vi. You doubted Neteyam was in the mood for English, so as to not escalate the tensions further, you opted for your semi-decent Na’vi. “I needed his help with some samples Norm got for me that I couldn’t identify. I’m done now, though. Sorry for taking him from his duties.”

His eyes finally snapped from Lo’ak and laded on your frame. You saw his lips parting in confusion and then settle in a firm line. His eyes scanned your body from head to toe. You changed. A lot. Your hair was now close to reaching your narrow waist, which he hated himself for noticing. You were wearing what the humans called a “top”, that was cut above your abdomen and had the word “Stanford” written across it. He’s sure he’s seen it before, although he couldn’t place where. You were wearing bottoms, short and blue, with cuts in them, which Neteyam didn’t get. Why are your clothes ripped? It’s not like you fought some animal in the wild, you never got out. He couldn’t help noticing how lean you had become, so lean, in fact, he could trace your muscles with precision, something he is rarely able to do with humans. Your species was puny and weak, which is why they needed avatars and exo-suits to survive on Pandora. Realizing he was staring, his eyes moved from you back to Lo’ak, and motioned for him to get up. Although he huffed and puffed, Lo’ak obliged without saying a word. He turned around before exiting the room, giving you one last exasperated look. You winked at him and clicked your tongue in the direction of the forest, a small smile on your face. This skxawng. 

“Hey, you.” You called after Neteyam in English, as soon as Lo’ak disappeared from your line of view. You don’t know what you expected, but you had to try. He turned around and his eyes met yours. It was like looking at a stranger. 

“I really have to go, Y/N.” He said, with a deep voice and slight accent, and his eyes fell on the floor as soon as he noticed the look of hurt that crossed your face. 

“Fine, go.” You said, quickly composing yourself. You refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing he can hurt your feelings. You turned around, and busied yourself cleaning up, not sparing a second look in his direction. His gaze shifted back to your frame, and with a sigh, he made his way out of the lab and your life, once more. 

[naernon]

for the ask meme (TES, obvs): 3,9, 13 (for naemon), 23!

thank you!! i wrote this all last night and i havent checked for coherency or errors so forgive me if it’s a bit scatterbrained at times (although yall should be used to incoherency coming from me ghhgfg.)

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3.) Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

someone said that they didn’t like serana and i was already sitting on the decision to unfollow them for other reasons and that. that was just the Final Straw.

but i think that’s it…? im so petty + impulsive (deadly combo) at times that maybe i did unfollow over a TES opinion another time but i can’t remember hgufuhfhxdfh

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9.) Most disliked character(s)? Why?

OOF this is a hard one, ill list the ones that come to mind rn;

molag bal. needs no explanation

darren guitar or whatever his name is. im sorry to anyone who likes him but i just.. can’t. he’s so obnoxious. he was toned down in summerset, probably because different people were writing him if i had to guess but in the main and daggerfall covenant questline? awful. his goddamn womanizing jokes at every second of the day was “kim, there’s people that are dying” at its finest.literally one or two “haha ladies amirite fellow man ;)/haha ladies amirite……… lady ;)” jokes can be.. bearable albeit still annoying but there was so much more than that. or they were so obnoxiously written that it seemed to be more frequent than in actuality, either way, darren guitar? 0/10also my view of him hasnt gotten better since someone sent me a rude ask about how darren had more personality than prince naemon in-game due to me joking about how i don’t like him and then subsequently blocked me for being irritated about the rudeness of the ask + the fact that im 99% sure they were the anon that appeared in my fucking inbox defending darren guitar every single time i breathed a single word about him

i completely forgot he existed until you listed him as disliked and now i hate him even more. that fucking. bard from the bannered mare. the one that harassed carlotta until you told him to fuck off. i hate that dude. always have

abnur tharn. mildly obnoxious with some amusing lines until you find out what he did to queen ayrenn like. small dick mannimarco joke is now renounced, little man. Perish.my view on Estre is Complicated because she’s a really neat character and villain and ranks as a favorite in the latter department but from like, a moral standpoint i loathe her.also while it wasn’t like. pelidil levels of shittiness i’m not fond of how she hurt naemon– but then again……. now that i think of it, i really don’t know what’d she COULD do other than keep him in the absolute dark until he inevitably gets caught up in the Shitshow otherwise. i wouldn’t suppose naemon to be 100% willing to join in her efforts or even keep completely quiet about them if she did decide to talk to him about it or let him know; and for all we know, she could’ve planned to do so eventually in some way– but the suddenness of the AD hero’s infiltration of the veiled heritance probably ruined any semblance of a plan she could’ve had. so on second thought, even from a “naemon is a perfect being and i will protect him with my life and loathe all who hurt him” standpoint, i don’t dislike her too much. let’s just reduce estre to like.. honorable mentions on my “disliked characters” list then lmao(also “moral standpoint” as if queen ayrenn is anything close to the pinnacle of absolute morality. estre is objectively worse on that front, though, so i suppose i still stand by that)

speaking of which i really… don’t like pelidil. again, moral standpoint. and “naemon is a perfect being and i will protect him with my life and loathe all who hurt him” standpoint. otherwise, he’s a neat villain and the quest in which you cut him down was one of the more impressive quests in the game IMO, or even in the entire game series. good build-up.

this is getting too long so i’ll cut it there, that’s all the characters that come to mind rn anyways hfhgdhg

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10.) Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

hmmmmmm

i guess if you view it in such a way, liking him is kind of unpopular– while there’s still a lot of those who even if not actively talking about him as a character, have praised his character/took his side/whatever, there’s also a good amount who don’t. not really in considering him a poorly written character, but rather from a (sorry to bring this phrase up so much so far) moral standpoint.

also, considering him in a semi-unironic “he did nothing wrong” way, which i do, is kind of unpopular– and i can understand that, in some ways. i dont think him snapping at the scene of the orrery was under his 100% control nor was anything subsequent, but there’s still the fact that he still is in an “i deserve the throne, fuck off” mindset in coldharbour, which, unless he’s STILL affected by the mantle and/or the orrery, is obviously a negative change in viewpoint compared to the “i’ll swallow my bitterness and remain loyal to my sister and the dominion, she is the rightful queen and i am just her shadow” you saw prior.

granted, i’d argue that even then, you have to consider the influence that pelidil had over him prior (as some have accurately put it before– whispered poison into his ear). especially with the fact that naemon’s quite young for an elf at… 26? around that age-range. i dont think altmer’s minds work in the way that, say, hobbits do, in that they age slower and this includes their mental capability, decision-making, etc.. (they obviously don’t) BUT, compared to an elf with more experience, there’s a bit of an… imbalance there. pelidil WAS the one who served naemon instead of the other way around so you’d figure the opposite if anything, but again, naemon = impressionable and emotionally vulnerable at the time.

anyways, got off-topic; my point was that naemon, when you consider the influence that pelidil and any other secretly heritance people that interacted with him, even when you use the fact that he still seems “corrupted” in coldharbour to frame him as bad… that ain’t it. there’s also the fact that he is being tortured, at that moment. big part of it. he PROBABLY isn’t in the right state of mind, to put it simply. but then again, i mean, one could still argue a whole “cool motive, still murder” take on it, so whatever. i dont know man ghfghduhbdfg

YIKES i rambled, holy shit. sorry. but otherwise, i dont think i have too many? there’s not much in the prince naemon…. sub-fandom, at least not enough to be able to render one opinion as unpopular compared to the next

(and i. Guess that headcanoning him as trans definitely has the potential to be unpopular. but i dont really talk about it or “enforce” it much other than off-hand comments that might imply such, drawing him with top surgery scars, etc.. so it hasn’t exactly been given any room to be considered remotely unpopular. haven’t gotten anon hate, snide comments, etc.. about any of it at all so it’s cool. but i’ve brought it up because… you know how fandoms are; if there was more to the prince naemon “fandom”, theoretically, it would be and therefore kind of IS an unpopular opinion. “does your arm hurt from reaching cassius” ok look, i just felt like i needed to provide one more unpopular opinion about naemon and i couldn’t figure out any other than that. but yes. yes, hurts a little)

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23.) Unpopular character you love?

unpopular as in commonly disliked, or unpopular in… amount of people that like them? with the latter, it’s def naemon. i love him with all my heart gfigufhgdugdfh but then again who didn’t know that

with the former… hm. the thing is a lot of characters disliked in this fandom are disliked with good reason IMO– nevermind. almalexia. not to open any #diskhorse wounds but almalexia’s one of them ghdfhguhg jot that down

and i’ve heard some talk that veya is kind of unpopular, what with the recent summerset developments? yeah, fuck that, veya’s one of my favorites. this fandom (or. any fandom lets be real) has an awful tendency to praise any goddamn male character’s flaws or “negative” depth as redeemable character complexity and something that can be looked past, and yet, you see even REMOTELY the same amount if not more character depth in a female character and they’re hated. pointing this out is nothing new but it’s truly just…. something to behold.

and on that note im just going to renounce my prior statement of “a lot of characters disliked in this fandom are disliked with good reason” that’s the dumbest shit i’ve ever said. or perhaps an addendum stating that it’s only applicable to male characters is more in order? or that it’s the opposite for male characters: liked with bad reason. or… liked with over-exaggerated reason disproportionate to the actual amount of depth, complexity, and/or likeability said character actually has, paired with hatred for female characters with the same amount of complexity. “bruh don’t you obsess over prince naemon–” Yeah And What the Fuck Of It

anyways moving on sorry i got distracted hgdfgyfgh. that’s all the characters that come to mind? disregarding characters that are unpopular in an unappreciated sort of way rather than a disliked way, i really dont have a lot

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salty fandom (elder scrolls) opinions

[shoushatohaisha]

review: hajimari no kyojin (osaka 6/1)

so. hello. i usually write up my butai thoughts as, um, 100+ tweet threads in the immediate wake of whatever i just saw, but this time around i thought i'd work them out into a proper report, of a sort. if you, too, have seen this show already and want to talk about it... please. any time. always.

about reviewing: this is my very favorite 2.5D franchise, ever. but this is also a review, not a cheerleading exercise, so not every single thing i have to say is unrelentingly positive. having said that, i respect kinoshita, wada, suga-zachou, and the staff at large more than just about any creative team in this corner of japanese theater fandom so like. i'm not here to drag, lol.

about spoilers: i talk about the plot elements covered but try to avoid spoiling any of the fun production surprises. :) happy to do a more spoilery play-by-play later if folks are curious.

about length: i just checked and it's 2400 words im so sorry.

without further ado...

first of all, i admit that based on the preview clips i doubted, and i was swiftly taken to task for doubting. IM SORRY WORRY-SAN i trust u implicitly and i should have known better. after the major changes in shinka no natsu, i was concerned that bringing back the revolving stage and the original opening theme would feel stale/regressive. it did not. while they did bring back the revolving element they also extended the stage backward and added a second level behind a full stage height projection screen – the second level was used to do some neat staging for flashbacks/parallels and the screen was used to, how shall we say this, up their projection game in a major way, which i frankly did not think was possible. i will not spoil the details but it was pretty great, on a purely technical level.

