#im kinda worried about this one hopefully yall like it haha

[arckook]

next time - haechan x reader part one

pairing: haechan x reader

au: high school

warnings: swearing

word count: 5.4k

description: You’ve gone to an all-girls’ academy for the better part of your school career- the only boy you’re really friends with is your moderately lame cousin Mark. Usually, Mark avoids having you and his baseball team present at the same time, but after an unfortunate return from the convenience store, you end up meeting six of his appallingly handsome teammates. And boys, as you’ve forgotten over the years, make everything more complicated.

a/n: im using stage names in this fic! as such, reader will call donghyuck haechan and yukhei lucas :) i hope everyone enjoys, and i will do my best to get the next part out asap!

You tiptoe through the meadow, the fresh scent of wildflowers and herbs wafting through the air. Everything around you seems to have a golden light- a supernatural luminescence that emphasizes the natural beauty of the world around you. Tilting your head up to the sky, you trace the patterns of the stars with your pointer finger, recognizing none of them.

“Wonderful, isn’t it?” A familiar, yet somehow nostalgic voice calls from behind you. You turn, unsure of who to expect, and yet, when you see him, he seems to fit the voice you’d heard moments ago perfectly.

“Yoo Jaeseok?” you ask, brows furrowing. “What are you doing here?”

The famous comedian simply smiles comfortingly at you. “Well, I’m here to tell you that-”

“I won’t call you again, Y/N, you’re going to be late for school!” You wince as bright light hits your eyelids and your mom’s voice hits your ears.

“Fuck,” you mutter to yourself, digging your face into your pillow. Another day of school. It never ends.

“I heard that!” your mom calls, and you almost swear again at her insane auditory perception, but bite your tongue.

Dragging yourself out of bed wondering why you feel like you had kind of a weird dream, you sluggishly make it to the bathroom, where you actually wake up and start getting ready for the day.

By the time you make it downstairs and to the front door, you look as presentable as you do on a regular basis, which is to say, wearing the school uniform and with your hair pulled away from your face.

Your mom is at the counter with a lunch prepared for you to take, but she stops you just as you start to call a “Bye, love you!”

“Are you wearing makeup?” she demands, grabbing your chin and turning your face from side to side.

“No, mom, stop!” you struggle to free yourself as your mother starts rubbing at your cheeks. “Mom! I swear to Jesus himself!”

She lets you go with an unsatisfied hmph and gestures towards the door. “Hyunjoo is waiting outside for you. Don’t put makeup on in the school bathroom.”

“Uh huh,” you say with a sweet smile, and promptly sprint out of the door and into freedom.

“What happened to you?” your best friend, Do Hyunjoo asks with humor in her expression as you shut your front door behind you, out of breath.

“I need to move out,” you tell her frankly, grabbing the banana milk she has in her left hand for you. You both start walking on the same path you’ve been taking to get to school for the past three years, everything around very familiar and at this point, kind of boring.

Hyunjoo laughs, her wide eyes crinkling up so that they’re barely visible. “Is that why you’re always at your cousin’s house?”

You nod, sipping from the drink she’d given you. “I’d literally just live there if it was closer to school.”

“You can live at my house,” Hyunjoo winks, raising her eyebrows up and down, and you laugh.

“Geez, can you imagine the rumors at school if we did that?”

“Come on, Y/N, doesn’t everyone kinda know I’m into girls anyway?”

After twenty or so minutes of walking, you make it to your high school, the imposing, large building looking totally ordinary in your eyes. The faculty member in the front of the school checks you and Hyunjoo off (almost late, but that’s normal for you two) and sends you in, telling you to go straight to your classroom.

The day goes by as usual. Lim Naeun talks about her “boyfriend” like she does everyday (you don’t think he’s real), the girls in the corner spend every minute they can fangirling over some idol, you don’t understand shit when it comes to math, and by the end of it all, you are so tired of the female voice that you feel like you could gouge out your eardrums.

You love going to an all girls’ school. Honestly, you do. The sisterhood between your class is strong- you have all known each other for years, after all. There’s not really much drama because all dating happens outside of school (well… all dating involving boys, that is) and since your school is moderately prestigious, all of you have good grades and competition for college isn’t as intense as other high schools.

You also feel way more comfortable at school. There’s none of the awkwardness that comes from not wanting to explain why you need a bag to go to the bathroom when it’s your period, nobody ever gets worried about not shaving their legs, and you’ve never dealt with annoying guys who think trashing women is funny.

With all that said, you sometimes need a break from girl time. Because girl time for you is literally all time.

“Yah, Y/N!” Hyunjoo calls after you. You’d made a very you exit by ditching as soon as the bell rang, politely yet very quickly saying byes and have a good weekends to your classmates. “How can you just leave your dearest friend like that?”

You pause until she catches up with you, then start walking again at a brisk pace. “I’m going to Mark’s house, wanna come?”

She gives you an ‘are you serious’ face. “Y/N, we’ve been over this. I can’t just go over to your cousin’s house.”

“I mean, you could. What is he gonna do, kick you out?”

Hyunjoo smacks you on the arm, making you whine. “No, idiot, but it’s still rude!”

“Fine then.” you flip your hair over your shoulder. “I’ll see you… sometime.”

“Don’t be dramatic,” Hyunjoo sighs as you both stop where you’ll have to go the opposite way from your neighborhood. She pats your head, even though she is not really any taller than you. “See you on Monday.”

You smile, abandoning your moody persona, and flash your best friend a finger heart. “Bye!”

“Sometimes it really feels like you don’t even have your own house.”

You side-eye your cousin from your stretched-out, relaxed, nearly upside down position on the couch in his living room. “And?”

Mark gives you a look. A shady look, specifically. “And, you’re lucky your schedule just happens to not coincide with when the team comes over.”

You scoff, quickly righting yourself so that you’re sitting straight and staring your cousin down. “That is such bull and you know it Mark Lee. I know for a fact that you have specifically kept me from being around when your ‘team’ or whatever is!”

Mark shrugs, already focusing back onto the video game he’s playing on the flat screen TV. “Either way, my point still stands.”

You slump back down, going back to texting Hyunjoo, Jo Yuyeon, and Park Jisu about the group project that you have to do for your math class. “Your point is sitting on it’s ass just like you,” you grumble, hoping Mark doesn’t hear, but you guess that everyone related to you just has supersonic hearing abilities, because his head snaps back towards you at lightning speed. Before he can threaten you, though, you jump from your spot on the couch and start power-walking to the front door.

“I’m going to get some snacks, want anything?”

You can’t actually see your cousin roll his eyes, but you feel that energy from him. “No, it’s a waste of money.”

“Okay, bye!” you call, closing the front door behind you and popping some earphones in and sunglasses on as you walk down the street to the nearest convenience store.

You walk up and down the aisles of the store a few times so that you’re gone for more than like, two minutes, avoiding a weird middle-aged man who keeps looking at you from the tables by the windows, before deciding on some chips and an aloe drink. You pay, thinking briefly about how this truly is a waste of money, and then leave.

“Hit you with that ddu-du ddu-du du,” you hum to yourself, making the finger gun motions as you bounce down the street back to Mark’s house.

By the time you get back, it’s up to the dance break part, and you being… well, you, throw open your cousin’s front door with a very exaggerated shout of “Blackpink!” and then poorly singing the instrumental as you plop the bag with your snacks on the counter. It hits you as you’re opening your drink that Mark has not groaned dramatically or questioned your behavior like he usually would by this point, and that is why you slowly turn around, lifting your sunglasses off your face.

Staring back at you is not just your cousin, who has an extremely amused expression, but six other guys, who all appear to be very hot, and very confused.

You pull out your earphones and set your phone on the counter quickly, jaw dropping open.

“What the hell!” you exclaim towards Mark, who apparently can’t contain himself, and starts laughing behind his hand. “Who are these people?”

A few of the boys look at each other, some of them also seeming like they’re about to break out into laughter, and one of them shyly raises his hand. “We’re Mark’s baseball team. Well, some of it.”

This does not help explain anything to you, since literally twenty minutes ago your cousin was saying how good it was that you’d never been there when his team was over.

You don’t reply, just continuing to stare at them in shock. You don’t really get to see many boys around your age, since you’ve gone to the girls’ school for a few years now. Are all of them this handsome?

“Nice singing,” one says, practically snickering, and you’re suddenly snapped out of your trance.

“If that was sarcastic, I’ll seriously fight you-” you start, and Mark hurriedly stands up, walking over to you and putting his hands on your shoulders. You narrow your eyes at him, but he starts talking anyway.

“Guys, this is my cousin Y/N. She goes to an all girls’ academy, so that’s why she’s really surprised to see you.”

“Hi, Y/N,” they chorus back at the two of you.

You swat Mark’s hands off of you, an unimpressed look on your face. “No, I’m surprised because you purposely keep me from being here at the same time as them,” you say with emphasis, in case he never told them that.

“Haha, what?” your cousin tries to play it off, but his team seems to find what you’d said really funny.

“Are you serious?” One of them, with the most blinding, handsome smile you’ve ever seen on a boy asks. For a moment you’re starstruck, just looking at him in awe, before you snap out of it again.

You smile at him sweetly. “Yeah, Mark’s just jealous ‘cause I’m more fun than him.”

The boy chuckles, looking around at the other guys, and immediately you feel your cousin’s death stare on the back of your head.

“Guys, just excuse us for a minute,” he tells the group, and they all nod, waving him off. Mark gently pushes you out the door, crossing his arms once you’re both outside.

“You don’t look intimidating,” you tell him, just so he knows.

He sighs, dropping his arms. “I know. I also know I may be asking you for too much here, but can you not flirt with Jaemin while I’m around? Or for that matter, anybody on my team?”

“So that’s his name…” you muse aloud, which is followed by another sigh on your cousin’s part.

“Y/N, please focus.”

“My apologies,” you bow your head. “I will try not to flirt with Jaemin.”

“...Or?”

You sigh. “Or any of your other teammates.”

“Okay, good.” Mark says, giving you his mildly shady side eye again. “I’m putting my faith in your maturity. If this goes well, you’re allowed to come to our next game.”

“What!” you exclaim, and he hurriedly shushes you. “What!” you repeat in a whisper-shout. “You better keep that promise.”

He offers you his pinky. “Promise.”

You wrap yours around his and squeeze it tight. “No take-backs.”

“Never,” Mark says, and opens the door again, leading you back to the baseball team.

The team stays over for a few hours, over which you learn all their names: Jaemin with the godly smile, Jeno whose eyes crinkle up, Lucas who towers over the rest of you, Renjun who is definitely the smartest person there, Chenle, who has an absolutely hilarious laugh, and Haechan, who seems like a major entertainer, but hasn’t spoken directly to you the whole afternoon.

Mark’s parents seem to know all of them really well, which only makes it weirder that you’ve never ever met the team before. You guess Mark is just smarter than you thought.

When it’s starting to get dark, you stretch from your place on the couch (the most comfortable spot that had been granted to you and the youngest of their group, Chenle) and heave a deep sigh.

“I think I’m gonna get going,” you say, not speaking to anyone in general.

“Okay, bye.” Mark replies, lying right below the couch, not even bothering to look at you instead of at his phone screen. You kick him lightly in the side, crossing your arms. “Ow-! What the he-”

“Don’t be fucking rude,” you scold him as he curls up, the other boys laughing from their various positions on the floor around the living room. Standing, you brush your hair out of your face and start grabbing the stuff you’d had when you came over. “I’ll tell your mom.”

Mark just groans.

“What part of town do you live in? I gotta get home too,” Jaemin says, sitting up. You glance over with wide eyes, unsure of if he really just said that.

“Yeah, me too,” Jeno says, and the other four chorus the same thing.

“Uhm, I live by that park with the white tiger statues,” you answer vaguely. Your dad always told you to keep your address to yourself.

“Oh, I know where that is!” Jaemin smiles, then seems to remember it’s distance from Mark’s house. “It’s a shame, we all live around here…”

“Haechan lives by you, Y/N!” Chenle pipes up, pointing towards said boy. Your eyes follow Chenle’s finger to Haechan, who is staring with intensity at the younger boy. Immediately understanding what Haechan is trying to communicate, you chuckle and wave off Chenle’s words.

“No, no worries, nobody needs to walk back with me. I go to and from Mark’s house by myself all the time. Thank you, though.” you smile particularly in Jaemin’s direction, although, trying to make yourself less obvious, you look around the whole room while talking.

“Yep, she’s fine,” Mark comments, glaring at you from the floor.

With a few more assurances to the boys who seem to have some kind of protective feelings towards you, you pop in your earphones and head out the door, your feet mindlessly carrying you the same path you take all too often.

Mark lives in one of the lesser-traveled neighborhoods, and there’s nobody around at this hour- students are already home by now, but adults still aren’t off of work. Plus, you typically take a shortcut through a few alleys to cut the time it takes to get home a little faster.

You make it about ten minutes before you start getting a weird feeling. It’s pretty much night by now, and even though you usually aren’t afraid at all walking by yourself, you have that hair-raising sense that someone is watching you. You take small peeks over your shoulder and pull out an earphone as you change your route and head toward the bus stop, deciding to spend the money instead of walking the whole way home.

Step, step.

Your head whips around, the unmistakable sound of heavy footsteps behind you causing your heart rate to skyrocket. Just as your eyes catch a figure that had been about ten feet back, it swiftly ducks behind a wall.

You bite your lip, looking around to see if anyone else is around- but no one is, of course. The lights in the homes nearby are on, though, which gives you some confidence.

“Is someone there?” you call out, knowing that if the figure that had been there before doesn’t come clean here and now, you will most definitely turn and put your middle school track skills to use.

“...No.” a soft, slightly high-pitched male voice rings out.

...What?

You tilt your head, not knowing where this is going, or if you’re actually in danger.

The figure comes back out from behind the wall. You squint as they walk forward a few steps and end up under a street lamp, pulling the hooding on their head down.

“Haechan?” your jaw drops. “...What?”

The boy who had been the most awkward to you the entire night shrugs, looking embarrassed. “Not going to lie, Jaemin and Lucas kind of pressured me into making sure you got home alright.”

“Jesus,” you sigh, wiping off the sweat that had collected from stress on your forehead. “You scared the shit out of me.”

He winces. “Sorry. That wasn’t really the intention?”

A few seconds pass in silence. You’re not really sure what to say, and clearly Haechan doesn’t have much of an interest in you considering how he acted earlier, so the situation definitely feels… weird, to say the least.

“Um, do you want to go together from here? I mean, we do live by each other.” Haechan asks, sounding like he’s not really sure about his offer himself.

You resist a smile as you watch his fingers intertwine and stretch around nervously. “Uh, sure? But you don’t have to, you know. You were the only creepy guy following me.”

Haechan laughs, which is again, kind of weird, because while he had done that at Mark’s house, he hadn’t in response to something you said. “Yeah, sorry again.” he sheepishly unlocks his hands and rubs the back of his neck, not responding to you telling him he didn’t have to come along with you.

“It’s fine.” you say, waiting for him to walk forward and catch up with you. The two of you start walking again, side by side. “Do you wanna take the bus?”

He shrugs. “Do you want to?”

“I like walking, but it’s way faster if we take the bus.”

He shoots a condescending look at you. “I know that. I was asking in case you don’t have any money.”

You laugh out loud at that. “Thanks for the concern.” Thinking on it, you glance over at Haechan, feeling a curiosity well up inside of you. You want to talk to him more- find out why he was so quiet earlier, and why he didn’t just agree to walk back with you from the start. “Let’s take the bus next time.”

The next morning, you wake up feeling like yesterday’s events were barely real. A regular day of hanging out with your lame cousin had turned into meeting more boys than you think you’ve ever held legitimate conversations with, and that had turned into walking home with Lee Donghyuck, who actually ended up being really funny and charming.

“Oh my god,” you whisper to yourself, staring up at the ceiling. “I need to tell Hyunjoo.”

You toss yourself across your bed to reach over and grab your phone off the nightstand, tapping the screen furiously in the hopes that it’ll turn on faster. “Come on,” you whine, watching the reset screen intently. As soon as the lockscreen picture of you and Hyunjoo appears, you’re unlocking the phone and opening your texts.

To: Hyunnie<3 at 9:21

HYUNJOO!!!!!!! wake up!!!!! youre never going to believe what happened last night!!!!!!!

You stare at the screen, waiting for the three dots that will indicate your best friend is replying to show up. But they don’t. Dammit. Curse her habit of sleeping in way, way too late. Discouraged, you groan and throw your arm over your eyes, turning off your phone.

You’re starting to feel yourself fall asleep again when a loud ding! from your phone makes shocks you out of your drowsiness. Expecting to see a reply from Hyunjoo, you’re even more surprised when it’s not.

From: Mark :/ at 9:27

Jaemin is pressuring me into inviting you to our game next week. So I guess you’re invited.

You let out a maniacal laugh as soon as you read the message.

To: Mark :/ at 9:28

hahahahahaha youre such a pushover. tell jaemin i said hi ;)

From: Mark :/ at 9:28

Oh my god… not gonna happen.

To: Mark :/ at 9:29

lol im kidding

or am i??

anyway ill be there!!!!!!! can i bring a friend?

A few minutes pass without Mark replying, so you get out of bed with a big smile, suddenly feeling even better than you were before. You sit down at your desk, starting to put some makeup on for no reason, since you don’t have plans for today besides working on your part of the math project.

Ding!

You glance over at the phone screen as you pat on some concealer, another cackle leaving your lips.

