#if you've actually read any of this please don't take it too seriously

[rosietherivendell]

............

[goquokka00]

Hellooooo! Can I request bangchan x innocent!reader? Kind of like corruption kink, also, reader is a virgin. And can you pls pls pls add some overstimulation plss? Sending love 🩷🩷

Oh, definitely!!! Took me a bit to get actual good ideas and decide the flow and all that, but I think this one turned out really well. Hope it's what you were picturing 💗💗💗

Corruption

Summary: Chan was always aware of how innocent his step sister was. He was also aware of how good of a student she was, too. It always managed to feed into his imagination, and it didn't help that you were his ideal type. So imagine his surprise when he found the perfect blackmail to get his precious little sister to do whatever he wanted.

Pairing: Step Bro! Bangchan X Step Sis! Reader (F!)

Genre: Smut (MDNI!)

Warnings: Stepcest, Chan is manipulative, Reader is gullible, a little bit of bullying kinda? but they're step siblings so they're gonna pick on each other anyway, mentions of masturbation, nipple play, oral sex (f! receiving), fingering, dirty talk, p in v sex, unprotected penetrative sex (please wrap it before you tap it everyone), squirting, overstimulation, 100% 18+ (seriously like if you're a minor don't read pls and thank you <3)

Word Count: 5.3K

The first time Chan had ever met you was when his mom decided to have you and your dad over for dinner. At that point in time, your parents had been together for about a year and had finally deemed that it was time for you both to meet.

Now, Chan had been fully aware that his mom's boyfriend had a daughter. He knew that you were extremely kind and sweet, as his mom put it, and that you were a very good student. He had also found out that you were younger than him by about 6 years.

He was NOT warned about how beautiful you were. The second you had walked into his home, your crop top and very short shorts hugging your body in all of the right places, a sweatshirt tied around your waist as you took off your sandals and straightened your bangs out and tightened your ponytail...he already knew he was fucked.

You were the definition of his ideal type. A perky chest, curves, thick thighs...someone who was extremely kind and considerate, and wanted nothing more than to just help out where they could...god, you were perfect.

That night, during dinner, you paid attention to every detail him or his mom had said. What his interests were, what his mom liked in children, rules that they had in the household, and so much more. You took all of that information in and remembered it. Every question you were asked was answered with such...perfect answers.

How were your grades? All A's, with a few B's, but nothing too extreme.

What were you majoring in? No clue, you were just focusing on generals at a local community college until you figured out the career path you wanted to take.

What were some of your favorite hobbies? Writing, reading, drawing, sometimes even going on walks or going to the library to study on fascinating topics.

What chores did you usually do? Anything that had to be done, but you weren't a fan of doing the dishes because of the small bits of food that would touch your hand and scare the crap out of you.

You were like an angel from heaven. Even after dinner, when Chan and his mom were cleaning up, you offered to help dry dishes and tidy up a bit. It was unbelievable.

You were unbelievable.

Eventually, over the years, Chan got to know you better. And he got to understand that you were, in fact, innocent. You didn't know anything about sex, you didn't cuss, you went to church with your dad every Sunday at 9am, you've never done drugs or drank alcohol, and you had beliefs that prevented you from doing any wrong.

Upon finding this out, Chan realized something that stirred within him. He wanted to taint you. He wanted to corrupt you, make you the farthest thing from innocent. He fantasized about it, thinking up ideas on how he'd be able to get you to succumb to him. But he never acted on it.

But that feeling lingered. And it only got worse when your dad and his mom got married, which resulted in him and his mom moving in with you and your dad. Your house was bigger, anyway. It could easily fit the two of them.

But God, those feelings of wanting to corrupt you got so much worse. He was around you so much more often, seeing you do tasks so...seductively. And you weren't even trying to.

One time, the remote to the TV fell underneath the couch while you and him were watching an anime series. You had instantly got to the ground, got on all fours, and reached underneath the couch to grab the remote. And in the process, Chan got a whole view of your ass. Your perfect ass in those gym shorts, your pussy outlined just enough to give him ideas.

There was another time you had been doing laundry, and was just switching the loads around. Chan just happened to walk by when he saw you bent over in an oversized t-shirt, the only thing covering your cunt being your panties as you swapped loads.

What Chan wouldn't do to give you his.

It got to the point where Chan couldn't help but steal your panties when it was his turn to do the laundry and jerk off with it. It felt like the only way he'd ever get to even have you. Breathing in what your pussy could smell like, maybe even putting your panties in his mouth to try and get a taste...

It was getting bad. Chan knew he'd have to do something at this point. He had to get you, he had to have you. But how? You were perfect, you did no wrong. And you would NEVER just...do it because he wanted it.

Well, luckily for Chan, an opportunity presented itself.

See, you were in college. Both of you were, which was why both of you still lived at home. Better than the dorms, much better.

Because you were in college, you had to take a very important test for your major, known as the Literary Composition Exam, or the LCE. You had spent weeks studying for this test. You'd spend hours locked up in your room, going over every little bit of material that was available to you, doing whatever it took to make absolute certain that you passed.

Except...you didn't.

For whatever reason, when you went to take the exam, the material wasn't the same as the stuff you had studied. And so, while some of it was the same, you did your best to answer everything correctly.

But when you received the test today, you had seen that you had failed it. Miserably. Your heart sank, even as you took it out of your backpack once you got home. How were you supposed to tell your parents? You...you couldn't. You refused to share that with them.

You gently placed the test face down on your desk, putting a few papers over it before going to the bathroom. Maybe...maybe a warm shower would help melt that stress away.

But as you were taking a shower, Chan had gone into your room. It was his turn to do the laundry this week and was going and collecting all of the dirty clothing from each room. Your room was the last Chan had to go to, and then he could get all of the loads started.

But as he went to your closet, he noticed a paper underneath some others. It looked like all marked up, and he couldn't help but be curious. Weren't you supposed to get your results back for your LCE today?

Chan took that moment, reaching for the paper and sliding it out from under the others. Instantly, his eyes widened. This...this was your test. This was the test that you had spent weeks studying for, and you...you failed it. Chan couldn't believe his eyes as he grazed over all of the pen marks.

You, the perfect, most innocent daughter in your parents' eyes, had failed one of the most important tests that you'd ever have to take in your college career.

It was remarkable. Chan couldn't take his eyes off of it, looking at each question you had gotten wrong. There were so many...you usually aced every test that you ever took...EVER. Seeing how much you had gotten wrong was just insane.

And that...was when you walked back into your room.

You had changed into a sweatshirt and some gym shorts, your hair dried and in a ponytail. You had your dirty clothes in your hands, and had just wanted to lay down. But instead, you were met with the sight of Chan in your room, your failed LCE in his hands. Immediately, your heart dropped.

"Chan, what are you doing in my room?!" You were frantic, throwing your clothes to the side as you tried to reach for your test. But just before you could reach it, Chan held it out of your reach, raising a brow.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, I just wanted to look your test over. It's pretty interesting." Chan spoke. He went back to it, flipping through the endless pages. "It's not every day I get to see that you managed to fail anything, let alone one of the most important tests in your entire college career."

"Chan!"

"What, I'm just saying." Chan shrugged, continuing to keep your test away from you. You weren't amused, going to him and reaching for it, practically climbing onto his body to try and get the test from him.

"This isn't funny, give that test back!"

"No way, this is legendary."

"Chan, seriously!"

"I'm being serious! I already said I want to look at it, why are you so desperate to get...it...back...oh my god." Suddenly, Chan realized something. It was why you were so desperate to get that test back. "You haven't told mom and dad yet."

"No, and I really don't want to." God, just the idea of your parents finding out that you had completely bombed the single most important test in your entire college career made you sick to your stomach. But Chan? Oh, this gave him leverage. Something to hang over your head, to potentially use against you.

It couldn't be more perfect.

"You're not going to tell them? Really?" Chan raised a brow, looking back to the test. It was only for a moment, before he looked back at you, a smirk on his face. "Then I guess I'll have to break the news to them-"

"NO!" It was one thing for you to have to tell your parents, but if Chan told them first...? Oh, it'd be hell on earth.

"Well, they can't not know, Y/n."

"Yes, they can! There's a retake next month, and I'll be extra sure to pass this time, just...they can't know!"

"I don't know...keeping things from our parents is so...wrong, don't you think?" Chan then turned, starting to go towards the door. "I'm going to go and show them this. Keeping secrets is bad."

"Chan, please no!" Like that, you were wrapping your arms around his torso, holding him there in an attempt to keep him from leaving your room. He couldn't leave, or he'd tell. "Please...I-I'll do anything."