i also realized that a lot of the repetition – opening with the bike scene, bringing back the original opening credits music, the staging, etc – is the "look back" over the last couple years that i'd expected to come this fall. they are very obviously already preparing for the end – you could think of this as part one of their last show, with the fall as part two. the show opens with a restaging of sixth grader hinata seeing the little giant on tv for the first time – then the current karasuno team take the place of the tv and hinata joins them for a team jog. "karasuno, fight!" "oh!" "fight!" "oh!" only then each character calls out their signature line from the show so far. "uchi no renchuu wa chanto tsuyoi" / "mou tobenai karasu nante yobasenai" / "murabito b mo tatakaemasu!"

and haha. let me tell you. BOY, DID I FEEL THINGS. a lot of things. i think yachi got me the worst but they were all real bad. (i have so many feelings about yachi's story and what a beautiful job saitou ami did with her character on stage. god. ;_;)

the theme of this play was the role of captain – what makes a good captain, what a captain does for the team, and how to step into those shoes when the captain is gone. the johzenji match is fun, but here, in a sense, it exists more or less to set up the wakutani match – (re)establishing daichi's importance so that his absence feels like the gut punch it is. and fully settling the weight of that responsibility on ennoshita's shoulders, as both daichi's substitute on the court and the captain-in-waiting.

with that in mind, the rival schools: imo it wasn't strictly necessary to cast full teams for each school – each match got its own dedicated act, and unlike, for example, nekoma/datekou in karasuno fukkatsu (which had a similar story structure), there aren't really any individual characters on these rival schools who have a role as such other than terushima and takeru. (you know, the captains. see above. XD) so in theory one could get this done with, like, one actor for each captain and then an ensemble cast playing the rest of the team across both matches. HOWEVER, having all those bodies allows them to do super cool stuff visually, and why force yourself to create the illusion of a full team if you don't have to? i.e., /i/ sure am not complaining, isn't it nice to have $$$ to achieve the max vision of your choreographer. XD

i also have no doubt that the kids playing these other characters are doing whatever they can to create a character within the ensemble, and i suspect there's plenty for repeat viewers to pick up on, esp during say the johzenji match (see below). however for the first time viewer following the main flow of the story it's more or less a very large ensemble cast.

the johzenji chaos was well expressed, haha, there was so damn much going on all the time that i hardly knew where to look. (i've also seen opinions on j-twitter that that diluted the impact and i can see that too – it worked for me as a "funny" match that didn't cross the line into comic relief, but ymmv.) i thought the final scene with misaki would pack more of a punch, but i fully expect them to cry at daisenshuuraku so that might fill in the last 10% that's missing rn.

wakutani are another Good Dance Team. one did get a sense, stylistically, of fukurodani- and nekoma-lite with johzenji and wakunan, respectively – i assume that was intentional. mirroring the cats vs owls match, as it were. yanagihara rin's takeru was like… scary?? i had to rewatch those episodes this weekend to see if i'd just forgotten something, but no, stage takeru is not so much reliable middle brother as scowly quiet tough guy. he looked like a kyoutani tbh, and looking at the kid actually cast for kyoutani, one wonders if someone in casting mixed up some paperwork or something. having said that, yanagihara was great at being the character he was, i enjoyed what he did on stage. i'm just not sure that character was takeru. XD (edit: ok having just rewatched, i have to revise this somewhat, i think a big part of my impression was due to being too far back to properly see his expressions the first time around -- up close he was much smilier, and bc i was thinking about it i noticed some nice details like him going over for a family hug afterward.) otoh big post-match scene – all of wakutani, actually – was really good. v effective, i heard sniffles around me.

during this match, johzenji reappeared dressed as takeru's family: FUCKING HILARIOUS omg, everyone involved has clearly learned how to do this right wrt blocking, the very fine line between comic relief and intrusion, etc, after the, er, shaky shousha to haisha experiment of kuroken doubling as oikawa's fangirls. seichou shita na, errone.

also, some great wire work for hinata and takeru – you could tell kenta is really comfortable up there these days. the first time the wires came into play one of the women behind me went "UWO!" which, when a japanese theatergoer makes a noise out loud, that's a true sign something's impressive. XD

nekoma vs fukurodani: Yeah, That Happened. it is a testament to how well done karasuno vs wakunan was that i didn't just spend the entire time screeching BRING BACK CATS VS OWLS because fjkdajfkdlsfjd KYAA. another good staging moment – they used mirrors to create the effect of two full teams playing at a crowded gymnasium, it was brill. i won't spoil some of the fun details but vvjakdlfjdf. and tbh i think the best performance of the four was probably shouri's?? not that this is news but istg idk how someone so soft offstage does THAT on stage. is it this "acting" thing you speak of.

new bokuaka: i mean it was clear some of this material was meant for yoshimoto kouki and i did kinda miss him – i appreciate higashi-san's pinch hitting and he did a solid job. but. ah well. HAVING SAID THAT. fucking "michi wo tsukurimasu yo" i mean we should all be grateful it wasn't kouki and yuuki or it would have just been a fucking fanfic on stage. it was still bad and i don't even go here. XD

and last but not least, arita ushiwaka kenji: not exactly the world's most natural line delivery but that's fine because, i mean, he's ushiwaka. and his physical presence was perfect. which was about all he was called on to do in this particular show, ahaha.

now, for karasuno. and specifically, for my son, kawahara kazuma. remember what i said approximately a thousand words ago, about captains and captains in waiting and stepping up to the plate? (or onto the court, as it were.) ennoshita's story was the heart of the wakutani match and kazuma carried the second act. he was. so. good. he had good material to work with, of course, but he made it even better. i was saying to a friend that in retrospect i think this is one of the very very few parts of the series that actually played better and more emotionally affecting on stage than in the source material (as opposed to differently good/differently affecting). in the manga/anime, you can only see what the paneling or the frame shows you, and those initial paneling/framing choices are focused on the drama of CAPTAIN DOWN. but on the stage, daichi goes down… and off to the side you see ennoshita freeze. and from that moment on, for kazuma, it's go time. he doesn't let up until the end of post-match scene in (here) the locker room – which, jesus, that scene. it packs ten times the punch it does in the anime. because of kazuma.

sorry if i sound like a crazy person here ahaha. but like. like, imagine you have been acting since childhood, you've studied dance with famous choreographers and innovators, you had a main role in The Franchise That Changed 2.5D as a teenager, you've done a solo album, you have a serious history in performing arts... and you get cast in what was initially the smallest role of the entire karasuno team. and you take it! and pull your weight! kazuma was a team player for three years and he deserved this chance to let his actual skills shine so much. ;_; because i don't necessarily think he would have been better in any of the other roles than his actual teammates – but i do think he is a much better actor than several of his actual teammates. and he finally got the opportunity to show that.

anyway, when it came time for curtain calls, the applause swelled noticeably for kazuma – a louder ovation than anyone except kagechan and kenta. and one of those people clapping her hands off, say in row 20, just a random row choice, was definitely tearing up at the same time.

IN OTHER KARASANEWS. kt-san. LIVE IN PERSON KT-SAN BACK IN THE ROLE HE WAS MEANT FOR cries into my hands i love him daichi-saaaaaaaaaan. very occasionally his delivery reminded me he's a model not an actor, if you know what i mean, but like, for the vast part it didn't matter because he is naturally such a perfect fit. have i mentioned i love him.

new suga: mmmmm. he looked and moved fine but his line delivery did not convince me. tbf it's not like suga has a huge role to play in these matches so 1) it's not a huge deal 2) he didn't get much chance to get into the character. either he'll get better or he won't, and if he doesn't it's not going to sink the next play or anything. he seems like a nice enough kid, i wish him well!

kageyama tatsuya: still can't yell and enunciate at the same time. loved that they brought back the archer analogy from shinka no natsu though!! it was one of my favorite things about his kageyama, and it's nice that it's something he "owns" instead of imitating/inheriting from tatsunari.

tsukishima & yamaguchi: miura kairi continues to get even better, i'm so pleased. <3 also, i love love love that they still use the musical motif from shousha to haisha for yamaguchi's jump float serve. it was the same in shinka no natsu, it's the same here. THE TSUKKIYAMA WAS REAL CUTE, great detail work before and after the serve as well as after tsukki's block(s). as for tsukishima, much as they brought back kageyama's archer imagery, they brought back tsukki's fancy katana kill block. (they didn't waste kondou shouri, either, i'll leave it at that.)

last but not least, MY ACTUAL SON AND FEELINGS TWIN, SUGA KENTA: ok like. to set the scene here. i have mad respect for this kid and also love him to death as a human. i think he puts more thought into this production than anyone else in the cast – he is practically worry-san's AD. and he clearly has a lot of real deep thoughts and feelings about the source material. so deep in fact that it took a while for me to come around to his hinata because while, for example, tatsunari's kageyama could have walked straight off my television screen, kenta went down to the manga and built hinata up from there. he didn't have a choice – he's nothing like murase ayumu's voice. all too often we, and i include myself here, think of the two dimensions in 2.5D as anime, rather than manga... but just as there's a big gap between the two dimensions of animation and the three dimensions of live theater, there's as big a gap again between static black-and-white drawing, and movement and color and sound. and when i looked at kenta's hinata as something created solely from furudate's art style, it all slotted into place for me. (naturally, ymmv.)

it also took kenta longer than some of the others, i think, to portray all of what he wanted to. shoen hinata was pretty yelly, and pretty single-register yelly. hinata is a yelly character, of course, but the balance between that hinata and Serious Match Hinata was out of whack at first. this got better and better with every show. and then—

his encounter with ushiwaka here. was IT. it was what i was looking for all this time. his delivery of hinata's big line there was like – i think maybe i clapped my hands over my mouth, unclear, bc it was like the final missing piece and i was so happy. kentaaaaa. ;____;

part of me wonders if this is what kenta's always had in his head but maybe couldn't get his face/voice to express the way he wanted it? OR, IT'S KENTA, SO MAYBE IT WAS ON PURPOSE and his previous Serious Hinata was meant to be like, just a feral hunger child whereas this is the kid who experienced the heartbreak of losing to seijou. i would love to ask him tbh. XD

anyway, my son, after five plays continues to grow in his portrayal of this character. kenta is the heart of gekidan haikyuu in so many ways, and i will be at their graduation show if it kills me.

(breathes out) i think that's. everything. a best setter award to anyone who read this far, and feel free to ask if there's anything specific you want to know about? i will be seeing it again this weekend for daisenshuuraku and will be sure to report back on who cried, etc. all hail volleyball stage the end. 🏐

[expfcultragreen]

How is it kevins fault that he has (criminally?) unmet emotional needs and was assigned antifascist at birth, like CAN YOU READ? LOOK AT THIS SCRIPT.

