#im gonna buy fried chicken for night snack

[kaiserouo]

preparation

[thedappleddragon]

hooooo my fucking god I don't know why but recently my anxiety/sence of dread has SKYROCKETED in the last 3 days, I haven't been sleeping great and last night I had an anxiety dream about manning the register at work. idk I guess today was fine but im so fucking overstimulated I guess?? I seriously just dont fuking know. but anyway here’s a summary of some days that I may or may not remember. putting it under the cut

Wednesday I was exited to work, they didn’t need me, I hung out with my friends at their outdoor band concert and had boba and it got super cold out

Thursday I went with my dad to drop off a car, then we had breakfast together at a little restaurant I had never been to before. He told me about his childhood n stuff. Then I went to work and priced things outside and felt good about helping some people buy plants even tho I didn’t know exactly what I was doing and ended up handing them off to Becky anyway. Got off work, came home, hung out waiting to be able to go visit my friend but she took a while so dad and I made the snack he had a lot as a kid which was just handmade chocolate frosting on graham crackers. Eventually my friend got home so I grabbed one of those graham crackers in some Tupperware and some other stuff and headed out. It was a longer drive than I was expecting but eh whatever, I got there no problem with a bunch of dad’s shit in the back of the car. We had awkward hellos in her apartment and I pet her fat ass cat until she suggested we go thrifting and oh my god I had never wanted to go thrifting more in my life than right then. I had one of those moments where I realized oh I’m an adult who can go out and just DO things :D so we walked around and gossiped in goodwil and had a great time until they closed, whereupon steph frantically looked for anything that was open near us while I drove around. We settled on going to a little park nearby, where we climbed on the tube with holes on it and swung on the swings. Then we walked around a dense tree/brush like and into the middle of a field, having our main character moments as we walked to the top of a hill with a cross on it. I took a picture of the sunset and a selfie with both of us before we walked back through the field and drove back to her apartment. I gave her 2 tiny flower jars and she let me borrow her container of earring hardware and a bunch of different tiny things to make into earrings. I had a great time and I’d love to hang out again, maybe when everything isn’t closed lmao. We joked a lot about understanding why people do drugs lmao since there’s nothing else to do! everything’s closed!! Also some joke flirting mixed in for flavor. We have an excuse to hang out again so I can return her earring supplies and she can return my Tupperware lol. I thought my phone was going to die on the way home before I realized there was a charging cord in the car! Nice. Got home, watched my friend stream plasmaphobia for a bit while I finished a birthday gift, and hung out and slept when she quit streaming. 

Friend’s birthday party day!! Also dad moving day!! The first task of the day was to drive with my dad down to the nearest uhaul to pick up a big ol’ truck, and follow him home in the car while he lead the way in the truck. Then we brought his car full of shit to the apartment, got his key and paid his first month, and looked through everything to do inspection. Tbh it’s a pretty nice apartment, I’d love to spend some time there once it’s a bit more furnished. My favorite part is a Harry Potter style hidey hole closet that’s meant for storage, but it’s the perfect size for a secluded hangout spot for me. I’ll totally let him use it for storage if he wants, I just like sitting in there. I joked that I would let Emily hang out in the spare bedroom and I could get the tiny room. But we spent time cleaning and looking around and bringing in boxes before dad sent me to pick up lunch, my sister, and another car load of boxes. I left to do all 3 and came back with Mcallisters, and we all sat on the floor and ate together. A very nice way to break in a new apartment. We brought in boxes and dad sent us on a quest to pick up a car part and drop it off where the car we dropped off the day before. We got there just fine, but getting to the second location was a nightmare because of all my wrong turns and u turns and no left turns, it was awful. I mean we got there eventually but still. By then it was time for me to get home so I could wash my hair and get ready for the party!! I got everything ready, but my sister wouldn’t be home with the car on time, so I just took my mom’s van. I was on time for once!! But in exchange I didn’t realize I had forgotten Cassidy’s gift until I was like 3 minutes away. But also I found driving my moms van very easy compared to last time I tried to drive it, and I think I’m a much more confident driver now :) but I was one of the first to arrive, accidentally twinned with cass, waited for everyone to show up, met her new dog, and then we all packed up the picnic basket and walked to the top of a hill to have our little sandwiches and play cards against humanity. On the walk there we passed by a park where little kids were asking why we were all dressed up if it wasn’t Halloween, so I shouted at them that it was her birthday and handed them the branch I was carrying. We played CAH on the hill and ate little sandwiches and meatballs and drank sparkling juice and had a lovely time, and when we were done, we walked back to her house where there was pizza and we all changed out of our formal wear. My bra was sewed into my dress with 6 stitches, so I grabbed some scissors and flashed my friend’s cat as I cut my bra free of the dress because I forgot to bring an extra. I changed into my ghostbusters shirt and snake onesie and joined everyone outside for pizza and lots and lots of stories and ice cream cake and gossip and quiplash and balloons and gifts and CAH and friends leaving and new friends arriving and more quiplash and then the grass getting cold and wet and going ham on keeping the balloons up and then playing that’s what she said (basically CAH but ✨for women ✨) and by this time there was a dude I didn’t know but he was very nice and cute and already taken. Tbh I didn’t know half the people there, there was a group of 4 cool alt people I had never met and then the 4 band kids I already knew but everyone else seemed to know each other and they all had great energy so I yelled a lot and joked a ton and had an amazing time. As the crowd dwindled and the night got cooler, I helped put things away before I left so I could be a nice guest, said my goodbyes, gathered my things, and drove home past midnight. Ask walked around the house turning off lights like my mom asked, I realized that my dad wouldn’t be sleeping here anymore, and I felt bad that he had to spend the night all alone in his new apartment :( and this is going to be a huge financial burden that idk if he can afford, rent for the apartment is almost as much as my mom pays for the house. Jejdjgjt this is all a mess and I would like to go back to ignoring it all <3 Listened to a lot of two trucks by lemon demon lmao