From: Hyunnie<3 at 9:50

Yah… don’t tell me you did something scandalous??

“What the hell,” you mumble with a chuckle, shaking your head at your best friend’s wandering mind.

To: Hyunnie<3 at 9:51

what are you thinking you pervert?????

i finally met marks baseball team!!! and they were all hot!!!

From: Hyunnie<3 at 9:53

Eh??? Are you serious?

To: Hyunnie<3 at 9:56

hey… you should come over with the excuse that we need to work on the math project together and we can stalk all their instagrams

All she sends back is a thumbs up.

“So he smiled at you?” Hyunjoo laughs joyously, kicking her legs like a kid. “Ah, he’s super cute, Y/N!”

You lean your head on her shoulder as you both look at Jaemin’s profile after he quickly accepted your friend request. “I know right? He was seriously dreamy…”

“Ooo,” Hyunjoo taps on a picture of Jaemin with who you recognize as Lucas. “Who is he though?”

“Oh, that’s Lucas Wong, he’s an exchange student. He’s super tall.” you comment as Hyunjoo zooms in on his face.

“Damn,” she says, opening Lucas’s instagram. “Follow him too.”

“Bitch,” you snatch your phone back as she’s about to hit the follow button, since his profile isn’t private. “Don’t make it look like I’m thirsty. Follow him yourself.”

Hyunjoo smacks you on the arm. “Are you crazy? He doesn’t even know me.”

You wince, rubbing your arm with a pout. “So? To be honest, he seemed kind of into himself so I don’t even think he’d question it.”

Hyunjoo rolls her eyes, taking your phone back from your hands as you go back to trying to solve one of the equations on your paper.

Both of you are quiet for a while as Hyunjoo scrolls through Lucas’s extensive portfolio of selfies and gym pics and you do your best on your part of the project.

“Oh, Mark texted you,” Hyunjoo says eventually. You look over to see her open the message, and subsequently watch her jaw drop open.

“What?” you lean over to read the text.

From: Mark :/ at 12:44

Okay, you can bring Do Hyunjoo, but NOBODY ELSE. I’m serious.

You laugh at your best friend’s expression.

“Where? Where are you bringing me? To Mark’s house?” her face turns sour. “I told you it’d be weird if I go there.”

“No,” you roll your eyes. “To Mark’s baseball game next week.”

Hyunjoo drops your phone. “Seriously? Finally? After all this time?”

You hmm, picking up your phone and pushing the math work over to her. “Apparently Jaemin asked Mark to ask me to come.”

“Ugh,” Hyunjoo groans, slumping over. “How are you so lucky, Y/N?”

“Me? Lucky?” you scoff. “You’re the one with perfect grades… honestly, isn’t GPA the most important thing in this life?”

Hyunjoo laughs, reaching over and pinching your arm. You glare and swat her hand away, but she just looks at you fondly. “Duh. That’s why I’m about to correct all of this poorly done math.”

“Ah, really?” you cringe. “Okay, show me what I did wrong, then…”

“Hey, Y/N, you made it!”

You and Hyunjoo, arm in arm, dressed in an appalling amount of spiritwear from Mark’s school, turn to look at who has just called your name. Immediately after seeing Jaemin’s bright smile hands waving you to come over to where the rest of the baseball team is getting ready to warm up, you feel a dream-like grin appear on your own face.

“Hi, Jaemin,” you say as Hyunjoo practically drags you over now that you’ve gone into a ‘holy shit he’s so cute how can I even focus’ phase. “Of course I made it.”

Jaemin nods, still beaming at you, then glances over at Hyunjoo. “I’m guessing you’re Y/N’s friend?”

“Yup, I’m Do Hyunjoo,” your best friend says, bowing her head slightly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too!” Jaemin says, then opens his mouth to continue, but he’s cut off but someone else practically jumping him, looping their strong arm over his neck.

“Hey, Mark’s cousin! I didn’t know you were coming!”

“Lucas,” you smile politely at him, trying to see if Jaemin is actually choking or not. “This is my friend, Hyunjoo.” you take the opportunity to introduce them considering how many screenshots of Lucas’s selfies your best friend had sent you over the course of the past week.

Lucas just nods even as Hyunjoo says hello to him, then seems to get distracted by someone else behind you all and releases Jaemin, barely even offering a goodbye.

“So, uhhh…” you peek around Jaemin to look at the rest of the team. There’s Chenle, Renjun, Jeno, and some others you didn’t meet, but… “Do you know where my cousin is? Or Haechan?”

Jaemin tilts his head, humming in thought. “Uh, I think they went to get water or something, not sure.”

You smile reassuringly. “That’s okay.”

A moment passes in silence where you and Jaemin are just sort of looking at each other and then glancing away- out of nowhere you’re feeling shy and nervous.

Hyunjoo looks unamused. “When do you guys start warming up? Is there somewhere Y/N and I should sit?”

Jaemin seems to snap out of it, so you follow suit and focus. “Oh, yeah, we’ll start warming up in like five minutes. If you guys want to go sit down, you’ll have to go over there-” he points to a section of the stands that seems to be primarily occupied by middle-aged couples. “Since you don’t go to our school.”

“Thanks,” Hyunjoo bows her head. “We’ll get going now.” She firmly loops her arm around your elbow and mercilessly starts dragging you away.

“Good luck, Jaemin!” you call out to the boy as he chuckles. “Tell Mark hi for me!”

The handsome kid shoots you another blinding smile and a thumbs up, pivoting to head back to the bench where the rest of the team is.

“You are so embarrassing,” Hyunjoo huffs as the two of you settle down in the very front row of what appears to be the parent section.

You pout, lightly smacking your friend on the arm. “Hey! I saw the way you were looking at Lucas. ‘I like girls more’ my ass.”

She scoffs. “I definitely do, headass, but are you really going to tell me I shouldn’t admire a man who looks like that?”

You shrug, pulling out a granola bar from your bag. “Nah, I guess not. But whatever happened to your thing with Jung Chaeyoung?”

Hyunjoo sighs. “She said I make her feel too dumb, remember?” she rolls her eyes. “Like, am I supposed to apologize for being smart?”

“Shhh!” a mom leans down over yours and Hyunjoo’s shoulder, just about scaring the shit out of you, but you apologetically nod to her, whispering sorrys as someone announces that the game will start in five minutes.

“Do you know how baseball works?” you whisper to Hyunjoo, taking as quiet of a bite as possible from the granola bar.

She shakes her head. “I don’t have time to learn about sports, Y/N.”

“Ah, right…”

The announcer lists the players from the opposing team, then starts on Mark’s team, beginning with Chenle, then Lucas, some people you don’t know, Renjun, Jeno-

“Woohoo! Come on Mark, you got this! You can do it, let’s get it Mark Lee!” you shout, standing up enthusiastically.

“Oh my fucking god,” you hear Hyunjoo whisper as she frantically grabs your arm and yanks you down.

You burst into laughter even as you feel various parents’ disapproving looks. “What? I’m supporting my family.”

“You look crazy,” Hyunjoo deadpans.

Shrugging, you finish off the granola bar, as you and your best friend settle into watching the baseball game, during which you have no clue what’s going on.

When the game ends (after what feels like a lifetime), you and Hyunjoo scurry out of the stands and back down to where Jaemin initially met you. The team is in deep discussion with their coach as most of the boys shake off sweat and take long sips of water, putting their gear away.

Eventually, though, one by one they file out and into the common area where you’re waiting, and you take the opportunity to pounce on your cousin as soon as it appears.

“Mark!” you shout, jumping onto your cousin’s back gleefully. He lets out an unattractive ‘humph’ sound and nearly falls, snapping his head around to give you a death glare as you slide off. “Did you hear me cheering for you? That’s probably why you guys won!”

Your cousin lets out a deep sigh, moving out of the line to stand by you and Hyunjoo. “We probably won because we’re good, but if you want to believe it was your cheering-”

“Y/N, Hyunjoo!” you glance behind Mark to see Jaemin dragging Haechan along behind him, the former sporting his signature smile while the latter looks a bit awkward.

“Hey, you both did great out there!” you shoot them a thumbs up. “I saw your… your slide thing, whatever it is, Haechan!”

He nods, a shy grin peeking through. “Thanks. I was kinda worried, but it worked out.”

“Oh, definitely,” you assure him, even though you have no idea what the slide on the ground was for or how it worked out at all.

“So, are you two headed home now?” Jaemin asks, throwing an arm around Mark’s shoulder. “Or a party at this one’s house maybe?”

“Please, no,” Mark shuts his eyes, breathing deeply.

“I gotta run some errands for my mom down the street,” Hyunjoo says, looking annoyed at the idea. She turns to you, a concerned expression passing over her face. “Are you going to be okay walking by yourself?”

“Yeah, it should be okay, I told you last week, I’m totally used to going around alone-”

“I’ll walk back with you, Y/N.” Haechan’s voice interrupts your attempt to convince Hyunjoo that you’ll be fine.

You match his gaze, tilting your head slightly, but this time, Haechan doesn’t look the least bit nervous about talking to you. “You sure?”

He hesitates for just a moment, until a crooked smile forms on his lips and he nods. “Uh-huh.”

Jaemin looks in between you two, then with a slightly awkward sounding laugh, gestures to Hyunjoo and Mark. “You guys wanna head back our way, then?”

“Our way? Hyunjoo repeats, looking confused.

“Yeah, Mark and I live down that street,” Jaemin says, pointing to where she had gestured to earlier. “Unless you’d rather go alone?”

“Um, if you guys don’t mind me tagging alone,” Hyunjoo shrugs, a nervous smile overtaking her expression. You laugh mentally, but not out loud.

“No problem Hyunjoo, you’re better company than your best friend,” Mark says, talking for the first time in forever.

“Ouch,” you mumble, but you’re laughing.

And for the second time, you find yourself walking home in the cool evening air, with Lee Haechan. You didn’t even take the bus.

[oriigirii]

Streamer MC headcannons with the brothers 💞

"You were quite a known face on social media back in the human realm, playing games, doing unboxings, just vibin in general, fans around the globe looked forward to your streams a lot! However, considering the sudden (unannounced) invitation to the exchange program, you had to leave all of that behind out of the blue. It wasn't as bad at first, but you have to admit you do miss the feeling of being able to do goofy shit online. Luckily for you, with the advance technology of Devildom and some spicy magic, the internet had synced with the human realm, and thats when you decided to finally re-enter the streaming scene. How will the brothers react upon seeing your peculiar past time?"

Head empty, No thoughts aside from the brothers just bothering the MC while they stream so here you go haha

Warnings: None, just crackhead energy and a lotta mispellings

Gender: Neutral!

Hotel: Trivago

* [ ಠ╭╮ಠ ] Lucifer *

{How did he know about your career?}

I honestly don't see him as someone who goes on the internet a lot

(He screams boomer to me, change my mind)

He doesn't have the time either, he's too focused on work!

So him finding out is gonna take a while

But! He did find out the hard way when shrilled screaming was heard from your room when he was passing by with some paper stacks in his arms (courtesy of Diavolo)

This man felt his instincts kick in, he ran as fast as he could, papers forgotten, and he immediately slammed your door open. Splinters scattering around, your door definitely damaged, as his eyes held a glare and his demon form was out, wings spread in a threatening display.

He was ready to beat someone's ass as he had thought someone had hurt you in here.

But all hes met with is you, infront of your chair and PC, and a game over on the screen...

To say he was unamused was an understatement cause you just lost your internet priviliges for giving him a heart attack (He said it was because you were being rowdy and noisy but with what you saw you knew that wasn't the case)

Good luck tryna puppy-eye your way to his heart to let you continue streaming lol.

If by some miracle you managed to wriggle your rights back from his hands, he'd warn you not to be so loud next time.

You already learnt your lesson though~ (Hopefully)

{How does he feel about your streams?}

Not everyone's the same, so if you were the shy soft streamer who does more art streams or something akin to a podcast, you can bet that Lucifer will be putting you on while he works, he kinda knows your streaming schedule at this point and if you were running late, he'd force one of his brothers to take over your dish washing duties or any chores you were stuck with

If you were the loud obnoxious meme type, hed still try to watch out of curiosity, and as much as he appreciates that you were getting comfortable here in Devildom with how you laugh and joke around, he still can't approve of it. Its too loud, its much like his brothers energy and he has enough of that already, so he probably doesn't watch as much.

He has countlessly came to your room to shush you and at this point your fans had made a compilation of each time Lucifer had barged in to tell you off

Look he likes it when you scream, but not when hes in the middle of work okay--

At this point, chat has deemed Lucifer as dad and you as their mom/dad.

If he ever catches wind of this he'd definitely be teasing you in private for centuries to come.

Overall fine with it, as long as don't do something stupid on stream.

* ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Mammon*

{How did he know about your career?}

I would say he found out by him crashing into your streams midway but that's too predictable, hence why you've Mammon-proofed your bedroom during streaming hours!

Thanks to our wizard daddy, you have managed to cast a simple lock spell on your door and as well as a sound proofing

You love your broke idiot, but you did wanna keep the tone of your stream today a bit more chill, you wanted to have a proper Q&A with your fans to hopefully clear any bad vibes around your 3 month disappearance.

When Mammon has learnt your door was locked he definitely was a bit pissy, he knocked on your door loudly even and was calling out for you to let him in, but to no avail.

Bro he's scared.

He usually was allowed to enter, and you usually answered if you did need to be left alone for a bit, so just leaving him hanging got his mind racing and he had to press up his ear on the wooden door to try and hear if you were okay

When this continues on he finally resorts to getting help, but the only one in the house ws Levi, so he kicks down HIS door.

Levi boutta summon Lotan for interrupting him honestly

But as Mammon exclaim you weren't answering and he worried for your wellbeing, Levi rolls his eyes and scoffs,

"Idiot Mammon, they're streaming don't bother them…"

Streaming? why didn't you tell him???

Rude much.

He did huff and now was forcing his way to use Levi's PC for a moment

Can Levi stop him?

Nah.

He was busy on his console, and if he stood up now hed be breaking his world record so he was at a terrible state so he just resorts to threats of him drowning the Avatar of Greed if he does anything stupid on his PC.

He immediately logs in to your streaming platform and he watches for a bit,

You were more dolled up now just to look decent on stream, and he felt this jealousy rise as you interact with your chat, especially to those saying I love you's and stuff, and you even said it back? the audacity! You were his werent you? Were you replacing him with these nobodies?

He huffs as he realized that those who paid got their message highlighted, and thus, he starts donating. (Mind you this was Levi's account...)

"Mcccccc Open the dooorrr"

"Ill behave i promiseeeee"

"Cmon pleaseeee?"

Chat is c o n f u s i o n

NGL, they thought Mammon was a creepy stalker and red flags were being waved everywhere

but as chat was pondering who the hell he was, you can only sigh and look at the camera with that unamused expression, but ugh! you just KNOW hes doing that kicked puppy expression of his, and maybe it really wont be so bad

So you snap your fingers and say, "Okay MonMon, its open, Im giving you 3 seconds"

Mammon wasnt deemed to be the fastest out of his brothers for nothing

As soon as you got to '2', you were already tackled by the white haired male and chat went wild.

Now that you've shown your life in Devildom, maybe its time to introduce chat to your boyfriend no?

{How does he feel about your streams?}

You get paid to sit infront of a camera, do I have to say anything else?

But really though, as much as he enjoys the thought of getting so much cash from something so simple, he prefers the joy of being able to proudly exclaim that he was your first man!

ohhhh he thrives on the salt of your overly attached stans

but for those who fully support you, he always feels so mushy and shy when they say the ship you guys so hard

The fanarts has him WEAK (he may or may not have saved a few)

You usually do streams alone, but now you've allowed the door to be left open to let Mammon join whenever

Chat pogs when he enters with so much confidence, only for it to crumble when you kiss his cheek on stream.

Overall finds it fun to spend time with you, but just dont play scary games cause Lucifer might hang him upside down on stream.

* ▘▂▝ Leviathan*

{How did he know about your career?}

He is honestly the most attached to his D.D.D and he catches wind of almost anything going down in the internet, so your 'revival' being hyped up was something he definitely saw and he was just s wo o o ned

His Henry 2.0? a famous streamer?

Were you truly a blessing gifted upon him or was he dreaming?

He definitely didn't bring it up at first as he didn't wanna make it a big deal, but you notice hes been more in his head lately, and you have tried asking him what it was but to no avail.

You have to corner this little snake if you want answers and he eventually admits that he knew of your persona online and was incredibly shy to ask you to stream with him

He's a streamer himself afterall but maybe he doesnt stream as much as you do nor does he have as large of a following, so his intrusive thoughts attacked him and made him think that maybe since he wasnt as famous he didnt deserve to be in the same stream as you

Please tell him to join you and gib him kiss U3U

He'll absolutely m e l t

But now, as you make the announcement to your viewers and Levi to his, the internet explodes as a special collab stream was hapening between the expert gamer and avatar of envy of Devildom along with the beloved exchange student and streamer of the human realm

Your usual viewers reach between 10-15k, but as you start stream, that number boosts higher and beyond

Before streaming though, Levi was incredibly nervous, he'd picked the games for you to play that he knew you would enjoy with him, but his mind kept racing about whatthe fans thought, he didnt wanna disappoint them

But you had to remind him that whatever they say will not matter in the end as this was merely for fun, this was YOUR stream and you guys were gonna do what you want and nobody can have a say on it. (Maybe except Lucifer)

You usually talk for him with your bubbly personality, and to calm his nerves, he hs your pinky wraped around his where the camera can't see it.

