#im in too deep theres too much happening and im in love with every single memeber of the cast so i cant just stop amd switch to spn

[daryl-fucking-dixon]

theres no better way to break in a new blog then posting NSFW ABCs that absolutely nobody asked for

listen to be honest with y'all I have a crazy sex drive and if I'm in the apocalypse with DARYL DIXON, then um! you better believe I want dick 25/8 (AND BEST BELIEVE ILL GET IT)

im really doing this because its almost like I'm decluttering my brain

CREDITS CREDITS CREDITSS!

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) ☆- We all know Daryl would clean you up and comfort you after sex, he's not the type to fuck and dump.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) ☆- I just feel like Daryl is a major tit guy. He loves them all. Small, big, saggy, he does not care. If it can fit in his hand and his mouth then there's not a single complaint.

☆- Daryl favors his arms, and he feels like a big strong man when you latch onto his bicep.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) ☆- Like I said once, and will be saying for the rest of my life, Daryl Dixon would love to creampie you.

☆- Facials?? He wants to cum all over your face and then fuck you missionary so he can watch the way his release runs down in your mouth and on your cheeks.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) ☆- Daryl Dixon's dirty little secret is that he keeps a pair of your underwear to jerk off with when he goes on long runs. (The longer you wore them for the absolute better)

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) ☆- Before the world ended Daryl didn't exactly have much sex, only a few hook-ups that happened in dark alleys when he was blasted on hard drugs.

☆- Season 1-4 Daryl would be completely lost. A total clutz when he's ripping your shirt off with trembling hands and very sloppily moving his lips against yours, eager yet needy.

☆- Season 5-11 Daryl wouldn't be as clueless after getting older, taking your shirt off first before pulling you closer by the waist, kissing you slowly and much more coordinated.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

☆- Cowgirl. Ride him to your hearts content. He loves loves loves being underneath you, moaning and whimpering as you bounce on his cock.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

☆- He's too gone in pleasure to be funny or sexy

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) ☆- Daryl is definitely hairy, but not too crazy. He's got a dark happy trail leading into thick pubes that rest rest above his base.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

☆- It depends on how clingy Daryl is and how stimulated he is. He likes to wrap his arms around you and bury his face into your neck so he can mark the skin.

☆- Some nights are filled with pure lovemaking, Daryl panting needily against you as he moans in your ear.

"Love ya so fuckin' much, so glad yer mine"

"Prettiest girl I ever seen, wanna make ya feel good"

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

☆- On those nights when he goes on long runs, all by himself with nothing but the song of nature around him, his head fills with all the memories of the softness of your body, inside and out.

☆- He often finds himself holding the fabric of your underwear against his face, whimpering into them as he twist his wrist and tease his tip, thinking about how badly he wanted to be buried deep inside your warm heat.

☆- Once just isn't enough for him. He'll stroke himself completely empty to the thought of you. The sounds of his very needy moans and wet drag of his cum-coated hand overrode the sound of nature.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

☆- DARYL DIXON CERTIFIED BREEDING KINK.

☆- Daryl also has a choking kink that works both ways.

☆- He loves to grip your throat from behind and watch how your face contorts with every thrust, listening to your breathless and choked-off moans.

☆- He also loves to watch the way you bounce on his cock, steadying yourself with your hands tightly around his neck, riding him desperately for your own pleasure.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

☆- Everywhere. If he can put your back against it, he can fuck you against it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

☆- You. No matter what you do, just once long glance and Daryl goes weak in his knees, biting his lips as his cock stirs.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

☆- Don't clown me but threesome. Daryl Dixon does not like to share his woman, friend or foe. He wants no other man to lay his hands, eyes, or dick on you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

☆- We all know that Daryl loves to eat pussy. Not matter how long or how many times he's done it, he will not get tired of the taste of you on his tongue and lingering in his mouth afterwards.

☆- He also loves getting head from you. The way you swirl your tongue around his tip and suck it drives his eyes into the back of his skull, a deep groan coming from his chest. Daryl is honestly an oral lover.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

☆- A pretty good combination of both. Depending on the mood, the night starts sensually with lots of eager kisses and roaming hands, Daryl's hips sloppily and lazily thrusting into you at first.

☆- When eager kisses become slow and deep, that's when lazy thrusts become quick and controlled, his cock sliding deeper into your velvety walls. Sometimes Daryl gets so wrapped up in how good he feels, he can't help how fast his hips start to snap against you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

☆- Only if it's absolutely safe. The first quickie you two ever had was horrifically cut short by a random walker almost biting the bare flesh of Daryl's neck, mid-orgasm at that!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

☆- He'd be iffy about a few things depending on what they are. The last thing he wants to do is hurt you in bed, but he also never wants to deny you of what you want. (I have no fucking clue what this letter means guys)

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

☆- On the nights where Daryl just needs to not think, he can go for as many rounds as his body can physically handle. He can last for a while during the first round, but it's after the second and third when he starts to struggle. He needily fucks the both of you completely stupid, only being done when a harsh dry orgasm rocks his entire world, gasping and sobbing against you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

☆- When Daryl finds your vibrator hidden behind your pillow, he gets a little curious and tries it on himself, sitting on the bed and taking his cock out, stroking himself a few times before clicking the button, feeling the toy buzz to life.

☆- He bites his lip rough when he presses it to his tip, a loud, choked whimper ripping from his throat.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

☆- Daryl only teases you when you tease him. The way you not so innocently bat your lashes at him and firmly grip his bicep gets him riled up for the day and gets you in a world of trouble for the night.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

☆- Daryl is typically a quiet guy, but he can get pretty loud in bed. A lot of the times he muffles any moans or whimpers into the soft skin of your shoulder.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

☆- Talked about this with one of my mutuals but I think Daryl would be a little bit into knifeplay. Nothing major, he just finds it really hot your life is quite literally in his hands.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

☆- Daryl definitely has a curved dick. It's a good solid eight inches and he's pretty thick. Circumcised as well.

☆- There's a long vein that runs along the underside, and a few more that become more prominent when he's hard.

☆- His tip is a cherry red and quite sensitive due to nerve damage. (from said circumcise)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

☆- Daryl used to barely think about sex, especially in the apocalypse. He'd still jerk off every so often, but not really that often. Only when he had nothing else to do, or really needed to stop thinking, which meant he was gonna jerk off for quite a while.

☆- His sex drive went through the roof after he met you, he simply couldn't get enough. It had only taken a few times before he was completely addicted to your body, and craved it each time he was away. he jerks off much more and much longer now

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

☆- It depends how many times he came. Sometimes he'll literally pass out right on top of you, still inside you.

☆- Most nights however he usually has enough strength to clean you up, and crawl into bed next to you, pulling you closer to his sturdy chest with his arms securely wrapped around you.

[hegoeshardasfuck]

dirty mind

wordcount: 0.7K

tags: sexting, unresolved sexual tension

synopsis: as much he's a good Weapon, he's also a bother sometimes

authors note: written for day 2 of kinktober! might be late to port some of them onto tumblr, but i hope ya'll enjoy!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59395495

Soul should know better than to reach for his phone as he waits for Death to declare his mission, but it's just so boring being a Death Scythe. He doesn't really ever get wielded by Death anyways, just lounges about. No wonder Spirit ended up spending so much time at Chupa Cabra's.

There's nothing to do except sit and wait.

And bother Maka.

He grins as he takes his leave with a dumb excuse of heading off for a walk. Death doesn't care enough to stop him, he never really used Soul anyways. He much preferred his twin pistols even now.

Soul meanders aimlessly until he finds a hidden little corner he's known of for years now. He drops down on the ground and opens up his phone before texting Maka "hey," with a slutty amount of y's.

yeah soul?

mmmmmmmnothing

bullshit

i just cant wait to get home

?

its sooo boring working for DTK these days, death scythe is not a good job

things were better when your hands were on me 24/7

im flattered

at least we still live together, no? god i cannot imagine living apart

itd be awful

yeah you got plans tonight? the usual

nothing?

nada zilch im free if youre free

someones eager

what do you have in mind? the usual actually wait are you teaching rn?

nope kids are all off on missions

okay great the usual being me fucking you hard

how hard?

stars

what happens if i fuck you? what then? you and i both know theres a strap under the bed, one that you looove to ride on

i doubt you could make me see stars

then gimme more to work with make this conversation something to read back on when youre on the job

alright alright well to start off our night i think i'd eat you out strip you down, piece by piece hold your thighs, one in each hand and work my way up i'd bite

how much?

bloody amounts

hot

now, i'd bite alllllll the way up your thighs not stopping for even a second, not even if you gripped my head by then i'd already be deep in your cunt fingers and tongue, one hand on your ass

so we're seated?

im on the ground

like the dog you are

you know i'd bark for you any day of the week

and you're on the edge of the bed my hands are in your hair pulling you closer

right right, im mashed up against you in the pussy having a great time leaving no scraps behind absolutely eating

soul.

getting off track sorry queen where was i......... right im in the pussy you cum once

im a little bit worn clawing into your scalp

i dont mind it at all when i can finally back away to breath i wipe down my lips then im back on you slowly pushing you down to the bed

slowly?

hastily i am hastily pushing you to the bed not slamming you, but im not going slow this definitely isnt our first time

definitely not

so youre down, laid out before me so pretty and i immediately start kissing on you lips, neck, chest, all of it nothing new but i should touch back on old territory

mhm

one hand on the mattress one hand on your leg usually you do the work ride me peg me fuck me itll be different tonight though

oh? you really think so?

i know it i'll take you so slow its agonizing missionary style too youll be begging before you know it if you thought i was a tease before im beyond unbearable now every single inch of your skin is gonna be mine only my hands will truly know it my lips as well i could go for a few rounds as many as you like no time for breaks in between creampied thoroughly by the end of it all i think thats where i'd call it a day lick you clean, make sure you're perfect we could sleep afterwards or watch a movie

you better hold true to this tonight

we'll see if DTK gets a mission for me might be too worn out if he does

youre a fucking tease

and you love it

i know

[teslacoils-and-hubris]

What the shit is everhood

(Info dump pls?)

Gladly! ^w^

so everhood is a game that I would say is very similar to undertale, from the pixel art style to the humour to the general uhh theme? i guess is the word? Where you play as a wooden puppet named red on a quest to get your arm back from gold pig. The battle mechanic is a rhythm based system where you have to jump around and over beats the enemies through at you. The music is absolutely fucking fantastic and i actually bought the soundtrack i like it so much lol

a couple battles get absolutely insane with the visuals too, to the point im not even totally sure i can do a description justice? you can check out this video if you're curious, theres really no spoilers in this battle but it shows what im talking about. these battles are where the photosensitivity warning really comes in though, so be cautious if that effects you

I can't go too deep into the plot without getting into spoiler territory, so i'll put that under the cut for anyone who's curious, but here's what I can say! You go around collecting clues to find gold pig and get your arm back, and along the way you get to meet all the wonderful characters that populate Everhood. Like Rasta beast, Noseferatchu the sneezing vampire, Flan and Muck, the dancing mushrooms, a vampire who's name always changes. You really get to know and love these characters while also learning that maybe everything isn't as it seems in Everhood. Maybe, actually nothing is what it seems. Maybe you're the only one willing to do something about. But..... are you willing?

oh also kermit is there and I think he might be god? Also you can kill him and it impacts literally nothing

Full plot summary under the cut. I highly recommend you play the game without spoilers, but if you're like me and you Need to know what happens before you play then go wild. I'll only be talking about the intended good ending though, since I haven't gotten around to playing the secret endings yet- oh also mild spoilers for undertale i guess if youre worried about that in 2023

so when I say its similar to undertale in themes, its sort of. in a reverse sense. In undertale the good ending is the pacifist route. By saving the monsters you help them escape the underground and better their situation. It is mercy, the direct functional opposite of killing, that saves you. There is no mercy kill because using mercy ends the fight period.

Well in Everhood, the good ending requires you to kill everyone.

Your arm was taken from you because you've done this before, wiped out countless lives, friends even. And now you must finish the job. Its hard and sad and it sucks but it has to be you because no one else is going to. It falls on you to go back to these spots you've been through already, these happy cheerful locations, and hunt down everyone you've come to know over the course of the game.

so why do you need to kill everyone? and how on earth is it similar to undertale at all? well, Everhood isn't just the title of the game or the location it takes place, its the state every single character in the game is stuck in.

in the distant past, humanity found a way to reach another world, one they called Everhood. And in this world, no one could ever die. Some people chose to stay in this world, which lost connection to the human world for some reason i dont remember rn, and in doing so slowly lost their humanity. They lived for eons and eons and eons, changing their shape and loosing themselves in the process. You discover at one point that the Green Mage, a chaotic character whom I love, has been keeping track of the years everyone has spent in Everhood, every year a tally on the wall of their secret playroom. It takes three hours to get to the end of this hallway, to give you an idea of scale here. three real time hours.

Your character, Red, is a vessel for the literal human player behind the screen to free the inhabitants of Everhood from eternity. They aren't really happy. They can't be. They've been stuck for so long, and even though they beg and plead for you not to kill them you have to. Its the only way for them to be happy and move on from Everhood. And don't get me wrong you CAN choose not to go through with it. You have to actively fight back after this reveal to kill anyone. I haven't played through this way, so I can't speak on it.

