#im like the dudes in the bg like holy shit pretty girl!!!

[okiankeno]

I'm going to pass out from how attractive angela is in her. last Instagram story holy shit

[badanimereviews]

Summer 2019 anime: what to watch

This season is going to be so bloody awesome I can already tell, there’s a lot of very unique & exciting shows that I can’t wait for omgggg

Arifureta Shokugyou de Sekai Saikyou

I don’t usually include images but I think I’ll start to just cause I wanna show off.... how..... so pretty and aesthetic this cover is like holy crap? it’s really nice. the character designs looks very well-done and the art style is very nice and clean. Let’s talk about the premise too: a whole class getting isekai’d. apparently it’s not just me who’s had dreams of their whole class getting transported to a fantasy world? also this one power this mc guy has i swear it’ll end up being super op or so help me god. i love isekai anime and as a genre so ofc im watching this, even so, i bet this one will be really good. 

Cop Craft

dunno how i really feel about this one but i’ll check it out just cuz ive got nothing better to do :/ i’m digging the girl, tirana- she looks pretty yo but why are there pompoms on her outfit it ruins the vibe also the guy is too old for my tastes so i feel that might ruin this show for me. i’m getting Gate vibes

Dr Stone

decided to check it out cuz that AMAZING bg art like HOLY FUCK! it’s super nice but then I saw the cover art on MAL and it looked ugly and shounen? i don’t know what to believe but like, it could be pretty cool. and creepy and i like science stuff bc aesthetic or whatever 

Danmachi s2: it’s danmachi what else do i gotta say i loved it, and sword oratoria too, i played the game, s1 ended on a cliffhanger, let’s go boiz

Enen no Shouboutai

why do i get ditf vibes from this? i hate those costumes? but the art style is cool? and it could be pretty interesting?

Granbelm

lolis! magic! what more do u need! premise doesn’t give much info but still thought i’d check it out, tho from the 2 covers i saw it looks mecha... even tho the tags said it’s magic... anyhow, i am digging the art style, it’s clean, cutesy, don’t think this show will be powerful or anything but could be fun

Isekai Cheat Magician

the title fuckin says it all, my dudes. there ya go. even so, it is isekai therefore i must at least try it. character designs are nice. first character impressions are boring mc guy, white haired bird girl is annoying as fuck, everyone else is a tsundere. even so i am tryna be hopeful so! i love magic shit!

Kanata no Astra

i already hate the girl with the puppet. also the premise givin me lost in space vibes... i hate space with a passion but i love a good survival story so if the characters aren’t a bunch of little bitches then i’ll watch it. art style is kinda meh, character designs.... honestly not too keen on them but whatever.

To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts

can i scream briefly? i just read this entire manga series and didn’t think it was popular enough to get an anime anytime soon but here we are? i am so pumped to watch this? the manga is so good? it’s so good? i am so excited i can’t stop using question marks? WHTA THE FUCK I AM SO ESXCAUAT excited OMy god!!!!!! i love nancy! mappa don’t do her dirty! don’t do hank dirty! they deserve better! this is so good and i am glad a good studio gets to animate it! although.... the manga’s art style is so much more stylistic and nice to look at but it looks too different and sucky here so i am a little sad but this is only the cover art. holy fuck it’s actually getting an anime yas! this is so good i can’t say it enough oml

Naka no Hito Genome

i rly like this art style. character designs are rly nice too. this sounds p interesting actually i like game anime and i like making up game-based stories too so i can’t wait to see how this will play out... haha... pun... cuz gamers... play... haha...

Vinland Saga

never read the manga even tho i saw it in the library so often, but since anime is easier for me to eat up i decided to try it! i love history and i love viking stuff too so i hope this will be up my alley

Bem

the art style looks cool. i will try this out.. tho that premise? sounds rly weird? but intriguing enough. i hope it won’t be one of those super edgy confusing as shit things cuz then imma drop it. im not smart enough to watch heavy anime and play love nikki at the same time ok

there’s also the accelerator anime coming out too but i’m not caught up on index so imma pass for now

anyways in summary, this season is gonna be swole as shit and fricken amazing i don’t care what anyone says there are actually so many good shows airing this season and a bunch of awesome leftovers too so lets get this fuckin bread

[photonconductor]

i dont have an ao3 but shout out to my homeboys

once upon there was a gay on th e moon bc of a really lovng alternate au idea where elc turened BAD and klaus had a 1000 year nap and it'd take too long to fucking explain this so just roll with it ok. this gay--its elcrest btw hes also a Bad Boy now; he rly likes hot topic and thinks those t shirts with sarcastic sayings are actually rly funny but we all know they aren't--was feleing emo bc he couldn't see his bf xen o bc he betrayed him. so he stayed in his room whining abt how fgay he was until eve showed up

"hey whats wrong elc mother is here for u" even tho shes like 5000 years old and looks like shes 2 and also a rock (but im not rockist guys i promise). elc looked at her with his optics shining in the pale argentate light. good thing hes the seme here bc otherwise he'd start crying. in reality he rly wanted to fucking bone xeno bc obviously they had a lot of gay sex b4 they tried to kkill his mom once nad staring at rocks all day kinda sucks.

a;so burnign alive but hes kind of over that phase.

