#ill probably remake them and post them as is just to not hold on promises tho so sorry for those anons if theyre seeing this

[nana2009]

not sure if you still like okegom or are taking requests but could you draw yandere idate obsessed with rock or shirogane :333

helloo! yes i still like okegom, im just not that obsessed with it anemonemore (_ _') u kno how new hyperfixations go....

but i still very much enjoy yandere >:3

[wygolvillage]

been thinking about how i would make a remake/reimagining of simons quest. long post ahead. might be a little stupid since im no game designer or writer or anything lol

random gameplay stuff

it would be metroidvania style, but not all in the castle. imagine it like ooe but the map is interconnected.

i would keep the day/night cycle but it would be less obnoxious of course... probably there would be a little clock on the HUD showing what time it is and how close you are to nightfall. villagers would go inside during the night, but you can still enter churches. churches are your most reliable healing method since save rooms would be pretty sparse in the rest of the world map, and saving at the churches also allows you to skip straight to morning or nightfall if you so desire. being stuck in the middle of the woods during night can be disastrous if the player is ill-prepared since monsters grow stronger then.

there would still be puzzles to figure out and complete, and it would still be a bit cryptic (not to the degree of the original of course), but there is a supporting character i would put in who you can ask for hints at any time, and hers are a lot more straightforward (more on her later). important items are gained through quests rather than bought with hearts, but drop rates would be VERY forgiving since it’s required. like, a villager promises to give you the red crystal if you can get him some fish meat from a merman, which would have about a 40% drop rate... i kind of wanted to preserve the sense of fighting monsters to forage for materials the original has without making the game a total grindfest :P

additionally, materials dropped from monsters can be used to craft food items after simon teams up with the aforementioned supporting character. like i said before, save rooms wouldn’t be super common so it would be implemented as a way to heal yourself when you’re away from town.

the bosses would be decently difficult to compensate with there being very few of them- a true challenge, but they can be beaten with both playable characters if the player is skilled enough

the plot would be expanded upon as well so lemme give a little summary

it begins in simons house where he wakes up having trouble breathing. he’s been struggling with some physical illness ever since battling dracula years prior, especially a nasty bite on his arm he sustained during the fight, and that arm has been turning a pretty nasty shade of grey, like its wasting away. he goes outside to a graveyard near a local church to try and get some fresh air, but it is largely unhelpful. suddenly, he spots an old woman standing at one of the graves. he looks over at him and says mysteriously “ah... must be a horrible night for a curse.” simon is like “what do you mean?!” the old woman tells him to “resurrect him and destroy what remains, or nothing will remain of you”. she then disappears into thin air, implying she’s a ghost or something equally spooky. simon is like “destroy what remains... dracula’s remains?!”

the game starts properly in the graveyard and surrounding forest as simon heads in a fairly straight path towards the town of jova, where he meets a woman a few years younger than him named agnes. agnes’ parents were killed by dracula’s forces when he was resurrected back then, and she admires simon greatly for defeating the dark lord (shes also implied to be a descendant of grant danasty!). she decides to accompany him on his quest after hearing about his curse. he asks the head priest of the town if he knows about dracula’s remains, and the priest tells him that he heard of some of dracula’s followers placing some of dracula’s body parts in their strongholds to worship, and points him to the direction of the first stronghold and hands him a stake. he also warns them that bringing all of his remains together can resurrect the dark lord and it holds a remarkable corrupting power.

simon and agnes then become a character swapping duo (just like portrait of ruin hehehe). agnes is low on defense but can deal plenty of damage at a close range, and her signature weapon is the golden knife. she’s fast as well, whereas simon is more of a slow, defensive character who is best at keeping distance between himself and the enemy. agnes is smart, but impulsive and stubborn, and doesn’t like being told that she’s wrong. simon is a stoic but kind individual who tends to keep to himself. their personalities occasionally cause conflict between them during the adventure, but they eventually grow to become really good friends.

eventually they reach berkeley mansion, the first of the strongholds, and its aesthetic is very much “dark evil church”. there are the usual skeletons and bats and stuff, but some of the dracula followers are regular enemies as well. the first boss is a human who has dedicated his life to following dracula (specifically to contrast against the priest dude who gave simon the stake and directions) who uses magic attacks and stuff. beating him earns simon dracula’s rib, which functions suprisingly well as a shield (which becomes important later).

the adventure continues on like this, going from town to mansion to town, with simons curse becoming more and more hindering to him (from a story perspective not a gameplay one. simon wont become worse to play as because that would be lame as hell). they go to the other mansions, with the bosses being carmilla (guarding the nail of vlad, in a mansion thats very much a vampires lair), olrox (guarding the eyeball, in a massive dining hall themed mansion) death (guarding vlads ring in a Spooky Clockwork Skeleton Mansion with slogras and gaibons and all the usual death stuff), and in the final mansion... there is no boss. just as simon is about to grab the heart, agnes stops him.

Agnes: You told me you were going to destroy the remains, weren’t you?

Simon: Of... Of course, Agnes. Why do you ask?

Agnes: Why haven’t you?

Simon: ...

Agnes: We have almost all of them. You remember what the priest said, right? That bringing them together can resurrect Dracula.