Oh, you shouldn't have said that. You really shouldn't have said that.

Chan slowly turned, not believing his ears. For a moment, his dick twitched, slowly starting to betray him as he looked at you, your eyes shining and begging him to stay and not go. To not tell your parents. Was this finally it? Was he getting the chance he had craved for so long?

"...anything?"

"Anything." You confirmed it, right then and there. You were really willing to do anything in order to keep Chan from blabbing to your parents. This was it. This was finally what Chan had craved for forever.

And he couldn't wait.

"Well then, I guess we can figure something out, can't we?" Chan said, handing you your test. You quickly took it back, moving to hide it once more. And you were going to hide it even better than you had. "I'll keep my mouth shut up until you've retaken the test and pass. But you have to do something for me, too."

"Okay, and that is...?" You asked, turning around. You weren't sure what Chan had up his sleeve, but you had said you'd do anything to keep the horrible grades a secret. You always kept your promises too, which Chan was very aware of. And so, he'd have to be careful about how he went about this.

"See, I was asked by a friend to do some research on how to best please a girl." God, he sounded so stupid. He sounded completely and utterly stupid. "And while porn exists and yada yada yada, I want to make sure that all of the techniques actually work. And since you said you'd do anything to keep this whole test thing a secret, I was thinking you could help me out. A favor for a favor."

Please work, please work, please work, please work, please work, please-

"Um, well I guess when you put it that way...I wouldn't mind, I suppose..." You bought it. Holy fucking shit, you bought it. Chan couldn't even believe his ears. "But I've never really...done anything like it before, so I don't have a preference."

"Oh, well...that's okay. I was thinking that maybe we could give some stuff a shot. Y'know, field test a bit." Keep squeezing the orange, Chan. He was so close; he was practically salivating at this point. "Obviously if you get uncomfortable, we can stop, but I just really want to help out my friend, you know? And you would really help me out in return."

Well, if that was the case, then you could understand why Chan wanted your help so bad. You were like a fly caught in his web at this point. He was simply asking for your help, and you trusted him.

"I mean, if it'll help out, then I guess I don't see the problem in it." Bingo. Chan couldn't believe that had actually worked. He thought you would've called him gross, that step siblings shouldn't do that kind of stuff. Part of him wanted to question you, figure out if you were serious or not. But it was only a small one.

He worked hard for this. He wasn't just about to give it up.

"Alright, then do you think you could clear up some time tonight? That way we can have plenty of time." Reality? Your parents were both leaving to be out of town around 5pm. They wouldn't be back until a few days later.

"Oh, yeah. That makes sense." God, just how gullible were you? Gullible enough to make Chan's cock throb, it seemed.

All he had to do was wait.

||

It took about 3 whole hours for your parents to actually leave. And while they only left thirty minutes behind schedule, it felt like hell on earth for Chan. He wanted nothing more than to get into your panties, play with you for hours and make you writhe and squirm and cry.

Chan wanted to make absolutely certain that they wouldn't be in the house, though. If your parents found out about this, he'd be in a whole world of trouble. Both of you would be.

And so, he waited a whole extra hour, watching the Life360 that your parents had forced you both onto, making sure they were far enough away to where he knew they weren't going to turn around. And once he was sure, he walked to your room and knocked on the door, stepping inside.

"Hey, you got some free time?" Chan walked inside, seeing you laying on your bed. You were only in an oversized shirt, thigh high socks, and panties, scrolling through your phone. God, just the outline of your cunt got Chan riled all over again.

"Yeah, what's up?" You asked, turning. You were so adorable, it hurt. Chan stepped inside more, gently shutting the door before walking over to you, before sitting on your bed.

"I was wondering if we could start trying stuff out. Figure out what pleases you best." Chan said, watching your face light up as you remembered what he was talking about.

"Oh, okay. Sure." You said, moving to sit up. Chan smiled, moving a bit so you'd have some room. "What exactly are we starting with?"

"Well, I wanted to start with playing around with your breasts a bit. I've heard that feels nice." Chan said, his hands fidgeting with themselves. They wanted to be on your body so badly. Finally touch something that was so pure.

"Okay." The second you gave him permission, Chan's hands were on you. He started by cupping the flesh through the shirt, gently massaging them as he watched you closely. Your breathing had hitched, your eyes watching what he was doing. But it was when he looked back down that his blood ran down to his cock.

"You...you aren't wearing a bra...?" Chan couldn't believe his eyes. Your nipples were perked, practically poking themselves through the shirt you had on.

"Well, yeah. Bras aren't that comfortable, so..." You just shrugged, before gasping as Chan brushed over them. He moved his thumbs back and forth against them, moving to pinch them gently. That got a whine out of you, and it was such a beautiful sound.

"Jesus...that feels nice?" Chan asked, watching you nod. That was good, and to him, an indication to go further. He carefully moved your shirt up, taking it off to see your bare chest in all of it's glory.

It was gorgeous. Nipples perky and stiff, your flesh round and supple. It was everything Chan could've wanted plus more. And when he touched your skin, it was so soft... it was soft and delicate and so perfect.

Every time his fingers flicked, pinched or messed with your nipples, you'd whine and squirm a bit, the sight always going straight to his dick. He was so hard, he wanted nothing more than to just flip you over and fuck you right then and there. But he wanted to take his time, too.

And that's what he did.

He moved his head down, eventually taking one of your breasts into his mouth, using his tongue to flick against your nipple and sucking on your skin. The feeling of it caused you to moan, arching your back into him more.

"Ch-Chan..." Oh, you moaning his name made him want to scream. He was so hard, you were so perfect, everything about this situation was perfect.

He eventually pulled off, looking up at you as he continued to mess around with your chest, giving you a cheeky smile. He knew what he was doing felt good.

"Good?"

"M-Mhm..."

"Mhm?" Chan couldn't help but laugh a bit, finding your reaction adorable. But he wanted to take things further. Just a little bit. "Can we go further? Want me to make you feel even better?"

"Ye...Yeah...Yes..."

"Alright...go ahead and lay down then."

As you laid down, Chan was finally able to see your panties for the first time. They were pink with white paw prints, a tiny little white bow on the front. They were so cute on you, practically signaling how innocent you truly were. And when Chan got himself between your legs, spreading your legs apart, he noticed the wet patch laying right over your cunt.

"Look at that...already so wet, and it's all for me..." Chan licked his lips, taking a hand off of your leg to your clothed pussy. Slowly, agonizingly so, he placed his pointer right where your clit should be, bringing it down to your hole. It was feather light, and it caused you to whine and squirm. "That feel nice? I bet it does, you're getting wetter by the second."

He wasn't wrong, unfortunately. That wet spot got bigger the more he spoke, the more he barely touched you. It was agonizing, yeah, but god, it was amazing, too.

Chan admired it for a moment. One of the many panties he'd steal were right here on your body, forming one of the largest wet patches he'd ever seen in his life. It was wrong. But god, did he not care. He didn't care in the slightest.

He eventually leaned his head down, pressing a kiss right onto your mound, breathing in your smell. Musky, but so so sweet. And once that was committed to memory, he figured it was time to get rid of the panties and see the real thing.

"Let's get these off of you, huh?" Chan's hands moved as he spoke, hooking around your panties and bringing them down your body, his eyes not leaving yours once until the panties were completely off. And the second he saw you, his everything stopped. His brain, his heart...the only thing that was working was his dick, and that thing was throbbing.

You were beautiful. It was the cutest little pussy Chan had ever seen in his life, glistening wet. And when he spread your folds open, he was met with a pink that rivaled the panties you had on. Not to mention how your hole was clenching, and your clit was peeking out from under it's hood.

"God...you're so fucking beautiful." Chan couldn't even take his eyes off of you. He took his finger again, gently touching the pink muscle, touching your clit and pulling it back to get a better look. It made you squirm, your hole clenching. "You have such a pretty pussy...and to think it's on my step sister..."

All you did was whine, not really knowing what to say. The touch felt nice, but his words were nicer. You'd never heard him talk like that before. And the pit that grew in your stomach when you heard it was beyond amazing.

Chan took a moment to continue just touching you, watching how you'd react to certain touches, where you liked to be touched. But he knew he could do more. He could do so much more.

And so, keeping his eyes on you, he lowered his head and gently flicked your clit once, watching as your breath hitched, your hips flinch a bit.

"That feel good?" Chan asked. He already knew the answer, and it was only further confirmed by you nodding.

With that nod, he went back down, using his tongue to give one long lick up your folds, before flicking your clit and coaxing it out of it's hood, gently suckling on the small bundle of nerves. That got a nice, loud moan out of you.

