#im going in to my kids school to do a presentation on digital art

[catmask]

..wha tother like expressions. exist

[pupuseriazag]

Ok so, another type of semi-lost media

This time again, something related to me (I guess? 💀)

Back in bachillerato (my senior year in school for the americans) we all had to take part in a project that was 25% of our global score, this is actually normal for students who are about to graduate and it depends on your school what your project will be (or as we call them here, horas sociales or social hours)

Mine was to buy an specific newspaper every (-counts the days in english in my head) tuesdays and thursdays because they would have some "loose" pages that once completed they would be 2 childrens books, one for literature and one for science

So we had to collect them to make 2 books of each so 4 books per student. And not only that, it was out job to carefully grape or glue them together to make presentable and a nice detail for the children who where going to recieve them.

And my 16 yo me with:

• No actual experience in digital drawing

• No experience (or kniwledge) in shading

• No knowledge theres a thing called stabilizer

Decided to make EIGHT FUCKING ILLUSTRATED PAGES FOR THE BOOKS (not cover arts because they said they all were going to have a generic cover. So my idea was to make a two page illustration in each book like in some childrens books I've seen as a kid)

I made one with a mermaid and a fairy in a tree, one with Peridot and Steven in a classroom explaining the earth, one with a pokemon trainer and her pokemons and a last one with Link and Zelda from spirit tracks.

I say its partial lost meadia because I still have the (unholy) jpgs of them (except the pokemon one, that ones lost).

But Im really not sure if those books actually got to see the hands of a kid 💀 they didnt told us when they were going to deliver them (because of course we werent the only school doing it) so I always got to wonder the reaction of that kid seeing my god awful drawings... Or if those books are alresdy trashed somewhere, which wouldnt surprise me actually 💀💀

Im not gonna show them because some are signed with my legal name but I still have them in a file, getting dustier with the pictures of other older drawings

[sukunastoy]

hey, srry to be the one to rant in ur inbox but i saw u were open to anons and ur one of the few ppl ik in this fandom space thts around my age group and i was just wondering. how??

ive been on tumblr and in fandom/fanfic communities since i waz around 15, its basically my main hobby and pretty much the only social outlet i have, and ive just been so down and so lonely because ive been feeling shunned and excluded pretty much everywhere once i disclose my age and i absolutly completely understand WHY bc there r so many younger ppl in these places, but i dont know what else to do. it feels like nothing is fun anymore. the general consensus seems to b that i should just fck off and have some kids and pay bills until i die. how do u deal with it?? are u ever bothered by it? i feel likr a creep for even being here still, but it’s one of the only things i still have tht brings me joy. srry if that was a lot, i feel bad even compareing myself to u in any way because im nowhere near as talented as u are, absolutly delete this if it makes u uncomfortable whatsoever

hope u are doing well yourself 💙 ty for being u

First of all, NEVER be sorry to rant to my inbox!! And I truly feel appreciative for you to tell me all of this. This is a safe space and you're always welcome to it! My reply is a bit long, I didn't want to flood anyone with a super long post, so the rest is beneath the cut.

I completely understand how you feel, about the age thing and the ever present societal norms of "Must be an adult, must have kids, must do this, yada yada". Its depressing as fuck.

I've been into anime and manga since around 13-14 years old (apart from Pokemon which I've loved -And still do!- since the age of 5.)

I always wrote fanfics, always did fanart, even if I thought it was absolute garbage, I was still so happy just doing it. It has been something that got me through the toughest times in my life. I struggle with suicidal depression, always have for as long as I can remember, even back in my single digit days before even becoming a teenager. When I started to reach the age of "adulthood" I started to shy away from what I loved doing because I felt as an adult, I wasn't allowed to enjoy what I truly loved anymore, cause I needed to "grow up." And I did that. For a while. I rarely acknowledged anime. I sold all of my manga, my wall scrolls, my merch. I stopped drawing/writing it as much cause I needed to focus on being an adult, paying my bills, going to college, all that crap.

But, I got worse in my depression. I self harmed, had to go to therapy, had to start medication, and at one point I actually wrote that final goodbye note because I couldn't handle the norm of "being a mature adult" so I figured I must be useless otherwise. If I wasn't happy playing my adult role in society, what was the point of me even living?

During this time I went to college for 3 years, stressing, crying, working on a degree that I didn't even want because I thought it was expected of me. (I've always wanted to go to an art school and get a degree there. But my parents and everyone else in family told me, thats not a real degree. So I left it behind...) For 3 years I wasted my time and money and sanity to try to appease the people who don't pay my bills, don't put food in my mouth and certainly don't do shit for me otherwise, and I finally stopped and thought...

