#ill try again later 🚶

[winter-glaze]

anatomy and rendering are gonna be the death of me... ABSVDHBJK

[lorillee]

btw can you tell me about how that cat is an incel

AAAHGH i typed out this whole thing and then tumblr screwed it up and deleted everything. wailing and gnashing of teeth. but thats okay. ill explain it again. anyways to any of my 5 remaining warriors mutuals if you see this post and i got something wrong i apologize to be honest its been like a decade since ive read the books that encompass this whole mess. anyways. ive provided a helpful relationship map to give you some visualization and keep these people straight

ok. so tldr. sort of. actually not really but whatever. so basically brambleclaw is a special prophecy boy who gets a dream from the dead ancestors being like "ok you need to go 🚶💼🚗 on this journey 😤💥😎 and do some stuff 😌✨🌠" and brambleclaw is like "ok got it boss 🫡" and goes on his journey to do some stuff. its not relevant to the love drama. squirrelflight invites herself along and they end up becoming friends and later start dating. at some point after this brambleclaw starts striking up a relationship with his half-brother and squirrelflight is Not A Fan partially because his half-brother is Kinda Shady and partially because shes suspicious because of his dad, who is also brambleclaw's dad, who really sucked as a person.

so squirrelflight tells brambleclaw that he needs to stop hanging out with his half-brother, and brambleclaw gets mad and accuses her of suspecting him purely based on their dad (and if she doesnt trust the half-brother because of his dad, what does that say about their relationship etc etc). so they get into a whole fight about it and its a drama and they break up. in the aftermath squirrelflight starts hanging out with ashfur who is Just Some Guy and they start dating. meanwhile leafpool gets a dream from the dead ancestors thats like "ok so get this 👀🤯💥 squirrelflight and brambleclaw 😳👫💖 are like . totally destined to be together forever 😌✨🌠" and leafpool is like "ok got it boss 🫡" and tells squirrelflight. squirrelflight is like omg for real???? and tells brambleclaw and they get back together. ashfur fades into irrelevancy.

shortly before this, however. leafpool breaks off her illegal relationship (illegal because 1) shes a priestess and cant get married or have kids and 2) because the guy shes dating is from a rival clan) but later finds out - oops ! - shes pregnant. unfortunately this is now. a problem. in the meanwhile squirrelflight gets a dream from the dead ancestors thats like "okkkkk so like 😳😭😔 sorry to break this to you but ummmm 🤯💀🧍‍♂️ youre infertile 😌✨🌠" leafpool asks squirrelflight to take her babies and pretend that they are hers and brambleclaws and squirrelflight is like "got it boss 🫡". so squirrelflight lies to 1) the clan 2) the babies and 3) brambleclaw that they are hers and brambleclaw's children. no way thisll go wrong right 😎👍

so things go normally for a few years and everything is fine. then one day theres a huge storm after a drought or something i think and the entire forest catches on fire. squirrelflight is trying to get the kids out (they are adults now) and its a problem but hey look! ashfurs here to help! oh- oh wait whats . whats he doing ummmm. so basically ashfur says something to the extent of "you ruined my life i hate you so much im going to kill your kids in front of you to make you understand how i felt every single day" completely unprompted and squirrelflight is like "um. uhhhh ok well have fun with that because theyre not even my kids 👍" <- clearly last ditch effort to get ashfur to leave and ashfur is like "wait what for real? um. well okay bye then" and leaves.

one of the kids who is a massive stickler for The Warrior Code has 57 moments in a row though because she has just been alerted to the fact that she is an Illegal Baby and Should Not Exist and murders ashfur to prevent him from revealing the truth about them but then ends up having a Mental Illness Moment and tells everybody about leafpools illegal relationship babies at the monthly gathering of all the clans and runs off into a cave and fakes her death kind of. its a whole thing

[k0kichiimagines]

YEAH FSGHDFUGGD- I feel like this dude would want to learn even more languages or other shit just to mess with you 😭✋✋

HE MAKES UP FOR IT LATER BUT IT STILL DOESN'T CHANGE THE FACT THAT HE WOULD LAUGH HIS ASS OFF AT YOU LOSING IT and when you try speak to him, just seeing your confused face is enough to get him to wheeze/laugh even harder cuz you are so cute in his eyes-

SPEAKING OF KNOWING YOUR FIRST LANGUAGE (IF YOU HAVE ONE) you two would commit to ONLY speaking that during the chatrooms and EVEN ON PHONE CALLS WITH THE OTHER MEMBERS AND THEY LEAVE ONE BY ONE OR HANG UP SO CONFUSED-

And imagine y'all are preparing a party and when the day comes, he still speaks that same language to the other members with this SMILE ON HIS FACEEEEE

SAERAN (AND POSSIBLY VANDERWOOD) IS CRYING IN THE CORNER, LOOK AT THIS POOR BOI, HE WANTS O U T

Reminds me of that April fool's joke he did where he changed everything to Arabic, EVERYTHING- imagine him doing that with your first language HELPPPP

For me, Greek themed messenger sounds so fucking funNY-

I'm having so much fun with this idea and NONE OF Y'ALL CAN STOP ME MYAHAHA, I SHALL YEET RANDOM HEADCANONS LIKE DIS!!

Extra:

No one:

Not even a soul:

My cat's interest of scratching me after he starts washing himself: 🚶

WAAAIT HE CHANGED IT TO ARABIC? IM GONNA NEED HIM TO DO THAT AGAIN RQ FOR ME PLS IM BEGGING ILL PAY FOR IT 😭

BUT YES YOU TWO CAN SAY ANYTHING just have casual conversation, put them on edge because they dont know what youre saying, give them a lil scare, hes such a menace sometimes

saerans going to have a dictionary for every language at this point 😭 he'll be accidentally learning 300 languages with you two and your antics

CAT SCRATCHES H U R T MY CATS BITE ME CONSTANTLY PAIN