Regardless, his thoughts subsided as you two delve into your stream that lasted a solid 7 hours, you definitely promised your chat that you and Levi will be doing more streams together from now on.

Once the cameras cut and yall are left alone, Both of you collapse on bed, and despite you being asleep already, Levi was just far too giddy as everything dwells on him.

Having a player 2 by his side now had never felt so intoxicating and he as just so lucky to have you.

{How does he feel about your streams?}

He obviously adores it, although some streams he wouldnt join just so he can play games on his own

He's still an introvert afterall, he needs his alone time

But he prefers that alone time with you, his Henry.

So when youre about to go stream, he kinda becomes a bit pouty, but with a simple promise of kisses (and maybe even more if youd like) he would let you go, but his attention would disappear from his game altogether.

He might just end up watching you instead

May or may not, at some point, just chat you and ask if its too late to join you

You do allow him to join you and play from the comforts of his room as both of you can simply play via internet, you give him the comfort to not turn on his mic or webcam either and you have no idea how he appreciates that.

Will definitely fight someone online when they start claiming you as theirs (-cough- stans) Please make sure it doesnt escalate to him summoning Lotan

Although the comments would often get to him, and as much as he can fight them online, he still does find himself pondering if they were true, so you need to give him a lotta lovin and reminder that he is your player 1 and no one else can ever fill that place.

------

Wow 3 brothers this time, what an improvement, anyways hope yall enjoy! I think its pretty clear who I simp for depending o nthe length of each lol, but do let me know if you guys want a part 2 for the rest of the brothers, or even the undateables!

[matamisin]

Consider: Mina is a genuinely happy and positive person, but everyone has bad days (especially people who have been thru trauma, like seeing your loved ones regularly beaten to a bloody pulp). The thing is that Mina just. Refuses to show that trauma has actually been effecting her. She starts suppressing negative reactions to situations bc she wants to "stay strong." Beginning of the year? She cried when they got rescued from USJ. End of the year? "Lmao guess we survived another one! Ha! Ha! :)"

oh my god like millennial humor?? if yeah then lmao mina please

if not ahhh Mina baby you have feelings too that you gotta tend to!\

Alright- All (or at least all the angst headcanons I received) are answered below the cut! Please be careful, there are some, well angsty things in there!

TW: Eating Disorder, Gore/ Graphic Depictions, Homophobia, Depression, Suicidal Tendencies/ Self harm mention, Death, Possible spoilers to those not caught up with the BNHA manga- Please ask to tag if I missed any!

(looking at all these warnings made me realize omfg YALL DID NOT HOLD BACK IM CRYING ASK AND THOU SHALT RECEIVETH I SUPPOSE)

a-single-eyelash asked:

Denki accidentally hurt someone as a kid, say a sibling or good friend, with his quirk. It made him hate his work, until he saw a hero with a similar work to his. This is what made him think that not only is his quirk cool, but also that he can become a hero. Well until, he hurt Sero. His boyfriend, got electrocuted by him on the battlefield. (Sorry this is an idea I’ve had for a fic)

O H

BRUH THAT HIT ME LIKE A TRAIN COMING OUT FROM BEHIND THE BUSHES I THOUHGT THERE WAS GONNA BE A HAPPY ENDING THIS IS STILL GOOD THO 

anonymous asked:

Bakugou is still sad, Sero is suicidal (Read to may fics about it man), Kami is legitimately afraid he’ll disappoint his parents, Tsu feels to normal, Kiri feeeeeelsss way to useless, and idk maybe Aoyama feels ignored. My own angsty headcanons.

Ah, yeah I can see how those can play into those characters!

anonymous asked:

Sero’s fight or flight response with a villains ice-like quirk (if your for that headcanon) OR Sero overwhelming his quirk trying to rescue a goddamn building of people

OH YA I AM FOR THAT

Also NO STOP HAVE I GOT SOMETHING IN STORE ABOUT COLLAPSING BUILIDINGS

anonymous asked:

Ashido + Bakugou bond over their quirks being destructive and not really knowing how to use them to actually *help* people

oh wow, I’ve never actually seen it that way.

But how about this: while they vent to each other about how their quirks can’t help people, the other is like, full on giving them descriptions of how their quirks actually CAN but they just never realized and they’re opening each other’s eyes while having their own insecurities knocked down

anonymous asked:

Omg your angst au is so angsty it’s beautiful

AH thank you haha!

anonymous asked:

Angsty headcannon boi-  Sero was bullied in middle school for having wonky teeth and actually had braces. Which is why he has such a pearly white smile now.  Sero was the last in his class to get his quirk and when he did he was laughed at because it was a ‘useless quirk’

n O ANON IM SOB

IM CRYING LEAVE HIM ALONE ILL SQUARE UP WITH THOSE BULLIES

anonymous asked:

Angst head cannon.  Sero flinches whenever kirishima hardens.  Sero’s parents are majorly homophobic and are actually quite strict. So whenever sero isn’t with bakusquad he tries to revise but it doesn’t work and he’s scared to ask for help.

Aw, man that’s heart wrenching to have parents so unsupportive- I feel it :( He’s just in a constant worry state whenever they’re around

anonymous asked:

If you’re still accepting the angst hcs… i think kaminari gets like really overcharged whenever there’s a storm and since they moved to the dorms there’s nowhere for him to release all the excess energy. So he just kinda hides away in his room in pain.

Aw, that’s terrible!

I dunno.. I feel like that one day when someone finds out during a storm, they’ll like, ask the teachers about “where someone could discharge a lot of energy askingforafriend” and they immediately know who they’re talking about and they’ll ask Powerloader and Mei and others in their department to build something for him to discharge all the excess AND be able to utilize it somehow :0 just a thought!

anonymous asked:

My headcannons: Sero is anorexic Bakugou has PTSD Kaminari has depression Kirishima had self-esteem issues Ashido is perfect (canon)

Oh that last part- she is, she is *clap**clap*

Though.. I will say that just because the others are haunted by those- it doesn’t make them less perfect. It’s their struggles that they learn to cope with and grow from, and it makes them, well, them. Not a definition of perfect can define that :’)

(sorry just speaking from my thoughts cause these hit close to home ahhh)

anonymous asked:

Lmao i sent a lot sorry if their not the best but hopefully some heart strings will be pulled

NONSENSE ANON ALL MY HEART STRINGS WERE PLUCKED BY ALL THESE AND NOW ITS YALLS TURN

transcandydemon asked:

Todocanon; todoroki has constant nightmares of the boiling water incident and of his father hurting him or his mom which causes him to not get as much sleep ie his calm attitude and how he’s not quick to get into conversations because of exhaustion

oh ya, such a traumatic past is def something that could still be haunting him in his dreams :’( but when the others notice, they’ll make sure to check up on him and try to find ways to help reduce nightmares or at least comfort him whenever they’re in his dreams

anonymous asked:

Deku head canon : deku is super jealous of kirishimas and bakugoa relationship since hes been trying to get close to kacchan for years and kirishima managed to do it within days

D’: He probably would feel that- jealousy’s very strong! But ah, in my personal opinion, i think he’d feel that, but after time learns that maybe it was best that he stopped dwelling on it and moves on, and learns to accept and be happy that he and Bakugou could at least be acquaintances that could eventually work well :’)

anonymous asked:

Denki headcanon: where he wants to be as close to bakugo as kirishima is and he tries so damn hard but takes bakugos insults to heart and he really does get torn up and upset about it(ex: the sports festival scene )

Oh wait which scene? Dunce face or?? :0 but yeah, I feel like he’d take it to heart at times. (but my bakukami heart tells me to say that when Baku realizes he gives him a good ass pep talk and beings hold back on his insults, or reassures Denki)

anonymous asked:

Bakugou could have PTSD and nightmares

Oh same headcanon! :’D Ah, but poor Bakugou. I’m sure the others would take it into mind and be aware of it and help him subtly so as to not provoke him, :’(

violetsare-tblue asked:

Bakugo: because of his inferiority complex, feels like he needs to prove himself over and over or he’ll be just the victim again  Iida: his left arm is completely numb. He isn’t paralyzed and he can move it. He just can’t feel anything in his hand or arm. Makes holding hands with someone feel empty and useless  Sero: he is so scared of being worthless as a hero and a person. He doesn’t want to be left behind by his classmates so he overworks himself and comes to school with random bruises

Oh mmhmm, I definitely see the Bakugou one! Especially after what he said during his fight with Deku, it def shows :(

Aw, Iida probably still looks back at his actions back in the Stain arc and regrets the errors of his ways. Luckily, I’m sure he’ll find someone who helps him through it and reminds him that mistakes don’t define him :’)

:’( Serooo MAKING ME CRY

casua-aria asked:

I have this Sero headcanon where he was the disposable (like how when tape dispensers run out and become disposable) friend in groups throughout his childhood, but now that he goes to UA, he has true caring friends that would never do that to him.

D: !!

That’s so sad- he must have thought his quirk was just life taunting him for being “disposable” hence the tape quirk :( but heck yeah, once he meets the students of UA he definitely begins to see that he wasn’t the problem in the past, but rather those that he was “friends” with!

anonymous asked:

Sero remembering very clearly all the pain that happened when his arm got cut off, maybe being a little scared of Kirishima for a few days after he first wakes up? Idk

OH YEAH THAT ONE HURTS

Like maybe.. once he’s able to respond again, he flinches and has an anxiety attack when he sees Kirishima because the sight of him just sends a flood of the memory to play in his head OOF

anonymous asked:

A personal favorite that nobody’s really thought of: a villain cuts off one finger from each of Ochako’s hands so she can’t use her quirk

OH MAN THATS BRUTAL OMG

That’s so dark!! I feel like a villain would do that should they get a hold of her and, mm maybe wanna rile up someone close to her to lure them in

meptoonzart asked:

Kirishima traitor

b R U H ID CRY MY EYES OUT IF HORI MADE HIM THE TRAITOR

                                                                                                                             Anonymous said:                                                                 

I have a lot of angsty headcanons about Kaminari specifically so I’ll just spam you with those. He attracts electricity, so he often gets struck by lightning and has almost died from it twice. Kaminari knows people think he’s the traitor and it eats him up inside every day. He’s been ‘propositioned’ by quite a few creeps because he’s pretty and his quirk is, well, what it is. He has nightmares a lot and it causes power outages, he’s terrified his classmates will hate him for it.(1/?(Idk2maybe)            

Sero got into a fight with someone after the sports festival, because how the hell did he make it into UA’S hero course, and Kaminari happens to be with him and he actively threatens the dude who started the fight with his quirk. No one bullies his friends. His overuse of his quirk is slowly killing him, he hasn’t told anyone that it’s destroying his brain. Bakugo reminds him of living in an abusive household but he doesn’t know how to say it so he laughs it off.(2/?(Okaymaybe4wearegettingthere)             

Kirishima and Sero are the first to find out about both the frying brain and the abusive household, and Sero asks Kaminari if he wants to go try something. Kaminari says sure and Sero reserves a training ground for them, and Sero swings around with Kaminari and he hopes it works for Kami the same way it does for him. Sero is smiling because he doesn’t know what else to do, but swinging through the air helps him feel better and free. It helps. But there’s always, always the anxiety (¾)  

the anxiety of ‘Maybe today is the day I fall’, but he doesn’t realize that Kaminari is helping him stay grounded. He won’t fall. Not when he gets to see Kaminari fuller of life than he’s ever been. They land on one of the buildings in ground Beta, and laugh like idiots as it starts to rain. Kaminari’s dying, Sero is a mess, and they just sit there for hours, past the end of their reservation, talking through their anxieties. Kaminari is scared to die. Sero is scared to lose him. (Okay1more4/5)        

Sero promises Kaminari he’ll be there, he’ll do everything he can to help keep him alive as long as possible, and he asks Kaminari how long he has from his last estimate. Kaminari laughs, starting to cry. Six years. Sero tells the Bakusquad, and they promise him that they’ll be there when the time comes. Not villains or Dadzawa could stop them, and finally it does. For only being a hero for three years, he’s made history for kids who have terminal illnesses (ranoutofspacedammit)      

 And the drawbacks of quirks come more into light. Kaminari may not be a great student or hero, but he brought hope to a lot of people, and everyone will miss him. They can’t hear thunder crack without thinking of him, can’t see the golden sunrise without thinking of his smile. Can’t even bear to look at the classic lit section in a bookstore. He saved people and raised awareness, but he wrecked their hearts as well. (Somehow this turned into a near-fic I’m so sorry Hope you’re doing well(Done))       

ANON OMG THANK YOU FOR THIS BASICALLY FIC IM CRYING THERES SO MUCH I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START CRYING   

iamnootthedabmast-r said:                                                                     

Heard you want some angsty headcannons- so Kaminari tends to stay up due to his quirk and he likes to stay in the dormitory lobby, so he just sits on the couch on his phone or just sits there in the dark- but this leads to him finding some secretive angsty stuff about other people in the dormitory for ex; Bakugou comes downstairs and just starts cooking cause he has terrible night terrors and Kaminari just quietly witnesses as Bakugou cries silently while he eats. (Part 1)    

(Part 2) the next morning Kaminari kind of wants to try ask or comfort him but feels rude and awkward so he also kind of struggles with the knowledge of knowing that everyone in his class is a little to a lot of broken.  So yeah, sorry if it’s a little confusing- in awkward when it comes to writing what I want to write…

DUUDE THIS IS SUCH A SAD CONCEPT IF YOU WRITE IT I WILL LEGITERALLY PERISH ON SPOT

                                                                                                                             Anonymous said:                                                   

May we… suggest directly… angsty oneshots? Please feel free to ignore this if you preferred hcs

 (lmao sorry, im not caught up with the manga or anime to know what the first part is referrring to :’D) but ah yeah I’ve seen that headcanon, not too sure how to feel, but it’s out there!                   

[cow5secondchance]

Episode 4 - Honestly I’m a Vindictive Person - Blake

Format: The Penthouse

Eliminated: Mario & Jennet (4-4-4 // 4-4-1)

WILLIAM

NICOLE

These little weirdos don’t know what they’ve just done! Lit a fire under my ASS. I’m so sick of feeling down in this game like every week is something else that I get dragged into and then the one week I’m planning nothing, thinking everything is going smoothly and my number 1 ally goes home after literally being pummeled the whole game. I’m so damn annoyed. I want the switch, I want top of the penthouse or whatever they call it. I want power so I can feel like I can shake things up!!!! 

CAPTAIN

hello everyone i forgot to update yall since the second week so here we go! so we pulled off the plan to evict wyatt and i was so scared that they were going to pick me but i guessed they still love me and that makes me feel bad but urgh.. i just hope they could be able to come back </3 now we're moving to the daisy chain round in which isaac ruined everything after he saved nicole when he should save mario so thats a red flag. anyways, i came up with the plan to save everyone from the greenhouse and pretty people wink wink and i did that so congrats me. anyways, isaac put mario up and i was like maam not mario. no one talked to me about the votes. the alliance with blake, jennet, autumn, nicole, isaac and jarod? i think was made and now blake is upset with me for not telling him everything when i didn't talk about anyone in this vote and i just voted out isaac because i couldn't vote out mario? so white man.... urgh 

these white ppl are freaking out too much

XAVIER

I want to end up in the Penthouse. Put Kaleigh last, so she gets eliminated, as I don't think her Defender will save her. And then the 4 options left, the 6 who voted together now will just have to vote together again. I want those who are really playing to stay longer, even if they are threats to me. It's just more fun. So none of those just popping up to vote :) All plans though. Might delete later haha.

JAROD

NYX

So this week went the way I wanted it to but not without a bunch of complications. So the daisy chain went pretty well I mean we controlled it from beginning to end and I think that we made it obvious enough to where the greenhouse people weren't seen as an immediate target. Then isaac and kaleigh ended up being up for banishment and I was really happy since kaleigh i don't talk to as much and i just voted isaac as well as him being way too chaotic for my liking. When Kaleigh won the uproot though that's when i got nervous because that meant there was gonna be a replacement and of course with my luck it was mario. Now this round changed my outlook on a lot of things because when i was campaigning for mario mario didn't do anything. He wasn't talking to people, he wasn't making bonds, and it's so fucking hard to save someone who won't save themself. There's also the fact that all of sequester voted the exact same way to save isaac which is also suspicious. Granted we in the greenhouse did as well. So this makes me realize that probably sometime soon, i'm gonna have to renege on the greenhouse four because mario clearly isn't gonna help my game much when it's my ass and were gonna be such an obvious target moving forward. Since the vote was 6-4 besides sequester and GH i don't think there's any clear alliances made so depending on who wins power this round i'm gonna have to make the move. the question right now is just how?

I put a lot of effort into winning that penthouse comp so it sucks that I didn't win BUT. If there was anything i trust to put my faith in it's definitely william since we just pulled a big move together so ik he'll at least have my back. I think i have a good chance of surviving this round but i guess we'll see

XAVIER

I AM SO BAD AT CHALLENGES. I reviewed the videos and all the details. But got bogged down with reading Wyatt's question - not the color of the shirt Wyatt is wearing! And just counted the painted art of Jennet, not the total. OH WELL. I have a pretty good relationship with William. I don't think I'll be in the bottom 5. Just depends now on who has the Switch and if it will be used on me. I feel it is with Jarod. Who else would Isaac give it to? Maybe Jarod won't use it on me, I think Jarod would have other targets aside from me at this point. So Greenhouse 4 still here. Mario is ... Mario. Wish Mario were more active. Harder to defend Mario now. I have a good relationship with Lindsay, William, even Kaleigh. Jarod too. Blake we get to talk. Autumn, Nicole and Jennet, I have been reaching out, but they are just so "busy" or maybe I am just not on their priority list. The Greenhouse 4 (well, 3 without Mario), William, Jennet, Lindsay voted together last round. So hopefully if we get to stick together this round, we will be safe too.

BLAKE

im feeling a bit down about my spot in the game! I think im probably a pick to go soon, and I really just need to find my footing in order to make a move in this game gr! last week i was at work, but it seems like william and nyx flipped the vote? but i cant be angry about it w/ william even though i AM so i decided just to rant about everybody ELSE to william and i think my whineyness is really working for me, serving nicole franzel, because i think william wants jennet gone which is like- good cause i think shes in the middle of the game.

CAPTAIN

william won the power! so.. i really don't know the outcomes tbh cause like even though we voted together last round, i didn't really talk to him (or anyone) about the vote. so i'm a little worried. i just hope the bond that we have made on the first round helps a bit with his decision.. please please i just wanna make it..

JAROD

XAVIER

Nice line up for bottom 5, William. Most voted with him last round except for Nicole and Kaleigh. I think he believes Kaleigh won't be saved and so eliminated first. And then Nicole would be the target. I was surprised Isaac gave Nicole the switch. I thought it would go to Jarod. Maybe Isaac thought that too, so shook things up a little. I don't think Nicole will switch me. I would want the kill used, so we don't worry about it later on. But if mostly Greenhouse is on the bottom (if Nicole switches out with Nyx), then we should use save to mess things up.

Why does it feel like I am the only one making strategic plans with these 3? Am I in the wrong alliance? Maybe I can get us 4 to sure Jury and switch to Nicole, Jarod and Blake. Ugh. Tiring.

NYX

So, this week I thought that I would be good I mean william won the penthouse comp I was safe and while the bottom five wasn't desirable i'll take it. Then of course karma comes back to bite me in the ass and the guy i orchestrated a vote out for chose the one person I couldn't have getting the karma got it and i know for a fact based on the fact nicole refuses to hold any type of intelligent conversations with me i'm in trouble

XAVIER

Could it be? Don't want to jinx it but..... https://youtu.be/wKP0hNmg4gE 

BLAKE

I’m so glad I had a literal mental breakdown last week over everything because one thing didn’t go my way. Really embarrassing for me BEBSNSNSK but anyways! Moving on! I’m hoping Kaleigh doesn’t get the boot honestly and it’s a heavy vote, considering I put in a lot of work to get myself to 2nd in the totem poll and had to release a lot of information to William to get here, it would be really unfortunate if I were to somehow end up vulnerable through a twist ! The reason I don’t want Kaleigh gone is because there are 2 other people I would rather go in the bottom (jennet and captain) for flipping. Honestly I’m a vindictive person and LOVE them but, they gotta GO just out of spite truly. I’m really happy with the new alliance of Lindsay myself William and Jarod, and the reason I’m apologizing for being a literal nut job last week is because I made everything about me, I was spiralling because I was having stress with work and everything I think? Who knows? And I really don’t think I’m in as bad of a spot as I thought I was, especially if I can knock out some big players and Isaac or daisy wins the battle back. As for the battle back!  I’ll rank the 4 people out right now on how much I want them to return 1- Isaac 2- Daisy 3- Wyatt 4- Lanie 

XAVIER

I AM IN THE JURY FOR SURE! I mean, I want to win, but for sure I am not pre-jury! Now the double vote. It was a waste of the save. Nicole should have just eliminated Kaleigh. Now it means the second round of Penthouse will be an automatic elimination. That would be tough. I know many are looking at Kaleigh and Mario to vote. But if most put votes on Kaleigh, and a few on Mario, could we still swing the second vote off Mario? And onto a bigger threat? Maybe it will help us more farther along in the game. And who doesn't want a group of 4 lasting longer? There might actually be more votes on Mario than Kaleigh, because of the Greenhouse returnees still being complete. Let me think more on this. One of them is surely going home, do you want to save the other for a bigger threat like Jennet or Lindsay? I am cool with Lindsay. Jennet I haven't forgotten being their nominee.

I am not pre-jury! I know I kept saying pre-merge in the video haha Survivor on the brain. https://youtu.be/SErcWUpfCwo 

CAPTAIN

[this is gonna be a throwback diary room entry!] william put me in the bottom 5.. not surprised i think. i was hoping if our connection we made in the first round was gonna help here but its not. but i don't blame him.. i rlly flop with talking to people the past couple of days teehee. so thats kinda the wake up call for me to like keep talking to people or else i'll be over. i don't have any bad blood with william i think but i also won't forget that he's putting me in the bottom 5. period.

NYX

Ok so, with this heavy vote twist this means one of either Jennet, Lindsay, Mario, Captain, or maybe Kaleigh will be up to be voted for. This sucks because those first 4 are close allies. So now i'm stuck between a rock and a hard place because i'm gonna have to let one of them go. so now i have to pick my loyalties. I would like to get Kaleigh and maybe Mario out because then we'd be forced to work with other people in other alliances but I just don't think Xavier would turn on them like that. I just have to find some kind of excuse to pull this off. 

CAPTAIN

nicole saved kaleigh! thats good for kaleigh! this vote tho is gonna be something.. i don't wanna go so i'm fighting hard. blake told me he's not voting me. i know i can trust jarod, jennet and autumn and the greenhouse people.. so i think i'll be fine here? but idk. anything freaky could happen. for the voting plan, i think GH4 is gonna do kaleigh so thats 4 votes on her. and hopefully, jarod, jennet, autumn, blake and nicole is doing mario so it would be 5 on him. and lindsay told me she won't vote me so i think she might do mario too? since mario isn't talking to ppl. this is always my issue with mario like i love him but he doesn't even want to save himself and i just can't carry him anymore.

AUTUMN

XAVIER

So I was going to try and vote someone else out. I mean majority look like they are voting Mario. So the G4 would be voting Kaleigh. If I could just convince Mario to vote someone else, it would be 2-2. But then Blake messages and says that the G4 are voting together, so is there something. So in order to just make sure Kaleigh gets out and not cause extra drama, I am sticking to Kaleigh. Well, it is kinda obvious I guess. I just told Blake I wanted to help us all get to "merge" since we had the worst placements of all coming in the game. I hope that was convincing enough.

So G4 voted for Kaleigh, I knew it if I switched to Jennet then Jennet and Mario would have gone home. But at least it's out in the open. So I think Sequester+Jennet voted for Mario. And Penthouse+Survivor (the others) voted for Jennet. Good to know where Jarod and Blake really stand, even with all their messages to me. The swing votes are the other 4. Gotta make better relationships with William, Lindsay and Nicole. And what's up Blake? Outing the G4 in the group call? When Sequester is the same, good thing Nyx brought it up. Watch your back, Blake.

LINDSAY

Not thrilled about this vote for many reasons. So, William gets power, and he messages me, right? "I want to work with you me Jarod and Blake" okay that's cool but uhhh.... there's six white people left in the game and that's four of them... so me and jarod message like "???" and we work to stop the noms from being all POC cuz that's gross (the intention was Jennet+Greenhouse/Nicole which uhhhhhh). I talked him into at least nomming Kaleigh. Me and Jarod were under the impression that Kaleigh would go home tonight for general inactivity (also Mario because he's inactive as piss + a greenhouse kid did probably finally need to go tonight) Where did this Jennet vote come from? Who voted for Jennet? Why are they suddenly a target? I dunno man I couldn't fight it much because I was out with my friend while we were deciding who to vote for but I'm squicked out on every level right now. Clearly people weren't telling the truth to me on top of everything else.... that's not how you win my trust. My god, am I about to goat for Jarod? I think Mario/Jennet are going home but not happy about this all around. 

[rqs902]

.

for a split second i actually thought tencent had bought them gifts but LOL oh its their parents that makes more sense 

ofc zzn would be with ljt’s groupppp hahahha aw im glad nana got to work with a group she had previously said she’d wanted to collab with. 

lol why do i feel like langlang is bringing all his friends and family onto this show LOL 

i cant tell if i like xiao li without bangs better, but a change isnt bad, gives him a new look 

oof the way xiao li says “im someone who doesn’t have a father” being raised by his mom and aunt and just remembers broken plates from his childhood, and left at 13?? its been 6 years?? wild 

and hyt commiserating talking about how admirably strong he thinks his mom is too but then im like wait a minute... they’re probably the two that contributed the most to making this song (well mostly xiao li) but theyre the ones whose parents didnt come, that’s sad :(

i respect xiao li rocking this bright colored hoodie in a sea of black LOL

wow i think he’s saying that music should have a personal touch to it, tell a story, and even tho growing up sometimes there are moments that aren’t happy, when you look back it may still be a treasured moment. is he talking about the broken plates? wow this just got real deep real fast and im just so intrigued by his artistic mind wow im just grateful that his group mates are really letting him drive their musical direction. i mean thats part of why hyt chose him, for his composition abilities, so im not surprised but its really so cool that his group is helping him tell such a personal story through their music 

pushu complimenting xiao li’s guitar composition in the demo and xiao li’s like im the one playing it :’) xiao li is really so talented wow

wait why did they do the elims in the middle of them making their own compositions tho? that just makes it sad that the groups that didnt make it didnt get to show their music and the reshuffled groups are at a huge disadvantage they only have 3 days left?? the timing seems bad

so basically xiao li did everything except hyt made his own drum part and they all supposedly wrote the lyrics together 

wow this song is.... oof. im still trying to process 

on a side note, i was kinda worried how mz would fit in this group but its great that he can be their bass player! and tbh im still kinda questioning xiao xiong’s singing, like it still sounded kinda pitchy to me but maybe its at least improving like gem said lol

but back to the song, when asked why a song about family isnt more warm, the way xiao li said life can be cruel but he still sees it as beautiful when he looks back and he still loves his family. i think thats why this song creates such conflicting emotions in me. its sad and even spiteful but also touching. you can feel how lonely and lost he’s been in life, but he recognizes he’s still loved. theres a lot of complicated emotions presented in the space of a few minutes (which shows how real and personal this song is) and i think i need to listen a few more times to help me digest his story. i feel like the messy, discordant chords in his piano solo represent his inner feelings and im grateful and amazed that he was willing to share his vulnerabilities so openly. 

Oof I read xiao li's weibo post about this song and it's so poetic I had to use the dictionary but oof it just made me think of hyt saying it seems like xiao li has been through a lot. I'm grateful he says he isnt lonely with the family members he loves (again sad they couldnt come support him...) I'm wondering what the meaning behind his words is when he says he still has candy and can forever be a child. At least he says he'll be happy.

OOF continuing with another sad story, man maybe its why that group of kids are so close, xu yang also talking about being raised by his mom (and zk too) from meager beginnings. kinda sad he cant perform the song himself but at least his friends can publicize it for him? i do feel like it wouldve been even more emotional for xu yang to have been in the perf himself :\ they did make it together but writing the lyrics shapes the whole message of the song. glad to see zk and jym are on good terms still and xu yang supported them to perform the song. 

well im glad to see that the adults are able to whip the kids in qiang ge’s group into shape so muji and wjy can work together lol seems like qiang ge’s learning from them and gaining confidence. oof qiang ge’s father being responsible for a family with 5 kids and always getting sick

happy to see mty so happy on stage and qiang ge so happy to see his parents and muji being so gentle with his little brother 

im tearing up at wjy talking about his grandma’s noodles and then qiang ge being all “arent my noodles good too?” I CRACKED UP HAHHAHAHAHHAHA

me watching xiao zhi’s group: wow xiao zhi is such a great older bro

AW muji’s little bro sitting at muji’s desk with the rest of the kids backstage !!! and then high fiving the kids going on stage !!!  

zhang yang’s always seemed a bit like an awkward turtle but you can tell he really loves his group mates, its sweet

oh ljt’s comment about parents gradually becoming like kids and the kids have to learn to 包容 them.... thats so real 

did nannan just walk in with a SUP DUDE.... HAHAHHAHAHAHA

nice to see jym has found peace within their group haha and not surprised ljt’s dad likes ljt’s music but zzn’s dad thinks zzn’s music is too loud L O L 

lol they said liu yang wrote the music and szb and ljt wrote the lyrics, then how come the credits have only ljt for the music and lyrics?? 

lol ljt’s dad’s singingggg hahahhah 

i teared up at szb’s mom’s words bc it must be hard for her to blame herself for everything

LOL JYM’S DAD !!! they seem to have a fun relationship. and i love how ljt saw jym sit down and immediately went to check to make sure he was okay. 

oof rip wu xing’s dad being like uh so we cared more about your older brother when you were growing up oops

but wu xing’s song may be my favorite from this ep. theyre not my favorite group, but i like this song.  

LOL zjy’s dad seems fun, why do i suddenly get the feeling thats how i imagine ljt would be like as a dad L O L 

oof hyt saying hes not surprised his dad didnt show up but he felt like something was wrong when he mom said she was sick. then asking whether parents should hide something like hospitalization from their kids... thats rough

aw muji’s mom feeling so sad for hyt and crying when saying muji would also feel like something was wrong if she hadnt shown up.. aw 

honestly i cant tell if i like muji in particular, bc there are times where i feel like his personality seems a bit unique in a way im not sure if he’d be easy to get along with, but i respect that hes repping his culture and staying strong and seems very close with his family. 

xiao xiong’s cantonese tongue twisters with the badminton LOL that made me laugh, he just seems so pure

man im sad that xiao zhi’s group is least popular, so they’ll likely be broken up. MAN if xiao zhi gets eliminated ill be sad......... hopefully he’ll get saved and jus reshuffled bc it may be cool to see him in a different context. itll be weird to imagine him as a side addition rather than the main pillar of a group tho. 

yall at this rate hyt’s group is gonna win this competition and idk how i feel about that even tho i like them. 

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE THREE

“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash

HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)

ARIA

https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8

JOEY

WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:

I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week

SAIRA

i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!

JEV

I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out

JAKE

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.

i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 

im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk

at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period

ARIA

yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected

-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio

-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)

-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao

-joey monty close

-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh

-josh emma me alliance

-JOEY RECORDS CALLS

-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)

-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them

-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created

-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet

-jacob josh have a pregame

-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame

-josh kiki close

-josh thinks saira is a social threat 

-josh prefers jev over nathan

-told monty to talk to jake more

-told joshua jacob is the most connected person

-got back to nash gina doesnt like her

-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance

-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)

-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance

-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes

-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance

-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:

 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 

Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh

god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay

1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)

2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)

3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)

VERY BIG GAP

4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)

5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)

6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)

7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)

8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)

9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)

10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)

ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT

11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)

12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)

13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)

14. Kiki (my favorite furry)

15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)

So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!

JEV

I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

KIKI

https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA

BRIANNA

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 

i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((

JEV

So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina

JEV

So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel

JEV

Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.

NASH

sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.

EMMA

If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??

JEV

So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:

JOSH

hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.

today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!

the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.

if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.

some other fun events going on:

jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.

i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.

my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)

anyways that's all for now x 

ARIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE

someone help

JAKE

https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du

JEV

Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:

JEV

So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.

JEV

The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.

NASH

this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 

ARIA

Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-

IN TIME LINE ORDER

-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked

-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!

-Saira and Josh are close

- VIDEO DR GOES HERE

-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance

-Jev prefers gina out

-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls

-Jev and Jake are close

-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before

-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki

-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her

-jev was the reason i was almost otb

-I WAS ALMOST OTB

-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out

-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary

-Nash and Nick are close 

-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking

-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty

-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu

So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 

I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s

[ts-akhmim]

Episode 12 | “Beauty got problems and Brawn got problems”- Autumn

wow. just wow. i sure did just do that and im so proud. i proved to myself im a deserving winner tonight. i will fight to the death to get my allies to the end because lets be real i sure am not making it KJSDFLASFLA.

i was going to start this confessional out in a celebratory tone but YOU KNOW WHAT I STILL AM BECAUSE WE JUST DID THAT. I typically like to be my own biggest hater and drag myself in my confessionals a lot just as a way to clock myself and try to see the other perspective, but BITCH I KNOW I SNAPPED THIS ROUND AND IF YOU DONT THINK I DID LEMME HIT YOU WITH SOME FACTS; FACT: I CORRECTLY USED MY ADVANTAGE AND WON IMMUNITY DURING WHAT WAS A PERTINENT ROUND https://media.tenor.com/images/6c2f88af1bd5a24853849df11a566947/tenor.gif FACT: UPON FINDING OUT I HAD IMMUNITY I KNOW DEVON WAS COMING TO ME TRYING TO KEEP ME UNDER HIS WING, OH YEAH ADAM, JUST VOTE IN THE MINORITY, AND GO ALONG WITH BEING AT THE BOTTOM, AND IT WAS M E DECIDING I DIDNT WANT TO DO THAT AND SPILLING THE TEA THAT LED TO GETTING AN OUTCOME I WANTED https://media.tenor.com/images/6c2f88af1bd5a24853849df11a566947/tenor.gif FACT: it was ME who also went to autumn/ali and started planting seeds of doubt in their minds about jake and it's turning out it's helped me solidify my position with them better https://media.tenor.com/images/6c2f88af1bd5a24853849df11a566947/tenor.gif FACT: It's also still me who's aligned with 2 or 3, if you include jake, of the biggest targets left in the game and i already have augusto and amir sliding in my pms trying to play pity me boo hoo hoo like gorl plea im not buying it but yall wanna keep singing kumbaya? well ill sing the encore and be twice as fake as yall (i DO love them both as people just as a disclaimer but from a game perspective? they're beasts!) https://media.tenor.com/images/6c2f88af1bd5a24853849df11a566947/tenor.gif ok, boasting over, time to hop off cloud nine and get back to reality because FACT: we all just made a big move, so the target on all of us, including myself, just went up, FACT: i could easily be delusional and maybe i had NOTHING to do with this blindside SJDFA but lemme bask in my fake glory anyway itll be funny to read after at least... FACT: The war has truly only just begun, that was a great victory but if me/ali/autumn are really in it like we're saying, we may still have another idol on our side, but we're gonna need more than that, it's kinda funny we're one brain, one brawn, one beauty and i think that speaks volumes i truly love these gals and think this is a good game route for me. some people might think it's foolish of me to align with the big threats and go deep with them, but who's to say im not worthy of being in their company? if it wasnt for my social connection with devon he wouldve never told me the plan, and then autumn is the smart one so she kept us composed and together, and then ali was the brawn he had the idol and got the job done. So im gonna just try and stick with this for now, hopefully they feel the same and dont try to oust me right away because then ill look like a whole fool and a half OOP, and ill plaster my fake smiles on for everyone else and kiki it up we can haha hehe all day long but i wont hesitate to vote them out because trust and believe. 