Simon: Well... I haven’t exactly been truthful, Agnes. The old woman who sent me on this quest didn’t tell me just to destroy his remains...

Agnes: So you’ve been intending to resurrect the Dark Lord this whole time? For your own selfish gain?

Simon: This curse will kill me if I don’t.

Agnes: ...So it’s true, then. You’re willing to risk the lives of thousands just to save your own skin. Lives like my parents’... Lives like mine.

Simon: I...

Agnes: There’s no need to explain yourself, oh great hero, Simon Belmont. (Scoffs) If you care more for yourself than anyone else, strike me down now!

surprise! simon has to fight against his best friend! tbh i would be pissed at him too lmao. and it’s a tough fight, as agnes can deal a ton of damage and is hard to dodge. killing her like any other boss will give you the bad ending, where simon realizes she was right and lets himself succumb to the curse out of guilt for her death. the way to the good ending is to use dracula’s rib as a shield (i told you it would be important!) or dodge/survive her attacks until she tires out (the shield is the best method though), and realizes simon doesn’t want to hurt her. they have a touching emotional moment and simon assures her that he beat dracula before and can do it again, but he will need her help. agnes nods, and they head to the ruins of dracula’s old castle, which is totally empty. there’s no music, while the rest of the game has been filled with catchy tunes, here there’s only ambient noise.

they reach the throne room and place drac’s remains on a pedestal, where they begin to glow with dark energy. blood is dripping down the walls and stuff, and the count is returning to the mortal plane as thunder booms in the background. simon begins to doubt himself. if he loses now, the world will be plunged into darkness, and it will all be his fault. but... agnes has his back, despite everything. they fight dracula together, and though it’s tough with simon’s weakened body, they eventually prevail, as simon drives the stake into his heart, the curse finally lifted.

the game ends with agnes and simon returning to jova. agnes admits that she’s still upset with simon for lying to her, but she would be even more upset if he died slowly because of her. simon sighs, stating that there was no easy solution to the situation they were in, and asks for forgiveness for breaking her trust and risking so much for his own desires. agnes says maybe one day she will forgive him completely, and she still considers him a friend, but she needs some time to herself. simon nods, and they go their separate ways.

SO YEAH idk if this is even good but i hope u at least enjoyed reading it. maybe ill make designs for this version of simon, and for agnes too ofc :D

...yeah, not exactly the happiest ending, but i always found it kind of weird that simon was so willing to resurrect the count to save himself from the curse, so that’s the main conflict i decided to add to the story. its not the sort of conflict that can be easily resolved. theres no easy answer... agnes was right about simon risking other peoples lives being wrong, but she was also wrong to insist that he just give up and let the curse kill him instead. its Complicated idk... Castlevania II: Simon’s Trolley Problem

edit: actually i decided there would be two "true endings" after using the shield in the agnes fight. the one i described, and a second one where they decide against resurrecting dracula and simon lives out the short rest of his days with agnes until he dies of the curse. both endings are considered equally canon and valid

[deadmandairyland]

I’m watching reviews of the Resident Evil 3 remake. From what I’ve seen so far, general consensus seems to be that it’s good, but not as good as the RE2 remake, and probably not worth buying at full price. One common criticism was that they left out a bunch of stuff the original had. From what I heard, they pretty much cut out puzzles from the game (and to be fair it’s kinda silly that an entire city would require solving the soup cans to get through), which I think might be the reason why iconic locations like the clock tower were cut. But that’s still a shame because while I haven’t played the game myself yet I cannot imagine this game without the clock tower. But I’ll reserve my judgment for when I play the game myself, which I probably will eventually, if only because I have a big collection of RE games on my PS4 that is distinctively missing a 3 and it’s bugging the hell out of me.

But since I’ve already seen comments about this remake possibly being a step backward compared to the RE2 remake, I feel like now is a good time to make a post that I wanted to make for a while but didn’t really have the motivation to make until now. Because while I wasn’t as hyped about an RE3 remake as everyone else was, I couldn’t deny that I wanted it to happen... because then it would mean that there might even be a Code: Veronica remake, which was an idea I was actually more excited for.

Though I do love RE3, Code: Veronica holds a special place in my heart. It is what first got me interested in the horror genre as a whole. At the time I was--and, let’s face it, I still am--a bit squeamish, so horror didn’t really interest me until I--not even joking--looked up the IMDB page of one of the voice actors from a cartoon I was into at the time and found out he had a role in a Resident Evil game, and I looked up clips from it, and I saw this cutscene and I was like “Wow, I really like this.” ...And no, not because of the naked woman, I promise you.

But enough about all that. This post is already getting long and I haven’t even gotten to what this post is about: I want to share what I would like to see in a Code: Veronica remake.

(I’ll try to keep this brief)

First off, one thing that the RE2 remake was highly praised for was how streamlined everything was. The layout of the police station made a bit more logical sense (adding stairs in the main hall helped) and placement of items was done in such a way that backtracking didn’t feel like as much of a chore. I feel like this last bit is especially important because if there’s one thing Code: Veronica is criticized for, it’s how ridiculous the backtracking is... and I have to agree. Now, granted, I do like some of the ideas CV threw around--the metal detector and the optional stuff like running back to the solitary cell to give Rodrigo medicine come to mind--but there were times where the mandatory backtracking got in the way of the story being told and I think that’s the main reason why I want to see a remake of this game.

