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cloveroctobers · 4 years

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GARY RENNELL —

IG info/bio | @/rennellnotreynolds | 300k followers | currently havin a midlife crisis at thee moment so cheers! 🍻🏋🏼‍♂️🤨

23 (24) years old

Born & raised in Chatham, England there’s no other place like it to him. Sure when he went on holiday to the villa, it was quite nice but nothing ever beats home. He genuinely believes that he’s meant to be in this place since it’s all he’s ever known & doesn’t think he’ll live anywhere else

Raised by his nan & is an only child. Was at risk of being placed in foster care until his paternal nan came forth to raise him

His father and nan did not have the best relationship due to the way he chose to live his life and Gary was kept away from his nan until he was about 10 years of age

Does not like to talk about his birth parents due to the trauma, which is why he feels like his nan is his everything. His savior and why she means so much to him

His nan once told him that he favors his mother, Gail. He never had the chance to really know her, but was aware that she was very unhappy with herself &, “chose to be with the stars” just before his 5th birthday

That’s one of the reasons why he finds himself always looking up at the stars, usually when he’s drunk out at the docks by himself, he’ll try to talk to his mom, to know her better

I feel like he’s either a cancer or a Libra?

Update: Cancer sun + libra moon + Taurus rising

Went to uni for a semester and thought about architecture as a profession but ultimately felt like uni was NOT for him and eventually juggled around with jobs until he landed into the crane operator field which he found himself to be great at

For as long as he and his nan can remember, he always loved playing with cars, ships, building Legos, (I’m American idk if this is a thing there too or it’s something different/similar so my apologies lol) and putting things together. He never cared for reading instructions, Gary’s a hands on type of guy/learner and it’s how he best communicates

He likes heights, so this job wasn’t an issue it was just getting through the program for 2-3 years that was a pain in his ass but he was determined + knew this was what he was good at and stuck with it.

It was tiring working 40 sometimes over 40 hrs a week but he’s passionate about his work so he’d never dare change it

Due to this job being a lot physically, he would use muscle cream to help his pain or pay to see a masseuse whenever he could or wasn’t being cheap about it + often buys epsom salt to bathe in 3 or so times a week

Total penny pincher! I can see him being so, his dad told him all about how to hold onto what he’s got and always look for a bargain but with a gambler for a father, you can only imagine how that worked in his favor

Lives with his nan and doesn’t see an issue with it. His mates definitely tease him about it but know how much the woman means to him but still think it’s a major c*ck block for him but it’s a two for one package deal and anyone who doesn’t understand that doesn’t deserve him

Will probably still live in her house once IF she p*sses

Nan is a big fan of wallpaper and has one room in the flat that has squeaky plastic covering most of her furniture ( she loves furniture shopping) & only takes it off once her lady friends come over with consists of a huge cleaning routine which Gary secretly hates but pushes through it while she plays some old tunes on her jukebox

He finds himself singing those exact songs when he’s getting ready for work and actually enjoys them...but don’t ever tell his mates that!

His nan taught him basic household care & he finds himself scolding his mates for not knowing how to wash their underwear & always taking it to their mum’s or having their girlfriends do it for them

Loves washing clothes on a Sunday in the backyard + hanging them on the clothes line. His nan doesn’t believe in washer machines & makes her own detergent

He’s always down for a rooftop hangout, whether drunk or not. To be up almost as high as the stars is such a feeling or hang out with his mates laughing it up

Occasionally smokes cigarettes when he’s really stressed, he’s not proud of the nasty habit and tries his hardest to hide it from his nan & Lottie but they both know

Is in a on and off again relationship with Lottie. She’s met his nan, they both like each other. And that makes Gary extremely happy

Gary is the laid back one out of the two and Lottie is firey and needs constant reminding from Gary that he wants to be with her whereas Gary feels like that’s something she should already know and he’s told her a couple of times before, he’s sure of it. He doesn’t get why she doesn’t get that

Which results in arguments. Lottie chose to live in England for half of the year and goes back to Australia for the other half. Nan encouraged Lottie to live with the two of them until she decided to get her own place in England, or rather the two of them together. Nan doesn’t believe Gary will leave in fear of her being lonely, which she’s not! By all means, nan keeps busy! But Lottie desperately wants to have her own space with Gary away from nan, even tho she adores the spunky lady.

When they don’t see eye to eye she does what she does best and leaves, which is exhausting to Gary

They’ll go days without speaking until the other cracks. At first it would be Gary but since it’s been a year into their relationship, he’s gotten used to it and let’s her come back to him when she’s ready

He cares for Lottie, he really does. And wants this to work but he just wishes they could be more secure in their relationship.

Was a f*ckboy way back when from 18-20 and rarely there’s his old flings who show up just to cause drama knowing that Gary’s got a new girl in his life that LIVES with him, which Gary dreads that this small town knows his business. He hates confrontation but there’s one thing about Lottie, she’s never going to bite her tongue. So whenever those girls do try it with not only her but Gary she goes off.

Gary is protective too so when those messy girls start shit at the pub, he’s instantly trying to get Lottie away from the issue. Then there’s drinks flying and slap fights happening + hair pulling & they’re getting kicked out of the club/pub or even cops called on them.

“This blows. I thought you said you were trying to be better than this, Lottie.” “Me? What about those slags?! They attack not only me but your character too!” Which adds to a list of the reasons they fight.

Nonetheless they do have their fun moments together, getting drunk by the docks, getting random tattoos, hanging with his friends & their significant others, + going to the theatre

Lottie still thinks this town is very slow-pace, sleepy, cloudy and hardly has sun— which is okay to her some days but other day’s it can be dreadful and much different from her fast-pace life but she finds the little things like spending time with Gary to encourage her to stay

Gary likes playing games when he has his free time, like fortnite, red dead redemption, Final fantasy, & SUPER SMASH BROS & almost always plays with Ibrahim who informs him about new games which makes Lottie want to slam her head against the wall since that can take hours

Keeps in touch with all of the boys in villa and makes sure they have zoom meetings as much as they can because he cares about those boys. Noah tries to schedule them but usually it’s happens at random which annoys him but he gets over it. Gary spent month(s) with them. They’re basically his extended family & that’s saying a lot since he views his home to a high standard and has friends here but they’re nothing like his villa brother’s

Also into woodwork. He didn’t think he’d enjoy it but he likes to do it more when the weather gets crisp and he battles with that over cigarettes to ease his worries in life, then goes and have his daily dose of tea

Finally stopped dying his hair that awful yellow and stuck with it. Marisol was the first to see it, after an accidental FaceTime call which was supposed to be just a regular phone call but whatever? They’d all eventually see it if he EVER decided to post to his IG stories!

She compliments him in Spanish yanking her glasses off leaving him highly confused, “is that good?” “If Lottie doesn’t sit on your— which leaves Gary very wide eyed opposed to his raised brows but Marisol is cut off by Graham clearing his throat

Lottie does indeed like it & shows him how much and later asks his option on what color she should dye her hair next. 3 out of the 13 look the exact same to Gary. But he helps her dye her hair which comes out patchy but there’s no way in hell she’s letting anyone else touch her hair. She’s been doing this all on her own for some time now. Gary’s lucky she even allowed him to help her! So she dyes it back to blonde, all of it, and waits a few weeks to dye it all blue

Gary’s definitely into old boy bands especially LFO & serenades, “girl on tv” to Lottie all the time, likes 98 degrees, Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, Boys II men, & Dru Hill

As for modern day music, he LOVES to work out to tame impala which never makes sense to his mates but he usually works out the next day after getting shit-faced, he’s also in love with lizzo’s music, laundry day, brockhampton, & rina sawayama

Anthem = mac demarco, “Salad Days”

Celeb crush? Julia Roberts, Salma Hayek, Anne-Marie, Leona Lewis, & Noah Cyrus

#litg #litg s2 #litg2 #litg gary #litg lottie #litg headcanon #litg headcanons #litg au

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denisejane9500 · 3 years

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Regal Pest Control Co. - Strategic Management Paper (part 1)

Far Eastern University

Nicanor Reyes St, Sampaloc, Manila,

1008 Metro Manila

Institute of Tourism and Hotel Management

A Strategic Management Case Study Plan for

BME1102-SEC 2 STRATEGIC MANAGEMENT

Professor: Mr. Sofronio “Toti” Dulay

Abaya, Shiela Mae

Abella, Denise Jane

Amis, Rina Kyla

An, Janine Carla

Barrueso, April Joy

Bautista, Samantha Mica

Bueta, Nykole Mar Angela

Bulanadi, Edmond Ross

May 2021

TABLE OF CONTENT

I. Executive Summary 3-4

II. Internal Assessment

a. Corporate Profile 4-7

b. Company Vision and Mission7

c. Corporate Officers 7-9

d. Product Line 9-16

e. Internal Factor Evaluation 16-18

III. External Assessment

a. Porter’s Model Analysis19-21

b. External Factor Evaluation Matrix 21-23

c. Competitive Profile Matrix 23-25

d. Key External Factor 25-28

IV. Strategy Formulation

a. Boston Consulting Group Matrix 28-31

b. Strategic Position and Action Evaluation Matrix 31-34

c. Grand Strategy Matrix 34-35

d. Internal – External Matrix 36-37

e. Strength – Weaknesses – Opportunities – Threats Analysis 37-48

f. Quantitative Strategies Planning Matrix 48-51

V. Strategy Recommendation 52-53

VI. Action Plan 53-57

VII. Conclusion 58-60

VIII. Financial Projection 60-62

IX. References 62-67

I. EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

Regal Pest Control Co. is a family-owned and regulated company that has been in the pest management market since 1988. It is a Filipino business duly established as a partnership and registered with the Securities and Exchange Commission, operating under and subject to the laws of the Republic of the Philippines. Regal Pest Control with over thirty (30) years of experience in the pest control business assure all consumers and future consumers their well-developed strategy to achieve the best pest control service. The Regal Pest Control team has earned not only experience but also the reputation of providing customers with the most comprehensive range of services and products.

The major competitors of Regal Pest Control are Entech Philippines and TermaxPro Pest Control Services. Entech Philippines is a total care system business offering clients realistic and long-term solutions for achieving and maintaining safe, sanitary, and balanced conditions of their houses and buildings. TermaxPro has prioritized being a customer-friendly company that offers secure and consistent care. The business exists to provide support to meet the stringent requirements of new commercial companies and homeowners. Regal Pest Control can maintain and improve its market growth in the pest control industry by enhancing the current strategies and creating new strategies to boost the overall performance of the company.

All the different matrices such as IFE, Porter’s Model, EFE, BCG SPACE, GSM, IE, SWOT and QSPM were used, and these matrices showed how Regal Pest Control operates and stayed afloat in the pest control industry and indicated their strong internal position and their strength to achieve all the demands of their target market. But it also showed the things that needed to improve in the company and how it affects the company's competitive position in the market. The recommended strategies that were evident on the matrices for Regal Pest Control are Market Penetration, Market Development, and Product Development. Under these strategies are the action plan needed to improve Regal Pest Control. In the Market Penetration, the action plans needed are Creating an official website, Hire influencers or celebrities, Partnerships with local TV Networks, and Loyalty Card Reward System. Under the Market Development Strategies; New store branches outside Metro Manila and Online reservations and delivery of products. Lastly, the strategies needed under Product Development are Hiring pest control professionals, Investing in new technology, Feedback System, and Partnership with International chemical suppliers.

In using these strategies, Regal Pest Control will strengthen its strengths, take advantage of the opportunities, improve its weaknesses, and avoid future threats that may negatively impact the company. This will be a way for Regal Pest Control to establish its identity and make a solid competitive position in the pest control industry.

II. INTERNAL ASSESSMENT

a. COMPANY PROFILE

ADDRESS

50 San Roque Street Barangka Ilaya, Mandaluyong City, Philippines

PHONE NUMBER

63 (2) 534-6350

BRANCHES:

18 Mintcor Townhouse, West Service Road, South Super Hi-way, Cupang, Muntinlupa

50 San Roque Street, Barangka Ilaya, Mandaluyong City, Metro Manila, Philippines

Regal Pest Control Co. is a family-owned and operated business that has been in the industry since 1988. The company was established and managed by the former President of Pest Exterminators Association of the Philippines (PEAP) from 1995-1996, Atty. Silverio R. Garing on April 4, 1988, with a total number of 22 employees. Since then, the company was categorized as a Certified Pesticide Applicator/Exterminator. It is a Filipino company, adequately incorporated as a partnership and registered with the Securities and Exchange Commission, existing under and under the laws of the Republic of the Philippines. With over thirty (30) years of experience in the pest control industry, Regal Pest Control is a company that guarantees all the customers their well-developed strategies in ensuring that the customers will receive the best pest control experience.

Over the years, the company developed pest control services that will help eradicate wide-range pest issues in our homes and our office. It is not surprising that our homes are often infected by pests, especially that we are living in a tropical rainforest country. According to Vail et al. (2020), lighting, warm air, rain, and food all attract pests. They seek refuge and safety in dim cavities in floors or enclosed spaces. Many different insects are considered pests in our household, but the most common is called “bugs.” Some of these pests, such as termites, necessitate the use of specialized equipment and expertise to add vast quantities of insecticides to any possible entry points into our household or building.