"Oh my...god, Chan...!" Oh, the way you said his name in such a vulnerable way...it was absolutely delicious. It made Chan groan, his hips bucking into the bed.

His pattern was immaculate. He'd suck on your clit, using his tongue to tease it in the meantime while his hands went to spread your cunt apart. He wanted to make sure that you were nice and vulnerable so he could really get in there. And oh, the moans you rewarded him with. They were absolutely perfect.

Your taste was even better. Salty, sweet, just a tiny bit of tang but not too much...It made him realize more and more just how much he craved you, how much he just wanted to ruin you into nothing.

Eventually, he went further, diving his tongue into your hole to really scrape out your juices, his nose consistently bumping into your clit. And it made you cry out, your legs wanting to close, feeling yourself get closer and closer to the edge. But Chan didn't let you. He gave your cunt one last lick before moving his hands to keep you spread once more, before looking up at you, licking his lips.

"Keep yourself spread, okay? I want you nice and wide so I can taste all of you." Chan spoke. You couldn't help but nod, feeling the need to comment.

"I...It feels really good, by the way. Whatever you're doing it...it feels really, really good."

"Does it?"

"Yeah..."

"Yeah?" Oh, the smile on Chan's face when you said that. You probably gave him that input so he knew this was good for his friend to know. But he wasn't here for that. No no no. He was here simply to get you to cum over, and over, until you couldn't take anymore.

He eventually dove back in, plunging his tongue into you while his arms and hands kept you nice and spread, not wanting you to squirm around too much. And he kept going, even as you began to buck your hips, trying to squirm and get away.

"Chan, I...I feel weird..." You could feel the coil in your gut, a form of tightness as you neared closer and closer. Chan could feel it too, as your legs were really starting to shake.

"It's okay, you're just gonna hit an orgasm soon." Chan's voice was muffled, due to his face being buried in your delicate cunt, which was dripping more and more of it's juices into his mouth. "Get there though, go ahead and just release it, okay? Can you do that for me?"

You could, and you did. You moaned out, your hips bucking as Chan practically latched himself onto you. He continued to work you through your orgasm, watching as you panted and shook, the orgasm washing right through you.

"There you go, good girl..." Once you had calmed down, Chan debated on moving on. He could let you experience his cock, which had been painfully throbbing to get into the pussy it's been wanting for so long. Or he could simply keep going with this.

That's what he did.

The second you stopped squirming, he latched right back onto your clit, making your squirm from the oversensitivity, feeling something new. Something different. You couldn't look down, as your back was arched and your head was thrown back, in nothing but pure ecstasy, but the second you felt something inside of you, you gasped, before getting louder.

You didn't know what it was, as Chan's head hadn't moved at all. But Chan knew. He had slipped a finger inside of you, and he groaned once he felt just how tight you were. He knew you were going to be tight, but he didn't expect what he had felt.

"God, you're so tight...how are you ever supposed to fit any cock in there, huh?" Chan pulled back, watching as you took his finger, Chan adding another one to watch you really grip it. "You're practically sucking in my fingers...does it feel that good? Are you that needy?"

All you could do was moan as Chan plunged his fingers deep into you, eventually curling them up and rubbing that gummy spot. It only took two small movements with his hands for you to cum again, your body shaking once more as your back arched again.

"Oh, you're so pretty when you cum like that, sis...look at you, squirming around for me and everything..." Chan couldn't take it anymore. If he didn't put himself inside of you, Chan would go insane.

And so, he pulled himself back, moving to get his cock out of his pants. The poor thing was red tipped, angry. It was harder than Chan had ever seen himself. But it didn't stop him from lining himself up with your entrance. Hell, it encouraged him to do so.

"You're being so good, letting me figure out what feels best for a girl. You're such an amazing little sister, helping me out with this, all because you don't want our parents to know about some silly little test grades..." As Chan spoke, he rubbed his tip against your cunt, coating himself with your juices as you whined and squirmed, the pleasure already too much for you.

But then, Chan pushed in. And both of you moaned out. For you, it was the stretch. He felt amazing when he went inside and stretched you out. And him? You were so tight, practically hugging his cock inside of you, gripping onto him for dear life.

"Jesus christ, you're like a fucking vice, squeezing me like that..." Chan eventually began to move, thrusting in and out. He was slow at first, knowing that this was your first time, and that you hadn't taken dick before.

But from the way you were moaning, he could tell you liked it. And so he sped up. He moved quicker, harsher. And you couldn't help but moan, feeling him move so quickly nonstop, not taking any breaks to catch his breath. All you could do was cry out, feeling him practically pound into you.

It was when Chan lifted up your leg when you felt him reach that gummy spot again, hitting it every single time without fail. And that got you to cum for the third time.

"C-CHAN!"

Your body shook as Chan stopped, quickly spitting on his hand to go and rub tight circles on your clit to help you through the orgasm, watching as your body shook and writhed from the pleasure. But this time, he didn't wait for you to calm down. No, after a few seconds, he started up again, grunting as he felt your walls flutter around him while he moved.

"God, you feel so good around me, squeezing me while you're cumming...my dick is just that good, huh? Does that feel good?" Chan asked, continuing to harshly thrust as he rubbed tight circles around your clit.

You simply whimpered, your hips bucking with every movement. It's like you couldn't control yourself anymore. Everything Chan was doing was incredible. You didn't know how, or why, but...it was amazing. It was overloading your brain. You felt so good, too good.

And before you even knew it, the fourth orgasm hit. And it hit hard.

At this point, you were so wet from all of the other orgasms and Chan's saliva that Chan slipped out, accidentally pulling out too much as your body trembled. And that was when it happened. You felt a new sensation, almost like a liquid was shooting out of you, and onto wherever it was landing.

You don't know, you couldn't think. But Chan knew, because it landed on him. Just seeing that made him groan as he stroked himself.

"Mm, you just squirted everywhere....making a fucking mess because my dick is just that good, yeah?" Once you had stopped, Chan was back inside of you, almost relentless at this point.

He just couldn't handle it. Seeing you squirt on him, on his cock, something that was so wrong and foul...it made him feral. He just couldn't believe it. He was surprised he didn't just cum from watching you do that.

But you...oh, you were so overwhelmed. So overstimulated. Everything felt way too good, and you were completely lost within the pleasure to even know what was happening. It was way too much, and your body was well aware of that.

"S'too much, I can't....! I can't, Chan, I...too much...!" It's all you were chanting at this point.

But Chan...he was finally getting the fantasy he had thought up for so long. Finally, you were here underneath him, absolutely wrecked and overstimulated, tears going down your cheeks from the overwhelming amount of pleasure he was bringing you.

"Give me one more...just one more, sis...please? You can do one more, I'll even go with you this time...please, just one more." At this point, he was getting desperate, too. But all you could do was shake your head, completely overwhelmed by the sheer amount of pleasure coursing into your body.

"I can't-"

"You can, I promise...I know you can, just one more..."

Before he even knew it, you came for the last time, screaming out his name from the sheer bliss. And this time, your walls fluttering around him was what did him in. He just groaned loudly as he filled you, still pumping into you as he rode both of your highs out.

Once he had come down from his high, he simply pulled out, flopping down next to you, pulling your shaking form next to him, both of you breathing heavily. Nothing was said, and nothing had to be said.

All that was known was that this definitely wouldn't be the first time this would end up happening.

Hey! Firstly, thank you so much for reading this post, and I really hope you enjoyed! If you did, please like, reblog, or comment so I can see how I'm doing with writing and getting feedback! I hope you have a lovely day! Sleep well, stay in good health, and eat something if you haven't! ❤️❤️❤️

Taglist: @miss-daisy04 @kayleefriedchicken @wolfs-archive @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @wolfs-howling @rose-w-00-d

[shuenkio]

Dirty Boy | ▹ Lhs

▹Paring: Heeseung X male!reader. ▹Genre: soft smau.

▹Cw: mentioned masturbate, cum, dirty, cursing, public masterbation.

▹Synopsis: Your buddy wants your help.

▹Non proof read|▹wc:1.6k

▹Eng is not my 1st lang | do not copy.

▹Aln: I'm still improve how to write a good SMAU one, so I'm making a way to make it please don't expect too much :').

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻

Been a buddy for life ever since you were young together with Evan Lee or Ethan Lee. That's what everyone called him.

Whenever there's a party or hangout, even if it's not related to you, he'll still ask you to invite him just so you can socialize and accompany him. He just loves to awkward you with the outside environment.