Last Day 30 was my last day playing TS: Guyana, so this is a nice feeling to still be here. But now the fun kicks in. Jakey helped orchestrate the Devon blindside with the Ali idol, so I guess we're even. And now, assuming Jakey is still actually with me, which I think he is, I think we can run this game for the longrun. He has access to Ali, Autumn, and Adam and I have access to the three Beauties. I truly see this being beneficial for the both of us in terms of keeping one another safe and allowing us to get to the final six unharmed. Final six is important for me. I'm not sure if I've admitted this in an earlier confessional or not, but I have the Legacy Advantage (thank you Jordan Pines!) that I can use at six. So I just need to survive two more tribals. If I can do that, I have a seat in the final five, probably two more rounds to survive before getting to FTC, and then I have a shot. I really need to start building a resume if I want to win this game, but I think I have a chance. I really need to get Ali and Autumn out in these next three rounds. If I can do that, I see myself being able to make the end with the likes of Jakey, Kendall, Augusto, and maybe Adam (Amir will become a threat at five or six I think) and then I have at least a shot at the win, but I really need to keep my head down, keep the social game going, and make a move or two here.

so. i think i have some explaining to do JKLASDFA huh? i was on calls for the like three hours before tribal so i didn't really confess at all.. in fact i think in my last confessional i said that we were voting 4-3-3 which did not happen at all so i think i need to fill in some gaps huh? so... i have known since like 11pm EST yesterday that i was getting votes tonight. devon told, adam told me and then told autumn, but then autumn didn't want to tell me until later in the day which i honestly do think was fair so we weren't spiralling for hours. we were all sus of jake all day (and lowkey i still am?)... like i dont know when his energy because so shady, plus devon may have told adam that jake was in on the plan? plus he kept saying stuff like the vote has gone "back to kendall" and kept pushing me not to play the idol... something does not add up right with that. anyway so that demonic group of five voted for me, and lied SO much to make me leave with my idol? like why not just make me paranoid, leak the vote to adam or jake then vote autumn get me to waste an idol and then autumn leaves? now that would've been a good move hello?! but that group does not know how to blindside, idols have sabotaged their plans twice and amir/augusto should consider themselves lucky that they are still in the game. also kendall fought me at tribal because i was being cocky... but she literally tried to blindside me into leaving with an idol hello?! i appreciate that she thought she was going, but she is zero to too much way too quick. augusto can literally suck my ass our call was him and his bad excuse for jury management, like can he at least be like amir and pretend to want to work with me? anyway so moving forwards, i wanna vote out kendall or augusto this round. amir can stick around because he at least pretends to wanna work with me plus he is a threat too. idek i just want all the fake people in this tribe gone. i will not vote for adam, autumn or jake. i will vote for any of the others, im not fussed about the order in which i do so. im living on borrowed time in this game and im going to make it count

Sorry this is two parts I thought my friend was gonna die lol but she's fine. Remember kids, there's no dick worth dying over and a straight guy rejecting you is a blessing in disguise these days (considering the alternatives). 

Now on with the show hahaha 

https://drive.google.com/open?id=1-AkqQGDYzlccP1VFwpPNo-aCQPFmoj9Z https://drive.google.com/open?id=1bVcBqq0JL2-ybgTiS2vOrYURbCG0kIxh

thots on final 8: augusto: would cut me to win, literal love of my life, super kind and empathetic and genuinely good person, i think his social game is fire and i think he has a way with people, and downplays how smart and cutthroat he really is constantly, but i love the kid so much ali: the brit has to die ali again: okay im kidding i like him a lot but tbh hes a smart fucking guy, i think hes super cool and and also a badass with that idol play, hes a force but he has to go soon autumn: lana stan, coolest girl around, queen of the social game, queen of likability, queen of controlling rounds and letting others take the hit, a damn threat, she could win this game   tj: sweetheart, we need each other in the game rn, i need need need to secure his loyalty adam: hes kinda crazy but he has a good heart, kinda just following ali and autumn rn, not gonna win in the end kendall: i have a soft spot for this crackhead, she deserves the world, probably cant win at the end but im happy i met her, shes on my side and a vote i can use moving forward jakey: love him to death would die 4 him, would beat me in the end and at immunities also the fact that kendall augusto and i are all still here is so fucking funny, like bitch how kejwnfkewjnfkejnwfkjnewkfnewk cockroaches

So numbers on surface Jakey - adam - autumn - Ali Kendall - Amir - Augusto - tj Round 5: Adam - Ali - autumn Amir - kendall - Augusto In the middle: jakey - tj So I just have to work on them 

when i tell you ive been hooting and hollering what the fuck is going on in the survivor on this day, who the hell would've thought id win my third individual immunity in one season, gorl that is probably the most 2020 thing to happen in this game. although two of them pretty much were dumb luck afdjks either that or maybe im doing a little better than i think i truly dont know, and the touchy subjects clocked me on THAT as; what was it they said, 'the person they forget is in the game' and also 'least aware of their place' okay well yes im AWARE ive BEEN lost and asking for help this whole game gorl! But that's great, that's how i want people to view me, because uh... i just won 3 of these things now and that alone is reason to target me, granted im doing my best to play it up like dont worry! im just a dumb dumb! and clearly theyre eating that up like crazy, because it's both just the truth but also strategy if i keep playing it up, so watch out meryl, adam's in town! also LOVE that i knew i was gonna get most likely to have the idol i dont know how many times i have to say it IM INNOCENT AND BEING FRAMED FOR A FOOL and ooh dont even get me started on all the other tea it spilled, i actually got the LEAST of the bad things, i guess i kinda exposed myself because i made most of my chops at amir, augusto, and tj oop, so they probably didnt like that but they really left me no choice strategically, screw with me, i screw back, simple as that. As far as the vote too ummm.....it's been quiet tonight on my end so hope that doesnt make me a fool because this time last vote was a disaster, at this point im still thinking i need to stick with ali and autumn because this vote is so pertinent, after this a solid 4  can take it, or get as far as we can because im always keeping my options open OOP, but for the most part i do want to stay true to my good judys for now, but i know someone between amir/augusto/kendall has an idol and if they were smart theyd use it this round, so i need to convince the others of this because im sure its gonna happen since they dont think ali has one anymore hopefully but who knows, if it were up to me we'd vote augusto or tj this vote. I think amir has the idol and i think he's going to play it for himself this round or i could see augusto playing it for him, so if i can make anyone belive that very realistic scenario, we can get one of the ones theyd least expect just to ensure us the numbers for next round, but what do i know, they just forget im in the game anyway! so hopefully tomorrow someone tries to give me the tea and we get a plan together or else i spilled all the tea last round for nothing which is worst case scenerio 

yesterday was a lot. I went an apology tour to everyone involved in my blindside and honestly it was annoying. the fact that augusto basically got me to apologise to him on our call when he blindsided me was irritating, like he just let me sit there and take fault when the point of the call was for him to take accountability. talking to him is like talking to 2018 me, he has such social ability, but he just takes zero accountability and is just so infuriatingly wishy-washy. he is all of my worst attributes as a player rolled into one. i also... almost won immunity? which is crazy, but I just found yesterday and the way immunity played out so frustrating, but I've spoken about it enough in my host chat enough. just know i feel robbed, slighted and if I get rocked out this round when i should have immunity. i will throw a fuss again SAJDKFLAS. anyway so this vote is gonna be a mess. tj and autumn now have a blood feud, Kendall and jake came to a head this round. so that's four people whose name i hopefully am not their number #1 target, plus i don't think adam is targetting me? but this vote is going to be a mess, because it very very easily could be 4-4, where there is an idol on both sides of the trench. i have a gut feeling amir and his sock puppets are going to vote autumn. it makes sense, tj wants her gone and the beauties need him reeled in. so i think im going to have to idol autumn, but that is risky because if the 4 vote jake... im going to rocks, and if they vote me, im reliant on jake going to rocks. but i just wanna send all these people backing, especially augusto. amir i'm trying to shake him that me and him have to stick together, but i also could vote for him. i literally just want to make F7 and to vote someone who just voted me out. that is literally all i want. if i go home i will be literally devastated

So like… there’s the dream and there’s the harsh reality which is something this round really talk me. The dream is obviously me winning, making all these big moves, and doing THAT. However, my reality? Could very well be that people don’t see me as a winner at all and it makes me a little disappointed but I gotta prove them all wrong. The vote last round being Ali was honestly mostly my doing and I’m proud of that. My ideal boot order is Autumn/Ali then Jakey then Autumn/Ali and that is GOING to happen because I’m putting that into the universe. When it comes to Autumn and Ali, I would rather Ali go but I think the safest bet while still having a target leave would be Autumn. In a way too, I do know Amir wants Ali out moreso alongside Jakey but I wanna separate my game from Amir so yeah. Also Adam calling me a fake ass bitch even tho my drunk ass was telling him I liked him was a gag… but oh well.. Nothing grinds my gears more than people thinking I’m not being genuine with how I feel towards them but if that’s what he thinks, maybe that’s what he’ll get idk… i feel petty and mad for some reason over it… BUT ANYWAY, I just want to survive this vote. I hope Kendall doesn’t go but she also said she wants me to win over Amir so yay?

If I die, I just wanna say I regret nothing and I have full confidence that the right person will win this season. So not TJ, Augusto, or Amir lmaaaaooo. Amir entering the two time winner chat??? Over my dead fucking body. If there's one thing Imma do it's poison a jury

Ali or Autumn... who shall we vote? Stay tuned!

Is Jess really Canadian... stay tuned!

god. today is gonna be another nailbiter and i want to confess first. so the plan is to idol autumn and vote out kendall, which sucks because i do now like kendall. i just think its the safest way of avoiding them playing an idol i guess, i don't even know. i just am sick of fighting in this game every single round me and autumn have had to fight to make it past. the fact jake is throwing a fit in my pms becuase im not idoling him is infuriating because... i'd love to idol myself? like? anyway im over it. if i go home, i hope tj can finally stop his blind fixation on autumn and i, that augusto can actually be accountable for one entire thing, amir can stop his pity party and show awareness for his threat level and that kendall... well actually kendall is fine. i just feel like im a mum trying to get all my kids to fit in a minivan and to put their seatbelts on, like can they get it together.

I don’t think anyone is ready for this round or at least what’ll come of it... I’m expecting an explosion or a mess given Jakey thinks he’s staying, TJ has been lied to, and hopefully Autumn or Adam leave next... its all a mess. If Jakey goes, I’m planning a 2-2-2 split between Autumn and Adam where we maybe get Autumn out but Adam leaving doesn’t hurt either. 

me with biggest villian, biggest backstabber, thinks they are running the game, is running the game, and is gonna win at the end http://prntscr.com/ss4h5q

literally god demolished and brutalized worse than anyone in this game tonight in that touchy subjects yet I’m also the one comforting like half the tribe over their answers even tho I ADKWNWQJN WAS ATTACKT LIKE this cast literally thinks im a psychopath fjebwfjenkn but im not gonna play victim over my superlatives i just have to use this target on my back strategically 

I want destruction AHHHHHHHHHHhhHhHhHhHhHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Okay so, they think me or Augusto have the idol, so they can vote kendall, to ensure our idol isn’t played and that me and Augusto and tj are forced into rocks, and im just like trying to get everyone to stop replying to ali cuz hes smart and he will psychoanalyze and figure out who to play the idol on and like he has to play it on autumn and not himself so pls pls pls kkjnkjenfs let this work

[askguyslikeus]

oh shit yall send lots of questions hoo nelly answering almost all of them under the cut ,,, im gunan try and answer more technical ones first then fun ones and ones about the mod later so u dont gotta scroll all the way to the bottom for the good deets

Hi! I'm still kinda new to the blog and I was wondering what are the 'do and do-not' kind question I should do? Because im sure theres always that one ask thats just Innapropiated, like that one of Michael 'taking advantage og high Jeremy' that was just not cool.  i got this ask a lot so ill be clear with yall. im just not a big angst fan? so sending michael asks about his anxiety nonstop and about how he had a panic attack in the bathroom over and over again wasnt that fun. usually if it pertains the musical though you should be find sending an ask about it? but sometimes i get asks that are like “jeremy ur nothing and how does it feel knowing u fucked everything up” like homie how i think its feels? how u think hes gunna react to that? i made this blog to negate a lot of negativity in my own life so i can promise u im going to be answering asks mostly positive always forever. that being said tho i sometimes get asks pertaining to a few things that ive dealt with in the past and these topics make me very very uncomfortable. dont send asks about these topics please. this is the no no list

-self harm, cancer, suicide, rape, parent death, car accidents, sudden death.

What was your inspiration for this blog? hoo boy well,,, ultimately i thought of them rooming together and got emotional and made a huge list of headcanons and was like ,,, why not run an askblog for a bit ill just abandon it after three asks lets have some fun. but somehow im still here and i got sucked in by the complexity of michael and jeremy. i know that sounds kinda silly but just, as someone who is dealing with a lot of similar things, like dependency issues and abandonment issues and depression and anxiety, having these fun functioning character to explore was such a gift for me. i believe honestly thats why im still here and doing this. being able to try and portray a healthy relationship and a healthy way of coping and growing has helped me a lot this past month and given me an outlet i didnt have before. TBH THO the main reason i made this blog if imma be real with u guys id because i didnt like the treatment of a lot of these issues in the fandom. it made me very upset to see depression used as an plot device and michaels dependency issues treated as romantic so i wanted to make a blog that had little to no angst. ANYWAYS somehow im still here ,,, gvrkjvrnkjfd sorry i rambled

honestly I just wanna say first that I love his blog and your art and you're so cool and kind!! a question would be (I'm not sure if you've answered this before or not) but is there like an on going story here, or is it mostly just answering questions with the characters set in this universe? (if that makes sense I'm sorry!) thank you, you're super awesome! ❤️  djrnjg first off thank u so much aaaa,, ive kind of answered this before but its ok its been a while since then! but um i do kinda have a story but how howdy i sure am dragging my feet. the story isn a hUGE OVERARCHING EPIC OF WOE AND THIS PERSON IS UPSET AND THIS PERSON IS MAD AT THIS PERSON its just michael and jeremy getting together. i have a plan and ive talked to a few people on how i want it to happen but ive gained like ,,,, 6,000 followers since then and im kinda nervous BUT ILL DO MY BEST but also please understand that i do this for fun for myself and if i dont get to it im so so so sorry woops

i know this has been said before but i'm really really happy w how you're handling so many aspects of their characters. i.e. michael being trans, michael and jeremy's anxiety, michael's dependency issues, and other stuff i'm too tired to think of. you made the characters have even more depth than they did in the play and i'm rly grateful for the way you're dealing w my favorite boys. (also your richjake is suuuper adorable) ahhhhhh thank u so much? i talked a bit about this on my main but im really glad people are happy with my decision on this blog because im suPER SUPER NERvous anytime i post an ask dealing with these things. (ask hachi or nate i always message them like freaking out and send them my scripts and asks and wait for them to tell me its ok before i post it omg) also like i talked about before i love,,, having these fun stoner gamer boys to explore these issues with. im honestly shocked by how many people also deal with dependency issues because when i first listened to the musical i was so overwhlemed by the song michael int he bathroom because i had never heard someone basically write “dependency issue: the song” and it felt so so so good to realize i wasnt alone in this pit of despair i fall into so easily aha. but im!! glad everyone is ok with this wild ride im on right now (also thank u so much i struggle writing rich and jake but i get so emotional cause they would TOTES call each other babe)

how come you just use sketch form for most of your drawing (sketches and uses sketch for the final result)? im ,,, not really sure what this is asking but i thnk its along the lines of why do i only sketch my answers?? and i do that because dude do u see how often i post and how lONG some of them are. i made this blog for fun and i love doing comics but i hate lineart and coloring and if i tried to churn out finished pics for every post id defs have given up a few asks in,, shrugs

I want to say I love your little comics they're so funny! How long does it take you to make a comic? Are any of them based on your experiences? Ok have a nice day!  thank you! i love my little comics too! it usually takes me anywhere from an hour to five hours if im dragging my ass or talking on discord while im drawing. it can be kinda exhausting but since i took my break ive also been like, starting long comics one day and finishing them another day which, before i would do it all in one sitting then post it hahha. AS FOR EXPERIENCE the first half of the lifeguard comic was based on real life! we were stuck stoned up there for like an hour or two? but we didnt have anyone to help us but we got down eventually!! the wendys comic is also something i did because man!! i need to compliment food workers if they do a good job!! ummmmm just like jenna i also have a friend that said HAHA BYE and moved to cali and she is also lIVING IT UP and doing really well for herself and shes very independent and shes very inspiring to me! hmm i think thats it besides i used to have movie nights with my dad all the time too except we would watch my fave animated movies and sometimes lord of the rings cause my dad loved that

What kinds of things can we NOT ask ? What kinds of things do you WANT us to ask ? i covered the what not to ask in the first question so!!! um if my askbox is open and u want to respond to previous asks ive answered for the boys that would be so so so rad. sometimes im done with a certain ask and i have nothing to add but sometimes ive got more to say but am looking for an opportunity! that being said it made me really happy that i got a lot of asks about pj? shes not going to the main focus of any more asks but!!! i was nervous to introduce her and im glad u guys like her shes fun to write. but overall just general asks i can make a big ol fun story out of so!! dont worry too much about what to ask, if its something ud ask a real person and not like “lol what if ur dad died” ur gunna be fine probably

Hi! Not a question but your blog is so sweet and refreshing! I actually really appreciate that you refuse angst, that stuff tends to rub me the wrong way in fandoms... Keep taking good care of these boys ! gggg thank u!!! it means a lot to me that a lot of people are backing me up on this! i mean if u are an angst fan there are a lot of askblogs that explore that!! so its not in short supply bmc askblog fandoms got something for everyone

Which drawing program do you use?? i use paint tool sai and my tablet is a cintiq !!

this isn't really related to the faq but that bakunawa boy reference was great I LOVE THAT FIC MAN!!! the line was originally a little diff in that ask but i changed it cause ,,,, i could,,,,

an art style question. how do you keep the design of characters consistent from frame to frame? my characters they look a lil different every time I draw em (or a lot different) and it tends to disrupt the flow of my comics/animations ohh boy hoo wee props for doing animations im too scared to give that a whirl but!! it helps that i draw all the panels for an ask on one canvas! so if my next panel is going to be the same character in the same spot just in a diff pose i keep the lower layer on just at low opacity so i can use it as a ref! that helps me a lot!