Hoo boy howdy I did a lot of shit today. Basically as soon as I woke up I got a text from dad about us helping him move with a promise of donut holes and a fruit platter. I walked out to the garage to find our family friends the drakes helping to move boxes, so we all spent several hours loading boxes into our cars and driving back and forth from the house to the apartment, with emily and I avoiding the drakes as much as possible lmao. When we had moved as much as we could in the car, we started loading up the uhaul, shoving as much shit in there as possible so we only had to do one trip there and back. Partially through unloading the truck the drakes stopped cleaning things before we brought them in left and some randos from dad’s work came to help unload and somewhere in the middle of all this our aunt and uncle and her service dog came to visit?? Bruh idk so much stuff happened. Emily asked me to take her home so she could work on school stuff and we put things back into the garage and I went back to the apartment to help with stuff and hang out with my aunt while my dad and uncle returned the truck. We made a list of stuff I might need for college and I wrote it down on a notepad and most of the page space was taken up by ponies tbh. The men brought back burger king and eventually my aunt and uncle left. I helped my dad clean up and set up his wifi and we watched mama Mia. It was my first time seeing the film, and it was really dang fun. Then I made dad drive me ho e since emily was still gone with the silver car. I’ll spend he night over there eventually, but not yet. I’m exited to eventually invite friends over since I’ve never been able to do that before. So now I’m home trying g to go to sleep so I can work tomorrow. I keep thinking about smoking weed and making out with someone in the hidey hole in dad’s apartment............ even tho I have literally no one to do that with afsagssg I’m a CHILD. 

Had dreams last night about being stuck on the infinity train again, except there was a mechanic of switching the world between 2d and 3d and the cast of Bluey had to help bingo go through stages of grief / character moments to help her get off the train or something. I was tossing and turning for a few hours anxiously waking up thinking I was gonna be late and going back to bed so I could sleep/dream more. But then I finally got up, fed my cat, fed myself, helped clean the kitchen a little bit, got ready for work, arrived 15 minutes late on accident, worked register for 6 hours, got more comfortable with register and learned how to do stuff, lots of friendly people, lots of me struggling and my bones hurting, dad brought me food but I couldn’t get to my lunch break until everything was room temperature. The chicken sandwich reheated well but the fries did not. After work dad and I stopped by the house, I got an info card to fill out so I can be called in for jury duty eventually, dad handed me $50 for dinner for us and my sister, we laid on the floor and looked at the noodles and company menu, drove there, picked up our food, had a lovely dinner at dad’s apartment, laid around while he talked to Greg on the phone, went to target to pick up small apartment things like a clock and a trash can and some small groceries but it made me nervous because I hate spending money and watching my dad spend money he may or may not have, and by then we were tired as shit and after dropping his stuff off emily and I drove home and I tried teaching her how to crochet for a school project. Now I’m hanging out wanting to go to bed and thinking about how everybody else my age working at ACE is doing like 60 hours a week with 2 jobs and saving for college and I’m just sitting here with probably 14 hours a week and fuck. I don’t want to spiral into shit, I just want to keep busy as much as possible. Maybe I’ll ask for as many work hours as possible, maybe I’ll ask my friends to hang out, idk. Right now I jut want to be busy so I don’t have to think about anything. I’ll spend as much time as possible helping my dad set up his apartment, I don’t care.