Kevin: mom there's a hegemony being enacted against me by one of your peers, my autonomy is being overridden and i feel it's unfair...

Kate: no fuck off im busy, no mom here, no moms for kevin.

Kevin: ...(i would LIKE you to be a mom to me when i tell you that) the hegemony in question is irrational (from my pov--but, im leaving myself open to guidance, and really, any reassurance will do, even gaslighting me about my own media-consumption boundaries so long as it seems kind and spares me a moment), i really crave guidance right now because a parent-figure in this house has just told me i have very low social stature in his mind and thereby diminished me--here and minutes ago, nominally on your watch as my main emotional shepherd)

Kate: he was right, although he is a known scumbag and i hate him personally; i am entirely inclined to side against you regardless. (Frankly, the more time you spend socializing with the older, masculine members of this family and watching violent media, the more aggressive and reactive to bullying your equilibrium gets, which is annoying for the rest of us because we all bully you. So shut up about watching anything that might Give You Ideas.)

Kevin: speaking with my gestures i have decided to self-regulate in your company anyway due to the social defeat i just experienced apparently without any recourse or solace, other than whatever entertainment i can make for myself quietly here by your side, mommy dearest, in the wake of this emotionally disruptive moment i just had

Kate: kevin get out, stop mooching around looking for some drop of sympathy i dont have for you...and leave the magazine, snakes manifest in my mood when you enjoy life for even a second i am full serious rn kevin like, just die. I mean really, fuck you.

Kevin: yknow what? Fuck you back. Fuck. You. Back.

[The audience who loves child abuse and forgot or never knew what it was like to be the child: "omg kevin is a monster, how dare a mere child speak back so candidly, his mommy issues are clearly his own fault and come out of nowhere because this all seems totally normal and fine to me, a drooling sack of shit. Why doesnt the youngest member of the household rise to the demand of his family that he be more mature than they are simply to convenience them? With no one modeling adequately ample maturity for him to emulate? What could be extraordinarily rotten about that expectation?"

Me, tired: hello? this character is an emotionally neglected 8 year old, what is your damage, was the person who hurt you blond by any chance? Blue eyes? A child? The other children? Was it one of the culkins personally? like, who?

Does kevin give you second hand dysphoria because he hasnt learned yet what you had to learn so painfully--that no one other than himself loves him enough to begin to protect him or truly excuse his tantrums? Or even vaguely grasp the architecture of the tantrums' cause/s? That his family isn't a family per se like one might imagine from osmosis of the dominant cultural mythos, but rather an economic unit of convenience with pretentions, in which suboptimal convenience-facilitation is the only real crime?

In the first movie, does his mother hitch to chicago at great personal inconvenience--that the rest of the family is blithely unwilling to even imagine taking on to support her/kevin--because... she finally feels an inkling of consideration for what she presumes kevin is going through ("he must be so scared"; this scene is played as dramatic irony, and serves to again illustrate the way in which the family frames kevin as fundamentally incompetent, primarily because he isnt always as competent at being seen and not heard as they would like him to be), or because of the threat to her highly conventionally-neoliberal self-image as A(/the) Mother ((it may well not be her primary identity but even so, still a very core accessory to her success in mainstream circles eg the ongoing stability of her marriage and--possibly--by extension her finances/entire material wellbeing may be based in large part on the perception of her as Motherhood(/mother-of-my-children-and-their-ongoing-primary-careorganizer) Material)) if she doesn't exhibit maximum effort in a crisis. That's like Good Mother Checklist item 1, that's a minimum threshold of Good Motherhood type thing. She even canonically has a lowkey meltdown about this very question vis a vis her orientation to the issue--her true motive--on the way to Chicago, and the script's only advice, via the polka band ex machina, is to remember that "no one" is a Good Parent (Mother). Touring genre musicians who NEVER see their kids are held up as her/our models for "well-meaning" failures of parenting simply being taken as a given and accepted. Excuses excuses! Compulsory parents = disordered kids. Its an extreme disadvantage in life to be made to exist as a child in a group for any reason other than an entirely platonic love of children on the part of the group. Kevin is severely disadvantaged. They could afford another child in terms of their salaries, not their time or concern. Its possible that ALL their children are simply props to advertise their social desireability as "well-adjusted adults" to other unrelated adults they require social-leverage-neutrality or -advantage with. The older children seem hostile and dissatisfied when given the task of co-parenting kevin, and this is either because kevin is under some metaphysical curse (like being a fictional whipping boy) that makes everyone treat him like trash for no real reason or because they are misdirecting the frustrations they share with kevin onto kevin simply because he is the Appointed Acceptable Target of all frustration as per the household authorities' behavioral modeling. Their parents didnt REALLY want him: they wanted him notably less than they did the others although they didnt ultimately want any of them; maybe even the novelty and selfish appeal of new-baby-attention was gone by kevin, because they stopped having kids after him...maybe because they realized the last one was one too many. And they act like he was one too many, and so does everyone else.

Its just kind of moot to say, "having him was your mistake to make, you couldnt actually nurture yet another child as well as you did the first few, and it was your responsibility as parents of any depth of skill, to know that and plan accordingly" when the child in question has already been born and youre entirely settled into the routine of acting like it was his mistake in "making you" have him or in being born and not shitting out spun gold or whatever they needed from him to ascribe him any lasting worth in their lives. They treat him like a flea.

And then these deeply deranged people watch this horrible, fictive contrivance of a too-typically dysfunctional post-80s uppermiddleclass colonial family, and theyre like "god i HATE fleas, EWW" and they make a meme about kEvIn wUz EvIL u GuYz LoOoL. Like, ok, try watching the good son, thats actually a 90s family movie about Macaulay Culkin's character being an unimaginably evil kid. In fact, if you focus, he is verbatim exactly like buzz mcallister but with higher stakes...(canonically; we dont actually know what buzz does outside the house, apart from buying kidgun ammo and "having a girlfriend." We know he gleefully fantasizes that a local he sees regularly is always hauling dismembered corpse parts around in public and that this is an open secret everyone shares (out of prurient callousness?)...whether he fantasizes this for effect (to directly cause terror in his audience, who he accutely knows included a psychologicaly-vulnerabe small child he's specifically culturally-deemed to have a great deal of responsibility toward in terms of increased safety and wellbeing) or enjoyment (to directly cause pleasure in himself) is up for debate.

Ever heard of a shitty true crime book called "invisible darkness"? [[Not that ive read it but i know what its about because every canadian over a certain age does; its about such conventionally ~acceptable/eerily unremarkable killers that they evaded accusations or charges for a freaky long time--freaky given that their targets werent exclusively people fash-fundamentalist cops also want dead. No these werent over-the-hill 20 something grannies turning tricks, these were 16 year old maybe-virgins! [those are supposed to be for the good boys or their kids, right? Done the decent way where you go to a church first and you dont do anything you'd have to kill her to hide having done. Unlike sex workers, nudgenudge eh blueboys]. The cops dont usually like being taunted by the sex-killers who arent just pro bono pigs; such professional discourtesy can't go unpunished!)]]. Buzz already having a girlfriend implies to me that his fixation on "mature themes" and even, his fixation on being percieved as mature particularly when it's a lie, may be just getting started. It could go anywhere. Choose your own adventure.

However, if you want to talk about undersold canonical home alone villains, look no further. It aint kevin in MY universe, motherfucker. Its the kid whose private arsenal was on hand. Its the kid who ate the fucking picky-eater pizza on purpose to cause an accessibility issue he knew everyone would blame kevin for, because they always do, and because buzz is a fucking demonic specter

Some people like, grow up and forget everything. Not bangarang!

Just 👏 because 👏 kevin 👏 vaguely 👏 demonstrates 👏 some 👏 psychopathy 👏 doesn't 👏 mean 👏 he 👏 did 👏 anything 👏 wrong 👏

He's fighting adults you could more reasonably consider psychopaths by the same indicators, theyre just less dexterous so they end up looking like "underdogs" despite being two violent middleaged men on a regular/ritualized crimespree for strictly personal profit and pleasure, vs one violent 8 year old whose entire ability to survive revolves around the house he's squatting not being destroyed (eg flooded) and/or overrun with cops (this is why he calls the cops from the neighbors and says he's mr. Murphy; he doesnt want to go into foster care or whatever, he's self-emancipated and thats a precarious position. He has no legal right to his dwelling or his newfound autonomy.

Also, he clearly demonstrates empathy. The problem is that his older brother is a bad influence, his family expects slightly too much maturity and gives too little genuine concern and they mercilessly punish failures of this functionally-mandated, developmentally-pressured maturity and emotional low maintenance, and he's an american born in the 80s*. So his overall spread on the psychopathic trait bingocard is upsetting. But buzz is entirely worse and the rest of the family are just too up their own asses to see this. Its all in the scripts and the scenework. Buzz is a total freak and kevin is stuck in a competitive dynamic with him. Its a nightmare. The parents are clearly hyper-permissive with buzz, likely because, as demonstrated at the effectively-unmediated family trial in HA2, he has the modicum of self-confident finesse that (just maybe 🙃) comes with his age/experience advantage and the low emotional deprivation he experiences as The Oldest (this seems to be That kind of nuclear family--defacto/unconsciusly patriarchal; kevin isnt The Baby, he's the RUNT. The omega runt, Fuller, isnt part of their specific nuclear unit but kevin barely outranks him across the whole family as we've seen it--the fact that there is a steep, linear pecking order (siiiiigh, ~hierarchy~) is established by the hide-a-bed fiasco. Ergo kevin is outranked by everyone in his own daily unit; we see them shit on him, it flows like their breathing. We see them primed to be so dottingly receptive to buzz's proxy gaslighting of kevin; they revile kevin as a matter of course, whereas buzz can virtually do no wrong. "I hate this family" fuck, me too kid, me too. Fuck em all, fuck the robbers, fuck everyone except bird lady and mr duncan and the shovel slayer. Fuck this meme and all its versions, fuck the meme makers, and finally fuck renegade cut for privilege-jacketing an 8 year old in order to uplift his abusers to the status of antiheroes for obsessively refusing to just not break into that one house, ~because ~harry ~had ~his ~eye ~on ~it. My incredulity seems boundless, because its been YEARS since these memes or that video were made and i havent found the bounds yet. I was hoping to care less by now but it pretty much just makes me madder and madder.

Tell you what, new lore drop: kevin transitions in college and lesbian-marries the shovel slayer's grandkid after a mutual proposal at the new york symphony and they run a bespoke gourmet salt sample mailer box (and seasonal plowing) business together in schaumberg and every december they go to the old church they first met at, and help organize a toy drive

*if kevin is 8 during the first movie and it's set during release year not filming, he was born in 82. Tough vintage! In some ways the 85's are the worst and in some ways we're where the wave broke (and fuck gen x)

[builder051]

im the anon who asked for the IW peter drabble. honestly I was flipping shit as well so if you make up the entire scene that’s 100% fine, I’d love to see your take on it too

Ok, we’ll see about this.  I don’t know if I’m in the right frame of mind today (I’m in the middle of a Stucky thing and an OC thing rn), but we’ll see.  I have loose plans to see IW again this weekend, so I might wait.  

