#ill still do a little more later but uhhh i gotta do something else before i do triple my usual workload in a day lol

[gothamcityneedsme]

ive done too much work today already lol

[nuclearnerves]

INCOMING VAMPIRE AU THOUGHTS

Don't mind me I'm finally getting the ideas I had on this shit out so I can actually go forward with developing it as an AU. It's my usual mixup of fps protags, Gordon Guy and John, but I'm starting with Gordon as the Vampire and Guy as the Vampire Hunter.

absolute beast of a wall of text under the cut

What If Being A Vampire Literally Sucks All The Time Forever like chronic pain sucks. like THAT level of sucks. Like Here's what I was thinking of. Being a vampire isn't just "being alive forever but you need to drink human blood" It's like Oh man I have some lore you look at vampires and their main thing is that they're blood suckers right so lets start with a corpse dead body. cadaver. no longer with us. just some rotting meat. The brain needs oxygen as fuel. The blood supplies the oxygen through blood. The blood is pumped through the heart. The blood is made by your bone marrow. You die. Your heart stops beating Blood stops pumping Brain no longer has oxygen to think marrow stops making blood thats standard! Now, becoming undead, as a vampire, is a little more complicated. The long and short of it is: your body is FIGHTING ACTIVELY to be alive against all odds and wins every time (immortality), but it hurts the whole way

I have the gist of it. It's like. Your heart stops. By all means, you should be dead. but the magic kicks in, and you're still thinking. Your brain is still sending signals to your muscles to move. But using what oxygen to move? whats burning in you? You don't know but you know it's just enough to get to your next meal. So you ferociously eat something, and then find you can't swallow. You can't make saliva. You barely have the energy to chew, and once you DO get something in your stomach, it immediately comes back up. Why can't you feel your pulse? What's going on? You're out of options so you figure you might as well just lie down and die. You're too tired to keep going anyway. So you do, you lie down, and you close your eyes, and you quietly hope that death is as peaceful as sleep. You realize you've actually been moving around without breathing, which makes sense because you can barely flex your diaphragm for more than a shaky wheeze. How are you thinking with such little oxygen? But as you fade from consciousness, you can feel something in you, and it's so upset, it's crying, it's filled with grief, and you instantly can tell it's your skeleton. It's your bones. You're distraught down to your marrow. You're dying. You're dying! Your heart stopped and you have no more blood! You need blood! You need blood to move! To breathe! To think! You try to breath deep again for the voices in your bones, trying to comfort them, to sooth them with the repetitive motion in your lungs, trying to fill yourself with anything but grief, but they keep wailing. We make the blood, our creation, our child, what we put all of our work into is gone! gone! gone! We need it back! Anything! All of it! Find it! Bring it back to us! We're hungry! WE'RE HUNGRY!

and once you find yourself too exhausted to listen, to think, how badly you wish just to die already to cease hearing this wailing, you find your body moving without you. And it's hungry and it's searching and it's crawling on all fours and it misses its beautiful red life that made it feel so full before and it needs it back, and the next thing you know you're desperately grabbing anything with blood in it and shoving it in your mouth in a desperate attempt to sooth this cry for life, you don't want to die, you don't want to die, you worked so hard to keep up this body and craft it and LIVE with it and you're not going to go, and even when you try, even when you try to lay down and die, your body refuses, it takes the reigns, and it keeps up the work itself with or without your help. And it's not until your stomach is full and your teeth are stained and you feel a pulsating burning in your bones that you snap back awake, completely conscious, just fine. You're lucid, you don't feel any more pain. Everything around you is dead and drained and messy and your heart still isn't beating. but you can breathe now and holy shit you guess you literally need to kill to survive and the less you eat and the more you starve yourself the worse it gets when your body finally decides to take recourse.

my idea was like. "the vampires curse is actually stored in the bones, thats why the teeth get so sharp and also theres a connection between blood and bones with the creation via bone marrow" its literally like i was sitting there thinking "no no no, whats it like to be a vampire. what neurosis would you develop. How would you panic? What are common mistakes beginner vampires make" which, by the way, gordon is a beginner vampire

so now you gotta factor, what blood lasts for how long? how long can you go between meals? not only that, but what creatures satisfy the urge? How long can you go avoiding human blood? Does it work like drugs where you develop a resistance to the high, or is it like food where it will keep you moving until you eat again? How the fuck are you gonna get your hands on blood? Can you just eat raw meat? Does that count? and thats where im at lol

OKAY now. now thoughts on beginning scenes of vampire au

So my idea was this Doomguy is a vampire hunter independent and one of his buds says that some freak scared and almost attacked his daughter when she got too close to his old abandoned laboratory up the hill and hes like “he might be… you know… a problem. if you needed a lead” and guys like yeah i fuckin hate the undead ill kill this dude so he busts into old lab space and sees so many dead animals its actually mostly Bones and pelt that hes seeing piles of feathers etc so hes like yeah this is all telltale signs of vampire uhhh hes introduced to gordon SOMEHOW im not totally sure of the details but the working idea i have is guy falls into a trap gordon devised that restrains him suspended in wire or something and gordon like. limps/stumbles into the room and this dude looks haggard he’s breathing heavy, his cheeks are hollow, he’s bug-eyed and shaking while looking at this massive wall of meat in his trap and he bares a bunch of hideous teeth and grits them and looks like hes really struggling with somethin... Like if these dudes don't know each other then Gordon might give in and try to drain Guy, and Guy would absolutely do anything in his power to turn this new vampire into ash, im thinking the inclusion if g-man as a coven leader can fix both issues.

i like the idea of guy falling into gordons trap and gordon thinking about what to do with him before gman shows up and whisks gordon away for a “meeting” while complimenting him on his good work catching the most feared vampire hunter in the country and gman just leaving guy suspended in wires that he has to fight his way out of. Instant situation defuser.

Guy ends up needing to take care of other monsters before going back to Gordon, and he DOES plan to go back to gordon, because no vampire is a good one, especially not one associated with the fucking head of a coven, but next time he sees Gordon, Gordon helps him out of a scrape by attacking and draining a combine who was going to take Guy out or something and escaping before Guy can catch him, or otherwise seeing Gordon do something good with his insane undead powers and like, the third time he meets up with him is when they can actually talk, and Gordons fuckin SO haggard, he’s not even fighting back and he’s even going as far as to say “just make sure theres nothing of me left when you’re done, I don’t want anyone else getting hurt”

Side Note: Guy has a bunch of scarring on his body from dealing with vampires, cops, ghosts, werewolves, anything violent that kills people. I'm playing with the inkling of an idea that he has Divine Blood in him, so that any time something undead bites him or tries to drink his blood, it burns. We'll see.

Side Note 2: now i really like the idea of the combine actually being an organized faction of vampire hunters that are WICKED crooked and exploit people for all their worth in exchange for their “safety” when they kill a vampire They’re essentially loansharks and Guy fucking hates them and hates the name theyve given to vampire hunting

Side Note 3: You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about John yet! He's in this too. His species is a surprise but I need to get to him later I have an idea for where he came from (Cortana too)

I still need a good reason for Guy to not instantly kill this vampire, if not it's just gonna be "Gordon Freeman escapes the countrys best vampire hunter like a seventh time" every time they meet and they end up being rivals. And it gives Guy enough time to look past the whole "undead monster" thing and start looking at the "Oh this dude figured out how to fight his ridiculous craving for blood in a way more humane than most and is actually staying out of peoples way and keeping to himself. Guess he's not that big of a threat but I still need to keep an eye on him in case he loses it. Turns out he's got a family (Probably Alyx, Eli, Issac and Barney) who's been lookin for him and cares about him as well, don't wanna hurt them". I like the idea of them ending up needing to team up to take out undead together.

And that's what I got so far!!!

[the-fiction-witch]

Play

TV SHOW: GODLESS  COUPLE: WHITEY X READER RATING: CUTE!!!!! + FLIRTY SMUT

"noooooo!" I cried "I don't want daddy to go to work, you promised you'd play tea party today" I whined tugging in my father's jacket "I'm sorry little dove I have to get down to work" he smiles fixing my bows when another worker man came up and spoke to him about something I didn't hear what "you do? Ohh perfect," he says to the man before turning back to me "now little dove, I have to get to work I'll be back at sundown, and in the meantime you can play with my friends son" he explained "Who?" I ask "Uhh Arthur? Where's your dam kid at!" He yells "He's here" the man from before answers a little across the way and my father took me over even if I hid behind him "aww such a pretty little thing" the man smiled to me "whitey for god sake come out and say hello" "No" a little voice answered behind him I giggled a little poking my head around my father's legs to see a little boy he looked the same age as me if alot talked hiding behind this man's legs he peaked his brown eyes out but saw me looking and disappeared behind this man in a little flash of dirty blonde hair it made me giggle so much sneaking out from behind my father around his man's legs but that whitey boy was clever he kept sneaking away from me the two of us almost playing hide and seek with each other using our fathers legs as hidding places till they laughed and moved so we couldn't hide "Go on then you two, well come home when work is done until then you two play together" the man offered "Go on then, y/n I'm sure whitey would love to come play tea party with you," my father suggested "And whitey I'm sure y/n would love to play cowboys with you," his father offered before the foreman called and they both rushed off giving us a wave as they went down into the mines for the day.