WAAAAA TODAY AT WORK WAS SO STRESSFUL, I LEFT FELLNG SO FRAZZLED IT SUCKED. basically I worked register for 4 hours but they’re all trying to ween me off asking for help to get me more comfortable, and we were surprisingly busy, and my garden boss becky asked me to do 2 extra things and my boss boss kept asking about paperwork that I couldn't fill out because I needed my sister to text me something, and an old man got mad at me over the phone because no-one was out there to fill his propane tank and I had a lady waiting for 10 minutes for someone to help load salt into her car and a middle aged man tried to use sarcasm at me while I was in friendly cashier mode aND IM SORRY I HAVE ADHD I DONT GET IT PLEASE S T O P and I tried answering the phone more and I didnt get the things done that becky asked and I left shit there because I just wanteD OUT. afterwards I went to target to get something, idk im writing this afterwards so I not really remember 

and today, my day off. ugh god I dont remember what I did, I know I picked up a vent for my mom’s bathroom and I just went to go get Taco Bell with my sister and bought her some more about crocheting and she’s making progress :) tomorrow is my friend’s birthday and last year I made her a felt doll of her fursona, so today I started making a crochet doll for her. so far I have the body and libs, but I still need to make the muzzle, tail, ears, attach everything, and hand-sew on all the markings and glue on button eyes. or maybe felt eyes, idk. my stomach hurts and I got upset because I told my mom my cat may be sick because her pee looked suspicious so I crocheted and watched my little pony and now I have a headache and im just trying to listen to music but really I just want to watch 50 arms videos at once but it wasn't loading right and idk man I dont know what’s happening, I may be going into work tomorrow. I think now that I have a job to do 3-4 times a week, I dont feel like I can just chill and wing it anymore, it’s like I have plans forever now. and oh god I still have to sig up for college orientation night or whatever, but my mind hasn'tt been on college for like a month or longer. I think im just going to take some Advil and try to relax with my cat and my music. holy shit dude. I know none’s gonna read this but just. fuck. also I should really post these more frequently rather than let them pile up in my texts. thinking about going back and adding all the dates like I did with my early quarantine diary, but that feels like a lot of work

[kramlabs]

six norms that may be making your family less healthy

via Shane Trotter

What is normal is not normal. The human biology expects sunlight, constant movement, physical novelty, whole, natural foods, close relationships built upon shared purposeful efforts for survival, and a generally slow life pace.

Today it is normal to eat exclusively processed, convenience foods, to remain indoors all day except for trips in our temperature controlled cars, to feel pulled and prodded by constant message alerts, and to sit all day, predominantly with our face in a screen while being passively entertained. Normal is a relative term.

Very few forces are as powerful as the human need to belong. Consequently, we naturally tend towards herd mentality, behaving as the masses do, regardless of personal benefit. In fact, we’ll adopt odd “normal” behaviors without even realizing they directly contradict our desires, or that we could choose not to.

The standard model of life that we’ve been handed has created a devastating global health picture and all signs point to this trend worsening in our youngest generation. Now, more than ever, we must be willing to question what is normal and carve a different path.

Freedom is not just having the ability to behave as we wish, but knowing why we choose those behaviors. Through reflection and education, we truly become free and are then able to craft an environment that pulls our family to health and vitality.

If wondering where to start, I recommend exploring these six norms that may be making your family less healthy.

1. Having “Kid Food” Around

There is a widespread belief that there should be a distinction between kid’s foods and adult foods. I’ll never forget a client telling me how she ate well for most meals, but often found herself snacking on her kid's chips or popping a soda. When I suggested she stop keeping these foods in the house, she responded angrily, “I’m not going to not have chips and sodas for my kids.”

I’ve even seen this in healthy parents who make separate meals for their children so the young ones aren’t subjected to nutritious eating, as if this was a torturous experience. They’ll have roasted chicken, brown rice, and mixed vegetables while making chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, or frozen pizza for the young ones.

We’ve been sold the belief that kids can only eat chicken in nugget form, fish in fried stick form, and that the rest of their diet should come from packaged junk. While it is true that palates have to develop, children have always eaten natural, whole foods.

Fruits, vegetables, meat, seeds, and nuts have been the only available foods for almost all of human history. Roasted vegetables, sweet potatoes, and fish are actually childhood favorites when children aren’t engulfed in a world of Pop Tarts and pudding that only further serves to warp their palate. Without a diet predominantly consisting of whole foods, children are virtually ensured of future struggles with health and eating.

Make it simple. Make meals from foods that could have existed 10,000 years ago and have your children eat what you do. Ice cream and other desserts are wonderful occasional treats, but they should require a special trip, not be an always available temptation.

2. Driving As Your Only Mode of Transportation

For most of human history, human muscle moved us wherever we went. Today locomotion outside of our sanitized home or office environment is typically outsourced to the automobile. We even drive across the work campus or endlessly circle in search of a closer parking spot.

Most people struggle to find time for fitness while neglecting to incorporate normal activity into their everyday life. Why is there a need to drive your kids to school if it is less than a mile away? Why must you drive to work if it is just across town? My daily trip to work only went from 10 to 20 beautiful minutes when I switched to a bike commuting lifestyle.