Regal Pest Control, with the help of its partners like multinational firm’s suppliers and distributors of environment-friendly chemicals for Pest and Termite Control Services, the company developed new technology such as Baiting systems, Fogging Method, Misting Method, Rat Disposal Service, Garden Pest Control, Rat Abatement Maintenance Programme and General Pest Abatement Maintenance Programme for Non-Structural Pest. For Structural Pest, Regal Pest Control provides Termite Proofing Works, Soil Poisoning, Cement Drilling Method, Wood Drenching, Termite Mound Demolition, and Termite Abatement Maintenance Programme, etc. The Regal Pest Control team has gained not only experience but also the prestige of supplying consumers with the widest variety of facilities and products.

OBJECTIVES

According to Michigan Government (n.d.), objectives are specific, time-bound, measurable acts that contribute to the achievement of a company. A company has an advantage if they have their objective clear and precise. This will ensure a clear path towards their success. Setting objectives makes it easy to evaluate a company's results. If objectives are reached, it may be stated that the company did its strategies effectively.

Regal Pest Control's objective is to establish a company that would provide work ethics characterized by honesty, sincerity, and dedication to duty. The company aims to provide a reliable and trustworthy service to the client.

Short-Term Objectives

- To hire capable employees that are willing to learn and grow in the company

- To acquire prominent clients to expand business

- Develop new techniques to enhance service and production

Long-Term Objectives

- Purchase new machineries to increase production

- To expand to other parts of the Philippines by creating more store branches

- Investing in the employees to lessen employee turnovers

b. COMPANY VISION AND MISSION

VISION

To achieve the highest level of Customer Service towards the full satisfaction of our clients and to create a working environment that will promote productivity among themselves.

MISSION

A company that will provide at all times to the General Clientele with reliable, honest, professional and quality service.

c. CORPORATE OFFICERS

GENERAL MANAGER

Silverio R. Garing

ASSISTANT GENERAL MANAGER

Rebecca G. Garing

TREASURER

Vistoria Garing

BOOK KEEPER

Jackelyn Serrano

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE

Ronaldo Fontanilla

Froilan Cravalho

SECRETARY

Lyra Luz Garing

SERVICE FOREMAN

Edwin Bulanadi

BRANCH MANAGER/ATTENDANT

Frederick Garing

MAIN BRANCH

Address: 50 San Roque Street, Barangka Ilaya, Mandaluyong City, Metro Manila, Philippines

EXTERNAL BRANCH

Address: 18 Mintcor Townhouse, West Service Road, South Super Hi-way, Cupang, Muntinlupa

d. PRODUCT LINE AND SERVICES

Pests navigate their way into our households regardless of how meticulous we are about our household chores. Some of these pests cause severe damage to foods, clothes, rugs, and wooden furniture, while others transmit diseases. According to Cranshaw (2011), arthropods that inadvertently invade buildings are among the most common residential/structural pest scenarios, referred to as "nuisance invaders." Pests, such as cockroaches, flies, rats, and other insects, can be a real danger in our homes and company. Pest management in the home is essential all year. Any insect infestations, such as termites, will almost often necessitate the assistance of a reputable pest control operator (Hantsbarger, 1981). That is the reason why hiring a pest control operator is the easiest way to eradicate and minimize the negative effect of these pests. Below you can see the different products and services that Regal Pest Control treatment company provides.

PRODUCTS

Pest and Termite Control Chemicals and Equipment

Probuild

A termiticide is a synthetic version of a flower’s pyrethrum, which exterminates every species of subterranean and dry wood termites through contact and stomach action to restrain them from returning to structures.

Hometrek

A termiticide protects against subterranean termites by forming a liquid barrier that remains in the soil for at least five years.

Optigard Ant Gel

A non-repellent termiticide used for controlling subterranean termites is applied before and after the construction of structures.

Maxxthor Termiticide

It prevents and controls subterranean termite infestations in and around structures. It forms a barrier that will prevent the termites from entering the structure.

Termitrol

It aims to address the root cause of the problem; thus, its target is to eliminate the termite colony. Termitrol is a special kind of termiticide that is non-repellent and has a delayed mode of lethal action which means when termites have contact with the poison, they will not immediately die. Consequently, it enables the poison to be passed on to other termites resulting in the extermination of the whole colony.

Devron

A termiticide injected into the soil creates a constant chemical barrier that blocks termites’ entry points in the structure and terminates termites.

Stedfast

A termiticide that contains alpha-cypermethrin is environment friendly. It is a long-lasting termite control solution that deals with termite infestations and protects structures from future or potential infestations.

Solignum

It is a wood preservative that serves as a safeguard against termites like wood borers and fungi.

Cislin EC

A spray that treats wood surfaces and flushes pests’ residuals.

Resigen

It is a space spray for pests such as mosquitoes, flies, and cockroaches. The solution can be diluted with diesel or kerosine if it will be used outdoors. If it is for indoor treatment, it should be diluted with water.

Solfac

It contains Cyfluthrin which is ideal for treating cockroach, housefly, and mosquito infestation. It can also prevent Malaria.

Crackdown Residual Insecticide AU

It is a general insecticide to control various insects like carpet beetle, silverfish, flea, flies, bird mites, and cockroaches.

Veneers

It is a stone veneer insect repellent. Stone Veneers are very durable. Therefore, they can prevent the entrance of pests into a structure.

Outlook

It is an herbicide that protects crops such as cornfields, cotton, garlic, dry beans, and many more.

Optigard Termite Liquid

It is a bait that attracts ants, and when ingested and shared by ants to the colony, it will lead to complete control.

Solfac WP

It is used as an indoor residual spray for the control of mosquitoes which prevents dengue, malaria, and other diseases carried by mosquitoes.

Novim

It is an insecticide that targets the nervous system of pests. Insects’ exposure to Novim will cause hyper excitation and tremors in their nerves which leads to paralysis and death.

Pervade

It is an insecticide that is lethal to pests. When exposed to this insecticide, pests will experience hyper excitation and tremors in their nerves which leads to convulsions, paralysis, and death.

Deluge

It is one of the most common insecticides that is very effective in controlling household pests such as cockroaches, flies, mosquitoes, ants, etc.

Pesguard

A spray that has the ability to control both flying and crawling pests such as bed bugs, cockroaches, houseflies, mosquitoes, and beetles.

Responsar

It contains beta Cyfluthrin which is able to control insect pests such as houseflies, cockroaches, and mosquitoes.

Vakem

It is a fumigant that is effective in controlling household, public health, and stored product insects such as aphids, caterpillars, thrips, and flies.

Dichlorvos

It is an insecticide that is used to eliminate household and agricultural pests.

Vapona

An insecticide for cattle and livestock premises as it is able to control parasites such as mosquitoes, horse flies, face flies, stable flies, and houseflies.

Racumin Paste

It is a rodenticide that is effective in controlling rodents or rats and mice.

Storm

It is a rodenticide that is very effective in controlling rodents as it is able to kill or eliminate rats.

Icon

It is an environment friendly and non-carcinogenic insecticide that is highly effective in controlling cockroaches, flies, and mosquitoes.

Bosny Rat Glue

It is an adhesive trap to catch rats when they wander across its surface.

· Klerat Wax Block

It is a single feed bait for rodents that is easy to use.

SERVICES

NON-STRUCTURAL ACCOUNT

· General Pest Abatement Maintenance Program (GPAMP)

Designed for the control of cockroaches, mosquitoes, bugs, flies, and other flying and crawling insects that transmit more than 35 communicable diseases to man. The treatment is done by spraying, misting, or brushing.

· Rat Abatement Maintenance Program (RAMP)

Usually placed the rat bait in strategic areas that are safe to humans and where rats normally roam around.

· Fogging Method (FM)

Using a fine pesticide spray (aerosol) which is directed by a blower.

· Misting Method (MM)

Allowing the pesticides to stay suspended in air to kill all flying insects. It will be conducted for external areas including drainages and canal.

· Garden Pest Control (GPC)

Remove mealybugs from plants with strong sprays of water or swabbing with alcohol-dipped cotton swabs.

· Rat Disposal Service (RDS)

Remove dead rats by placing animals in tightly sealed containers for proper disposal and by the use of traps or poisons.

STRUCTURAL ACCOUNT

TERMITE PROOFING WORKS (Under Construction Project)

a) Phase I - Soil Poisoning

By applying 4 liters of the strong chemical called Termiticide solution per square meter of slab foundation. Spraying must be prepared when the foundation bed has remained completed and ready for pouring of concrete.

b) Phase II - Treatment of the building skeletal Framework

It is stated to control pests in or near a structure. Its favorable conditions will make the build-up of pest populations less heavy and leaves a perfectly cleaned skeleton in a small pile.

c) Phase III - Final Treatment

It is important to not clean immediately, Pest control treatments are usually personalized based on your requests. So, you will be told when you can clean again and if there are any areas you should not rinse. Do not do a deep cleaning for at least a week.

TERMITE CONTROL SERVICES

· Soil Poisoning (SP)

Involves treating the soil around your house with a termite insecticide, such as imidacloprid. Woods can also be treated directly if termites are inside. Termite baits are strategically placed around your yard to lure termites in.

· Cement Drilling Method (CDM)

Drilling concrete slabs and injecting chemicals is one of the ways to protect a property from termites. Holes are often drilled around a perimeter to ensure a complete chemical barrier.

· Wood Drenching (WD)

Chemical treatment of the fill material prior to pouring a concrete slab protects wood in the building from termite attack.

· Termite Mound Demolition (TMD)

Search for these termite mounds, destroy them and thoroughly treat the surrounding. This is done by trenching, spraying or injection methods.

· Borer (Bukbok) Abatement Maintenance Program (BAMP)

Proper waste disposal process and sanitation to reduce infestation and use of the correct treatment, chemicals to get rid of wood borers for individual circumstances.

· EXTERRA Termite Interception and Baiting System

Some bait stations are installed below ground out in the yard, while others are placed within the structure in the vicinity of active termite mud tubes.

e. INTERNAL FACTOR EVALUATION MATRIX

According to David and David (2017), this strategy-formulation method outlines and analyses the key strengths and weaknesses in a company's functional areas and provides a foundation for defining and assessing relationships between those areas. The table below shows the strengths and weaknesses of the company Regal Pest Control and how it affects the company's internal structure.

Legend

Rating:

4 - Major Strength 3 - Minor Strength 2 - Minor Weakness 1 - Major Weakness

Internal Factor Evaluation Analysis

In relation to the purpose of the IFE Matrix, the table shows that Regal Pest Control has the two most essential factors in line with their business: Contract completion on time and Financial Stability. It only shows that the Regal Pest Control has an excellent internal structure. On the other hand, the company is also experiencing some weaknesses like lack of company website and lack of modern advertisement mode. It is essential to update and have enough information on their website to allow their customers to know what they can offer and what is new about their services. If this is not handled well, this may be a problem for the company because they may be out of date and will not keep pace with their competitors.

Overall, the Regal Pest Control receives a score of 2.68. Based on IFE Matrix, Regal Pest Control weighted above average, meaning the company has a good standing and a solid internal position. Nevertheless, this also shows that there is still much room for improvement to enhance and fully operate without shortcomings.

III. EXTERNAL ASSESSMENT

Market Position

Since Regal Pest Control is a company that is still finding its way to the competitive market of the pest control business, the basis for the market position that will be used is according to the estimated net income of Regal Pest Control and its competitors.

Company Net Income

Regal Pest Control ₱ 400,168

ENTECH Philippines ₱ 680,560

TermaxPro Pest Control Services ₱ 756,845

Competitors:

ENTECH Philippines

ENTECH Philippines is a Total Care System provider that provides clients with practical and long-term strategies to achieve and preserve clean, sanitary, and healthy environments. Integrated Pest Management (General Pest Management, Termite Management, Other Pests), Professional Cleaning (Disinfecting, Deep Cleaning, Furniture Cleaning), and Environmental Solutions are among the high-quality facilities (Entech Philippines, 2021).

TermaxPro Pest Control Services

TermaxPro Pest Control Services has focused on being a customer-friendly business that provides safe and dependable care. The company is there to provide service and satisfy the strict demands of new commercial enterprises and homeowners. Many of their pest controllers have received extensive training through certified PEAP (Pest Exterminators Association of the Philippines) workshops (TermaxPro Pest Control, 2021).

a. PORTER’S MODEL

According to Bruijil (2018), Porter's Model is built on the principle that a corporate approach can counter opportunities and threats in the organization's external environment. A strategic approach should be based on a thorough understanding of market structures and how they adjust. It is a method for analysing the level of competition in a market and developing competitive strategies.

Porter’s Framework Analysis

Regal Pest Control is already thirty (30) years in service and continues to maintain the pest-free status to where they provide their service and is now competing with ENTECH Philippines and TermaxPro Pest Control Services, which has only a few years in service, but a lot of people knows their company name and patronizing their service.