Sorry if I'm nosy or rude, but are you reflecting Micheal Anxiety, Panic attacks and depence? iii think this is asking if i reflect my own issues onto them boys? and if so then yes i do. i dont place any of my own personality or anything on the boys but i do use them as a way to help me learn how to cope with my own shit and i try to deal with their issues in the healthiest way possible while also keeping in mind they are flawed individuals aaa

what are your pronouns??? and maybe your main blog??  im a cis girl so she/her is good! and my main is squigglegigs! also that being said IF YOU SEE THE USERNAME SQUIGGLEGIGS ANYWHERE JUST?? ASSUME ITS ME?? i have a twitter and an instagram and my tumblr account 

((Hello mod will Michael and Jeremy eventually someday get together. I love them.)) if all goes according to plan yes! if i get overwhelmed and stop having fun on this blog then no! sorry thems the breaks but! i do want them to get together so HOPEFULLY

going off on that confrience on pornogrefy for birds, Im geussing jeremy has played Hatoful Boyfriend. am I wrong? well it wasnt intended as that ref and i dont know anything about hatoful boyfriend but i can see jerm finding it and playing it so, sure homie! the pornography for birds thing is a my brother my brother and me reference! i love that show and them boys so give it a scope!

I'm crying bcuz Michael said he's in love with Jeremy and it's beautiful yeah that boy is DEEP IN love with his bro bro

Any advice for running an ask blog?? (Ps i love this blog keep it up) personally whats worked for me so far is doing just sketches for art. honestly ive been able to work so much more and post so much more often while also trying to work on my expressions and poses! also taking my own experiences and shaping them to fit the characters has been SO MUCH FUN. th most important thing tho is,,, dont overwork urself dude. if ur having a fun time it shows. if ur just forcing urself to churn out material and its not fun? like shit we doing this for free dont push urself? idk idk overall being looser with my art and writing the dialogue before hand has been the most helpful for me for this askblog! ive run a bunch before including @ask-maz and ive run that sporadically for ,, three or four years? its so funny cause u can see my art style juMP AROUND SO MUCH but i love that blog and i only update it like every other month or so but?? i still like doing it and no on likes those posts but it makes me smile so ANYWAYS

~ok from here on its mostly just me replying to nice messages or people asking me personal questions that dont pertain to askguyslikeus so!!~

I just wanted to say I really really love your blog and just your art in general!! Keep up the good work and hope you're having fun! thank u!!! i am having fun and im glad u enjoy it!!

What other musicals do you like? :0  i really like heathers A LOT. i also like doctor horrible i know thats not technically a musical but i just relistened to it and im emotional. i like dear evan hansen but it makes me really sad so i can only take it in moderation! ummm rent? chicago?? music man? now im just naming musicals i was in rip. being in a musical fandom is a new thing to me? i was really into heathers last year but didnt really interract with the fandom at SO THIS IS SUPER NEW?? ive never been into a musical as much as im into bmc and heathers tho

tell us a little bit about urself!! u seem v cool i am squigs or fork!! im 24 and work fulltime as a barista at starbucks! i get high on the beach with my friend gwen a lot and drink wayy to many slushies, my tv shows are brooklyn nine nine and bobs burgers right now! i table at conventions sometimes and sell my art as merch and whatnot and i cosplay as a hobby as well. im pretty boring but i draw a lot and always carry my big sketchbook with me and im pretty sure its given me back issues BUT OH WELL HAHA also i am very not cool THE TRUTH COMES OUT

Who do you most relate to from bmc and why? like ,,, a mix of michael and christine with a sprinkle of jeremy i guess ahaha i relate to michaels dependency issues and overarching positive attitude and love of music, i relate to christines bright disposition and the need to not stick to one set thing? like she loves theater cause she can be sO MANY PEOPLE and like same homie thats why i cosplay. and jeremys need to be likes while also ability to put himself out there is very relatable. i also identify strongly with his dad issues idk idk whats good

Also -- just thank you for how you handled all the panic attack and anxiety attack asks. I used to deal with anxiety attacks multiple times a day and it just was really nice that it was positive and not them having one. Thank you, sincerely. ahhhhhh ur so welcome i,,, have anxiety and it sucks and i deal with panic attacks like everyday at work so i dont really wanna come home and draw someone having one i guess? im glad its helping other people too tho!

Dude- I love your art? Actually so much? It's... I love it. The whole sketch-ish way your art style is, and the way you color, and the expressions! I'm so glad I found your work - you've given me so much inspiration. Keep doin what you're doin and I hope you have a good day! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANytime any one compliments my expressions i die cause i legit made this blog to help with that as well ,,, like dam

im lvoe ur art style b o i :0 !!!!!!

Mod, I love you so much I love you you have my soul and my love and my eternal gratitude thank you and I love you (This is the guy who was excited about PJ on your ig live stream a while ago and I love you) !!!!!!!!! im so happy u like my content omg and that u like pj im so glad!! shes a good bean

I just wanna say... I'm crying over that post about Michael and his anxiety? cuz I know how it can feel that you're only your flaws and weaknesses, but Michael just tells that to screw off in the most wonderful way and I'm?? thank you so much for that post, I bookmarked it for future times when I can't look past my depression... honestly, that post made my day (along with every other post on this blog), thank you for being such a lovely part of this fandom ,,,, im,,,, im scared of a lot of this fandom tbh but if i can be something good that come out of it and my love of these boys and desire to show them functioning together in a healthy way can help other people its so much more than i ever thought id ever be able to do. i am blown away everyday by the support ive been given on this blog and i might be crying right now because i never thought id be able to touch other people like this and i just. im really glad yall are here with me for all this.

(To the mod: You are a beautiful person that I highly respect. I love this blog and what you set out to do. thanks for giving something that makes me smile and gives me something to look forward to everyday, keep up the good work! ❤ ) hey im still crying from the previous ask aaaaa im honestly so emotional

what are ur true feelings for wendy's??? i fucking love wendys man thats some top tier fast food right there

what fast food restaurant do you think has the best nuggets WENDYS HANDS DOWN

do you have a favorite movie? paranorman makes me very nostalgic and ive seen it like eighty times and used to watch it with my dad a lot and i love it

I would just like you to know that your Wendy's comic prompted me to pull the same thing with a bakery in the town I'm visiting and the baker got so excited and happy, so thank you for making that comic because I made that woman's day. GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE COMPLIMENT ME WHEN IM WORKING DUDE LIKE IM SO GLAD IT MADE U DO THIS!!! IM SMILING REALLY BIG!!

chocolate milk or strawberry milk? or plain? woops i hate milk im so sorry

do u love michael mell with all of ur heart, mod?  i really truly do man what a fucking good ass character

hi squigs i love you! i love your content too and i hope u have a good day pal :>  WHAT A SWEET BEAN!!! THANK YOU?? OMG

I'm just saying that recent ask you did with Michael really hit me hard because I really related to it and I started crying because it made me realize that I've been pining my self worth on everything my anxiety causes and I'm so much more than that. Thank you, so much for that I really needed it because I'm in a really bad place right now. <3 -for the mod i legit cry everytime i get asks or dms like this cause once again the idea that im helping other people is so ovwehelming i love you??? i let myself just be”depressed” for ahwile and by that i mean i just,, let my sadness consume me and i was scared of getting better cause the sadness was all i knew for so long and just. its so easy to think u are ur illness but you are so much more. soooo much more man.

I relate A Lot to Michael so the way you portray him in the blog is really good, and I think it's really awesome you refuse to like?? do terrible stuff and answer bad questions just bc people wanna see that. You run this blog really well 👌  AHHHH THis is the biggest compliment thank u so much ,,, i get real anxious bout this blog soemtiems but then yall send me sweet things like this and its worth it man

Hey mod, just know you're a really cool person. Thanks for running this blog in the first place. Keep doing the great work.  thank you!!!! for ur support!!!! 

not really a question!! i just wanted to say your posts on this blog always brighten my day and you're really an incredible artist and person, keep rockin on my dude!! *clutching my heart* the fuck this is so sweet

1 .I just wanted to say your blog is really awesome! It's very lovely. I also like how you made michael trans and like handled it? (just with how all the characters treat him and stuff its v nice). Your art is super duper! Thanks for running this awesome blog! 2. Hey! This isn't a question but I wanted to say that I appreciate michael being trans!! As a trans boy it's just rly awesome to see something like that casually thrown into an ask blog without making it a huge weird deal :D immm,,, i kinda really love the idea of michael being trans cause a lot of my trans male friends are actually pretty confident in their skin and michael is a very confident character? and u rarely see that with trans representation and its so refreshing to see it portrayed well. im trying to do that here but again if! i do anything wrong let me know!

how did you first get into art? (also i really love your blog, it's amazing!) ive been drawing as long as i remember! ive got mad adhd and wasnt diagnosed until late in ym life so i would just draw nonstop in my classes ahaha i used to read the sunday comics a lot and they really inspired me to try and make comics of my own too!! (and omg thank u) 

someone also asked me if i went to church or was religious but tumblr ate the ask but i used to go to church a lot as a kid but im currently not religious at all aaa

ok holy shit that was a lot but thanks again to everyone i legit cry a lot about how supportive u all are thank u so much aaaa

[thebitchmint]

Backstage Prepping

Dyna and Distortia signed autographs and smiled for snowy pictures with fans lined up outside before smackdown. The duo had snagged a taxi out front of the hotel, both women liked to gear up early and they strolled inside the stadium after a frozen 15 minutes. Kylie stopped when she heard a familiar deep laugh from down the hallway where the men’s locker room was, turning to Heather only to find out she had lost her. Retracing her steps back through the backstage area, Kylie found her friend at the catering table. Kylie laughed out loud as she  watched her drop all of her bags, pulled off her beanie and gloves and scarf and was picking over fruit and vegetables, she popped two celery sticks into mouth and lined her plate with more. Nothing came between these girls and their food, well except maybe one thing… 

“Ladies, you need to get to makeup, Neville and Distortia will open smackdown with an attack on Daivari and Kendrick. Kyle the stage manager and his headset that never stopped buzzing was finishing up his own plate. “OH snap!” both women grabbed up their stuff and hurried to the locker room. Distortia sat in the wwe makeup chair and waited, her full leather bodysuit wasn’t as full coverage as it used to be. A plunging neckline, mesh cutouts on her hips and thighs made the pants look more like tasteful ragged worn tights. Her boots were the only color, deep purple and they came up almost mid thigh. It was edgy, Kylie always felt like Distortia was a sexy, acrobat of some sort in her new leotard. She kinda missed her mask though, ever since her debut Distortia had worn a “mankind” lady mask that made her look even more twisted. However earlier this year at Wrestlemania Distortia would again battle one of her biggest foes, Dyna, in a Career vs Mask match. If Distortia won, Dyna was to leave the WWE forever, and if Dyna won then Distortia had to get rid of the mask. Dyna may have won the match with a clean pin but Distortia destroyed her manager Bailey, or Erin, in a rage after she had to remove her mask. It gave Erin time off to have surgery and gave the two real life best friends new avenues to pursue. Dyna would be traded to smackdown in the draft and Distortia would be inconsolable in the loss of her identity, until King Neville recruited her of course. 

Just as she closed her eyes to daydream, her makeup artist Malia from the glam squad popped up out of nowhere and spinned her chair causing Kylie to jump. “OH MAN IM SORRY I THOUGHT YOU HEARD ME COMING UP.” Both girls dropped into a fit of laughter. “OH wow I am sorry, I was daydreaming and completely missed you.” “OH no worries Kyle, what do you want to do tonight? purple or green?” “Hmm surprise me. Just make me look wicked.” Kylie said.  “You got it. So who were you day dreaming about?” Malia was very sweet but a gossip queen, “Oh you know, just my sweet chihuahua fur baby Max at home. I really miss my dog.” “OH haha how sweet.” As Malia went to work, Kylie watched a group from the male roster come around the corner into the foyer area, Neville stepped out from behind Tye Dillinger, the cruiserweights had invaded smackdown as Raw was long enough already. 205 live took place right after smackdown so it made sense. They all had plates of food, and drinks and sat down at one of the tables in the foyer area to eat. Kylie hadn’t been spotted, so she just watched. Watched as neville laughed, and cut up with his friends. Watched as the muscles rippled and wrinkled his shirt, and remember the full weight him on top of her and inside her. She watched his push the tomatoes out of salad, he hates tomatoes  and sour cream. She daydreamed about when he sucked on her lip rings as he was fucking her, she remembered his hands were strong but gentle. When Malia broke through her trance, “Oh I see now, a queen is smitten with her king.” Kylie just giggled at her lame joke. “He is very intense, I don’t know how ya’ll do it sometimes. He seems intense outside the ring too, I mean is he always so brash when he is travelling?” Malia rambled as she blended Kylie’s face. “Uh no actually he is very quiet outside wrestling.” Kylie peeped through one eye at Neville, “He’s funny too, just gotta catch him in a good mood.” Malia laughed, “So what look are you wanting tonight?” “Wicked and dark as usual. Maybe some glitter, and nude lips. I want the focus on my eyes for the promo.” Kylie was giving a pretty cool speech tonight and she wanted to leave an impression.

“Sami, really?” Heather was giggling so hard as she watched him shovel pizza in his mouth. “How about a pizza kiss?” he puckered up at her several time before wiping his mouth. Heather pretended to be grossed out and push him away, she was perched on top of an equipment box with Sami settled between her knees. Dressed in her ring gear and a hoodie, she sat with a makeup less face and as she pulled her hair into a clip something caught Sami’s eye “OH my goodness Heather I left a mark on your neck.” He faked shock and then smiled devilishly. “Yes I know, I saw, I am waiting for Courtney on the glam squad to help me so word doesn’t get out about Heather has a hickey and won’t come clean about who, or how or why.” She rolled her eyes and watched him eat. She went back to telling him a fan story when Nia came out of the locker room causing them to separate. Giving them a quizzical look but not pressing the issue she greeted both and continued on her way. “Nia where you going?” Sami shouted at her, “Makeup homie.” “OH shit not before me your aren’t” Heather sprang off the box and ran down the hall blowing a kiss to sami as she zoomed by, elbow wrestling Nia around the corner and sliding into the makeup chair just as Natalya was getting out. ”DAMN GINA” Courtney the makeup artist looked startled as the tornado of bodies and hair came at her, all the women broke out into laughter. Sami walked over to the table near the makeup foyer, Neville was just finishing up his dinner, “Aye how did your room arrangement work out?” Neville smiled at his friend. “Oh you know,” Sami shrugged and smiled sheepishly. “It worked out, what about you, how’s the suite life?” “Aye.” Neville stood up and stretched. “Well mate, time to get ready to work.” Distortia caught his attention out of the corner of his eye as she hopped up from the makeup chair. Neville stopped; Her bodysuit didn’t show as much skin as the other divas but it left little to the imagination. Neville practically wiped drool from his lips as Kylie bend over the vanity mirror to inspected her eye makeup. She would be wickedly styled and stealing the show as she always did, Neville had to hold himself. He knew Distortia would be giving a long promo tonight and it was already a hassle keeping his composure around her. Sami was watching Heather get primped and styled for Smackdown, her blonde hair was long and soft, she always smelled so good and he couldn’t help but drift back to their shower together. Neville could see the far off look in his friend’s eyes, but nudged him a little when the new day came barrelling around the corner in a ball of chatter and laughter. “Aye, cmon brother, let’s get ready to wrestle.” Neville shot the girls a long stare and then walked back to the locker room.