Knowing me, though, I’ll end up writing it twice.

[scottstiles]

hi divvy! i know you are MAD right now, so don't answer this until you feel like it, but when you're ready i'd love to hear your thoughts on music on the sabbath and yom kippur! i love hearing you talk about jewish things tbh.

first off i’m so sorry i didn’t answer this whole time. it’s not that i was so mad (that came and went) but i did need a little distance from thinking about it and then i thought why not wait and see how the rest of the holiday goes before replying.

secondly oh my goodness i can’t believe you love hearing me talk about anything XD but it feels really nice that you enjoy my random outbursts about religion. i get that it must be weird for people (especially ones who know me irl) that i have this whole aspect of me that doesn’t fit at all with the way i present myself/live my life (for the most part- except the people who only know that part of me, of course, my students/congregation members etc). i have such a weird dual personality when it comes to this but anyway that is a HUGE can of beans for maybe another time.

but anyway here’s a bottom line about me to help us in this discussion about music on shabbat (im just gonna call it shabbat from here on cuz “the sabbath” is so weird for me to write for some reason) and holidays:

my elementary school was a secular zionist/traditional jewish day school. this might sound completely ridiculous so i’ll break it down- it wasn’t an orthodox place (girls and boys did everything together, nobody had to dress or act a certain way because of religion, and it was basically non-denominational so… secular), but it was traditional in the sense that we did morning prayers every day from the traditional (i guess u could call it orthodox) prayerbook, we learned Torah every day and everything to do with jewish traditions/ritual practices, learned about Israel, jewish history, etc. we, of course, studied all of the secular subjects (including french) at the same time. at the time i also went to a jewish summer camp from age 6-12, but it was more traditional and pretty jewish/israel intensive. we also prayed every day, observed shabbat in the orthodox sense (no electricity, no “work”, special activities, lots of food and rest), and even had special events on certain days like tisha b’av (the fast day commemorating the destruction of the temple), and maccabiah games at the end of the summer (like color war/olympics, but we had to talk hebrew the whole time or we lost points XD). my favorite part of camp was an event called ma’apilim, where the counselors would wake us up in the middle of the night and the entire camp would run through this simulation of the experience of the holocaust refugees being smuggled into palestine in the mid-40s. i can describe that whole experience for you in detail if you want but maybe not right now since i’ve rambled so much already.

SUFFICE TO SAY i grew up in a seriously jewish environment, but not a religious home. as a teenager i went to a jewish high school, though not at all as religious, and became active in my synagogue youth group. OH also, when i was 9, my parents switched us over to the reconstructionist synagogue (from a conservative one) so my sisters and i could have a real bat mitzvah (in orthodox and conservative shuls girls aren’t allowed to read from the Torah like boys do). so thru high school i was very involved in jewishy things and my synagogue, and i got really attached to reading Torah and the prayer service in my synagogue. my reason for emphasis is because, as i’ve said, i’d been exposed to the traditional prayer service for most of my life, but praying in this shul has always been a completely different experience.

in school and in camp, despite the traditional service (and separation of boys and girls, in camp only), i was always able to sing out loud as much as i wanted. but, traditionally, prayer is lead by an individual- the cantor- and the congregation (and the rabbi) only “participates” out loud in certain parts. that’s how it is in most synagogues in montreal except the temple and mine. in my shul, we’ve never had a cantor, and the entire service is basically communally led. our rabbi was also very special. our leader for 40 years, he was a pioneer in the reconstructionist movement, creating his own prayer book (not new prayers, just his own translation and commentary and additions) and passover haggadah. he wasn’t a singer, but he had a musical soul and when he led prayers it just moved me every time. the tunes for the prayers were sometimes the same as the traditional melody, and sometimes not. it always took me awhile to get used to new melodies or songs he would introduce (i’m so inflexible, what a shock), but i would always eventually suck it up. for him. basically for 25+ years i got used to doing things a certain way in my shul. i also watched through the years as new people came and left, including my entire generation (moved away/got married/not interested in synagogue), until the whole makeup of my shul was essentially completely different. but we’ve always had a few core members that stuck around, and the melodies have always remained. i was always proud to carry it on.

so, a little about the reconstructionist movement and synagogues in montreal. reconstructionism began post-holocaust when the founder, mordechai kaplan, realized how difficult it was becoming for people to continue to have faith in  religion after such trauma. people couldn’t connect, or didn’t want to be involved at all anymore. so the movement began as a place for these people, to maintain a connection to judaism without feeling the pressure of having to believe in god or accept all of the traditional tenets of the religion. this isn’t the same as reform, by the way, which a lot of people think is the only other denomination of judaism besides orthodox/conservative. i don’t wanna give a lesson on denominations rn, but basically reconstructionism is all about adapting and shaping judaism so that it can fit into your life and inform your values without infringing on however else you choose to live. okay all of that just to get to this motherfuckingpoint:

playing music on shabbat/(certain) holidays is part of the laws of shabbat, codified by rabbis during the temple period as part of the Talmud. these laws, which are basically a breakdown of all the things you cannot or must do on shabbat, are what is considered oral Torah, just as binding as the laws in the written Torah from moses. they had to break it down because “on the 7th day you must rest” isn’t exactly specific, so how can you know if you break the law? there are 39 things that are listed as “work” which you cannot do on shabbat. the two main reasons for not playing an instrument on shabbat are: the instrument might break and you might be tempted to fix it (and in so doing, do one of the 39 acts), and the fact that instruments were played in the Temple, and we’re not supposed to be doing anything they did in the Temple until we’ve built the new one (hence no more sacrifices even tho almost the entire book of leviticus deals with the priestly ritual laws).

okay so those are the rules. now, for me personally. what’s my problem? i’m a member at a reconstructionist synagogue, not an orthodox one. i’m not a religious person. i don’t keep the laws of shabbat on a regular basis. what. is. my. problem?

maybe i should have mentioned, along with my heavily traditionally influenced childhood, there was also a point in my life where i did decide to keep all the rules. for about 5 years in my mid twenties i became completely zealous when it came to the laws of shabbat/holidays (maybe cuz i was trying to get my jewish teaching career off the ground idek). i walked 45 minutes each way to shul. i even walked clear across town on saturdays to get to the theatre in time to meet my mom for the ballet at 8pm after sunset. i made them turn off the microphones if i was going to be on the bimah (pulpit) in shul. i was a bit insane, but nobody was offended and neither was i, i just tried it out and eventually decided it wasn’t for me.

i guess what i’m trying to say is that my problem with music in synagogue comes from a few places: 1- my “traditional/religious” brain saying NO it’s just NOT ALLOWED, IT’S TOO MUCH. YOU BREAK SO MANY RULES AS IT IS, and i guess that’s harder to turn off than i would like 2- the shul i grew up in and love was one where our collective voices were the instrument, and that alone has had a huge impact on my spiritual growth. i don’t like being drowned out (my own and other’s voices) when i’m praying. 3- while my rabbi occasionally would whip out the guitar, this new rabbi has it out every single shabbat. to me, prayer and ritual worship are not a performance. when i see someone on a “stage”- in this case the bimah- with an instrument, i’m in the mind frame of a concert, and all of my attention is focused on the musician. i just can’t pray like that. when i lived in nyc i worked at this huge reform synagogue that had like 5 rabbis and 3 cantors and every friday night service was like a broadway spectacle with a full orchestra and choir and what not. it was beautiful, but i couldn’t concentrate on the praying. i don’t know how many people could. i understand that for most people music in itself is a spiritual experience, and that makes complete sense, but for me, my spiritual experience in synagogue is hearing voices in prayer.

i just realized i didn’t talk about yom kippur specifically. yk is one of the only times of the year that most jews in the world decide to do the exact same thing (the other is passover). jews who eat bacon every morning and work all day on saturday will put their lives aside and fast. most will even be in synagogue for kol nidre (the night before) or neilah (the night of), depending on your ethnic background (for ashkenazis the former is most important, for sephardim the latter). the main part of the kol nidre service (which is the beginning of yk), is the kol nidre prayer itself, which is supposed to be chanted 3 times, starting off soft and each time getting progressively louder. as a child i led the kol nidre service once in the conservative shul where we went, and it was unbelievable i’ll never forget it, so i’ve always had a special connection to this prayer and melody. in my current shul we’ve always had a choir, and a cantor, for the occasion, much like many traditional congregations do. i’ve never really liked it because i can’t sing aloud all three times, and therefore don’t feel the same connection to the prayer, but i dealt with it. bringing in an orchestra was just kinda a last straw i guess? i didn’t want to have to deal with all of that negative bitterness as i’m trying to ask god to nullify my vows so i can be clean again.

oy gevalt. this was an essay, and not a well thought out one at that. sorry :// my main point is, basically, that for me music on shabbat is complicated, and it’s not just about the law, because clearly i’m not a “follow every law” kinda person. i don’t feel like i fit into any particular jewish mold, thanks to my upbringing, and i can’t really connect to any of the denominations, so i pick and choose what’s meaningful to me. luckily i stuffed a lot of information into my brain (thank you mcgill jewish studies), and i feel more comfortable doing so than i might have in my youth because i actually know and understand my options. maybe i’m not the best jew i can be, but i’m trying to be the best divvy. :)

[verdigrisprowl]

Feb 6 Lost Light Stream - Transformers Prime 57-59

Prowl was vaguely bothered by Insecticons. He’s getting better. He didn’t have to leave the room this time.

After the stream he was stuck there for a while because good music kept coming on. Rodimus’s playlist is too short, though. (Prowl’s now sent him some additions.)