The business Regal Pest Control is bound to have the threat of new entrants, which are the Dexterminator Pest Control Services, Mapecon, and Pest-Ex Pest Control Services Metro Manila that would challenge their business. Since technology has been changing from time to time, there is a need to scale up within the company to keep abreast with the time, and it is not hard for other companies to come up with the same line of business.

The one who supplies the pest control companies or services is the chemical distributors in the Philippines, which provides chemicals to each pest control company to be used for cleaning and washing out the pests that dwell in areas and facilities.

The substitute products for Regal Pest Control or any pest control services that use chemicals as an active ingredient to kill pests are agricultural netting and cultural control, which is risk-free and has no adverse consequences.

The target market of Regal Pest Control is the sub-urban and urban people in which maintaining clean and safe facilities and areas are their priority, especially that there are a lot of buildings, offices, and restaurants present in the area.

b. EXTERNAL FACTOR EVALUATION MATRIX

An External Factor Evaluation (EFE) Matrix enables strategists to compile and analyse financial, societal, cultural, demographic, environmental, political, governmental, legal, and competitive details that will help the company know if their strategies successfully capitalize on emerging opportunities while minimizing the possible negative impacts of external threats (David & David, 2017).

Legend

Rating:

4 - Major Strength 3 - Minor Strength 2 - Minor Weakness 1 - Major Weakness

External Factor Evaluation Analysis

In accordance with the purpose of the EFE, Regal Pest Control showed the opportunities and threats present in the company. Based on the table above, Regal Pest Control earned a cumulative weighted score of 2.65 on the EFE Matrix. The EFE Matrix is focused on an overview of the general climate and these external conditions that impact the sector to determine new opportunities and threats for Regal Pest Control. According to the weighted ratings, the company's response has a significant impact on its existing opportunities and threats in the pest control sector.

There is a series of opportunities like increased demand for Pest Control Services, new agreements that will deal them better pricing of services, and decreased taxes in the external factor matrix. In the threats section, we will see the new competitors who would either be in the same line of business, predicted natural disasters that may lessen the demand for their services, and new laws in this ever-changing time that will require them to have a change in framework.

c. COMPETITIVE PROFILE MATRIX

According to Bhattacharjee and Dey (2015), the Competitive Profile Matrix (CPM) is an analytical method that offers competitive edge information focused on key performance factors and acts as the foundation for an organization's strategy. It also enables the firm's owners to compare their firm to main competitors by using crucial performance factors.

Legend

Rating:

4 - Major Strength 3 - Minor Strength 2 - Minor Weakness 1 - Major Weakness

Competitive Profile Matrix Analysis

In relation to the primary purpose of CPM, which is to know the company's competitive advantage, Regal Pest Control compared to the two (2) present competitors where you can see and evaluate from the table above. Regal Pest Control received a weighted score of 2.96 based on the CPM matrix, while Entech Philippines received a weighted score of 3.67 and TermaxPro Pest Control Services received a weighted score of 3.69. About the fact that TermaxPro Pest Control Services has the highest weighted average, some of its variables have varying ratings and weights.

To keep up in the future, Regal Pest Control should improve their competitive edge and make additional changes for variables that have poor ratings, allocating additional advertisements and investments, especially in advertising, reliable work, and customer loyalty.

d. KEY EXTERNAL FACTOR

Key External Factors

Political

Political factor is the extent wherein the government can intervene or influence the economy, thereby influencing the industry. This is evident during the global pandemic where they had the call which businesses would be open or not. There will be scenarios where the pest industry will be affected, especially with the rules and regulations imposed by the current and future administration. There will be possible problems in the political arrangements in place to deal with growing tensions throughout the transition of power in a post-election period, resulting in an election-related violence that may affect the industry (Alihodžić & Burcher, 2013).

Economic

This is how economic conditions may affect the supply and demand of the industry, therefore, affecting the company. These may also depend on the services which are deemed necessary nowadays. In line with the economy, the activities that are performed are somehow the ones that are in demand. Now that we are in the middle of the pandemic, the economy of the Philippines is deteriorating. In fact, in 2020, the Philippines experienced its highest unemployment and the most significant drop in GDP in history (Lim, 2020). All of the businesses, including the pest industry, were severely affected because of the economic drop in the Philippines. This shows how the economy can affect the business, especially if the world is dealing with a pandemic.

Social

With the social factor, this is how the customer expectations and desires are reflected in changes in the socio-cultural business environment. According to Masovic (2018), culture and society are not actively involved in business activities; they do play an important role in influencing how well the company is handled, on which products are manufactured, and how and by what methods these will be marketed to the development of administrative and organizational practices. A company examines the socio-economic context of a given industry's market in order to fully understand how the consumer needs and wants are formed and what drives them to the store to make a purchase. This just shows how society has a significant impact on the company's products, especially that Regal Pest is a company that produces products. Adults often purchase the pest control industry's products, the reason why Regal Pest Control should examine and come up with strategies that could reach all ages, not just adults.

Technological

Technology has the potential to carry out the company's advantages and opportunities. It strengthened the market and industry by developing new products and services, establishing new markets, and increasing company efficiency. Most businesses or companies have a working technology to reach out to the consumers, deliver goods, and provide high-quality services. Consumers can shop for goods and services without leaving their homes. It is much easier to provide online reservations for pest industry products and services with the aid of technology, particularly now that we are in the midst of a pandemic.

Environmental

Environmental aspects are elements of an organization's activities, products, or services that can interact with the environment (Ganguly, n.d). Environmental factors include climate change, availability of non-renewable goods, and eco-friendliness of the products that affect the company's operations or customer demand. It may also affect the consumers' health. For the Regal Pest Control, these may include the chemicals used to perform the job and affect the said company. Many chemical products are hazardous for the company and consumers. There should be strategies to minimize the effects and broaden the options to provide more environmentally-friendly products.

Legal

It comes with the requirements needed in a particular territory or laws to perform the business and may differ from one territory to another, which needs to be considered when businesses are opened. The pandemic has indeed compelled nations all over the world to impose unparalleled lockdowns, forcing companies to close for long periods and imposing restrictions in our daily lives to mitigate and possibly minimize the effect of the pandemic in the Philippines. This is the best example of how legal actions affect the business because everyone is required to follow government restrictions, especially if it is connected to the business.

IV. STRATEGY FORMULATION

a. BOSTON CONSULTING GROUP MATRIX

The BCG Matrix is designed by Bruce D. Henderson of the Boston Consulting Group, a private management consulting firm specializing in strategic planning (Boston Consulting Group, n.d). This matrix serves as an aid for companies or organizations in analysing their business units or product lines which are also called divisions. The BCG Matrix graphically presents the differences among the product lines in terms of their relative market share position and industry growth rate, consequently allowing the organizations to manage their business portfolios in order to formulate suitable strategies for each division (David & David, 2017).

The relative market share is on the graph's x-axis, and the industry growth rate is on the y-axis of the graph. The matrix consists of four quadrants: The Question Marks or Quadrant I, Stars or Quadrant II, Cash Cows or Quadrant III, and Dogs or Quadrant IV. The units situated on the Question Marks Quadrant have a low relative market share, but they compete in a high-growth industry. The units on the Stars Quadrant have a high relative market share and a high industry growth rate which means they represent the companies' best opportunities for growth and profitability. The divisions on the Cash Cows Quadrant have a high relative market share but compete in a low growth industry. Lastly, the divisions on the Dogs Quadrants are weak because they have low relative market share and compete in a slow or no market growth industry (David & David, 2017).

The Regal Pest Control Company divisions are listed in the table above and their revenues and profits. The first division is the Termite Control Services; the second division is the Pest and Termite Control Chemicals and Equipment; the third is the Non-Structural Account and the Structural Account. In the External Assessment, the market position and the net income of Regal Pest Control and its competitors were recorded. With that data, the relative market share was calculated by dividing the profit percentage by the competitor with the highest market share. According to Grand View Research, the industry growth of Pest Control Services is approximately 5%, while the industry growth of Pest Control Products is approximately 4%.

The figure below is the BCG Matrix of Regal Pest Control Company:

Boston Consulting Group Matrix Analysis

Based on the figure above, Division 1 or the Termite Control Services are situated in the stars quadrant because it has the coordinates of (0.85,5). This means that the company may adopt strategies such as forward, backward, or horizontal integration, market penetration, market development, and product development. Next, the second division is the Pest Control Products; though the industry growth rate is not as high as the industry growth rate of pest control services, it is still located at the stars quadrant with division 1. The same set of strategies can be adopted for this division. There are no divisions on the dog's quadrant, which is suitable for the company. Lastly, divisions 3 and 4 or the non-structural account and structural account are both on the question marks quadrant because they have the same relative market share and industry growth rate. Strategies for the divisions in this quadrant would be market penetration, market development, product development, or divestiture.

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thebowerypresents · 4 years

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POSITIVE SPINS: NEW ARTISTS, NEW ALBUMS, AND NEW LIVE STREAMS THAT PUT OUR 2020 ON A BETTER TRACK

2020 proved to be one of the hardest years we have collectively gone through. While we didn’t have live music to lean on when times got tough, these are the albums, artists and livestreams that got us through the rough patches and will carry us into a brighter 2021.

Listen to our playlist of Positive Spins!

BEST NEW ARTISTS OF 2020 (in no particular order)

THICK

“Brooklyn-based pop-punk three-piece, THICK, are not afraid to say (or sing) what’s on everyone’s mind - with a fierceness and confidence I can only aspire to assume. Sticking it to the establishment is the name of their game - take “Mainsplain,” for instance - and they manage to do so with catchy chord progressions and an uplifting vigor. I can’t wait to see what’s next for the trio, and who else they’ll put in check.” - S. D.

Ela Minus

“Brooklyn-based techno-pop artist Ela Minus broke onto the scene this year with her debut album “ acts of rebellion.” The Colombian-born musician has a background in emo bands, is a trained jazz drummer, and she wrote, produced, engineered, and recorded the album on her own. “acts of rebellion” is moody and sultry, while still making you want to grab your friends and dance.” - K. C.

Arlo Parks

“Without even having released her debut album yet, Arlo Parks has made a name for herself this year. Singles released throughout the year, paired with 2019’s EP ‘Sophie’ and her slot as support on Hayley Williams’ (cancelled) tour have boosted Arlo to a new level this year, that we can only assume will continue to rise in 2021 when her debut album drops.” - K. C.

Beabadoobee

“Beabadoobee’s interesting name is only matched by her sound - bedroom-pop fused with nineties indie-rock, tinged with a tender, DIY aesthetic. Her track “If You Want To” will have you singing along, while her single “She Plays Bass” will take you back to your hormonal, vulnerable, teenage years met with sublime nostalgia. She’s without a doubt a silver lining in 2020.” - S. D.

BENEE

“I first saw Auckland’s BENEE at Rough Trade in October of last year - her sincere, to-the-point lyrics and quirky hooks instantly hooked me. You may know her track, “Supalonely,” which found popularity on TikTok during the height of lockdown, but BENEE’s sound isn’t limited to the confines of one social media trend. In her debut album released this year, BENEE displays an uncanny ability to tackle alt-rock, hip-hop and electro-pop all at the same time, in an unbothered, endearing way - making her a “one to watch” in 2020 and beyond.” - S. D.

Christian Lee Hutson

There isn’t a lack of acoustic singer-songwriters out there, but Christian Lee Hutson is an important new voice. Hutson first full length album, “Beginners,” released this year, has a warm and honest quality to it. The production is subtle (thanks to producer Phoebe Bridgers), and so perfectly complements a simple, acoustic narrative. The result is a soulful, beautiful, and special work of music. - S. D.

Do Nothing

“2020 newcomers out of Nottingham, UK, Do Nothing have already made a big splash in the post-punk world. Releasing their first EP, Zero Dollar Bill, earlier this year, the band have been compared to Idles and are setting out on a similar path of success. Upon first hearing their earlier single Lebron James, countless fans are sure to be sucked into the world of Do Nothing.” - K. C.

Kate Bollinger

“I first listened to Kate Bollinger when she released I Don’t Wanna Lose in 2019. I played the track Candy on repeat all year long. It has been so lovely to watch her grow into the artist she is today. This year she released an EP called A word becomes a sound, which quickly became one of my favorite releases of 2020. Her voice is so comforting. Whenever I listen, I feel like I am being coddled in a fluffy blanket with a cup of herbal tea and nothing could go wrong at that moment. I can’t wait to see what Kate has planned for 2021 and beyond!” - L. S.

SAULT

“After a year of intense racial unrest in the United States, SAULT’s importance is more significant now than ever. With themes focusing around the Black Lives matter movement, this mystery soul-funk group has become more than buzzy in the music scene, and has earned a spot on tons of year end lists.” - K. C.

Sorry

“London-based genre-defying band Sorry released their debut album ‘925’ this year, produced by James Dring (Gorillaz, Jamie T) which is already reason enough to pique the interest of most. The album certainly does not disappoint, with each song giving you a different taste of the many interesting sides of this up-and-coming group.” - K. C.

Honorable Mentions:

Gracie Abrams Remi Wolf Hailey Whitters KennyHoopla Jade Hairpins Jockstrap Model/Actriz Mild Orange Your Smith Neal Francis

BEST NEW ALBUMS OF 2020 (in no particular order)

Fiona Apple – Fetch the Bolt Cutters

“Fiona Apple is fearless in this album. The song structures and sounds take you on a listening experience I can only describe as emotional in the best way. Eight years of waiting was totally worth it.“ - S. D.