Kylie watched Courtney start Heather’s makeup, her nerves were starting to build as the time for the show to start dwindled down. “Listen you can’t act like a total diva at the hotel again, it’s so embarrassing. Those people are just doing their jobs to provide for their families and that poor girl looked terrified of you.” Heather looked up at her friend, “Oh yeah I know, I was acting. I tipped her well trust me.” she waved her off. “Acting like a raging brat.I can’t imagine Sami thought that was cute.” Kylie muttered. “Heather sat forward interrupting her makeup. “No Honey I was ACTING as the distraction.” Heather’s voice was low so Malia behind her didn’t even notice, Courtney just ignored the exchange as she usually did. “OoooH ok … I was going to say, I can’t believe you’re pulling some bullshit about having your gear cleaned when you and I had both of ours cleaned in St. Louis anyways.” Kylie giggled, she should have known Heather was up to something. “Wait what for?” Kylie was still lost. “I thought yall needed a room.” “KYLIE I didn’t want to go UP to your room, when I HAD MY OWN ROOM.” Heather watched the truth fill Kylie’s eyes, and both girls busted into laughter again. Courtney pulled back Heather’s hair to finish up and all women saw the mark at the same time. “OH…” Kylie clapped her hand over her mouth but she couldn’t stop the initial carry in her voice. Thankfully Courtney had enough snap to step in close and in front of Nia Jax and Malia’s view of the hickey. “Ohhhhhhhh my God I love my eye makeup Malia thanks.” Kylie tried to save the moment, primped her hair in the mirror and winked at the glam squad. Courtney made quick work of Sami’s signature and finished up Heather’s hair without a second look, Heather loved that about her. “Alright superstars, all done.” “Thank Court, you are the best.” Heather hugged her, one glance in the mirror reminded her that her new ring gear was badass yet comfortable. For years it was skimpy, glittery bright color tops and shorts that were so damn itchy and horrible but not anymore. Dyna had traded her shorts for black matte leather pants, a cropped black or white tank top with crazy texas inspired kick pads on her shins and a long crystal encrusted duster jacket. She felt more like a female undertaker then her normal, country bumpkin self but that’s where they were going with it, Heather flipped her hair one more time as she walked to the locker room, watching her best friend walking in front of her even Heather was feeling pretty emotional. She had the best job in the world, in front of amazing fans, with two of her best friends and now hopefully she had met a man she could share that with. 

The entire arena vibrated with sound and emotion. Distortia stood at the on ramp waiting for the music to hit, feeling the hum of her entire universe as Smackdown Live was about to start. Neville came up and give her a slight squeeze around her waist, Daivari would be back there soon enough as Neville was to attack him. Kylie quickly kissed Neville as her music hit, she waited for her cue and then busted through the black curtain, into a flood of stage lights and smoke as the crowd screams sent vibrations through her body.

TO BE CONTINUED

[wizardcum300]

@air-a-shii tagged me in this forever ago and i did not do it till now cuz like ya kno im stuppit its ya boy lil dum dum

five things you’ll find in my bag:

what bag

wha

five things you’ll find in my bedroom:

a bed haha

5 boxes

me

a screwdriver

a fairy wand i stole from a 8 year old 

things i’ve always wanted to do:

go night driving with my good good friends whom i love

get a sugar daddy

learn to play the violin

ive always wanted to see my mother smile and laugh like she doesnt have anything to worry about like she used to. hm.

five things that make me feel happy:

talking to ppl i love alot

hearing my friends genuinely laugh at something they think is funny, but a good laugh ya kno? a good hardy laugh man that shit hits deeep

hearing my friends talk about something theyre passionate about dude its so ahhh

okay not to sound like a pothead but that feeling u get when ur at ur pique high and u feel like theres nothing wrong ur life and ur at peace

seeing.. beauuuttiffull smiles like im talkin.. all toothyyy and their eyes get all squintyy and.. uh they just look so happy its so gooooddd ahhh

five things i’m currently into:

hxh bro, hxh for life 

sitting on my ass all day and not doing anything productive with my life but hey whats new lmao thats relatable right yall love relatable content yall eat that shit up 

beatin this dick till i die

80s n 90s r&b

chillin 

five things on my to-do list:

eat some crepes

go to f21 and get a sexy ass dress cuz im goin to a clubbbb next weekend u better believe ima post pics cuz ima look fly as hell and yall gonna see meeee

chill

visit one of my best friends who lives kinda far um hopefully soon lol

live at least until i reach 48 

@bignaruto @treehouses do it u boob boo the fools

[survivor-islands-of-adventure]

EPISODE 9

As frustrating as the blind vote was, Timmy went home, thankfully. There wasn’t a lot of drama or anything, but I still want to touch base with everyone regardless.

Mark made a group chat comprised of all of the original Villains kinda out of nowhere. Named it "OG Villys", which is dangerously close to copyright infringement with the thing I have with Chris and Drew. They're targeting Tracey, which I'm not crazy about. She's really proven herself these last couple of days to me, and I'd rather see a villain go than a civilian.

I knew that "OG Villys" chat was sus. According to Drew, Ricky went rouge and told him that the plan isn't to vote out a Hero, it's to vote out a Civilian. Tracey is just an easy target, and after her, it'll be a domino effect. Not gonna lie, I feel a little betrayed, but at least I've got an excuse to work with the Heroes.

We love tea and our allies winning the special powers! Pat just told me he won the blind reward comp! So exciting. I do consider Pat a very close ally in this game. He has a Sapphire Idol and this is definitely something we can utilize down the road. I knew it would be some cracked ass idol knowing Monty specifically haha. I was worried someone like Sammy or Mark would have it but knowing where it is, is certainly helpful. I feel like I’m in a decent spot in this game, it’s just going to be tricky not being caught on both sides. I have my OG heroes on one side, and my civilian boys on the other side. Realistically Mark or Tracey going doesn’t really negatively impact my game in any shape or form. I think Mark going is big because it’s the first real big move of the game. It could open things up between Sammy and I and other OG villains that didn’t get swapped. It’s also a positive for Tracey to go because I literally have no allegiance to her. She hasn’t told me the truth about my name being thrown around (even tho it was fake) and she honestly just isn’t online as much as she should be to chat. I really don’t know which way I’m voting tonight, but it will likely be what’s best for my game personally without making any waves??? What that is??? Who knows.

Why does Ricky hate me so much like he comes for me in every game we play together, I just don't know what I did to him to make him hate me so much. 

A.T. told me that Mark should go home because we should vote a villain out, but i dont 100% agree with it. Now apparently votes are going for Madison which I 200% don't agree with because apparently Ricky wants her out. Idk who to vote for at this point but it sure as hell isn't for Madison. I might need to vote Mark but I'll still be upset if he leaves. Who else is gonna call me Mami?

So apparently AT is a rat? And so is stoner? And mark could be going home? Like what the hell is happening. I really need Madison or AT to go home and it ain’t fair I don’t get my way all the time ugh! I am perfect! 

Positives I won immunity I'm at least tying my worst placement, hopefully beating it I had a really good hiding spot Negatives: An ally is leaving tonight I have no traction in this game Getting out of double digits is gonna be nearly impossible I spent an entire day of my life defending a fucking hiding spot I'm sad like all the time Why am i here

This week has been fucking crazy. Dan is the only one that know that I TOLD MARK THATVHE WAS BEING TARGETED. And my final goal was to save Madison and mark and I think that me and dan and Chelsea actually pulled it off. I am SO BERVOUS for this vote. This has been one of the most hectic survivor days I have ever had ever. 

Whewwwwww so I survived blind week and timbo is goooooone! He was mad on his way out talking about big moves and stuff gfhgjgjbjh so immunity happened and drew got it which leaves me in a panic bc I feel like vulnerable and obvs my name was brought up but now everything is getting messy and I might be fine after all????? So initially I wanted to go for one of the heroes but then AT came to me and was like we should vote mark instead and I'm like wow he's really goin after his own ppl,?!?! So like Chelsea got wind of this plan and told mark about it which makes me wonder if they are close or if Chelsea wants the villains to self destruct ???? Either way it could keep me safe so idc!!!!!! So like Madison's name has also been brought up but I think with the two boys targeting each other she may be safe too, which sucks bc fuck the heroes but oh well. Anyway in conclusion this tribal is gonna be messy and idk what will happen cyrhdjfgg like my biggest fear rn is that the heroes are tricking both sides of the villains in order for us to split and then they have majority and vote for like me or smth idk if that's even viable at this point but I'm worrying anyway dhdjdjndjd I think my best bet may be with voting for mark but we'll see how it goes 

This week has been fucking crazy. Dan is the only one that know that I TOLD MARK THATVHE WAS BEING TARGETED. And my final goal was to save Madison and mark and I think that me and dan and Chelsea actually pulled it off. I am SO BERVOUS for this vote. This has been one of the most hectic survivor days I have ever had ever. 

okay so i has the hiding spot first bc i saw the rule where if you had it for an hour then like u win. So i was like okay y’all like I’m about to pop off and win this thing. Then the rule got changed  and I was like oop and pmed drew telling him to take it and he could have it LMAO. I didn’t tell anyone that tho bc I don’t want people to think I’m working w him. I wanna trust drew so badly but i know how smart he is and how he can snap crackle and pop my neck in a sec. so i ended up sleeping really good bc i didn’t care about the challenge bc i don’t think I’m in any real danger. In order to win this game tho i need to make some power moves. I really want to separate myself from mark even tho we have f2 but like i wanna be f2 with Dan or like Tracey or something. Or Charlotte/pippa. I just know that mark has a target on his back and i could potentially get one on mine by association. I have barely talked to any of the heroes so i gotta up my social game. Also AT has annoyed me a lot and I have my little alliance the suggestion of voting him out and they legit just turned it down. UMM NO YALL, I’ve been through this before and I’m not going through another alliance where what i day doesn’t matter. By the end of the night I’ll get what i want. That put up a red flag for me bc it shows that the alliance isn’t really like showing thought about my plan and that madison should go home tonight. I low key didn’t care much for madison and the start bc like we don’t talk but i want to work with her and like pat more. Umm i think that’s all that has happened but I’ve heard several names(Madison/Mark/Dan/AT/Tracey) as long as it ain’t me I’m good HOLLA.

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol andrew? ANDREW? fucking andrew tried to get me out. my goodness what a terrific joke that was. The second he brought my name up every hero came to me and told me. the best part is im not close with any of them other than pat lol. then he tried to be cute on call and i shut that down too. imagine how embarrasing that mustve been. so confident on call for absolutely nothing. the only thing that might come back at me on that vote was when i told madison that stoner targetted her last round LOL he def didnt do that but im a fucking villain for a reason so yolo. anyways the foursome of me sammy charlotte and ricky is like well known now but im p sure pat and chelsea want me to stick around and work with me. eventually well have to cut ricky so that way me and sammy dont look so suspicious. im gonna try and fade into the background for a couple rounds but that wont happen. if it were up to me the next three votes would be dan drew and then stoner. dan and drew are just such challenge beasts and it breaks up the alliance of chelsea pat dan and madison and stoner is just a flake and does whatever he wants which is scary.  ok im bored of typing bye

[celestialallstars]

Episode #6: “Can i PLEASE get a blindside.” - Jared

ok so basically the game has been sooo quiet and ive like.  felt dead. idk. i had a breakdown last night bc of it and i cried on my couch (KNOW THERE WAS A LOT MORE THAN THIS LKSDJGKLDSGLS I WOULDNT CRY PURELY BC OF THAT) but yaaa and now im better but like the entire day i was throwing up in class (or like feeling anxious im exaggerating sorry) about going home.

i didnt want mo out but with that being said i didnt want anyone out?? after i mentioned to him that stephen/mo were targeting each other, rhys came to me with the idea that like him jared chloe and i should make a chat, and i was down for that bc it would secure my positioning and like ALSGKSDG who'd flip on an alliance THIS early.. right?? right..

chloe was really not talkative with me. stephen/jared were active so i appreciate that immensely. im just thrown off. i dont really know who i can or cant trust.

OK ALSO SIDE NOTE CHRIS SENT ME [IM NOT EXAGGERATING] 55+ MSGS SPILLING TEA ABOUT HOW THE TUATHA HAD AN OG ALLIANCE WITH EVERYONE BUT MITCH + MAYNOR - which i knew about but LASKGLDKS AHHHH. and he leaked that stephen wanted kori/bryce targeted and i leaked that to bryce to further stephens target. IM JUST SO MESSY LOL

also i kind of predicted a swap likeee omfg. and i dont know how i feel. i kind of felt safe on my tribe??? but like.. oh no. anyway, my tribe isnt super dominant in challenges or anything (compared 2 the other tribe who has bryce/stephen/drew), but i think we can win a lipsync since we have a woman, gay men, and a metrosexual male who has an outgoing personality (and i mean that in the nicest way obviously). IDK I HOPE WE WIN BC THAT TRIBAL WAS HORRIFIC AND I LOVE MO SO MUCH AND AHH.

ill probs give a video soon in more depth with what chris said. yalls deserve it.. oops period.

I HOPE YALL CAN FORGIVE ME. im eating hotdog. bye bye love u all.

Wow I like the whole tribe! Alyssa is probably my front runner of talking and honestly she's great! I am in her spell ahhhh but hey JARED is here too woo! I think at least with Mitch and Zach too I'll be safe but I'll see! This challenge could either go really well or really badly for us but I'm excited to do anything creativity!!

I absolutly love my tribe at the moment, i'm getting along well with alot of them except Kori who i haven't spoken to much at all but im confident in our abilities to win! Jared is talking a little bit about wanting the game to pick up a little bit and i agree to some extent however blindsiding someone just for the sake of a blindside isn't smart gameplay so im just gonna lay low nd continue making those strong bonds here there and everywhere to hopfully come out on top should we end up at tribal

Can i PLEASE get a blindside

________________________________________________________________

hi it's 6 am but rhys fucking filmed vertically so if we lose he automatically has my vote

I feel good but also scared. I dont think I'll do as good of a job as I hope, but it also is turning out decently so far. My biggest concern is time. With having work tomorrow, I can only do the editing on my lunch break of 90 minutes, then whenever i get home which probably wont be until 6, given the upload time that leaves me with about 3 hours in total. Hopefully I'll be able to work with Rhys and Jack's stuff, as i think it'll be easier for me to do it then. Regardless, I'm gonna be a zombie but LOL this is the second Wednesday in a row I stayed up late except this is not for school and instead of 3 hours, ima get 2 hours of sleep haha that is so sad and funny and heebee jeebee zoinks, alright goodnight

Two things: 1) there's really nothing quite like making a fool of yourself multiple times in a single org, just to be immune for one round. 2) i am horrible at looking for idols

So Matt just told me he thinks we’re gonna have a double tribal right before merge which is like ew I hate that throw it out please, speaking of throwing out uh Kori can go because he’s wearing on my nerves like yes we’re gonna get things done on time calm down please and thanks.

these people are actually delulu if they think that video is winning. no fucking way we are winning. time to go to tribal!

So the swap has happened, and I get what is almost probably my worst case scenario player-wise. All of my close allies, with the exception of Kori, are currently on Cyrena. Meaning that winning immunity isn't even really good, since it puts them in danger.

I think there's a way to make this bad situation good though. Getting to finally work with Michael, Matt, Loris, and Drew can actually be a blessing in disguise. If I get on their good sides now, they might clue me into their plans once merge rolls around. That's the hope, anyway. For now my goal is just to survive being swapped with a bunch of people I've barely spoke to!

The past 24 hours have been major toughie for me. Staying up late and then trying to manage editing a video, work, and time constraints, and I won't lie, its been exhausting, but I didn't want to let my tribe down, or anyone down I guess. A little ways through, I kinda felt pretty defeated and then learning at last minute it was due an hour before I predicted made me panic A LOT internally, but it does seem like the tribe likes it so if we do lose and if they do vote me out, I can look back at this and feel like I did something right.

Well a lots happened and to be honest at times life and this game move too quick for me to even remember if I've mentioned it. We swapped, and I'm trying to just keep myself afloat however I can.

The challenge was overly stressful and I have no idea if we'll pull it out. Editing has been so stressful and I've found new appreciation for the people that do it. I just hope whatever I whip together will just be enough so that I can breathe and really take stalk of my new situation.

So, I haven't been around a whole bunch recently. However I'm glad we didn't go to tribal, that could've been  a reason if my name came up. So I'm glad I have time to more cement my bonds on this tribe and keep my name out of peoples mouths.