I hummed my little tune as I sat on the porch with my little wooden table and chairs and my porcelain tea set all set out for my dollies and stuffed animals with a spare chair on the other side empty as I sipped my tea kicking my little feet till I heard 'clip clip clop clip clop clip clip clop' coming down the main road of down so I stood and crossed my arms as I spotted whitey clip clopping his little wooden horse down the path till he reached the gate and basically parked his wooden horse before running up to the porch "your late" I told him "I'm sorry honey, I got held up at work" he says so I hummed and he sighed jumping up the first step of my porch and giving my cheek a kiss so I went and sat at the table pouring him some tea and giving him a cookie "How was work?" I ask "Fine" he shrugs "Fine?" I ask "Just fine honey" he shrugs "Don't lie to me whitey! I've seen you riding around with that missy girl" I said "Huuu! What are ya sayin' about me y/n!" "I saw you taking missy for a ride yesterday after work" "Maybe I wouldn't have to, ya haven't ridden with me for years!" "Huuu! Whitey! Don't talk that way around the children" I said covering my dolls ears "I'm sorry honey, I don't want to fight Infront of the children," he says getting up and gathering all my dollies and plushies putting them inside the house "why don't we go back? Ya can come 'nd ride with me all day?" He offers "Ohh whitey I don't know, it's been an long" I said "Or we could take buttercup up to the fields tonight just you and me? I'll take the day off work ya dad can look after the kids-" he explained "No were not dropping the kids on my father" I argue "Well I'm not takin' them all up to the feilds, besides it's way past there bed time" he says "Well they started up waiting for you" I yell "Ya should have put them to bed ya knew I was going to be late" he argues "You kids having fun playing house?" My father asked at the gate along with Arthur, whiteys dad "Daddy!" We both yelled running into the arms of our fathers "You two uhh... Play house funny" Arthur laughs "Why? It's how most houses are," whitey shrugs "Yeah" I giggled "Alright, well that's enough house for today" my father smiled carrying me in his arms to be stood in the porch as whitey got his horse "See you tomorrow Jacob" Arthur laughs "See ya Arthur, say bye-bye y/n" my father smiled "Bye-bye whitey" I giggled "Bye y/n, same time tomorrow" he smiled as he waved goodbye as he went off with his father.

"How ya doin' little lady?" whitey smirked as he arrived at my porch with his little wooden horse and wooden gun

"Later whitey" I sigh hugging my teddy bear

"come on please," he asks

"fine" I giggled putting my bear on the porch and ran down sitting on his little wooden horse and wrapping my arms around him and he rode the little horse along the la belle streets till we reached the dry goods man

"bang, bang bang!" whitey smiled shooting the dry goods man with his wooden gun

"Whitey fuck off and go home," The dry goods man says

"do you have any candy?" I ask

"you want candy you gotta pay for it," the dry goods man says

"come on y/n lets go" Whitey says as we hurried off

I giggled as whitey walked me home from the schoolhouse my father was already home sitting on the porch with his pipe watching whitey  closely as he been for a good while now since we were getting older and still spending as much time together "Hey uhh y/n, I was uhh wonderin' if maybe you'd wanna come down the river with me tomorrow, just me and you?" He offered

"aww sure whitey" I smiled giving his cheek a kiss making him blush hard wiping away my kiss "Ill see you in the morning" I smiled heading up my path to my father who was glaring at whitey as he wandered down to his own house

"whitey winn what are you up to?" I ask as I went over to the stables

"Ohh uhh nothin'," he shrugs

"are you... trying to play chess alone?" I ask

"No I'm playin' against myself" he shrugs

"don't you have anything else to do?" I ask

"Nope, not on shift watchin' the mine till tomorrow, bill says he doesn't need me trainin' today, house is clean and horses are done so..." he explained

"Ill play" I smiled putting my stuff down and sitting with him "what is this?" I ask after a while

"is what?" he asked

"this thing your growing on your mouth?" I ask

"don't it make me look older and more sophisticated?" He asks

"No" I answer "are you just doing this because you'll be deputy soon?" I ask

"How so?" He asks

"well, bill has some good facial hair, the requiring deputy did, marshal cook has great facial hair" I explain

"Maybe" He blushed as we plaid

"Hehehe, your such a silly boy whitey" I smiled giving his cheek a kiss making him blush hard "you don't wipe my kisses away anymore?" I ask

"Hu?" he asked having not been paying attention

"You always used to wipe away my kisses, you said I had cooties" I laugh

"cooties arent a real thin'" he laughs

"Says the boy convinced a monster was living in his closet until he was fourteen" i sigh

"there was a bobcat in there so i wasn't completely wron'" He shrugs

"aw whitey" I laugh getting up and giving his lips a little kiss and he froze "Hummm... keep it I kinda like it" I smile

"w-what?" He stuttered

"The stubble, its sexy" I smiled going back to work

"Yes mam" he nods

"Uhhh uuuhh Whitey" I muttered

"Shhhhh! you know the mine shaft goes all the way down y/n, don't want your dad to hear us?" He smirked as we were cuddling and kissing as whitey had a shift looking after the mine shaft elevator so w wherein the top hidden away having a little roll in the hay I giggled and pulled him back to kissing me which he happily didi putting his hand back up my dress and moving my hips onto his lap better i pulled him closer and he in turn pulled me closer too our kisses getting lustier and more passionate I pushed him down so his back hit the floor making him groan into our kiss before he flipped us over so I was under him we pulled away a moment so I could see to get us pants undone when

the loudest crashing noise I ever heard came from below us

"what was that?" I ask in a panic

[whoiskt]

Doing this year-end thing for me again

1: What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before?

Told a man I loved him, graduated college, said goodbye to a loved one, lived alone, gave a eulogy, was Maid of Honor, went to a bachelorette party, and saw my favorite band in concert!!

2: Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I forgot whatever my resolution was. Most likely I didn’t complete it then oof. Although there’s a strong possibility my resolution was just to survive the rest of senior year which was a valid resolution and I made it.

3: Did anyone close to you give birth?

No, but my other sister is married now. I’ve given up hope on my oldest sister, but there’s new hope now. Maybe soon I will be auntie.

4: Did anyone close to you die?

My grandma passed away from cancer at the end of May. I’m happy to know she’s not suffering anymore but I miss her. This is the first time I’ve had to deal with a loss like this.

5: What countries did you visit?

Still have never left the country. Furthermost I traveled this year was to the U.P.

6: What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019?

More money, less debt! Please, I need a real job ASAP!

7: What dates from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

May 30th because that’s when my grandma passed. November 15th because that’s when Erika was married!

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Graduating.

9: What was your biggest failure?

The hundred rejection emails I have for jobs in my inbox. Please employ me for your video production needs.

10: Did you suffer illness or injury?

No, but my allergies were really bad this year. For a while there I was having to take allergy meds everyday on schedule just to be able to breath. And I hate taking pills unless totally necessary.

11: What was the best thing you bought?

My graduation present to myself was my studio apartment. I know I didn’t buy it technically but living alone is an opportunity some people never get so paying the rent for no-pants-zone is best thing.

12: Whose behavior merited celebration?

I think mine deserves to be celebrated in the form of a job offer soon. Of course, I love all my friends and family who bring love into my life and make it worth living. My bf has been by my side through thick and thin this year and lord knows I’ve been depressed lately so I’m very thankful for him.

13: Whose behavior made you appalled?

If you might recall, my boyfriend’s friend group is all messed up right now from a huge cheating scandal. That’s a really long story but I think that was the wildest and worst thing of the year. So S/O to those snakes.

14: Where did most of your money go?

Tuition. Rent. Food. Where it always goes.

15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Love! Friendship! Vacation! Graduation! Being free!

16: What song will always remind you of 2019?

All I know is if I ever hear another Panera Playlist Song(tm) I’m gonna wreck whatever device is playing one of those songs. Seriously that place has made me hate “Big Yellow Taxi” which was previously a song I hadn’t heard in YEARS.