Fleet Foxes – Shore

“This album had been bright spot in a difficult year. St. Ann’s Church was the perfect location for their Colbert performance of Can I Believe You and the live stream will be the perfect holiday present. Ready to feel all the feels!” - K. A.

Khruangbin - Mordechai

“Khruangbin is one of my go-to bands, and “Mordechai” has been heavy in my rotation in 2020. It’s really a great album – I play it cover-to-cover and pairs well with a cocktail and cooking at home, infusing some needed spice and energy in what could otherwise be ‘just another night’ during a long, monotonous several months.” - C.M.

Moses Sumney - Græ

“The highly anticipated second album from Moses Sumney, shows us more of the highly personal, raw and emotionally moving music we have some to expect from him. The cluster of emotions that Moses works through with his beautifully unique voice in this 20 song album give us a look into the complicated mind of one of the most interesting artists of the last 5 years.” - K. C.

Perfume Genius – Set My Heart On Fire Immediately

“*Bill Hader’s Stefan voice* this album has everything! From the heavy and distorted bass on “Describe” to the melodic harp stringing of “Leave,” to the dance ballad (is that a thing?) “On The Floor,” Perfume Genius’ album Set My Heart on Fire Immediately really does have it all. Each song feels vastly different from the next in tone, instrumentation, and influence – yet they all come together so perfectly to make this stunning album, all while showcasing his vocal depth and range. There’s a reason he’s called Perfume *Genius*, and that is because Mike Hadreas can take familiar feelings and turn them into unconventional pop ballads that feel both relatable, but new and exciting at the same time.” - R. E.

Phoebe Bridgers – Punisher

“How does Phoebe do it? (a question I ask myself daily). I remember waking up on June 18 as if it was my birthday. Punisher is everything I hoped for and then some more. The last song on the album, “I know The End” concludes with a scream which is the perfect cherry on top to this masterpiece. This album is a rollercoaster of Phoebe’s emotions and I feel blessed to be along for the ride. It is relatable, heartfelt and honest. Thank you to Phoebe for this gift. The world will never be the same after this.” - L. S.

Rina Sawayama - SAWAYAMA

“SAWAYAMA is the early 2000s pop resurgence we didn’t know we needed, mixed with all the best parts of nu-metal. Rina Sawayama uses catchy pop hooks reminiscent of early Britney Spears, and pairs them with heavy guitar riffs to give us arguably the most fun album of 2020 that we cannot wait to experience live.” - K. C.

Tame Impala – The Slow Rush

Thundercat - It Is What It Is

“I love how this album embraces the darkness while managing to find the light in despair - it seems to acutely reflect the times we are in yet is simultaneously so personal to Bruner. The lyrics are set against a backdrop of funk, electronica, jazz, and soul, so there’s a little something for everybody.” - S. D.

Waxahatchee - Saint Cloud

“This album was released early in quarantine, and was the perfect musical escape during some of the toughest days. The imagery and reflection of the lyrics are why Saint Cloud tops my list of albums of 2020.” - J. F.

Honorable Mentions: The Beths – Jump Rope Gazers Fontaines DC - A Heros Dream Kevin Morby – Sundowner Jason Isbell & the 400 Unit – Reunions My Morning Jacket - The Waterfall II CHIKA - Industry Games Megan Thee Stallion - Suga Christian Lee Hutson- Beginners Idles- Ultra Mono Sturgill Simpson - Cuttin Grass Pup - This Place Sucks Ass Futurebirds- Teamwork Adrianne Lenker – Songs / Instrumentals Tom Misch, Yussef Dayes - What Kinda Music + the bonus tracks EP Some Kind Of Peace – Olafur Arnalds Tyler Bryant and the Shakedown - Pressure Josh Ritter - See Here, I Have Built You a Mansion Sahara Moon - Worthy Local H - Lifers Deep Purple - Whoosh! Indigo Girls Look Long Taylor Swift - folklore Against All Logic – 2017-2019

TOP TEN LIVESTREAMS 2020 (in no particular order)

Christine & The Queens (Live on KEXP at Home)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bavZe47um4

“Live on KEXP at Home” was home to some of my favorite quarantine livestreams, and this one did anything but disappoint. Not only does Chris, aka Christine & The Queens, perform, but interviews are woven throughout the livestream. The drama of her performances, juxtaposed with her witty and humorous banter with the interviewer was such a breath of fresh air. If you’re a fan of Chris, this is a must watch.“ - S. D.

Courtney Barnett and Lucius & Friends: Live From Our Lounge Rooms with Sheryl Crow, 3/25/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbfRbw3o1jU

“This was a gift that kept on giving. The stream started off with Courtney Barnett and Lucius in matching pajamas. I truly thought it could not get any better but I was in for a treat! The stream included performances by Nathaniel Rateliff, Sheryl Crow, Sharon Van Etten, Waxahatchee, Kevin Morby and more. I can safely say this was my favorite live stream I watched in 2020.” - L. S.

Julien Baker, Themfest Instagram Livestream, 4/16/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tINSbY4wRjs

“Recorded for Themfest during the early days of quarantine, Julien Baker’s in-home livestream was a welcome respite from the Cuomo briefings and general despair of mid April. Just kidding, Julien Baker is the queen of Sad Shit and I certainly didn’t tune into this livestream expecting a mood boost. But if you subscribe to the “sad songs make me feel better” aesthetic purveyed by our sweet little siren, this moody, intimate shot-on-iphone set will scratch that itch. But let’s not fool ourselves, nothing will ever replace the feeling of holding your breath along with 1,799 others at Brooklyn Steel while JB rips your heart out, in a nice way.” - E. M.

Kurt Vile, Love From Philly Livestream, 5/3/20 (covers John Prine’s “Sam Stone” near the end)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjKG-7d5loY&feature=emb_logo - Jared

“Back in May, Kurt Vile took to his basement for a solo acoustic stream to benefit 30 Amp Circuit, a non-profit dedicated to support the health, wellness, and professional needs of Philadelphia-based musicians and artists. The intimate 3-song set rounded out with a special tribute to the late John Prine, as Kurt did his own rendition of “Sam Stone.”” - J. D.

Radiohead, In Rainbows - From The Basement, 6/4/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWqDIZxO-nU

“This is the one die hard Radiohead fans have been waiting for. This session originally from 2008 existed in some pretty esoteric places and has been almost impossible to find – until now.” - G. A.

Sturgill Simpson, Live at The Ryman Auditorium, 6/5/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kO73im4J2sU

“2020 was supposed to be a banner year for Sturgill, until he got COVID-19 in April. He’s ok now, but something about this performance in the sacred church of country music The Ryman, hits different.” - G. A.

Haim - Women in Music PT. III Live Show, 6/25/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_eJU6X3_jQ

“I love pretty much everything the Haim sisters do - so much so that I aspire to be a sister myself. When I was feeling those very familiar mid-pandemic blues, their “Women in Music PT III” livestream, which celebrated their new album of the same name, was the exact pick me up that I needed. For the first time since March, the 30 minute set made me feel as if I was at an intimate gathering - rather than behind a computer watching a YouTube video along with thousands of others. The stream will have you grooving, laughing, and you may even want to be a Haim sister yourself.” - S. D.

Nilufer Yanya, Boiler Room: Streaming From Isolation with Night Dreamer & Worldwide FM, 6/28/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAaAicIJE7s

“Hauntingly beautiful and yet also somehow grounded, Nilufer Yanya’s June livestream was a special one to watch. It makes the case for how intimate an artist’s performance can be, even virtually.” - G. A.

Brittany Howard, Live From Ryman Auditorium, 10/17/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLH59WLQbZo

“Watching Brittany Howard and her incredible band rip through a set on the Ryman stage like no one and everyone was watching all at once was cathartic. The combination of such a singular artist and historic venue hit a similar nerve to seeing an artist you’re excited about play a show in the flesh with people you love – not an easy feat!” - M. L.

Tkay Maidza - Live on KEXP at Home, 11/3/20

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPJgrDvyRbw

“13 minutes and 11 seconds of pure energy. This livestream is the moment we’ve all been waiting for, and, in my opinion, showcases Maidza as the star that she is. A must-watch if you’re looking for a refreshing and colorful approach to hip-hop.“ - S. D.

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haikumomentsandinspiration · 4 years

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#healthcarevacation, Part III

My last update was on August 25, 2018. So much has happened since then, so there will be at least two more parts to this documentation. If you missed earlier updates, you can read Part I here and Part II here.

First of all, I did come up with a tattoo idea (see my last update) and got one last summer. I had had a challenging spring term in the 2018-2019 school year, and needed to remind myself who I am and what I’m about. So I went to my tattoo artist and asked her to design ”a badass mermaid” for me. A siren that’s feminine and strong (not a skinny blonde mermaid, please!), a siren who looks like she is ready to kick some ass if need be—soft, with hard edges.

And I got just that, along with a tattoo on the side of my belly of a fertility symbol from traditional Turkish kilim patterns.

But let me back up.

After August 2018, after a ton of research, we decided to go with donor egg IVF in Spain. Our patient coordinator at the clinic we chose was lovely and super communicative. She was available via WhatsApp anytime I had a question or anxiety or both, and made sure I knew what the next steps would be and when. I felt well cared for.

During my winter break, I flew to Spain soon before our donor’s egg retrieval to start the treatment. I flew into Barcelona to give myself some time in my favorite city before flying to Valencia. I had a cold right before my trip, and in Barcelona, I started feeling like my cold may in fact be a sinus infection. I was miserable. I managed to go outside, get some fresh ginger, some lemon ginger tea, cough drops, and congestion meds. I needed to get better...STAT.

Two days later, on the day I was to fly to Valencia in the evening and meet Gene at the airport there, I woke up to the news Gene couldn’t fly out to join me that day because his passport wasn’t good for at least 6 months. (Being Turkish, I wondered if someone had “cast the evil eye” on us.) Eventually, Gene was able to miraculously take care of all the paperwork, get an emergency passport renewal, and catch the same exact flight to VLC 24 hours later.

The day after G’s arrival, we took a bus to Gandía for our first appointment at Irema clinic. My uterine lining was still a bit too thin, so they upped my meds, but told me not to worry since I still had a week before the scheduled transfer day. That evening, Gene and I flew to Barcelona to boost morale before the transfer. I was feeling slightly better, but Gene ended up catching my cold. Sigh. Things were just not going as smoothly as I had hoped.

A week later, we headed back to Valencia and then to Irema clinic for my second scan. My lining was still too thin, but other than its thickness, it was looking exactly as it should. They doubled my estrogen dose and postponed my transfer date. I went to the market the next day and shopped for food with a focus on thickening my lining: nuts, avocados, olives, apricots, sardines, chicken broth…My third scan, on December 31, showed my lining was almost there (7.7 mm, with the goal being at least 8 mm thick, so we set the transfer date for January 7. Things were looking up, except I got sick with another cold while still not 100% over the first one, and spent New Year’s Day sick in bed.

Gene left for SF two days later. That he had to go back before transfer day was hard for me. I sent him updates via WhatsApp along the way and tried to stay connected as much as possible (this was a major challenge for me and really got me down). I found an acupuncturist of zero reputation (someone working from home and with no reviews anywhere, which was not unusual in Valencia), but who was very sweet and kind and seemed to know what he was doing, and started seeing him to get my body as ready as possible for the transfer. We had three good quality embryos from our donor, and after much discussion and research, we decided to transfer just one this time, and save two for later for a second attempt or for a sibling later on.

The day before my transfer day, I walked about an hour to the beach, prayed, meditated, and communed with the sea, wishing for a positive outcome the next day. The next day, I found out the embryo we were going to transfer was classified as an A-quality embryo, and my lining was just fine. Transfer was quick and painless, with an all-women team. I went to get fertility acupuncture next to seal the deal, and the next morning, I flew back to San Francisco hopeful, ready for this to finally work.

It didn’t.

But it wasn’t even that simple. The first blood test, my levels came back really low: technically pregnant, but disconcerting if I were indeed pregnant. I was to go back 48 hours later to see if my levels doubled as they were supposed to; we held onto the sliver of hope. But no. Negative. I couldn’t feel the sadness at first — Gene had just started a new job that day after a long stretch of unemployment, so we were celebrating and grateful. Then, a couple of days later, the emotions hit. I felt distant, quiet, impatient...and in need of a new tattoo.

And that’s how the badass mermaid/fertility design tattoos were born.

Fast forward to the summer. After a brief visit to Israel for my grandmother’s 90th birthday, and a week in Istanbul next, I flew back to visit Irema clinic in Spain for the transfer of remaining embryos.

In the meantime, our awesome patient coordinator Lauren had quit her job (some internal drama, which made it sound like she made the absolute right choice). I only found out when I contacted her in preparation for the summer’s transfer to find out what our next steps should be, and had someone named Sergio respond to my text instead of Lauren. He was terrible at communication and not half as knowledgeable as Lauren. It was a very frustrating period, but we had no choice since we still had embryos at the clinic.

