#ignoring things bc they feel embarrassing or vulnerable is just bad for your health

[gardenstateofmind]

even though i don't particularly identify with them anymore, microlabels were so so important to me as a teenager bc i probably would never have really understood myself without the language to fully think through the complexities of gender and sex

like i've had dysphoria since i can remember and was able to identify it as such when i was 9, but bc i thought the only other option was to be a trans guy, and i was pretty confident i wasn't that, i figured that i Must be a girl and actively identified as a cis girl for the next five years until i learned about nonbinary identities on tumblr

or interpreting my general lack of interest in romantic relationships to mean that even though i was sexually attracted to women, that meant i was still straight. i contemplated bisexuality but i just never identified with that, and the more i thought about it, the more i realized i just wasn't really interested in anyone, so i must just be nothing. and figured my sexuality was "eh not really" until i learned about pansexuality and asexualiy and aromanticism and the idea of an aroace spectrum

so like now as an adult i do sometimes feel like "ugh cringe" when i think about how aggressive i was about queer identity, and these days i would much rather NOT talk about my personal identity, but that does a disservice to the importance those things once held in my life, and they very significant impact they've had in shaping who i am now

[thestrength-of-thewolf-blog]

Akela of the Seeonee Wolf Pack

for i have seen no joy, only danger, / i seen no joy, only strangers, / i seen no joy, seen no joy in this world / should you, choose to go, please be careful of, / lonesome roads, men that travel them, / will not know, will not know of your ways

Archetype — The Ruler Birthday — January 16, 1969 Zodiac Sign — Capricorn MBTI — ESFJ Enneagram — Type 8; the challenger Temperament — Sanguine Hogwarts House — Gryffclaw Moral Alignment — Lawful Neutral Primary Vice — Wrath Primary Virtue — Patience Element — Earth

Overview:

Mother — Tiya Chambal (nee Kaleka) Father — Ojas Chambal Mother’s Occupation — Washwoman Father’s Occupation — Hunter/Meat curer Family Finances — Poor but got by Birth Order — Oldest Brothers — None Sisters — Jiya, little sister. (Her name means sweetheart, I cry.) 2 years younger. Deceased. Other Close Family — His pack. (COMING SOON click here for more!) Best Friend — Rama Bendiya Other Friends — His pack. Look, his social life doesn’t extend very far. Enemies — Anyone who threatens his family. Pets — He’s offended by this question. Home Life During Childhood — Happy, until he was turned. Town or City Name(s) — Seoni, Madhya Pradesh outskirts. Near Pench Tiger Reserve. What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — Very simple. He shared a room with his parents and his little sister. Shared the bed with his sister. They had mats on the floor, a few tapestries decorating, etc. Any Sports or Clubs — Nope. Favorite Toy or Game — He likes to play tug-o-war with the pups if that counts? Haha. Fetch. Though he wouldn’t admit it. Schooling — Uhhh, he was homeschooled. His mate taught him to read. Favorite Subject — He does like literature. Most of what he knows about the world is from what he’s read in books. Popular or Loner — Loner Important Experiences or Events — Being cast out by his village; his whole family getting slaughtered. Nationality — Indian Culture — Wolf. The Law of the Jungle. Religion and beliefs — Spiritual. Believes in the balance of nature. 

Physical Appearance:

Face Claim —  Naveen Andrews Complexion — Beautiful sandy-red skin. Hair Colour — Black Eye Colour — Dark brown Height — 5’9 Build — Muscular, stout. Tattoos — None Piercings — None Common Hairstyle — Wears it long and curly, occasionally ties it back when he’s trying to be #sophisticated Clothing Style — Lmao. He has like 5 shirts, one nice button up and a pair of slacks, and like 2 pairs of cargo jeans, loose and breathable. Doesn’t wear shoes. Mannerisms — He stands like -- weirdly still sometimes when he’s concentrating. Is not a fidgety person at all. Usual Expression —

Health:

Overall (do they get sick easily)? — Very healthy. Can’t remember the last time he got a cold. Physical Ailments — Scars on his face, his eyesight is kind of shitty in his left eye but he’d never admit it. Also scars all over other parts of his face. Neurological Conditions — Uhhh he’s got some PTSD. Otherwise he’s pretty healthy mentally. Allergies —  Stupid people. Grooming Habits — uhm...not really...any...he’ll take a shower every now and then and brush his hair if he’s gotta like impress people. Sleeping Habits — Rather nocturnal. Sleeps late. Sleeps lightly when he does sleep and can wake up at the slightest sound. Eating Habits — Eats a lot of meat to keep him energized. Likes fruits too. He’s like practically vegan but just bc that’s his diet if you were like “wow you’re vegan” he’d be like “what did u call me” Exercise Habits —  Runs around as the wolf all the time, so he’s very strong. Has a lot of endurance. Emotional Stability — He’s honestly so stable and level-headed. He can be grumpy, but he never strikes without thinking about it first, especially not after what happened. Body Temperature — Runs a little hot like most werewolves/shapeshifters. Sociability — He’s honestly pretty introverted. Very close with his pack but can be awkward around humans. Very stoic. Addictions — None. Drug Use — None. Alcohol Use —  None. Akela is a hugs not drugs kinda guy.

