#ihavesomuchthoughtsonthis

[whohasthecards]

Walk it off

That was probably the kindest lesson Hangman's, no Jake's father ever instilled in him. Probably because the intentions weren't malicious at that time.

Jake had be around 3 or 4 and he fell as he was running around the house. He was stunned into silence as he thudded on the ground, and started stifling before his dad propped him up on his hip and gently rubbed his back as he checked for any damage.

Come on buddy, you can walk it off. You ain't able ta run fast right now, but you can still walk, can ya? Yah can still move, and then you'll be able to run real fast later on, yeah?

Jake sniffled and nodded on his dad's shoulder before his dad put him down. One step at a time.

This was the time before everything went to shit.

Despite trying, trying not to become anything like his father that motto stayed (and on bad days he looks in a mirror and sees so much of his parents in him and he's terrified that he has become som-).

When he was a kid and had bruises littered across his skin and words scarred his heart. He gritted his teeth and walked it off, as if the pain never bothered him.

When he felt like he hit a wall during high school or the academy. He walked right through it.

When he was staring at the ceiling lying on his bunk during flight school, wondering if he could make it. He walked as if he was the best.

When he was in enemy territory and had to keep swiping off the blood that continuously ran down his face, and ignore the bruises so deep. He kept on walking, trying to make sure blood didn't trail on the ground behind him.

When he was drinking in the bar after a particularly difficult mission, and saw a group of 20-somethings just like him, but happy and together, friends, family. And he didn't have that-- If he died, only Javy would probably care. He paid his tab and walked away, his throat tightening as he hears the cheers of happiness and conversation behind him, quickly stuffing earphones in his ears.

It worked out well for him. Walking one step at a time through whatever scenario, through leaving what hurt him.

He can do this alone. Walk off everything, no one was there to stop him anyways, no one can really hold him back.

Then the mission happened.

The dagger squad became a permanent squadron.

It was during a day when he and the team where doing maintenance on their planes, an accident had Hangman frowning down at a pretty deep gash on his arm, slicing through his uniform.

Careless, stupid, walk it off, clean it up.

He clucked his tongue and let out an annoyed sigh as he felt the blood drip to his boots, and was about to walk to the bathroom and clean himself up, when--

"Hangman!"

Goddammit.

Hangman let out a groan as he nodded his head to the side as he acknowledged the man who was slowing down to a walk behind him.

"Heyya pops," Hangman drawled, "I'm a bit busy, got to go inside and get some stuff."

"This will only take a second Lieutenant, I just wanted to run some things by the next training session, and I could help you with your plane--"

A second my ass.

"Wait. Is that blood?" Mav said sharply as he grabbed Hangman's shoulder to turn him around to face him.

Hangman stiffened before forcing himself to relax, it's just Mav, it's just Mav.

Mav looked at him with a scrunch between his eyes and a frown on his lips, as he slowly reached out to take Hangman's arm to examine the gash, jaw tightening, as he whipped out a towel from god knows where and started wrapping up Hangman's arm and applying pressure with it.

"What happened? Accident? Of course, stupid question," Mav said applying a bit more pressure making Hangman grit his teeth to stop from hissing in pain. "Why didn't you wrap it up, Seresin?" Mav scolded a he looked at Hangman in the eye.

"I was about to, Mav, that's why I was walkin', was about to clean myself up in the bathroom," Hangman muttered looking skyward to give him patience.

"Bathroom? Nope, nah-uh, you're going to the sick-bay, Lieutenant," Mav said keeping a hand around Hangman's arm, as he steered him by the shoulder.

"It's just a scratch, Mav, I can take care of it myself," Hangman said eyebrows shot up in bewilderment as he tried to pull away from his Captain's grasp on him.

"I know, but that doesn't mean you have to take care of yourself alone. That's what a team is for. Hey, if I can't get out of my check-ups and all that medical jazz, I'm not letting you escape it too. We're both suffering through medical together, kid," Mav said firmly wrapping an arm around his shoulders to pull him against his side as he walked them both to the sick-bay.

Jake sighed, resigning himself to his faith, as he leaned on Mav a bit more, sinking in the older man's warmth. "You don't hafta come with me, ya know?" Jake muttered giving the older man an out.

He followed Mav's instructions to sit down on the examination table and keep pressure on his arm, and slowly blinked as the older man sat beside him pulling him back to his side, and ruffled his hair, making Jake rest his head on his shoulder.

"Nah, of course I have to, buddy," Mav said turning to look down at the boy with soft eyes. "I'm not letting you walk away and alone, Jake."