#im fucking laughing like an absolute madman in class

[human-resourccs]

gotham rogues as scottish tweets

Harley Quinn: realised how shite bein a girl is, spent half my life on a diet, bleeding or crying whilst boys just helicopter their nobs n call us psychos

Scarecrow: just seen a bird shoutin at her bairn to put his pants on then pointed at me sayin 'look the mans gonna steal ur willy' Wtf no am no

Catwoman: burd in the pub kept tellin everycunt her cat had thumbs n then we ended up in her gaff and shit u not that wee hing could beat u at Fifa

Riddler: a say "ano" a lot for somecunt that knows absolutely fuck all aboot anythin

Two Face: "huving one of they days" aye right man am huvin one of they lives

Penguin: aw a ever hink aboot is scran, swear tae fuck al be sittin eatin ma dinner n am hinkin what am i gonnae have after it

Poison Ivy: "u canny hate someone forever" aye a can watch me

Joker: reminder that JK Rowling a grown woman multi millionaire blocked me for calling her made up character in a book about wizards a specky cunt

Mad Hatter: im at the age where people r askin "so what u doin with ur life" n im like mate am genuinely jus here for a laff x

Mr Freeze: ye ever wanty just wrap yerself up in tinfoil nice and cosy and then just fucking get right inty the microwave and blow yersel up ta fuck

[curioscurio]

Seriida headcannons because i have brainrot:

• One day Sero puts on roller skates and waits till Iida starts his warm up of running as fast as he can around the tract and right as he takes off Sero shoots his tape at Iida.

• Funniest 3 minutes of Seros life. that is until Iida realizes he has a stowaway and IMMEDIATELY stops but SERO KEEPS GOING

• Long story short Iida has to run Sero to the nurses office because he skated into a tree

• That video of a car driving by with crazy revved engines but someone was playing a trumpet in it to make car sounds thats sero and iida but sero is riding on his back

• Theyre both health nuts but like on opposite sides of the spectrum

• Iida eats 12 vitamin gummies and protien shakes and enhanced health juices and shit

• And sero is like "iida.... the chemicals.." and eats a handful of basil before going out the door to energize himself

• Iida snores and sometimes when he snores his engines will gently purr and tbh it drives Sero absolutely wild. He thinks its the cutest thing ever

• Yes iida will occasionally smoke with sero but only off of school property on a weekend where he can just tell everyone they were out on a date

• Which they usually are but you know

• Sero leans on Iida all the time. He's sleepy? Lean. Need a shoulder to put his head on? Lean. Looking over his shoulder? Hand on the small of his back and lean. Arm over the shoulder. Hanging off his neck. Mans a koala basically.

• Iida likes to fix Sero's hair or tie or uniform when it's messy or out of place. Sero laughs but if it's in front of his friends he blushes like a madman

• Sero is really good at origami and makes little flowers for Iida. Iida is not imune to origami flowers

• Sometimes Sero falls asleep on Iidas shoulder during movies or when he's high or during late night studying and Iida takes it upon himself to carry him to his room every single time...

• in like 5 more mins tho i mean the movie is almost over theres no reason to wake him up yet 👀👀

• Seriida fusion would be named Hanten and their quirk would be asphalt feet so like. Imagine the sole of their feet produces molten asphalt and on the ankle is a wheel that flatens it out as soon as they roll over it. Essentially heelies that pave roads if that helps.

• Sero loves hearing Iida ramble and just lets him speak about whatever's on his mind and Sero will listen intently

• Example It's very obvious when Iida has a bad day and he will try and hold back because he doesnt want to overhwelm Sero but the minuite Sero asks what's wrong Iida let's it all flow out

• On the other hand, getting Sero to talk about his deep feelings is like pulling teeth and sometimes it's hard for Iida because Sero will just Not Want To Talk About It and iida just wants to find a solution or fix the problem

• Also sorry kind of off topic but Iida is the "can i speak to the manager" and "excuse me he ask for no pickles" and sero eats the pickles so not to cause a scene

• Who's more reckless Iida or Sero? Well

• Iida is reckless in life or death situations and will always sacrifice himself for a civillians sake or to avenge something and Sero has to snap him out of it.