The ending is sort of ambiguous, in which Pink (the person pretending to be Red and letting you the player control them) goes to an afterlife after killing everyone and gets to see them one last time, and they're happy. They forgive you. One by one you talk to them and they thank you for freeing them, apologize for fighting you, and move on happily to whatever comes after death. I choose to interpret it literally, but there's something to be said about the idea it's all in Pink's head. I don't think it was meant to be taken that way, but its one way to look at it.

The game sort of looses people with this being the good ending. But I think it's a beautiful metaphor. Sometimes you keep doing things that hurt you only because you're used to it. Maybe you don't even realize how its hurting you, its better than the alternative right? For the longest time I kept my bedroom blinds perpetually closed because the bright sunlight gave me headaches. I didn't realize just how depressed it was making me to be in near constant darkness like that. It was only after I bought a plant on a whim that I realized how much happier I was letting in the sunlight. You get so used to bad habits and awful jobs and clothes you hate because they're familiar. And doesn't it just seem easier? To take non-action and let everyone keep living and having fun in Everhood? Green Mage hosts DnD every week (or whatever counts as a week after you've lived for eternity), go play with the mushrooms in the forest, doesn't that sound lovely? You don't have to kill anyone, just keep living on exactly as you were! You have friends here Red! It hurts too much to kill them! they don't want to die! why not just give up? How could anything good come from the pain of change?

[cyberneticlagomorph]

is there something you've got that you've worked really hard on and loved, but not really been able to share extensively, in Jack's world? yes this is an invitation to talk about it.

god theres so fuckin much

the second version of the lore doc is 104 pages long at present and this 3rd edition is gonna be AT LEAST that and some change

i have pages upon pages of weird stuff i've written down and mulled over and will never ever use bc i have no idea how to incorporate it into anything yet

like the-end-of-everything

ok so i gotta put this under the cut due to length and religious stuff and Theseus Hare spoilers

so the-end-of-everything is

a lot?

She's almost As Much as Jack

She's the personified Ending of Jack's Narrative, the Jabberwocky from Alice in Wonderland, the angel Lucifer, The Green Sun from Homestuck, Nidhogg from Norse mythology, Mr Eaten from Fallen London and a million billion other things

She exists currently as a weird dream ghost that has attached Herself to Jack to the point where he dreams about Her every night no matter what.

The same dream, every single night for as long as he can remember

In one of his earlier iterations on this blog, he had his ability to dream SURGICALLY REMOVED (don't ask me how he did it, he just did it, it was hard) and She still showed up every night like normal

You see, their fates are tied together. Jack is the Protagonist, and She the Antagonist, as well as the Ending to his story.

Her in universe lore is fucking WILD and i'm probably not gonna do much of anything with it on the blog for Reasons.

In universe She was made to be Fairyland's original captive star, but She was Too Much on many levels to the point where Her creators had Her lobotomized in hopes that would calm Her down. It did not, She eventually escaped and fucked off into deep space, where She met God (yes that God) and fell in love.

He made Her his favorite angel and named Her Lucifer. And then the shit in Eden happened and She got kicked out of heaven

She swore revenge against God for abandoning Her and when She tried to take that revenge She was torn apart and devoured by... something.

In older drafts it with other deities, im not sure about now tho, but Her leftovers were shoved into a well/hole/pit at the bottom of the universe where nobody could ever find them, Her True Name erased from all history and record. (Hence why we know Her as the Nameless Thing)

She wasn't dead though, not completely anyway. She found Her way into the world of dreams and spoke to people through them, She amassed followers and made plans.

And then a child was Born

Alice was born, many Alices in fact. Each born and grown and groomed for war and lost and lost and lost because they were not the right Alice to slay the Jabberwocky

Jack is supposed to be the Right Alice, Alice is actually his deadname and why his VTM alt is Named That. Jack is supposed to slay the Jabberwocky for good with the Vorpal sword and lock Her away inside of himself forever and always

See, Lucifer does not want that at all, She wants to find Her Name and pull Herself back together so She can kill God for what he did and then devour the multiverse bc everyone let God Do That to Her so they very much should all die about it.

THE THING IS

Outside of the in universe lore, She doesn't HAVE a fucking Name to find. The Writer never gave Her one, She was never supposed to win or leave or anything, and even if She was the Narrative is unfinished and abandoned so She's stuck in here with the rest of those virgins until She figures out a way to Fix That.

Also Lucifer and the elder god thing inside of Vorpal have major beef, they had beef before Vorpal died and became a bone sword. I'm 90% certain Luci is why Vorpal fuckin died but i might change that later. Vorpal was made exclusively to kill the Jabberwocky and other divine entities so if they didn't have beef before they sure do now???

ANYWAY

I wanna do so much with Her but i can't cuz writer's block has hands, I'm a coward, and vivzieverse made characters based on biblical figures Weird and Kinda Uncomfortable but The-End-Of_Everything is my fucking BABY and i can't wait for you to meet Her, also she looks like this in jack's nightmares:

art by @/pencilbrony my befriended

[jazz-kitty]

1, 2 , 7, 8 :3

1. favorite character[s]

ive already talked about kenneth and flora BUT! runner up is cera i think. i haven't seen her in a million years but that's okay. i think she's incredibly fucked up and i want to get her #OUT of her mental and also physical ice prison.

im preddyyyyyyy sure rn that angie is a fucked up cursed version of anju, but as "angie" she still made a servant. it just happens to be in the image of cella- taking some of her likeness & kind of her name- because even deep down the fragments of anju in angie still cares for cella. but i dont actually know. i think her dedication to angie is super fucked up and interesting though. angie doesn't care whether her meat homunculus made of illegal magic lives or dies, but cera is also so incredibly willing to lay down her life for her boss that somehow it works out. well. hopefully it stops working out bc i want cera to be able to live for herself but. AH! not much to say since it all happened like six chapters ago now sicne anyones even thought of cera but i still spin her aorund in my brain bc she's epic as hell. my friend said her ace was a morpeko :(((( thats so CUTE!!!

2. least favorite character[s]

i don't like saki or karen. what do you do when a character for most of their screentime is intended to be comedic relief and then you just don't find them funny. i feel like such a nerd but i just don't think they have jokes and theres not much else to like about them ToT at least as it stands. idk. even then i'll still draw both of them no problem i am not exactly a professional at disliking characters. my main issue with them is that they don't appeal to my sense of humor and if i'm drawing & writing them they do. so. problem solved?

erick is also kind of up there but he stays in his lane over in poison type gearen city [forgot the actual name] so he doesn't bother me as much. plus he has cat ears so he gets bonus points.

7. favorite friendship[s]

patty & cera have they ever talked? NO! have they ever talked about each other? NO! in a hypothetical situation, would it be kind of cute? YEAH!

for ones that r actually on screen though. i loveee neved & nastasia. even if it was just 1 conversation, i love their dynamic. the two most mature [AUTHORS NOTE: does not mean they are mature. just means they are not zetta geara or madelis] xen members havin a little chat and i'm TUNED IN!!!! and their shared affection for ren is so cute. they both know it's a bad idea and they BOTH tell each other it's a bad idea, and then immdiately just go Anyways, because they r BOTH going to continue caring about ren anyways. whateverrr. i think it's cute.

honorable mention delpha and adam. theyr eso sweet. they love each otherrrrrrrr they make fun of each other so much but they would kill someone for each otherrr <3

8. favorite family dynamic

florin and flora you're so. i talk about them too much. florin disowning flora after finding out she's in bladestar is soooo. oh my goodness! and then trying to get her the death penalty too!!! i think about how after florin says that he just wishes flora would trust him more- that he's there for her, if only she'd let him be- flora says THIS

its so. god dude. i feel like it's not just that flora was leading bladestar, but selfishly- florin cares more about the fact that flora never told him about it. and its soooo. oh my god. both of them care[d] about the other so much but are far too fucked up to ever be able to show it. flora feels like she's the only one who can ever get her job done- especially after rune turned her down- and she wants to keep florin SAFE by keeping him out of everything. and florin just wants to BE THERE for his SISTER!!! without understanding until darchlight cave why she's making it so difficult to!!! god!!! it's so evil how many times things could've gotten better and how many chances flora had to just let her brother love her and how every single time she refuses and florin gets pushed a little closer to the edge of a metaphorical cliffside. me when im in a lack of communication challenge and my opponent is flora who thinks letting her brother think she hates him and actively trying to get him to hate her is the simplest way to handle things. i hate rejuv

[kusundei]

it is so awful. bad because i know exactly what im expecting and i dont like knowing that fact and it all is just made so much worse because what am i meant to do? in times like those i do what i know. the only thing i do know and that is to be quiet and take it.

its an awful realization but i know its true. everytime something like that will happen what do i do? i shut up. i wont talk back. fighting gets me no where. you sit there and you take it and in both contexts its genuinely sickening

i just am so tired and i dont like that. im sorry im not home monday through thursday and i venture off on friday/saturday just to come back late on sundays. i knew what was going to happen and i let it and i guess i cant complain truly because im coping with it better than i thought i would. the only way i know how to cope is through guilt. if i feel guilty then there is no doubt in my head and this was meant to be and thats okay. ive been eternally selfish and i am a coward whos clouded by delusion and afraid of their own judgement. it IS wrong that i wonder what ive done to deserve this - selfish pretending that i am a saint all the while ive known that i am wretched - that ive always known deep down

she gets so upset and i understand why she is and i have always understood but what makes ME upset is that she does not understand why i am. maybe that is my curse that i am bound to always understand others (though that acknowledgement i have never used for the greater good) and that others will never understand me. it doesnt help me. i know it doesnt but i cant exactly help emotional reactions and i know the sort of reaction it gained from you. a guilt though masked by another wave of anger and resentment because that is WHO you are. emotional intelligence is not your specialty and it is abundantly clear every single time

And yes maybe it is my fault. i am not home im not helping but if i vocalized all those reasons why what kind of response am i bound to get? would honesty get me anywhere or would it bury me further into a fate i am not going to escape? theres no certainty in my judgement and thats why i take the safer option. im not upset because of what you said im upset at the fundamentals of why. you said what ypu said. you make fun of me for crying and it all leads back to the reason i dont ever cry. you make me stand there and cry in front of you as you just stare at me and say absolutely nothing TILL you do. and what is that met with? more tears. how am i supposed to take that? “why are you crying?” and then an abundance of claims that all make me look worse and make you look better. so in times like those you answer your own questions. truly when was the last time ive cried in front of you and you havent made fun of me? i know you let me just sit there and cry because youre too guilty to send me away because you know im just going to cry by myself. but you dont do anything to help it , you do everything possible to make iy worse. whats the reasoning behind that? im sure you feel some sort of remorse and i know uou look at me that way because you feel guilty but i know its all becausw you dont understand. you dont take the time to understand me and i wonder if i am just that complicated for you not to get? im not upset by my condemnation im upset over the fact i cant cry in front of you. i cant be upset and i cant be honest and i cant say yes mom that did make me sad and why cant you help me? why cant you ever tell me that its okay and that you are sorry? i dont even need an ‘im sorry’ i just want something that proves to me that you care and that youre not the way i frame you to be. i try to hard over and over again to understand where you are coming from and where you draw your conclusions and i will try endlessly to never truly blame you but why is that impossible?

all of the realization IS what kills me. when was the last time youve comforted me? when qas the last time ive hugged you and told you i loved you and i meant it and when was the last time ive laughed with you and had a normal conversation? when was the last time ive walked away from you without feeling something negative? when was the last time ive gone home and said to myself i wish i was home? when was the last time ive said i missed my mom? its awful and why cant i have that with you? i try and i try and i do but is it really all me? is it not you too? and i think abt it alot when i am with ajax because why is his family so nice? why do i feel comfortable over there and why can all of them talk and be normal? why is the energy here so different?

i dont even care anymore abt it i truly dont i am just. so upset because of how you respond to everything. “do you want to move out? give me the papers and i’ll sign them if you want to be emancipated so bad” and its just a whole slur of leading questions and accusations. it makes me sick because i cant respond to you correctly and j dont want to feel like i want that. i dont WANT to be emancipated. i dont want to move out i dont want you leave you all and i dont want to go and i dont want you guys to think of me this way and i dont want to think of you all this way either but what? am? i? supposed? to? do? i am stuck in such an awful position and i hate it and i cant keep dealing with this because is it really me? do i need to try harder? there is no benefit in it but what is it that im doing wrong? the things you blame me for are all things out of my (and your) control. that wasnt me and as much as id blame you for it i dont want to say that was you. that was life and thats not something that can be changed and im sorry i dont like to be home and i prayed to god that i wish i did

