#ill probably delete this later when im not severely sleep deprived

[malconnorsupremacy]

i feel so so fucking tired all the time because all I'm expected to do day and night is study my ass off to be part of the 1% of students in this country that actually get into my dream college or I'm absolutely fucked in a tier 2 or tier 3 college that's gonna mess up my education (not to mention bankrupt my parents). i want to read books and dance and watch a movie or a show I like but I can't because if I do, im overwhelmed by such a huge wave of guilt that I cry myself to sleep.

listen I KNOW it's not healthy but what do you expect me to do when my teachers threaten to kick us out of the hierarchical top batches if we aren't in the top 10 in every fucking test? the pressure is insane, the study culture is so toxic, and the questions in our textbooks aren't getting easier.

and any time I so much as complain about this, I'm hit with the same old "you signed up for exactly this" and "you asked for this when you took up this stream". i understand that I was aware of how difficult this exam is but that doesn't negate my terrible experience up until now. to know about it is different than actively experiencing it. im just so tired.

[ironman-comics-thoughts]

how im dealing with the impending doom of final exams as told by 60s era iron man comics: