#im deadasa in love.
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str4wb3rry-m1lksh4k3s · 2 years ago
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im so down bad rn
God the way they literally say ANYTHING to me just has me over here kicking my feet and giggling like a girl who got her crush to go with her to prom. They plague my mind at literally every moment throughout the day and THEY WERE IN MY DREAMS THE LAST FEW NIGHTS! Goodness i just want them to talk about anything that goes on in their silly little mind, and tell me about it. god they just rant about the shit their into and it has me in a literal fucking chokehold and makes me wanna commit vehicular manslaughter against orphans in the most loving way.
Me and them have been playing on VrChat together the past few days and its been so long since i genuinely felt this way about someone. They made me laugh so hard i sounded like a dying dolphin and holy shit i havent laughed like that IN TWO YEARS. They make mr so inexplicably happy whenever i get a notification from them on discord or instagram and the fact that [Runa] makes me so eager to get up in the morning and get ready is such a lovely feeling to have again. God, we havent known eachother or been dating for that long but just the thought of being able to call them mine makes me burst with elation and want to cry positively.
The way that they were so excited when a reference to Jurassic Park was made in The Tenth Floor: Part 2 filled my heart with so much joy i felt like i was going to explode. I just sat there with the dorkiest smile staring at their avatar, unable to do anything but agree with them as they got all happy. Good god, im positive this is love. Not the fake highschool love you do to get over someone, but one where you cherish the other person so much that it burns you to their core whenever they do anything and you just have to stop and admire their cute little goofy antics.
We have matching avatars in VrChat too which literally just adds fuel to the fire which is known as my heart in this case. The fact that they even wanted to spend time like that with me makes my heart ache. Everytime they reference something i told them in the past makes my knees feel like jello and my words get stuck in my throat. Nobody has ever made me feel this passionate about them before, and goodness gracious it kills me. Im on the edge of my seat whenever they start talking, and i never ever ever want that to change. One day i swear i will drive to their fucking house, despite living in different states, with as many gifts as i can possibly muster to bring. Ill give them my heart and soul.
But when I say this, I mean it fully. I would do anything for them. I want to have those childishly cheesy dates people envy. I would take them to every beautiful place and i severely want to make them feel so special about themself. If they were feeling sad i would bend over backwards just to get them feeling better, no matter the price. Goodness, i really really really just want the best for them. They deserve the world.
Me and them mainly talk on discord and the conversations we have fill my heart with so much admiration it kills me. One day I felt like I was dying mentally, and despite it being a big anniversary for them and their friend, they still checked in on me and wanted to make sure I was fine. Whenever we play games they make me freeze with how intelligent they are, and it makes me melt inside and i love that so much. Im literally crying as i write this because they make me feel so connected to this world. Ive always been disconnected and being able to feel complete again makes me so damn happy.
They never shame me for anything I say, and only tease lightly. We fit so well together, and I truly hope they feel that too. You make me so so happy, i genuinely hope you know that. Youve brightened up my life and im so thankful for that my nerdy tall ass hot sauce packet.
I love you so much Runa <3
- A.H.
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