WHY?

WHY am I trying to impress and fit in with people who don't even really know me or provide for me?

I dropped out of the college that was stressing me out. I lost that money, but oh well, I was miserable, and my mental health is more important to me.

I don't want kids. I don't want that boring life of "just work til your dead". I don't want to have boring hobbies that I don't even like just to fit in with the people of my age range who I could care less about.

I'm turning 30 in a few months, and I regret wasting a few years of my life trying to fit into this norm of, bullshit. (And please note to whoever is reading this, if doing a lot of the 'norm' and having a family with kids and everything IS happiness for you, that is beautiful!! I am only referring to the people who don't want that life, and it should NOT be forced upon them.)

I love anime. I love drawing it, writing fics for it, interacting with other people over it, and I don't know why I ever tried to deny that.

I was afraid to return online in the fandoms because surely everyone must only be young teenagers right? Actually, not at all!

I've interacted with SO MANY people near my age range, and, it is truly amazing.

There are lots of people close in age, sometimes they're just a little difficult to find, but they are there, I promise, and they are amazing. I've enjoyed anime more in my adult life now than when I was younger tbh because I stopped caring about what others think and that my age is literally just a number. I'll be 30. So what, that doesn't change what I love. My body is getting older, that's all. I am still ME.

My fiance and I still go out and play Pokemon Go, collect Pokemon cards, like, I have BINDERS full of cards. The store we go to is ALWAYS packed with other people our age and way older who love Pokemon, Digimon, YuGiOh, and all sorts of other anime things they offer there.

These people are out there!

I started being more open with my likes and interests with strangers and coworkers, and I found out a lot of people really are into this, but felt they had to keep it hidden cause they didn't want anyone to think they were weird because of their age.

I surround myself with those who I know are supportive of me, or don't have a problem with my likes and interests and I stay away from those who try to shame me, and I kick them out of my life because I don't need that negativity in my circle. Some people my age who aren't into anime don't have a problem with me being into it at all. They've never shunned me for it. If anyone does, goodbye.

Life is short, its hard, its shitty. It doesn't need to be made worse by trying to appease those who aren't providing for you or feeling like you're not allowed to love what you love. So enjoy the things you love to enjoy. If there's something that you can latch onto that brings honest happiness into your life, cherish it.

I hope this helped in some way...even if just a tiny bit...

I know it was long, but I wanted to explain as much as I could so you don't feel like you're alone or left behind in the fandoms because of age. I tried to deny what brought me joy, and it only brought me more misery. I hated it.

I'm so much happier now, and I truly hope this type of peace comes for you soon as well.

Always feel free to drop in my inbox as anon, I would NEVER delete something like this.

Again, I hope this helped. If I didn't acknowledge something, or seemed to entirely misunderstand, I dearly apologize and please correct me if needed!!

💕 (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

(❁´◡`❁)~Stay shameless!

[staying-home-is-killing-me]

Mega Oof. So apparently I was nominated by @shiny-armin to do the people they would like to know better

Here goes nothing

...

Name: I prefer not to say my name. So Turtle. (Given by close friends)

B-day: Feb. 1st.

Zodiac: I don't really look into that stuff. But I'm an Aquarius, and I'm pretty chill and calm most of the time but if you interrupt my music... You're officially dead. I don't get angry at people most of the time and you can see at school Im that chill kid in the back also im kind of competitive. But other than that im on the quiet side and I don't say much. I don't do feelings or get crushes and I only stick in a group of me and a few people I know very well. But I do have a lot of other friends that I also talk to. ( why did I add this but I have resting bitch face so by the looks of me, you won't want to mess with me)

Height: Im 5'1 or 5'2. (Im still growing)

Hobbies: Bike riding. Going on peaceful walks. Listening to music ( to block out all of my problems and relax). Reading Webtoon and digital painting. Also im not very good but I doodle and draw a lot.

Favorite Color: I like dark colors like Red or blue or black or green. It changes a lot but i dont have a specific favorite

Favorite Books: Ive been reading this book called All American Boys it's about racism in the present. Number the stars is good. The Giver. The Tiger Rising. Six Of Crows (in progress) The Leven Thumps series

Last song I listened to: Sugar Lips by Midnight in April. (They are very talented)

Last movie I saw: The latest one was Spider-Man Far From Home (Gosh Diddly Darn Mysterio. Jeez) and before that was Steven Universe the Movie (my favorite show. I very highly recommend it)

Dream Job: A chef because I like to experiment with new things. Also an actor because I thought maybe when I make it big i might have money so I could provide for my (future or present) family.