July 3, 2019: transfer day! We had decided to transfer both of the remaining embryos this time. We really wanted twins, and if only one took, that was fine, too. We’d figure out what to do about a sibling later. I wasn’t sick this time. I had been upgraded to business class last minute for no apparent reason on my flight over. My lining was where it was supposed to be from the start, and we had two embryos this time. Everything was going smoothly. My sister Rina joined me at the end of my stay in Valencia to help me with my bags, and we went to Barcelona together for my two week wait. All was well; we were joyful and filled with hope.

Because the transfer day happened earlier than I expected compared to our last experience, I had more days in Spain post-transfer than I had anticipated. This meant that I would still be in Spain when I got my blood work results back. I decided I would not delay the wait. I had my blood test done, then went to the beach with Rina. I didn’t swim, just in case I was positive and had to avoid getting an infection. I told G to let me know when he got home from work so I could look at the test result with him on the phone and we could get the news together.

Finally, close to 2 am in Barcelona, with G on the phone, I finally took a look.

Negative.

It was an awful Whatsapp chat. This, we had been convinced, would be the successful one, and it wasn’t. We just sat there, each in our feelings, not sharing them. I felt devastated and alone. Hurt. Mad. Heartbroken. Isolated.

Hours later, when Rina woke up on the morning of her flight back to Istanbul, I told her the news through tears. She said she didn’t want to leave me behind like this; I said I would be fine, and that there wasn’t anything she or anyone could do. I just needed to grieve, and her being there with me or not wouldn’t change anything. Besides, why pay extra money to hang out longer with a depressed sister who doesn’t feel like doing anything except staying in bed crying? Rina went back to her room, made a phone call, and came back to tell me she was staying three more days and that was that. She left to give me some space and to get herself some coffee, and returned a little while later with a bubble wand for me (I am about to cry just thinking about it now.) I got up, blew some bubbles from the balcony of my room towards passersby below. Bubbles have always made me smile. And to my surprise, even under these circumstances they still did.

I got my period a few days later—a few days after Rina had returned to Istanbul and a few days before my own trip back home. That week after the test results and before my flight back to SF, back to Gene was the longest week ever. I tried to make the most of it by finally enjoying all the foods (including ice cream) and alcohol I had been denying myself in Barcelona due to my fertility-friendly diet.

And then, back home, it felt like the longest time ever until I stopped grieving. What finally helped me find a sense of inner calm was to start researching next steps. I started researching clinics in Spain all over again, making phone calls, having Skype chats at all hours of the night (due to the 9-hour time difference), exchanging numerous emails with a number of clinics and their former patients…

Eventually, after I did all that research and laid out everything on a spread sheet, we settled on a clinic in Barcelona and decided to gamble on their birth guarantee/shared risk program. What that means: instead of paying for one cycle (about $9K), you pay a flat fee (about $20K), which gets you three cycles with three different donors and a healthy baby at the end of those, OR all your money back. So the clinic is taking a risk in that they could lose $20K if you don’t have a successful birth by the end. And you take a risk by paying $20K instead of $9K because if the first cycle works, that’s $11K down the drain. We decided it was worth it since I’d had so many failed cycles, including two donor egg transfers thus far. And we figured the clinic would be taking especially good care of us because it would be in their best interest for us to have a successful cycle as soon as possible. Next challenge: figure out how to finance all this. After more research, more emails and more chats with people in various Facebook groups, we settled on a plan and decided to go for it.

December cycles hadn’t been kind to me. I’d had a December cycle with my own eggs in Turkey a few years back, which we had to cancel when my body just didn’t respond to the fertility meds. Our first donor egg transfer in Spain had also failed and was the one cycle when my lining took its time getting to the minimal acceptable thickness for the embryo transfer. Knowing cold weather is not my body’s friend, I was hesitant to start the new cycle with a new clinic in December, but I was also not getting any younger, so there was no time to waste. It was back to Barcelona in December 2019, and this time, Barcelona was the location of the clinic and our only destination, not a short trip between clinic visits in another visit. Everything would be much simpler.

Clarity sure felt good, and knowing what our plan was for up to three cycles (which could span the period of the next two years) was a huge relief to me. I felt so much lighter. I felt hopeful and confident again.

December 2019-January 2020.

Barcelona.

Let’s do this.

To be continued.

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jeremystrele · 3 years

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A Sydney-Meets-Melbourne Family Terrace

Interiors

by Amelia Barnes

Chair, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Artwork ‘A view to the east from a mountain passed’ by artist Mark Howson- M Contemporary @markhowson6 @mcontemporary. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Side table, Spence and Lyda. Butterfly Chair with Leather Sling, Vampt Vintage @vamptvintagedesign. Cushion @coshliving. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Floor lamp, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Side table, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustrali. Ceramic cup, K.H.WURTZ Ondene Double Bay @ondene_doublebay. Ceramic cup, Alana Wilson @alanawilsonstudio. Bowl, Brett Stone, Utopia Art Sydney @brettstoneware @utopia_art_sydney. Artwork ‘A view to the east from a mountain passed’ by artist Mark Howson- M Contemporary @markhowson6 @mcontemporary. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

At bench – kitchen stools, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Leather and timber low stool, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. On lower shelf – Ceramic bowl Donna Green Ceramics @utopiaartsydney. On top shelf – Ceramic Vessel – ‘Ladies Chatting’ Sophie Ceramics @sophie_ceramics. On top shelf – Green Bottle Vase, Damon Moon @moon.damon. On coffee table – Bowl, Brett Stone, Utopia Art Sydney @utopia_art_sydney. Artwork in hallway – Early Morning Fog, by artist Theresa Hunt, Curatorial and Co. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

On high shelf – ‘Small chalk Amphora’ by Katarina Wells @katarinawellsceramic s @curatorialandco. On kitchen bench – White Ceramic Bowl, Rina Menardi @ondene_doublebay. Ceramic Vessel – ‘Ladies Chatting’ Sophie Ceramics @sophie_ceramics. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

At bench – kitchen Stools, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Bowl, Katherine Watson, Utopia Art Sydney @katherinewatson @utopia_art_sydney. On marble bench by window, Ceramic Vase, Alana Wilson @alanawilsonstudio. In butlers pantry on bench – Ceramic Vessel – ‘Ladies Chatting’ Sophie Ceramics @sophie_ceramics. On butlers pantry top shelf – ‘Small chalk Amphora’ by Katarina Wells Wells @katarinawellsceramics. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Leather and timber low stool, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Small artwork – Red II, By Pam French, @project_gallery90. On lower shelf – Vintage Murano Glass Vase @conelyandco. Ceramic bowl Donna Green Ceramics @utopiaartsydney. On top shelf – Ceramic Vessel – ‘Ladies Chatting’ Sophie Ceramics @sophie_ceramics. Green Bottle Vase, Damon Moon @moon.damon. On bench – Ceramic Vessel by Alana Wilson @alanawislonstudio. Marble Bowl, @gregnatale. Artwork in hallway – Early Morning Fog by artist Theresa Hunt, Curatorial and Co. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Ceramic plate by ceramicist Christopher Plumridge. Bowl, @craftvictoria. Ceramic vase, Alana Wilson @alanawilsonstudio. Paint colour Dulux Natural White. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Right image: Artwork clients own. ‘Tipsy Vessel’ by Katarina Wells Wells @katarinawellsceramics @curatorialandco@greatdaneaustralia. Travertine @gstudiohenrywilson. Bowl, Brett Stone, Utopia Art Sydney @brettstoneware @utopia_art_sydney. Vase @ella_bendrups @monderntimes. Bronze sculpture ‘Bungles’, Marea Gazzard @utopiaartsydney. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Ceramic vase, Rina Menardi @ondene_doublebay. Glassware, @montmartestore. Linen napkin, @longcourrierparissydney. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Left image: Bowl, Katherine Watson, Utopia Art Sydney @katherinewatson @utopia_art_sydney. Marble sculpture, Greg Natale @gregnatale. Right image: Towel, Ligne Particulier Oliver Thom @oliver_thom. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

On side table – glass bottle, Space Furniture @spacefurniture. Ceramic vase, Alana Wilson @alanawilsonstudio. Quilt and blanket, Society Limonta, Ondene Double Bay @ondene_doublebay. Bowl, Brett Stone, Utopia Art Sydney @utopia_art_sydney. Paint colour Dulux Basic Coral. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

Artwork on wall, ‘There is no way I am taking your teaspoon of caster oil’ by artist Kerrie Oliver, @kerrieoliver @curatorialandco. Glass Vase, Alana Wilson @alanawilsonstudio. Quilt and blanket, Society Limonta, Ondene Double Bay @ondene_doublebay. Pink bowl, Katherine Watson, Utopia Art Sydney @Katherinewatson @utopia_art_sydney. Table lamp, Great Dane Australia @greatdaneaustralia. Paint colour Dulux Basic Coral. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

The maintained Victorian facade. Photo – Prue Ruscoe. Styling – Claire Driscoll Delmar

The owners of this Bondi terrace have lived in Sydney over a decade, but wanted the design of their home to reflect their Melbourne origins.

Full Of Grace Interiors was tasked with updating the home aesthetically, while also reconfiguring the ground floor to better utilise available space.

‘The original ground floor comprised numerous dead spaces, so the layout was reconfigured to introduce both informal and formal living and dining areas, with the addition of a rumpus room, a new bathroom, laundry, and guest bedroom,’ explains Therese Carrodus, interior designer and owner of Full Of Grace Interiors.

The interiors draw on Melbourne design sensibilities both in their look and feel, allowing the clients to recreate cosy dinners previously spent in Melbourne, around an open fire. The dining room with its original Victorian fireplace captures this intent with its sumptuous built-in banquette seating, black timber detailing, fluted glass and subdued blue palette reminiscent of a Melbourne restaurant aesthetic.

Other spaces are light-filled and more relaxed, indicative of the home’s beachside setting. For example, the open-plan kitchen and living area is a refreshingly bright haven introducing natural light from the rear garden, while the bathroom and rumpus room showcases playful yet sophisticated blush hues (Dulux Basic Coral among them). There’s also dramatic moments facilitated in the ice green kitchen marble, and deep red deep-crimson velvet curtains in the guest bedroom.

‘I also wanted to reference the Bondi locale and climate by drawing in the natural light from the sun drenched rear garden and by selecting a palette that is relaxed and unpretentious,’ says Therese. ‘I like that each of the rooms has its own flavour.’

Executing this vision had its challenges, given the narrow site with no side or rear access, but has ultimately resulted in a home the clients adore. Therese describes the completed project as an ‘observation in colour, texture and light’ creating contrasting moods within zoned areas, while reflecting this family’s past and present.

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milkdoie · 3 years

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tag game.

use this picrew to make urself!

thank u for the tag @lovnde!! i’ll be tagging @yamyang @poeticnotions @chocolvte @wondersung + anyone else who wants to try!! (no pressure)

here’s mine <3

they didn’t have the option for overgrown side bangs so i went with what was closest to what i look like irl :) ALSO PLS TELL ME U GUYS UNDERSTAND THAT IM LAUGHING IN THIS RIGHT? i feel like it could be mistaken for crying but i promise i was trying to convey laughter HIVJSK

#ii. rina results.#i look pretty here tho #... kinda misleading HAJAHAJA

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recentanimenews · 5 years

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DanMachi II – 12 (Fin) – A Goddess’ Love

While last week’s cliffhanger, in which Bell, Hestia, and Ais literally fell off a cliff, hinted at more action and peril in the finale, we end up with no such thing. My expectations were duly subverted; thank you, DanMachi! The episode skips to the part where Ais has already effortlessly saved everyone, and Hestia is in bed recovering from a fever.

They end up in a gorgeous mountain village, whose mayor Karm and daughter Rina are more than happy to host a goddess. When Rina proves more than capable of taking care of her, Hestia puts Bell to work helping the villagers prepare for their harvest festival. Ais joins him, donning some very fetching village garb.

So…what’s the twist? Isn’t everyone in this village a bit too kind? When does the other shoe drop? Well, it doesn’t. Bell and Ais never encounter any more enemies, be they Ares’ children or anyone else. The village doesn’t even have a dark secret; the scales of the legendary Black Dragon are on proud display for all to see, their mere presence keeping monsters away and enabling the village to prosper. Ais gives them the stink-eye, but that’s all.

The lack of any classic conflict allows the episode to be a meditation on the goddess-child relationship, represented in the present by Hestia and Bell, and in the past by Karm and his goddess Brigid. Once a brash young adventurer himself, he and Brigid loved one another, so much so that she saved his life at the cost of returning to heaven.

Filled with grief and regret, he swore never to take a wife and instead adopted Rina, who keeps him going. But as his life continues to wind down, he impresses upon Bell the importance of honoring and protecting his goddess at all costs.

Bell takes that to heart when a recovered Hestia joins him and Ais at the festival. Rather than bookending DanMachi with Bell-Ais dances, Bell remembers Karm’s words and how he spurned Hestia last week by saying the wrong thing, and formally asks her for a dance.