[gayspock]

or something

its all so fucking empty man its all so fucking empty i dont know whyits so much easier for everyone not to even do things but just be a fucking person man i donteven care i feel like im just forcing it down my own throat half the time im just nto here any more i havent been here for years its never going to matter or mean anything i dont know i wish i could even be dramatic and be like ohhhh everyone leave me behindddd but wouldnt that imply that there was anything to begin with god idont know i dont know i jsut get angry and fucking upset over everything theres nothing that helps nothing that ever fucking helps its non stop its just that that that until you roll over and force yourself to shut up or die and either way it doesnt matter it never fixes anything part of just wishes i could feel it matter foronce i dont need it fixed i dont need it to be better ijsut want one thing to feel likeits meant something even a fucking little bit i think every day about that i wish i killed myself properly as a kid something something you'll regret it in your last moments i dont think ive spent a single fucking day where ive went to bed at night and thoguht that meant something i dont think a single day of my life has been anything to anyone but made me upset and miserable something something ive just been on this stupidfucking cycle for years and years and years. it has never not once been fucking worth it for a second living past that. i should have fucking died when i was 16 and sad. fuck every single fucking thing ive done since then and i mean that. something something loop and loop and loop you .want to kill yourself so badly and feel so overcome with loneliness and cry more because you cant make anything right start to fade out lose months let them go by until it breaks down again and back to that and theres no change its just back and forth ive not gotten anywhere ive circled in my fucking cage endlessly and i wish it mattered i wish a day fucking mattered i wish it could have meant something once just once i dont talk to anyone i just fucking sit and cry and its been so long and

i cant do it right i feel liek im insane sometimes because everyone talks about struggling it makes me want to fucking claw my eyeballs out the next fucking cutn to share their struggles with me . because yeah fucking sucks i wont say it doesnt suck nonetheless i feel like such a rancid fucking cunt for i. ecause god i want to fucking really hurt people sometimes. oh im sad so youre telling me oh youre alone youre fucking alone too. how the fuck does that make me feel when your parents love you you talk to people people would notice if you disappeared you have a partner or have had partners that love you. theres someone i cant manage anything i cant do it any more i never fucking managed it because its not just the now its not just oh it sucks now its just been a structural. its been everything its never not been fucking like this i keep tryng i feel like im just a freak and sometimes i wish there was something fucking wrong with me for real its jsut theres nothing in there worth sticking around for or loving and i know thats what it is deep down but i cant even simulate it properly i cant fucking muster anything i cant fake interests in things i cant fucking do it im too fuckig tired i dont wantto wake up any more i dont want it to get better because it fucking wont im fucking sick of ti im just waiting for it ot end and i just feel like everyonekeeps telling me it'll get there but its nothing but an excuse to get me to fucking shut up because it doenst matter its a fucking sit there and fucvking rot you fucking worthless bitch i wish theyd just be honest with me sometimes i wish anyone would just be fucking honest i wish people would have me around even if they dontlike me i dont care what happens any more i cant do it i keep trying i cant do it its just every fucking time i dont know i dont have it in me i dont have anything in me and it doesnt matter i wish it mattered ive tried and i just dont know what im doing wrong and im just always some bitter jaded assholeand i know its making it worse but i cant . fucking do it any more . i feel like im being insane or whatever oh you mustnttttttt ive been having insane thoughts about other shit again i feel so removed from everything and redacted or redacted how i cant do it cuz of work, thinking about taking a month out just so i can repeatedly redacted without anyone fucking getting in my business but who cares i think i should quit and well what then i dont know i need somehting to fucking stop theres nowjhere to go theres nothing to do DOES ANYONE FEEEL. CRAZY i feel like i get further every day and i was already so fucking removed i struggled so badly but the more and the more time i spendthe worse it fucking gets i cant fucking level with anyone any more and i cant get back by myself im not fucking enough to do it i dont man i think does anyone feel MENTAL

[madisonrooney]

getting emotional about miley again woohoo

i know i talk a lot about dove. like a lot. but i hope people know how much miley still means and will ALWAYS mean to me. and i dont just mean that in just like a nostalgic, retrospective sense. no like she is still an active part of my life and thats never gonna change.

things are different than how they were in 2009-14, i cant deny that. but theres no one to blame for that. my migration to dove was totally natural and understandable since we established an actual irl relationship, and even before and besides that, she was always more accessible than miley bc she wasnt a worldwide phenomenon right out the gate. i got deep into miley WELL after her place in the world was established, but even if id gotten fully hyperfixated at the beginning, it wouldnt have been much different. who knows if dove is ever gonna reach that level. and im sure it also has to do with the fact that dove and i are much closer in age, as well as the characters shes played.

but that doesnt mean dove has entirely replaced her. and like i said, its more than just a "this impacted me in my past and im grateful for that looking back and i enjoy it casually now but thats about it" like no. my face still lights up every time i see her. i still stop in my tracks any time i hear any of her songs in public. i still excitably keep up with any new thing she does.

its just harder to establish myself as a miley fan with being a dove fan taking up most of my personality AND her being so mainstream that people think "yah a lot of people are miley fans" like sure but you dont understand im different lol.

quarantine really revitalized my l&m hyperfixation and my dove hyperfixation as well as a result and i think it made me put it a little too far ahead of hm and miley. after watching hmtm and the concert movie back to back with friends earlier this year, right before endless summer vacation came out, her meaning in my life really slapped me in the face for the first time in a long time like "god. what have i been doing." this isnt to say l&m and dove arent still up at the very top. the thing is, they BOTH are, and i need to remember that.

i found a post of mine from like two years ago where i called l&m "the best thing that ever happened to me." and like. what was i thinking. i wouldnt have been ALIVE to SEE l&m if it werent for hm and miley. is it ONE of the best things to ever happen to me? absolutely. did it, as a whole, come with fewer cons in my life than hm/miley did? arguably, yah. hm kinda caused the problems it ended up solving, but i still dont know where id be or if id even still be here without it. so i dont think anythings ever gonna top it.

they both impacted me in very different ways but both monumental, which is why i dont think its fair for me to put one over the other. i dont think i can say i have a single favorite show or favorite person. it has to be both. i think its fine in casual conversation to refer to one as "my favorite" but its not unlike calling more than one person your "best friend" yknow?

so plz dont let my love of one think that takes away from the other. admittedly, there have been times over the last 9 years where one distracted me from the other for some time, but deep down, i love them both so so dearly. but miley will still always get that extra bit of credit bc frankly she saved my life. and i need to make sure i make that clear.

tl;dr amanda has TWO hands

[djsangos]

its fine i also took a minute to get back to this weve both got lives it happens

hope everythings alright

so what im learning lately is that 9 times out of 10 if a civilization falls hubris was probably the #1 cause apparently

'the eradication of all existing life was a worthy sacrifice' cod damn if that doesnt sound horrifyingly familiar why do so many people operate this way

and now you guys are dealing with the consequences of that guys hubris it really is all hubris all the way down isnt it

thanks i guess but it did take me a minute. and also becoming captain to really implement much change about it but thankfully gramps' attitude started changing a little bit too

its harder to rationalize whats happening when youre actively partaking in invading the 'enemys' homeland to indiscriminately attack and steal back what they stole first

like sure i guess neither side in this conflict was really in the right but was all that really fucking necessary when a better solution was staring us right in the face

the theft of the great zapfish couldve been avoided if

i dunno

all the octarians' attempts at getting power in other ways werent always immediately thwarted by an old man stuck in the past?

like i love gramps im really glad hes changed his mind about a lot of things but come on

but tbh i get it when youre deep in the trenches of danger its hard to get your head out of the mud and take a proper gander at the propaganda against the backdrop of live combat and war

wait hang on those are actual bars cod damn

anyway at least you realized eventually right

ill accept the luck anyway theres definitely some shit im still just as blind to

like the grizzco bullshit cod the grizzco bullshit how did i let THAT slip under my radar for so fucking long

yeah space bear long story

or i guess the bear wasnt FROM space he was from earth but he used a space ship and went to space in the service of his Master Plan so

space bear

as for our funding lets just say the former captain has some rich relatives

not that hes ever paid any of us directly which is why we all have other jobs and all this is entirely an If You Can/Want To sort of situation

most of us just stuck with it because were freaks i think and tbh i think im too in over my head to just bail now even if i wanted to (which i dont)

i help my agents financially when i can obviously but mostly doing just freelance gigs isnt exactly the most stable income but hey album sales have been gaining traction so that helps

but yeah im a dj

until recently ive mostly just done remixes or live sets but i did release my first actual original album a little while ago

my style can vary i typically just throw whatever im thinking/feeling into the song im working on and go from there

which apparently tends to come across as more eccentric/alternative according to listeners idk

but that process is exactly why i only have one single original album release even though ive had my name as a dj out there since i was like 16

music im pretty sure is important to every culture but its super important to us fish people to us its the truest form of expression/communication in addition to just being really fucking hype and fun to listen to so when it comes to my songs i get all self conscious about what it is theyre saying without me even really meaning to say or i feel like they say something a little Too private for an audience it so a lot of my original works go unreleased its just the way it goes

anyway enough of me yapping what kind of music do you like gladiia

Apologies for the delayed response; a small matter was brought to my attention, and I had to swiftly resolve it before it became any less small. It's a pleasure to meet you, Captain.

To answer your question, the existential threat we face are called the Seaborn, though we now know that name to be somewhat inaccurate. Centuries ago, we made first contact with them in the depths of a benthic canyon. We found a mostly-slumbering form of strange, alien life. It was more adaptable than anything we'd ever seen. Not only could it acclimate almost instantly to any environment, including vacuum, it could mimic the form and function of anything it consumed. The few awakened terrors resembled a chimera of native wildlife, and had become the apex predators of their ravine. We quickly moved to contain this species, as it had already disrupted the local ecosystem, and if left unchecked could be disastrous. We failed.

We recently uncovered the origin of this plague: these monsters that forever grow, forever evolve, which have taken control of vast swathes of the ocean; monsters that adapt to every weapon used against them; monsters that have learned to take on the form of our weapons. They are not natural, but manmade. Built by the hubris of an ancient civilization that must have believed it could defeat death, if only it could make something stronger. Perhaps fearing the eradication of all life at the hands of an unknowable threat, a threat we have only seen the briefest of glimpses of, it created a form of life that could survive the end of everything. But life survived that civilization's fall, and it may not survive the consequences of what they left behind.

The Seaborn may have slumbered forever in the laboratories that contained them, an unfinished work of pure arrogance, had it not been for one of Ægir's own scientists. Fearing the return of the apocalypse that wiped out our precursors, he awakened Ishar'mla, the great titan among those the Seaborn call the Firstborn. The eradication of all existing life was, in his eyes, a worthy sacrifice for the preservation of life itself.

I applaud you for recognizing the folly of your command on your own. I was not so quick to catch on. Perhaps the severity of the threat made me blind to the depths of Ægir's depravity.

I wasn't ignorant to Ægir's faults, but I rationalized them as functional necessities. It's easy to believe that you're doing the right thing, that nothing can be done about the cruelties you witness around you, when your skies are so darkly clouded you cannot imagine a sun beyond them. I'd wish you luck in keeping a moral righteousness in your command, but you don't seem to need it.

...

Hold on a second, space bear?

Thank you for elaborating. It may say something about me, or perhaps about Ægir, that it's difficult for me to imagine a military whose operations are not fundamentally intertwined with law enforcement and civilian bureaucracy. Where does your funding come from, if I may ask? It's a militia, so I have to assume it's not from some public institution. I can imagine some system of self-sufficiency in the sale of services, or a reliance on donations from members or the public, but I don't wish to assume anything.

I've left this for the end, if only because it's the subject that's caught my interest the most. You're a DJ? For what sort of music? Can you offer any comments on your style? Systems of government, nations, militaries—of course I'm interested in these things, for they've occupied much of my life. What truly captivates me, however, is art and expression.

[teeforhee]

I tried so hard to fall into supernatural and binge the whole thing in like a month but instead I've watched like 24 hours of critical role in the past 2 weeks not including talks machina and now the voice in my head speaks in 7 different voices at once

[peachiimilquetea]

something angsty with tenya leaving fem reader for the event? ty! prompt: “you can’t leave me. i don’t know how to survive without you.”

“𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞. 𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮.” + tenya iida

a/n: bro… i don’t really like angst without the potential for a somewhat happy ending so i hope you’re ok with the fact that it’s not completely sad. i did pull on the heartstrings quite a bit tho, i hope you enjoy! check out the event here

contains: angst (obviously), iida being heavily influenced by his family, tensei to the rescue lowkey, crying, insecurities, mentions of alcohol, ambiguous ending, miscommunication

length: 2.0k

at first things had started off small.

iida worked long hours as the work of his brother’s hero agency fell on his shoulders. he tried his best to make time for you, but it always felt like your schedules could never line up just right.

you tried to work something out, quick calls on break times and cute messages around the house to remind you of one another, but most efforts fell flat.

then things started to get worse.

long and empty nights were spent building up resentment towards the man you had married. he was always doing something, something that took precedence over the vows you made when you walked down the isle no more than three years ago.

you knew his family didn’t like you that much, feeling that a marriage for love was a waste of such a powerful commitment. a commitment that could built them an empire, and boost the rank of their hero agency, solidifying a legacy for them.

tenya defied them for you, boldly declaring that he would marry whoever he wanted and that you were in it for the long haul. you were the girl of his dreams, he said, and anything that got in the way of his happiness was not something he would subscribe to. that only made them hate you more.

so when his texts of encouragement grew shorter and more sparse, and he began to have more special responsibilities bestowed upon him by none other than his father, you knew it was on purpose.

unfortunately, it was an effective strategy to chip away at a young and unseasoned marriage.

“tenya can you please just check your schedule? i really want to spend more time with you.”

he sighed and rubbed his temples as he sat in his office. why were you bothering him with something so insignificant? you knew how important this transition of power was for the iida family, for the legacy of ingenium, but you still persisted.

he could feel the anger beginning to build until he looked in your eyes and saw the sadness brimming in them. his heart squeezed in his chest as he watched you, his wife, plead with him to spend time together. when had things come to this?