Your Character’s Character:

Bad Habits — Making snap judgments about people. Good Habits — Taking care of his family. Strategic. Best Characteristic — His loyalty Worst Characteristic — His intolerance Worst Memory — Well, his whole family getting slaughtered is probably a pretty bad one lmao Best Memory — When his daughter was born, I cry. Proud of — He was proud of his pack. Of the fact he’s never been defeated in an Alpha challenge. Embarrassed by — Nothing, pfft. Driving Style — Omg no he does not drive Strong Points — Intelligent. Calm. Collected. Not easily moved to outward anger. Temperament — Level-headed. Attitude — A little holier-than-thou tbh Weakness — His family Fears — Making a mistake that puts his family in danger. Phobias — None. Secrets — That he was the one who triggered the attack on his family. Regrets — What he did to cause his family to die. Feels Vulnerable When — Doesn’t really. Pet Peeves — Stupid, ignorant people. Anti-Magick rhetoric. Conflicts — None, he’s pretty black and white. Motivation — Keeping his family safe. Short Term Goals and Hopes — Make sure his current pack (Raksha and Rama) are safe. Long Term Goals and Hopes — Build a new pack. Sexuality — Straight but possibly pan, we’re not discounting it. Day or Night Person — Night. Introvert or Extrovert —  Extroverted Introvert Optimist or Pessimist — Ehhh kinda toes the line of both, just depending on the situation

Likes and Styles:

Music — Anything peaceful and instrumental, with strings, flutes, that kind of thing. Books — Rudyard Kipling’s Just So Stories Magazines — Lol no. Foods — Meats. Drinks — Water. Lots of water. Animals — Give you one guess. Sports — He likes to kick a football around with the pups. Social Issues — WEREWOLF RIGHTS Favorite Saying — *recites the Law of the Jungle* Color — Forest colors--greens and browns. Clothing —  Lmao. He has like 5 shirts, one nice button up and a pair of slacks, and like 2 pairs of cargo jeans, loose and breathable. Doesn’t wear shoes. Jewelry — Has a simple silver wedding ring, he wears it on a twine around his neck when he shifts but it’s mostly hidden by his fur. Games — No. Websites — No. TV Shows — No. Movies — No. Greatest Want — To keep his family safe. Greatest Need — To keep his family safe, but also to chill tf out son.

Where and How Does Your Character Live Now:

Home — Apartment across from Raksha and Rama, but he hangs out in the forest more. Household furnishings — Sparse. He kind of hates his apartment. Favorite Possession — His wedding ring. Most Cherished Possession — he doesn’t really have any possessions tbh maybe like a necklace his mate made hi--yeah no it’s definitely his wedding ring which he still wears cry. Town or City Name — Seoni, Madhya Pradesh outskirts, near Pench Tiger Reserve; Uttarakhand, India Details of Town or City — Small. Rural. Village by the water of maybe 500 max. The pack lived on the outskirts of even that in about 5ish lil houses/lean tos. The village knew they were werewolves and...tolerated them...until they didn’t.  Married Before — Kavya, his mate. Mahkia’s mother. Significant Other Before — Kavya, his mate. Mahkia’s mother. Children — Mahkia, his daughter, who died when she was 21. He was grooming her to be Alpha after him. She was beautiful and kind but #fierce. Relationship with Family — He was very close with everyone in the pack. They all respected and admired him, and he liked to tease them. He was like a brother/uncle/grandfather to all of them. Car — lol no Career — Alpha Dream Career — To be Alpha (#winning.) Dream Life — To have a back that is just as strong as the one he had before. Love Life — Had a mate, Kavya. She was killed a few years before the massacre by a hunter. Talents or Skills — Intelligent. Strategic. An excellent hunter. Very intuitive. Intelligence Level — Very intelligent in a natural ~~ way. He’s not book savvy at all. Finances — Uhhh he has some money? Where did he get it from? We don’t know.

Your Character’s Life Before Your Story:

Past Careers — Uhh he’s always been Alpha ahaha Past Lovers — His mate and wife, Kavya (deceased) Biggest Mistakes — Reacting too quickly and getting his family killed. Biggest Achievements — Creating a pack, which not many turned-wolves have been able to do.