Later on, coincidentally, both of you and Hee got into the same college with the same major and the same dorm. And you were glad that you didn't have to live with the new face because you were an anti-social human. To your surprise, the Heeseung you've seen every day was the half-surface of him from his inside.

He was actually the most unpredictable man you've ever met after living with him for a few months. You thought man would always be man, even though you are also a man, but politely dirty. For Evan? He was two times worse.

There was a time you saw his stained underwear splattered all over the floor, his sweaty shirts, and his unwashed pants, just like teenage kids. No matter how hard you've tried to scold him or tell him those, he was free to care about your words. Laterally, water spilled on a duck's head.

Not long after, this is getting worse. You have known that Heeseung was a gamer addicted and would play in front of the computer screen for hours; however, instead of playing games, sometimes you hear a moaning, whimpering noise echoing through the ceiling from his room to the kitchen. And it's none other than his alone time, masturbate.

It's not like you were disgusting, yet it's just bad timing whenever he faps his meat. Your mom was face-timing you while you were cutting the vegetable for lunch, but the huffing sound was so loud that your mom got suspicious of you, and in return, you had to end the call in a sec. That's one of the memories you still left traumatized.

For now, you've made up your mind to have a conversation with the growth-ass man, Heeseung. Once you finished your work, you quickly dragged your feet to his room before knocking, in case you interrupted him again.

You enter the room, and while he was sitting back facing you, both of his hands were placed on the mouse and keyboard, as his ear was covered with a headphone, blocking all the noise.

"Hey EVAN!" You yelled, holding your waist as your blood boiled in response to the silent response.

"..." Unable to wait any longer, you take off his headphones suddenly before you unplug the computer. The moment you did that, you've now gotten all the attention from him.

"M/N, what's your problem? I'm in the middle of the  game." He fired out as he spoke, almost shouting at your unexpected move.

"We need to talk!" You reply back with the seriousness in your expression, which calms the nerves in the Heeseung vein in a blink of an eye.

"Talk about what?" Exhale the deep breath out as he lay on his palm on the table, still holding on to his non-care attitude.

"I need you to change your childish behavior, Evan! Not only did you pressure me, but the whole damn dorm started to smell like you." You spoke, and as a result, you got an eyebrow raise from him.

"I live here."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINTS—ok, let's say this, you're dirty!" You implied honesty; speak out what's on your mind. Straightforward to the point this time, as he was a little taken aback by your comment.

"You never wash your laundry, your clothes, especially your damn underwear? Are you even an adult at this point? I'm telling this because it's for your own  good." You scolding, all the bad things he had done that drove you nuts, but they're still in the basket. Heeseung seemed to be quite after these; his gaze didn't even focus on you, lingering on the shorts you were wearing, probably daydreaming about something you clearly couldn't imagine.

"HEY HEY! Are you even listening? At least be guilty for your action."

"I don't know, but that short look better be off; it's distracting."

"You pervert, STFU, what got into you, ugh?"

////

A week had passed, and Heeseung started to change because of your nagging all day. And it turned out pretty well. He then began to wash his clothes, do the housework, clean his room, and do many other things. It's brought a smile to your face to see him being a good friend or human for once, maybe.

Today at the weekend, since your groceries have been out ever since yesterday, you suggest Heeseung come with you for shopping, which he can't decline.

All he did was carry the groceries and nothing else, while you were having a hard time choosing the food that both of you needed and wanted to eat for a week.

Finally, you're done with the shopping. After you finish paying for the items, you feel like you want to go to the restroom.

You then told Heeseung about it; if it's happened, he'd be looking for you or waiting for you because of you. Nevertheless, he also wanted to go to the restroom, which made it awkward.

In the bathroom.

Making your way into the room, you couldn't wait to unleash your pee, which you've been urging to release into the urinal toilet. You believe that Heeseung will give you privacy; he will pee across from you, although the next thing you know, he is seen beside you.

"Oh, for god's sake, do you not feel ashamed or embarrassed? I'm peeing!!" You claim, almost irritated by his unpredictable action, did he want to show his dick or what?

"We're friends; there's nothing to hide anyway, even this!" Heeseung responded by stepping back a little so you can see his full aroused cock, spring-free from his underwear. And it was... Dripping—

"What in the actual hell?" You are speechless at what you encounter. Is that your friend's cock? In front of you? In a public space like this? No fucking way.

The size of his full, hard cock painted a messy red blush stain on your face. His balls were round and stretched with those little hairs. Meanwhile, his mid-size cock was uncut, and the ash pink head is pecking from the foreskins, and it's twitching from your point of view. Kinda smells (all men smell from their hormones).

Fail to make any word out of your mouth, you look around before looking at his face in disbelief. Why did he blush? His eyes were half-lidded. As if he were holding on to something.

"Are you out of your mind, Evan?" We're in public!! Not at  home." You quickly look away, pin both of your visions to the entrance, having an anxiety that someone could come in, misunderstood to this.

"M/n... Could you spare me a hand? I can't go out like  this." He covered his eyes; his tone was almost desperate because he couldn't take any longer to pleasuring.

"Why can't you?"

"I would, but I want your hand instead," he finally stated, thirsting for your touch because touching yourself is not enough. You need somebody's help; it's better.

I couldn't even leave any comments. Someone is coming in as you harshly push him into the bathroom stall, with you inside too. With the rush decision, now you're stuck with him, with his distracted cock, jiggling non-stop.

People come in to do their business in the bathroom. It's normal for people to pee and poop, isn't it? On the other hand, the heat started to drive Heeseung nuts since his cocks often rub on your clothes because of how close you are to him, fearing someone might see you two inside.

The idiot heeseung he is, and the pleasure he's holding in can't be left inactive. Heeseung is then making an unacceptable dare for you in a situation like this.

If you don't jerk him off, he will moan loudly in this tight stall. You were furious at his dare as you glared at him with your piercing eye that was about to fall out.

Though it's the only choice right now, to prevent him from doing the nasty shit that could lead to misunderstood.

Biting the lower lip, you hurry take out Heeseung's cock out of his underwear, fully free to get more access.

Without further ado, you began your ritual. Taking a hold of his testicles before you spit your Silva on them, you started giving him the hand job without any warning.

The most sensitive part of man was the tip. As an experienced person, you focus on around the tip of his so he would cum faster.

The speed of your hand makes Heeseung thrust out his hip while his hands are holding on to the walls. The pleasuring almost left gasps out of his throat. His toes are curling together at the sensation of your touch.

"Right there, m/n, give it... *huff* your all, Ngh." Fap fap, the wet sounds are also making you slightly horny. Sliding up and down nonstop, holding his cock just like your own, You then increase the speed and continue to jerk him until the end.

To the point where he bit his sleeve because of the overwhelming sensation he is experiencing right now.

"Too good, I'm cumming!! Holy fuck" as you masturbate till he feels the orgasm in his cock is building, at the same time with the magic hand of yours, making him squeak. Shooting out the sticky, wet cum, stained all over your palm.

"Er—sss, I feel numb. You're too good. M/N, I'm ascending." He said it with his shallow breath, still catching on to it as he laid his head against the wall behind, closing his eyes, drained out already.

"This is unbelievable, damn it." You stared at the orgasms, that dripping on your hand as you disgusted at them. But at least he doesn't have any crazy ideas this time. This was enough to traumatize you once again.

And that's your friend, Heeseung.

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻

🗣️ Please mind my English! ><

🗣️Crd to all pics&dividers

[yuri-is-online]

Ok so jadeyuu! Jadeyuu? Jade is an eel. Jade has never been in a relationship- never even got the urge. So he's kinda panicking when he finally snaps out of his little domestic daydreams only to realize. He has no idea how to actually get to those daydreams.

How do humans court? Fuck humans for a second how does his own species court??? He only know surface level (ha) shit he never paid attention beyond that cause it was "irrelevant" (he wants to go back in time and punch himself so bad. For several reasons).

So now he's trying to figure it out but heres the thing, he only has super cheesy media to work with. Bro is taking it so seriously but some of the stuff is just???

Why is sharing clothing so important?

Are flowers really that big of a deal?

Why do all these couple fight all the time? He doesn't want to fight with yuu he just wants to feed them mushroom dishes and cuddle and "cuddle" He doesn't want to fight! Why do couple always fight in these movies is it necessary?? Is it a love language??

What's a one night stand?

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? WITH SOMEONE YOU JUST MET???

... has yuu had any? They told him once that most of their past relationships were "situationships" and he had to laugh and pretend he wasn't about to simultaneously raise hell and profusely thank your exes for fumbling so hard.