According to the CDC, 71.6% of Americans over age 20 are overweight. Healthcare costs are unsustainable, and yet we drive when it would be almost as easy to use human muscle.

Help your kids break free of this pattern. What a model it would be to make it standard practice to bike when round trips are 10-miles or less, or to walk to pick your kids up from school until they are old enough to walk home themselves.

Despite modern helicopter norms, this is the goal of parenting: to create self-sufficient people capable of creating a purpose and contributing to something bigger than themselves. As much as it scares us we should want them to have this desire for independence and exploration. It sure beats smartphone addiction.

3. Letting Kids Have a TV in the Bedroom

Our environment is powerful. If cookies are always on a plate in the kitchen, we’ll probably make it a norm to grab one while walking by. Replace that norm with a bowl of fruit or ants on a log (peanut butter and raisins on celery), and our snacking norms change.

Screens are an especially pervasive temptation in the modern world. They bring an infinite number of messages. Nowadays, televisions are the focal point of our homes, constantly beckoning us to sit down and stop conversations. But at least we share the programs. They can provide talking points, mutual laughter, and a communal experience not too much different from the primal experience of fireside stories.

Yet, in a kid’s bedroom, the TV brings no positives and many negatives. It is a constant source of distraction from study, reading, getting out to play, or trying any creative endeavor. It is a pull towards more time in isolation and more ability to avoid dealing with potential family conflicts. Most destructively, it is a recipe for poor sleep.

Adolescents and teens need 8 1/2 to 10 hours of sleep per night but tend to average 7 or less. Absent of this they will be foggy, moody, lacking concentration, and at increased risk for the poor decisions that characterize this age.

Their natural body rhythms pull them towards later hours, but school start times rarely honor that reality. Add extra-curriculars and socializing and it can be very difficult for teens to adopt a healthy sleep schedule. These struggles magnify tenfold when they have a TV in their bedroom, which they’ll inevitably watch from bed.

Dr. Craig Canapari, director of the Yale Pediatric Sleep Center, says that the number one thing you can do to help your kids avoid sleep problems now and into adulthood is, never put a television in their bedroom.

The only rationale I can see for putting a TV in bed is to appease your children, despite their own well-being. You are the parent. Be the parent.

4. Giving Kids Smartphones Without Boundaries

Nothing poses a greater risk to your children than that screen they can walk around with every hour of the day. The phone allows millions of messages to shape unhealthy beliefs and values, it prompts poor posture and sitting, it precludes face-to-face communication and overcoming social fears, and it wraps the mind in a vortex of anxiety and a compulsive need for distraction.

At least with the TV you sit and share a single program with other people. The smartphone isolates and constantly prompts you to search for the next best thing after only a brief superficial scan. Take everything wrong with having a television in the bedroom and multiply that by a trillion with the smartphone.

There is no culprit more responsible for the terrifying state of American physical, mental, and emotional health, particularly in childhood than smartphone ubiquity.

But, what are you gonna do, right? It is the world we live in, right?

Please, parents, piss your children off. Tell them no, not until 8th grade and not without tons of boundaries. Why open Pandora's box too early? I’m sure I sound extreme, but this technology is extreme. While working in schools I’ve watched the lobotomization it renders on a generation and, it isn’t just them.

Parents line the park benches scanning furiously. Grandparents and babysitters take their children to bounce houses at odd hours so they can sit and scan their phones uninterrupted. We’ve all seen tech addiction and we’re all subject to the allure. Unchecked smartphone use is the path to a Wall-E type dystopia.

You can’t pretend smartphones don’t exist and you can’t hide them forever, but you can for a while. I highly recommend checking out the screen use recommendations of the American Academy of Pediatricians and using their Create Your Family Media Plan tool. It is very easy and will prompt you through ideas and nuances you may not have considered.

5. Not Managing Smartphone Alerts

As usual, we should start with our own model. Strong parents make strong kids. More often than not we are constantly pulled away from the moment by email dings, texts, and quick scans that turn into a 10-minute mental mindless scroll. This is only made worse by the Apple watch that now supersedes any phone away boundary to shove messages back in your face. Take that dinner time!

Simple recommendations that can help you take back control of your time and be more present for your family:

Anything urgent should require a call. Go to your settings and silence all texts and email messaging. People will learn this about you and it will recalibrate their sense of what is urgent.

Plan the times you will batch all messaging response.

Plan the times you will use social media, apps, etc. For example, maybe you can batch this to two 30-minute blocks within your day. This takes the negative out and makes the tool work for you.

While doing complex work, turn the phone on airplane mode and focus. You’ll get more done.

After work or as you come to dinner, put the phone on a charger, away from you and your bedroom.

Get an alarm clock. A single function device.

Silence all calls and notifications a couple hours before bed. You can make exceptions for people you mark as favorites. This is quite easy to do actually.