Because think about it. In the first RE game, what is everything leading up to? What do all the files and backstory of the game lead you toward? The laboratory under the mansion, right? Same with RE2: everything in the game leads up to the laboratory. Now to be fair these are endgame areas, so backtracking out of them would be kinda silly anyway, but I’m not bringing them up because they’re endgame areas. These locations are built up to through the plot and the files you find throughout the game. Imagine if after you reached the laboratory in RE1, you found a key that you needed to unlock a door all the way back in the guardhouse, and you had to do all sorts of other shit before you could finish the laboratory. Even if it wasn’t the final area of the game, having to backtrack out of it when there’s so much build up for it would ruin the flow of the game, right? So let it be clear that this is not an endgame issue, but rather a story flow issue:

Once you reach the private residence, you should never have to backtrack to another location on Rockfort Island.

Now, granted, the developers had enough foresight to realize that once you reach a certain area in the Ashfords’ mansion and hear this song, you are no longer required to go anywhere else on the island until it’s about to explode, because they knew that going back to bumfuck elsewhere at this point would have really killed the downward spiral Claire has become unfortunate enough to get caught up in. However, I feel like they didn’t go far enough with it. I personally feel that as soon as you walk through the front doors and hear THIS song, you should never have to go back to the prison or unlock anymore rooms in the palace! That should all be over and done with by this point! Because like the laboratories in previous games, every file, every cutscene, every fucked up thing you see in the prison, literally everything up until that point in the game is building up to this fucking house and the secrets within. It should be a point of no return up until the place starts to fucking explode.

Second, either make Chris’s segment of the game shorter or give him someone to interact with. That’s the unfortunate thing about Chris’s portion of Code: Veronica. Say what you will about Steve and Alfred, but at least Claire is interacting with them regularly throughout her portion of the game. Cutscenes can do wonders with breaking up monotony; without them, the game’s basically just all fetch quests. Honestly, while I do think it’s a shame that Chris only got one chapter in Darkside Chronicles, I understand why he was only give the one chapter: the meat of the story happens in Claire’s segment of the game. That being said, I do hope they would consider going with the second option before the first. There are characters Chris interacts with in the game; he just doesn’t interact with them enough. Wesker is more of a behind-the-scenes villain than Alfred, and Alexia sadly doesn’t really do much. Giving both villains more to do would greatly enhance Chris’s part of the story.

Now that the gameplay stuff is out of the way, it’s time to address the elephant in the room: Alfred. Honestly, I have no idea how they would portray Alfred in today’s political climate. I don’t really want them to hold back with him, because he’s basically a walking homage to classic horror villain tropes and he has the potential to be a very serious and dangerous villain, but I get the feeling that no matter what Capcom decides to do with him, either they’ll get a lot of backlash for transphobia or making the mentally ill look like Hitler, or they’ll get a lot of backlash for pandering to SJWs and making light of prison camps by pulling back their punches with the original Korekiyo Shinguji. I don’t know, maybe I’m overthinking things, but I’ve been on Tumblr for a long time and I’ve seen some crazy shit on here (and Twitter... and YouTube... and 4chan... especially 4chan) over the years, so I can see literally any of these scenarios happening. Personally, though, I do hope their portrayal of him (including how the other characters view him) is closer to the Darkside Chronicles version than the Code: Veronica version, if only because I’d rather the protagonists feel bad for him than be like “Man, I know you’ve murdered a ton of people and might have a thing for your sister, but God forbid you crossdress, I mean that shit’s just fucking weird.” Yeah, that was pretty bad, not gonna lie.

Well, so much for keeping it brief. But that’s basically all I can think of off the top of my head for what I would like to see in a Code: Veronica remake. That and being able to see Rockfort Island in all its fucked up glory in fabulous HD and with a free camera, that’s be sweet.

[blondecarfucker]

Ocean Eyes (Roger Taylor)

Roger Taylor x Reader

BoRhap!Roger Taylor x Reader

Fic Summary: You're new in town and a blue-eyed boy caught your attention. You grow up to be best friends, but the possibility of being more is always haunting the two of you. Reader is also an art student who draws Roger constantly.

Fic Note: So I wrote this for @yourealegendfred's 3k words song inspired challenge. I have been trying to write this for a while now, but the story was missing a middle part, and that's where @pigfish27 comes in with a beautiful request that was already very similar to my idea for the fic (with the reader being very artistic and such), and honestly, don't know how I'd write this without her idea, so thank you!! Thank you too for the challenge and song inspo, yourealegendfred. I chose this song because 1) I like Billie Eilish 2) Roger's eyes are very hypnotic. If it's your first time here, hi! I adore Roger Taylor and I write a lot about him, including a long ass, 17 parts at the moment, fanfic, so my masterlist is in my bio! Can't link it here or else Tumblr will avoid showing the post on the tags.