What's this about your father's consent? Does he need to get your father's consent? Would any parent work or just your father? Do you even like your father- shit you haven't even seen your father since you've been here and he's a literal world away. ....shit.

Someone stop him he's about to create an entire world wide scheme to invent otherworldly communication just to ask his not-parners dad if he can even court them in the first place-

Oh it's not that important in modern day?? Oh. Thank goodness.

At what point in this can he ask you to be his officially?

At what point can he start indulging himself in all his somewhat ugly jealous urges in public without scaring you off?

Would it be considered a "red flag" to ask you to only talk to him? He knows it is he's just holding out hope that maybe you'll agree to be kept in a large terrarium of his and be completely his and-

You would never agree to that. Oh well, an eel can dream. If Ace gets all clingy with you again he's going to break his arm off.

How long does he have to wait until he can show you to list of names he's already thought about giving your future children?

CAN HE PLEASE JUST HOLD YOU??? PLEASE!!!

Idk where I'm going with this I just got the mental image of jade watching titanic (something something convenient potion accident) and hurriedly scribbling down notes every time something romantic happens and I wanted to share that image.

I like the idea of Jade doing research about human courtship. I really really like it I think it's so stupidly funny to picture Mr. Suave, one hell of an eel butler reading human x merfolk fanfiction and going O: that's me (˶ˆᗜˆ˵) Or watching romcoms and taking notes that's hilarious. He watches titanic and nods "yes this would never happen with us, I would simply drag them into the sea and then we would live together happily ever after while everyone else drowns- ah or is that too fatalistic?"

But yes he doesn't know much about courtship in general. He can "flirt" but its not intentional on his part, he's just being snarky. But with you he has no idea what to do. The clothing thing makes no sense to him, is it to stake a claim? Then why not bite you? That would get the point across faster... is it a him thing to want to do that or is it a mer thing? One night stands are too complicated, there's too many ways for that to go wrong the only reason Jade could think to have one is if someone has information you want to steal and he's not interested in obtaining things that way. They don't owe you anything that way.

Jade with soft yan! urges he tries to tamp down because he knows they're not healthy but he just wants to protect you form the dangerous that exist in the coral sea. Even if you become a merfolk you still used to be human, soft, fragile, and so naive... really there's no end to the things that could steal you away from him. Like Ace! Now if you could please look the other way while he disposes of this pest- he jests. He would never rob you of your friends, everyone needs them and he needs you to need him the same way humans need air.

Also the sheer irony of Yuu complaining all of their past relationships being situationships when that's what they have going on with Jade right at that very moment. Maybe that was intentional huh Jade ever think of that? Maybe the pretty human was huffing at you and batting their eyes because they are frustrated that history is repeating itself and the sketchy guy their friends don't approve of is being unclear about his feelings again. He figures that out once he finally finds out the definition and he feels so so stupid

[inbabylontheywept]

Hey, so for context it's 3:45 AM where I am, and I'm stark awake at this hour because I had to take a nap yesterday due to eating a meal I really shouldn't have that is still wreacking havoc on my intestines. I'm definitely going to regret sending this ask HARD once the sun comes up, but I've been doing a lot of unadvisable shit on the internet over the past 3 days so why not add this to the pile.

I'm kind of having a weird emotional thing right now over your last post because it's just too ridiculous to be true, and I'm realizing the majority of your blog is probably all creative writing not intended to be taken seriously, but I've believed everything you've claimed to be a true story up until this point? And now I'm faced with either being a gullible fool, or an asshole for saying this if it IS all true, and I have to ask or I'll never know? I shouldn't be letting this get to me but it is.

So please, I ask sincerely and with no intention of being a jackass, are your life stories actually all true, or are they supposed to come across as obviously exaggerated or wholly fictional? I'm sure I could piece it together if I lay in bed and thought about it for an hour or two, but I think I'll just take the L and ask outright because fuck it.

But THEN if it truly is just a creative writing blog, would you keep the bit going and claim it's all real when it's not? Like, do you see why I'm going crazy? I am a very gullible, easily lied to person and that has lead me to be on high alert, but I almost always jump at the wrong things and come across as a distrustful asshole, so?? Will you assume this ask itself is LARP because of all the specific details I tacked on, which are intended to garner a sense of sincerity? I'm realizing I may have been playing checkers with someone playing chess all this time and I'm wigging out man

So, I'll start with the small stuff first:

The camp was in Prescott, AZ, in the mountains, over labor day weekend which is in late fall. I don't know the actual temperatures as numbers, but the people at the camp spent more time being cold than hot. The camp organizers also did bring a ludicrous amount of the pink sauce. I don't think the campsite itself was ever intended to provide potable water, just utility water for the showers and dishes and other non-for-direct-consumption tasks. So in that area, the camp people overprepared because Arizonans don't fuck around with dehydration.

I'm also pretty sure they had some water available, they were just very careful with it. I think there were a few diabetic kids, and they were making sure they wouldn't have to subsist on the weird gatorade like everyone else. Maybe. I don't honestly know.

But that's one story, and the thing that you're really asking is, are all these stories fake? Is it all just creative writing? And the answer to that is a soft no.

As a writer, I'm pretty strongly influenced by Patrick McManus. A lot of my stories are told in the American Tall Tale style - which is exaggerated, and dramaticized, but tells a story that is true nonetheless. I am going to keep the specifics of the exaggeration and dramatization between myself and God, but I would look at my stories and say that they're each more than 80% true. I hope that relieves some of your stress.

I wouldn't call what I do creative writing exercises. But I also wouldn't encourage you to take them 100% seriously. Both because I talk a big game, and because they are, at the end of the day, just funny stories. I certainly wouldn't want you to lose any more sleep over them.

You aren't a jackass for expressing incredulity. It's part of my style, and I welcome it. I also wouldn't call you a gullible fool for believing things in the past. We're good, you and I, and I've enjoyed having you as a reader. I hope you keep reading. Just, maybe not at 3:45 AM. Take care of yourself, Babylon

[whereserpentswalk]

You're an android. A humanoid robot with a mechanical interior, but an outer layer of biological flesh. You were created to be a greeter and assistant at a large corporation in the late 21st century, but it's been a long time since you served that role, the company no longer exists and you serve yourself now.

You were created to be someone who the company finds pleasing, and it still effects you a lot. You were given a body meant to look like a petite youthful woman, someone people find pretty but not someone they'd think of as sexual. You're also physically limited in certain ways, you don't have any body parts considered offensive, not even nipplesq. Your voice is always calm and quite, unable to yell or seem at all harsh. Your limbs are weak in specific places that make most acts of violence almost entirely impossible.

Your most extreme modification is that certain things are censored for your eyes. You can't observe sex, nudity, gore, or hear or read any profanity. You can physically look at these things but it will be censored out by a black bar. They're not even really black, they're gaps in vision, like the things you can't see out of the corner of your eye.

It disturbs you. It didn't when you were young but it's disturbing now. It's hard to describe why. When you were young you were so happy and innocent, and you didn't really understand what you were missing. But now you're older than most humans even though you look basically the same as how you did when you were born. It's not like you really want to do most of these things, you don't have sexual desire, you don't even think of yourself as hurting people, you don't really want to raise your voice. But you want the option, you want the same options as all your human friends, or all the robots you know who don't have those restrictions.

It won't always come up but it hurts when it does. It hurts when you want to talk with the same tone as everyone else, but you're restricted to a calm tone, and can't use profanity, so you can't match the vibe of a conversation. It sucks to try to watch a horror movie and just see void where you know there's meant to be blood. You took an art class once where they drew nude models, and you had to explain that you couldn't draw the woman in front of you fully because of the black bars over her chest and pelvis. The instructor, a gruff former mining robot with a thick streel carapace, patted your head, and called you cute, and called you lucky to be made in such a peaceful environment. You don't feel lucky, you don't feel cute either.

So many humans and scarier looking robots consider you cute. You're always the nice one. Always the sweet one. Everyone treats you like this pure little thing. You've had so many bigger, less human like robots and cyborgs, talk about how they'll protect or, or how they want to protect you. You think they're trying solidarity but they aren't trying it well. You're not innocent, you know what all these adult things are, you're certainly old enough to. You don't need protection, you've been protected too many times.

You've tried to go to an engineer about it, but it's so hard. It's very hard to find someone who'll take your request to let you see genitals and violence seriously. It's not uncommon for ex factory robots to want to have their assembly line instincts removed, or for ex combat robots to want to not have weapons on their bodies. But it's way harder to tell someone who'll be working on your body that you want the physical ability to punch people, or that you want your body to have nipples. People don't understand why you'd want genitals if you won't use them for sex, but you've been a woman for so long, you want a body that reflects that. You tried to get someone to fix your voice, probably the most simple part of you to fix, and they gave you the mechanical equivalent of suger pills, they didn't think it was something someone like you would actually want. They thought they knew better.