"im sad my bf left me for 1000 years can i pls go back to earth my raging hard on can't be satisfied bc rocks. my dicks not a jack hammer even tho im jacking it all the time (thats what guys do right bitch i dont know)" eve was so offended she put her hands on her giant rock self thats not just herself. its rly fucking complicated shut up u came here for the gay sex not instructibles on how physical forms manifest.

"we dont say ROCKS in this household young man!!!!"

"ＢＵＴ ＭＯＯＯＭＭＭＭＭ sorry i forgot to turn off my seme voice lemme adjust my mic it happens when my dick is hard" elcrest coughed twice "ok sounds good, BUT MOM I RLY NEED TO NUT. YOU KNOW NUT I'M SAYING... ITS ALL OR NUTTING BUT MOSTLY NUTTING IN XENO'S SWEET HOT BUNS"

"stop talking abt nuts u disgusting boy fine, god, if u leave me alone u gaylord"

and then eve punched him so hard in the dick that elcrest landed on earth in a giatn crater. how hes still alive is bc he still had some continues left like in mario even though this is a srpg game. once elc recovered he struck a pose and laughed evilly while twirling his mustache.

"finally...... I have RETURNED for xeno's hot man breasts! the world cannot stop me now!!" he cackly cackkled and quickly ripped off the fake mustache he put on just for this one scene. then elc went on a quest to find where klaus was and bc the author is too lazy to write any tansitional scenes.

elc found him chilling in his bed reading a book that was called Sweets and You: Do sweets make u inherantly Gay? elcrest made the PFFT noise. ofc they make u gay, fuckiing idiot book. he could write better than that author. in fact, elcrest was gonna do that when he got home bc obviously if this trash is published any shit elc wrote would be good.

NO! he had to focus! but he couldnt stop staring at xenos man boobs and felt his dick get hard again. elc got a nose bleed too bc thats what happens in anime right. i played persona 4 i know what im about

"damn u xeno." elc said thru his nosebleed and klaus looked up bc the author cant fucking rmemeber who is klaus and who is xeno and was surprised i remmebred his name but could not remember remember the 5th of novemember

"what"

"XENO IT IS I" since h e was caught red handed he just kickflipped through the window anyway. he did a sick flip then stood in the middle of klauses room. klaus made a gay gaspp

"alto! what are u doing hre!?" klaus said, bc in this AU that was his codename. elc wanted to be currently doing that but eve said no. fuck his mom. except please dont bc i know you sick fucks are thinking abt it.

"I HAVE COME TO BRING YOU BACK TO THE GAY SIDE, XENO WE HAVE COOKIES. bc i really miss that bammin slammin bootilicious sex we used 2 have and you are in fact bammin slammin bootilicious. also have u heard the word and gospel of our savior mother" elc said gayly

"dude no please stop preaching in my house im a changed man now" xeno pirouetted out of bed

"cmon man im ur seme u cant refuse we made like a yaoi blood oath u cant go back on ur word" elc pushed him back on thebed bc he'd have his ass yet anyway so no real use getting up. bc what is consent anyway hes Bad

"o shit really huh" klaus paused in thougt and bad elc laughed evilly. his plan was working!! all he had 2 do was the final touches! i mean besides touching xenos dick or whatever we're not yet. sorry u have to suffer for ten more paragraphs for sweat boy on boy. elc then turned around an produced a kitty keyboard from the recesses of his coat tails. xeno made the :O face and elc sat down bc playing while standing rly fuckin g sucks

"i wrote this for u on the moon so you'll be hypnotized by my sick beats" then he pulled the mic out of the keyboard and made a sick beatbox noise. No i dont know what the fuck it sounds like just google it. klaus blushued and made another gay gasp and elc made the >:3 face

then be started to play the piano keyboard. he was playing cruel angel thesis, their theme song that they had decided at 1am while xeno was drunk af.  it was their theme song despite none of them speaking fucking japanese but they just felt it in their SOULS. it was rly gay. elc was going so fucking hARD that his hard on was getting 40 hard ons. and thats four tens the hard ons. and its rad.