We JUST WON IMMUNITY WOOHOO. I was kind of nervous with a music challenge considering the only other one I did previously I did not do the greatest in :P. Both videos were amazing and im so glad Eve and Jones's mom liked ours significantly greater than the other one! As far as my position is concerned, I am reunited with Jared and our relationship is still strong I think so that's good. Stephen I am HOPING will be ok by just latching on to Kori at least for premerge. Those two are still the ones I trust the most, but I also like Alyssa Chris and Zach. I WISH i could connect more with jack, but i feel like every time we play together it gets more difficult to hold a conversation, so that's a yikes. Jared myself and stephen are diligently working on the idol search, but it's likely already found. I'm pretty sure there are too many components for someone to just find it by themselves

WELL. Im a target tonight! God we really do love that for me. We really do. Kori, eat my fucking ass. You leave me on read all the time. And then you have the NERVE. THE ACTUAL NERVE. to be like "omg stop slipping in my dm's!" Boo if you didn't leave me on read constantly then maybe i would actually want to speak to you! an actual moron. And then STEPHEN HAS THE FUCKING AUDACITY to me like "ya lol i'll be at tribal i'll make the decision between you and Kori at tribal!". BOI. THAT IS NOT HOW YOU GET TRUST IN SOMEONE. Its fucking ridiculous. Thank god Michael is in my corner, hopefully drew and bryce too. I am NOT getting 15th right now, no way. I am BETTER than this. i am going to make it work, tim gunn style. maybe its time to break the fajitas and channel their energy once again

Why do I go on the initiative literally ever? I'm clearly bad at it, I wasn't even remotely thinking things through and I SHOULD have let Stephen or someone else suggest someone but no I had to be mildly greedy and wanna send home Matt whom I barely DM.

I already flopped editing the video, and now here I am flopping the social/stategy game that I love playing supposedly.

Of course I tried reaching out to Michael and Drew FOOLISHLY because I wanted to build trust and maybe work with them. So naturally Michael tells Matt because ofc they'd be close as would Drew probably since he and Michael have been together since Day 1. As it stands I'm stuck praying Loris is gonna vote with me and it just sucks because I'm so bad at this game.

I'm trying to keep a cool head right now because there's still time. Stephen and I are trying to work logistics, see if we need to switch the vote to say Michael in case of an idol, but I'm not sure Loris/Bryce would be on board for that.

There's a pretty good chance that I'm definitely dead. But I'ma fight to the bitter end!

Today I learned from Stephen that Kori is in some dangerous water. He I guess said Matt's name to Michael who told Matt and now them and Drew are voting Kori. However Bryce and Stephen and perhaps Loris are all voting Matt. Now this is good if it works because honestly that group having to endure their numbers dwindling is good for my game. It only leaves Jack and Alyssa but I think we better be careful because I can see both of them slipping through the inevitable war zone that is gonna be happening.

Today's been a pretty informative day for me. After losing the immunity challenge by a hair, I was worried because I didn't think I had bonded very well with my current tribe through One World, luckily for me, that doesn't seem to be their biggest concern at the moment.

During the initial stages of the vote, I talked to Kori and the two of us decided Matt would be the easiest target to take out. I was leaning towards voting Matt because we hadn't talked very much, so hearing Kori was on board right away simplified things for sure. Bryce and Loris both seem to be on board with it too so I shouldn't have anything to worry about at this point.

In the morning, things got a whole lot more complicated. Matt found out he was the target through Michael, and began his campaign to get Kori out instead of himself. I'm not entirely sure why Michael decided to do this, but it doesn't make much of a difference at this point. Matt campaigned to me, and I sorta pretended to be on the fence. I was listening to what he said, but Kori is realistically one of my closest allies, there's no way I'm voting him out to side with people I had just met.

Once campaign season got under way, I had a conversation with Chris. Chris tells me that on original Orfeo, him, Loris, and Zach believed there was an alliance of Chloe/Sharky/Drew/Michael formed. This explains not only why Sharky was seen as an easy boot on swap-Tuatha, but also why Michael wants to keep Matt instead of Kori. With Chloe re-joining after tribal, him/Drew/Chloe/Matt would form a tight majority. Without Matt, they're a minority.

I proposed an idea to switch the vote from Matt to Michael or Drew. I said it was because I was worried about an idol, but this alliance is the real reason I wanted to do it. However, Kori, Loris, and Bryce are comfortable with the status quo and since it's not my neck on the line I didn't feel the need to push too hard.

Me, Kori, and Bryce now also have an alliance with Loris, which is cool? I haven't gotten very close with Loris yet but he seems like a smart player tied to Chris and Zach which spells good things for us working together in the future. Assuming I survive this vote and have a future, of course.

hi I think I might make it past final 15 that’s nice umm... I suggested an alliance of me Bryce Stephen Kori to counter the potential power of chloe Matt Michael and drew once chloe joins our tribe because my brain is massive. but now we’re like scared for idols . scary shih anyways like how r u I’m good.

________________________________________________________________

oh huh tribes r gonna be even again next round... so I have to make this conf by default just in case of a you know what wait no anna u said no more 24 hour challenges QUEEN ... thank god I can’t be bothered to delete this so she’s being SENT

Right now there's so many things running through my head with the introduction of Matts vote steal, because realistically i could convince him to give to me or i could keep him around as a potential shield. I don't want to do it to the guy but also a vote steal could shift the tides of the game in my favour later down the line. so it's a difficult decision and one id rather have more time to contemplate.

Wooo ok operation vote steal is a go and next round we’ll be swimming in green hopefully but with one world sis og tribe lines just ain’t it!

God im over this tribal. Like ugh these people really are under Kori's mist so like im probably going home. Do I think i might be able to survive? a small glimmer of hope says yes, but i'm not confident. God im just... so annoyed at this. Im clearly on the outs here and I just HOPE i can pull through i just am so scared. I know if i do leave though that I have fought my damn hardest to stay tonight. Im trying to think of the positives because its hard to do so because im being sad atm.. UGH. the fajitas really have failed me tonight, their light has dimmed and their guidance is no more. i am now with the darkness. we r one.

Oh my fucking god my heart is breaking. Matt is basically in such a deep hole he's going to go home, unless he plays an idol. And Alyssa has an idol. And she doesn't think it's smart to use it on him because Michael says he's just gonna go home next round. His social game hasn't been up to snuff and they're gonna boot him regardless, so she wants to keep us with power and let him go. And I agree with her. Which kills me. I'm usually able to just be a robot when it comes to this like yes I will make the smarter decision if it means I'll be emotionally torn, and this is such an instance. Luckily, it's not my idol to give up. Yes Alyssa says it's "our" idol but it's her call end of the day. I just... fuck. This is all stars man. And I'm actually starting to feel, for once.

Well it's about an hour before tribal and at least on it's surface it would seem Matt is going. I'm not confident though because any number of things COULD happen. I'm hoping there's no idol play, just because I feel like pre-merge just isn't a good look for me.

If Matt does pull something off, then kudos to him, and if it's me that'd make this my final confessional for the season. I've had such an amazing time playing and while I feel like I've been playing a lower key game on purpose I feel like I'm doing what I can to really come into my own. I hope the bonds I've made are gonna stick and that everything works out for us.

But if it doesn't I guess I'll have to find a way to be ok with that. This has been such a unique All-Stars experience so far, and I hope I can take what I've gotten from it and make myself better for it. (Also highkey hopefully this isn't my last confessional and I'm getting sentimental for no reason.)

________________________________________________________________

Kori is voted out 4-3.

[heehaw-heehay]

distance - christina perri

“And I will make sure to keep my distance, Say I love you when you're not listening, How long, can we keep this up, up, up?”

this song really puts me in my feels man took the words right outta my mouth so RELEVANT!! ho man yall im turning to tumblr more and more to express my feelings and it feels nice :~) 

my words not fancy poetic kind but HEY as long as im happy and satisfied am i right jejejejeje

so wow uni starts in 2 weeks and beyond excited mixed in with a lil anxious and fear. im gonna list the major changes and my emotions LET MYSELF GO!!! 

1) moving into hall 12 

gee yall im not even going to an overseas university and im feeling a lil emotional and theres just smth exciting yet unsettling about this ya feel? im gonna be going home to an empty room after a day of hustlin and i wonder if i can get used to it. who knows? i will enjoy it maybe. but im a big scaredy cat and paranoid lil bij so we will have to see how it goes :~) BUT OVERALL im feeling quite positive im gna miss my mom dad and mayb if im feeling nice my sis too hahahaha jk i love my sis to bits

2) double major 

its pretty daunting but idk man i believe that if its two of the things that im actually interested in, it wont feel so tough (right?) but of course im gonna take on this challenge positively and push away all the “nah man dont think i can do this” or “i can always drop my second major right” GOTTA RMB WHY YOU CONSIDERED TAKING IT OK! ok bismillah. srsly tho youve had your heart set on this double major ever since j1/j2? (doesnt seem like a long time but wow once i saw that i didnt think i considered any other path lol) and you changed your ultimate choice of nus to ntu so that says smth right? 

3) making new friends? 

i dont always worry about this aspectv(thanks to cedar mayb) but im now aware that uni is so much more different..... mostly the age and maturity level la like therell be more wild ppl around you but ofc there will also be those halal ones from the malay community so all in all im pretty stoked about this. ok but im still quite worried because im not going to any hall/faculty orientations so idk, again, ill have to see how it goes... hopefully my extroverted ass can help me out here

4) independence and freedom 

i just really hope i dont take granted of the freedom and go real crazy haha AND I have to be so much more independent it kinda scares me like planning my timetable (omg i hate this so much just cos it leaves room for more bad choices) someone pls take my hand and guide me in uni life lelelelel im not quite ready yet 

im hoping for little distractions (no time for love or drama alright) unless im not part of the drama then HEY SPILL THE TEA!!!!! and about the love part hahahaha granted i am bound to feel lonely esp if ppl around me are dating or are in rs but no rush gurl :~) dont gotta force it and rmb all kinds of love, not just the romantic kind, is important!! alright im feeling good after writing all this out sweeeeeeet mayb i found my outlet? 

[survivoremathia]

Ep. 3 "Like Hun....Drink Some Chamomile and Take a Chill Pill" - RTP

COLIN

RED ALERT. 

RED ALERT. [3/2/17, 8:38:33 PM] Trevor: So ummm... I'm gonna go WHAT THE HECK. DOES HE GOTTA DO THIS 22 MINUTES BEFORE THE DEADLINE. LIKE WE CAN'T EVEN REALLY TALK ABOUT IT NOW AS AN ALLIANCE. WHAT IS HE DOING. WHY IS HE DOING THIS. WHAT THE HECK. OH MY GOD I NEED TO FIGURE OUT IF I'M GONNA GO NOW. OKAY REAL TALK IM NOT AND WILL NEVER BECAUSE IM ACTUALLY LOYAL BUT STILL. WHAT THE HECK

DUNCAN

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovnWp1YTRcA&feature=youtu.be To sum it up in three main points: 1. Im happy to be playing with Owen again 2. Im also just ecstatic in general to play in Ahena again, regardless of the outcome 3. On 3/2/17, at 6:25 PM, Unkie Dunkie wrote: > Fuck me up fam I’m ready to play

JD

Oh my god! What the hell's going on over there that would make them want to come here?? Three people came here, one kinda by accident sure but like... Really? We are a sweet ass tribe but like... Really? It's like someone from London moving to come ' little town ' with only 7000 people there. Something doesn't fit. I don't like it. 

RTP

Ok so we won the challenge which was awesome. I was the only one on my tribe not going to the labyrinth so fuck me eh. i feel pretty good with my ol boys alliance of matt david me and owen. hopefully we can stick it out for a while

then two people quit from odysseus and im like yasssss more ppl gone....and then there is a mutiny. i wanted to mutiny so bad just for the drama, but no one else from my tribe wanted to do it and im not gonna be the dumbass that mutinies by myself...nuh uh..... and then three people from olympus ended up on odysseus...haha omg wtf...im shocked trevor went to lydia and not to me and owen...hmm....im sus of that so now we have this reward challenge...and i make a totally normal comment like...oh hey maybe the people competing should have good survivor knowledge since the challenge is ya know...guessing survivor contestants...and duncan is like YOU DONT NEED TO KNOW SURVIVOR TO WIN THIS....like hun....drink some chamomile and take a chill pill....no technically you dont...but it sure as hell makes it easier....i guess duncan is my first target on this tribe if we lose again....whatever...bye

ROB

Yikes I doubt I made one last round. I'm basically going to rely on my Bangladesh people. I love Logan and Eddie, so they're the perfect people to work with. I like Colin too, I just need to talk to him more. Two people quit and there was a mutiny offer afterwards. Three people from my tribe mutinied when we were literally dominating challenges, sort of. We hadn't lost yet. Trevor, Sam, and Isaac were people I was wary of, so I know that I can't trust them at all since they're obviously not wanting to work with me. I know I'm not talking much, but still. Reward is basically going to rely on me since Logan and Colin aren't well-versed in Survivor and Eddie is MIA. Rip me. If we lose immunity, I feel like Colin will be the person leaving. He's literally the odd man out. Don't know if he knows it. Hopefully, at least, and in my mind. Sorry Colin. I'm screwed.

COLIN

I think I've written more confessionals for the first three rounds of this game than I did for all of PI: Malibu. Oops. But anyway.... that mutiny WHEW. Fuck those guys huh. We went from the ONLY tribe with all 7 members to......... 4 members. I knew Trevor was leaving and I lowkey had a feeling Sam and Isaac MIGHT but still for them all three to leave is such a kick in the face. That alliance between me, Logan, and Trevor lasted not even 24 hours. Not even ONE DAY yall. Hopefully we can slay these next two immunities so we don't have to go to tribal, because that would honestly suck. At least Logan and I have half the vote so that makes me feel a little bit safer, but still without majority and with the possibility of a rock draw/fire making challenge (idk how it would work if it ties) this could be devastating to my game. Anyway, thanks Trevor, you fucked over the person who trusted you the most.

ROB

Hosts are furious.

Immunity went well, bless. At least I hope so.

COLIN THIS IS MY OFFICIAL APPLICATION TO JOIN THE LOGAN FAN CLUB.

Y'all don't even know how much I love Logan. Like I am so glad I got put on a tribe with them and actually got kinda close with them. They're such a sweetheart and so easy to talk to. They are WINNING this season KNOW that. Literally my entire tribe is so cute and sweet now?? Now that the uglies and traitors have left we're all cute and adorable. God I really just hope we don't have to go to tribal at all before the swap. If I have to vote anyone on this tribe I'll cry.

ROB I think I've become the leader of the tribe. I don't want to be, but Eddie is barely here and I don't think Logan and Colin would step up to do challenges and stuff. I like everyone in the tribe and I don't want to lose these immunity challenges. The mutineers will be the first to die. Lying sucks, I'm not positive if I said yet if Sam told me he was NOT going to mutiny.

RTP

Ok so heres a pre-immunity results confessional. so my Ye Ol' Boys Club alliance is going pretty well. it doesnt seem like we are gonna be best friends but we all know its good for numbers and after that first tribal we trust each other. so that seems good for now. and knowing that we are swapping in two rounds is keeping us all from doing anything shady so that when we swap we dont have to worry about each other turning on us. that being said.... in our foursome i feel like i naturally get along with owen the best...hes the easiest for me to talk to...granted i feel pretty comfortable with all three of them....but matt just gave me some tea about the labyrinth and told me that he wasnt telling owen or david. now i have known matt for a long time and i was there for his matt fucking summers days....but i know matt has grown and thats not how he plays anymore but that reputation will never go away...there is a trick to keeping matt on your side....treat him with respect and trust what he says....if youve been friendly and honest with him he will do the same to you...and the second you question or belittle him youre as good as shit because he is already plotting your demise...hmm...treat someone with respect what a concept huh. not only that, but this makes me feel like i have a good #1 ally with matt and a good #1 ally with david. as much as i love owen i know damn well hell turn on me before trevor...and i wouldnt hold that against him...hes a good ally for numbers rn...and it helps in case i swap with trevor and can stick with him too....but i feel more secure knowing i have david and matt on my side and they are closer with me than with owen....i dont really wanna lose...but voting duncan out rn would feel pretty good...hes made some snarky comments to me a couple of times and thats really my biggest criteria for wanting people out....you sass me you get my vote

LOGAN

anyway i wanna die but yay! no loss, and im safe one more round. prayin they vote off trevor. i dont trust you.

ROB

Rob: is there an edgic? Jay: yes Rob: thanks Then I better get positive tone this episode

COLIN

OMG YES WE DID THAT. ok why am I saying we. ROB DID THAT. HE TRULY DID. MY DAD MY KING MY ICON LOVE HIM. Omg I'm so happy we don't have to go to tribal. Now we just gotta survive ONE MORE ROUND before the swap, I'm sure we can pull it off. Wish us luck <3 <3

ALI

The plan for tonight is Crow... I feel like all is going to plan, as far as I know everyone has told me they're voting Crow, bar Ryan (whose told other members of my alliance that he is) and Scott the Silent. I just lied to Crow, and feel bad, but he seems too dangerous... Also, my alliance is now me, JD, Trevor and Lydia, but I'm also close to Isaac and Sam. I feel super in control for now... I for some reason get the impression I'm about to be idoled out, but c'est la vie

TREVOR AND LYDIA

https://youtu.be/UnL6LElg4ZY

ALI

I'm super nervous for tonight. Its like 'Baby's First Blindside'- its very exciting! Anywho, I love my 'The Leal Jousewives of Atlanta' alliance (Trevor,JD,Lydia and I) and I'd hate to be idoled out, when I'm lined up so well! :(

CROW

Ugh, I have a gut feeling that it's probably me tonight, but I have been told otherwise.......lesson learned: don't try and play two games at once xD I am voting for Scott because I know he's the person most likely (behind me) to get targeted/exiled from the tribe. My strategy (although it may look like I don't have one) was to test out the "Anybody but me" strategy, but it doesn't look too good right now... Maybe I'm just paranoid and it'll be 8-1 against Scott, but I have a feeling there's scheming going on that will likely result in my elimination. If I survive this, I pray there's a tribe swap so I can effectively redo my social game LOL, if not, well.....I'll just have to scrap along!

http://survivoremathia.tumblr.com/post/158048895251/tribal-council-2