Words: Nearly 4000

Warnings: a bit of angst in the beggining, SMUT, unprotected sex (it's not the 70s anymore kids, you know you should wrap it before you tap it), recreational use of drugs (that's up to you, but like, we all know it's the right thing to say "kid's, don't do it", so i'm saying it now). that are probably some minor errors cause im super sleepy

Ocean Eyes - Billie Eilish

I've been watching you

For some time

You remember the first time you saw Roger. You just moved to a new city, your 15th city in your 14 years, and you just got to school. Your mom promised you'd stop moving, but you didn't really believe her. You had no reason to.

So you got there, your school uniform ill fitting, and as you said goodbye to your mom in the car, you saw him. His hair was longer than the rest of the boys, his uniform shirt was creased, the first buttons open, his tie undone.

You watched him step on a cigarette butt on the ground as he held another one between his fingers. You couldn't believe how blue his eyes were behind all the smoke around his face.

Not only in color. He was joking with his friends, and you could hear them laughing, but he looked sad, his eyes unable to hide how blue he really was.

You recognized those eyes. Eyes like that looked right back at you every time you looked in the mirror.

He looked back into your eyes, too.

Can't stop staring

At those oceans eyes

But you only spoke for the first time in detention. You didn't knew why was he there; you got caught sleeping in bio again. You were drawing, trying to make time go by faster, when a hand pressed against your table. It was big in comparison to yours, and you noticed how callous it looked. You looked up and was met with his eyes.

"Could you borrow me a pencil?", he said, a smirk on his lips.

"Sure", you told him, and gave him one.

"What are you doing?", he said, as he sat back into his chair, scribbling something in a piece of paper in front of him.

"I'm drawing", you said. You only realised you sketched his hand a few minutes later. You looked at him, watching as he wrote something in the piece of paper. The word "drowse" covered the paper.

"Are you really drawing? Or are you watching me?", he said, aggressive after realizing you read what he wrote, moving the paper away from you. His eyes stared into yours. Angry.

"I can do both. I'm drawing you", you snapped back, and he looked surprised that you weren't intimidated by him. He smirked. "Do you want me to pose?", he asked. "Just look at me", you told him, sketching his eyes.

Burning cities

And napalm skies

Fifteen flares inside those ocean eyes

Your ocean eyes

You drew him a lot. He used to call himself your muse. You drew him drumming, his eyes narrowed at the effort. You drew him when he had his arms wrapped around some girl at a party.

You grew closer together, bonding over how you disliked that town. You couldn't believe this was the city that your mom settled on. Roger and you would complain about that as you shared a blunt on the side of the river behind your school, the sound of the running water muffling your complaints.

He liked how you never seemed uncomfortable around him, even when he was being cocky, and you liked how honest he was around you, never treating you like one of the girls he flirted with, just treating you as an equal to him.

No fair

You really know how to make me cry

When you gimme those ocean eyes

It wasn't until when you both moved to London for school that it happened for the first time. You both shared a flat, and you were sitting on the couch, drinking and smoking while listening to My Sweet Lord on repeat, and he was complaining, as usual. About the band he was in, about his classes, about the girls he was seeing.

You turned to him and said "God, Taylor. I don't think I can think of anyone else that complains as much as you do", and he scoffed. "Well, there's you. I can think of something else we could do", and you stared into his eyes, even more blue because of the redness around his pupils. And you knew what he was suggesting. You flirted sometimes, though you never really payed attention to it. But now, with the smoke clouding your brain, and his eyes staring deep into yours, you thought that he could do whatever he wanted with you.

And he did.

He moved his hand to your thigh, pulling you closer to him on the couch, as you kept looking into his eyes. He didn't break the contact, almost as if he was checking how far he could go before you stopped him.

But you never did.

I'm scared

I've never fallen from quite this high

Falling into your ocean eyes

Those ocean eyes

You were still friends with him, but you noticed a change in your relationship. Every time he'd come home with a girl after a gig, you felt an ache on your chest. You were used to that, emotional pain, but never before from him. You didn't realize how much influence he had over you. How much you could care about him.

And it was made worse by the fact that every few weeks, you would both fuck again - quick, messy, rough; you barely looked at each other. But you never really talked about it, not even joked about it to each other. "Don't overthink this", you told yourself in the mirror after a night with him, throwing water in your face, the bruises he made on your neck and cleavage staring back at you.

And even when those marks disappeared, you could still feel his touch on your skin. You forced yourself to go out with other people, but it was always him that ended up invading your mind.

He got further under your skin than anyone else; he wasn't just a good lay. He made you feel vulnerable, exposed, but also noticed. He saw everything that was wrong with you and was still there.

Cause the thing is, you knew his worst, too. His cheating on other girls - even with you, or when he'd call three girls in the same night just because he wasn't sure who would really come, and the three girls did, and he would then entertain two of them as the third waited on your living room, not in the mood for something groupal. The girls who waited on him to finish were usually pretty nice with you, since they visibly didn't care for sharing - one of them actually helped you pick an outfit to go out to a pub, one day.

And you were also used to his aggressive, drunk self that usually came before he started to vomit, and you'd always help him - holding his sweaty strands back, convincing him to take a cold shower, going out to the deli and getting him chips and a coke so he had something to eat before passing out. He'd done the same for you multiple times.

Or the first time you did molly together on a music festival - Roger bit his lips until they blead, and you kept dancing even after the sun went up again, burning your shoulders under the sun. The two of you took care of each other afterwards, and swore off molly.

You felt like a married couple, sometimes; only the two of you living in the same flat for nearly a year, occasionally fucking, knowing each other inside out. This thought only made it hurt more when you saw him with a girl that wasn't you.

And now, every time you fucked, you had to force yourself off the bed so you wouldn't sleep on his arms, no matter how much you wanted.

No fair

You really know how to make me cry

When you gimme those ocean eyes

I'm scared

I've never fallen from quite this high

Falling into your ocean eyes

Those ocean eyes

And then he brought a friend home one night - a guy that joined the band after the other guy, Tim, left. You know Brian, you even hang out with Brian when you go to Roger's shows and rehearsals, but you never really clicked.

Now this guy, Freddie, was almost a male version of you: very artistic, always scribbling something. Eventually, when Roger and you decided to move to a bigger flat, you invited Freddie to split the rent and live on the other room the flat had.

You felt close to Freddie, and you always helped each other out when drawing, borrowing pencils and brushes whenever necessary, and Roger just watched - he couldn't really participate in this new dynamic.

You even nearly stopped the casual fucking - the incidents, for the lack of a better word, would happen less often. It was almost like he felt Freddie was replacing him in every aspect of your life, but he wasn't - you and Freddie didn't see each other that way. But to admit it to Roger would be to admit you felt different with him, and you didn't want him to feel sorry for you as he rejected you.

Once you noticed that he feels replaced, though, you started to involve Roger in your drawings again - asking him to pose for you, drawing his car.

And that was good for you too, because you couldn't take him off your mind, now that you're getting less of him. He even started to show up in your school work, you knowing his face features so well that you drew him on everything.

One of your works was to remake pictures and cover art from pop culture with your own trace - and there was Roger's face in the same pose and with the same dim lights as Marlene Dietrich (one of Freddie's favourite pictures to the point where he has it framed in your living room), and there's Roger's face and body in the remake of the cover of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars, and there's Roger in the cover art for Aladdin Sane.

You didn't want to look creepy - and you know how creepy it was that you kept drawing your friend in each and every drawing and painting you did.

But you're used to drawing him - you started it when you were both 14. You knew the exact curve of his lips, the bridge of his nose, the format of his eyes.

I've been walking through

A world gone blind

Can't stop thinking of your diamond mind

And now you had to do oil paintings of the human physique - a nightmare for you, completely unaccustomed to oil paint. So you painted the body you knew best, and the one that you craved the most. It's been two months since the last time you had sex with Roger.

And one day, Roger came home and saw a painting on one of your easels in the living room - not an odd sight. But the painting itself caught his attention - a very detailed, realistic naked man. Once he got closer, he noticed how the man's skin tone was close to his, how he had the same haircut... the same face as Roger.

The realization hit him - you drew him naked.

He blushed.

Cause he always called himself your muse, but this was intimate - this was the way he'd lay in bed after you had sex. A part of your friendship that you never discussed.

He always thought of you as someone who's too cool for him - you never once looked intimidated by his jokes, flirting, whatever. You didn't really care. He thought you didn't give a fuck about the two of you - especially now that you had Freddie.

He tried to get mad at one of you two - but Freddie was too nice and a good frontman, so he couldn't fight him, and he could never get mad at you. All you had to do was say "Rog", in your husky voice and he'd be on his knees.

That was so unlike him. He was embarrassed, so he tried to play it cool. Pretend he wasn't hurt at the fact that you were probably fucking Freddie on his back.

But this drawing of him in a very vulnerable, intimate moment made him change his mind. Maybe you did care for him. Maybe those moments mattered to you almost as much as they mattered to him.

So he walked to your room, and knocked lightly on the door, getting in before you said "Come in". Because you never said it; you were listening to Purple Haze at maximum volume, only wearing a baggy white shirt with paint everywhere. He could see your black panties peeking from under it as you swayed your hips to the rhythm of the music.

He then looked to what you were drawing - he recognized his hair and body again. You were painting him nude, yet again. A devilish smirk appeared on his lips.

"Hey, Y/N", he screamed, and you jumped out of surprise, your eyes wide as you turned to face him. "Roger, what the fuck are you doing here?", you asked, trying to normalize your breathing.

"Oh, just checking out your paintings. It's a pretty hot guy you have as a model… I wonder who he is", he told you, ironic, walking closer to the painting.

You blushed for a moment, like a child getting caught. But you soon went back to your devil-may-care attitude - the one he was more familiar with. "Just painted the body I'm more familiar with", you shrugged, turning back to your painting so you didn't have to see his reaction. It's the first time one of you references the sex.

"It's fine. I'm honoured, really", he said, moving behind the easel so he could see your face as you worked. "My pleasure", you told him, dry. "I came here to offer my help, really", he told you, unbuttoning his shirt. "Thought you could use the real life model to make work easier", he grinned, and you looked at him. His voice sounded relaxed as usual, but his face looked tense. He was scared that you'd turn him down.

He looked so vulnerable, yet so beautiful - your bedroom had the best lighting in the house, and the sun on his skin made him look like Apollo himself, luminous.