Meaning behind my URL: I don't really know what that means so im just gunna say it's my blog...... Idk I just made this cuz why not. There are memes and funny stuff and cool art about things I like so why not I pitch in.

...

So how did do...

Also I want to nominate some people too. So 8 people I would like to know better are... @drinkyourfuckingmilk @ackerbang @ruthfigueroa19 @byallmeans1 and @spectral-ink @guccibootyellow @incorrectkuroshitsuji @incorrect-assclass

(it's fine if you dont want to.)

[olmopress]

Man-ia-vich

week 9: Vincent Miller, “Key Elements of Digital Media” / Lev Manovich, “The Language of New Media”, Prologue: Vertov’s Dataset, Introduction - Mapping New Media: The Method, Ch. 1: What Is New Media?

We’ve had a week’s pause and it looks like cinema is going to play a big role in this second half of the course, so well, yeah, I decided it was a good idea to bless you with a still of one of the greatest shots in film history. Ten points to anybody who makes the rights guess on the name of the film.

OFF TO THE READINGS

Our first reading wasn’t thaaat relevant. I mean, yeah, it provided you with a sort of bird’s eye view of the status of research on this topic (i.e. digital media) but nothing too transcendental. You read about Mark Poster and his silly idyllic idea of the ‘internet model’ that generates active critical subjects and promotes a postmodern unstable identity, about Lister et al. who focus on (back then) supermega catchy phrases like hypertext, interactivity, scotomization, dispersion and bla bla bla bla bla.

BORING AF

(though I have to say Poster has a point in talking about the blurring of the distinction between producer and consumer on the internet. We, the people of the future, all are prosumers. Sadly).

The saucy stuff in Miller is all about Manovich, of course. But you know, we had to read him first hand, so maybe I better switch to the guy straight away, right?

You OK with that Miller?

Thanks a lot, Kaz.

So. Lev Manovich. Let me first spend a few words in general about the guy. I sense Imma love this man’s scriptures. I’ll tell you why:

1:

He’s RUSSIAN.

Which means badass intellectualistic and sophisticated and at times almost obscure, but you gotta love him because he has inheritend the gifts of FORMALISM.

2:

He defines himself as a DIGITAL MATERIALIST. And we all know who he is hinting at, don’t we?

It’s daddy! Yay!

3:

He’s a full-fledged philosopher who isn’t scared at all to theorize per bene and also make use of:



Yeah that is an anime representation of the young Karl Marx. Course he’s handsome as fuck.

BUT TO THE TEXT

Actually, there isn’t so much to discuss about. The Prologue is quite fascinating, but it is essentially a collection of stills from Dziga Vertov’s Man With a Movie Camera coupled with out-of-context quotes from the book. As I said, it is fascinating, stimulating, and frankly quite artistic, but it is hard to actually make something out of it if you aren’t already familiar with Manovich’s theory.

SO HERE’S ANOTHER OUT OF CONTEXT SET OF QUOTES

INTERTWINED WITH RANDOM SHOTS FROM FILMS

“A flower was offered to me, Such a flower as May never bore; But I said 'I've a pretty rose tree,' And I passed the sweet flower o'er.”

“I am not a man who approves of definitions. Labels belong on luggage as far as I’m concerned; they don’t mean anything in art.”

“the computer fulfills the promise of cinema as a visual Esperanto.”

“The demand for perfection is always a sign of a misunderstanding of the ends of art.”

“all you negative muthafuckas should look at me as inspiration. im 23 fucking years old and built a fucking monster and im not ever gonna fucking land. stop being scary and neagtive and start believing in yourself and stop living for all these other fucking idiots.”

“The cameraman, whom Benjamin compares to a surgeon, “penetrates deeply into its [reality’s] web”; his camera zooms in order to “pry an object from its shell.” Due to its new mobility, glorified in such films as Man With a Movie Camera, the camera can be anywhere, and with its superhuman vision it can obtain a close-up of any object…”

“I don't know where i'm going from here, but I promise it won't be boring”

Ten points to anybody who can detect the two Manovich quotes. Come on kids it is way too easy.