6. Buying Into a Modern Youth Sports Culture

After the smartphone, this is truly the toughest insane norm to tread in the modern world. For most of you reading, youth sports were an amazing, integral part of your upbringing. Here we learned essential social skills, how to work on behalf of a team, and how to practice to improve. We played every sport, building a broad array of physical skills that nurtured a love of moving and play. It’s probably where you first fell in love with training.

Today, these foundational experiences have been completely perverted by conmen looking for easy money and a culture of over the top bulldozer parents, willing to pay any price to convince their child they are the center of the universe. Second graders have “signing days” when their parents pay for them to join the “elite” soccer team.

Third-grade football teams put the kids' name on the back of the jersey and have a “pep-rally” every Friday night before Saturday games. Most disturbingly, at earlier and earlier ages, coaches try to convince players they are falling way behind without ridiculous travel, specialization, and expensive skills coaches.

Elementary school kids will have multiple evening practices per week, late games, and long Saturday tournaments. Family time evaporates under the guise that this is what you have to do. By middle school baseball and volleyball parents have conceded their wallets and their summer to travel ball. The family no longer has the option to vacation other than 1,000-mile trips to play athletes just like the ones in their own city.

Clearly, this is an article unto itself. The biggest take-home message is:

This is not the best way to build athletes. Athletic participation is way down, meaning our talent pool is smaller and more kids miss out on these vital experiences. Furthermore, as detailed in the Long Term Athletic Development model, optimal athleticism follows age-appropriate, balanced exposure to sports.

Youth sports should not be expensive and should not be all-encompassing. All the kids want to do is play the game with their friends. Remember that? We’d just go play sports with our friends without coaches or parents and we grew up doing it. Or, we’d go outside and play catch with mom and dad.

Resist the urge to follow the masses into this crazy debt trap. Youth sports can be an amazing experience, but they shouldn’t be the only experiences. How you spend your time matters. Family dinner matters. Family vacation matters.

“It’s no sign of health to be well adjusted to a sick society.”

Krishnamurti

As usual, any broad rambling list will be full of prescriptions that don’t accommodate or appreciate your unique constraints and needs. There are major exceptions to nearly every point I’ve made, but I will stand by the underlying principles. Our standard model is a cultural conveyor belt towards poor health and dissatisfaction.

The best thing we can do is have the courage to buck the norms and live authentically, pursuing a path we earnestly believe in. This will take strength and require you to be counter-cultural. Your efforts matter. Strong parents make strong kids.

This Week’s Mission

Apply any of the suggestions from these six unhealthy norms. If you are unsure where to start, create a family media use plan. Having boundaries tends to offer a great deal of freedom. Without them, we are constantly pulled and prodded, controlled by a constant flood of habit-inducing notifications.

http://breakingmuscle.com/fitness/6-unhealthy-norms-plaguing-us-all

more:

http://breakingmuscle.com/coaches/shane-trotter

[quanganhpham]

dailylife 1

 monday, 29/7/2019. heavy rain in the early afternoon (around 3-5pm) then the weather is very comfortable (not too hot, perfect for a night out but i have no girlfriend to enjoy with :(, what a d*ck! ).

hi tumblr, today is 29/7/2019 which is the first day of me using this website. currently, im a 20 years old boy living in Vietnam. im gonna use tumblr as my diary sharing almost every thing about me as well as a tool supporting my writing. 

9:30pm: 

staying at home with my dad. he is watching movie at his room while i’m at my room.

just created a tumblr account, feeling a little bit excited.

however, i’d prefer having a girlfriend to go out because at this momment, im having plenty of leisure time. on the next two week, new semester will begin and time will surely become scarce.

reading chapter 5: risk and return of Essentials of Investments but having no interest in learning 

considering about buying a new iphone. XR or X???. but im gonna wait till the Iphone Xi to be released and all the previous models got discount. im definitely not a big fan of technology.

purpose of buying new iphone: more convenient, better pics, not for playing game, social media to get girlfriend,...

watching inglourious basterds. this movie is brilliant. perhaps im becoming a huge fan of Quentin Tarantino after watching this movie, The Hateful Eight, Django Unchained, Reservoir Dogs.

these days, i watched a lot of movies (mostly action, horror, thriller) and ate a lot of fast food and unhealthy food (BBQ ribs, fried chicken, snacks, instant noodle)

[fairielust]

yesterday !