Crosscut: ((Oh, ACDC wow XD This makes me think of my high school years.)) CptRodimus: *just streatched out over a couch never the back today finishing sharpening Pip.* CptRodimus: ((rodimus loves them =) CptRodimus: ((near the back* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave is as prepared for tonight’s impending double whammy as he can be. He strides in and parks himself on his couch, one leg over the and arms crossed atop them.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *The minis charge in and scatter around after.* Windchill: *Walks in.* ItsyBitsySpyers: \WEAPON!\ And Frenzy’s scuttling over to see Pip. Crosscut: ((Them and Guns n’ Roses was the only CD I had back then I used to listen to them while skateboarding so that’s instantly what I relate them to.)) Airachnid: [peeks helm through the door before walking in] Windchill: *Makes as if to wave, but fans his face instead.* Windchill: Oh my god, what’s that smell? CptRodimus: Sup mechs? Windchill: *Stares pointedly at Rodimus.* Windchill: Oh. Windchill: *Can’t smell anything and needs to shut up + sit down.* CptRodimus: *looks curious up at Windcill* You dont like the scent of victory? Oh must be the Con in you.~ Txen: *the predacons make a much less dramatic and more timely entrance than last week, once again followed by Shockwave* Crosscut: -pops in, looking around the room- I can only be here a short time sadly, I just wanted to say hellow to everyone. Windchill: Is THAT what that is? Windchill: *Doesn’t look convinced.* CptRodimus: Hey Crosscut! *waves then returns to his sharpening the blade* Txen: *DS and Lynx beeline for the food, predictably, though DS stops long enough to chirp “Cool sword” in Roddy’s direction* Crosscut: Evening, Captain. ItsyBitsySpyers: //Yo, Crosscut.// Rumble waves too. boomtank: -is on time for once!- ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave nods at Blaster.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *And at Shockwave and his companions* Crosscut: -He looks a bit confused by the mincon’s addressing him but wanting to be polite he waves back- Ah, hello…Rumble, wasn’t it? Bruin: *clomp clomp here comes bruin & co. Everyone came tonight because DRAgons* boomtank: -waves back- Hello Windchill: *He’s going to sit down and take up an entire couch, as usual. Crosscut: Sorry if that’s wrong, I’m not great with names sometimes. CptRodimus: *looks up at the chrip in his direction and grins widely* Epiphany -is- pretty cool isnt he? Too bad he is recharging or I’d introduce you!“ Txen: *Predaking recognizes Soundwave as That Helpful/Polite One and nods.* CptRodimus: It’s pipe’s song and he isn;t here. MAN! boomtank: -settles somewhere out of the way again- ItsyBitsySpyers: //Yep. ’S cool, ain’t talked much. But hey, uh–// Now that he thinks about it, he trots over and sticks his hand out. //Thanks. Y'know. For lettin’ me do the thing.// Txen: DS: *surprised enough to stop with a snack halfway to his mouth* …"He”? …Is this wunna your… bipedal-bot things… *you all turn into WEIRD stuff sometimes* Bruin: *uh oh high pitched song, the wolves are going to try and “sing” along* Crosscut: -He nods and shakes the small bot’s hand- Of course, you did a fine job as well if I might add. Bruin: *it is more words than howling thankfully* Txen: *speaking of dragons, Skylynx is going to curl around the back of one of the couches in beast-mode. he’s not anywhere near predakings’ size, it’ll be fine* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Startled look and then a huge beam* //Heh. Thanks, mech.// *HIS DAY IS MADE* Crosscut: Damn..-checks the time and sighs- I’m afraid I have to go already. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Nod.* ItsyBitsySpyers: //Take it easy, huh?// Windchill: *Howls too!* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Ravage looks at all the howlers with disdain* Crosscut: Sorry everyone, I was hoping to watch at least a little with you, perhaps next time….And Rumble, I look forward to seeing you at our next try outs whenever we do a new play! Windchill: *You don’t want him to meow, Ravage.* FakeProwl: *appears* Txen: *is with ravage on that one* Bruin: *can't rain on their parade ravage* CptRodimus: *onto the final step of the shining now* Yeah, he has a bi-pedal but sword is hos forged shape-- he can also turn into a gun! Txen: ((skylynx rather, gdi)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *A greeting nod to Prowl* Crosscut: -Waves to everyone, even the only now arriving Prowl, on his way out- Goodbye. FakeProwl: *reflexively covers his audials before he realizes he can turn down his avatar's audio input* CptRodimus: Awe see ya Crosscut FakeProwl: Hel— er, goodbye. CptRodimus: *damn he wanted to see the easily flustered song to his song* Bruin: *well, time to go sit in the usual spot on the far wall* Windchill: *Howls off-key, even. He doesn't care what song is playing.* CptRodimus: *Just going to causually sing the lryics* Txen: DS: *not -entirely- sure whether he's being fragged with rn. sniffs at the sword skeptically* Uh... hi there? CptRodimus: *shine shine* FakeProwl: *sits by Soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave tilts his helm at this song* CptRodimus: *seeing the interest Rodimus shifts back to clearlyshow Epip's hilt there is a pretty clearly visuable spark there under armour* Txen: DS: *startles a little bit. does this mean the sword's naked??* Airachnid: [is just going to sit in the back] Sorida changed their nickname to Bee. ItsyBitsySpyers: *He's gonna have to save that last one-- OH a favorite. The tiniest helm bobs.* Bee: [time to sneak in] Airachnid: [?? which Bee is this] CptRodimus: *chuckles* A tad lewd right? He tells me it was all the rage 'back in the day" Bee: (( radioactivibee X3 )) boomtank: -Don't mind Blaster bobbing his helm to the song, as he pokes at his reports- Airachnid: [is just gonna :3c in Bee's direction] Whirl: *trots in* Now, Captain. Captain. I'm not sure when the last time was that you took a good, long look at my magnificent frame, but I've got some news for you. Whirl: I don't have FUR. Windchill: *Looks to verify Whirl's WILD claims.* Txen: DS: *slowly bites and chews snack while he thinks* ...So... you're polishin' an old exhibitionist? *guffaws a little. bipeds are wild* Bruin: *snorting noises from the mech pile in the corner* Whirl: *you'd better not be hogging that couch Windchill* Windchill: *HE TOTES IS MY DUDE.* Bee: [and he's gonna O.o; right back at Airachnid] Windchill: *Guess you'll just have to...teach him a lesson.* Whirl: *he might. First it's time to prod and poke at the snack table* CptRodimus: *bursts out laughing* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Well then. In a mood, are we?]] Whirl: ((my internet is bein a lil fart and i am il, if I vanish my dudes I ran out of stamina to fight it)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((k)) Txen: ((weh ok. be strong, snifs internet)) Bee: ((that's so obnoxious, internet why)) Txen: *predaking definitely has no idea what this song is about* Whirl: *carefully "sniffing" the wares; so far nothing seems worth his time* Windchill, your posture is terrible. You'd better make room before I get over there. Windchill: (( It's okay snif, I still love u. )) Windchill: Make me. Windchill: *Turns just enough to waggle his brows over the back of the couch in CHALLENGE.* boomtank: -okay, going to room watch. More entertaining at this rate- Txen: DS: *remembers he needs to go sit someplace and flops on his belly in an empty floor spot at the front* CptRodimus: "I will surely tell him THAT! Next time I'll skip the sparring so he is up for a movie night." ItsyBitsySpyers: *He knows Rodimus has the hots for his native Prime, but what a series of songs.* Bruin: *Spotter zoops over to the snack table, designated snack getter of the night because no one else can be bothered* CptRodimus: ((MASK?! ItsyBitsySpyers: *Gets comfortable.* ItsyBitsySpyers: ((Yep)) Txen: *heh this is the first time i think missy didnt skip the new intro* Windchill: Cool guys don't look at explosions. *whispers.* Txen: ((AH TWO SECONDS OF MY SON)) Bee: ((ngl i'm trash for the intro remix.....)) CptRodimus: ((on purpose =) boomtank: ...I forgot Optimus got big. Uh...bigger Bee: I forgot Raf's voice dropped that much. CptRodimus: Im ready to receive magnus~ Windchill: *Snorts.* Airachnid: Humans are so fragile. Whirl: *none of this stuff looks like it has any taste, but he's going to grab some engex anyway* Oh lord. This is Magnus all right. ItsyBitsySpyers: //What, ya think I learned to be me offa yours?// CptRodimus: This magnus needs some Rodimus--- Primus damned Bee: ........... CptRodimus: *winks at Bee* Bee: why CptRodimus: *snickers* I work wonders. Whirl: *trots over to the Whirl Couch and stands in front of Windchill* Now, you're lucky that I'm not feeling well tonight, or this would hurt a lot more. FakeProwl: *~Magnus~* FakeProwl: *look at how sensible he is* Airachnid: Prime still looks like a bloated shuttle. Bee: He does not! Whirl: *leanes back, raises one foot up and grasshopper-kicks Windchill right in the dang crotch* Up. Windchill: *SPUTTERS IN PAIN, if not surprise.* Txen: ((lol *** u smokey)) Whirl: *balances one on leg, sipping his Engex calmly* Windchill: Just sit on me, dude. Bee: ...Ratchet. Windchill: *It gon' take more than THAT to move him tonight.* ItsyBitsySpyers: ((whoa what it just skipped like a whole bunch)) FakeProwl: *ugh ugh ugh insecticons* Whirl: You want another? Make room. CptRodimus: *stands up looking his work over and grins with a nod before heading over to put Pip back on this wall mount* boomtank: -huffs- Windchill: Or you could sit on me. *Arches one brow, the other one has been tamed for the time being.* FakeProwl: *leans on soundwave. hi. he wasn't expecting insecticons.* Airachnid: [hisses slightly under her breath] Whirl: *KICKS AGAIN* boomtank: -about as fond of insecticons as Prowl- Txen: ((yes...... bring the fossils to papa)) Windchill: *HOWLS TUNELESSLY.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *YES. Sorry. Mun was preparing to do the Insecticon warning thing but apparently her stream was behind. Sorry Prowl.* Txen: *shockwave is very attentive when the fossil is on screen* FakeProwl: ((no worries, we can say soundwave was distracted)) Windchill: *Sits up though, freeing up maybe 1/3 of the couch.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave will take hand and squeeze if able.* Whirl: *calmly takes a seat, drawing his legs up and curling up* Thanks. FakeProwl: *he'll allow it. ... thanks.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave looks at Shockwave to see what he looks like seeing this fossil search again* Windchill: You're welcome. Whirl: That wasn't so difficult, now was it? *regards him with a half-lidded optic; he seems equal parts amused and tired* Txen: ((god this episode is so referential)) Windchill: No, it kinda was. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Prowl satisfied later tonight. Airachnid: I never understood this logic. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Insecticons not present past evening's content. FakeProwl: @Soundwave «Good to know.» CptRodimus: *struts but to his-- glances at the prowl and soundwave's chair and smirks--- then countinues his trot* Bee: ..........Isn't cloning a clone...not good? Whirl: Like I said--I normally kick a LOT harder than that. *gestures to his head* Migraine. Whirl: Might have saved your crotch's life. FakeProwl: *all right. he's okay now. shall re-establish personal space bubble.