#ignore danielle jeff just looks so cute in that picture

[chrvstenpress]

stef x jeff

[121distractions]

22- BANLIEUE (housing estates)

My years in college are of no use to me. I do not like what I am learning, I do not like the people I am learning with and I do not understand what I am doing there. All I want is to fuck, dance and get well dressed. I let others decide for me and I ended up with an economy bachelor’s degree and now I am trying to learn law. The law (except the history of law) and the economy, are boring me to death. I like to draw women’s shoes, pants or hats; but even for that, I do not take myself seriously, it is a hobby, it is not a job. One must do law when one do not know what to do because it leads to everything. Lawyers, clerks of notaries, bailiffs, they are characters from Balzac novels, it is not my future. The students, there, behave like fascists and are homophobic. They are surprised that I do not want to do “military preparations”. They spend every weekend at the barracks and when they will do their military service, they will already be officers. No, I will not be a just a stupid soldier, because my military service, I will not do it. The faith in which I grew up forbid to do military service, non-violence was basic. Objectors of conscience must spend twice as much time in prison as they would have spent in military service. When a “brother” went off to do his two years in prison, there was a farewell party, gifts and a lot of prayers. We were all very proud. Some made the effort to visit them in Fleury-Mérogis and had to share their experience on the stage with the microphone at the desk. Even if the speech was spontaneous and would not be judged, it was necessary to pay attention to the gesture, the contact with the auditory and the construction of the message. The prisoners’ letters were read in front of the whole congregation. New prayers would follow. I have never been to Fleury, I was too young. Faith has become superfluous to me, but disgust for the primitive male universe has remained. The uniforms are beautiful and the adventures of Jeff Stryker in prison are very exciting but nothing works, I would do anything to be discharged, P4, psychologically disturbed!

The lesson is really too annoying, Nathalie offers to go to her home to listen to records. Nathalie was Catherine’s best friend at the Émile Dubois High School. They wanted her to repeat her 11th grade so her parents put her in an expensive private school. Catherine partied too many with me and did not get her baccalaureate; I had it in extremis and so did Nathalie. We are now together studying law. Nathalie’s world is very different from Catherine’s. She also lives in a recent building of the 13th arrondissement, but not in a project. It is a residence with intercom. Nathalie uses only her particle for her name but on the bell, there is her full name “Brugerolle de Fraissinette” It does not leave much room for first names. I finally understand why sometimes she initials with a BdF. I never dared to ask. So chic! The apartment is huge but with low ceilings. It is dark, the Venetian blinds are just slightly open, Chinese furniture in black enamel occupy all the space. Nathalie’s mother is Eurasian of Vietnamese origin. She is very typical. Very skinny with a lot of very black hair, she is doing her nails with a small YSL bottle. She really looks like Eartha Kitt! She does not get up to say hello, she does not want to ruin her nail polish. Nathalie teaches me the word “quadroon”, Nathalie Brugerolle de Fraissinette is very proud to be quadroon. For me it sounds more like a descendant of Crusaders knights, but it just means she is a quarter Asian. Nobody could imagine it. Nathalie is a little round and very white, there may be in her eyes a little sign of bridle but you really have to know. The father is an engineer on an oil platform in Abu Dhabi and is never there. We head giggling down the hall. Eartha Kitt understands right away that it is not today that her daughter will finally have a boyfriend. Nathalie’s room is tiny, but she has, for herself, a compact Philips Hi-Fi with record player, FM radio and “auto-reverse” cassette player. She loves “Mad World” from Tears for Fears. I had the feeling that last week when I told her that I did not have the money to buy it, that she had never heard of it, I am intrigued. Will she offer it to me? No, she offers me to share her “Ham-mashed potatoes.” There are so few, I leave her the only calories that she is allowing herself. It is time to go to the Luco. I say it is a good idea but what is the Luco exactly? I keep that silly question for myself. “Au revoir Madame”. Eartha Kitt has a nail that worries her a lot and launches a “Goodbye, Philippe” without lifting her head. We prepare our orange cards, the metro pass for the zones 1 and 2. We have “the ticket chic and shock” as the advertisement says and we leave for the garden of the Luxembourg; the “Luco” in student lingo.