“i’ll try my best, but i cant promise anything.”

at this point, that was better than anything you could’ve hoped for.

with a kiss to his forehead you left him alone to get the heaps of paperwork he had to do, spirits lifted at the prospect of spending time with him again. just like the way it used to be.

you checked the time on the microwave for the 9th time. fifty-seven minutes had passed and your husband was officially late.

you should have seen it coming really, empty promises were becoming more and more common amongst the two of you. he would promise to try harder and you would promise to cut him more slack, the constant push and pull never being enough for either party.

getting up from the barstool at your kitchen island you made your way to the wine cooler to get a drink. not even bothering to pick up a glass you slumped on the couch, kicking off your shoes and splaying yourself out, just wanting the cushions to swallow you whole and dull the aching in your heart.

he wasn’t coming.

he was never coming.

you laid passed out on the couch when iida finally came home 2 hours later. he was only stopping by for a quick break, then going back out on patrol and he completely forgot about the things he said, smiling through tired eyes as he thought, this time i’ll make it up to her.

at the very least he could clean you up and tuck you in. he could brace himself for the impending fight later, but he was concerned about you. you never drank, not unless there was something wrong.

iida easily hoisted you up over his shoulder, discarding the various wine bottles and taking you to your shared room, although he wasn't sure if it was still considered shared anymore.

he laid you on the bed softly, changing you into one of his old shirts. his fingers ghosted over your cheek as he watched you sleep, the reality of where he was sitting heavy on his heart.

he loved you and yet there was nothing he could do to help at this moment. he had to leave for night patrol. he had to leave you.

his gentle touches roused you from your sleep and your eyes felt heavy as you tried to blink them open.

“you came?” you breathed, voice sounding foreign even to yourself.

iida gave you a small smile, “im sorry.”

your demeanor did a 180 at his apology. he was sorry. he was always sorry. but sorry couldn’t fix this. not when it had been so broken.

you winced and sat up, “sorry for what? sorry that you broke your promise for the thousandth time or sorry that you’ve been such a shit husband for the past few months?!”

“______-”

“no tenya. you do this every single time! every time i want to spend time with you theres always something more important! what could be more important than your wife?!”

“______ you know my father-”

you laughed bitterly at the mention of his dad. he always had to be such a good little iida child, always on daddy’s beck and call. it made you sick.

“your father doesn’t even want us to be together! cant you see that he’s doing this on purpose! youre a grown man! not a child permanently tied to his mommy and daddy!” you spat

“hes giving more responsibility for the sake of the agency! for the ingenium legacy! why are you always so selfish when it comes to these things?”

“selfish? selfish?” you asked, incredulous. you couldn’t believe your ears.

“yes selfish. do you know how much i sacrificed to be with you? how much i already have on my plate on top of trying my best to make time for you?”

you stared in astonishment.

sacrifice?

what had he sacrificed for this relationship? he got to do what he wanted, come and go as he pleased with virtually no regard for how you felt or what you did. what sacrifice was there in that way of living?

“fuck you, tenya.”

tenya took a deep breath and ran his hand down his face. he chose his words carefully before finally saying, “i cant do this. im leaving.”

you could hear a pin drop in the room. you felt your blood pound in your ears as you stood up quickly, dizzy from the alcohol but still trying to process the words you had just heard.

leaving?

“youre leaving?”

“yes, i have to go. im not doing this with you, not now.”

your heart felt like it had been smashed by a sledgehammer, as you tried to regulate your breathing. leaving. he was leaving.

“w-wait,” you feebly attempted to cling onto him as he gathered a few of his things.

“tenya you cant leave me.”

“_____ i do not want to do this right now,” he sighed, easily shaking you off and moving to collect more things. his words were buzzing around on the inside of your skull. he was leaving.

leaving without so much of a second thought. he had been planning this. still unsteady on your feet you hobbled after him as quickly as possible, desperation taking over every fiber of your body. you didn't want to lose him, you just wanted your husband back, you happiness back.

“y-you cant do that! you cant leave me! i dont know how to survive without you, tenya, please-”

“_____, just go to bed. you’re drunk.”

you trailed him around the house,“no, you don’t get to decide when this is over. i'm the one whos been hurting for months you cannot just leave me by myself.”

iida spared you one last glance before grabbing his bag, “goodbye, _____”

crushed, you sank to your knees, leaning on the couch for support. you felt like you were dying., hell, you probably were dying. you had never had so much to drink in your life, and you were desperate to make the pounding pain in your chest stop.

you cried yourself to sleep that night, waking up to the sunlight coming through the window with a splitting headache. you felt like your skull was trying to crack itself open from the inside but you shakily got to your feet, remembering bits and pieces from your fight with iida.

you could tell he didn't come home last night; everything was exactly the way you had left it last night. the house alarm was still on, and his shoes were gone.

he actually left.

anger bubbled in your chest as you thought about what had actually happened. you would not let him get the last laugh, or be the last one left, the one waiting on him patiently to pick up the pieces after trying to keep it together. you would leave too, as much as it hurt, and show him just how selfish you could be.

in a flash, you haphazardly packed a bag with essentials and had texted your friends that you needed a place to stay for a few days. you didn’t get into specifics- your heart ached too much to relive the events of the previous night- but you told them you had reached your limit and you needed to take some time to cool off.

alternatively, iida did not sleep that night. after finishing patrols, he stayed at his brother’s apartment out of pure convenience, not feeling prepared to face you after everything that had transpired between the two of you.

the dark-haired man laid staring at the ceiling of tensei’s guest bedroom, wracking his brain and trying to pinpoint how things had gone south so fast. he wanted to fix things, but really didn’t know how. he couldn’t even tell you what was broken, let alone how to begin to fix them.

his brother had tried to give him advice after listening to the entire story, but there was only so much he could do. he knew that you were right, their father was keeping him from you on purpose, slowly making tenya think that he was in the right in an attempt to break you up, but he couldn't be the one to tell him.

tenya had to come to that conclusion himself. he needed to be the one to set boundaries and save your relationship, but from the looks of it, soon any attempts would be futile.

“_____? darling?” iida called as he came into your home. immediately noticing your missing shoes, he moved to the bedroom in a flash, checking to see if you had just moved them or something.

the room was a mess, drawers left open and clothing strewn across the bed and floor. the bathroom had been cleared of almost all your essentials, and a note was left on the dresser. gingerly, iida picked it up and read it, offering up a silent prayer that it didn't say what he thought it did.

i don't know when you'll see this, or if you ever will. if you're reading it, that means you came back home but you will not find me there.

im tired, tenya.

im tired of always being the one to extend the olive branch or bend over backwards for you.

i refuse to be in that position any longer. i love you… i love you so much it hurts sometimes because i know this isn't the way things were supposed to be. but you left, and so i decided to leave too.

if a way to fix things exists, i want us to find it, but right now i need some time to reevaluate us and what that means. i hope you understand, i know you will.

if you want to reach out, im open to talking about this further, but for right now i need to think.

goodbye.

--------

[daddyfordaeddy]

Pairing: Jinyoung x gn!Reader Warnings: its smut. its badly written smut. its a handjob. the lightest dom/sub undertones ever because idk how to write that. the reader is the more dominatn one in this situation. theres cursing. light blood but not sexual.

Summary: Jinyoung cuts his hand at work. You lend him yours. I will never not make puns. Genre: Smut Word Count: 2031 This is a request for @crzy-devil​ 

im sorry that the ending isn’t quite what you wanted but i was struggling and didn’t wanst to make you wait any longer. i hope you enjoy it.

You know Jinyoung’s job can be dangerous. All the stunts he has to perform, you worry a little. But he can handle himself most of the time, you try not to worry too much. You trust him enough to tell you if it’s hurting or if he’s stressed. No matter how late he stays filming, you’re always sitting up to wait for him to return to your shared home so you can kiss away all the tiredness in his eyes before the two of you head to bed.

This time, his drama is more action-based than his other ones, and as a result, you start to worry more. Even if he isn’t the lead, he has plenty of screentime, most usually shots of fights. You see behind-the-scenes videos of Jinyoung in action and every day you worry a little more each time. When Jinyoung comes home he tries not to make you worry but he’s naturally vocal about how he feels and so you get a little more insight into his job and how much stress it gives him and you just feel even worse.

When Jinyoung comes home one evening, with a tight smile on his face warning bells ring in your head. “Jinyoungie, hi,” you start carefully, “how was the set today? You get a break this week, right?”

Jinyoung sighs, “Kind of. They cut short the break so I’ll only be here for a four-day weekend.” Your lips purse but you say nothing else. Jinyoung heads straight into the bathroom, knocking into the doorframe once before entering with a short curse and your eyebrows fly into your hairline.

“Love, you good?” you ask, slowly standing and making your way over to the doorframe to peek in. Jinyoung’s head snaps up and he looks at you with a wide-eyed stare, but that’s not where your eyes are trained on. You’re currently looking at his hand, which has a long, deep gash on it, and it’s bleeding rather worryingly. “Jinyoungie, what happened?”

Jinyoung is just looking at you sullenly. “I cut myself on one of the falling lights. The director bumped into it. It’s fine, really.” You level him with a glare as you bend down to get the gauze.

“Honestly, Jinyoung, I worry, you know. Go sit down at the counter and I’l be out soon.” As Jinyoung opens his mouth to complain you tut. “No, don’t argue with me. Go sit.”

Jinyoung sulks, but he understands and lets you fiddle around with the cabinets as he does as you tell him. When you exit the bathroom a few minutes later, you see him idly tracing patterns into the countertop as he has his cut hand wrapped in his shirt to stop the blood from dripping all over the counter. “You didn’t get a damp paper towel?” you admonish him gently as you approach him and take his hand in yours. “Now your shirt will get all bloody. I’ll have to handwash it.”

Jinyoung pouts and you laugh a little at his expression as you dab lightly around the wound with a washcloth. He doesn’t say much, opting to watch you clean up his hand and put some ointment before dressing and wrapping it in gauze. When you finish, you bring his hand up to your mouth and press a quick kiss to the wide palm. “Take care of yourself, you know.”

Jinyoung softly laughs, puckering his lips with a playful whine. You sigh but lean in to kiss him as he wishes. You’re soft for this boy and you know it. When his hands find their way to your waist, you tut and pull away. “I don’t want you reopening the wound or something, Jinyoungie.”

Jinyoug just whines and loops his arms around your waist, letting his head rest on your shoulder. “But babe,” he draws out the vowel, “I’m dying and I’m lonely.” You laugh at his desperation, letting your hands travel up to his chin to tilt it and allow deeper kisses.

“I really don’t think it’s a good idea? It’s not like I think you’ll be unhinged or something, but if your hand is out of commission…”

Jinyoung just presses his face even more into your neck. “Like it when you take care of me, though. I want to be pampered. I’ll even let you call me baby.” Your ears burn bright red at that and your palms get a bit sweaty. Jinyoung giggles at your obvious reaction, pressing a light kiss to your warm skin.

Though your face is red, your grip on his jaw tightens slightly. Jinyoung lets his jaw fall lax at the pressure and the anticipation of what’s to come. You lean in again, pressing a hungrier kiss to his mouth, enjoying his willingness to let you do what you want. Jinyoung’s hands find your hips, digging in his fingers but you pull away at the feeling.

“Baby, you sure?” you ask, trying out the nickname as well, and Jinyoung flushes all the way to his neck. It’s a pretty sight, and you have to refrain from leaning down and marking up the skin. Jinyoung nods, and you raise a single eyebrow. “Words, Jinyoungie.”

“Yes, please, god, please,” Jinyoung finally pleads, teeth finding purchase in your collarbone. “Touch me, please.” You trail your fingers down from his jaw to his shoulders, setting onto his lap. It’s not too comfortable of a seat, you don’t want to make him fall off the barstool, but Jinyoung just laves his tongue across your now bruising marks.

You pull his hands away from your waist, letting his hands curl around the edges of the stool he is on. “Don’t move your hands, all right, Jinyoungie?” The words are a bit heavy coming out of your mouth, but Jinyoung enjoys it, nodding vigorously and gripping the stool until his knuckles are white. “Er...maybe loosen your grip. I don’t want you to stress your wound.”

Jinyoung lets out a short laugh at your words, and your face burns but you power through. When Jinyoung opens his mouth, you press a finger against his lips. “Don’t make a sound unless I ask you, yeah? I want to make this all about you.”

When Jinyoung nods silently, you smile and give him short praise, pressing a kiss to the corner of his jaw. He squirms a little, but with a little warning nip to his neck, he stills as you trail your hands down the broad expanse of his chest to his hips. When your fingers dip into the waistband of his pants, his breath hitches, but you pull your fingers out just as fast. Jinyoung’s lips tighten a bit, willing himself to not make a sound and you giggle brightly. Jinyoung shoots you a glare but when he does, your hand presses into his crotch and instead he lets out a hiss. You settle onto his thighs as your hand creeps back into the waistband of his sweatpants. This time, even if his breath catches, you continue on your descent and slide into his boxers as well.

Jinyoung’s hips kick and you laugh at that, pulling your hands away. “You need to stay still, Jinyoungie. I can’t make you feel good if you don’t let me.” Jinyoung hisses through his teeth, letting his head fall forward onto your shoulder. You can tell he’s not above begging, so you slide off his lap and haul him to his feet.

“(Y/N), please,” Jinyoung begs, “I’m so close.” You laugh again and let his words slide.

“I know, baby, come on, we have lube in the bedroom. I don’t want to chafe your cock, yeah? I want you to feel good.” Jinyoung pouts again but lets you hold his hand and pull him toward the bedroom.