* CptRodimus: *watching the CNA explaination then looks to Shockwave then back to the screen as he flops onto the counch* Windchill: Saved the life of something, maybe. Whirl: *snickers and takes a sip* FakeProwl: ((you go starscream, lampshade those scavenger hunts)) Txen: *shockwave is -so attentive. his back isnt even touching the couch.* Bruin: *more snorting noises* Shockwave never lost anything Whirl: You guys' Earth really IS somethin else. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Amused at his primary ally looking more like him for once.* CptRodimus: *nudges DS with a foot* You were a rock? Txen: *its funny how his on-screen alternate says 'CNA' with exactly the same faintly reverent enunciation he does* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[As he has always said.]] CptRodimus: ((is he in nudging range? Txen: ((sure)) Whirl: ((HA)) Airachnid: You are not smooth Prime. Bee: ................ Txen: DS: *wiggles his feet* I was a -fossil-. There's a difference! Windchill: It's  a magical place. boomtank: -giggles- CptRodimus: What is it? boomtank: Optimus, really? Whirl: I sympathize, Wheeljack. *tips his cup to the screen mournfully, and then swivels his helm around to look at Ravage* @Ravage: Hey. So. ItsyBitsySpyers: //Ain't I said we had a hammer?// ItsyBitsySpyers: @Whirl: =Hm?= Txen: DS: Uh... *oops. what does Shockwave say about science stuff again?* Bee: ((noooooo i'm gonna have to miss this fight T.T FakeProwl: *ultra magnus, carrying a hammer that possesses the power to smack complicated machinery into existence* FakeProwl: *... that's a good look on him.* Whirl: @Ravage: Anything left over on my tab? I gave you more'n one of those packages. Seems like a bit of a lopsided deal for a single drink. ItsyBitsySpyers: ((awww i'm sorry bee mun)) Txen: ((also a good look: tfa magnus and his hammer. and shockwave after murdering him and stealin it)) Whirl: ((mmm tfa shockwave)) Bee: ((mmmmmm good stuff right there)) Windchill: (( That butthole. )) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Ravage shakes loose two small shots - all he's carrying on him - and snaps them up in feeler tail claw. Stalks over to deliver* Bee: ...suspenseful theme playing Whirl: *downs his Engex in one go and reached over to take them up in his huge claw* Thanks. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Gonna park here by Whirl and Windchill. Lazy cat.* Whirl: *e's gonna pour the shots into the empty glass and nurse it* Txen: Shockwave: *supplies for Rodimus once DS looks at him helplessly* Preserved remnants of ancient life forms. Airachnid: [all of the sentimental stuff mentioned is still making her sick, ew modesty] Windchill: *Squints at Ravage a little.* Whirl: ... *scoots over to make room, if Ravage desires; this, of course, puts him in an oh-so-convenient position to lean on Windchill* Txen: (( OwO )) Whirl: ((YEEEEE YE)_) CptRodimus: ... Hey, noseless guys can your hands turn into -other- things? *looks back to SHck* Thanks! Txen: ((I FORGOT ABOUT THAT PARTICULAR PART)) Bee: No. Whirl: Ha! Damn. Windchill: *Consider yourself lucky you're his friend WHIRL.* Txen: ((HIS TANK MODE HAS A JET PACK)) Bee: I mean, Arcee had some blades but I didn't have any melee weapons ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It depends on the mech.]] Whirl: *laughs again* I didn't know Shockwave could fly. Airachnid: Prime used to be able to make his arms into blades. boomtank: ..... Bee: ((ugh i gotta go T.T may be back.....)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave abruptly sits up a bit* Windchill: *RAISES HIS HAND.* Mine don't anymore. FakeProwl: ... *questioning look at Soundwave's hands* Airachnid: Apparently the Forge is not fond of arm blades. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[These,]] pointing to the screen [[were his last moments as a Decepticon.]] Txen: Shockwave: ...It is not sustained flight. FakeProwl: *oh. never mind. focuses on screen.* CptRodimus: *snrks* Whirl: Still. a flying tank. Never thought I'd see the day. Txen: Shockwave: *why do people always go for his helm.......* Shockbox changed their nickname to shockbox. shockbox: (( soundwave saving shockwave is pretty gay tbh.)) Whirl: ((i love it)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Bird chitters noisily. Her time to shine soon* boomtank: Disable the helm, disable the mech Whirl: Whoa. That knocked him OUT? boomtank: Good strategy...if it works Airachnid: It's also a very big and obvious target. ItsyBitsySpyers: {{Bird said!}} ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Blades. Other hands. Nothing else. Yet. Whirl: Nice moves, mech. boomtank: That too Windchill: *Snickers.* Txen: ((boop)) FakeProwl: *small nod. blades makes sense. he's sorta blade-shaped.* CptRodimus: Niiiiiiiiice Whirl: Pfft! Txen: ((how long was megatron waiting there to catch it)) Whirl: Damn, you guys are all showing off tonight. FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... OTHER hands?» *why do your hands turn into more hands* ItsyBitsySpyers: ((is it skipping super bad for anyone else)) FakeProwl: ((it's okay here)) Windchill: (( I haven't noticed anything. )) boomtank: ((it's all good here Airachnid: same)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((hmm. thank you)) Whirl: ((ye, it's workin fine.. sorry neddles :<)) Txen: ((ahh. a good ep for good boys)) CptRodimus: SO--- Shockwave, about that CNA you wanted. FakeProwl: ((*smacks forge on cro's internet*)) Txen: Shockwave: ...Yes? ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): When deployers dock, hands: modified. Palm, extra digit, extra joints, sharper claws. Whirl: They just LEFT him there? Harsh. Windchill: Happened to me, once. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Other hands. Whirl: And kinda stupid. FakeProwl: *ah. nods.* ItsyBitsySpyers: ((brb i'm gonna restart stream and see if it helps)) Windchill: *One gets used to it.* CptRodimus: *rubs chin* Can it come with a no cloning clause? ItsyBitsySpyers: ((kk back. let's see how my computer does now)) Whirl: ((WORK, I COMMAND U)) CptRodimus: And he is better at ice than you warm-only mecha. Txen: Shockwave: Yes. *most people with sense share the concern, though it is in this case unwarranted... and wouldnt stop him if he WERE up to something* shockbox: (( they could've given starscream a care guide or something.)) Whirl: Oh, lord. *swivels his helm to look at Predaking* I am so sorry that they made you work under HIM. FakeProwl: *Shockwave is inordinately fond of the word "logical" and its variations.* Airachnid: So far, that's the only thing I agree with. FakeProwl: *he's used it four times in two episodes, that Prowl noticed* Airachnid: [don't remind her] Windchill: *Snorts in approval.* Bruin: ((hell my internet is pitching a *** fiit, i blame the weather, see yall next week)) Txen: ((writers are silly and dont know other words to give him :') )) boomtank: Wheeljack. No. ItsyBitsySpyers: ((bye bruin ;; )) Whirl: ((sorry dude D: )) FakeProwl: ((night)) Windchill: (( Bye! )) Airachnid: Except when you move the rocks. FakeProwl: ((writers are very silly)) boomtank: Or tehy don't need to Whirl: *if Ravage is not going to take the spot on the couch, Whirl's gonna stretch out his legs* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Nah, Ravage likes where he is. But thank you.* boomtank: *they Windchill: *You stretch them drumsticks, boy.* Whirl: *but of course; he does so. Drumsticks away* Windchill: WHAT. boomtank: ....... Airachnid: Really? boomtank: WHEELJACK ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You've met him, haven't you?]] Txen: Predaking: *sneering a little at the screen* As was Starscream. Windchill: *Sighs, it was just getting good.* CptRodimus: Falm--- Yes. Whirl: *snickers* I can see that, Airachnid: At least the Predacon has a decent reconition of authority, and how Starscream ISN'T that. Windchill: *Wheezing sounds.* Whirl: Yeah. Good instincts. Txen: Predaking: *low, -low- chuckle* Whirl: Lord, why would they even bother making HIM the leader of the Wreckers? The whole point of the Wreckers is to do whatever you HAVE to to get the job done. CptRodimus: *oh yes growl and scowl dissapprovingly again* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They did have a higher survival rate with him in charge.]] CptRodimus: *fufufu* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They also had a higher desertion rate.]] boomtank: .... Whirl: I'll bet they didn't accomplish half of the scrap WE did, either. *snorts and takes a slow sip* Whirl: *but enough grumbling, he is eager to see this dragon fellow fight again* Txen: ((lmao i heard prowl)) CptRodimus: ((stfu prowl)) FakeProwl: ((prowl was just trying to helpfully keep you updated on your discord chat)) Windchill: *Shudders. NOPE.* ItsyBitsySpyers: //That ain't what he meant.// CptRodimus: ((he was telling be about the most effiecent way of dealing dmg* FakeProwl: ((important intel from the head autobot strategist)) Airachnid: Oh shut up Starscream. Windchill: (( Oh god this episode. )) Whirl: *snickers again* Windchill: Mistakes were made. FakeProwl: *decepticon high command is an absolute wreck* CptRodimus: ((it is doesnt have ventalation i dont think rodimus could wear that ItsyBitsySpyers: *Most of it.* Airachnid: [yes, yes it is] Whirl: *ugh. Stupid Magnus. How dare he be so good with a hammer* FakeProwl: *not just starscream. starscream is far more a symptom than the cause* Txen: ((JACKIES FACE)) boomtank: ....... Txen: ((u tried jackie)) Whirl: !!! C'mon, c'mon... Windchill: Well that's creepy. Whirl: Damn. FakeProwl: ((i'm sure it does have ventilation. starscream didn't take it off because he was actually hot, he took it off because he wanted to pretend he wasn't scared of PK)) FakeProwl: ((it'd be a cruddy piece of armor if it overheats you)) Whirl: Yes! Windchill: It's about time. FakeProwl: ... It's compatible with /humans/? Whirl: *tips his glass in a toast to Miko; best human* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Apparently.]] Airachnid: Which I do not understand. CptRodimus: Dont need a spark apparetnly Windchill: They're like distant cousins, I suppose. boomtank: So it has to have vents Windchill: Might as well. FakeProwl: Why and how did your universe manage to make a suit of armor that's compatible with organic aliens? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They -are- from a world of Unicron's shell, and he is Cybertronian. Perhaps there is something recognizable about them.]] Whirl: Maybe it's got something to do with Unicron. FakeProwl: Hm. boomtank: Otherwise the human would suffocate FakeProwl: ... The Nemesis didn't recognize them. ItsyBitsySpyers: //That's a good point, the human not chokin'.// Whirl: *snickering* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[The Nemesis was specifically set not to search for anything except inorganics.]] Whirl: The Nemesis isn't an artifact, though--wasn't the Apex Armor from the Primes? Whirl: Or something? FakeProwl: Mm. Windchill: That's a fair point. CptRodimus: Burn! Airachnid: [LAUGHTER] Whirl: Haha! Windchill: *Gets distracted.* Windchill: The Nemisis is Trypticon, who has no reason to recognize humans... Whirl: *sits up eagerly* boomtank: ...wow Txen: Predaking: *hasnt spent much time with the humans, but this one spits fire* Whirl: (9SHE FIGHTS LIKE A WRESTLER)) Whirl: Look at that little Wrecker GO. Whirl: ((Look at those proud dads)) Txen: ((black sheep uncles at it again...)) boomtank: Safe to say most humans aren't like here, right? boomtank: *her Txen: ((ok i hate silasdown but this episode has some really good jokes with KO)) boomtank: ((gdi brain is off boomtank: ((like whoa ItsyBitsySpyers: ((silasdown is next, this is flirty ko)) Airachnid: yeah that's next ep friendo)) ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He doesn't know. None of the others ever got their fleshy hands on the Apex Armor.]] FakeProwl: *and in that moment, Prowl empathized completely with Ratchet* Windchill: Brilliant ItsyBitsySpyers: *Only now?