• "Oh my god! Some idiot hero just rushed into the burning bulding at incredible speeds-"

• Sero, swearing: "thATS MY IDIOT"

• Sero is casually reckless as in driving one handed, jumping into unknown situations, jumping off roofs but trusting that iida would catch him, approaching a wild animal, that kind of thing.

• Does things that he doesnt realize are reckless. Would drink cactus juice because plant=water of course

• Iida has to stop him from licking swingsets because Denki dared him to

• THEY TAKE CARE OF EAVHOTHERRRR

• When sero forgets to eat and iida bring him a snack and/or a meal

• Sero taking on some of Iida's communal chores because Iida already does like 26363u3 things for their class

• Iida letting Sero cuddle close to him when its really cold outside and it feels like he's back in the ice at the sports festival and everyone is watching and pitying him but oh! Iida is there with an arm over his shoulder and now it's just the two of them and sero feels warm again and oh wow iida is a big man

• Sero noticing that it's Iida's turn to cook for the dorm that night and see's the way Iida's hands shake when it comes time to slice the vegatables and Sero gently takes the knife away from his trembling fingers. Gives iida a new task and takes over most of the cooking but sero really doesnt mind.

• When iida has nightmares about that dark alleyway and the smell of blood and wakes up thrashing but calms down because the smell of the insence in seros room is nothing like blood. The salt lamp in the corner keeps the darkness away and sero groggily asks if he's ok and grabs iida's hand and helps him breathe through it. sero gets up and makes iida a cup of tea and listens to iida talk about his dream and reassures him till iida can fall back asleep

• Middle of a battle and Iida gets cut up on his arm but Sero INSTANTLY drops by him to apply a tape bandage and make sure he's ok

• A villain is about to strike Iida from behind but suddenly his weapon stops mid swing and he's completely imobilized by tape and holy shit have you ever seen cellophane that pissed off before ??

• Sero fighting a villain up on a super high building but gets knocked out and thrown off and iida can only see a small silhouette plummeting from the sky from where he is. Iida books it as fast as he can and just barely manages to catch Sero before he hits the ground.

• When Sero wakes up he weakly snickers and Iida is holding him close, panicking, and asks "what's so funny??? Do you have a concussion" and seros like "i bet denki 20 buck i that the next time i got knocked the fuck out i would wake up in your arms. Im taking you out someplace bougie tonight babey"

[dontshootmespence]

Through It All

Part 26

Summary: Now married, Spencer & Y/N navigate the D/s lifestyle. How will their relationship change?

Words: 1,083

Warnings: None

A/N: Fluffffff

Now she wants all the control. It feels like you and Spencer are doing twice the laundry because she wants to feed herself, but she’s a total mess. At first, the mess bothered Spencer - he likes his things neat and tidy and in the right place - but eventually he just let it go and even started joining in messy eating just for the fun of it.

Charlotte even wants to pick her own clothes and help herself get dressed, which is difficult when you’re in a rush and just need her to put her legs in the leg holes and fucking move, but you let her do as much as she can anyway. You want to foster an independent little girl who’ll ask for help when she needs it. Thankfully, today is a slow day. It’s a Saturday and your only plans are to go get her some new clothes because she’s growing out of her 18-month clothes already.

When Spencer brings her outside, you hide your laugh. She’s chosen a pair of bright blue sweatpants and an orange shirt with pink shoes and a purple hat. “Ready to go, Charlie?”

You and Spencer gulp down the rest of your morning coffees, which are now cold and grab a banana for the trip to the store. “You want one?” Spencer asks her.

“Nanner!”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he laughs, scooping her into his arms. “Away we go!”