As you rifle through the bedside table for some lube, Jinyoung settles completely on the bed, back against the headboard. When you turn around, he opens his arms up and you sigh a little but settle into his lap again. However, instead of resting your weight fully onto his thighs, you stay on your knees, pulling at the hem of his pants until his hips lift up and he lets you remove his sweats and boxers.

You grab the lube and twist the cap open. It’s just about half empty but it’s all you need anyway. As you drizzle it onto your palm, Jinyoung obediently fists his hands in the sheets after you shoot him a look and a quirk of your lips. His cock is hard, drooling precum out of the tip, and you’ve hardly touched him. You feel a little pride run through your body but try not to get ahead of yourself.

When you finally have a sufficient enough amount of lube on your hand that it drips onto Jinyoung’s thighs, you finally wrap your hand around his length. Jinyoung bites his lip, drawing blood as he tries not to let a sound escape from his lips. You laugh again, leaning forward and pressing your lips against his as you twist your hand slowly, thumbing over the head of his dick. Jinyoung licks against the seam of your lips eagerly, as if trying to distract himself from the cries in his throat.

When you squeeze just right, in that way you know Jinyoung would die for, Jinyoung can’t help but moan into your mouth, and you laugh right back. You don’t cease your stroking of his cock nor do you speed up, letting Jinyoung whine and wriggle just a tad before you nip at his lips and whisper a warning, “stay still, baby.”

Jinyoung looks like he might cry if you drag this out any further, and so you take pity and sit back on his thighs again, working his dick with more fervour and watching Jinyoung throw his head back and shudder. His dick twitches violently when you rub your lube covers thumb along the veins and you smile at the sight. “Are you close?” It’s a rhetorical question, you’ve known Jinyoung long enough to know when he wants to come, but he lets a moan rip out of his throat and whines a yes anyway.

You laugh, letting your hands come down to fondle his balls. “You can come, baby.” Jinyoung’s back arches as he whines. When he lands back down on the bed with a thump, his cock finally shoots ropes of cum onto his chest and it dribbles down to your hands as well. You continue to stroke him through it, up until he whines from the overstimulation.

You wait until he finally relaxes and looks at you with tired eyes when your hand drags up his stomach, gathering the cum pooling. His eyes widen when you bring your hand up to your mouth and lick the excess off. He can only let out another breathy groan, finally letting his hands come up from the bedsheets and he makes grabby hands at you.

You laugh open-mouthed again, falling into his arms and peering up at him as he smiles back and brushes some hair out of your face. “Love you,” he whispers as he leans down to pepper kisses all over your face.

“I love you too, baby,” you giggle, capturing his face with your hands and pressing a long kiss to his lips. He doesn’t mind the taste of himself on you, just licking into your mouth and pulling you impossibly closer with an arm around your waist. “Hey, quick question.”

Jinyoung raises an eyebrow. “You just jacked me off and you want to ask me a question? What is it?”

“What’s the director’s number? I might have to have a few words with him on the matter.” Jinyoung snorts, his hands cupping your ace and stroking your cheeks with his thumbs. You pout. “He messed up my boyfriend’s hand because of his fucking incompetence. I wanna sue him, Jinyoungie.”

Jinyoung just leans down to give you another kiss and you willingly return it. “I love that you’re caring baby, but don’t worry about it. I’ll deal with it, yeah?” You just pout again and Jinyoung spends the rest of the day kissing it away.

[alreadyblondenow]

Changes

Johnny x reader // SMUT, angst, fluff, virgin!reader Summary: Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself. Word count: 3k Warnings: Virginity loss, swearing, explicit mature themes, virginity kink?, corruption Note: If some words were misplaced, I apologise in advance. Half assed proofread hehe I’ll edit tomorrow im so sleepy. If you read already, Im sending you love. And thanks for putting up with shit hihi

You remember being a good daughter during high school. How you manage to have a high GPA just so you could make your parents proud and go to a nice college.

And when you got in to your dream college, you remember doing everything right during your those four years. Studied harder than ever and almost broke your back from staying up in front of your computer to finish your thesis. It was always about doing the right thing, staying on track, keeping out from trouble, always so sure what to do next after accomplishing the another. Until you met Johnny. It was the first time you felt so dumb and stupidly in love.

“Baby its not even in yet” you were sure that Johnny’s cock was inside already because the stretch hurts. It hurts so bad you can’t breath properly. “It fucking hurts.”

Johnny let out a giggle, kissing your breast while being half inside you, “Baby it supposed to hurt you’re a virgin” he’s clearly enjoying teasing you underneath him and savouring the tightness of your pussy for the first time. “My virgin”  kissing you a little too sweet and soft even though he’s cock is making your eyes teary. He pushes in again slowly with your consent and fucks you slow, then fast when he sees you relaxing already.

“Johnny wait - it really fucking hurts baby” you pant asking for more time. “Okay okay, Im going slow again, sorry. I thought-“ and he fucks you slowly again, kissing your neck and collarbones.

When the pain was gone, Johnny feels good inside you. You let a string of curses, kissing and bitting him almost covering his face with spit. With a steady and deep pace you were slowly getting why people love having sex. “Still hurting?” Johnny already knew the answer but he wanted to hear it from you. “Not anymore? Hmm. My virgin girlfriend?” you hum at the pet name he calls you. What a weird thing to call you, you thought. But you love it.

Drowned by lust and pleasure, you didn’t notice Johnny was picking up his pace. He’s to experienced for a virgin like you. The both of you can only groan and moan from the feeling you give each other. Exchanging kisses and bites to show affection and appreciation.

“Ugh you’re almost there now aren’t you?” Johnny asked in between fucking you faster than before but not enough to wreck you. “Feels good now yeah?” he grabs you legs and puts it closer to your chest for a new angle.

“Baby - You fuck good” you gulp, trying to help yourself speak while he fucks you with the new angle. “Is this what I’m missing for months now?” and theres Johnny’s smirk again

“Im afraid so baby, Im afraid so”

You whine when he slowed down his pace. “Do you mind if I play a bit?” you didn’t gave him an answer but Johnny proceeds anyway. He knew you’re at the edge already and being the experienced one between the two of you, he wants to have fun and make the best out of this moment. Unexpectedly you earned long and hard stripes of lick on your cunt that made you closed your eyes shut and yell at him.

Johnny is so amused seeing you so fucked up for the first time. Without a warning he pushes inside you again and fucks you with the same pace as earlier. He noticed your eyebrows furrow and your lips parted letting out sounds so sweet for him.

“I think I found you sweet spot baby” you couldn’t agree more.

“Am I fucking you good huh? Am I fucking you right?” only gasps and moans comes out from your mouth.

“You have to show me baby. You have to cum” but that’s the problem, you knew you have this weird feeling in your abdomen that you somehow can’t let go off. Finally having the strength to talk back, latching on his arms and moving you head from side to side, “I’m trying to let go baby - fuck give me time” but being the dominant that he says he is, Johnny is losing patience and you don’t know what to do. “Aren’t I fucking you good? Why aren’t you cuming yet huh?”

And just as you though the knotting in your abdomen couldn’t get worse, it did. But this time you knew what you want. “Fuck baby! More” to your surprise, he didn’t fucked you faster but he fucked you harder instead. You didn’t know it will give you the same satisfaction that you were craving for just seconds ago before he delivered hard thrusts. He felt your pussy clench and that’s enough for Johnny to make the both of you cum together.

“There you go. You like it rough huh okay I’ll do better next round” Thrust. Thrust. Thrust. You can feel his hips slapping on your skin and you finally felt that sweet release that he was asking for. You cum before him and he chased his orgasm by fucking you faster, he didn’t know that made you overstimulated. “You’re okay, sshh. You’re okay.”

He removes the condom and helped you come down your high. Massaging everything he can as a form of apology, “sorry for being rough” he kisses your shoulders and you encircled your arms around him.

“I got a boyfriend that can fuck that good?” forcing a smile trying to fight the exhaustion. Johnny blushed by your sudden compliment making his eyes small. When you pull him for a hug, his body is warm and sweaty but he surprisingly still smells good. That day you asked Johnny to keep on fucking you until you learn how to be confident on having sex with him. For you, Johnny was the prefect person to help you say goodbye to your innocence.

Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself.

He completely changed your uptight personality and introduced you to thrills and excitement. You never felt so alive after giving up that perfect image of you that you try to maintain.

He made you crave for pleasure and lust that he’s willing to give as long as you let him love you unconditionally and you give the same in return. Of course you love Johnny. He taught you that love shouldn’t always be perfect and that it could be a lot more complicated sometimes. Which is true. You always thought love should be perfect and it’s always about marriage and having kids. And you want none of that. For the first time in your life you don’t want to follow the life your parents want you to have.

-

Johnny is balls deep in your pussy, panties to the side and fucking you good on the dinner table. The man couldn’t get his hands off of your perfect figure. The room is full of moans and the sound of the table rocking back and forth from Johnny’s thrusts.

“What if we get married?” Johnny blurted out.

That doesn’t sound right. “Ah!” still catching your breath gasping and wanting more but what you heard made your head dizzy. “Johnny, I need you to get off”

“What- why? What did I do?” you got down from the table grabbing your satin shorts on the floor, wearing it again. You see Johnny putting his cock back in his boxer briefs and putting his pants on. “Is it because of what I just said? Im sorry I didn’t mean to. Lets just forget about it okay?”

“The fact that you already considered it Johnny... you will continuously think about it then someday you’re going to ask me again and again” you crossed your arms and sat across the table.

“What?” he scoffed.  “Didn’t you think that someday we will get married? Didn’t that crossed your mind! Isn’t that the goal? Isn’t that our goal!”

“Don’t shout. And no. Thats the last thing that I want. And see, thats what Ive been saying. Once you thought about the M word, you will never stop thinking about it ever again” there was a few minutes of silence, you knew you’re gonna tear up the moment you talk again. But he has to hear your part, he has the right to know what you want.

“Getting... “ your voice already cracked. “Having kids, settling down all of it. You don’t know how those things work Johnny, they’re suffocating. The weight of the responsibilities is unbearable”

“So you’re saying a life with me is something bad that will change your life completely” he wanted you to look at him but you can’t,  “So what? Were just gonna fuck like teenagers until were 40? You sound like you’re going to leave me one day.”

“I  don’t know. Its just… its not me Johnny”

“Or maybe you just don’t love me enough y/n” he pushed his hair back leaning on the table and staring you down with cold eyes, “clearly were not on the same page anymore.”

“Thats not true”

He doesn’t say a word. He gets his jacket and kissed you on your cheeks. You can’t watch him leave because it will hurt you so much. But when you heard your door close gently, suddenly you felt so weak and cold.  

The next day you asked him to go grab breakfast with you before you two go to work. Not knowing how to fix this, you still tried to reach up to him. Maybe you just got lucky that he didn’t want to pry on what happened yesterday and everything seemed fine during breakfast. From there on Johnny stopped talking about what he wants to happen in the future. Not bringing up the M word again, he’s not asking you random baby names anymore, no more IKEA window shopping for your future shared apartment. And quite frankly you miss it. Without Johnny being hopeful like that, your relationship seems dull.

You try to bring the old him back by asking him to go IKEA shopping with you. He agreed but he was quiet the whole time. He just talks whenever you asked him something.

You caught him looking at this couple who was checking furnitures together, his eyes full of envy and you can see right through him.

When you got home, you placed the bags on top of the table and went straight to the bathroom to cry. Constantly blaming yourself for not wanting the same thing as Johnny wants and for ruining the relationship you have. You grabbed a towel from the basket and you bit it to filter your screams. If you thought he didn’t hear any of your sobs and screams, you’re wrong. He’s waiting for you on the other side of the door crying his eyes out too.

Knowing that he’s outside waiting for you, you tried forming your words and forcing yourself to speak. “B-baby, I just cant provide the things you want in life anymore. You’re hurt, Im hurt. And we cant fix it because we don’t want the same things anymore. I can’t force myself to marry you and have kids when I don’t want to. And You don’t have to stop wanting and dreaming to have a family just because I don’t want to. Johnny, I think this is where it ends” You told him he could leave you and there will be no hard feelings. The breakup was somehow peaceful, no screaming and yelling like what you thought it would be. Maybe you just love each other that much but it’s still not enough.

After breaking up with Johnny, you went back home and help your sister plan her wedding. Although the two of you has very different views when it comes to marriage, you loved seeing your sister happy and excited to be married. During the wedding your sister shared the news that she’s already seven weeks pregnant and you couldn’t be more happier and the day became even more eventful because of the little angel. That day, you saw your sister’s husband tear up while she was walking down the aisle. That day, you heard your sister’s husband shout “I’m going to be a father!” You can’t help but think about how happy Johnny must be if he become someone’s husband and how happy he could be when he finally become a father.

After months and months of waiting, you finally met the little angel. An angel that changed your life. You don’t know what happened to you but meeting the little angel changed your perception in life. Yours sister’s baby was a miracle to many people, you included. Seeing how happy your sister and her husband with the baby made you realise that bringing life into this world can give you genuine happiness. You loved your niece unconditionally, showered him with every love you could possibly give and turns out you’re good with kids.

Another wedding is bound to happen, a little rushed and unplanned but you do know the couple loved each other. You knew you could possibly ran into Johnny during the wedding and you did. He looked fine as always, almost made every bridesmaid craving for him.

“All right! calling all the single ladies, it’s time for bride to throw her bouquet”

You were sure you’re sitting far from the bride not bothering to even get up and participate. You were also sure that you will never going to catch it even if you made an effort. But somehow you wanted it to come to you, near enough and catch it with both arms for Johnny. And it did. It landed on your lap. You scoffed looking at the beautiful flowers, smelling it to make it less awkward.