17: Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? Richer or poorer?

Sad to announce. Sadder. About the same. Poorer.

18: What do you wish you’d done more of?

Been successful in my endeavors. Be creative. Gotten something done so I had something to show for myself.

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?

Sit around and do nothing. Kept my feelings bottled up.

20: How did you spend Christmas?

Home with the family. There’s no where else to be. Although part of the family was missing, and Will didn’t show up until later... it was still a good Christmas!

21: Did you fall in love in 2019?

A little more each day

22: What was your favorite TV program?

Things I enjoyed this year: Bojack Horseman. The Good Place. Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure. Breaking Bad. Better Call Saul. Documentary Now! Madoka Magica. Death Parade. Doctor Stone. (yes my bf really conned me into watching all this anime) Tuca and Bertie. Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. A Series of Unfortunate Events.

23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I’m not much of a hater. Don’t have it in me.

24: What was the best book you read?

I’m gonna be real with you fam, haven’t been reading much this year :/

25: What was your greatest musical discovery?

Uhhh, Cosmo Sheldrake. Lizzo. Idk I’m not very good at following artists it’s more like a heard a few good songs.

26: What did you want and get?

Out of college. A studio apartment. Away from all the stuff about college that wasn’t actually college but still made me feel bad like the people around there and stuff.

27: What did you want and not get?

A MOTHERFUCKING START TO MY CAREER!!

28: What was your favorite film of this year?

I was so poor all year I didn’t see like any movies :’( And I’ve also been super depressed lately so my memory is failing as to what I even saw. You know, I liked “Us” a lot so I’ll just go with that.

29: What one thing that made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Knowing I don’t have to go back to school and soon I won’t have to live in this city anymore.

30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2018?

A poor person who has like 3 good outfits that are “looks” and just has to keep re-wearing them in different combinations.

31: What kept you sane?

I went insane this year. Honestly every now and then someone would just be really unexpectedly nice and kind to me and it would be like a slap in the face to me and I would feel better.

32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Man, I do not care about celebs.

33: What political issue stirred you the most?

This year? Climate change still. Also how fucked up Parking Enforcement and the local government is around here like I’m going to burn this place to the ground I hate it here so much and I’m POLITICIZING IT!!!

34: Who did you miss?

My grandma. My cat because she never comes out even when I come to visit.

35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019.

People be lying. 

36: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Only thing that’s coming to mind is “Oooh, I gotta get out of here.”

[dreammutual-remade]

high school!mark

request: highschool!mark if u love me plspls

 word count: 5.5k

a/n: lucky that I love u anon hehehehe !!!!! also wOW I didnt mean to make this so god damn long itS REALLY JUST THESE GOD DAMN HIGH SCHOOL AUS IM WEAK FOR THEM OKAY. look at this cutie hOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO RESIST

mark, renjun, jeno, donghyuck, jaemin, chenle, jisung

warnings: the usual intermittent cussing and probably an inappropriate joke or two

this au is my Ultimate Weakness it makes me soft as hell alright

………………….

LETS DIVE IN

okay so your mom has a job that forces your family to move around….. A LOT

and while you’ve gotten used to it for the most part it still sucks having to leave people behind and make completely new friends once every couple of years

this time you’re moving to a new school for your SENIOR YEAR and you’re livid

bc like ??? it’s senior year and you have exactly zero (0) friends since you’re new,,, yet again

you Threw A Fit when you found out but your mom was like shut up you ingrate soon you’ll be in college and won’t even have to worry about it

so you, an ingrate, shut up :/

you move in a month before school starts and the house is nice and your room is cute so that’s a plus !!!!!

you hang up some pictures and organize all your cute little trinkets you’ve collected over the years aw

you’ve even got a lil succulent garden growing on your windowsill

ITS CUTE AS HELL OKAY

alright so you’re gonna go explore around town because you , don’t know where anything is and you wanna find some good spots to hang

you take the bus into the middle of town because who tf is tryna drive themselves amirite ladies

support ur local bus driver

anywhom this isn’t a HUGE town but it’s one of those cute towns where you can pretty much walk anywhere you need to go

(god i wish that were me)

so you spend all day just, walkin

you find a library and pick up some books …….

both for decoration and reading okay

and you find a couple of restaurants and write them down to try later along with some coffee shops and whatnot

eventually you’re tired and prolly a lil sweaty bc it’s summer and you’re outside and ugh

so you find a nice big park and a tree and sit down at the base of it to read and mindlessly sketch things in the margins of your book

whEN OUT OF NOWHERE

someone shouts

“HEY WATCH OUT”

and you look up just in time to dodge a sOCCER BALL HURTLING TOWARDS YOUR FACE

it bounces off the tree and rolls a couple feet away

“uhhhh holy shit” - you

you just kind of sit there astonished for 5 seconds before you get up to get the ball and look around for who saved your LIFE

and there’s boy jogging toward you looking extremely embarrassed

you meet him halfway to hand him the ball and he’s like

“oh mY GOD i’m so sorry i told them to settle down but they never listen to me and jisung just ??? doesn’t know how to not take everything seriously and he lost and got pissed and kicked it and we didn’t even kNOW you were over here and also i’m so sorry”

you smile and tell him it’s fine and hand him the ball

you go to get back to your tree and he’s like hey uh you there uh wait up

god he’s awkward

and you turn around to face him with an expectant look

“so um, what’s your name? i haven’t seen you around here before and like in case i ever gotta make this up to you you know ??”

cute

you tell him your name and stick out your hand to shake and he grabs it very hesitantly and tells you his name is mark

he has , very warm hands and they’re only slightly bigger than yours but that’s still cUTE

MARK HAS BABY HANDS I DARE U TO SAY HE DOESNT

he says he hopes you enjoy your book and he’ll make sure the boys don’t disturb you anymore than they already have

you wave as he goes and he gives you a smile over his shoulder and his cheeks are tinged pink and wOw this boy is a cutie patootie

you go back to your reading but now instead of doodling you’re just writing his name or drawing his big doe eyes or his smooth hands

(((((let’s pretend we’re all good at drawing okay god knows i can’t do much more than a stick figure)))))

the boys leave after an hour or two and you leave pretty soon after then because the sun is setting and you gotta be home for dinner

basically your mom wants to make sure you aren’t kidnapped and/or lost in a new town

which, to be fair, is not that unlikely

you have your headphones in and you’re leaned against the bus window half asleep as you go

bitch wake up youRE GONNA MISS YOUR STOP

it’s the same bus driver who saw you get on and honestly there aren’t a lot of people on the bus so he makes sure you get off

“hey you, girl back there, hEY! this is your stop girly”

you thank him profusely and tip him because uhhhh u gotta get home and like Not Lost

you skip home with your bag of books and miscellaneous items you found at the thrift store!!!

you bought a little figurine of a dragon and she’s beautiful her name is saraphina because why not

that’s completely irrelevant i’m so sorry

i have ADHD

anywhom

you walk in and you’re all like hey momma !!! how goes it !!:3

and your mom is Sus™️ because why are you in such a good mood

and you’re like !!! cause i had a good day okay love u bye i’m going to my rOOM

don’t let her question anymore or else she’ll dig out that you met a Cute Boy

you go to your room and get out all your purchases and organize them while you still have the motivation to do so

and yeah

you use one of the blank notes to start like a lil drawing diary of sorts ???? like just to draw stuff in whenever you’re inspired or you see something pretty

and you definitely saw smth pretty today ;))))))))

hint: ITS MARK

you try to draw him from memory but it doesn’t look quite right and like :(((((( how sad is that what if you don’t even see him again

the rest of the month passes pretty quickly in the same fashion

by now you’ve befriended the bus driver and he tells you all the cool secret nooks and crannies of town for you to go find

he’s also your bff pretty much he always tells you about his daughter and all the cute things she does and you just talk about your life in general and he gives you advice

congrats you’ve unlocked Wise Uncle

he gives you directions to this teeny TINY flower shop where you befriend the old lady who works there by bringing a muffin everytime you go by

she trades you for a seasonal flower and makes a big deal out of tucking it behind your ear herself

basically you find all the cute old people in town and make them your friend because.