----

In the store, Charlotte  takes the lead, bringing you in all different directions. Sometimes it’s toys. Sometimes it’s bikes. Sometimes it’s food. Eventually, after saying hello to everyone she passes with a tiny little wave, you find yourselves in the clothing sections. First, she drifts toward the ‘boys’ section and grabs a shirt with Mario and Yoshi on it because ‘dino,’ before quickly grabbing a shirt with Captain America’s shield on it, probably because she recognizes the one you wear at home.

After sauntering through the boys’ section and trying (with varying degrees of success) to instill in her that she couldn’t buy everything in the store, Spencer runs with her to the girls’ section, careening the shopping cart in and out of aisles like a madman. But she’s loving it, so you just shout at them to be careful, stopping long the way to get her a new pair of sneakers and a pair of slippers that look a lot like Spencer’s that she loves to try and steal.

When you finally catch up, you see Spencer holding up two different dresses, telling her to pick one. “I figure every two things she picks up she can choose one.”

“Sounds good,” you reply. “Probably more comprehensible for a 20-month-old to choose between two things rather than ‘you can’t have everything.’”

“Exactly.”

With Spencer’s method, she makes a few choices of her own - a rainbow pastel dress, light green sweatpants, a pink sweatshirt and a sparkly green dress with Ariel on it - and then chooses between some outfits that you and Spencer pick out. You make it a game to see which one of you can put together the best outfit, best in this case meaning Charlotte picks it over the other. Spencer wins twice and you win once. Then Spencer sticks his tongue out.

“Is she the 20-month-old or are you?” You laugh.

He sing-songs that he won as he carts her out of the aisle and toward the food section for the few staples you need to pick up. Charlotte asks for Daddy to ‘race’ again, and Spencer’s more than happy to oblige, using a few empty aisles to just run the cart in circles for a few minutes while you answer your phone.

Minnie’s warm voice floats over you. “Hello, dear. How are you and Spencer doing?”

“We’re doing okay. Just taking Charlotte for some new clothes.”

“Well, I have some news for you. You’ve been chosen again.”

“Really?” Your hearts races a mile a minute as you flag Spencer down and beckon him to come over. “Who is she? How far along is she?”

Spencer’s mouth drops open, his breath hitching in his throat. You’re both afraid of getting your hopes up again, but you also can’t help the excitement. Charlotte’s too busy with a sparkly heart wand she found to care, plus you and Spencer made an agreement not to say anything until you were reasonably sure your birth mother was in this for the long haul.

“Well, she’s 19. She and her boyfriend are both in agreement on this and they both love your profile. They’re on their way to prestigious universities and they don’t think they can be great parents and great students at the same time. You and Spencer could meet them both. She’s been with us since she found out at just five weeks. She’s 10 weeks along now. But there’s a catch.” Her voice trails off and your heart sinks and rises in quick succession. You can hear her smile.

“What’s the catch?” You ask.

Spencer quirks an eyebrow and he’s white-knuckling the handle of the shopping cart.

“She’s having twins. And she insists they be adopted together.”

“Twins?!”

The mixture of excitement and undeniable fear makes you want to vomit. Two at once? “Now, I know this is a big commitment. Two at once is no joke, but I wanted to let you know so that you and Spencer could talk it over. Do you think it’s something you’re interested in?”

You spoke softly, trying to still the quiver in your voice. “I think so. Spence and I need to talk things over. We can call you back in a couple of days?”

“Absolutely. If you have any questions let me know.”

A quick goodbye and she disconnects the call, leaving you to stare in amazement at your husband. “Twins. Spence, two of them? Can we do that?”

“Why not?” His smile is a mile wide. As he tousles Charlotte’s hair, tears well in his eyes. “I mean there would be an increased financial burden, but I think we could handle it, especially with the flexibility in my work schedule. I could add online classes too. I’m sure your parents could help us those first few months. And I know Penelope and Luke, Emily, JJ and Will, they’d all help us with babysitting.”

“Are we gonna have twins?” You ask, a sob bubbling up from your toes.

Spencer pulls you close and kisses the top of your head. “I think we’re having twins.”