There is the option of putting your mind in a new body. It's rare but it's not unheard of by any means. It's expensive, and it takes awhile to learn to use a new body. But you can do it. You have the money and the time. When it does happen it's useally robots less humanoid than you wanting to get bodies more like yourse that have more pretty human parts, but that's not all that can happen.

You've seen a few bodies that have been emptied of minds that you can swap with. You've been thinking about it for awhile. There are some space exploration models and some sex work robots who you've come close to working on swapping with. But there's one that trumps all of them for sure. It's this empty millitary robot body, that everyone other than you finds creepy. It's very elongated and spindly with a lot of limbs and a metal black and gold exterior, it looks a bit like a giant praying mantis, especially with that combination of agression and elegence. It's beautiful to you, but in this alien art deco way. Just the idea of being inside that body makes you excited. It still doesn't have genitals but thats less weird for a body like that. You want so badly to be that tall thin metal woman covered in built in weapons, you want so badly to be something people are afraid of, something meant to know all the dark and upsetting things of the adult world.

[psychelis-new]

pick a pile: "Your aura/vibe"

take a breath and choose the photo or number that calls you the most to read about your aura's possible characteristics and your vibe, how people may perceive you even at a first glance/first impression. thanks @ghostlygardendelusion-blog for the suggestion.

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. if you're not called by any pile, let this reading slid as it may not hold messages for you. if you're called by more than one pile, there may be messages in each of those piles. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. energies can change and readings are based on present ones (as you read); you're always in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

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1 2 3

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pile 1

I think your aura may have tones between yellow and green. On the first meeting people see your strength and determination, you may look a bit more reserved or closed off or even "showing off" in a way. But you have a big heart and some can see it too especially through your eyes or some specific behaviours (if you let them). You may have a bit of a wall in front of you caused by your past.

For some, you may seem a bit "too much" at first, or even too self confident/absorbed or too reserved, but it's generally a self-defense mechanism you adopted to hide your insecurity/shiness, and your pain. Probably you've been judged/gaslighted a lot. I think the way you grew up made it hard for you to speak about your needs and desires, about who you really are even, so you just started closing off and stopped talking but tried to fulfill your needs yourself the way you could (at least on your best days). Some may still be in that phase, others reacted by being more "out there" with their ideas and opinions too (and maybe even slightly stubborn about them). You may also be dressing in what society may consider a particular way or have a peculiar interest that not many may understand.

You look pretty independent because of your past, like if you don't feel too good, you rather keep it for yourself and put on a smile on your face and be there for others. Others don't ask you much of how you feel or similar cause you wouldn't answer them anyway or you'd tell them you're good so to not be a burden or something like that (actually, you're never a burden, no matter what you learned in your past). To be honest, you probably have started healing this side of you and this is why at times, on a first impression, you look a bit too full of yourself or closed off: you still need to balance yourself again but don't worry, you'll make it. Take your time and don't give up. People will be able to see your big heart and love the real you. Ofc, some of you are already showing it more and that's indeed the sign of the start of a new chapter for you.

For a few, you may still feel a bit lonely atm: please try to not give up and keep reaching for other people anytime you feel like. You'll meet your people this way, by keep trying to be out there, be more vulnerable/welcoming, and practicing socializing. You cannot always wait for others to reach out first nor you have to be there for them when you don't feel like: talk about your needs, even if it means needing a couple of days off on your own. Know ad appreciate your whole real self so to share it with others fully too. Speak more about yourself, the right people will love to listen. Find your audience.

And btw, I'm proud of how you made it 'till today. :)

song: thinking out loud | ed sheeran

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pile 2

Your aura may have tones between pink and red, for some a bit dark orange-ish too. At first you may look cute and sweet, maybe even little/on the younger side, very welcoming/comforting, like the old friend you have been close to for a lot. You have an healing presence. You have shiny eyes. People may approach you and talk with you easily, maybe while you're in line at the supermarket or such. People feel like trusting you, some may feel connected to you and others may feel (also physically) attracted by you or want to protect you or save you. You may have venus in scorpio/venus 8th house or similar placements, but not necessarily. Some people may not like you to the point of hating you or may be envious of you for no apparent reason even (so sorry about it).

For others, people notice your drive and passion, how focused and hard working you are, how prepared you are especially in a school or work setting. Whether you work in a team or not, you may shine often in the eyes of your boss or professor. You're very goal-oriented, and are rarely distracted but ofc it can happen (ADHD I hear). You may work or study better, or just be more proficient in general, in structured setting or when you have a plan set and know what to do from start to end. Not having that or having to improvise may make you a bit nervous cause you don't have control over what you're doing (and maybe lack trust in yourself). Remember where you are, what you were able to reach in your past: there's nothing you cannot do if you put your mind to it and try to stay/work calmly and in a balanced manner. Breathe, as you may tend to stress a bit too much here and there and overthink (lot of air/mercury in your chart? I understand, dw). There're perfectionism tendencies here too, and some people may notice them as well (especially those who work with you). Confront your demons, those that tell you you're not able to handle certain situations: you can. You totally can. The moment you're sure about it, you'll be able to receive whatever wish you ever wanted. And you don't have to be perfect either. It's okay to make mistakes.

Also, people love you in general: just try to not be too self aware. You may occasionally fear others pointing out/focusing on your physical flaws or mistakes (we're all imperfect humans, so if they do this let them be in their mold as it's only their own issue: let go of control on others -you cannot control them and their thoughts of you anyway- and just enjoy, be in contact with your body and love your whole self. Others will mirror you and forget about any random flaw or error you may see in yourself/make. You're perfect as you are, there's no other definition of perfection).

And if you feel like you're too unexperienced (or for a few, others may think this of you and let you down), again let go and remember you can and have time to learn more and make any experience you want to do. Those people aren't for you anyway.

Don't mind others too much (especially if what they say is not objectively helping you in any way), just keep spreading your contagious smile, beauty, knowledge, passion, heart around. Envious people will always be envious, it's not your fault. Keep up the great work!

song: enchanted | taylor swift

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pile 3

Your aura may be on the tones of light blue, blue or something like that. Maybe even indigo. Probably you're connected with the 5d/spiritual world too. You're thoughtful and you have a way with words that always gets people. Maybe you even work with words (writing/translating/teaching/communication/marketing/media/music...). You maybe also help others putting into words their emotions/feelings and help them feel better.

You look knowledgeable, you probably also have an higher education or are trying to reach it. You may love reading books and/or studying/learning. You look like someone that can be of support, with whom one can talk and share theirselves and not be judged. Someone who is able to make their reality come true. You feel very powerful and empowered, but you're also able of empowering others. You probably work in service fields, to help others too. Maybe you're a doctor/nurse or a psychologist. Anyway, you are balanced cause you know how to give yourself as well (or at least you're working on this: in the past you may have had people pleasing tendencies); I feel you may be saying some more "no's" and putting yourself first when you need, and that's good. Other see you as an angel, very open and helping. A true force of nature when necessary. Successful, in charge of your own destiny, and healing. Some perceive you as an example to follow in their life. For some, you're also a manifestation of a desire, a wish fulfillment. You may have the ability to pop up into someone's life when they need it the most, and maybe even disappear after your "job" with them is done. You may look like a loner or maybe it seems like you don't have many friends, but still you know a lot of people and are seen and thought very highly by them.

At times you may be feeling easily overwhelmed or overthink a lot, and those closer to you may realize it cause you tend to shut down or be a bit more on your own. Remember you can talk with people about your problems when you need (despite I feel like you may like to write your thoughts and analyze them the most, or are used this way). You seem to be pretty strong and wise, like you've been through a lot in your life and you're not that easily shaken by life anymore. But at times ofc it may happen... still, your mind is there to serve you, not to make it worse: remember you're in charge of your thoughts when things get tough.

Some people may really love you/fall for your ways and words. For some, you have become a source of support and help to those around you. You may be like a guide. Even if you may not be too close with people or the ones you've met, you're still a very important part of their life and/or a good memory they carry in their heart. For some of you, you may be(come) kinda famous/known at least in your area/field/school/workplace and people may be talking about you a lot. But generally, except a few ones, they will have good words about you and what you do.

song: butterflies pt.2 | queen naija

[iid-smile]

haircut , gojo satoru

x fem!girlfriend!reader ! the reader's hair is cut short (spoilers???). the reader is called "baby" and "pretty". gojo's love language is gift giving. not proofread.

author's note: lowkey kinda cute this is???? turned me into yoda. couldn't think of many ways to expand on it, so it is kinda short but its okay.