"Sure. That'll definitely make the work flow faster", you shrugged again, but you felt a genuine smile forming as you saw him relax and start undressing.

Careful creature

Made friends with time

He left her lonely with a diamond mind

And those ocean eyes

And you painted him many times, for this project, for the ones that came after it, for your personal projects. It really made you bond again - but you didn't have sex anymore, which was confusing, cause you were seeing him naked more than ever, as he posed nude whenever you asked.

You were conscious that you were going out with even less guys, and that Roger was seeing less girls. Freddie was aware of your newfound chemistry, and always made jokes about how it felt to live third wheeling. You laughed, and Roger too, but you didn't knew what to do about it.

Then, one Sunday, Roger appeared in your doorframe, half dressed, a backpack open on his hands. "Do you wanna spend the day at the beach?", he asked, and you looked confused. "Roger, it's already autumn", you told him, and went back to scribbling. You were drawing his hands - now that he was wearing rings, they posed a new challenge to you.

"And what about it? It's better, actually. No one will be there to annoy us. You could paint me… C'mon, Y/N", he said, and you considered. It would be quite an impressive painting - the blue in his eyes and the blue of the ocean, the sand, his hair and skin mixing, too.

"Ok, Rog", you said, and started to pack your materials. "See you in my car in five minutes, then", he told you, and went back to dressing and packing at the same time.

The car ride there was a bit weird - you couldn't find a subject to talk to him, overthinking every idea he had. He wasn't starting any conversations, either.

Then once you got to the beach, you unpacked your materials, and he stood in front of you. "What should I do?", he asked, a bit insecure, and you let out a sigh. You didn't want to spend the afternoon in this uncomfortable feeling around him.

So you got up and said "Join me", as you started undressing, and wearing only your underwear, you jumped inside the cold water.

You screamed when the freezing sea touched your skin, and you soon heard Roger scream, too. "Y/N, why the fuck did you get me inside the water? It's freezing!", he screamed, and you laughed. "Thought you could handle some cold water, Taylor. But apparently I'm wrong", you told him, and splashed water on his face. "Oh, so you want war?" he asked, and started to tickle you.

You spent some time in the ocean, your bodies getting used to the temperature, joking and swimming. Once the sun got closer to the horizon, bathing everything in a golden light, you told Roger it was time to paint. You got off the water, and he followed you, watching your body as your underwear clinged to your wet skin.

But when you got to wear the beach towel was covering the sand - the perfect place for you to paint him - you were shaking, the cold wind taking away your body heat. "Hey, just a second", Roger told you before handing you a towel. After you dried yourself, he offered you one of his fur coats that was in his bag. You accepted it, the fur immediately conserving your body temperature, and you started to relax. Roger got another fur coat for himself, and also a bottle of tequila and a blunt from the bag.

"Cheers", he said, after drinking straight from the bottle and passing it to you. You drank, too, as he started to light up the blunt.

"How should I pose?", he asked, passing you the blunt.

"Just stay the way you are. It's perfect", you told him, and you started mixing the tones.

The painting was almost ready and the sun was setting as you got to Roger's eyes. He stopped posing for a moment so he could start a fire to warm the both of you.

"Thanks", you said, and he shrugged. "A way to apologize for barely passing you the blunt", he said, and you laughed. "It's okay, I barely passed you the tequila", you shrugged, too.

As you went back to painting, you were frustrated at his eyes. You just couldn't get their color right. He noticed you were stressed.

"Did I do anything wrong?", he asked, and you laughed. "No, Rog. I just can't get your eye colour right", you told him. "Why is that?" he asked again, and you shrugged again. "Don't know. They're usually pretty hard to get right, but I can do it most of the times", you said.

Maybe it was the reflex of the fire in his eyes. "I'll get a closer look at them, okay?", you asked, putting your work to the side and leaning into him, your weight on your hands and knees.

Roger looked at your body, warmly lit by the fire by your side, your black lingerie in contrast with the caramel fur. He knew how soft your skin was, and he craved feeling in on the tip of his fingers.

So he moved one of his hands so he could cup your jaw, and he saw as your breathing hitched. He hasn't touched you like this in months.

You moved one of your own hands to cup his face, and he felt the friction of the sand on your skin against him as you pulled him closer to a kiss.

None of you closed your eyes during the slow kiss.

You pushed him onto his back, and pressed his body against the sand with your own. You grinded against him as you kissed him again, and he closed his eyes as he groaned in response.

But you didn't want to hurry it - this was the first time you were fucking in months, yeah, but also the first time in felt so intimate - you were actually looking at each other during some of the kiss, and he caressed your waist under the coat, your thighs, with caring - he was not being rough for the first time. You could feel his bulge against your core, and you kept moving against it as you kissed him.

Until he had enough and started pulling your panties down, his index finger brushing against your skin under the elastic band.

You started pushing his underwear down, too, and his cock was already hard. You got on your knees, straddling him, so he could sit and take his boxers off. You then moved your bare core against the tip of his member. You both moaned.

"Just fuck me", he mumbled under his breath, his perfect lips parted. You leaned into him so you could kiss him as you pushed your body down his cock until he bottomed out inside of you.