THATS CUTE

ADDED BONUS OF LIKE 17 PARENT FIGURES TO GIVE YOU ADVICE

this is accidentally straying into art hoe territory i hope y’all are okay w/ that

school is starting really soon and you’re nervous but also used to this so it doesn’t affect you as bad as normally

also you did meet some people so you aren’t going in with no friends but like, pretty close to no friends

on the first day of school you ride the bus and you see ???? mark ????? on your bus ????????

so you get on and do your daily greeting of the bus driver

his daughter lost her first tooth AW

you fake cry and he says “mood” and you lose it because you’re pushing internet culture onto this unsuspecting middle aged man skdkdkkd

you pat him on the shoulder as you walk back to find a seat but there are none because for some reason the bus is busy this early in the morning ????

you wouldn’t know lmao summer sleep schedule had you up at 10 at the earliest

so you go to stand and hold onto one of the poles in the center

(nearby our boy mark LEE)

mark looks up from his phone

these god damn millennials always on that damn phone

and he sees you and he’s like wHOA what’s up uhhh Soccer Ball Girl

and nice you remembered his name bUT HE DIDNT REMEMBER YOURS

but then he’s like nahhhh just kidding i remember ur name hey y/n !!!

you talk otw to school and find out you’re both seniors at the same school and how you’re excited for sports games and like, GRADUATING

mark keeps trying to offer you his seat but you refuse and he pouts everytime you say no :((((

good god just take the seat look at the sad baby boy :((((((((((((

there is an, occurrence

at one point the bus goes over a bump and you stumble a little and mark reaches up to catch you before you literally fall on him

his hands fly out and grab you by the hips to steady you since he’s sitting and you’re standing and he can’t exactly reach your shoulders sO YEA

or at least that’s his explanation in his head huehuehuehe

his hands linger for MAYBE 10 seconds before he whips them back into his pockets and blushes while you thank him

you: are also blushing

the bus driver: completely did that on purpose

when you get off the bus your Second Dad tells you good luck and pats you on the head and mark is like ???? do you know him

and you’re like yeah that’s my man maurice we’re buds

and he’s like ???? i’ve rode that bus all my life to school and i’m not buds with him wtf :/

“srry you’re not as lovable as me!! jealousy is a disease <3”

and he laughs his dorky laugh

you highkey are smiling so big because this boy is so cute and he’s walking close enough that your shoulders brush every once in a while and he has a silly laugh and AW

as you walk into the school marks group of Boys starts waving him over excitedly and he turns in their direction but then stops when he sees you aren’t following

“hey whatcha doin???”

“well uhhh those are Your Boys you know and i’m, i don’t, really, uh they don’t know me”

“aw cmon they’ll love you!!! look ill just introduce you and if they’re terrible and annoying you can leave”

“........ i gue-“

but he’s already grabbed your hand and is pulling you over to them

“sup fellas this is y/n and she just moved here this year so don’t be too overwhelming.”

the smaller one with the highish voice chimes in

“aww but overwhelming is my only setting”

“then just don’t be yourself, chenle”

“heYYY it’s that girl i almost killed in the park !!! so sorry about that by the way”

he introduces them to you one by one and they all shake your hand

jisung is the one with the big ass yaoi hands and also the one who almost ended your young life

jaemin is the one with pretty smile

jeno is the one with the squishy eyes

renjun is the Art Hoe of the group you can just tell

he’s wearing some got damn overalls you gotta befriend him immediately

donghyuck is the one with beautiful skin and a v high voice you’re highkey like hey but can you dROP THE SKINCARE ROUTINE and he’s like “i just wash my face every day xoxo :*”

you quickly learn who is a piece of shit and who isn’t

you figure out who has classes with you and then set off for the day !!

mark has gym and economics with you but those are after lunch :(((

he squeezes your shoulder before he leaves and says good luck though so you’ll survive

you have art with renjun first and this boy is your bestie already

he’s such a sarcastic shit and he too likes drawing random things and vandalizing school textbooks with artistically correct memes

he also has the AUDACITY

“so, you and mark already ;););)(;);)))”

“i uh don’t know what you mean by that”

“you SO do!!!!! you guys walked into school together everyone probably already thinks you’re a thing”

“oh shit really??? ah i feel so bad”

“is that a bad thing???”

“i mean yeah i’m not tryna Tarnish mark’s reputation”

“that is some self hatred bs he would be lucky to have you !!!!”

“renjun you don’t even know me that well yet”

“i know enOUGH”

you just uhh change the subject which renjun def notices but like

who cares

renjun apparently also goes to the same flower shop as you !!!

you find out because you see him drawing the front of it and you’re like heY i’ve been there my girl edna works there !!!!! she insist i call her grandma tho

and he’s all oh sHIT that’s my girl too !!!!!!

long story short edna is now your shared grandmother

now THAT is some uwu shit

you go about your day and it’s lunchtime and yOU uh don’t know where to sit :(

you see a girl that you met who works at the little coffee shop you like so you set off in her direction and you’re almost there when jeno and jaemin walk up and sling an arm around your shoulder from either side

“hEY BUDDY” -jeno

“SUP SQUIRT” -jaemin

and they start steering you in another direction towards their own table

“god of all nicknames you had to give me sQUIRT”

“yes it’s because you’re cute and small like squirtle”

“that’s a god damn reach if i’ve ever seen one but okay”

you get there and they practically TOSS you into the seat next to mark

he winces and gives you and apologetic pat on the back before starting the conversation

“alright so who actually did the summer reading”

as the table bursts into Absolute Ruckus you just kind of sit back and watch

mark notices you being quiet and while renjun and chenle are arm wrestling he leans over to quietly be like

“hey you doin okay over there? are they too much”

“oh not at all i’m just takin it in lmao”

“yeah that’s understandable. they’re easily the most entertaining group of people you’ll ever meet but also i’ve wanted to strangle every single one of them at least once”

“what are you 30??? you talk about them like you’re their mom”

“i mean someone’s gotta do it”

you and mark talk all throughout lunch and head to gym together since that’s next

exercising right after eating ??? sounds like a GREAT plan thanks so much public school system !!!!

you go to pull out your bag of gym clothes but ??? all you’ve got is shorts ?????

S H I T

you start whining because you’re like aWW i’m gonna get in trouble :(((((

and he’s like here i have like 12 shirts in here because i always bring too many and then leave some when i got soccer practice i gotchu

(he gives you the clean shirt that hasn’t been sitting in his locker <3333 what a guy)

you thank him proFUSELY and then go to the girls locker room to change

the shirt is too big and you don’t wanna look like a Bag so you tie a lil knot in it in the front

you don’t look like a thot tho you just look Cute As Fuck

some girl in the locker room lets you borrow a hair tie and off we go !!!

it’s the first day so everyone literally just stretches and sits around talking

you’ve hashtag LOST mark and you don’t have any friends yet so you’re just chillin talking to the girl who gave you a hair tie because she seems nice and you got nothin better to do

you’re explaining to her how to take care of a succulent /properly/ when mark catches a basketball that was headed right for you yelling a watch it !!!! over his shoulder

he turns to you and giggles a little, nudging your foot with his

“you’re just a danger magnet aren’t you”

“i mean danger is my middle name so”

“uGH get your ass over here away from all those freshman hoodlums who think they can play”

you wave bye to your friend because there’s literal fear in her eyes at the sight of mark ??

you ask her what’s wrong later and she’s like oh it’s not him i just have a crippling fear of boys

(that’s a mood)

you and mark pass a volleyball back and forth and fuck around pretty much all period

this is actually the one (1) sport he isn’t good at thank GOD you were worried he had no flaws

at the end of the class you ask him if he wants his shirt back and he says, and i quote,

“nah you and your thot knot can keep it, looks cuter on you anyways”

you smack his arm for calling you a thot but then thank him anyways for the shirt and for calling you cute :))))))))

econ passes the same way except normal clothing and no sports

although mark does throw a wadded up piece of paper on you that says u want 2 hang w the boys n me after school ? if yes then breathe if no do a backflip

this headass boy

you throw it back so it bounces off his forehead and then nod to confirm you will

you don’t have any of the boys in your last class and you don’t where to meet up so you just kind of loiter by your locker since jeno’s is pretty close to yours and maybe they’ll meet here ????

luckily jisung spots you and is like hey what r u doin here aren’t u hanging with us after school??? cmon

you follow him out to the parking lot where they’re all gathered around jeno and jaemins vehicles because apparently they’re the only ones with actual cars

rip

they start waving too excitedly when they see you and mark smiles all big

wooOOO baby boy already has a crush on you :3

they’ve apparently already decided to go to chenles house because apparently he’s fuckin loaded

you don’t believe that for a sECOND because he’s wearing crocs and an old ass polo shirt but

we’ll see

you mark and renjun ride with jaemin while the Babies ride with jeno since he is able to ignore them being crackheads in the backseat and drive his vehicle without crashing

apparently they’ve cause multiple vehicular accidents ??? possibly the reason renjun doesn’t have a car ???????

who knows

y’all have a blast in jaemins car tho playing tokyo drift from the third fast and furious movie if u haven’t heard that shit plEASE GO LISTEN WHAT A SONG HEHEHHEHHEHE

you pull into this BIG ASS house and you’re like no fucking way dude

and everyone else in the car simultaneously says

“i know right ???”

y’all pull in and go inside and it’s real nice holy SHIT

chenle comes in cackling followed closely be jisung and more sedately by jeno who looks ready to fckin die

you pat him on the shoulder and go you did well, soldier

he salutes solemnly before breaking out into the smile

y’all know the one

you UWU right there on the spot but hold yourself back from poking his cheek and cooing

chenle then SCREECHES and yells

“WHO IS TRYNA PLAY JUST DANCE”

and everyone crowds into his living room

somehow the couch is big enough to fit all of you comfortably that’s fckin impressive

you play just dance for 3 whole ass hours and now you’re Tired and Ready To Go Home

there’s a bus stop nearby and you insist upon walking since jaemin already have you a ride here and you didn’t even have gas money to give him :(((

mark goes to since you have to catch the same bus

you hum as you skip around the sidewalk and he walks behind you smiling fondly while you twirl around

he recognizes the song and whistles along and wow !!!!