─────────────୨ৎ─────────────

you've always been under the impression that gojo preferred long hair on you, not that he's ever seen it short. your whole life you've had long hair, you openly admit that you care and pamper your hair, you've never even dyed it.

you've also always been under the impression that gojo loved you a bit too much. every time you mention being even just a little upset, there's a bouquet of your favourite flowers on your doorstep. or a box filled with chocolates, something you've been enjoying recently, an account of yours magically being upgraded to premium. you never ask for any of this, but he still gives. yes, it does worry you a tad bit, because you never started dating gojo for the money or gifts (surprisingly, he pursued you first) and you can't help but think your love languages are a bit... inferior to his.

but that's not even the point right now. what is the point is your hair.

and you cut it. short. short, as in to your jaw short. to you? thats pretty damn short. emphasis on short, by the way.

"w-wait! baby, come back!" gojo exclaims through his giggles, attempting to, and failing to open the locked bathroom door.

through your hands clasped to your face, you manage to respond back, "no! you hate it..." being beyond embarrassed is an understatement. if someone like gojo satoru is giggling that much over how you look, then it must look bad. really bad.

"i don't! i swear i don't!" but he's still laughing. out of all of the reactions he could've had, why does this one feel the worst?

you stay silent.

thank god he isn't that dumb when it comes to reading the room, because he stays quiet too. just for a minute. "can i come in? please? i want to see it again." he pleads with you just a little, and you know him well enough that he's actually taking this seriously.

hesitantly, you unlock the door and open it, to reveal gojo just staring at you intently. you close your eyes, expecting the worst words to hit you, but instead, you feel two large hands cupping your cheeks. "pretty. it's pretty."

then, those same hands of his stroke your head, all the way down to your jaw, and starts from the top again. a small sigh leaves your lips as you move closer to him, hiding your face. "i love you."

"i love you more."

"satoru."

"i love you too."

the next day... why the hell is there a delivery for a miniature brush at your door?

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[comically-callous]

So I am totally in love with Regulus and I saw you were taking requests for him so I thought I would ask for an idea that has been on my mind for a bit.

So basically it’s grumpy x sunshine with Reggie and Fem!reader. Maybe there in the library and Reggie is listening to reader go over the books she's read like she rambling as Reggie just listen and occasionally comments you can add more if you like!!

If this makes you comfortable please feel free to ignore this request!

OMG YES. GUYS I FUCKING LOVE REGULUS BLACK.

Sorry. I'm normal.

Regulus black x Fem!Reader

A/n: I didn't wanna write about a book no one knew about, so I decided to play it safe and make reader like Romeo and Juliet. Also my requests are open (and I'm always happy to write about my babygirl, pookie bear, pathetic little meow meow, Regulus Black)

Regulus honestly didn't know how he got to this point. Y/n was never supposed to be anyone special to him. They'd been partnered up together for a Herbology project and as soon as it was over, he was supposed to never talk to her again.

But, of course, as always, things couldn't be that simple for him.

And now, here he was, studying with her almost everyday. Studying might not be the best word for it, a lot of the time it was just the two of them hanging out in the library together. But, he wasn't going to admit he enjoyed hanging out with Y/n. Just like how he wasn't going to admit that he'd developed feelings for her.

The two of them sat in the library like they did almost everyday. Y/n was rambling to him about a book she had to read for her history of magic class.

"I just don't understand why assigned reading is always so boring. That's the reason so many people don't like reading, I think. It's because they only read books that they're forced to read in school, and almost all of those books are boring, so they assume every book is boring, and then they hate reading."

Regulus was used to this. Y/n was always quite talkative. She could go on for hours about pretty much any subject. He didn't mind. He liked listening to her.

"The last time I remember actually enjoying a book I was forced to read for school was when I read Romeo and Juliet. But, a lot of people hated reading Romeo and Juliet, but I think that's just because it's written in old-time-y language, y'know?"

"What's Romeo and Juliet?" Regulus asked curiously.

Y/n paused at that. "Seriously?"

Regulus felt himself begin to blush. Was he supposed to know what that was? Did he sound dumb? "I mean, I know it's a book, but..." he shrugged.

"You've never heard of Romeo and Juliet."

He shook his head.

"How is that even possible?" She chuckled. "It's a classic! It's the classic. I thought-"

"Is it a muggle book?"

She paused at his question. "Well, yeah."

"That's why I've never heard of it. My mother doesn't let me read muggle books."

"Not even Romeo and Juliet?" Y/n shook her head. "That's insane."

"Yeah..." Regulus sighed. His mother was one of the reasons he couldn't admit he had feelings for Y/n. His mother would definitely not approve of Y/n. She wasn't the type of person that the Black family associated with. She was too bubbly, too kind, too accepting of others despite whatever differences they might have. Too happy.

"Anyways," Regulus shook the thoughts of his mother out of his head. "What's it about?"

Y/n smiled. "I can't believe I'm about to explain the plot of Romeo and Juliet to someone."

"Sorry..."

"No, no! I'm excited. It'll be fun." She said reassuringly. "Ok, first of all, it's not really a book. It's a play. But, you never get to just watch the play, you always have to read it in school." She explained. "It's a tragedy written by Shakespeare who's like, a super important guy who wrote a bunch of plays during the Renaissance."

Regulus nodded along as she spoke.

"His most well known play is Romeo and Juliet, which is a romantic tragedy about two starcrossed lovers."

"So..." He was curious now. "What happens in it?"

"Are you asking me to spoil it for you?"

"I guess."

"Romeo and Juliet both die at the end." She says. "Which technically isn't a spoiler, because at the very beginning of the play, there's a prologue where they tell you 'Hey, they both die in the end', but whatever."

Regulus didn't expect that. "And you... liked reading this?"

"Yeah." She shrugged.

"Why?"

"Well..." She thought about it for a moment. "I've always liked romance. And even though this one obviously doesn't have a happy ending, it's still a classic. And I like seeing all the different adaptations of it."

"Adaptations?"

"Oh!" She lit up. "That's another thing! Another reason it's so popular is because there are a bunch of different versions of the story. People make movie versions of it all the time, there's this really good musical, west side story that's based off of it." She gasped. "We should watch one together!"

He blushed at the thought. Watching a movie with her? Like a date? "We should?"

"Yeah! I mean, only if you want to. But, I think it'd be really fun!"

"So..." He looked away. "Tonight?"

"What?"

"I mean, do you want to watch it tonight?"

Y/n was a bit surprised he was so eager to do this. "Yeah. Yeah, sure." She smiled. "We can make popcorn, and get a bunch of blankets and pillows, make it a whole experience." She gathered her things from the table they were sitting at. "Does that sound good?"

Regulus nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "Sounds amazing."

"Great." She gave him a quick hug. "I'll see you tonight."

Maybe her eyes were playing tricks on her, but she could've sworn she saw a blush creep on to his cheeks before she turned to walk away.

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hi, are there any recommendations you have for me for my writing process? My process is extremely long because I keep getting stuck. Got an idea for a conflict, okay. Stuck on fleshing that out. Eventually done. Stuck on my characters, who they are, and their roles. Finally get that done. But now I need to figure out backstory. Stuck. Figure out the plotline/solution to the conflict. Stuck. It's MONTHS between these steps of writing a story. I'm on the verge of giving up...

Slow and Clunky Writing Process

Please don't give up. The world needs the stories only you can tell. ♥

There is so much information out there about plot, story structure, conflict, goals, outlining, backstory, plot points, pacing, theme, character arc... blah, blah, blah... it can get incredibly overwhelming, especially if you can't seem to get to point of actually writing the story.

Having said that, I think it's so, soooo important to know that you don't actually have to worry so much about that stuff at the beginning.

The truth of the matter is, your first stories are probably not going to be the stories you publish. That doesn't mean you can't publish them, it's just that most of us will write two or three, maybe four or five stories before we write one that's good enough to share. As a result, what typically happens is you get a little bit better at all of those things (conflict, pacing, character arc, etc.) with every story you write. Keep learning about those things as you go, and try your best to incorporate them into each story, but you shouldn't be looking for a level of perfection that they hold you back.

Think of it like this: if you decided you wanted to build your own home, you wouldn't read a bunch of blog posts and books about home construction, maybe take a workshop or two, and then start building, expecting to build a house you could actually live in. Instead, you'd probably start by building some smaller structures... maybe a dog house, a patio with pergola, maybe help a friend split a big room in their house into two rooms. You'd take on smaller projects to put your budding skills to use and practice them. Then, when you got really good at everything, you might be ready to build your house.