@heycasbutt @ultrarebelheart @katherineisagubler @proud-slytherin-ghost @randomwriter23 @fandom-queen67 @sixx-sic-sixx @xqueenofthecraziesx @aofay02 @groovyreid @criesinreid @jdougl-love @xreider @cringeemospntrashassbutt @prettyboyeffect @prettyboyreid @themanip @spencerreidsthings @augustgraceful @whollytaciturn @prisonreid @factualfic @jasmine-negron @snitchthewitch @ellabobella051419 @crazyforsstuff @kaatelyyynn​ @jane-dough @dreatine @bitter-post-millennial @adlerorzel-blog @hallieedrew @psychedelephantt @krisymccall996 @4ueijos @mclaujac @ray-likes-starwars @nurseemilyblog @slightlyvicked @she4567 @guesswhosback129 @princessdolan @happycreatorfangirl @fallwhisper @nyemadowell @sammy-jo1977 @sin-bin-and-tragedies @imsuperawkward @ahhahahaheehee @crispygiantsaladgarden @reputay-swift @pizzarollsfordayz @andiebeaword @timey-wimey-lovi @garbagecanfics @friedparadisetale @dereksbetaa @idontevenknow2 @holyfishloverfarm @nohemi2500 @typeshitbih @sadgirlhan @kmc217 @bigbuttsowhatuniverse @charmedfandomgal @im--blushing @dangerouspersonllamabagel @fichoe21 @yes-sir-hotchner @thefandomallrounder @mrsenos08 @walkerchick007 @letsdisneythings @winchesterqueenie @specialagentleigh @spn-wheresthepie @haileymew @bitchyoulied @geniusgub @urdicksmol @6lack6erry @slutlanna976 @downondilaudid​ @baileysb1tch @la-vie-en-amour1​ @letsdoit-tomorrow @eideticprettyboydrreid​ @lazynoodledragon​ @shybaby231 @aimzonicles97​ @grace-superpowers​ @softestlavender​ @ssa-dr-ladylock​ @drprettyboy​ @patricks-fabulous-face​ @tearosaria​ @shxdowofdarkness​ @marvels-gurl​ @gublergirls​

[puukkolesbo]

@sokkadyke u wanted to know my thoughts? i'll give u my thoughts!! (the fic is unconditionally and irrevocably - an absolutely AMAZING zukka twilight au that everyone should go read rn)

imma put down my thoughts on this post as i read the chapter. putting this under a read more bc i might get rambly

just the chapter summary has got me SO EXCITED. i am so ready for katara questioning her brother & all of the suki/yue content in this fic is just SO GOOD, ppl, SO DAMN GOOD. also skipping school is *chefs kiss* peak high school romance content and i’m desperately trying to unlock my twilight memories bc IS THIS WHERE WE GET TO SEE ZUKO GLITTER IN THE SUN??? okok on to the actual fic now

ahh, that sibling solidarity of not asking anything in front of the parent even tho u desperately want to interrogate ur sibling<3<3<3 also sokka w beautiful, beautiful awkward teen avoidance of personal questions

sokka ur little sister has A PLAN and u should probably be AFRAID. torturing ur sibling w not asking the questions u clearly want to ask and letting them sit in their own stew for days is also peak sibling interaction. the dynamic between katara and sokka in this fic is one of the many, many things that make me love this fic so much more than the og twilight

zuko getting over the avodation phase and jumping into the ‘i wan to know everything’ phase is a BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL thing. also that unnecessary touching????????? SIR, YOU ARE IN A SCHOOL. STOP MAKING UR CRUSH BLUSH. STOP BEING SUCH AN ADORABLE ASSHOLE FLIRT

i already yelled about this @ haley when they dropped this snippet as a preview in my messages bUT LET ME YELL ABOUT IT AGAIN. its just !!!!!!!!!! SO GOOD !!!!!!! i still cant believe i had forgotten about the whole ballet thing in og twilight & the mental image of bby katara and sokka doing ballet together is SO PRECIOUS i cant get over it