* boomtank: True, true Txen: *one wonders how they managed to bridge perfectly into a circle of foes* CptRodimus: One more for the night then Ima going to go--- spar my conjunx. *grin* Airachnid: [can't help but chinhand, he's so cute when he talks science] boomtank: ....I did meet a human with other abilities once FakeProwl: *this is the first time Ratchet said he didn't want to abandon a complex equation to venture outside his comfort zone* boomtank: Called himself a 'Green Lantern' Txen: (jackie wins diaperyest butt)) ItsyBitsySpyers: //Sparrin', huh? That whatcha callin' it these days?// Windchill: (( It sure is a diaper butt. )) FakeProwl: ((you're right)) Whirl: ((omfg)) Whirl: *snickers* boomtank: ((can't unsee that now Windchill: *Raises brow too.* Whirl: ((also may I say: JEFFREY! COMBS...)) Airachnid: same tbh)) FakeProwl: *squints at the screen. squints very hard* Windchill: *Taps his claws against his lower lip.* boomtank: ...? CptRodimus: *snickers* Sparring. FakeProwl: ... Are the adult humans flirting. Windchill: Fascinating. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Glances over. Curious ping.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Yes.]] CptRodimus: One is Windchill: Oh, look who can count. Whirl: *snickers again* Txen: Skylynx: *snorts* FakeProwl: *HAH. satisfied nod. figured it out on aliens, no less.* Txen: ((lots of glorious mandible dragon)) Whirl: I never really get tired of seeing Starscream get pushed around. Airachnid: Perhaps you shouldn't anger the giant creaute that can easily destroy equipment Starscream. Whirl: ((Predaking is fantastic <3)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Irritated vent. He may not be a Decepticon, but that was still HIS communications equipment once upon a time* ItsyBitsySpyers: *At least he wasn't there for that.* Windchill: Oh my god. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Rumble cackles* Whirl: !!! Whirl: HEY. FakeProwl: Pff. Whirl: I guess me and the sassy one have similar taste in nicknames. CptRodimus: *snickers* Windchill: *Cackles.* Txen: *if it helps, he MEANT to hit the dish. and it played a part in him becoming a destabilizing force for the cons later on* Txen: ((wow miko u shipper)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Lil bit.* Airachnid: Likewise. Txen: ((i love you ko....... so much)) Windchill: Good grief. Whirl: I mean, there are more disgusting things. CptRodimus: *laughs reminds him of Drift's opion on that* FakeProwl: ((he's a treasure)) Whirl: Like imagining Starscream interfacing. Whirl: ((he is indeed)) ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Why, Whirl. Why.]] Whirl: It was the most disgusting thing I could think of! Windchill: Congratulations, you sicko. Airachnid: Well, Whirl isn't wrong. boomtank: ............... FakeProwl: *imagines. ... mentally shrugs.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Somewhere, Ratbat is laughing.* CptRodimus: *pscyically shrugs* FakeProwl: ... How thick is his upholstery if he couldn't feel them crawling out of the back? Whirl: *nods decisively and takes another long sip, savoring the flavor* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It's very plush.]] Windchill: That question sounded wrong, you know? boomtank: Apparently very thick CptRodimus: You tested the pushing Soundwave? CptRodimus: :3c ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Don't be ridiculous. Knock Out bragged.]] Whirl: Yeah, you seem really interested in his interior, prowl. *shoots him a sly look* FakeProwl: He probably installed genuine leather, didn't he. He seems the type. boomtank: Bragged about his seats? CptRodimus: Why-- I'd test it-- if I could gag him. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Bragged about his everything.]] boomtank: Ah boomtank: Seems the type Airachnid: He's the type of mecha that brags about literally anything about himself. boomtank: Really boomtank: ? boomtank: ((Raaaaaf ItsyBitsySpyers: [[His voice is acceptable.]] CptRodimus: *thumbs up* If you got it. Flaunt it Whirl: I like his attitude. CptRodimus: His jokes arent. Only one mech doing those puns allowed! Windchill: Lies. Whirl: Yeah,, you should hear the bad puns that come cracking out of THIS one. *elbows Windchill* boomtank: ...why didn't they have Soundwave do it in the first place? Windchill: *Grins. he's not ashamed.* CptRodimus: Desk mech boomtank: I mean, that's his system set up ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He doesn't know. He was not told when he acquired the footage.]] Whirl: I'm guessing Starscream didn't tell anyone until he had to. Windchill: Probably. boomtank: I'd be pissed if someone messed around with mine boomtank: Weren't you? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Always.]] Txen: Shockwave: Whirl is correct. He wished to avoid the involvement of parties who were likely to report to Megatron. Airachnid: [grumbles at the sight of the Insecticons being terminated] Txen: Shockwave: *just because he was in his lab doesnt mean he didnt -pay attention-* FakeProwl: *ghhh. insecticons.* Windchill: *Frowns.* ItsyBitsySpyers: ((lord i'm failing all the insect moments tonight i'm sorry)) FakeProwl: ((it's okay. we'll call it accidental exposure therapy.)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((pffft.)) boomtank: ((poor prowl CptRodimus: Now its two ItsyBitsySpyers: *Logs Shockwave's explanation* ItsyBitsySpyers: //Two what?// Windchill: Pffft. CptRodimus: Two flirting ItsyBitsySpyers: //Ohhh, heh. Yeah.// boomtank: /really/ boomtank: ..... CptRodimus: Thats it~ Whirl: Pfft. What an idiot. Shockwave--did you KNOW from the get-go that the Preds would be sapient when you cloned 'em? ItsyBitsySpyers: ((aw, rats. okay)) Whirl: ((only three?)) boomtank: ((aww FakeProwl: *... he destroyed it JUST so that he could get to see Starscream's access code as it rebooted? unexpectedly devious. prowl approves.* Windchill: (( Good I was gonna say I might pee myself if I have to sit through Thirst tonight. )) CptRodimus: ((lol three is all we do every week Whirl: ((No, we always do four, dude)) Airachnid: really? felt like two)) FakeProwl: ((three to four. on very rare occasions, five.)) Txen: ((we usually do 4 but have been doing 3 lately :') )) boomtank: I think he just disproved Starscream there Whirl: ((okee dokee!)) CptRodimus: ((Well i need dinner and if we watch anoter its going be 12 before I get food FakeProwl: ((I'm fine ending here tonight)) Whirl: ((By all means! Go get yo dinner >8V FakeProwl: ((that means next week we get to start off with the best episode)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((...that means if everyone has straws on sunday this episode is gonna be really funny the next night.)) boomtank: ((HAH boomtank: ((don't think they'll look at straws the same again ItsyBitsySpyers: ((well, not funny, per se, but ooc the timing is, to me.)) Whirl: ((whirl still has no idea why Rodimus called him furry)) CptRodimus: *stretches* CptRodimus: ((mmmmmmmmmhahaha ItsyBitsySpyers: *In any case. Soundwave finally - FINALLY - gets something right and pings Prowl a warning.* CptRodimus: ((its ok rodimus is a well known xeno-*** Txen: Shockwave: *quiet for a moment. answering these things is always a little touchy when Predaking is present* Little direct information was available regarding Predacon abilities until they were cloned. FakeProwl: *... is the warning for next week. did you warn him a week early* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Soundwave, accidental liar. Early tape termination unexpected. First tape next session, last Insecticon appearances. Airachnid: you can never be too prepared Prowl)) FakeProwl: *it's a week early. he'll take it. nods.* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): ...This one suspects Prowl enjoys reason. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Stretches* Whirl: *nods* CptRodimus: *considering the room* FakeProwl: *oh? curious glance.* @Soundwave «I'll look forward to it.» Whirl: And did YOU always know how to access your bot mode? Just decided not to? *looks to Predaking* Windchill: (( Jfc I forgot the next few episodes Chill's going to get worked UP. )) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Suspicious look at Rodimus considering the room like that. What is he up to* CptRodimus: *:3* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Is he playing more lewd songs* boomtank: -oh. Right. Preds are in the room. Oops- Whirl: ((OHH BOY)) Txen: Predaking: *was still contemplating the screen. glances over and shakes his helm solemnly* No. When I first awoke, I possessed little more than natural instinct. Windchill: (( WHAT WHAT'S HAPPENIN )) Whirl: *nods; interesting* I'm glad your path to self-discovery was one long sequence of moments where you made Starscream's life difficult. Whirl: ((I was saying that in prep for Windchill gettin bothered)) CptRodimus: Like any true forgling. Windchill: (( OH DERP. Not the hot and bothered kind WE HOPE. )) CptRodimus: *stands and stretches bouncing out some extra energy* Txen: Predaking: *snorts quietly and smirks a bit* I would go on to do more than that. *waves a claw in the direction of his gouged-out optic* FakeProwl: *prowl is really starting to be unable to stand this song* Windchill: (( Assuming I make it next week that is, schedule's still out. >:U )) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave's not sure what he was expecting from that :3 face.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *This seems... relatively safe* Whirl: Nice! I look forward to seeing that. Windchill: *STRETCHES, leans on Whirl a little.* CptRodimus: ((I only got 28 sings rn TnT the only pc had 200 rodimus songs CptRodimus: ((old* Whirl: *leans back* Next week, presumably, my processor won't feel like it got smashed by the Magnus hammer, so you'd better not make me kick you. Windchill: That sounds like a challenge. Windchill: Or a threat, maybe. Windchill: I think you'll find I respond very well to threats. ItsyBitsySpyers: ((oh i don't mind, i was just like. worried the couches were gonna drop again or something lmao)) CptRodimus: ...WOuldnt you LIKE it if Magnus''s hammer hit you? Whirl: Mostly a warning. Whirl: Not in the crotch, I wouldn't. Windchill: Really? CptRodimus: *helm tilt* Thats a weakness? Windchill: It's almost like you don't love me anymore. Txen: ((SAME CRO)) boomtank: ((plz don't drop the couches again FakeProwl: ((i was expecting increasingly lewd songs tbh)) Windchill: *Drapes his arm over his face dramatically, what happened to the mech who's bed he dented?* CptRodimus: ((lol rodimus was seeing if there was a lap he wanted to try to crawl into CptRodimus: ((I ran out of ideas lol ItsyBitsySpyers: ((every single person on this couch would have been horrified lmao)) Txen: ((predakings lap is empty but i Do Not Recommend)) Sorida changed their nickname to Bee. boomtank: ((this Blaster is too small for that Whirl: ((perch upon the Predathrone Rodders)) Bee: ((dang did i miss everything? XD)) Bee: ((.........leave predaking's lap empty 2k17)) Whirl: I mean, it doesn't feel GREAT, Captain. FakeProwl: ((a room full of totally ill-suited laps)) Airachnid: yeah pretty much)) CptRodimus: ((At least Preds by find a bot the same heat/hotter than him interesting? Whirl: And I do it BECAUSE I care, Windchill. What else are friends for, if not kicking each other in the junk? Whirl: (HAHA WHAT TIMING BEE)) ItsyBitsySpyers: *Frenzy's tired. He trudges over to Soundwave and flicks his assigned arm to signal a dock request. Soundwave nods, and very shortly, has one randomly shorter and thicker arm because why not.