You stayed there for a few moments, kissing him slowly, before you started riding him.

It was slow at first, and he kept his eyes on you, the electric blue driving you mad - everything around you seemed to pale in comparison. You only broke eye contact once one of you closed your eyes to moan or curse.

It was a different feeling - you could still feel the fabric of your bra against your breast as you kept riding him, moving faster and trying to keep a rhythm. You unclasped your bra, and Roger helped you off your coat and bra, and started kissing your breasts, but you could see he was having a hard time focusing on them, as you kept riding him. He was close.

But you needed to see more of him so you could come. "I need to see you", you told him, and he nodded, looking at you through his lashes and giving you a weak smirk as he took the coat off.

The cold wind was hard on your skin, but the temperature shock made you more turned on. Roger was even closer, and started to press sloppy kisses to your neck as leaned his head against your shoulder. You felt your legs burning of the effort of riding him, but you were now getting close, too, as you felt his skin against your hard nipples.

He moved his hand from your waist to your sensitive clit, and massaged it. You nearly screamed - the extra stimulation was what you needed to reach your climax, and he moved his hands to your hips to help you ride him through your high.

You felt tired and sleepy, but you kept riding him with his help, your head on his neck now, and he could feel your heavy breathing against his skin, and soon you could see the veins on his neck pop and his jaw clench as he reached his climax.

None of you moved for a few moments, until Roger felt you shiver in his arms, breaking up his embrace to get your coat.

You got off of him so he could get his own coat, but you didn't got up - you pushed him down again, covering your bodies with the coat as if it was a duvet. He chuckled as you put your head in his chest, and you look up only to see him facing you.

At that moment, the electric blue of his gaze made every other shade of blue around you even more intense - the sea and the sky. All because of his ocean eyes.

[amplesalty]

Christmas 2019: Day 9 - The Christmas Hope (2009)

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Nine months of gestation!

On reflection, I can see that the past two entries on this years list have been a bit of a downer. Far too centered in talk of mental illness, depression and the like. Let’s perk things up a bit with...*checks notes*...shit.

Right now millions of people across the planet (or galaxy as it were) are enjoying/not enjoying the end to a very different cinematic trilogy. Me? I have a long overdue wrap up to attend to that started many moons ago thanks to a certain little film about a certain pair of shoes based on a certain song. Quite why I’m doing this know I don’t know. I can only suspect that I’ve seen one too many reflective social media posts now that we’re reaching both the end of a year and decade, perhaps I’m subconsciously wanted to sort out unfinished business, hence looking at stuff like this, Christmas Story Live and the Christmas Carol Musical.

The movie starts with Traci here recording herself singing a song before commenting ‘American Idol here I come!’. The camera pans all through her house looking at pictures of her daughter, soppy picture frames with ‘I LOVE YOU MOMMY’ written on them and no sign of a boyfriend/husband so she has the basis for a feel good story if she does make it on. Might need to jazz it up somewhere along the line if we’re to really tug at the audiences heartstrings but it’s a start. This actress would go on to play Vicky in the live action Fairly Odd Parents movies so that’s another tie in to a previous entry. Apparently there’s a third one of those and I’m not sure if I’ve seen it.

She literally runs into a couple on her way to work, knocking their teddy bear to the floor which they graciously give to her when she mentions that her daughter would love it. This is Nathan and Megan from The Christmas Blessing, sadly both recast. Actually, maybe that’s a good thing. Not sure I’d be able to take NPH seriously after all those H&K movies recently. Nathan is a bit more of a ginger this time around, rather than the dirty blonde thing NPH has going on. Megan is expecting and they have about a bajillion teddies so they don’t mind passing one along. Hey, someone probably got you that as a gift. Be grateful!

Meanwhile, the police arrest a drug dealer and find she has a malnourished baby in her apartment so in swoop child services to save the day.

Mr. T feels your pain.

I hope you weren’t getting too attached to Traci by the way because about fifteen minutes into the film, shortly after making a heartfelt promise to her daughter that they were going to decorate the Christmas tree once she got home from work and that she had a very special present for her this year, she promptly gets run over.

Have you ever crossed the road, and looked the wrong way? A car's nearly on you? So what do you do? Something very silly; you freeze. Your life doesn't flash before you, cause you're too fucking scared to think, you just freeze and pull a stupid face.

I know I shouldn’t be surprised given this is one of those melodramatic, Hallmark movies and this whole series has been overly morbid up to this point but it still kinda threw me. Here we are all nice and happy, Traci’s going about her day and there’s a nice Christian, soft rock Christmas ballad playing in the background and then BOOM, SUV to the face.

Then it cuts to her daughter, Emily, going through the Christmas decorations before settling on a angel which she ponders on for a moment before looking to the heavens as she’s having this moment of intuition.

But when child services pop their head in again to take her away, they find that all their usual helpers are fully booked for the holidays so what else can they do? One of the workers, Patricia, has no choice but to take her home. It’s not by the book but, damnit, it’s Christmas and we’re going to give this kid some degree of stability. By sheer coincidence, Patricia happens to be the mother of one Sean Addision who was the kid that died following a car accident the start of Christmas Blessing which caused Nathan to have his Dr Cox crisis of confidence moment. These movies are just ridiculous to how everyone's lives are so intertwined.