damn boys, get a hold on yourselves. ya gotta study. or at least sokka does. also can yall imagine sitting behind these fools in class? can you? u would be torn between wanting to smile at their cuteness and wanting to throw up bc they are TOO cute already at this point in their budding relationship. in fic form tho? i can just grin like a madman while reading

ohhhhhhhhhh yeah didnt expect that either sokka

lmao this is a mood and a half

oh sokka, you fool. if u want to avoid a topic, then u avoid it at all costs. ESPECIALLY when u want to avoid it w ur little sister. bc little sisters are RUTHLESS

alright im not gonna screencap the entire questioning convo, but DAMN DO I LOVE IT. sokka having katara brings such an interesting dynamic to this fic. in the og twilight bella didnt have to keep secrets from anyone else than her father (and lets face it, even loving parents dont know shit about their tenagers) and her friends, which she had only met recently.

sokka is in a much, much more tricky situation w a sister who cares about him and his safety and also KNOWS him. damnnn. i’m very excited to see how this whole thing plays out & at what point katara figures shit out/sokka tells her

I HAD ALSO FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE PROM. WE ARE GOING TO SEE READ ABOUT SOKKA AND ZUKO AT THE PROM. WILL THEY WEAR MATCHING TIES/BOWTIES? WILL THEIR SLOWDANCE BE ENRAGINGLY CUTE?? I BET YES TO ALL OF THE ABOVE

MY SHIT EATING GRIN MATCHES AANG’S

aang is precious and i love him & suki is an asshole and i love her even more. also yue getting to do some teasing as well, being a dumb teenager like the rest of the group.... uggh, it makes me emotional. how i wish she would’ve lived in canon so we could’ve seen suki and yue ribbing sokka in canon too

aang and katara are so cute!!! some hets do deserve rights. also sokka and katara with the sibling solidarity again is beautiful

thE SMIRK. THE POUT. THE SERIOUS LOOK. THE TOUCHING. I’M !!!!!!!!!!!

YESS i DID remember!!! glitter zuko glitter zuko!!!!!!!!!

asdfghjkl i LOVE this piece of dialogue. PEAK COMEDY

i KNOW half of the things im saying are about katara and sokka’s relationship, but i just adore realistic sibling interactions. this is some good, good content

OH MY GOD. zuko, stop. i almost choked on my ice cream when i read this, he texts even worse than my grandma and i both hate it and love it asdfghj

look at sokka being a revolutionary bi, wearing flannel ON TOP of his hoodie

for some reason this line unlocked the memory of the “spider-monkey” line from the twilight film. asdfghjk. i dont know which i want more: that this fic has it or that it doesnt

OH SHIT. for some reason i had just assumed toph was going to take the alice role, mai the rosalie and haru the jasper. and i was kinda sad that oh no there’s not going to be an emmett. but i assume jasper is the one we’re ditching? good riddance southern boy aND MORE IMPORTANTLY, DOES THIS MEAN TOPH IS EMMETT? BC IF SO, I AM SO, SO FUCKING HAPPY AND ALSO I CANT BELIEVE MY DUMB ASSUMPTIONS WERE ROBBING ME OF THIS REALISATION

GLITTER ZUKO!!! *happy dance* also i’m in love w how zuko is awkward over his giller skin bc it’s weird & not w that ‘skin of a killer’ shit lmao

MY HEART IS SO SOFT FOR THESE FOOLS

sokka u smart, smart boy. i love u

*eye emoji* i have never in my life wished so hard that i could remember og twilight lines lmao. is this just a fact w no other meaning, or is zuko older than edward??

i ADORE this exchange so much i dont even have proper words for it. the wonderful + i was going to say stupid iS WHAT ROMANCE IS TO ME

i cant believe these idiots invented love

bruh. BRUHHH. BRUH. BRUH

bruhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i LOVE  this song

bruh,,,,

good GOD, WHAT A CHAPTER. look, i started reading this fic for the lolz and laughs - and it has those! this fic is SO MUCH FUN!!! - but it also has such beautifully stupidly cute romance now and im??? so soft and also dumbfounded. i am honestly just liking this fic very very much. also as i have said a billion times already, the sibling content is 5/5

so. thank u so much for yet another wonderful chapter, haley!! can’t wait for the next, to see those backgroud characters you’re talking about *eyes emoji* 