* Bee: ((END ME...)) CptRodimus: I know some mechs into that actually. Windchill: ...Sounds like I've been slacking on my end, what with all that kicking I haven't been doing. Windchill: One day, you'll get your comeuppance. Whirl: I'm sure there are. Everything is somebody's something. Whirl: One day. But it is not this day. CptRodimus: If it exsist someones got a thing for it CptRodimus: ((youtube these ads are keeping bad Windchill: Sure, I'll go easy on you since you have a headache. Airachnid: Ah yes, I love this song. boomtank: ...... Whirl: *snickers* Txen: *shockwave casually watches to inspect the docking sequence. good, everything still seems to be working as intended* Bee: ..So that's where the meme comes from. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Yep. Even tired, all is 100% well.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Perhaps he should make a short night of it. Much to... think about. Before next week.]] CptRodimus: Whats next week? Whirl: You can just admit you're intimidated by me, Windchill. It's all right. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[If he told you, we wouldn't need to see it.]] Windchill: Me, lie? Windchill: Never. FakeProwl: *half-watches. other hand.* Whirl: If by "never" you mean, "right now." boomtank: That's ominous Txen: *expects no less from his own work, but thats no reason not to remain vigilant for unexpected complications* Windchill: Ding dong, you're wrong. Whirl: *streeetches slowly, mking sure to leverage his weight back on Windchill as much as possible* All right. I'm out. Later, losers. Windchill: I'll beat you up right now if that's what you want. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Farewell, Whirl. And if it sounds ominous, it should.]] Windchill: Or, later. boomtank: G'night Whirl Bee: ...Omninous isn't good. Whirl: *bobs his helm to Soundwave and go, and elbows Windchill one last time* Later. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave nods to both companions and rises, gesturing for the others to hurry up and dock.* Windchill: Bye, sucker. boomtank: ...right then Txen: (augh guys im gonna dip out too, i have some chores i need to get done before bed and i wanna get caught up on replies)) Whirl: *also bobs his head to Blaster, and to Airachnid... and Shockwave, and the Preds* Whirl: *he's got so many people to bob to these days* CptRodimus: ((rosimus asked sound a question ItsyBitsySpyers: ((soundwave answered!)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((look two below your question)) CptRodimus: ((got it! FakeProwl: *stands as well* CptRodimus: Oh. just the vids. I already seen it. Airachnid: [is just going to leave as well, she's getting bored] Bee: ((whelp g'night everyone, been fun. XD)) Windchill: *Stretches now that he has more couch to himself!* ItsyBitsySpyers: *....Nods. Don't say anything yet, Rodimus.* Txen: Shockwave: Fare well. *will have to spend a few moments corralling the predacons before they can go* boomtank: -Stands as well- G'night, and thanks for the vids CptRodimus: *his wings are the only spoilers allowed* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Once everyone's collected, Soundwave pings the room goodnight, and heads home. Those claws may be twitching slightly on his way out.* boomtank: ((thanks for the stream! Windchill: *How long can he nap before someone chases him home? LET'S FIND OUT.* CptRodimus: *smirks lewdly-- then sudden;y sighs and flops back onto his couch to sulk a little before pulling out a datapad* CptRodimus: *who else is still here he glances over his datapad light from a vid lighting up his faceplates* Windchill: *Is here drooling.* FakeProwl: *hasn't left quite yet* FakeProwl: *... eye of the tiger came on* Windchill: *Always a good reason to hang out.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave would've approved if he was still here.* CptRodimus: *slightly turns up what he is watching straining will make it out now* Windchill: *Well that's an ungodly racket there, isn't it.* Windchill: *It's enough to wake the dead, or him at least.* CptRodimus: *its pornz btw* Windchill: *Nice.* Windchill: *He sits up with a groan, and wipes his face. Short nap = good, now it's time to go back home and WORK.* FakeProwl: *prowl is going to interpret that as a "get out of the room" sign— dammit rodimus* Windchill: Ugh, bye you losers. FakeProwl: *you can't go "get out of the room" with your porn and then put on the Eagles.* Windchill: I'm out. *Creaks to his feet, and shuffles out.* CptRodimus: *its two types of pronz he'd make sweet love with engles on* CptRodimus: ((engle omg FakeProwl: *well who wouldn't.* CptRodimus: See ya CptRodimus: *flips his datapad over and just offlines his optics and lets his helm fall back as he listens* FakeProwl: *he's stuck here til the end of the song. might as well sit again.* CptRodimus: Eagles are pretty great. FakeProwl: *is rodimus talking to him? ... he's the only one here. apparently so.* They are. CptRodimus: You get a copy of the Cybertorian remaster greatest hits yet? FakeProwl: No. I just recorded them off the radio. CptRodimus: Ask one of the green squad I got it--- I found--- gdi I dataswapped and a con and that encoded. They should beable to find a copy of that remaster not encoding in--- well that data. *grins* FakeProwl: On Earth? I don't think they're still in communication with any 'Cons that were on Earth. ... Or anyone else, for that matter. CptRodimus: I got it on Earth before hte war ended. CptRodimus: That con didnt make it pass Dark Cybertron otherwise I'd ask him for the clean copy. CptRodimus: *sorta a lie...* CptRodimus: *oh well Prowl doesnt care* CptRodimus: I know someone gota have a clean copy of it somewhere. And I cant go asking without the looks, Drift not going to want me getting. So *finger points* If you find a clean copy I'm interested! FakeProwl: I'll let you know if I find one. It might be on the B.C. CptRodimus: ((bc? FakeProwl: ((Big Conversation. decepticon facebook. the Constructicons are all on.)) CptRodimus: ((prefect! thats what I was thinking! CptRodimus: ((meanwhile rodimsu got too relaxed and early walked into admited he hardlined with a con mid war oopies FakeProwl: ((prowl assumes he's talking about 'facing with a Con during the time they were cooperating on building that shuttle)) FakeProwl: ((rn he's trying to mentally cross-reference "Cons that were working on the shuttle" and "Cons that died during Dark Cybertron" and not coming up with any names)) CptRodimus: ((that what rodimus was covering it too even if it was a on coming f*ck0buddy thing CptRodimus: ((Since the Con wasnt on earth during that time CptRodimus: ((But he had been on earth breifly before FakeProwl: ((rn Prowl's #1 suspect is Skywarp. He didn't die during DC, but he came out of it severely weakened.)) CptRodimus: ((close same alt mode CptRodimus: ((and skywarp fits Rodimus's taste CptRodimus: ((looks wise CptRodimus: ((let me know if you want to know if you dont already xD FakeProwl: ((prowl's thinking "yeah... they're just obnoxious enough to match each other")) FakeProwl: ((go head.)) FakeProwl: ((top suspect is sunstorm)) CptRodimus: ((Sunstorm CptRodimus: ((yeppers CptRodimus: ((I wanted one i could line up and move around mid war and it not really matter FakeProwl: ((gad, and they're both nyon survivors)) CptRodimus: (also they had a breif encounter right before the LL left, native Drift wasnt pleased.  But sunstorm was way into wanting to play out a prime and his seeker kink and roddy contently indulged YEP Smokescreee: FRAG IT'S MONDAY FakeProwl: ... You missed it. FakeProwl: !!! Smokescreee: i missed everything CptRodimus: *startles* FakeProwl: ((those were backwards, cmon LS)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((LMFAO)) Smokescreee: How much did I miss? CptRodimus: You want a copy? CptRodimus: Three of them Smokescreee: Yeah! That'd be good! Smokescreee: I mean- I lived through it, but seeing what the 'cons were up to is fun. CptRodimus: Whats your nurolink id? CptRodimus: ...You guys got those? FakeProwl: *tries to tune smokescreen out and focus to Boston* CptRodimus: There was alot of con parts Smokescreee: That? Not exactly-- there's probably an equivalent, though. Smokescreee: Oh, really? ... How embarrassing was I? CptRodimus: You were fine. CptRodimus: Mostly is was dragons and Starscream being... himself. FakeProwl: *and Knock Out being handsome. ... Prowl's keeping that observation to himself.* CptRodimus: Even ours is more competant. *stands up and overs a personal cable to smokey.* You may want to sit to data transfer with me. *he kneels over a table and starts going threw a crate* Smokescreee: /Hey Smokescreen would shamelessly agree that Knock Out is handsome in these/ Smokescreee: Yeaaahh, Starscream's a mess. I'm glad he's not around where I am whenever I rewatch this stuff. And- wait, really? /And he's going to go ahead and sit down before plugging that into himself./ CptRodimus: !! CptRodimus: *dont think dont think dont think* CptRodimus: *pulls out a inbetweener Rodimus cant control his data speeds.. muc to his embrassment* CptRodimus: *just going to gently unplug you there smokey we dont want to fry you today yes?* Smokescreee: /Oh dangit- Smokescreen was going to try to think about some songs he's been tricked with/ CptRodimus: *just going to try to guilty hide the device from Prowl* Smokescreee: /But not being fried sounds pretty good to him!/ CptRodimus: *ok ther in .4 sec all the vides to this point* FakeProwl: *no worries, Prowl's barely paying attention. he's listening to the music.* FakeProwl: *he's vaguely aware that they're hardlining. But Kansas is on.* CptRodimus: *unplugs and pats Smokey's head* There you go! CptRodimus: ((its just boring kind Smokescreee: /Whoaaaa-- that's a pretty good use! Smokescreen's trying to think of anything he can provide in return- and then Rodimus unplugs./ Smokescreee: Thanks! I'll have to get something for you next time. FakeProwl: ((it's more boring than Kansas, that's all Prowl's concerned about.)) CptRodimus: *smiles then winks* You can trade me later with more flair~ CptRodimus: ((now THAT is sexy hardline offer Smokescreee: /Winking back/ Dunno if I can have as much flair as you! You're the one with flames here, after all CptRodimus: *lols* It's true. Must be hard to have to live up to the little bro. CptRodimus: OK! Now I gota get to work before Drift steals all of it. So if I want my heatsink tonight I gota beat him to my piles of pads! Smokescreee: Hey- I'm pretty sure I can match, though. I've got my own racing stripes here- and phase shifter's got its own flair! CptRodimus: It does!!1 I wanta see that once I finish getting this ship up and moving Smokescreee: Have a good night, then! Get that heatsink! CptRodimus: *snickers* I will FakeProwl: *prowl's pretty sure this means the music is over* CptRodimus: *nods to Prowl* FakeProwl: *that's fine. looks like the playlist has started repeating anyway. Rodimus doesn't have enough songs.* CptRodimus: *its sad* FakeProwl: *nods back* FakeProwl: *flickers and disappears*