Of course the Introduction is a little bit more dense with stuff. But it is still and introduction: it essentially presents us the architecture and the basic assumptions of the book. Manovich tells us he uses film history and theory to look at digital media, he introduces the deductive concept of “digital materialism,” he mentions briefly his “Principles of New Media” – which are, by the way, numerical representation, modularity, automation, variability, and cultural transcoding – and then he specifies a little about some of his terminology.

LET’S REVIEW THIS QUICKLY

language: my man Manovich says he was scared to solicit associations with the structuralist motherfuckers theorists (my man Man, y u hate semiotics?), but then using “aesthetics” or “poetics” would have been even worse so he got stuck with language.

I can see why you wouldn’t use  a e s t h e t i c s, Man.

object: he prefers it over product, artwork, interactive media, or other stuff. Doing so he wants to activate connotations that span from software lingo to 1920 Russian avant-garde and laboratory experimentation. I mean, quite an ambitious project.


BUT WE LIKE HIM THIS WAY

The only thing I am doubtful about is why not using “product” if you’re theory is infused with Marxism.

You should know better, Man.

representation: OK this is hella complicated but I’ll try. So far as Manovich says that new media objects are cultural objects (and thus participate in the construction of reality just like any other cultural artifact) I’m fine. But then he lists six different ways of connotating the word representation, and I don’t know about you, but I got kind lost there. These oppositions are:

Representation-simulation Representation-control Representation-action Representation-communication No taxation without representation Visual illusionism-simulation Representation-information

BOH

I guess I’m gonna have to read through the book.

The last few pages of the reading are very nice and come from the first chapter. Manovich bestows on us the knowledge of the fact that he’s writing approaching new media NOT in terms of consumption – as any other idiotic person who is not him in the world used to do – but primarily in terms of production.

CONGRATULATIONS! YOUR MARXISM LEVEL HAS JUST REACHED 100

So yeah, this is the big thing. Together with his historical disamina, in which he basically says that cinema and the computer aren’t that different after all. After all, they have a history in common, after all. After all.

I’ll spare you names and date. Learn from my wonderfully detailed and perfect sketch:

So computer, Manovich tells us, is fundametally a visual media. It is a machine that processes media through mathematics.

EXCITING

BUT ALSO ENOUGH FOR TODAY

SO

CULTURE

I like the fact that Manovich seems to be taking all these new approaches and be a sort of ventata d’aria fresca in the theoretical discourse. This makes me think of this song. Listen to it.

As for our painting… there is a surprise. So essentially I am so excited about this centrality of cinema in Manovich that i am giving you MORE CINEMA. So take a look at this excerpt from Luis Bunuel’s Un chien andalou, because I think it may have to do a lot with what we are talking about here.

さようなら!

Image Sources: PopMatters, vermelho.org, TeePublic, PBS, Jet d’Encre, Slant Magazine, Film School Rejects, Medium, Variety, The New Lens International, Imgur

[kwanfairy]

Quarantine Asks: Questions You Usually Wouldn’t Think of Asking But You’re Bored AF

Here is the link to the original post in case you wanna do it too ! also: @stitchzmile i want you to do it too :D <3

Animated character that was your gay awakening? jesus.. i actually dont know. as a kid i thought jessie from pokemon and kim possible were super hot LOL but i dont think they were my gay awakening.. 

Grilled cheese or PB&J? grilled cheese

What show/YouTube video(s) do you put on in the background when you when you don’t have anything to watch but you want something on? i actually dont do that but i love to put on some “relaxing celtic music” in the BG whenever i write!

Your go-to bar order, if you drink? that depends as i dont really like alcohol. if its about enjoying it, probably baileys, if its about getting hammered, jägermeister or other shots.

What’s your favorite pair of shoes that you own? i dont own enough shoes plus i dont really care about them lol but the new ones i bought are really comfy so i guess it’s them?

Top three cuisines? i like heavy/greasy food so german/austrian, asian, italian

What was your first word as a child (that wasn’t a variation of “Mom” or “Dad”)? no fucking clue but im super curious now and will ask my mom later!

What’s a job that you’ve had that people might be surprised to find out you’ve had? working as a language assistant w/ american students as im super anti-social and introverted

Look up. What’s directly across from you? my black wall (that ive painted myself!!) lol

Do you own any signed books/memorabilia in general? eventho i cant think of any i should have some, right? doesnt everyone have something thats signed??