When the party started, everyone was almost drunk enough to care whose wedding it is. Laughter and giggles everywhere. You were alone, enjoying a whole bottle of champagne all by yourself.

“Mind if you tell who’s the lucky guy?” not turning your head back to look, that voice is familiar enough for you to know who it is.

“So happy to see you here Johnny” instead of giving him a hug you gave him a toast. Looking at each other’s fingers. Johnny checks your finger for any sign of an engagement ring and you checking his fingers for a wedding ring.

None. You answered his question to make the situation less awkward, “Just got lucky” you let out a small giggle. “The bride pretty much threw it far. And it just so happens that I’m sitting far enough for it to land on my lap” you both laughed, happy that you’re able to see each other again. Happy to have the chance to see each other’s eyes again without tears in it.

“How about you? Who’s the lucky girl?” Johnny laughs and downed the remaining alcohol from his glass.  

“Still you”

You didn’t expect him to be straightforward but you’re happy about it. That night Johnny brought you to his new apartment and you had sex on his couch, on his bedroom floor and on his bed. The next morning you were welcomed back to Johnny’s life again with all smiles, kisses and a lot of orgasms he almost ran out of condoms.

For the past couple of months you and Johnny were busy catching up with all the years you spent apart and slowly building a more established relationship. Your life couldn’t be more happier.

“Baby Im home. And Im tired” you heard him drop his keys at the table near the door, of course he made his way to the kitchen first. Feeling his arms encircled around your waist, “I’m almost done with making dinner” you gave him a kiss and he made his way to the living room. Then you heard him shout, you slowly put down the hot pot and hurried yourself to Johnny.

“Oh my gosh! Who are you?” Johnny is pointing at your sister’s baby crawling around in the living room, playing with his toys.

“Gosh you scared me. T-thats my sister’s baby. I need to babysit tonight hope you don’t mind”

“Oh! I don’t mind… Come here you little ball of sunshine, lets play” and Johnny came crawling around the living room trying to catch the energetic baby. You giggle at the sight of Johnny crawling around. He’s so tall and big.

“Johnny, I thought you’re tired…”

“Nope. Not anymore”

When you’re both in bed with the baby in between the two of you, Johnny cant stop looking after the kid, humming lullabies and patting his small legs making him sleep deeper.  

“Johnny a lot of things changed when we were apart. I started to love kids and actually looking forward on having one someday” you looked at him,  “or some…” you whispered carefully not to wake the sleeping angel. He chuckled lightly, pushing his hair back “I know” he whispered back. He pats his side of the bed, gesturing you to lay beside him. He puts a pillow next to the sleeping kid so he can still roll around the bed safely.

Johnny pulled you close to him, hovering his leg on yours. He feels warm as always. “For how long?” you asked out of curiosity. “since we got back together. You constantly talk about having our own house someday whenever we watch lifestyle network. And, you constantly ask me to fuck you raw” You were both trying not to laugh so hard cover each others mouths. Before you two close your eyes, Johnny told you he liked the idea of the two of you whispering “Whispering is good. Can’t wait to have more whispering moments with you.”

The next day your sister came in really early, Johnny was still sleeping. You told her how he took care of the baby and that he was the one who babysit the whole night playing and taking care of him. “tell Johnny I said thank you. And please, make your own baby” you can’t believe your sister just told you to have your own baby already. “Okay okay. Get out already before you wake him up. I love you, drive safe”

When you came back to the bed with Johnny, he kissed you good morning completely aware that the baby is already with your sister. “I’m gonna miss the little guy” eyes still closed he’s still whispering so you played along. “Well, we can always make our own little guy” and that woke Johnny up hovering you and showering you with wet kisses. He’s so heavy but you’d rather let him crush you than being away from him again.

“Just so you know I want three kids. Two boys one girl” he says with a big smile while drawing circles around your tummy. “You do realise thats three different educations…” he chuckled and showered your exposed tummy with kisses making you tickle and whine.

“I  know, thats why were gonna save like crazy before having them” he finally kissed you on the lips.

“I like that plan Johnny Seo you sound even more sexier. Lets be sure everything is fine and settled when they enter this world”

“And completely change our lives” he can’t stop rubbing your tummy, “I love how we’re compromising now. I never want to yell at you ever again. Not now, not ever. Definitely not in front our children”

You catch his hand and interlock your fingers with his, “I never want that to happen too baby” Johnny came closer to you, kissing you deeply. “Baby why are we whispering?”

you feel his hands creep inside your shorts, teasing your clothed clit and you let out a soft moan, biting his lips. “I don’t know... practicing to be quiet maybe?” He chuckles in between kisses.

“You going to marry me now?”

“Yes Johnny, I will”

................................................. Masterlist

[tomdiddlyumptious]

i know youre just as obsessed with the save your tears song as me, please make a fic with peter of it🙏🏾😭

lololol sorry i got this a while ago, but yes. i have an unhealthy obsession with this song. 

P.P~ Save Your Tears

warnings: none?? language??

words- 1.8k

You and peter...you and peter were special. When there was peter, there was you. No matter where you went, no matter where he went, you both were with each other, until you werent. 

“Y/n, i love you but i need this college, it means so much to me, tony wants me to go-” “tony wants you to go? He matters more then me? Peter ive been with you since forever” you said, tears pooling from your eyes, standing up in his room while he sat on his bunkbed- his cheeks and nose red as he looked at you. “So this is what its about, making tony proud? What about me peter? What about me?!” you waited for his answer, but when he didnt say anything, you just gave him an empty, sad look, a shocked look,”so this is it, huh? You go to college and you leave me and may in shitty new york, and for what?” you chuckled, “to make your” you did quote on quote “dad proud?” he became angered, staring daggers at you. “He cares about you but i clearly care more, you wouldnt even be thinking about college if it wasnt for me. Youd be stuck as spiderman still trying to make him proud!” you laughed.

“Peter, did you hear what i said, “STILL PROUD”. He doesnt even give you fuckin validation. You know what. Fuck you, have fun in missouri, i hope you make him proud” you said, stomping out and slamming the door behind you, power walking out and accidently ignoring may with your own crowded thoughts while you walked out.

But that was 2 years ago. 

You went to a college in Atlanta, peter long forgot, you and ned decided to go together. So there was a huge party in Atlanta, Harry knew about it causing Peter to know about it too. 

“Yeah theres this huge party in atlanta and i wanted to go” he said, in the kitchen of the apartment, eating chips as he looked at peter, who had his textbook in his hands and his glasses on, he looked at harry “your going out of state...just for a stupid party?” he said, his eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah i go every year,” “and your telling me this….for?”

“I want you to come with me” harry smiled, walking over and hopping on the couch while peter set his text book on the coffee table “i dont think so” he said, “oh come on! The most baddest chicks are their peter! And you need to get over y/n-” “shut up, harry” peter looked at him with a clenched jaw, your name was his kryptonite, making him weak in his stomach and his knees woozy as if they were gonna fall out. “Look, your doing it again” harry called him out. “Ive dated her for over 7 years harry, what am i supposed to do, toss her in the trash?” “Yes actually” he shrugged, making peter grumble before taking off his glasses and setting them down. “i’ll think about it” “i’ll pack your bag” harry did a quick grin at him before standing up and tossing the chips at peters chest. 

So there they are, moving into another apartment for three days, only taking out a few pairs of clothes and leaving it on the bed. “Party is tomorrow, we need drinks and stuff” “if its a huge party what do we need to buy stuff for?” peter asked, harry said, “You're too innocent” before walking off. 

“Ned! I do not need a plus one!” “it wont be a plus one it’ll be a plus two!” “im not going in there as a throuple” you turned to him, he didnt want you to look lonely inside of the party, so why not just go on an open date with betty and him? Because it weird, or thats atleast what you thought. You picked out your dress, your body has changed since senior year, making your curves more evident, which you didnt mind, it was nice. The dress was quite tight in the right places, making you feel confident, you asked betty how it looked, she said if she was a lesbian shed try to dig, which was unusual for someone like her to say that, but youd take it. “Are you sure, y/n?” he asked, genuinely, you turned to him and sincerely nodded. “Yes, thank you” 

And so there it was, harry and peter went to buy the drinks, two bottles of each just for home, which harry made peter try, peter wasnt pleasant but harry said hed need it. 

So there the party was, harry helping peter pick something out, making sure it wasnt too “nerdy” which ended up in harry having to give peter something to wear, an oversized orange shirt and jeans, a black hat backwards and some of peters normal shoes, vans. “Im proud of my creation” harry said while they both looked in the mirror, peter sighed in disgust “i hate you” “love you too bud” 

You and ned got ready, helping him out with which colognes he should use, you made him help you out with the makeup, it was a simple black dress but there was no harm in trying to pop it out, “red” “red? Are you sure? Does it bring out my skin??” you said, he nodded “wear it! And hurry! We have to pick up betty!”

It was 9 o’clock, the party already started as you and your best friends pushed past people to get something to drink, but one drink turned into two, and then to three, and then continuing on. Ned ended up with red lipstick and lip marks all over his face and a tie around his eyes, everyone cheering him on when he was in a drinking competition with the famous gregory, of course ned won, making the boys chant his ned “ned ned ned ned!” and you were in the front row with betty, a red cup in your hand and everyone letting out a deep “wooooo!” and whistles when ned stuck his arms out in the air before taking the tie off, you laughed as the party stopped the challenges and it was dancing time, so betty pulled you to the dance floor, you let out an “ahhh!” as in you didnt wanna dance but she gave you a stern look “loosen up” she smiled, dancing around and her grin widened when you started to slowly loosen up, drinking the forbidden juice in your cup before you threw it wherever.

Peter and harry finally arrived, drinks in hand as he looked around, “there really is hot chicks” peter said making harry laugh hysterically before grabbing a cup for peter. “Just make sure you leave before i do” “yuck” harry passed the cup to peter, and he took a sip, his throat burning before he looked at harry “dont give up, the party has just started! I have to use the bathroom” harry walked off, peter looked around at the different sections, he could sit on the couch but there was people making out there, he could join some of the shot gunning but it was clear they were already thirty drinks in, which left him to the dance floor. 

Dancing in the crowded hall, stood you, as before, his stomach turned and his knees felt woozy as his mouth slightly opened, it was really you. Your hips moving loosely with a huge smile on your face, you looked so much more happier without him, he started to feel bad, his mind coming to memories before you caught him looking at you, making your movements falter. Your mouth open with shock, a single tear coming down your face before he called out your name, you ignored him walking the other way. “Dammit!” he said, placing down the cup he didnt need before pushing past people, he could see the back of your head, he groaned when a girl pushed him “watch where your going dumbass!” she said, peter ignored her and came upstairs still following you, now into an empty hallway “Y/N!- Y/N- i know you can hear me theres literally nobody else in this fucking hallway!” he said, his walking stopped as yours did to, you looked back at him, turning to him. “Please” you made eye contact with him, your face empty as no words came out of your mouth, you walked to him, a hopeful smile on his face, until you walked passed him, your shoulder thumping against his that made him fall, he looked back at you and furrowed his eyebrows, his heart shattered in pieces as he swore he heard it break like glass, it was already cracked. 

You could have asked him why he broke your heart

You could've told him that you fell apart

But you walked past him like he wasn't there

And just pretended like you didn't care.

He ran away from you and now it was your turn, you told yourself not to cry, to save your tears for another day, or for another, he wasnt worth it, at least thats what you told yourself. He watched as you disappeared, sadness engulfing him as he sat against the wall. “Fuck” he ran his hands through his hair before he looked your direction again, tears threatning to roll down his cheeks as he couldnt believe that happened, but it was his fault, and once he noticed that, he broke down in tears.

he made you think that he would always stay

He said some things that he should've never said

 He broke your heart like someone did to his, 

And now you won't love him for a second time.

He didnt know it would make you cry when he ran away, he didnt even know why he ran away. He wanted to chase after you, for you to take him back because this time he really wanted to stay, two years, much too late. He didnt deserve you, you deserved better, not someone who left you for someone he didnt even talk to anymore, tony. 

“Save your tears, y/n” you told yourself, but you couldn't take it, you ran to your car and opened the door, getting in the driver's seat you cried, slamming the door shut as your back hunched and you hit the hunk, kicking and hitting the steering wheel until you couldn't anymore, tears ruining your makeup as you looked at yourself through the rear view, your hair a mess, your eyeliner ruined, you, ruined. you couldn't save your tears, you couldn't save them for another day, or another. Peter, the love of your life, ran away, and you cant love him again, because, he broke you.

[seokjinsdisciple]

Enemy

johnny x reader (literally all smut, i dont know what to say)

you absolutely, 100% loathe johnny suh. what happens when you find yourself stuck in an elevator with him?

I FINALLY WROTE PART TWO

UNEDITED

word count: 3k (johnny has me messed up this comeback, ok?)

warnings: language, thigh-riding, fingering, elevator sex, degradation, choking, hair-pulling, overuse of the word kitten, johnny eats his cum from you, theres probably more because suddenly im a whore for johnny, this is just a cesspool ok

You were rushing back home, you had forgotten your textbook for your biology class, and your professor would be using problems from it all lecture. You didn’t want to have to deal with her wrath by not bringing it with you. So here you were, sprinting through the streets in the hot summer air, with the sun beating down on you as you headed towards your apartment. You caught your breath as you strolled into the air-conditioned lobby, groaning as the elevator doors started to close. You love your apartment, you really did, but the elevator was so slow, and someone was moving in today, making it almost impossible to catch. And you didn’t want to have to take the stairs up to your 12th-floor apartment. 