except the ebst part was it was all in meows so it spoke 2 klaus' furry soul.

klaus nyaed softly in surprise and suddenly all his memories of being xneo were restored!!! he gave into the desire that he craved in his soul and opened his big man arms bc for some reaon everyone thinks dudes are thirsty af. dont ask me why

"elc1!1 pls take me!! but be gentle my ass hasnt been ravaged in 1000 years (sick reference to hilda and altos magical wedding night by sorunort like, comment, subscribe for more sick referneces like this one)" xeno mewled like afucking furry and elc nodded once. xeno walked up to elc an touched his man boob sensually even tho xeno is like 60 feet taller than elc just imagine it ok

elc now has sunglasses just bc i think its a funny image

"xeno...... lets do it" elc said softly

"o h elc senpai......." xeno meowed

"and i'll keep my sunglasses on bc i hate the sun #moonlifeforever" and xeno gayzed into his emotion shields sensuallyier. then elc kissed him passionately and their tongues battled for dominance but we all know klaus is a fucking bottom bitch as stated in hilda and altos magical wedding night by sorunort paragraph 17 and 18 bc it was a dialogue.

then elc ripped off his clothes bc hes fucking JACKED and jACKED OFF and xeno gay gasped forlike the third time in this fic. elc was fuckign shredded. legends told of his abs but this time it was real. almost like the fact that shaved ice flavors dont actually exists the syrup is just food coloring.  his dong dangled in the breeze and xeno was turned tf on so he took off his clothes too bc hes not a god damn animal god whats wrong with u elc.

except elc didnt take off the sunglasses like he promised so those were still on dont worry readers i got you covered.

"get on ur knees dude and give me a wet willy but like on my dick" elc demanded

"wtf no"

"dude u cant say no its a smutfic"

"ok yeah i guess i kinda do like sucking dick or somethign"

"PREPARE TO EAT YOUR LAST DICK, XENO" elc cackcled and then xeno succed his dick like no tomorrow. elc practically creamed right there bc he couldnt get his rocks off on the moon for 1000 years (hahaha no im not gonna stop makign rock jokes). also xeno has no gagreflex bc he succed dick like a thousand times. once that was over elc just punched his dick in xenos hot cross buns and xeno meowed again

"why are u still a furry after 1000 years" elc asked but continued to Ravage The Promised Ass

"do u nyat like it erucu-kun???" xeno purred and elc shook his head

"no ur still banging its ok"

NUT THEN (i wanted to write but but i typoed and decided to keep it its funnier this way) xenos ass started 2 glow with a new holy light

"WHAT tHE FUCK" elc yelled

"my ass was actually the only way we could turn u good again! the more u fuck me the gooder u are!" and elc gasped gayily! no! his plan was working against him! he could alredy feel the goodness (haha get it bc fucking is hot i guess) turning him good! he had 2 pull out but found he couldnt. xeno was just too bammin slammin bootlicious

"HOW DARE YOU TRICK, I, ELCREST THE CONDICKTOR" he roared and xeno was tuned on again bc roaring is prolly a furry thign im not a furry im sorry

"it was for ur own good elc bc i love you!" xeno dokied so hard there were shoujo sparkles and even elc got shoujo sparkles. his azure optics glew like stella glow and u could almost see constellations in them. except there were sunglasses so u couldnt actually see it but the reader can. xneo was right. he was his tru  love..... not the Mother..... his mom was lame anyway all she did was talk to rocks

"xeno.............." elc said wiwstfully before bangin xeno harder. their bangin was so intense everyone could hear it in the kngihts barraks. it was so loud that even ana in her coma woke up for like a second to be like The Gays are At It Again. soon enough the banging was sucessful. elc glew in a beautiful magical girl ligtht and he was become good again. xeno shed a single tear but licked it away

"im cured! xeno ur ass did it! plus that was hot" elc smiled and im pretty sure xeno cried bc look at that man. hes so beautiful. please take the $2 from my purse. they embraced in a gay way. it was cute and xeno did a thumbs up and ana's face appeared at 20% opacity in the bg and she was also winking

"elc i am so glad u are back and i love u" then they made out. for a rly long time too bc theyre so fucking GAY good lord how could stella glow keep this under wraps. then they decidd they had to punch eve in the rock bc she was a dickw hile elc was being emo and stuff. BUT FIRST, xeno got porked lke 80 more times b4 then bc 1000 years does a lot do u.

the end remember to like, comment, subscribe for more fics like this one, seeya