The cheapest orange card is always zone 1 and 2. Zone 1 is Paris “Intra Muros”, zone 2 is the very near suburbs. I know that the real Zone is Malakoff and everybody in the suburbs are zonards. Less than 50 years ago, the former site of the fortifications of Paris was a gigantic wasteland covered with shantytowns. The border of Malakoff had nothing to envy to the Brazilian favelas. I read Celine’s “Journey at the End of the Night” (but in the edition of the Pleiades) and the hell he describes is my suburb, it is Malakoff, gloomy and sordid. Malakoff is in Zone 2, what a luck, nothing differentiates me from real Parisians. Zone 3 is too much of shame! Zone 4, it may be well if you live in Versailles or Le Vésinet but zone 5 is again the horror. Anyway, I also know that leaving Malakoff means having to provide for myself, and I am not ready for it yet. I must still endure the stepfather.

In zone 3, there had been the year before Gilles. Gilles was only 16 years old, and I was not adult yet, we met in The Broad. He lived with his parents in Noisy-le-Sec. We waited until nine in the morning to have no one at my house in Malakoff. I was super tired but Gilles was very cute and a slut in bed. It was worth staying awake, three hours of fucking before having to go off again. I just had a single bed and it is in pretty jolly mood that I was driving Gilles in the big parental bed, the ultimate blasphemy. A bed made of rosewood with floral inlays, a legacy of Granny, the stepfather’s grandmother. After adding positions to the Kama-sutra, the sheets were not always very clean. We were leaving to the bathroom looking for a sponge, hot water and a hair dryer and it looked like nothing happened. It made us laugh so much. Gilles adored me, I think I was his first love. After a few weeks of our insomniac loves, I had to meet his best friends in Noisy. It was far but how to resist the curiosity to discover his home. Arriving in his housing estate, I had already the feeling that despite our identical proletarian social origins, our environments were very different. The north of Paris was much more “violent” than the south. My religious education had been very strict but had been an education. I had learned to read, alone, in conversation or in speech before an assembly, I had a vocabulary. Having read the Bible three times from top to bottom had eventually changed my view of the world. The representation of the blinds of Jericho by Nicolas Poussin in the Louvre, that was fascinating for me. Gilles’ 5 friends listened to rap that I never heard, … in French. They had looked at me, dismayed, I was just clean on me and a little classy. They wanted to shout, “Shit, what are you doing with a bougie?” but had only asked how we had met. It had not been a question, it had been an accusation. Gilles had tried to come out with me, but it was not going as planned. I had seen their universe collapse before their eyes, their childhood friend had just become a fag. Only the curvy girlfriend seemed a little interested in my presence and ready to adopt me. I had invented an excuse to slip away, … forever. It was really too complicated. If I had decided to disappear from Gilles’ life, he had not said his last word. I had found him back recently, more beautiful than ever, successively at the door of The Broad and then of Les Bouchons. He had seen me, talked in a low voice with the other bouncer and left a little while before allowing me to go inside. Was I dreaming? Another time, while Yves the door guy was alone, he told me he liked me but that I had not been nice with Gilles at all. He had been kicked out of his house after coming out, tried to reach me but I ignored him and he had very difficult moments. Now everything was better, but he was mad at me for it. I did not know yet that it would go even further. Two years later, he would have the main role in Jean-Daniel Cadinot’s new X movie “Under the sign of the Stallion” with, as a commercial, a beautiful picture of him in bleached blonde. I would watch the movie, but I would not recognize his cock, it was as if he had a stunt for the sex scenes. I knew his cock well enough! Later, he would die of AIDS, like everyone else. I DID NOT KILL GILLES! The suburbs killed Gilles.

Malakoff is still communist but more and more annexed by the capital. The Theater 71 is supposed to attract all the Parisian intelligentsia, the National Institute for Statistics has the largest building since 74 and the law section of the famous medical school Paris V is overflowing since 1976. Yes, I find myself in college 10 minutes walk from my home. Each train of the Métro delivers its hundreds of beautiful speakers apprentices but I arrive from the other side. I did not cross the ring. I hate not being Parisian. Jimmy Sommerville sings: “Run away, turn away, run away …” But how to survive? I think I am a suburbanite but I am wrong, I am already the worst Parisian. I suffocate as soon as I see these lamentable little pavilions and want to throw up in front of the projects. That is why, Gilles was not possible. My world is civilized, I do not get thrown out, it is me who decides when I go!