The fun is interrupted by Rina, who brings Hestia back to speak to Karm, who is very near death. While everyone around her is weeping, Hestia maintains an ethereal calm about the whole thing, keeping things light and upbeat as she speaks to Karm.

Turns out she and Brigid were best friends (though, like Loki she used to call her a shrimp), and she lets her hair down so Karm can see her as Brigid with his failing eyes, calling him to join her in heaven. Bell can’t help but weep as Hestia shuts the departed Karm’s eyes—he can’t help but see his own future in the scene.

Bell wanders off on his own, but is soon found by Hestia, who suspects he’s worried about their very lifespans and resultant perspectives on time. But she tells him not to overthink things. If he wants to be with her—and he very much does—then there’s nothing to worry about. She’ll be with him, all throughout his life, even when he grows old.

Even when his soul rises to heaven, is wiped clean, and returns to earth as someone else. She’ll simply find that person and ask them to be in her Familia. There’s no need to fear their love for each other, because even if his body isn’t eternal, she, and that love, most certainly are.

With that, Bell, Hestia, and Ais return to Orario. They vow to return to the village—I can’t blame them, place was super-cozy—and Ais has Bell promise to bring her along, inviting Hestia’s ire. Haruhime invites it too when she welcomes bell home with a big hug.

As action-packed, world-changing finales go, this…wasn’t that. In a way, it was something better—or at least far truer to what a goddess like Hestia is all about: the warmth and comfort of the hearth, and the kindness and love of a happy home.

By: magicalchurlsukui

#Anime #News #RABUJOI – An Anime Blog

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magicmorningmeteora · 7 years

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2017 Q1 Roundup

Other 2017 Roundups: Q1 | Q2 | Q3 | Q4 You can find more roundups at the Publishing Schedule page!

Greetings, Citizens of the Universe!

It’s been 7,344,000 seconds (about 2 months, 26 days) since the year’s been ushered in. A lot has happened since then so let’s take a look before heading into the new quarter, yes?

We began the year with the commemorative 4000 Visitors post starring Melon Kinenbi.

In light of news that Aikawa Maho’s panic disorder diagnosis and resultant sick leave, fans came together to give Aiai a message of support.

After that, I spotlighted an Okinawa-based group... of elderly ladies. Come on and dance and One More Time!

The week after that came the main event of the quarter: the long-awaited reviews of the 2016 Fall Releases!

Dou Datte Ii no / Namida no Request – Country Girls

Umaku Ienai / Ai no Tame Kyou Made Shinkashite Kita Ningen, Ai no Tame Subete Taikashite Kita Ningen / Wasurete Ageru – ANGERME

Dream Road ~Kokoro ga Odoridashiteru~ / KEEP ON Joshou Shikou!! / Ashita Yarou wa Bakayarou – Juice=Juice

Mugen Climax / Ai wa Maru de Seidenki / Singing ~Ano Koro no You ni~ – ℃-ute

Sexy Cat no Enzetsu / Mukidashi de Mukiatte / Sou ja nai – Morning Musume ’16

In between all of this, there were some good and bad news. The good news is that Chuu!Sugoi!Idol announced their C-ute tribute! The bad news was that Ebichu member Matsuno Rina passed away a few days before Valentine’s Day. In addition to the ANGERME review, there was a special post dedicated to her.

And that’s just the beginning! Who knows what news and releases will come around (especially with the 200th post around the corner)?

Stay tuned for more at Magic Morning Meteora! You can support it via the following methods:

Subscribe to the RSS feed or follow the blog (either on Wordpress, on Tumblr at magicmorningmeteora, or on Facebook).

Take a look at the gallery for art specially created for the blog, which will often be posted there first before going on any other platform. (Given the new theme it will have, expect that page to be updated more.)

Leave a word or two at the Magic Box for the Public Vox, either on M3 or on Tumblr.

Most importantly, remember to share the love! As magically meteoric as I am, the blog’s real magic comes from the audience. (The various surveys’ results shows and projects would have been impossible without you.) What’s a blog and blogger without readers so thank you for your support and spread the love!

Let’s makes 2017 more awesome than any other years (bad news be darned).

#quarter 1 #blog post roundup #jpop #hello project

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haikumomentsandinspiration · 4 years

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#healthcarevacation, part IV

Today is Sunday, May 10, 2020: Mother’s Day. (I like that in Turkish, the name of the day is Mothers’ Day—plural. I prefer that.)

This felt like the appropriate time to sit down and catch up with the documentation of this long journey.

If you need to catch up, you can read Part I here, Part II here, and Part III here.

So where were we? Ah, yes. December 2019. The pregnancy/birth guarantee program at Fertty International Clinic in Barcelona, Spain.

In my research looking for a new clinic after the last failed transfer (and the poor communication after staffing changes at our old clinic), one thing became clear: G. needed to have more tests and analyses done to try to figure out why all these transfers, including a donor egg cycle with two transfers, had failed.

After much struggle trying (in vain) to have Kaiser cover the tests and analyses Gene and I needed to have done, we realized it was going to be cheaper and easier for Gene to fly solo to Spain in November to get all that done. He would come back to SF, we would wait about three weeks for the test results, and then, based on the test results, we would finalize the protocol for me and the embryo transfer.

Thankfully, G’s results came back normal, everything within expected ranges and levels. So our application to the birth guarantee/shared risk program was officially approved. I would go to Barcelona (solo this time) at the start of my winter break, have a first scan to check my lining, adjust my medication as needed, and get ready for transfer day in about a week.

On December 10, G and I went out for sushi in San Francisco one last time (we hoped) before pregnancy, and a week later, I left for Barcelona. My first check up at Fertty the day after my flight was mostly just blood work and an initial scan to see how my lining was coming along. The lining was fine, but surprise, surprise: I was getting sick with a cold—December flights/weather change were working their magic on me again. My doctor asked to see me in a couple of days, and told me to keep the clinic updated on my health. Two days later, my cold had gotten worse, but my lining was still all right. I spent the rest of the day looking for a reputable and affordable acupuncturist (the second part being the challenge), and thanks to a friend’s rec, I made an appointment, with a focus not on uterine lining support this time, but on kicking this cold’s ass before transfer day.

I took it easy that week, feeling no pressure to do any sightseeing since my priority was the healthcare part of this #healthcarevacation without a doubt. I feasted (!) on soup, bone broth, and hot tea and not much else for several days, and slowly started getting better. My clinic decided to keep my transfer day as scheduled: December 27. Meanwhile, Rina joined me again in Barcelona for a few days for emotional support leading up to transfer day (she doesn’t need much of an excuse to travel, especially to Barcelona).

December 27: Transfer Day! I went to the Fertty for my final blood work before the transfer and to sign some papers. Then, off to fertility acupuncture, and back to the clinic for my transfer. Everything went smoothly; we transferred one embryo this time, with four more good quality embryos left for future attempts/a sibling, so I was feeling good and positive. Besides, their recovery/rest room was the most comfortable one I’d been in in all these cycles at three different clinics. After resting a bit, I went out for lunch, then headed back to my acupuncturist for a post-transfer fertility acupuncture session. Stick, baby, stick!

I took it easy the rest of the time I was in Barcelona. Went out for a walk at least once a day, but had lazy days for the most part.

On New Year’s Eve, the woman I was staying with, Renata, and I went for a late lunch at her favorite Brazilian Bistro (she’s from Brazil). And for dinner, we decided to go to my favorite Turkish restaurant, which I knew would be open till late with their regular menu and would not be charging an arm and a leg for a modified menu. After lunch, Renata, another Brazilian friend of hers, and I walked to the beach for a Brazilian ritual honoring Iemanja (Brazilian spelling). We made wishes, prayed, meditated, and threw yellow and white carnations to the sea for Iemanja, then sat together and watched the sunset. I felt so grateful to be invited to join this ritual (this will be my new cultural appreciation vs. cultural appropriation example the next time I teach that class!). Ever since I’ve known about her, I’ve always felt drawn to Iemanja—being a Pisces and considering my home to be the sea more than any piece of land and all. I felt at peace, and all felt right in the world in a way that I hadn’t felt for a while during this long fertility journey.

I took it easy the next day. And the day after that, the morning of January 3, I had some spotting...very faint, but still spotting. I called G. and cried on the phone. But as he said, we were not out yet. I let Fertty know, too; they said they would up my progesterone dosage and monitor me closely. I had a big lunch and a late dinner that day. Big mistake. I woke up around 3:30 am, nauseated, and threw up twice. In the morning, my spotting had gotten slightly darker, but it was still not heavy spotting and definitely not considered bleeding. I went up from 600 to 800 mg of progesterone a day, and followed the BRAT diet—well, just the R part. The following day, I was feeling better, and finally went outside and played tourist. Surrounding myself with the beauty of Barcelona felt healing. Meanwhile, my clinic told me I could come by the morning before my flight back home for a blood test so they could tell me sooner than later both the result and what the next steps would be. If I weren’t pregnant, I didn’t want to keep taking all those pills and patches loaded with hormones.

January 7, 2020: pregnancy test day! A year ago today was transfer day at Irema clinic, I noticed. I had a glimmer of hope, but no gut feeling either way. I repeated the lesson I had learned from a guided meditation that had been helping me a ton: there is hope in uncertainty! I distracted myself by finally sitting my ass down and doing some lesson planing for my cultural competence/equity literacy unit. In the middle of that, around 2:30 pm came the phone call from the clinic. “Do you want me to tell you on the phone or do you want to come in?” I didn’t want to go in just to hear “I’m sorry...” and I wasn’t sure I wanted a hug. You can just tell me now, I said, bracing myself.

And that’s how I found out I was pregnant.

I don’t remember the exact words the patient coordinator said. I just remember it took a second for it to sink in, and then I started crying while still somehow continuing the conversation and smiling from ear to ear. I finished up my work, and headed to the beach for sunset, which was my plan whether it was positive or negative. Whether I had to celebrate or grieve, I wanted to do it facing the sea.

I went to the beach, watched the sunset, thanked Iemanja, thanked the Universe, and recorded an “IVF Log” video, which I assumed we would eventually share with our baby.

At this point, you may have noticed I didn’t call G as soon as I heard. The next day, January 8th, was my flight back, and the day of our first date 11 years ago. The plan was to tell him in person—our anniversary gift.

When I arrived home, I didn’t let him know I already knew. I didn’t know if he knew that I knew. We had decided on no anniversary presents this year since we had plenty of medical expenses. Turns out G got me a couple of gifts. I would have been upset with him when we had said we weren’t doing presents. Instead, I went to the bathroom, took the pregnancy tests I’d been saving for this day, then went back to the living room, saying I did have some presents for him from Spain. I gave him the couple of small gifts I had gotten for him from Barcelona. Then, I said I realized there was one more thing, and went back and got the pregnancy tests.

The adventure didn’t end there, leaving its place to a blissful period. I had some bleeding week 7 and week 8, and ended up going in for five ultrasounds in those two weeks, freaking out each time since that’s around the same time in my pregnancy and the exact way my miscarriage had begun back in 2016. Each visit, though, instead of the “I’m sorry...there’s no heartbeat” of 2016, we heard “there’s the heartbeat” and exhaled, immensely grateful. After week 8, all was well, but I remained cautious and scared, and didn’t want to share the news with anyone other than family for a while.

Then, the month after my return from Spain, of course: a global pandemic! We were handling all the challenges of this fertility journey so well, apparently, that the Universe thought, “Here, how about a global pandemic during your pregnancy in case things seem too easy now?” “Awesome,” I thought sarcastically; “what perfect timing.” Then, I realized: wait...this IS perfect timing. I came back from Spain, and not long after, Spain was suddenly one of the epicenters of the pandemic, one of the first countries that took significant precautions. This pregnancy did have perfect timing for real. I feel for women whose cycles had to be canceled or postponed.

Today, Mother’s Day, is exactly 22 weeks into my pregnancy—we are more than halfway there to our estimated September 13, 2020 due date. So it feels like it’s a good time to share the news at last.

I want to say that I do not take this pregnancy for granted—especially with the context of a global pandemic and how it has impacted assisted fertility cycles in mind. Each day, I thank the Universe “for this healthy pregnancy—for all the healthy days so far, and all the healthy days to come.” Each time I light a Shabbat candle, I pray not just for my own family and friends’ health, but also for all who are pregnant, and for all who are trying to get pregnant. I had thought that after almost five years of trying to conceive, when we finally succeeded, we would have celebration and community...and hugs! Instead, we found a global pandemic, isolation, distance from our loved ones, and more than the usual dose of a new parent’s fear of the unknown. Last month, I spent a lot of time crying upon slowly realizing all the things I wasn’t going to get in this pregnancy:

- being pregnant out and about in the world and experiencing what that’s like, even with all its irritations (people trying to touch my belly, people not giving their seat up for me on public transportation...); watching people slowly notice it at work...

- looking at baby stuff in person with G.: “OMG...Look at this one! Isn’t this soooo cute?!?”

- an all gender (in-person) celebration/party with our family/friends in July or August (silver lining, I guess, is that family/friends who aren’t in the Bay Area can attend the Zoom party now...whatever that will look like);

- going to Turkey in June one last time in a while before the baby comes; being pregnant on a beach in Turkey; going baby stuff shopping with my family in Turkey; eating all the amazing food in Turkey and knowing it was nourishing not just my soul, but also our baby.