Harmony™️

when you get to the stop you’re like 5 mins early

so to entertain yourselves you play rock paper scissors and each time the winner gets to flick the loser on the forehead

mark is a sweet boy so he flicks softly but you go all out

wouldn’t be surprised if he had a bruise tmrw girly u need to chill

you sit on the bus together when it arrives since there’s actually room now and he slumps down low until his head is pretty much rested on your shoulder

(our man maurice sees and is like GET IT GIRL but only so you notice and you make threatening hand motions at him)

you’re not sure if he’s asleep so you stay extra still just in case

and no one needs to know you rested your cheek on top of his head

but when it gets to your stop you’re like mark? mark lee??? mork ???? wake up ??? and you nudge him a little with your shoulder and he sits up and rubs his eyes aW

he slow blinks at you and goes

“hm?”

and you’re like i uh gotta go now

and he’s like :/// okay i’ll see you tomorrow and stands up and gives you a half hug before you go

maurice is DYING in the front you’re going to kill him

you walk home with a smile on your face and again your mom is suspicious of your good mood but you’re like aw it’s nothin just had a good day at school made lots of friends !!!!!!

as summer turns into fall you make more friends but you mostly hang out with the boys because they’re funny and nice to you and also Mark is there and we love our boy

you guys all attend football games together and go absolutely ALL OUT for whatever the theme is

for example: the theme was halloween and you all dressed as god damn SMURFS

it was legendary there was not one bit of you all that wasn’t covered in blue paint

jisung almost fought some girl who thought he was from the movie Avatar until everyone was like jisung cHILL OUT ITS NOT HER FAULT YOURE VERY TALL AND COMPLETELY BLUE

and well

can’t argue with that

it gets chillier though so you all bring blankets and cuddle most of the games

all of the boys suspiciously aren’t cold at first until you and mark share a blanket

they’re so obvious GOD

with each time y’all share you get more relaxed around each other until eventually mark has one arm slung around you and your legs are hooked over one of his thighs while y’all Snuggle

renjun waggles his eyebrows at you every five minutes and you discreetly give him the finger every time

little ASSHOLE

college applications are due like. right now

you all apply to a nice university close by as a backup/safe place and then apply to more brazy places just to see if you can get in

everyone’s been real stressed lately so you’re like !!!!! hey imma throw a friendsgiving party !!! yeehaw !!!!!!!!!

and you invite all of them over

“everyone bring smth and i’ll bake a ham or smth,,, i swear to GOD if all of you show up with store-bought pumpkin pie. i will kill you and then myself”

“what’s with you and pumpkin pie?”

“jUST. don’t”

((((srry i’m projecting my hatred of pumpkin pie onto u reader heheehehheh))))

everyone comes over and it’s really chilly so you have a fire in the fireplace and you have a couple of your gal pals over too

your mom is nice enough to leave y’all alone for the night and she’s not hurt since it’s not real thanksgiving

we stan moms

you bring out the ham and someone has brought green beans and mark ,,,, tHAT ANGEL he brought cornbread stuffing do y’all know what i’m talking abt

OOO THAT STUFF IS GOOD

and there’s sweet potatoes and apple pie and all the Thanksgiving Essentials

jisung wanted to be a dick so he brought cranberry jelly

“why don’t you have some:) cranberry preserves:) , jisung” -you, every 30 seconds

everyone sits down to eat and it’s LOUD so you’re like shut UP !!!!!!!!!!

“every1 say smth ur thankful for :3333”

“my family !!!!”

“you guys <3”

“awW BOOO” - everyone, while throwing things at jaemin

“my life !!”

“that i’m happy”

“gay” -chenle

“minecraft”

anyways no one took it seriously until it got to mark

“i’m grateful y/n moved here :))))))”

everyone goes KSKDDIDI and you blush and you’re like okay ily mark JSKKD

everyone EATS A LOT and then you go sit in a pile in the living room

you go to make hot chocolate for everyone and when you come back it’s , interesting how there’s only room for you next to mark . hm

you pass out the hot chocolate and everyone reaches Maximum Sleepytime

at this point you’re too tired to give a fuck and you just flop onto the couch next to mark and curl up into his side

he puts his arm around you to pull you close and this mf presses a tiny barely there kiss to your temple

you look up and like talk with your eyes

did u just

i did

oh

yeah

and then you just settle back down

it’s too crowded in here for any Moves to be Made

bUT YALL BEST BELIEVE WHEN ALL THESE YOUNGINS GET OUT UR HOUSE

you’ve got the karate kid on bc ??? who doesn’t love the karate kid and all of your cutie friends are asleep in various places

but once it gets super late you start waking people up and going hey i love you but your mom called mine like 8 times you gotta gO

you make sure everyone is awake fully if they’re driving and to text you when they got home safe

at long last

you’re alone

in your house

with mark

actually where is mark

mark has disappeared ?????

you start looking around for him and find him in your room ???

“you snoopin thru my things ??!?!??”

he jumps and is like uHH but you’re like nah you’re fine idc

so he continues and he was really just lookin at what kind of books you have and the little drawings and paintings and knick knacks everywhere

you just sit on your bed and observe him

let’s be real he’s nice to look at and you’d be perfectly fine doing this for uhhh the rest of your life

he pulls a book off your shelf and starts flipping through it until he pauses at a page

and his face blooms into this big smile and he looks hella giddy

and you’re like uhh hey whatcha lookin at there bud

and he just keep smiling and it’s a little smug now wtf

“when were you reading this?”

“oh uh i don’t know i got it this summer at that cute little bookshop”

“was it, by chance, the day we met?”

“i mean maybe??? why ????”

and he shows you the page and it’s tHAT oNE WHERE YOU WERE DOODLING BITS OF HIM AND WRITING HIS NAME ALL OVER IT

FUCK !!!!!!!

you immediately turn tomato red and snatch the book in to hold it tightly to your chest

“uhhh i do that with uhhhh eVerYONE I MEET”

“aw i thought i was special:((((”

he’s creeping closer to you this whole time until he’s INCHES AWAY

he gently pulls the book out of your hands and places it aside before grabbing your wrists and uncrossing your arms

“personally, i think it’s really cute”

you blush even more this man knows what he’s doing

you mumble a thanks with your eyes trained on his fuzzy socks what a dork

he releases one of your wrists to push your chin up so he can look you in the eyes

“do you really do that with everyone you meet?”

“,,,,,,, no it’s just you”

“alright cool”

and then he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you close til you’re pressed together chest to chest AW

he nudges his nose against yours and you close your eyes because your god daMN HEART IS POUNDING AND YOU CANT LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THOSE BIG PUPPY EYES

he presses the sweetest and gentlest of kisses to each cheek and then to the top of your nose

he presses one last lingering kiss on your forehead before he tilts his chin down to press your lips together

it’s so soft and innocent wow i’m going to SHED TEARS WRITING THIS

and he pulls away and you press your face into his neck in embarrassment

he chuckles a lil and rubs your back, leaning his cheek against your head

“hey, you down there”

you say “yeah?” but your voice is muffled by his neck and it’s more like eh ???