“Please hold the elevator,” you yelled as you ran, slipping inside just before the doors closed. As you turned to press your floor, you noticed who you were sharing an elevator with. To be more specific, you noticed who you were sharing the elevator with who was also holding a moving box. Johnny Suh stood before you. Annoying, attractive Johnny Suh. 

Johnny just stared at you, mischief in his eyes and he rested the box he was holding on his hip and gave a little wave in your direction. 

“Are you following me or something, Suh?” you asked, groaning as you realized the 11th-floor button was already lit up. 

“In your dreams, nerd,” he laughed, leaning his head back against the elevator wall. You stood as far away from him as you could, putting in your headphones and praying that he would leave you alone. You and Johnny were self-proclaimed enemies. He was in your science class the very first semester of your freshman year, and when you were assigned together for a group project, your feelings were set in stone. Not only did he spend the whole time bothering you, but he ended up not doing any work, leaving you to finish the project by yourself. After that, it seemed like he followed you around, in fact, this was the first semester since you started college that you didn't have a single class together. Yet here he was, moving into your apartment building and most likely on your floor. 

You would be less annoyed by him if you didn’t find him as attractive as you did. He bothers you all of the time, but you still had your fair share of angry sex wet dreams that he was the star of. You shook those thoughts from your mind as you glanced at Johnny, he was smirking at you, something you just rolled your eyes at. 

“What’s got you all hot and bothered?” he asked, setting down the box and slipping his hands in his pockets. You glanced at the floor count of the elevator, groaning as you realized you were only on floor four. 

“I hate these elevators,” you mumbled, ignoring the fact that Johnny was getting closer to where you stood. 

“You’re blushing pretty hard, nerd. Whatcha thinking about?” he grinned at you, lowering his face so that he was staring at your profile. You refused to turn to look at him. Johnny would never fail to get on your nerves, it's as if he had a gift for it. You were just praying, hoping that this whole elevator ride would be over soon. At that moment, the elevator shook, dropping a little bit and, with a loud screech, jerking to a stop. 

Johnny’s body pushed you into the wall, the force of the stop causing you both to stumble. He quickly got off of you, curse words falling from his lips as the lights in the elevator flickered. 

“Why?” you groaned, your voice rising as the lights came back on, “fuck, Johnny, what the hell do we do?”

“I don't know! You are supposed to be the smart one!!” he ran his hands through his hair in frustration, his voice clearly showing how freaked out he was. 

“God, this is probably because you’ve been using the elevators all day to move-in.”

“What was I supposed to do? Carry my couch up 11 flights of stairs by myself?” Johnny hissed back, kicking the box near his feet. 

“Why are you even moving in anyways, get kicked out of your frat house?” You rolled your eyes, you wouldn’t be stuck in this elevator if it wasn't for him. 

“You don’t know a single thing about me nerd, so I suggest you shut up,” Johnny snarled, sitting on the opposite side of the elevator. You followed his lead, sitting against the wall across from him. Neither one of you looking at the other. 

You desperately checked your phone, letting out another sigh as no service flashed at the top of your screen. 

“Check your phone to see if you have service,” you demanded, watching hopefully as Johnny pulled his phone out, pressing the power button once. 

“It’s dead,” he said, letting his head fall back onto the wall with a thud. 

Twenty minutes after the alarm button on the elevator was pressed you feel the first bead of sweat form on your forehead. You took a deep breath in, and tried your best to ignore the growing temperature of the room. You took a quick glance at Johnny, he was clearly feeling the heat too. 

“Is it getting hotter?” you asked, fanning yourself with a folder you had in your backpack. 

“The air conditioning must’ve broken too,” Johnny said, meeting your eyes for a second before muttering, “I can’t stand this anymore.”

Your eyes bulged out of their sockets as he threw his shirt off, smirking at your expression and quirking his eyebrow.

Your eyes were drawn immediately to his sculpted abs, his chest somewhat sweaty but just the perfect amount. You coughed a little, trying to cover up your blatant staring but Johnny just laughed at you, spreading his legs and giving you a better view. 

“Fuck off, Johnny,” you rolled your eyes, looking away from his toned stomach. 

“Please, nerd, the least I can do is give you a free show,” he chuckled, running his hand through his slightly sweaty hair, “You seem to be enjoying it anyway, so why should I stop?”

“I only looked because you are sweating and smell gross,” you replied easily, looking away before your eyes dropped any further. 

“Whatever you have to convince yourself of,” Johnny winked at you, silence filling the elevator again. 

If you thought it was hot before, it was exponentially hotter now. Your mind not able to get the image of Johnny’s perfectly sculpted body and how his muscles would look as he... enough. You shook those thoughts from your head, the stickiness growing between your thighs despite your efforts to calm down. 

It was like Johnny knew what he was doing to you. He kept biting his lips, running his hand through his hair, and worst of all he turned his groans into moans. You had every desire to cover your ears and pray to God for forgiveness. But it was too late. Your thoughts had already descended into a place that you couldn’t recover from without… taking care of some things. 

You tried to keep cool, but your rising body temperature is due more to a handsome young man than the broken ac. It was becoming too much for you to bear, the heat and tension filling the elevator finally sending you over the edge. 

“Fuck it,” you muttered, throwing your shirt off and practically moaning as cool air hit your tummy. 

You glanced at Johnny, his gaze firmly set on your black lace bra, his tongue poking out as he readjusted himself on the floor. 

“Want a free show?” you asked, smirk mimicking his own when he had asked a similar question earlier. 

“Are you trying to seduce me now, nerd?” Johnny’s voice practically growled, his voice now gravelly and his eyes burning into the side of your head. 

“I don’t think it would take much of an effort,” you smirked, meeting his darkening eyes. 

“Oh really?” he asked, an eyebrow rising at your statement, “I don’t think I’d have to work that hard either.”

You just scoffed at his statement, more heat filling your body as you thought about what his words could mean. 

“What makes you think I’d be that easy, hm?” You shot back, gulping as Johnny let out a laugh. 

“Because I can see the wetness through your shorts love,” he winked, you body immediately flushing hotter, “gray looks good on you.”

“Shut up,” you snapped, moving your legs so you were covered, “It’s not like I can’t see the tent in your shorts.”

“Then come take care of it for me?” Johnny asked, spreading his legs as an invitation. 

“W-what?” you questioned, your heart beating much faster than it had been a moment beforehand. 

“Oh don’t get shy on me now, kitten,” Johnny smirked, “you’ve been so outspoken and such a little brat today. No need to become speechless now.”

“Ok, ha. Ha. Very funny Johnny,” you rolled your eyes, “jokes over. You can quit messing with me.”

Johnny just tsked at this, his voice sending an immediate jolt to your core,“It’s too bad, kitten, I really could’ve helped you with your little problem.”

You both sat in silence for a minute or two, the urge to touch yourself growing the more you thought about the words Johnny had spoken to you only a minute before. You fidgeted in your spot, avoiding Johnny’s gaze and praying that someone, anyone would open those elevator doors so you could go home and pass out against your vibrator. Your fingers played with the hem of your shorts, a moan threatening to spill from your mouth at even the slightest touch.

“Fuck,” Johnny whispered, grabbing your hand in his own and pulling you onto his lap, “If you wanna cum, ride my thigh.”

You squirmed on his lap, your first instinct to slap him and crawl back to your side of the elevator, but your slight movement was just enough friction for you self control to snap. You buried your head into his shoulder as you situated yourself against his thigh, your hips gently rolling against his flesh. His hands found their way onto your hips, guiding you back and forth to increase your pace. You whined against his collarbone, the pleasure exactly the kind of relief that you needed. 

“I knew you could be good, kitten,” Johnny praised, forcing your hips down further and tensing his thigh, a full-blown moan leaving your mouth then. 

“Sh-shut up,” you moaned, “No talking.”

Johnny landed a swift slap on your ass then, the sting still felt through your shorts, “You don’t make the rules,” he growled, stopping your hips and shoving your shorts and underwear down. He slipped a finger between your folds, a groan leaving his mouth as he stared at your core. He met your eyes, his face turning from horny to serious. 

“Do you want to do this?” He whispered, his eyes not leaving yours for a second. 

“God, please Johnny. If you don’t fuck me right now, we really are going to become enemies,” you begged, hands finding their way to the waistband of his shorts and pulling them down. Johnny took no more than a second to snap back into his previous persona, a growl leaving his throat as he grabbed both of your hands with one of his. 

“Do you really think you deserve my cock?” He asked, “You’ve been such a little brat, why should I help you, hm?”

“Johnny please,” you begged, wriggling in his grasp, your hips trying to find some sort of friction. 

“Even now you are just a needy little slut, trying to get off,” he whispered, a groan leaving your lips as another slap landed on your ass, “Poor little kitten, can’t come on her own, needs someone's help.”

You whined as Johnny flipped you over gently, balling up his shirt and using it as a pillow for your head.  Then he kissed you, and not surprisingly to you, he was a really good kisser. His passion and desire were clear as he kissed you, making the locking of your lips a good kind of messy. 

He dipped his fingers into your heat as he kissed you, stretching your lips apart so that you would adjust to him more easily. He quieted your moans with his mouth, pulling away briefly to press a kiss to your temple and shimmy his shorts off. 

Johnny cupped your face once again staring into your eyes and asking a silent question. You nodded in response but he just tucked a piece of your hair behind your ears and said, “I need words, please.”

“Johnny please, I want this,” you spoke quietly, and that was enough for him to press another kiss on your lips and sink himself into you. You both groaned at the feeling, pleasure immediately building as he bottomed out. 

Johnny’s hand caressed down your face until it made its way around your throat. Johnny’s eyes flickered to yours in order to sense any sort of discomfort, but he practically growled as your eyes rolled back. He tightened his grip slightly, sending just the right amount of pleasure through you. 

“I always knew you were a slut, like when your hole is filled and you can’t breathe, hm?”

You nodded, a whine tearing from your throat as he reached his other hand in between your bodies and made contact with your bud. His thrusts were deep, and you swear the elevator was shaking, but you didn’t care. Pleasure surrounded you, Johnny’s hand wrapped around your throat couldn’t even stop the moans from leaving your mouth. 

The coil in your belly was tightening, and as Johnny rubbed at your clit and hit spots within you that no one had ever hit, you came. Your whole body spasming and your eyes rolling back into your head. Johnny moved his hands up and down your sides, soothing you as he continued to thrust. When he pulled out of you, a whine tore through your throat, not ready to let go of the fullness that his cock provided. 

“Don’t worry kitten, I’m not done with you yet,” he smirked, holding out a hand in order to help you move around, “Hands and knees, now.”

You complied easily, used to taking orders from him now and wanting him to fill you up again. You let him readjust you, and when he pushed himself inside you couldn’t help but tighten around him. Johnny cursed, gripping your hips tightly and thrusting harshly to try and get you to relax. When you did, he landed a sharp smack on your ass, a moan leaving your lips before you could stop it. 

“I never gave you permission to come kitten,” Johnny said, his breath uneven but his trusts staying strong. He grabbed a handful of your hair pulling it just hard enough to send another bolt of pleasure through you. His hand hit you again, your eyes fluttering shut at the pleasure. 

“So tight, kitten,” he grunted, his hips rocking into yours at a monstrous pace, “like being used?”

“Y-yes,” you moaned, too caught up in the pleasure to think about who you were saying that to.

His pace was getting more erratic, and his grunts were becoming louder when he reached his hand around you and attached it again to your sensitive bud. 

“Cum, YN,” he demanded, his hand making up for the inconsistent rocking of his hips. You came easily, not realizing you were as close as you were. With your heat tightening into a vice grip around Johnny’s length, he came. The twitch of his cock inside you causing another spasm around him. He hissed, pressing a light kiss to your shoulder as he pulled out. 

“You ok?” He asked, helping you sit on your bum and rubbing your sore knees, gently. You closed your eyes for a moment, trying to even out your breathing, and that's when he struck. 

You felt his tongue lapping at your sensitive core, your eyes shooting open at the sudden pleasure. 

“Johnny what are you-” You started, but a long swipe of his tongue made you shut up. 

“I’m cleaning up,” he added, the mischievous grin that he always wore was back on his face. He buried himself back into your core, spreading your lips with his fingers and licking into your heat. 

None of the people you had ever been with had made you cum twice, but here you were building up into a third high. This one seemed to be more due to the fact that Johnny was eating his own cum from inside you. A thought that made your heat pulse. As Johnny licked, he rubbed your extremely sensitive clit with his index finger. He was gentle and attentive to anything he did that seemed to be too much for you. He resumed his focus on your clit after intertwining his hand with your own, allowing you to squeeze it as you came once again on his tongue. He licked you through your orgasm, your mind completely blanking as the pleasure overtook you. When you were done, he pulled you onto his lap, pressing a kiss to your nose and helping you fix your hair. He helped you pull your clothes back on, and when the door to the elevator was pried open, he hid you from the view of the whistling men who had come to save you. Johnny had never been so sweet with you, and as he helped you inside your apartment and into your bed, only one thought was running through your head. 

Maybe you didn’t mind having Johnny Suh as your new next-door neighbor at all.