- having my parents’ hands on my pregnant belly, feeling the kicks of their first grandchild;

- coming back from Turkey with my mom, who wanted to come for a visit before the baby to help us get ready at home;

- the September visit from both my parents; possibly having my mother in the delivery room, and knowing my dad is in the waiting room, being anxious and impatient; wondering if Rina could make it, even, and if she could, knowing she would be taking some amazing newborn photos.

Gratitude has been my savior this whole time, and it still is. I know we will have time with my parents, my sister, and my in-laws as they each meet our baby in person eventually, and we will all make beautiful, sweet memories. I know there was a time when there was no FaceTime that would allow a partner who’s not allowed to be at the anatomy scan to still be there virtually. I know there was a time there was no anatomy scan via ultrasound. I could go on.

There is so much to be grateful for still. Thank you, Universe, for this healthy pregnancy—for all the healthy days so far, and all the ones to come.

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enzuigiripuro · 6 years

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Ice Ribbon Results from June 2018

- 6/2 Ribbon Dojo, Saitama (18:00) #889 * (W)Akane Fujita, Mochi Miyagi def. (L)Uno Sukiie (Uno Matsuya), Maika Ozaki - POM Juice (13:34) * Maya Yukihi def. Hyoketsu Saya (Tequila Saya) - Wheelwind (8:11) * (W)Miyako Matsumoto, Tsukushi def. (L)Satsuki Totoro, Risa Sera - Miyakoko Clutch (10:27) * (W)Ibuki Hoshi, Hamuko Hoshi def. (L)Giulia, Tsukasa Fujimoto - Diving Body Press (12:53) - 6/6 Ribbon Dojo, Saitama (19:30) - P’s Party Round 5 (46 Fans) * (W)Uno Matsuya, Satsuki Totoro def. (L)Giulia, Ryo Mizunami - Cross Armbreaker (15:35) * Tsukushi def. Rina Shingaki - Diving Footstomp (7:42) * (W)Misaki Ohata, Tequila Saya def. (L)Asahi, Maika Ozaki - Diving Body Press (12:57) - 6/10 Ribbon Dojo, Saitama (18:00) #890 * Tsukushi def. Asahi - Twinkle Sister Lock (5:55) * 3 Way : Satsuki Totoro def. (L)Uno Matsuya vs. Tequila Saya - Backslide (6:36) * (W)Kyuri, Miyako Matsumoto def. (L)Giulia, Maya Yukihi - Blockbuster Hold (11:38) * (W)Hamuko Hoshi, Mochi Miyagi def. (L)Maika Ozaki, Tsukasa Fujimoto - Diving Body Press (14:15) - 6/16 Edion Arena #2, Osaka (12:00) - Osaka Ribbon 2018 II (Double Broadcast - Niconico & SamuraiTV) (594 Fans) * Exhibition : Suzu (New Rookie) vs. Satsuki Totoro - Draw (3:00) * (W)Ibuki Hoshi, Kyuri def. (L)Tequila Saya, Uno Matsuya - Hamuroll (10:04) * (W)Tsukushi, Arisa Nakajima, Asahi def. (L)Giulia, Rina Yamashita, Yoshiko - Diving Foot Stomp (14:27) * Satsuki Totoro def. Itsuki Aoki - Lariato (6:34) * International Ribbon Tag Team Championship : Azure Revolution (Risa Sera, (W)Maya Yukihi) - V7 © def. (L)Miyako Matsumoto, Hideki Suzuki - Snowtone Bomb (12:34) * Kurumi Hiragi, Mochi Miyagi, (W)Akane Fujita def. (L)Maika Ozaki, Saori Anou, Tae Honma - Frog Splash (14:53) * IceXInfinity Championship : Tsukasa Fujimoto def. Hamuko Hoshi © - V1 - Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex Hold (18:36) TITLE CHANGE!! ~ Info : The Lovely Butcher (Hamuko, Mochi) attempted a challenge to Azure Revolution for Tag Belt and Match decided on 7/1 in Sapporo which the stipulation if Lovely Butcher lose, Lovely Butcher will disbanded as a tag team. And Kurumi will take on Fujimoto for her first title defense on 7/8 at Korakuen Hall, Tokyo. - 6/20 Ribbon Dojo, Saitama (19:00) - P’s Party Round 6 (44 Fans) * Exhibition : Tequila Saya vs. Suzu - Draw (3:00) * Ryo Mizunami def. Satsuki Totoro - Diving Guillotine Drop (11:13) * Cherry def. Giulia - Spring Night Love (7:44) * (W)Tsukushi, Tequila Saya def. Hiroe Nagahama, (L)Uno Matsuya - Diving Footstomp (10:26) - 6/23 Ribbon Dojo, Saitama (13:00) #892 (112 Fans) * (W)Kyuri, Maika Ozaki def. (L)Giulia, Tsukasa Fujimoto - Sasorigatame (11:09) * (W)Hamuko Hoshi, Mochi Miyagi def. (L)Uno Matsuya, Tsukushi - Body Press (12:13) * Akane Fujita def. Miyako Matsumoto - Mikan de Pon (5:46) * Azure Revolution ((W)Risa Sera, Maya Yukihi) def. (L)Tequila Saya, Satsuki Totoro - Schwein Buster (12:39) - 6/30 Sapporo Susukino Mars Gym, Hokkaido (13:00) - #893 Sapporo Ribbon 2018 Tag 1 (164 Fans) * Exhibition : Tequila Saya vs. Suzu - Draw (3:00) * Maika Ozaki def. Giulia - Towerhacker Bomb (6:52) * 3 Way : Miyako Matsumoto def. (L)Uno Matsuya vs. Tsukushi - Miyakoko Clutch (6:18) * Kyuri def. Tae Honma - Blockbuster Hold (6:03) * Maya Yukihi, (W)Tequila Saya def. (L)Satsuki Totoro, Mochi Miyagi - Gran Maestro de Tequila (10:29) * (W)Hamuko Hoshi, Kurumi Hiragi def. (L)Akane Fujita, Risa Sera - Diving Body Press (14:38) * Tsukasa Fujimoto def. Ibuki Hoshi - Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex Hold (14:48)

#iceribbon

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silverdrecms · 7 years

Note

▲ ( w/ yk who. rip )

▲ five time my muse thought about kissing yours, and the one time they did.

i. the scent of recently mowed grass, the sun beaming down just outside of the shadow of her favourite tree and a gentle breeze generally associated with the late october weather were all too familiar occurrences in kerry’s designated area of the quad — unofficial and inclusive, of course. it had become something of a tradition if you will, a cozy spot when staying within the walls of chi omega or the library seemed like an act of betrayal to the outdoors, and one that she often shared with her group of friends. it hadn’t been a recent development; the squad had been a fixture in her life for about a year now, upon meeting chaerin in person for the very first time and subsequently being introduced to daehyun, the others coming along almost as if it were one by one until jaewon had finally joined them all. that being said, she classified yeseul as being out of bounds with that specific circle, more of a solo bond between the two which puzzled almost everyone… kerry included every once in a while. sitting beside her in this instance was none other than jeremy. it was strange, how she would never fess up to the crush that she had like she would the others — because it was no secret that she was quick to develop a fleeting… thing, attraction to those around her, but at least it had passed as soon as it came with the others, but with jett — she was quick to halt that train of thought, realizing that she had perhaps zoned out while incidentally staring at him for far too long, looking back down at her economics notes. it was peaceful between the two, for once, as studying was a bore more often than not and he seemed to keep the mood light with whatever came to mind, eliciting a laugh from ker and resulting in a conversation that left them completely sidetracked, so the solitude was comfortable for as long as it was bound to last.

gaze flickering back up, her brown eyes locked on his tattooed left arm, studying the art curiously and trying to determine herself what meaning each design could hold to him — if they held meaning at all. this led to a slow visual trail to his clothed bicep, his shoulder, his neck, and finally his side profile; the guy knew he was handsome, commenting on it when they would all hang out in one of the houses only for a simultaneous eye roll from the other six to follow, and looking at him now, it was as if said allure became inhuman with each run-in or movie night with the rest of the group they had. it didn’t help that he was always so kind to her, texting her about some upcoming art exhibit or tke party before he would the others, making it seem like her presence was truly desired… it was different from what dae or sungie would ask of her or convince her to do, at least that’s what it had felt like despite it all being similar at times, so she couldn’t find a reason why she wouldn’t have developed some kind of attraction to the man beside her over the course of the last month or two. and it was in that line of thinking that she wondered what would happen if she moved closer, if her tendency to hold back with these crushes of hers should be tossed aside to chance so much as a more intimate touch than what they had shared before, to chance even kissing him. maybe he was interested too, maybe if she knelt in front of him, leaned in closer — no. staring at jett’s lips, ker quickly ducked her head back down to her notes, because he was something of a flirt; even if his intentions were pure, she couldn’t risk reading into this incorrectly, not when he was such a welcomed presence in her life, and especially not when she was entangled with someone else… even if it was merely for benefits as opposed to what felt right, to a real relationship, it was still a commitment and acting on that impulse that still had shivers of nervousness lingering beneath the surface of her skin was simply a means to hurting others and herself in the end. she may have seemed to find competitive market equilibrium interesting, however her mind was still on that sudden urge, and it wouldn’t stray very far from that for the duration of their time together.

ii. movie night had become almost as sacred as family dinners, nights of terrified squealing or soundless laughs perhaps ranking second on ker’s list of favourite group activities — likely because a film that could choke up anyone in the room was an immediate no, so the lack of dramas had put her off in the slightest. tonight was another comedy marathon, as the slasher flicks they’d watched last weekend had been… excessive, for the squeamish and the easily frightened, the younger of the two girls present being among the latter. settling into a back couch with some white cheddar popcorn and lemonade and her brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, she moved to lean against the left armrest to make room for jett and chae, who followed suit rather quickly. with the man sitting beside her on the cramped version of the two couches, she braced herself for their thighs touching, leaning against his arm, anything that would involve physicality of some sort. was it possible for her little crush to get worse ? because ker was sure that it had, as she could never tell if she fully welcomed the contact or feared it as of late, discreetly fidgeting with her fingers to calm her nerves — as if biting her lip would be enough. eyes fixed on the screen, she was thankful for the commencement of a distraction, though she knew that eventually it would be useless, especially when she was already paying too much mind to their knees being pressed together. if this persisted, she wasn’t sure if she would get used to the feeling of her face flushing more than it had in the past, whether she’d be more composed and careful in these situations from here on out. god, she could only hope so.

minutes passed, the slow build-up to the good jokes prompting awkward laughter at first and very little attention to the movie for the time being. it was during this time that ker spared a glance at jett, what with the sides of their bodies all but pressed together making her antsy. she always looked at his face in these moments, not just because of the physical attraction held, but also to decipher what he was thinking, much like she would the others if given the chance. however it was hard to say if what he held in his gaze was subtle interest in the film or lazy indifference; so it was no surprise that her eyes would drift elsewhere, past the slope of his nose and down to his plump lips, a quiet inhale deemed necessary as another thought of kissing him crossed her mind. they looked soft, biting on the inside of her own lip at the realization when she noticed chaerin’s head turned in her direction, kerry’s eyes now moving to her. and at the coy look on the elder’s face, she looked back to the screen, sinking into the cushions with a flush gracing the apples of her cheeks. if there was anything worse than harbouring a crush like the petulant girl she thought herself to be in this situation, it was getting caught by the likes of her friends. and after this incident, she dreaded the moment that hyunnie would find out.

iii. and find out they did. they had been relentlessly teasing her day in and day out once they found out and had been flaunting the supposed knowledge of whatever feelings she had being reciprocated. she didn’t believe them, it was as simple as that; not because she thought dae to be dishonest, but because if that were in fact true, she would have expected it to come directly from jeremy as opposed to it being word of mouth. thus, dressed up in a sangria-toned crop top and black skirt with her hair half up deemed appropriate for the nightclub they had settled on going to the night before, she had done her best to avoid engaging in a conversation focused on the latter by spending the group’s night out challenging rhee liver of steel taemin to a drinking game — and losing miserably — before dragging chae to the dance floor and trying to nudge her in the direction of every attractive stranger that had been checking her out. how the hours could pass by so quickly shocked kerry as she was gripping the brunette by her forearm for stability, led out to the car by a sober jaewon. working out who sat where when there were only five seats was rather troublesome, though it went without saying that the girls would be the ones to sit on one of the boys’ laps. it turned out to not be a difficult decision, as rina took dae’s lap out of accessibility, leaving ker to take jeremy’s for the same reason, as they had taken both seats beside the door while jaesung was stuck in the middle and jaewon and taemin took the driver and passenger’s seats respectively. curling into the man who had become something of a makeshift seat for her, the blonde spoke enthusiastically for the first ten minutes of their drive about the importance of lil sebastian to the entirety of parks and recreation as if he weren’t a fleeting mention throughout the seasons, fingers absentmindedly playing with the hair on the nape of jett’s neck. it hadn’t taken long for her to realize what she was doing — at least once she had wrapped up her spiel — and she didn’t cease right away, finding it entertaining if anything. but at some point, upon recalling whose hair it was that she was playing with, she remembered what she had been wanting to do for a while and discreetly bit her lip at the thought of getting it over with, something that could be so innocent and harmless taking all but a moment to do with complete disregard of dae or the others spectating.