ok ok i’m finally gonna sit down n write this shit out before it leaves me shjbgk

ok so as we know yesterday was my japanese excursion (last one evER) n for some god forsaken reason my parents thought it’d be a good idea to see the annual light festival, vivid, on the same day Sooo your girl had to get off an earlier stop @ the end which sucked but i’ll get into detail later lol

so i got up nice n early for a saturday to have a shower n do my makeup n i realised i looked extra asf for an excursion but wisteria knew i had vivid afterwards so i had an excuse lol

our lil class got to the station an hour early to buy drinks n snacks n @ 11 we were all waiting for wisteria who, like a goddamn angel, had come up the stairs n saw us sitting @ a bench n my heart stopped bc i forgot it was a saturday n i was in casual clothes n makeup n seeing wisteria outside of school was incredible wtf

also i was drinking hot chocolate n of course my lipstick was all over the cup n i got heaps shy n quickly drank it all lmao i hate myself

anyway so we’re waiting for the train to come n we’re all chatting in japanese n english about random shit like this movie i watched the night before n how we all did not want to do this speaking thing n how dinner was gonna be the best,,, eventually the train came n we boarded n i got super jealous bc wisteria called one of my friends over to talk about her major work n of course they were talking for the entire time n i was lowkey jealous bc i wanted to sit beside her lmao. we also had to change trains n for some reason it dropped to like -10 degrees ?? n we were all huddled together in a cute asf circle shivering while i constantly asked if i could (jokingly) jump off the platform bc i hATE SPEAKING n i hatE WHEN IM COLD 

all was good n we walked to the fancy asf school where the speaking thing was held n wisteria had to leave us bc she was going to be one of the teacher’s who asked questions 2 the students but like,,, we’re not allowed to go to her n i wanted to die even more bc there was a shit ton of native speakers n a few white teachers n i knew no one but wisteria n i hated it so much omg,,,

i find it ironic how i can speak japanese quite well when i’m not pressured hmmm

so yeah that was a miserable experience n now i’m so scared 4 the real thing help

wisteria had to stay till 4 (we were there since 1) so she let us walk off to the plaza that was nearby n we chilled there until it was close to 4 before we returned. while waiting for her outside the building we all decided to remix a song that we constantly sing in class that’s one of wisteria’s favourite japanese songs (by remix it was like an acapella edm remix where i dabbed bc lit) n when she came out of the building we hurried her over to where we were sitting n started n she was laughing @ our stupidity wow i love an iconic class

next we started walking to the restaurant where we’d be having dinner n it took absolutely forever,,, when we got there there was a small queue n suddenly wisteria got really excited bc she realised that this particular restaurant was the one she wanted to try for a while now n it was so cute tbh (i wasn’t gonna admit that in person tho hell to the no)

we got a table n again i wasn’t sitting beside her :(( but it’s ok bc she teased me either way. my brother had texted me asking if i was gonna get the kid’s ramen n i told that to wisteria n she laughed so loudly lmao

let me tell you. torikaraage, or fried chicken, is legit the best thing in the world. it’s not like kfc. it’s japanese fried chicken. it’s incredible. that’s my obsession, alongside ramen. wisteria on the other hand,,, her favourite drink is oolong tea n when she had it she was squealing like a little girl agAIN so not only is she obsessed with walls n green tea but she also loves oolong tea n i’m just sobbing she’s so precious :’)

we got a group selfie together which was cute <3  

after dinner we started to walk to the train station but we got lost a bit n had to catch a bus but it’s ok we eventually made it lol. 

tho,, along the way,,, wisteria (for the millionth time) had stopped and squealed n it scared me a lil ngl so i turned around n she was already running off w some of us,,, i followed n honestly my breath caught in my throat.

there like this opening which had a view of the city from afar with all the lights on the buildings from the light festival i’m supposed to be seeing afterwards. n while it was afar it was magical ?? like one of those surreal anime moments. just the five of us w their japanese teacher standing in the darkness, watching the city n the lights w the wind in our hair. 

(n i was standing right beside wisteria)

i was actually ready to cry both emotionally n bc i was so tired

we made it to the station n caught the next train n i realised that it was only two stops after that i’d have to get off which SUCKED my gosh. BUT i was sitting beside wisteria n when it got close to my stop i started to hug all my friends goodbye. n then,,, i made a risky move (in my mind, at least) n turned to hug wisteria n she returned the hug n honestly it was one of those(TM) hugs,,, yknow those rare ones that for a moment you actually believe things will be okay n she was so warm n soft n i’m tearing up thinking about it (you best believe my arms did not leave my body the rest of the night) <3

n she jokingly said ‘nice knowing you’ when i said i might get kidnapped n i rolled my eyes n laughed smh !!!

n here’s another thing: i was wearing my scarf the entire day n i had worn it today, n while i was doing something i randomly put my face in it to keep me warm n there was a perfume scent that was most definitely not mine,,, my perfume is sweet n stuff but there was a v new scent that isn’t mine, or my mums, or anyone except wisteria. bc i knew i could smell her perfume when we hugged. oh my fucking god i aint washing my scarf now.

someone (wisteria) pls hold me i’m so emotional n i’m planning on talking to her tomorrow after class to ask if it was possible to have some sort of weekly speaking practice from now to the final speaking exam bc again, i’m an anxious unprepared shit n i need actual help @ this point,,,

okAy that was a wild ride !!! if you made it to the end thank you for reading my emotional ramble !!! i love one teacher n her name is wisteria !!! <3