[vegetalass]

If you come back to this, would you consider doing hcs for the rdr2 boys coping with bad breakups? 👀🙈💖👉👈😳

I love your stuff btw! Hope the hiatus is going well and you're having fun being absorbed into new fandom stuff <3

JSKajhdhajfskhjdkajsh AHHHHHHHHHHH YOU ARE TOO SWEET WTF🥺🥺So I just went ahead and wrote this request for you LOOOOOL😎💘😳🤠

even tho I would still say I’m on hiatus.... I was just thinking about Mister Arthur Morgan today and how much i want to sit on his lap and hug him and kiss his cheeks and hold his face against my chest.... So I figure this is as good a time as any to write some stuff for rdr2...

Plus... I really am happy about the fact that people like my work enough to still send me asks!!! I miss the rdr2 fandom a lot tbh because as I’m sure you all have been know... The bnha fandom is a little..... wack tbh..... But regardless, I am having as much fun as i possibly can under the circumstances!!! Theres a lot of good content there... 

and just in case u like bnha... you can actually find me at @ihatebnha if you want to read any of my current BNHA stuff (tho im sorta taking a break there too temporarily). Either way, even if you don’t, i appreciate u all for sticking with me and I MISS U GUYS so i hope this does u all some justice!

anyway... i hope this is what you were looking for because I LOVE UUUUUU!! ENJOY💚🧡❤️

-

Arthur

First of all………. If you break up with Arthur I personally will come beat you up

Secondly….

Honestly, he probably just goes completely numb

He doesn’t have the emotional stability or strength to handle unpacking how or why it’s happening

You ask to break up with him and his soul leaves his body and he’s just “Ok.🙂Whatever you think is best, baby.”

And that’s the end of it. Won’t even let you explain.

This means don’t prank him by pretending to break up with him either because you’ll accidentally kill him

Like he genuinely probably thinks that he deserves whatever it is that made you want to break up with him and that there’s really nothing he can do to feel better about it

Even if was just something like, long distance problems or needing a break

This also hurts so badly because I feel like… getting to the point where Arthur even wants to date you takes FOREVER… He really really needs to trust and love the person who he’s with…

And so to see them leave would just break his heart up into pieces and he wouldn’t be able to handle that all over again

He just… becomes a ghost

Anyone from the gang even mentions it or asks how he is and he just tells them he’s fine and doesn’t need to talk about it

Even if he really is aching deep down… He just can’t bring himself to talk about it because it still doesn’t make any sense to him

And honestly, he just doesn’t want things to hurt any more than they already do by acknowledging them or facing them head on

So he just submits to it all being his fault, it was the right thing to do, that you’re happier without him, etc. and permanently shuts himself off

If you left him, that would be the absolute final straw and he would just throw himself into his work and never look back

And honestly wouldn’t even notice if someone else was making moves on you, that’s how out of it he is.

You wouldn’t even notice something was wrong unless you TRULY knew Arthur

He’s a tough cookie

John

John is the guy who acts like he’s fine if anyone sees him but cries 24/7 when he’s alone

If anyone asks him about it he’s like “I don’t care, it’s fine and I respect their decision… I’m a man, not a baby.”

But the truth is…. Sir… You ARE baby

Honestly…. He’s just saying all that so people don’t really know how much he’s hurting or think he’s weak and try to help

And in a modern setting, Abigail, Arthur, Hosea, anyone really, can’t go to his apartment because he’s lost all motivation to take care of himself

Dishes piled up, laundry everywhere, he’s been wearing the same pajamas for a week, his trash is full of microwave meal packages… It’s just so fucking bad

Single Man Shit

Probably goes through bouts of rage too

Was he not good enough? Did you think you weren’t good enough? Was it the fact that he has Abigail and Jack? Is he too ugly for someone pretty like you?  

It’s in these moments that he starts throwing stuff around and kicking chairs and whatnot

I imagine it’s all pretty nonviolent but he still just wants to make a mess to release all that pent up frustration

But he always just ends up on the floor or in bed crying again because he really doesn’t understand what went wrong since he was trying so hard to be a good partner

He wanted to be good for you :(

At least to make up for what he did to Abigail

Probably a couple months after the breakup he starts feeling better…

Picks his laundry up and does the dishes and starts to open up to the gang again

He’s definitely still sad when he thinks about it all… But he knows he’ll get over it as long as you seem happy from afar

If any of the other boys from camp try to make a move on you, he does his best to ignore it… Knowing it’s not his place to speak for you anymore, even if seeing you with someone else does make him sad

And he probably takes some extra time to spend with Abigail and Jack, too

There’s really no one like your family (even if they’re chosen) to make you feel better in situations like this

(Especially since they went through the same thing as him BY him)

Karma’s a bitch, lol

Charles

Charles... My love….. My baby…….

He takes a while to fall apart because honestly, he’s just so confused

He definitely does not recover quickly, but of course, appears to function kind of normally

If anything, he just gets more quiet and distant than before, simply because he needs a lot of time and space to think about everything

And because looking at you hurts so badly

When you mention breaking up, he probably just stands up and walks away

And if you chase after him trying to explain, he’ll tell you that you don’t need to justify yourself, and that he just needs to be alone

However, deep down, he’s gutted and really just needs the space to process what you said and then calm down

He doesn’t want to face the gang, and possibly you, again, crying, hence why he doesn’t come back for a while, but he knows that he can’t just run away from everything

He never thought that you’d be capable of hurting him in the way that you did

And he wonders what the final straw that pushed you over the edge was

He definitely saw you staying together for a long time, and had a lot of ideas for your future, so the breakup was especially surprising and devastating for that reason alone

And he would probably never want to speak to you again

Not really because he hated you, but because it would be too emotional for him to be around you knowing you didn’t feel the same as him

And even though he’s okay with emotions, the gang just isn’t exactly the right space for him to deal with them

Though he probably eventually talks about it with Arthur after a couple months, once he finds another normal, and bonds with him over the shared experience

He would never be able to ask you this, but he wonders if the reason you left him was for the same reasons he’s shunned in society

I think that would hurt him the most… if you didn’t want to be seen with him in public

Even though he knows that it’s unlikely, since he didn’t want to hear your reasons for leaving, it’s something that he thinks about

Even if it would hurt him to see you with someone else, he wouldn’t do anything about it

And as always, he’d just stay quiet, watching

Micah

Micah blames you

Everything is your fault. Everything.

Oh, you want to break up with him? When he’s been so nice to you? So good? He’d literally do anything for you, and you’re not happy with that? You’re such an ungrateful bitch! Fuck you! He never even wanted to date you in the first place, so it’s your fault for making him love you. Sorry he tried soooo hard.  

Any semblance of sadness he feels about losing you turns to rage so quickly since he just really cannot fathom why you’d leave him

Genuinely thinks he’s the best boyfriend you’ve ever had and ever will

SIR…????

Despite his anger, he probably is sad deep down… He just doesn’t really recognize it as sadness in the first place

His chest aches when he thinks about you? His eyes sting and burn when he looks at you? His stomach hurts at any and every thought of you?

You’re just an ugly witch who wants him dead.

He has never felt any of these things before, and frankly, he hates feeling like this.

And absolutely refuses to admit to himself that maybe… MAYBE… he just misses you and wants you back…

Honestly though, you will never get word nor wind of this, and before long, he really just does start to hate you.

If you weren’t in the gang, and were ever in a situation where you saw him again, he’d try to make your life a hell.

He’d tease you in front of whoever you were with, talking about how he’s probably the best fuck you’d ever have and that “if you still wanted to fuck him,” he “wouldn’t blame you…” and might even think about it going at it on more time

In a modern setting, he’s definitely a hate fucking type of ex

And if he ever saw you with a new boy, he would probably try to lay some hands on them for even thinking about touching you

AND STILL doesn’t realize that this means he still loves you… But whatever

If you break up with him, guaranteed you’re probably never getting back together

Dutch

Dutch is a tough one… I feel like it really depends on how long you’ve been together, the reason why you want to breakup, and how much value he has for the you and relationship itself

I think he’d be more upset about a long term relationship ending than anything and he’d definitely try to argue with you about any of the problems you bring up

He definitely hits you with the, “you should’ve known what you were getting into,” which, honestly, is a pretty fair point

He doesn’t actually want you to leave him, though… He just doesn’t really want to change

Which is why the whole thing ends up being so T O X I C

But if he realizes that you are actually serious about breaking up, he isn’t above saying that he’ll put the work into fixing everything

Though that’s kind of a lie, since he’s mostly just saying it to get you to stay

If the argument gets too intense, he’ll let you walk away

But only because he’s going to brainstorm about how to get you back

I’m sure this is a given, but none of the other boys at camp are allowed to even think about getting close to you

It wasn’t so bad when you and Dutch were still together, but if he wants you back, everyone is a threat

Arthur and John are given direct orders to not even comfort you… And Dutch even tries to get Miss Grimshaw to be mean to you

At least so he can swoop in and save you… Thinking that you’ll run right back into his arms if no one except him is nice to you

Because that’s where you belong

If he doesn’t manage to succeed in winning you back, the moment he realizes that everything is over, he will 100% start ignoring you

And don’t put it past him to try show off the fact that he’s found someone new to fuck

Honestly, since he’s the leader, at this point, he’d probably just be looking for a good way to get rid of you

Nothing violent, just find a little brothel he can pop you in when the gang’s about to leave some random town

Seems like a good idea to him… Since if he’s not special, no one is.

Same reason why, if you cheat on him, you will never see the whites of his eyes again

Much less anyone from the gang

Kieran

To give Kieran some credit... He’s probably the most in touch with his emotions

He doesn’t respond very well to the breakup, just says okay and lets you walk away, but he’s not above accepting the truth and just crying about it for a while

First and foremost, you need to be happy, even if it means without him

Part of him wants to beg for you to stay so badly… Hold onto the bottom of your shirt and cry… But I know that he probably thinks he doesn’t deserve to and would be able to stop himself

Obviously, you know better than him about everything so why would you be wrong about breaking up?

His work definitely lags and he ends up spending more time with the animals than anyone else, but he’s okay at holding himself together

No one would even know he’s still suffering unless they talked to him about it

Which they don’t, really, and honestly he’s sort of glad, because it gives him a lot of time to think about everything

Which is why, even months after the breakup, if he hasn’t found someone new, he still thinks about what it would be like if you stayed

Daydreams about cuddling with you, about dancing with you, about brushing the horses with you, starting a family, everything…

He wishes it were his so badly

And so seeing you with another boy, especially if it were someone else at camp, would absolutely kill him

And yet, he’d still manage to keep it all to himself. Nothing but his greedy eyes left

Self esteem gone forever… He’d take you back in a heartbeat

Doesn’t help that the poor baby definitely gets clowned by Dutch and Micah about not being able to keep “a good fuck” around

It really hurts… But in the end, he knows they’re right  

Javier

Javier probably gets over everything the quickest out of all of the boys.

I just see him as having the most romantic experience out of all of them, so he understands how relationships (and breakups) work

His logic is, why would he want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with him?

Which makes getting over you faster than normal

Especially since, regardless of why you wanted to leave, he’s going to respect your wishes

Definitely a little peeved at first though because he thought things were fine between the two of you

He’s just not going to bother trying to get you to stay

Especially since he knows that he can be kind of flirty with people even when he’s with you

That being said, if he sees any of the other boys at camp trying to get with you, he’s going to be BIG MAD

First of all, he was there first, so they should know better than to touch someone else’s things

And second of all, it would just feels like they’re showing off the fact that you left him, rather than the other way around

But honestly, he probably wouldn’t care if you found a stranger to mess with. It’s not like they know your relationship history, and honestly, he knows it wouldn’t be fair if he were ever to find someone else he likes.

So he’s fine watching you run around

It’s only ever late at night, if it’s been a while since you’ve spoken to him, or he’s feeling lonely, that he thinks about what things would be like if you were still with him

He wonders what really made you leave, and if you were honest with him during the relationship

Overall, he’d be okay, but would definitely still be down to fuck if you ever wanted! You may not want to be with each other anymore, but it doesn’t change the fact you guys had some bomb ass sex

Sean

Sean is another boy who’s going to be a bit more angry than sad

That being said, he’s no where near as bad as Micah and knows that the anger comes from the sadness

He’s just extremely frustrated that things didn’t work out, and resents the fact that you didn’t even want to try and fix things with him

It’s not like he really blames you for that… But he wishes that he could

Especially since throughout it all, even now, he doesn’t actually hate you, and still wishes that you would come back

He’s knows his personality can be a little overwhelming, but he would’ve been willing to change if it made you happy!

But honestly, since he doesn’t need to anymore, everything about him just gets a bit… Worse

Constantly making a show of showing off for the other girls at camp, always trying to flirt with the girls at the saloon, talking the boys’ heads off about anything and everything…

Just to distract himself and prove that he’s doing fine… That you didn’t hurt him at all, and he doesn’t need you

But even he’s not all that convinced

If any of the other boys at camp start messing around with you, he’ll definitely start a fight with them, feeling like were just doing it to piss him off

He’d lose, though, and would end up just going to bed and crying.

If he saw you flirting with a stranger, he’d be equally as mad, but he probably wouldn’t do anything other than get super drunk in front of you to ruin the mood

Eventually he starts feeling more like himself, and it definitely helps if you don’t treat him weirdly, but he finds that he does still think of you when he sees cute married girls or children, wondering what he would’ve had if things didn’t go wrong.

Especially since he also gets teased by the gang for not being able to hold it down… Despite his constant talk