The stepfather, he works for TF1, the national television, in Paris rue Cognacq-Jay. He is a kind of a storekeeper. One day he brings back an ad from the collective notice board. A film director exchanges an independent room, not under the attic, in the 15th arrondissement for some hours of babysitting. Mom does not cry, Mom never cries, but she is sad. She did not see much of me anymore, but I was still living there. The former communist woman was so proud to have a son who was studying. Jimmy continues to sing: “You leave in the morning with everything you own in a little black case, Alone on a platform, the wind and the rain on a sad and lonely face”. I am not on the platform of a train station, but on the Métro platform and I am leaving only 3 kilometers away. I will come back for the Friday night dinners, those with the snails and the beautiful porcelain.

[luvtessascott]

SOI Hamilton Part 2/2 Write-Up (Retakes & M&G)

Part 1

The retakes started with Scott and quickly after Tessa coming out for their little speech to past the time while some of the skaters got ready to do a retake. Scott works the crowd with great confidence even better when Tessa got out there. The fake proposal was so cute I was laughing SO hard as was the whole audience. Lots of screaming and laughter. When Scott asked the crowd for something else for them to do, of course half of the crowd started chanting KISS KISS KISS, lol that’s when my second hand embarrassment kicked in hahaa...anyways he talked to an adorbs little girl after and then someone suggested to talk Marie and Patch. Anyways, the video of this whole thing is on my youtube. I also want to add, that I love that Tessa was the one to pull off the joke LIKE YAS give me more T. I also thought their low light, highlight was really funny. The retakes for the Boy’s number was really fun of course Scott when HAM again and chanted on the other boy through the whole number. I’m glad they decided to do the whole number again when really they only had to do part of it.

OKAY MEET AND GREET! So we took our time getting down there, had a quick chat with our friends, had a washroom break, and then took to the line. We were about third last in line but the line moved at a good pace. At no point did I feel like it was taking too long. We talked to some fans in line, I’m always happily surprised to see just how many fans come from the states for our shows. @makeitcountmeggy and I briefly discussed things we really wanted to say to each of the skaters and the general order we wanted to do things for when we got to TS.

The first table had Jeff and Kaetlyn. We walked up and said Hi, we congratulated Kaetlyn on her World title and on the olympics and jeff on a great show. I told Kaetlyn that when she was skating at worlds I used all my data to watch her skate and it was totally worth it. We all laughed and Jeff echoed that it was worth it and Kaetlyn said thank you. She’s very striking in person, maybe it was how her make-up was done but her dark features are so bold. That was my first time meeting both of them. They were really nice.

Next, we moved to Eric and Meghan. Began with the Olympic congrats. We had pre-planned to talk about TSL with Meghan. @makeitcountmeggy started off  by saying that we had discussed it and wanted to tell her that she was the best thing to ever happen to TSL. She laughed and thanked us said that she wanted to put a positive spin and bring some new discussion to the table. I told her that it was refreshing and we really valued her insight. She said thank you so much. I had met them once before in 2015. They’re a little quite but if you bring up topics they’re easy to talk to.

Kaitlyn and Andrew!! Another pre-planned topic was to talk about Nationals in 2018, both of us had attended it. I said that their Je Suis Malade performance at nationals was one of our favourite moments. They both said ‘Awh thank you’. @makeitcountmeggy told them that we were there in person and when the whole audience was willing them on before it started it felt so special. Kaitlyn sighed happily and said she couldn’t believe that happened. After having a rough SD, they were really nervous going into the free and just knowing they had the whole crowd behind them...Andrew cut in and said that it was then a moment of well we need to pull it together and really deliver now. Kaitlyn agreed yeah now that everyone was behind them they had to do it. I said but wasn’t it a relief to do it?! And they both exclaimed yes of course such a big relief. I’ve met Kaitlyn and Andrew twice before in 2015. They’ve gotten much better at talking with fans. They were pretty awkward in 2015, hahaa.