“my girlfriend y/n will you be ???”

what the fuck

you pull your head back so you can look at his face which is turning steadily redder

“uh what”

“shIT uh i meant will you uh bemygirlfriend”

your confused expression turns into a shit eating grin and you’re like

“what was that :)))) i didn’t hear you :)))))”

he groans and rests his forehead on your shoulder and pitifully whines out

“please be my girlfriend :(((((“

you pick his face up and hold it between your palms and he pouts playfully

“well how could i say no to that face”

and you smooch him right on those lil pouted lips

“yes i’ll be your girlfriend”

he smiles real big and smooshes you against him aw

wow so now you’re mark lee’s gf

LUCKY BITCH

lowkey you get a few threats but as soon as mark catches wind of that he stands on the statue in front of the school and announces that if anyone has a problem with you they’ve got a problem with him !!!!

and he looks like: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

you drag him down while apologizing to everyone in the general vicinity

mark is. veRY CLINGY NOW

i mean no complaints here it’s just

wow

you’ll be standing at your locker when BAM mark is wrapped around you from behind and you get a hey baby how’s ur day right in your ear

in gym class he restrains himself since the coaches are always like LEE KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF

but he always whines after and is like

:((((( but you look so cute in my shirt i wanna squish you

whenever mark comes over you force him to let you draw him at least once

each time it gets easier since you’ve started to memorize the details of his face and the knuckles of his hands and the shape of his shoulders

a lot of times he just comes over to watch movies and talk

he’s not an eloquent guy

(“you all look like pretty grass :)))” - mark lee)

but he gets what he needs to say out and he enjoys listening to you talk about whatever’s on your mind

you’ve started a glow in the dark star sticker collection to put on your ceiling and each time he comes over you put a constellation up there

so you’ll lay in bed and turn off the lights and just stare at the ceiling and try to name them all

soon you’ll just get sleepy though and press your face into his chest

he uwu’s every time :((((

after he’s done being astonished by his Baby™️ he’ll wrap his arms around you and stroke a hand up and down your spine wow

Real Relaxation Hours

your mom will come home and find y’all asleep and then SHE uwu’s and it’s just one big cute MESS

he loves to kiss you right as he’s leaving like he’ll lay one on you then RUN to the bus stop

p.s. maurice is on y’all every day saying he called it AY

his other favorite kisses are when he catches you off guard and just turns you around and kisses you and you’re like

I’m Confused But I Like This

lots of sweet pecks throughout the day and then longer slower stuff when you’re home and alone and relaxing

leaves hickeys on your neck literally just to be annoying

it’s oKAY THO DONT TELL HIM YOU LIKE IT

months pass and youve said your first “i love you’s” to each other and renjun is always like so when y’all gettin married huh

you both SMACK him simultaneously

but lowkey you would marry mark he’s the best and you love him so wHY NOT

but it’s early and you know that and you’re happy with what you have now :))))))

pls love and support our hardworking baby mark lee he is doing his best and i love him goodnight

[agentmarymargaretskitz]

Repercussions of Time Drift

Sequel to Five Years after numerous requests for more. 

AO3

As soon as the anachronism was corrected, Ray dove forward to hug Sara and Leonard. “You’re not dead!”

“Nope,” Sara shook her head as she returned the hug. “Still very alive.”

“We missed you too, Raymond,” Leonard admitted. “Now can you let us go?”

“Sorry,” Ray released them. “It’s been a while and we all thought you two were, well, dead.”

“It was only a week,” Mick muttered as he greeted the formerly lost teammates. “You gotta stop making me think you’re dead.”

“I would if I could stop these things from happening to me,” Leonard replied. “And it’s only been a week for you all? Sara and I have spent five years here.”

“Five years?” Ray repeated.

“Yeah, Ray,” Sara nodded. “Since you all left us in 1906 when the quake happened.”

“Pretty got the times wrong,” Mick stated sullenly. “Your comms went down and we had to make a call.”

“Gideon detected the block you were on suffered extreme damage,” Ray explained as they began to walk back to the Waverider. “All of us didn’t want to admit it, but it seemed too likely that you were both dead. So we pulled out and went back to the temporal zone. It took us a few days to get up the courage to tell Mr. Lance and Lisa, then we went back to anachronism duty.”

Sara sighed. “Well, this won’t be the first time Dad’s found out I’m back from the dead.”

“Same goes for my sister,” Leonard added.

“They’ll be happy to see you though,” Ray said positively. “And so will the others when they see you alive.”

“You aren’t on a tight schedule, are you?” Sara asked. “Because Len and I have to deal with some things here.”

“Like what?” Mick scoffed. “You two put down roots or something?”

Sara looked to Leonard. Neither Ray nor Mick seemed to have noticed the wedding rings yet. She couldn’t help but wonder how much longer it would take before they did. Whenever they did, another hug from Ray was certain to follow.

“Something like that,” Leonard replied.

Sara nodded. “We need to clear out our apartment. We’ve been here for five years. Some things hold...sentimental value.”

Ray grinned happily. “Don’t worry. We’ll just borrow the jumpship and get you there.”

Leonard held up the photograph from their wedding day. “Probably should show this to the team after telling them we got hitched.”

“It’d be just enough shock value tell them we’re husband and wife,” Sara replied as she closed her suitcase. “I can’t believe we’re actually going to see everyone again. It took a lot longer though this time.”

“Thought we’d be spending the rest of our lives here,” Leonard remarked as he wrapped the wedding photo up and placed it in his own suitcase. Everything they wanted to bring back to the Waverider was within the two cases. Mick and Ray were pawning off everything else. As far as the other tenants were concerned, a long lost relative had died and the Snarts were moving out to be with the remaining family. As cliche as it was, it did work.

“It’s back to life before the quake now,” Sara said, smiling a little.

Leonard look back up at her. “How much back to normal though?”

“What do you mean?” Sara shrugged. “Same old, same old. Saving the world, jumping about time, dealing with the team.”

“And us?”

Leonard remembered the days of Ray and Kendra. He’d known it was doomed from the start, although those two getting time displaced had been unexpected. Rip had explained time drift to them all before. Even though he and Sara were very different from the Boy Scout and Bird Girl, Leonard couldn’t help but worry that the happiness they’d found was going to slip away.

But Sara shook her head. “We’ll still be together. There’s a reason I said yes, Len.”

“That wasn’t because of time drift, I hope.”

“Absolutely not,” Sara reached over and took his left hand. “I loved you before we were even stranded. These five years have been the equivalent of getting shut in a closet together. It finally got us to more than me and you. I’ll just be your captain now as well as your wife.”

“I couldn’t have asked for a better one,” Leonard replied.

“Wife or captain?”

He smirked. “Both.”

Sara leaned over and kissed him. “Good. Now, ready to break the news to everyone?”

“I’m even ready to tell your father. Wonder how he’ll take to finding out his youngest daughter married Captain Cold?”

“Ooo,” Sara hummed as she picked up her suitcase. “How about I make sure to reiterate that you’re a hero now?”

“We’re home!” Leonard drawled out as Sara entered the bridge with him, both were back to their normal twenty-first century clothing.

Amaya grinned. “Ray really wasn’t kidding.”

“You doubted me?” the man frowned.

“All we had was your word, buddy,” Nate said, patting him on the back. “It seemed like they were dead until you actually brought them back here.”

Leonard snorted. “Clearly you had a lot of faith this week.”

“The situation seemed unlikely for you two to have survived,” Stein said as he approached them. “Clearly, we were mistaken. I think we should all know by now that nothing can keep either of you down.”

“Good to see you too, Professor,” Leonard said, shaking his hand.

Sara smiled at them before intercepting a hug from Jax. She laughed as she rocked her little brother back and forth. In the five years she’d been gone, she missed him so much.

“So were you captain while I was away?” she inquired.

“Grey nominated me himself,” Jax told her proudly. “But I’m giving it right back to you.”

“He did a wonderful job,” Amaya complimented as she came forward and Leonard and Nate had an awkward greeting. “I’ve missed having you around though.”

Sara hugged her as well. “I’ve missed you too, girl.”

Jax’s eyes widened suddenly. “Uhhh Sara? What’s on your finger?”

“Ah,” Sara held up her hand so they could see it better.

“When did you get married?” Amaya asked.

“What?” Ray shouted, perking up.

“She ain’t the only one,” Mick eyed his partner’s hand. “How come you didn’t say anything earlier?”

Leonard started to smirk. “You never asked. We were waiting to see who would notice first.”

“Wow,” Ray marveled. “Mazel tov.”

“My sentiments exactly,” Stein nodded in agreement.

“Huh,” Nate looked between them. “The last time we saw you two, you were dancing around each other. Now it’s been a week and you’re married.”

“A week for you, but five years for us,” Sara said. “It wasn’t smooth sailing to get to this point, but it’s worth it.”