(also happy pride month fellow tc-er’s if you celebrate it <3)

[strangerfwendz]

May 18

Last night, I messaged brad some selfies of Leo. I’ve decided to name it Leo. He thinks I’m crazy but he joked that I got a new puppy to replace him. He didn’t seem too against it. I fell asleep with the puppy wrapped in a towel next to me. When I woke up I was on the couch in the living room. Brad and I talked a bit it was a nice conversation. My roommates were getting ready for classes and I was sooo tired. I couldn’t get up for a jog. I realized my classes started an hour later that day so I went back to my room to sleep. The puppy was sooo cute! I woke up and put it on top of me and went back to sleep and the little guy went up to my pillow and fell asleep curled up against my face. Adorable!!!

I eventually got up, did a bit of exercise that I learned from fitness club the other day. I cleaned up my bed in the case she messes with any of it and left her on the bed wrapped up in a towel.

I sat with lara, sofia, Julie, and marya at banquet. There was a debate about dress code cause sofia didn’t like that she had to tie her hair up. Especially because she walked through the buffet restaurant and ms anastasiia specifically came over to banquet to tell her to tie up her hair. Just follow the dress code, its not difficult. They were arguing that each teacher has different standards of the dress code and not all of them bother enforcing them or even following the rules themselves. The conversation somehow shifted over to why do we pay so much as globals and where does that money go. Then they called Mr Robert Van Dur Ham over. He suggested that we talk to mr bow about it. Make a case and bring it up to him over email or book an appointment to talk to him at his office. They were serving wine for the main course but it was past 12pm already. I downed the glass of wine and rushed back to palm beach. Leo was still sitting exactly as I has left her, I was relieved and impressed. I swooped her up and went to the pet store that Jason tried to bring me yesterday. Leo was shaking, I was getting anxious. The famous mill mill bar was right next to it pet store up a little staircase. I was really confused when I arrived as the staff was just a little boy? But later on it seemed to be a lady as she spoke knowledgably about the puppy and her products.  But this lady was so short she looked like she never went past puberty in primary school. I asked a bunch of questions about what I should get her and she made a few uncomfortable faces saying, “lets see if she lives first”. Thank you for your honesty but why do you say that? I bought a cage, food bowl, milk powder, puppy food. Jason(les roches) eventually came up to the store but he took so long to come by. When I messaged him earlier before I got there, he said he had just finished taking a shower so he shouldn’t have needed more then 10 minutes. He spoke to the lady and she said the puppy is probably a street dog. Jason threw his hands up and said ‘I knew it! You could buy it in my hometown for just 30 to 40RMB. No one wants it.” Then he sighed and said “oh well, whatever makes you happy.”  Jason’s wife, the driver, came up just as I had finished paying. They helped bring my stuff down. Jason didn’t have classes that afternoon and he skipped his morning class so I’m impressed that he offered to come out to help me during lunch. The driver was very nice to help bring up the things I had bought from the pet store to my room before sending me back to school.  

Vik texted me that I could share the cab with Cesar, some Mexican student from school. He needed to go to the same airport, perfect. I rushed back home after classes, called Andy for a change. Pretty much packed everything I wanted to bring back already, just needed one set of clothes really. I didn’t bother bringing my textbooks except French cause lets be honest, im not gonna study. I quicked setup the cage and put Leo inside. Jason arrived at 3.30pm and I texted Cesar to come up and help bring my suitcases down. I took whatever time I had left to hold Leo a little longer just so she knows I still care about her. Cesar came by, with Natalia who pretty much barged in, whatever. They squealed over Leo for a good 10 minutes of course. I would have loved to talk about Leo a little more but we really had to get going. I grabbed my backpack and Cesar carried both my suitcases down, chill~.

Jason kept asking me about which terminal the my flight was which I understand he’s just trying to help but my freaking ticket seriously didn’t have it written down. Heck, even the flight number was confusing. Eventually he called the airport and checked that it was the terminal one but also that my flight was delayed. Shhiiieettt. Jason said once the flight is delayed , oh man, it gets delayed by the hours and I still have a connecting flight to catch! its especially stressful when the lay over is less than 3 hours, I don’t time for this shit man. Anyways along the way, Cesar was a little panicked too cause he was suppose to meet his friend at 4pm, which made me wonder “why the heck did you stand around my apartment making goo goo eyes at my puppy?” He kept trying to contact his friend which he eventually managed to reach. They charged the meet up place and Cesar wanted to go there straight away, so Jason and I were deciding if we had time to send Cesar off first or not cause they were is different directions but Cesar kept insisting that it shouldn’t be that far from the airport. Jason said it would be an extra cost and we decided to send Cesar off first. Damn that silly boy kept insisting that its just a straight route back but boy that isn’t quite how the roads work around here, those are highways.