Then we got to Gabi and Javi. We didn’t have much to say to them, just congrats on the olympics Gabi said that she loved our outfits and we looked super cute. We asked them how they were holding up since we were the end of the end. They laughed said they were tired. 

There was a bit of a line for TS obviously fans were talking time with them. So they re-arranged the line and we waited. The girl and boy behind us were super hyped and emotional and shaky so we allowed them to go ahead of us and opted to go last. I’ve mentioned this before but my favourite thing to do for memories is to pop my phone on voice record before a meet and greet and then just lay it on the table so I have the memory later. I have it for this one, I don’t feel comfortable posting because of the now much larger size of the fandom. Message me off anon if you’re really curious and I’ll consider. I’m only going to write my side of the meet and greet to allow @makeitcountmeggy to tell her side if she wishes. Meg went up first and went to Tessa’s side of the table and began talking. I went to Scott’s side and said “HI”. He said, “Hi, nice to see you again!” Tessa repeated as well ‘Good to see you again!’ and I said “yes, great to see you!”. Then Scott opened his arm and said ‘come here.’ And I walked in and gave him a hug. (lol, guys I was so close to the flow.) I stepped back and handed him his present and said “This is for you”. It was in neon green wrapping paper that was a tad see through but I put his card on the front so it blocked for the most part what the gift was. He said “Oh you didn’t have to do that.” He took it into his hands and rubbed his fingers over the wrapping paper and said “Is this what I think it is?” I didn’t respond I was processing just being hugged by Scott guys and he repeated, “Is it?” He had this excited tentative smile on his face almost vibrating and then I said, “What do you think it is?” He said “I don’t want to say it.” And I pushed further, “Say it.” He continues to slip his hands under the paper and he says, “No I don’t want to say it.” So I said, “It’s a record...” He says “YA?” And i repeat “It is a record.” And he said “which one is it?” and I said, “Uhm Apple... I forget what it’s called.” He makes his first tear of the wrapping paper and I said “Yeah open it, go for it.” He makes quick work of the paper revealing the record for ‘Road Apples’ by The Tragically Hip. He gasped and jumped out of his chair and pulled me into him for a hug. I was laughing because it was legit adorable such childlike excitement. He said “You’re the best! I’ve never..I’ve never opened a present before opening a card, that is SOOOO amazing, THAAANK YOU.” I said, “You’re welcome, I’m so glad you like it.” He then said to some of the crew that was hanging around, “it’s awesome eh?” and security said “Road Apple?” and he said, “Yeah, road apple.” He said, “That is the most thoughtful thing, thank you so much.” He hugged me again. Then he sat down and said, “You know Rick (referring to the annoying security guard), was the secuirty guard on tour for the Hip well a lot of times but on that last tour?” And I said ‘oh?” Scott said, “Yeah he’s a big star, he’s a bigger star than us. He’s in that Long Time Running documentary...” Then I turned to Tessa (who had been talking with Meg, I didn’t just ignore her LOL). I said, “Tessa this is for you it’s an early birthday present.”  Handed her a large hot pink sparkly flower gift bag, that had a small box that was wrapped in paper in side. Tessa said, “Oh thank you so much! I Can’t wait to open it.” She peaked inside and said, “Ou I see some chocolate down there.” And I said, “Yeah, always chocolate.” She said, “Thank you so much,” with a smirk and continued, “I’m going to save it so I can open it at home.”

Incase you’re curious, I got Tessa the record for Moulin Rouge but it came in this box so I wrapped the entire box so it fit nicer in the gift bag.

We then slide our prints from Danielle on the table for signing. And they both leaned in to look at the pictures. The pictures were ontop of envelopes where Danielle had written us cute messages and Tessa slide it down and was glancing at them. I said, “Of course Danielle took these.” Then Tessa said, “She’s the best.” Meg said, “She’s awesome.” Tessa said, “That’s so cool, they’re both cool.” They start to sign them and Tessa stared at it for a moment and said “she’s so amazing.” Then we took our picture and said ‘thank you!’ Scott again said, “That is the best [reference to the record], you’ve just inspired a new collection for me.” We said “Bye, thank you!” And headed out.

(Anything from Ts was word for word based off my audio clip)

We basically skipped back to meet Danielle absolutely thrilled. Such a great meet and greet experience we had a ton of fun.