“We should have a party for you two,” Ray suggested excitedly. “A really late wedding reception.”

“That’s a great idea,” Amaya agreed.

Before Sara could respond, Gideon chimed in from above. “As joyous as you all are at the return of the captain and Mr. Snart, I would like to perform a medical scan on both to make sure neither of them are bringing back any illnesses or diseases from 1911.”

Nate shrugged. “She’s got a point, especially since you were living in the city.”

“It wouldn’t hurt though,” Sara decided. “Len?”

He nodded. “She’s not going to find anything. We made sure to be as santiatary as we could there.”

“We’ll come with you guys,” Amaya said. “You can tell us everything that happened to you while you were stranded.”

“You gotta tell me how many banks you knocked off,” Mick pleaded to Leonard. “Was it easy?”

“I lost count,” Leonard replied with a shrug. “But I wound up working as a banker after I came back to Sara.”

“You were a banker?” Jax squawked.

Mick shook his head. “Can’t believe you just said that, Boss.”

“No trace of infectious diseases, and all harmful bacteria acquired from the era you’ve been living in have been obliterated.”

“Thanks, Gideon,” Leonard said as he rose from the chair. “You’re a lot better than the doctors in the city.”

“Naturally,” was the AI’s response as Sara took his place in the chair.

“So,” Ray grinned. “What was the wedding like?”

“Small,” Leonard told him.

“We had a few friends over,” Sara elaborated. “It was nothing fancy. We have a photo of us that I can grab right now.”

“I haven’t finished my scan yet,” Gideon protested as Sara climbed out of the chair.

“It’ll be super quick!” Sara promised as she took off out of the room. “I just have to get it out of a suitcase. It’s not like I’ll drop dead between now and a few minutes later.

Gideon gave an exasperated sigh, or at least as exasperated as an AI could sound. “Very well then, Captain. But you still need to complete your medical scan.”

“And I will,” Sara promised. “Be back in a few.”

Leonard couldn’t help but smile at her antics. She’d been feeling a little off in the past few weeks. It hadn’t helped that she had been working harder at the department store lately so her hours wouldn’t be cut back. Since they’d gone on vacation and found the team, Sara had started to seem better.

“Here!” Sara called out as she returned a few minutes later and handed Leonard the frame. “See, Gideon? Not dead.”

“How fortunate. Now please take a seat and let me complete the medical scan.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Sara muttered as she sat back down.

Amaya looked over at the picture and smiled. “You two look really happy in this.”

“Thank you.”

“Whoa, wait a second,” Jax took the frame out of Leonard’s hands. “Is Snart actually smiling in that?”

Ray leaned over to get a look at the photo. “Hey, you’re right!”

“Snart smiling?” You’ve got to be,” Nate stopped dead. “Shut the front door!”

“‘course he’s smiling,” Mick scoffed. “He just married one of the most badass women alive.”

“I agree with Mr. Rory,” Stein said. “Not just that, but he married the woman he loves.”

Leonard gazed over at Sara and shook his head in amusement. For a bunch of misfits who hadn’t noticed they were married, they sure could pick up on something small so quickly.

Sara was starting to get impatient. She’d been in the chair nearly twice as long as Leonard had. However, Gideon had not yet given her the all clear. It made no sense why she was being kept for so long. She’d come into contact with almost everything as Leonard had, but he’d gotten out quicker.

“Is everything okay, Gideon?” she asked as the others continued to discuss the wedding photo.

“Just verifying something,” the AI answered. “But the scan is nearly complete.”

Leonard narrowed his eyes. “Gideon, Sara isn’t sick, is she?”

Sara’s heart beat a little faster until Gideon replied that no, Sara was completely healthy.

“Well then,” Sara sat up. “So I’m free to go with nothing to worry about?”

“Yes and no. There is something that you need to know, Captain Lance.”

“Snart,” Sara corrected. “It’s Snart now.”

“She decided to go traditional,” Leonard added.

Jax raised his eyebrows. “You’re married to Captain Cold AND you took his last name? Anything else we need to know about?”

“Yes,” Gideon interrupted. “Congratulations, Captain Snart. You’re pregnant.”

Everyone in the room went quiet. Slowly, Sara lowered herself back down onto the chair.

“What did you say, Gideon?” she questioned, softly.

“You’re pregnant,” Gideon repeated. “There are elevated levels of HCG present in your body. You’re just over eight weeks along.”

No one in the room still said a word, but all of them were staring at her or Leonard. Her husband had a stunned look on his face as his eyes dropped down to her stomach. Sara followed his gaze. The early nineteen hundreds were certainly not the same as the twenty-first century when it came to birth control, although they’d stopping bothering so much with it after officially tying the knot. However, they hadn’t been actively trying for a kid. At least she now knew why she’d been feeling so off lately.

“Congratulations?” Ray offered finally.

“Thanks,” Sara murmured, still processing that there was a tiny human product growing inside her now.

Leonard started to smile. The smile told Sara that he was okay with this new, unexpected development. That was good news because even though this was freaking her out, there was also a small growing bubble of happiness.

“I guess we had more surprises for you guys than we thought,” Sara told them.

Leonard turned to Mick. “So how do you feel about becoming an uncle?”

[keyofjetwolf]

Jet Wolf Summarizes Act 40

The manga and I kind of hate each other. This is unfortunate, but still, I’m determined to come out of this with something. Rather than spend energy on a liveblog that’s increasingly negative, I’m reading each manga act (mostly) silently, and then writing up summaries at the end. I won’t pull my punches. There’s going to be criticism and snark about the manga, either wholesale or in details. If that isn’t a thing you feel like reading, please skip this post!

Mercury is in the title, so I am of course immediately suspicious. She doesn’t actually show up until thirty-five pages in. I’m SUPER suspicious. But I get ahead of myself.

First we have to deal with Mamoru in the hospital, where he regrettably regains consciousness. The Senshi run in like they’re a) concerned, and b) were notified, both of which we know are patently untrue. So since Ami isn’t with them, I’m going to assume she had one jello shot too many and passed out. At which point Mako hefted her up piggyback and ran all the way to the hospital like a charging bull, drunkenly barreling down the street and mowing down all passersby while Minako kept pace in her wake despite drinking more than anyone, making ambulance siren sounds and also carrying Rei piggyback style who made it a point to scream at everyone to get out of the fucking way and turn and nearly but never quite fall and yell at anyone who had the gall to not possess her precognitive abilities and ALREADY be out of the way, which meant, not coincidentally, that she was yelling at literally fucking everybody.

Unfortunately the manga didn’t have that, it had this.

Yet another wasted opportunity, manga.

They get an eyeful of bodyswapped Usagi and Chibs, and conclude that Black Lady’s back, which I’m sure wouldn’t have traumatized Chibi-Usa in any way. Talk talk, recounting last issue, Ami enters! MERCURY DREAM!

Oh, not yet, she was just late, despite the Senshi otherwise all consistently arriving at the same time always. She says they should get Usagi and Chibs checked out, and she called her mother to look at Mamoru, too. Speaking of, Ami’s mum enters. She looks, creatively, exactly like an older Ami.

I guess hairstyles are hereditary after all. NOW YOU KNOW.

Ami’s mum finds nothing wrong with Usagi and Chibs, and I can only assume that includes the fact that Chibs is a sixteen year-old girl impossibly squeezed into a ten-year old’s clothes, SERIOUSLY WHY DON’T USAGI AND CHIBS AT LEAST EXCHANGE OUTFITS CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW UNCOMFORTABLE CHIBI-USA IS

I MEAN THE UNDERWEAR ALONE NOT TO MENTION WITH THE SKIRT SITUATION

SHE’S WEARING SUSPENDERS WITH NO BRA YOU GUYS COME ON SOMEONE PLEASE GET THIS CHILD ACTUAL FITTING CLOTHING

Anyway, Usagi and Chibs are medically fine, but Mamoru has “shadows over the lungs”, which is apparently so unusual that the doctor “has never seen anything like it”, and I’m just sitting here UHHH MAYBE GET THIS GUY AN ONCOLOGY REFERRAL RATHER THAN LET HIM WALK OUT WITH A VAGUE PROMISE TO SCHEDULE A FOLLOW-UP SOMETIME MAYBE

Of course this is probably the same hospital that let Mamoru walk out with a ten year old child for whom he has no parental or legal guardianship and despite her suffering from cardiac arrest and no blood flow, SO CLEARLY I AM EXPECTING TOO MUCH OF THE MEDICAL STAFF HERE AT FUCK YOU HOSPITAL.