Fortunately, things went smoothly after, I got to the airport with enough time to check-in and get to my gate. It was not very busy but the staffs’ attitude really annoyed me. There is a security check-in at the entrance. I find myself standing there in front of the security looking at them like “okay, im standing right here waiting to go in, there isn’t anyone else around. What exactly do you want me to do? HELLOOOO!?!?!” UGH they just dazed off and here I am wondering seriously what if that person is in a rush man. Jeez, it was confusing and slow, the staff are so spaced out and nonchalant, how can I take them seriously? I was pretty irritated, tapping my foot impatiently as I waited in line. The lady at check-in was new, she was just transferred from a different department. She had no idea how to check me in so she asked me to go to another counter. The man at the other counter said I need to go check something inside my suitcase, it was just my old broken phone which I kept to download the rest of my photos but then realized was stupid cause im sure the app would need me to access a vpn in china. I headed over to the gate but when I reached the counter I didn’t realize that I was supposed to return to the check-in counter after checking my suitcase, to get my ticket. Urgh, so freakin annoyed but also so very thankful I know Chinese. God damn can’t imagine how I would survive this semester in Shanghai.

I lost my way a little bit when I was trying to find my gate. I arrived 10 minutes before the gate was scheduled to open but it was still delayed and I hadn’t eaten all day except that bit of bread and wine over lunch. I was craving fried chicken and rushed over to KFC for a quick bite. Yum. I struggled trying to pay attention to the announcements. They were very fuzzy and it felt like the Chinese voice was louder than the English one. I returned to the gate, still delayed. If I knew how long the delay would be, I would have loved to walk around and look at the many shops around but I was afraid that the gate would open at any time. I just sat there moping, listening to my music, and wishing I could sigh harder that I already was to express my frustration.

Finely, we board the plane but the expected arrival time was 11pm and I was suppose to be at the gate of my connecting flight at 10.30pm! Panicked, I asked the flight attendant what was I to do? No way was I gonna make it. I was sat between a grandma with long gel nails and a fancy updo she proudly did herself and a working office lady. During the flight, the lady and I both worked on our laptops then there were snack boxes brought to us. Despite the pathetic appearance, I was curious to try whatever “goods” the box possessed inside.

Afterwards, I started watching a movie while the working lady started reading. *sigh* really boosted the confidence in my own intellect. But whatever, I was entertained by the senseless romance movie I was watching. It had a cute passionate skinny girl who believed in the goodness of frozen food while the male lead was a typical handsome tall Eurasian. Might I just add how handsome the young boy was. God, he had such a pretty boy face. The actor was very good at coming off as arrogant in the beginning too. It probably would have been even better if he could have done it in English for the added intonations in his speech. We landed before the movie could end, I expected that.

Its 11pm and I’m stressing out again. I get off the plane and there is an airport staff waiting outside holding a sign with a light of flight numbers, one of them being my connecting flight. I eagerly show him my ticket for that flight, he says bluntly that there is now way I am going to make it and pastes a big red dot on me. He gives me some instructions about a counter on the second floor, I couldn’t really follow but whatever I’ll figure it out somehow. All the passengers pack themselves on a bus to the terminal and I’m making calls to the airline, they can’t help me because I am missing a code. I let out a sign and mutter under my breathe. A man asks me where I am going, I look over my should and answer accordingly. He had a head of mattered thick dark grey with mixed strands of white. He wore a red T shirt layered with a beige button down and a pair of matching shorts. He looked like an archeologist with a face full of sun spots and a pair of simple glasses. Noticing that he too had a big red dot pasted on his chest, I ask him that same question, he said Singapore. Noiice! From there we start talking in English, man that felt good. We quickly learn about each other as we figure out this shitty situation we’re in. It’s the first time to happen to me but a second time for him. He last time happened in china too, he wasn’t surprised. He explained that in china, especially in shanghai, the air trafficking in terrible. The flights are often delayed. We got our tickets rebooked. My earliest flight was the next afternoon at 2pm while his was at 7am. He decided to go with a flight closer to mine so he could at least get some sleep. He went down to our next destination, where we choose an accommodation of our choice within the two options offered by the airline. I went with the serviced apartments, love those, so much space. We exchange wechat information as we wait for the hotel to pick us up. Eventually, we checked into our rooms after midnight and agree to meet up for breakfast the next morning.

Laurent messaged me! So happy to talk to him again. Its so hard to contact him, miss him dearly. He’s usually busy with his internship in London now but he’s also generally bad at responding to texts. I hate that about him. Anyways I told him about my little trip over the weekend and the whole delayed situation. He said my parents were a little over the top to be spending so much for only two days back. He’s probably right but to them it meant a lot and it was worth the expense. Its there money not mine, especially if it makes them happy. Besides the whole idea of a sudden getaway is very exciting and I get to see my dad!