Preferred way to spend a rainy day? on my ps4 or writing with my balcony door open so i can hear the rain

What do you get on your bagels? What WOULD you get if you had access to anything you wanted? we dont do bagels here or sandwiches and ive only been to subway once, was totally lost, amde a fool out of myself and never went to one ever again lol

Brunch or midnight snacks? brunch! eventho i love eating midnight snacks, my tummy doesnt react well to them....

Favorite mug you own as a none-coffee drinker, i dont have one

What coffee drink would you describe yourself as? probably milk-coffee? im super white and most people dont like me ^^

Pick a song lyric to describe your current mood (and drop the name and artist!) ive been anxious for the past week cause we have to do a presentation for work and my anxiety riddled brain is freaking out. but ive been trying to remind myself that, while its a struggle, its also an opportunity to show myself what im capable of! “I will never ever know, if i quit now” - Mess by Jasmine Sokko

Fruity or herbal teas? i do like both but prefer fruity ones

What’s that one TV show that you’re a little bit embarrassed to watch but you still like nonetheless? motto ojamajo doremi - its just really cute!

That book you were forced to read for class but actually ended up enjoying? The wave

Do you match your socks? yas

Have you ever been horseback riding? yup during sports-week at school, but i was terrified all the time and had no idea what i was doing LOL

What was your “phase” when you were younger? (i.e., Mythology Nerd, Horse Girl, Space Geek, etc) if loner counts, then that ^^

Have you ever been to jail? nope, but i kinda really wanna see one from the inside smh

What’s your opinion on Lazy Susan’s (the spinning tray in the middle of tables)? i only know them from chinese restaurants and they are quite handy if ya do food sharing but otherwise i dont really see the use

Puzzles? need to be in the mood but haven done one in yeeeears

You can only have one juice for the rest of your life, what is it? orange juice for sure

What section do you immediately head for when you walk into a bookstore? i rarely go to a bookstore rip i know but when, i usually check their manga section first (rip x2 lol) and then the thriller one

What’s one thing you’re trying to learn/relearn in your downtime right now? im on day 382 on my duolingo japanese course! also, the fic im currently writing has taught me a lot about not over editing and paraphraph-ing (whetever that is actually called)

Who’s your go-to musical artist when you’re feeling upbeat? not into musicals

Where could someone find you in a museum? that depends which museum it is. but im usually trying to follow a path that brings me past everything

What’s that one outfit in your closet you never get the chance to wear but want to? the super duper emo-like red plaid pants a friend of mine gave me years back.

Rainbows, stars, or sunset colored clouds? pink louds!

If you could own any non-traditional pet (dogs, cats, fish, rodents, etc), what would it be? while im quite wary of birds, emus look kinda cool. oh or a wombat maybe? or an axolotl!

Do you have more art on your walls or more photographs? art that either i or my mom has drawn

You have to get one meme tattooed on your body, what meme is it and where does it go? as embarrassing as it is i LOVE memes so i cant choose just one.

Pick a superhero sidekick to hang out with im not really into superhero stuff so i dont really know any sidekicks.. if ron from kim possible counts then him id say lol

Lakes, rivers, or oceans? lakes for sure, oceans are just too wide and deep and scary

Favorite mid-2000s song im totally blanking now but the only 2 that came to my mind were britney - toxic and baby bash - suga suga

How do you dress when you’re home alone? pyjamas

Where do you sit in the living room (we all have a preferred spot, and you know it)? in front of my comupter lol

Knives or swords? knives

A song you didn’t think you’d enjoy but ended up loving bewhy - gottasadae

Pick an old-school Disney Channel Original Movie is camp rock one? i dunno we didnt have disney channel

Are you a “Quote that relates to the photos” caption-er, an “explanation of where I took the photos” caption-er, or a no caption kinda person when you post pictures online? i never post pics online lol but i guess id be more of an explanation kidna gal

Name a classic Vine god there are so many good ones but the first that came to my mind was “stop! i coulda dropped my croissant!” and the “ok :D” guy in the jungle

What’s the freezer food that you stock up on when you go to the grocery store? veggies! i love veggies so my freezer usually is full of it

How do you top your ice cream? ew, i dont!!

Do you like Jello? non-native english speaker here. wtf is jello. is is this clear wobbly shit? if so, then no, gross!

What’s something that you don’t have a picture of that you wish you did? well ok i do have pics, but like, actual photographs of my dog but i wish i had more and digital ones as well :( i really fucking miss him even after all this time and it would be so nice to have more quality pics of him...

How are you at climbing trees? as someone whos scared of heights and abso-fucking-lutely grossed out by bugs... take a guess :)