[zendozebra]

All the Time in the World Chapter 13

Midoriya was nervous. Sure, he wasn’t as nervous as he had been on his first date with Mina, but he was still a nervous creature. It runs in the family, if his mother was any indication. Every family has some sort of shared trait, like Asui’s bluntness and Kacchan’s temper. Even Kokiri-san told him that he gets his bad memory from his mother. But, he has to “tough it out”, as Kokiri-san would tell him. They leave for the training camp in just a few days, and he wouldn’t get much time to spend with Mina once they left. That meant this would be their last date before camp started, and they wouldn’t get to spend much time together between all of the training they’ll be doing.

Plus, Aizawa-sensei told the class that Kokiri-san won’t be joining the class during their time at the camp, so Izuku won’t have to worry about any tricks during his training. He’ll be able to focus and take his training seriously, instead of keeping an eye out for a flying fish that ends up smacking him in the face. While Kokiri-san laughs at him. Really hard, for like an hour. That day was really weird.

“Alright, I’m back! Hope you like strawberry!” Izuku smiled when Mina put down their milkshakes. This is a shake shop she’d been going to since she was younger, and probably knew the menu better than she knew her school schedule. She knew that he got anxious when he went to new places, so she’d offered to order for them while he found them a place to sit. She herself had gotten something called a grasshopper shake, which she seemed to like. He was happy with strawberry, but he was relieved that she hadn’t order something new and ended up not liking it.

“Oh no, we forgot to make a toast, dangit!” Mina yelled out, starting to frantically look around for something, anything to dedicate their meal to. That was one of her weird little habits, every meal needs to celebrate something. Their first dinner was dedicated to, obviously, their first dinner. Their second date, when they went out to lunch at a small cafe, was dedicated to that cute cat they passed on their way to the cafe. Izuku thought it was adorable, and he always played along because it was something small that made her happy, and he loved seeing that goofy smile on her face and her bright eyes whenever they clinked their glasses together.

“Oh, I got it! Cheers to Iida not-killing Majima-sensei!” That had been a hot topic at school after the exams were over. A few of the students from both classes had been watching the recordings of each exam, and that moment had been pretty popular amongst both 1-A and 1-B. Well, that, and Izuku and Kacchan’s defeat of All Might at the end of the exams. He remembered Iida feeling absolutely terrible after the exam, even though he’d passed with almost flying colors. His essentially lethal attack on their teacher docked them a few points. Iida thought it was a punishment given by Nezu, but Izuku thought it was probably Kokiri-san being bitter.

“Oh, hey, what do you think Majima-sensei is up to now? He couldn’t supervise our study session today because he said he was busy, but did he tell you what he was up to?”

“Oh, he said he wanted to meet up with an old friend of his, so they could gather some information for Nezu-sensei.”

XXXXXXXXXXXX

This ought to be easy. Just knock on the door and tell them you want to talk to the boss. He’s done it a thousand times, even a few with this boss in particular. True, that was back when Time Enough was one of the most wanted support villains. Man, the shit he helped to pull off were fuckin legendary. Maybe that was why Nezu set him up to this. He knew all about Majima’s past and all of the connections he used to have, so that’s what was probably going on. Plus, it’s a good thing he managed to find his old costume in his storage locker over in Osaka. It looked almost exactly the same as his hero costume, but with an oni mask instead of a bear, and he wore a red outfit underneath instead of black. It’s weird, he remembered this outfit looking much cooler when he was younger, but now it just looks kinda dumb. Oh god, he really is getting old, isn’t he?