Chibs decides to try and trick Ikuko, so she goes home and pitches Luna-P at her. It works! I can’t even be surprised. She goes up to Usagi’s room, and rather than, I dunno, CHANGE CLOTHES, she thinks about how Mamoru said she was pretty and ughhhghgh. The Pegabell accidentally falls and instantly summons him, and someone really needs to tell Pegasus to let the phone ring a couple times because desperaaaate.

Pegasus says he can sense this is a bad spell cast on her by “someone”, but he refuses to answer any other questions, proving that no matter the continuity, Pegasus will never be helpful and needs to fuck off.

“I won’t tell you anything at all whatsoever, not about me or the enemy you’re risking your life to fight, but trust me, okay? PS: GIVE US YOUR POWER PRECIOUS”

One thing I will say is that Chibs immediately is like “I GOTTA TELL EVERYONE PEGASUS SHOWED UP AGAIN”, so while this is super jacked up, it’s not SuperS jacked up, so I can avoid screaming about everyone neglecting Chibs while she’s being secretly groomed by a fucking magical ungulate, and yes, I WILL take my small mercies.

Meanwhile, Usagi’s hanging out with Mamoru, who is intensely weirded out by the fact that Usagi is now a child, which I have to say that I was more than a little concerned about given the Chibi-Usa stuff.

Hm, this is twice in a row the manga’s not exceeded my expectations in a negative way.

OH GOD SOMETHING HORRIBLE IS COMING ISN’T IT

Well certainly Mamoru angst is coming, and jesus fucking wept. “I’M SICK I’M DRAGGING YOU DOWN PERHAPS WE SHOULDN’T HAVE A FUTURE TOGETHER”. And while fundamentally I’m fine with this conclusion, dude, you’ve been ill like A DAY, maybe take some Nyquil and calm your shit. And while I could maybe appreciate this from a flipping of stereotypes to have Mamoru the one so uncertain and worried, given how EVERY OTHER FUCKING PAGE OF THIS MANGA is about lifting Mamoru up and making him critically important, it reads less like a reversal and more Takeuchi grasping at a reason so she personally Usagi can remind us how wonderful he is. These plagues of doubt only work if something ever happened for him to be doubtful ABOUT.

Anyway, Chibs walks in and sees them (specifically she sees ten year old Usagi kissing an unconscious Mamoru but I can’t you guys I’m so tired) and she has a thought.

A THOUGHT I KIND OF FEEL YOU SHOULD HAVE HAD BY NOW CHIBS I MUST BE HONEST WITH YOU

She thinks about how her dream is to become an amazing lady and meet her own prince, and then we cut to Pegasus and then I threw up everywhere. BUT JUST IN CASE YOU NEEDED A PARALLEL TO DRIVE THE POINT FURTHER HOME, Pegasus is thinktalking to Mamoru and apologizing for not protecting him, because they’re trading positions now you see like Usagi and Chibi-Usa with the bodyswap and blaaarg. I much preferred all this last arc, when Mamoru was like “Huh I feel like I just married Chibs and Hotaru, THAT WAS WEIRD.”

Meanwhile at Ami’s house – YES AMI ACTUALLY APPEARS OVER THIRTY PAGES LATER – she’s up late doing research on the Dead Moon Circus. She pauses for a moment to have a really nice flashback with Pluto:

Sweet, huh? ONLY IT’S NOT A FLASHBACK IT’S A BRAND NEW SCENE AND WHAT’S MORE IT’S A BRAND NEW SCENE THAT DOES NOT FIT WITH WHAT WE JUST READ LAST FUCKING ARC.

You guys know me. You know I fucking LIVE for Senshi moments. But the Outers spent THE ENTIRETY OF LAST ARC actively avoiding the Inners. THAT WAS LITERALLY A PLOT POINT. You can’t work so hard to sell them as separate teams unable or unwilling to come together until the climactic final moments of the final battle and then turn around and pretend that Ami and Pluto were hanging out every weekend trading cool links and writing Perl applets. And it can’t have happened after, because as soon as they learned they’d gotten a baby out of the deal, the Outers fucked off before the dust had even settled.

I realize I should just be happy I’m getting anything at this point, but I’m ACTIVELY IRRITATED that this is being painted as something that was there all along when you know and I know that Takeuchi hasn’t been able to scrounge up two fucks to rub together about the Senshi before this point, let alone them interacting in any capacity that didn’t have Usagi at its center. OWN YOUR TERRIBLE DECISIONS DON’T STARVE ME AND THEN ACT LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SERVING ME STEAK DINNERS FOR THE PAST SEVEN MONTHS

Not to mention how it makes exactly zero sense for Ami to be all wistfully missing Pluto.

WHEN DID YOU EVER AMI WHEN DID YOU LITERALLY EVER

Which brings us to Part Two (through fucking Ten, I’m so angry) of why this pisses me off: it attributes whatever accomplishments Ami has had to this point TO A MENTORSHIP THAT LITERALLY NEVER EXISTED UNTIL THIS MOMENT. This Act is ostensibly about Ami learning to trust and believe in herself and blah blah blah THESE ARE NOT PROBLEMS MANGA AMI HAS BEEN WRESTLING WITH. Manga Ami hasn’t been wrestling with ANY problems, because Manga Ami has all the characterization of my partially-filled Papa Murphy’s punch card. But at least she could own whatever tiny moments of achievement she managed scrap together for herself out of this dismal fucking story that barely remembers she exists. BUT NO. Now she has to be smacked back five steps just to watch her walk back to where she started and call it development.

Jesus fucking WEPT I hate the manga.

All right, let’s blast through the rest of this since it means literally nothing. Ami begins to feel ~a stirring~ or whatever, prepping for her end of episode power-up. Her mum finally comes home at 1am and laments that she’s not a very good mother, but seems to make no actual effort by the end of the story to change that, so yeah, I guess you are. Ami zones out partway through to tell us about her father, who was an artist who fucked off to paint fish or something.

Blah blah bad guys, blah blah Fish Eye and PallaPalla will go after Ami because they’re blue.

Next day, Ami goes for a walk and spontaneously buys a fish, as you do.

Oh no it’s really Fish Eye, who could possibly have foreseen this?! As Ami falls asleep, she begins to have a nightmare where her mum brings a new man home and disowns her. Then she becomes her younger self, and her dad doesn’t want her either. Then she sees Usagi, Mamoru, and Chibs (though bodyswapped as they currently are, wtf Ami) and imagines Usagi saying that when she’s with them, she doesn’t need anyone else.

Not a single bit of this I feel is unreasonable for Ami to be really worried about, I have to say, but since no part of this has come up before now and no part of it will come up again (PARTICULARLY LOOKING AT YOU, NIGHTMARE USAGI), it has all the staying power of a foot cramp I had once, inconvenient and a little painful in the moment, but over and forgotten five minutes later.

Ami realizes none of it is real and tries to break free, only to fall through a mirror and begin talking to herself, only tiny.

Tiny Ami says Bigger Ami should remember her real dreams and not give up. “Yes, there are so many people I love and who love me”, she says, LITERALLY THINKING OF ONLY SEVEN PEOPLE TWO OF WHICH ARE HER PARENTS BECAUSE REMEMBER WHEN AMI HAD TO USE NARU SHE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A SINGLE TERTIARY ACQUAINTANCE WE CAN PRETEND SHE CARES ABOUT

My favourite part of this though?

IT’S A SHITTY LIST AND MAMORU’S STILL NOT ON IT

Ami goes on to say that her real dream is to become a “full-fledged soldier” (okay) and protect everyone. This triggers her power-up, and also a talking doohickey.

I can’t help but notice we’ve increased our talking inanimate objects by about 500% lately, and I’m wondering if Takeuchi was on massive amounts of painkillers.

I wish I were on massive amounts of painkillers.

“Mercury Aqua Rhapsody”, Ami breaks the mirror, and frees her mum from the nightmare. But she apparently still can’t actually do anything of real combat importance, SURE AM GLAD YOU’RE A FULL-FLEDGED SOLDIER NOW AMI. It takes Chibs and Usagi running in (Ami called Usagi earlier) and transforming – triggering the end of their bodyswap – to attack and kill Fish Eye.

Because Usagi and Chibi-Usa are here, the story is instantly handed back to them. Usagi’s awesome awesomeness is just so bloody awesome that Chibs is like “Oh man, I must not be this Princess who can help Pegasus, it’s probably Usagi.” So she calls and tells him he’s got it wrong, to which he’s “Oh? Weird, but okay. So heyyyyy, other Princess, s’up?” Which upsets Chibs and she runs off.

KEEP RUNNING CHIBI-USA

KEEP RUNNING AND NEVER LOOK BACK