it would be so easy to kiss him right now, in the state that she was in — fuck, it was all that she could think about with her current one track mind, what with her taking as long as she had to follow through. she could always pass it off as nothing more than a drunken desire to plant her lips on the nearest person if it came back to bite her in the ass, that it had just been chance that he had fallen susceptible to the move. all that she had to do was edge a little closer, pivot her head and finally get this desire to lock lips with the tattooed charmer over with. hell, she was this close to having her nose brush his, thinking it to be now or never, or at least until the next time she’d get the encouragement she needed in the form of some raspberry vodka-infused beverage — only for the van to hit a bump and have her just avoiding smacking her head on the roof of the vehicle, a melody of delayed curses flowing from the mouths of the inebriated passengers. the minuscule amount of air gained was enough for her to find herself sitting more on jaesung’s lap than jett’s, a disappointed pout freely expressed, especially with the latter’s gaze fixed on the immediate ranting courtesy of tae and jaewon — perhaps one of the only times the two wouldn’t have said ranting directed at one another, thank fuck — she looked up to sungie, who sported a distant smile thanks to the alcohol in his system and had an arm lazily wrapped around her waist to keep her steady. the pout was soon gone and replaced with a grin as she cuddled into her friend, the moment of regret disappearing almost as soon as it came. but come the morning, when it all came rushing back, her hands wouldn’t be covering her face because of the headache and light sensitivity plaguing her. as if she’d ever work up the nerve to come close to that again.

iv. how a teasing comment over text a few months prior led to this still rendered kerry almost speechless. even as she waited for his train to arrive, taking up temporary residence on a shabby bench in the lobby of penn station, it still hadn’t occurred to her that he’d come here to visit her, to meet her family, all because of a sext gone awry. eyes roaming the expansive area for any sign of those familiar brown locks, she pursed her lips when there was no sight of him, looking back down to her phone to text yeseul back about some disastrous hookup she didn’t care to know about. a wince at the mention of a sad attempt at bondage and a rumoured sti circus with the guy in question melted into a look of both surprise and embarrassment as jett now stood before her, a duffle bag slung over his shoulder as he looked at her expectingly. quick to shove her phone in her purse as the messages became more explicit and unnecessary, she grinned and greeted him accordingly, jumping to her feet to embrace him for the first time since winter semester had ended and the group had gone home for a few weeks to spend time with family — only to live with each other for the duration of the summer in just three weeks’ time. her smile weakened upon pulling away, though it held the same warmth as she led him away from the swarm of bodies departing pittsburgh for the weekend and out to the parking lot, the long stroll to her 2012 honda accord filled with brief mentions of more recent developments regarding their time off that were further elaborated upon on the drive to her house — along with a few warnings about her parents’ very different approaches to meeting her friends.

he definitely heeded her advice from months previous, performing minor tasks such as helping her mom by reaching for ingredients for dinner from a higher shelf and setting the table to get in the woman’s good graces, thus earning himself a somewhat approving look from the matriarch — to which ker breathed a sigh of relief, remembering jaewon’s struggle in winning over the woman, which he had ultimately succeeded in. and now, as they could have come straight out of a rom-com by washing and drying the dishes together, a quick congratulations left her lips, leaving the two to chuckle as the blonde passed him another plate to wipe with a dish towel. in that moment, she realized how cliché this setup was, looking off to the side before foolishly delving into this entire task becoming a typical scene between love interests — only to roll her eyes at such a thought and to keep going, a wine glass being her next object to scrub. minutes pass with light banter and their focus solely on finishing this task quickly, fingers pruning already, only to find just a knife left in the murky dishwater, ker’s fingers taking hold of the handle and continuing on as she had before; the only difference now was that she had looked at jeremy upon handing it over, realizing just how domestic this all was, much like it would be back at their house in kent, and she soon found herself thinking a little too much about what that meant. of course, it was just two friends looking after the rest of the squad, as not to allow them all to starve, however it still made her body feel a little warmer and lighter, a shy smile fought back by a more teasing one as she really looked at him. that damn desire to plant her lips on his was back with a cruel vengeance, like it always had since that night of partying, only it wouldn’t feel as long as it normally did when the thought struck her, it was impossible with the personalities that lived under that very roof — as her parents came barging into the kitchen, ranting about another issue with that bitch susan in japanese and had her almost jumping out of her skin at the sudden outburst. head turned back to the dishwater merely to empty the sink, she hid her blush as best as she could, damning her mind for generating such a thought once more.

v. kyong daehyun was truly testing her, she should have known by the glint in their eye that they’d set these specific pairings up by all but shooing sungie away before he could join in on body shots. it was another night out, only the group had found themselves a private sitting area — to which kerry feigned surprise, as if she hadn’t sorted that out earlier just for the hell of it — and tae and rina had counted themselves out, avoiding the club altogether supposedly taking precedence with the man while the latter was simply dealing with seulie’s bullshit once more, a bad mood imminent knowing how dysfunctional their dynamic could be. thus the five set out on having a couple of rounds of shots and making a bad decision here or there before they too would have to sacrifice such freedoms for exhaustive shifts at work and the like. how they had decided on body shots was beyond ker, aside from the fact that it had been suggested by jaesung, and dae all but ensuring that her and jeremy were paired together made it all the more surprising — while being completely predictable all the same. and with them and jaewon being the other couple in this insinuated competition, there really was no way for her to back out, not when sungie was now more than content to wait his turn, if he’d ever even get it. so, because kerry’s possible exposure had become a priority to the other duo for completely different reasons in this instance — because her stripping out of her black dress with a hem that landed mid-thigh in the middle of a club was a definite no as it stood — she’d be the one to take the shot; her slight flush wasn’t caused by her partner being shirtless on one of the tables upon determining what each pair was to do, but by the entire setup of the situation. it was on her to sprinkle the salt along his toned abdomen, focused just below where his diaphragm would be to make it simpler on the easily flustered and still only tipsy blonde, as they waited for the okay to start with the shot next to his hip. she looked at jaesung — straddling her partner’s thighs for the time being — until he gave the go ahead, quickly leaning down to lick the grains off of jett’s skin with her flattened tongue, blonde curls getting in the way, before following up with the shot of tequila and a hand taming her hair.

sitting on her knees as opposed to hunched over, she glanced down at jett and held his gaze for but a second before her brown eyes looked back to the lime currently held between his teeth, trying to swallow down whatever nerves she would be combating at the moment. kerry crawled over his body for them to be at eye level with one another, a complete disregard for any possible lewd undertones in the moment previous and putting too much thought into accidentally brushing lips in her midst to obtain the lime slice. she shouldn’t overthink it, couldn’t look like she was having an existential crisis about completing a shot when she could do that later… and with the need to sate the unpleasant taste of tequila with something equal parts sour and flavourful, she leaned down, body buzzing with the incidental touch that would likely haunt her for the rest of the night — only to jut her teeth out to bite into the wedge and slyly pull it out of jett’s mouth and into her own at the last possible second, not missing dae’s groan from a table over as she sucked as much juice out as she could and clambered off of the man beneath her. she would never follow through on that, she was such a fucking pussy. and with the task now completed, she looked over to see that daejae had come out victorious — all because of a second’s hesitation on her part — and the elder of the two shooting her a disappointed look while jae looked vaguely disgusted, to which she nonverbally replied in excessive confusion and despair. damn kyong daehyun.

vi. for once, the house was silent before one in the morning, though that might have something to do with the girls’ house being infiltrated by the boys — save for kerry and jett. still reeling from the night before, where it was possible that she may have ended up with alcohol poisoning if someone — she couldn’t remember who — hadn’t cut her off, she decided to rest and watch a few old episodes of criminal minds currently being played back to back on bravo while lounging in her old, oversized chi o tee and a pair of pyjama shorts. despite being checked on by a couple of the boys throughout the day and them insisting on staying behind to make sure that she was okay, ker assured them that she’d be fine, to go and have fun with their friends. meanwhile, she could only assume that jeremy simply wasn’t feeling it tonight or he had homework to do, thus she remained situated in her bedroom, content while snuggled into her sheets and coming to the scene of the show where the suspect’s face is revealed to the viewer. she had seen the episode before, the pig farm one that never failed to make her cringe at the fact that this was based upon an actual circumstance, so her interest dwindled on occasion, making her hyperaware of the footsteps that bounded for her room and stopped just outside of the door. the knock that followed hadn’t startled her, her head tilted curiously in the sound’s direction as she watched jeremy enter. shooting him a tired smile, still feeling a tad sluggish, she used it as an invitation to join even if he was merely checking in on her, letting her know that he had ordered a pizza if she was hungry. which she was, she felt as though she couldn’t stomach anything in the first few hours of waking up to the worst hangover she’d had thus far, so she had not touched even dry cereal despite the incessant growling indicating that she should really fucking eat.

soon, the two were lying side by side, her on the left — her designated spot due to its proximity to the window — and him on the right, next to the door, situated comfortably under the covers as the climax of the show came into effect while kerry felt rejuvenated with the company she now kept. there wasn’t much to do aside from comment on the frankly disturbing nature of this case of serial murder, which resulted in them turning their attention more to each other than the show itself, ker lying on her side with her eyes solely on jett as he spoke. the only problem with that was, her gaze flickered from his eyes to his face overall, and then zeroing in on his lips. temptation was a bitch, she had come to realize that many times in her twenty years of life, and with this yearning having gone on for long enough, the desire to finally just plant her lips on his was becoming a bit much. she hadn’t realized that she had edged closer, neither had he with his focus on the scene onscreen in the midst of his rambling, to the point where all that she had to do was quickly lean over and — nothing about this would be quick, knowing her, not because she wanted it to be romantic when she wasn’t even sure if he felt the same, but because she had waited long enough to work up the courage to follow through, she wasn’t going to half-ass it now. leaning up on her right elbow, she moved her upper body to hover over jeremy’s, taking his head turning in her direction — likely to question her — as the time to duck in and finally lock lips. it was merely a gentle press, all that the blonde could muster apart from her left hand moving to just rest on his collarbone, more or less making it easier for her if it all went to hell — as if even going for it would have made this simpler for her. he hadn’t moved, as still as a statue for once, and it was enough to clue her in, provoke her to pull back and try to brush off the slip up on her part, only to feel an inkling of a response that had her opening her eyes in surprise. he… was kissing her back ? was it just a semi-automatic reaction or had he wanted to reciprocate it ? already she was wracking her brain for answers and not paying mind to either continuing or moving away from him, though she snapped back to reality within seconds and let her lids flutter shut once again, an almost soothing warmth now flooding her body.

it was a slow response when she opted for another careful peck, hadn’t she thought about this enough to warrant that ? thus, when she was certain that he wouldn’t pull away, kerry parted her lips to caress his bottom one, the pace remaining constant even as a quiet, sharp inhale from her followed and her fingertips pressed just a little more eagerly, more firmly than before, into the sliver of bare skin peeking out from the neck of his t-shirt. it was leisure over urgency, anything close to the latter seemingly much for the girl who felt an ever-blooming connection for the man who sat beside her, his movements equally languid. however, this moment of theirs was cut short by the ringing of the doorbell, the both of them jolting in surprise and moving from one another with ker eyeing him warily to find him already staring back at her. ducking her head, she offered a shy smile before exclaiming, “ i’ll go get the pizza, hold on, ” hopping out of her bed and bounding out of the door, down the stairs and into the foyer. she gulped nervously at what had just happened, how she hadn’t spared him a glance out of sheer nervousness, and now stood beside the small table near the front door that had the twenty dollar bill for their food sitting atop it. but really, had that… actually just happened ? she had to fan herself in the hopes of fending off that inevitable blush — because she had made the first move when she had always convinced herself that she couldn’t — quick to grab the money and open the door, paying the delivery boy with an awkward grin. taking the box herself and closing the door behind her, she gave herself a moment to collect her thoughts, grip her bearings, whatever you wished to call it. because as satisfying as it was to get that over with, she had to accept that there’d be consequences, such as him not feeling the same pull as she had and it being a momentary lapse in judgment. though in the end, she supposed that it was for the better that she had followed through, no matter what the outcome would be; because as she walked up the stairs with their dinner in hand and a faint pink hue adorning her cheeks and the bridge of her nose, kerry remembered that this crush wasn’t fleeting, as even after all of these months it remained, though she hoped to god that she wouldn’t regret acting on it just this once.

#.. i hate this kdjflas #ker: *always in the midst of a crisis over this shit*#me: *is done*#also hc: ker always likes to sit on the left for some reason??#ok but to clarify this is supposed to be in chronological order but knowing me that might not be clear?? oops jdakl #╳┊: — walk around ‘til 3 am. •「 ask meme. 」#╳┊: — tell me what i know again. •「 answered. 」#dachyun #╳┊: — daydreaming deep breathing keep thinking it’s you. •「 jeremy. 」

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