Taking a deep breath, he knocked on the door, watching a slot open up at he saw a pair of red eyes. “What do you want?” Well that was rude, he’d have to get used to that again.

“I’m here to talk to Iwasaki. Tell ‘im Majima is here to see him.” That oughta work, not a whole lot of people forget him and his dumb bullshit. The guy closed the slot and didn’t come back for a few minutes.

“Boss doesn’t know anyone named Majima, get lost.” Excuse me, what? That’s not good.

“Son of a bitch. Tell him it's Time Enough, and he’ll let me in if he knows what’s good for him.” The man raised an eyebrow and closed the slot again. Seriously, it’s like his entire reputation just evaporated over the last 20 years. Sure, he was out of the game for a while, but all of the shit he’s done should be able to get him further than the front fucking door.

Said door was thrown open when Iwasaki himself appeared like a crazed madman, standing there with wide eyes. His breath was ragged, and he looked far older than when they’d last seen each other. He’d gained quite a bit of weight too, and he didn’t carry it well. Eugh. “Ma-Majima-sama. What are- You’re here?” There we go, that’s more like it. Seems like Iwasaki thinks he’s pissed him off, let’s roll with that.

“Well, I’m just going around, you know, visiting some old… Friends. I just came back from visiting Murata. It was a fun visit, very nice, he even had one of his guys waiting for me at the door, just to make sure I felt welcome.” There we go, the fat bastard took the hint and let him into the office, where his grunts were sitting around watching tv or playing cards. They weren’t villains, just your average small-time criminals, so he can imagine their confusion when their boss, blubbering like a fool, led a tall man into their base, dressed very obviously like a villain.

“If you’ll follow me, Time-sama, I can lead you to my office. We can discuss business as much as we want once we’re there. I have the whole room sound-proofed for our privacy.”

Instead of doing that, Majima grabbed a chair at one of the card tables, this one being used for blackjack. That’s good, he hadn’t played a set in years, let’s see if that old Majima luck could still come into play. “Nah, I’m not really concerned about privacy, we can talk here. I want to play.” He through some coins into the small pot at the center of the table, throwing a nod to the dealer, who took the hint and dealt him a hand. A glance from the corner of his eye showed him that Iwasaki grew even more nervous, but didn’t argue with him.

“What is it I can do for you, sir?”

“I’m looking for a broker, one who’s better than you or any of your guys, and you’re gonna point me in his direction. Once you do, I’ll put your lack of hospitality to the side, pretend like it never happened, and I’ll be on my merry way. Easy as that, I’m not asking for much.”

“Of course, sir, we can work out payment as soon as we find who you’r-”

“Hey, oh, woah, woah, hey, hold it right there. Payment? What exactly would I be paying you for?”

“Well, the standard fees for information collection, plus a price adjustment depending on who ex-”

“You seem to have forgotten just who exactly is in charge here, Iwasaki. Remind me, who gave you your first set of recruits? I had even given you some of my best men. I treated you very fairly, I thought, and when I stop by to check in on one of my favorite pet projects, you’re gonna tell me that I have to pay?”

“Sir, you told me that I have to charge everyone, no matter how high profile they are.” There was a beat of silence, about thirty seconds, where Majima just stared at Iwasaki from behind his demonic mask, before he slapped the man hard enough to knock his glasses to the ground. He cleared his throat, glancing around the room while Iwasaki picked up his glasses.

“I’m looking for a guy, goes by Giran, and you’re going to tell me where he is or I will rain hell on you for all of time. And no one you run to, be they heroes or villains, will be able to save you from me, not even that Watcher guy those UA chuckle-fucks have been trying to threaten me with.” Iwasaki gave him an odd look, one of confusion. Good, that’s what we’re going for. “The fuck is that face for, boy? You got a problem with me, you fuckin’ say it. We’re men here, now act like it.”

“I’m sorry sir, but I was under the impression that you were the Watcher.” Perfect, time to fix that shit mistake that Nezu made by posting his alias and quirk up on the official UA website.