Like, up to this point, we met Traci who then bumped into Nathan and Megan, before going to work and having a young, troubled teen skip out on his bill but Patricia was in at the same time and tipped really generously to make up for it. That same kid then pretty much steals her bag following accident and also knew Sean who was mentoring him in one of those Big Brother mentoring programs.

Patricia’s husband, Mark, is played by James Remar, he of The Warriors fame and, more pertinent to this blog, he was in the Miracle on 34th Street remake and one of the segments in the Tales from the Darkside movie. Theirs is a very frosty relationship currently owing to the death of Sean, there’s no sense of chemistry between these two and I’m surprised they’re actually as close in age as they are, Remar only 4 years older. Feels like there’s more of like a 10-20 year gap. He gets on very well with Emily though, they have this instant rapport whilst Patricia is more distant which is understandable. She obviously has to keep things professional as she can’t get too attached to these kids and doesn’t want them getting attached to her, plus there’s probably ongoing issues from Sean’s death, maybe she’s not prepared to slip back into that motherly role again. Which you can tell by that dinner she serves; rolls of wafer thin ham, cherry tomatoes, carrot sticks and celery? That’s just what all the kids want.

At least she’ll read Emily a bedtime story, ‘I’ll Love You Forever’ which documents a mother who sings to her song that she’ll love him forever, even when he becomes a rebellious teenager who thinks it’s lame for her to do that. This leads to the very strange visual of him cradiling her in his arms on a rocking chair and singing it to her when she’s old and frail, a mirror image of how she first sang to him when he was a baby. This really hits Patricia in the feels as she felt distant from Sean as he seemed closer to his father, wanting to impress him by picking the sports and classes he thought his father wanted him to take. She even seems to partly blame her husband for their sons death as he switched around his work schedule to come home early for Christmas, which in turn led to Sean coming home early too. If he’d just come home on the day he intended this never would have happened! That seems grossly unfair. Even when she passed along a family heirloom in the form of her fathers watch, he was unimpressed and even managed to break it whilst horsing around with a friend in his room.

The massively tangled web of these characters comes into play again when Megan is going through some things and finds an old Christmas gift which sends Nathan into some sort of Nam flashback. Turns out Sean was holding it as he was wheeled into the hospital and Nathan had taken it upon himself to make sure it found its way to its intended destination but he just forgot about it over the years. I actually went back to check this and ,yeah, that is in the previous movie. I had this whole thing pegged as just a series of independent stories with loose connections throughout but no, apparently they had whole plot points planned out in advance.

Nathan and Patricia do interact several times as she takes the crack baby to the hospital to be checked up. There’s this strange level of frustration akin to An American Tail where Nathan keeps getting little flashbacks in his head but he’s never quite able to connect the dots.

But of course he eventually does and the present turns out to be, say it with me now, the broken watch! Perhaps more meaningful though is the accompanying note which reveals Sean intended to study social work at college because he wanted to help kids just like his mom. This seems to serve as a form of closure for her but I feel like you could already start drawing that sort of conclusion. I mean, the guy was already in that Big Brother program so you were clearly already having some sort of influence on him.

Strike two of the big overly emotional finale comes when it’s suggested Emily puts the angel atop the tree which promptly makes her bolt out of the room. Everyone is left thinking they’ve upset her but she comes back clutching a picture which she wedges onto the tree, a picture not of her mother as I had suspected but of Sean. She says he is her angel and she feels like whenever she’s felt all alone, he’s been there to help here. Awww.

The big showstopper though is the troubled kid finally coming good and, after realising who everyone is in this story, returns Traci’s bag to the Addison home. Inside was her camera and on that camera was the video from the very start of the movie. Turns out she wrote that song as a Christmas gift for Emily.

Though, I feel the writers fell short of a grand slam here. Near the end, Nathan shares the story with Megan about giving the gift to Sean’s parents and how it gave him his own little bit of closure after how much Sean’s death affected him back then. Megan goes into labour shortly afterwards and I was fully expecting them to decide to call the baby Sean but no such luck.

Christmas Blessing was lacking a little bit in the big emotional ending so it feels like this one is making up for that and then some. It’s not as cheesy as that song from Christmas Shoes but still delivers that overly sentimental feeling. Again, it’s something I am loathed to admit but it got to me a little bit. This whole movie has that same morbid energy as the other two but in a slightly different way, the first two felt like you spent the entire movie watching people who were on deaths door before something happened at the end to soften the blow. Here they just give you the death right up front and everyone is left to cope with the aftermath and reflect on how deal with it. It’s like an encapsulation of everything that Nathan has gone through over these movies, facing death in his personal and professional life but coming to terms with it.

You know what’s bullshit though? No sign of the eponymous Christmas Shoes anywhere. They’re even in the box of stuff that Megan finds the old Christmas present in. How can you make this your big conclusion and not bring them back? You brought them back the last one, you couldn’t have Megan tag along and give them to Emily at the end as some sort of passing of the torch? It was her destiny, Nathan got them for his dead mother, Charlie got them for his dead mother, those shoes have been robbed of their purpose in life.