“Excuse me?” Majima stood up, turning to Iwasaki and grabbing the man’s hair, slamming his head onto the blackjack table. The money pot tipped over, spilling coins and bills onto the table. Everyone in the room All of the goons watched this man brutalize their boss while he begged for forgiveness. “You really have forgotten who the fuck I am, boy. Time Enough is immortal, a fucking GOD, and there is no one who can ever be what I am, no matter what quirk they have, or how much they fucking try! You think you’re funny, a fucking comedian? Then get some better shit, boy, cause I’m not laughing buddy. Am I? AM I?!”

There we go, Iwasaki was now crying like a newborn, snot and tears were flowing from his face and onto the table, all of his men standing around him and freaking out. They watched their boss cry out as Majima ground his face into the table, but one of them seemed to have a bit more courage than the rest. He grabbed Majima from behind, going to throw this stranger off of his boss, but the time stopper did what he does before he got the chance. Majima walked around the room, checking everyone’s pockets until he found a switchblade, using it to cut the fool’s fingertips, keeping them small but deep. Then, he used the blade to carve ‘FOOL’ into the man’s forehead, snapping his fingers and watching the man double over from the sudden burst of pain.

Majima looked at the knife in his hand, wiping it off on his cloak and tossing it back to its owner, who was surprised when they realized it was theirs. He grabbed the back of Iwasaki’s jacket, dragging him out of the room and towards where he assumed his office was. He dropped him and moved behind the desk, sitting in the chair and folding his arms as he watched the disgusting excuse for a man pick himself up, staring cowardly up at the time stopper in front of him.

“Now, I believe that you were going to tell me where I can find Giran, ain’t that right?”

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Next chapter is going to have a ton of action, as well as reveal a lot of secrets and offer a ton of answers. I’ve been taking extra time to make sure that it is detailed, as well as easy to understand. As an aside, I have plans for future plots, but I wanted to ask a question- Would you like to see Majima take on an apprentice, and if so, who would you like him to train?

Also, an apology to Entomoid, because I completely forgot that Koda Koji was supposed to be a rock monster or something. His design tends to blend in with the six-armed Shoji and the pink-skinned Ashido. So, as an apology, a quick omake-

Majima’s neck was still stiff from Iida’s kick earlier, so he was trying to ignore the pain as he walked into his office. Seriously, why’d he have to go sober again? He’d kill for some vodka right about now. Maybe he could cheat, he might still have some smirnoff in his des-

“Oh, shit, what are you doing here? School’s over, kid, what’s keeping ya?” He didn’t mean to scare Koda, but the kid jumped almost 5 feet in the air, spinning around and flailing his arms around wildly. Wait, no, that was sign language, wasn’t it? The fuck was he saying, forgot bag? Oh, yeah, that reminds him.

“Your bag is under my desk, kid, I noticed that you left it here when the academic portions of your exams were over.” Koda gave him an odd look, before signing something to him.

‘You know sign?’

“Yeah, just a bit though. Ueno, the gun runner I talk about from time to time? He had a quirk that enhanced his hearing, which didn’t really mesh too well with all those guns he spent his time around. He went deaf about two years after I met him, and I worked with him long enough after that I picked up some bits here and there. The only sentence I know by heart is, ‘They got the money, go get the product.’ Saw that one almost every day, got used to it real quick.”

‘Is Ueno-san still a gunrunner, sensei?’

“Nah, he died about… I wanna say, 30 years ago? I visit his sons now and again, they keep his business running. Now here,” He threw Koda his bag, “Get out of my office, and congrats on passing the practicals. Yamada’s voice isn’t easily overcome. Oh, and good work on getting over that fear of bugs, those things aren’t too easy on the eyes.” Majima looked at his desk, waited a second, then stopped time. Now that he wouldn’t embarrass the kid, he looked over at Koda, seeing a small, proud smile on his face. That’s good, kid deserves the praise for this one. He snapped again, watching the kid leave before opening his wallet. He’s got a few bills, he’ll just settle for a soda from the vending machine down the hall.