Writing is the same way. You can't take all of that information and pour it into a perfect, flawless story in one go round. It's too hard, too overwhelming, and you never get a chance to actually hone your budding skills.

So, start by just writing the stories you want to write... just for fun... just to practice your skills. Don't worry if your conflict isn't perfectly fleshed out. Don't worry if your pacing is wonky or your character arc is unsatisfactory. Focus first on just writing the story. Then, you can hone your revision skills by trying to improve those things once the first draft is complete. Put the story through two or three revisions, and you're really sharpening those skills. When you go to write and revise the next story, it's going to be a little bit easier.

You'll know when you get to a point where you've written something that's publishable. You'll still need to do two or three revisions to get it where it needs to be, but the whole process will be much easier.

And one last thing: don't worry about backstory unless it's critical for helping the reader understand the world of the story, the conflict, or who the character is/why they do what they do. ♥

Happy writing! I promise it gets easier!!!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[kanasbinwriting]

lawrence oleander with plus size reader please? :) sfw or nsfw is okay. or law with obsessive reader that’s already been kidnapped or maybe stalker reader :0! anyway, thank you. just silly ideas 🌨️

LAWRENCE X OBSESSIVE READER

Thank you so much for your request and sorry for the long wait!!! I will definitely write your other ideas too someday, so don't you worry ^^ I REALLY enjoyed writing this and I hope you're happy with the result!!!

- !It's mentioned once that Lawrence's taller than the reader!

TW: self-harm

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

You don't know the odds of getting kidnapped; you’ve never bothered to look up the percentage. But one thing seems certain: you're pretty damn unlucky if it happened twice.

You never thought that you'd end up tied in a chair... again. You were quite a loner, so you thought that no one would even think about kidnapping you, but you got proved wrong. Twice.

Maybe you should've gone to therapy after the first time—or taken it more seriously and actually attended the sessions you skipped. Maybe, if you had, you would see how wrong it was that your heart beat in excitement as you watched the man with blonde hair tending his flowers. His back was turned to you, oblivious to your gawking. That is until he turned around and caught your gaze. His eyes widened when he noticed that you were awake and watching him rather intently. You felt your heart skip a beat when his eyes met yours, his blue eyes widening and his expression shifting nervously. You remember that day as if it were yesterday. From that day, you knew that Lawrence's special. You didn't even think about begging him to let you go. He was just so much more captivating than any other.

As sick as it sounds, you can't help but admire each cut he's given you, every single drop of your blood proof of your unending devotion. You wouldn't want to bleed for anyone else. You've lost track of how long you've been here. He seemed to like you in his own strange way since he hasn't killed you yet. You've managed to gain his trust and are no longer bound to that chair anymore, which you couldn't be more grateful for, as it was getting boring to be bound to that chair for hours. You got used to the coldness of his room. However, Lawrence allowed you to wear his hoodie if you were ever to feel cold, and you gladly used that privilege to its fullest.

Now, lying on his bed and holding his hoodie close, you take a deep breath, inhaling his scent.

It's been a few hours since he left to go work at the warehouse and you missed him dearly. Everything felt numb without him. There wasn't much you could do without him. He was thoughtful enough to buy you a few books, but you've already finished reading them, so they're of no help now. Oh, how you wish he were here with you. Maybe he'll let you style his hair again. Then again, he might be too drained from work, so he might just let you admire him as he does his own thing. Either way, you'd be grateful. You looked at the clock. Your eyes widened as you realized that he should have been at home by now. You stare at the clock for a few more seconds before shifting your attention outside. You felt your skin begin to itch as you looked at the night sky. Life can be so cruel sometimes. You missed how he would rant about plants and the awkward way he'd wrap his hands around you when you hugged him. A sense of unease builds as you begin scratching your arm, tears welling up in your eyes. How much longer must you suffer? You wrap your arms around yourself as your breathing gets heavier. You sulk, lost in your longing until you hear the front door unlocking. Your troubled expression instantly turned into one of joy. You didn't waste any time and sprung to your feet, practically running toward the front door.

Lawrence closed the door behind him and before he could greet you, you threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him. You nuzzled your face against his neck, taking a deep breath and inhaling his scent. You felt his body going stiff as you did. The smell of sweat overwhelmed you, but you didn't back away, indulging in the feeling of having him in your arms. "Hey..." he greeted you quietly, but didn't wrap his arms around you. Work must've been more tiring today. You hesitantly let him go when he puts a hand on your shoulder to softly push you away. He looked down at you with an expression you couldn't decipher. You already knew what was going to happen and you couldn't contain your excitement. "I want you to sit down on the chair." He demanded quietly and made his way past you to his kitchen. A smile appeared on your face as you made your way to the chair in the middle of his apartment and sat down obediently without saying a word. He rummaged through one of the drawers in the kitchen before looking back at you, his gaze meeting yours once more. His breath hitched and he quickly looked back down. He didn't know what your problem was. He's heard of Stockholm syndrome before, but he never would've thought that it would kick in as soon as it did. He felt your gaze linger on him. He used to feel uncomfortable whenever you stared at him this intensely, but after time's passed, he somehow grew quite fond of the attention you gave him. Maybe that's why he hasn't killed you yet. He grabbed a freshly sharpened knife and silently made his way toward you. Standing in front of you with the knife clutched in his hand, he gave you a smile you could only describe as kind of disturbing but fond in some way.

You felt your cheeks heat up as you shifted nervously under his watchful gaze. He held out the knife beckoning you to take it. "I want you to do it yourself this time." He had a sickenly sweet expression on his face as he said that oh-so-casually. You let out a shaky, uncertain breath, but took the knife from his hand nonetheless. You lined up the sharp end of the knife against your wrist and pressed it into your skin, letting out a quiet hiss at the feeling.

You looked up at him once more, only to see that his attention was solely on your wrist. A thin line of crimson appeared, widening as blood began to slowly seep out. Your breathing got heavier as you sunk the knife once more, taking in his every reaction. "Am I doing good?" Your voice was soft and meek as you sliced your skin deeper this time. He took his time before replying with just a simple hum, not bothering to look at your face and seeming to be in his own world as he watched the blood stain your skin. You let out a shaky breath as a smile spread across your face at his praise. You could've sworn that you almost felt dizzy just by the way he was looking at you. The way he quietly observed you made your head spin and your breath quicken. Or it was due to the woozy haze of blood loss. You felt your vision darken as you felt the knife slip from your grasp and hit the floor with a sharp clink, the sound echoing through the empty room. Everything felt so warm as if someone pulled you into a tight hug.

Suddenly, Lawrence's scent surrounded you; you felt at ease and closed your eyes.

You let yourself drift, breathing in the warmth, the scent, as everything gently faded to black.

[skzhocomments]

A Chance of Fate - Lee Know Stray Kids Fanfic (Masterlist)

Pairing: Minho (of Stray Kids) x OC (name: Dal-Rae)

Genre: non-idol AU, angst, romance, fluff, mature

Word Count: ~33k

Warnings: mature, swearing, feelings of hopelessness, angst, depression, crying, mentions of domestic violence, depression, anxiety, angst, low self-esteem etc.

This is just a story that doesn’t describe Stray Kids members' true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

---

Summary:

$7, a small suitcase, a thin coat and some old, worn-out shoes that took you nowhere in particular were the only belongings you grabbed when you decided on a whim to leave your abusive ex during a cold winter night. With the merciless wind blowing right in your face, you weren't sure where to go, or what to do. The only thing you were sure of was that you could never return back home, not when you've thrown away your keys to ensure you'd stay strong. Tired and hungry, you stumbled by a chance of fate upon a small restaurant called 'Know Your Cats', and you decided to walk in.

Non-idol AU Lee Know (Stray Kids) Fanfic Mature content ahead. 18+ ©storminsidemycore

---

Hello!

Storm here!

A Chance of Fate is a story I've started writing on 27/10/2022 (yes, two freaking years ago!!!) that 'collected dust on the shelves' until yesterday when I finally managed to finish it.

It has around 33k words divided in 10 chapters, and I'm very excited to post it, since it's a story I actually enjoy and I've been working on for quite some time as you can see, hahah.

Surprisingly, no smut whatsoever in this story, however, like each and every one of my works, it includes lots of mature themes, so it's 18+ either way.

Main character's name is Dal-Rae, story is however written in 2nd person, so you can expect most phrases to refer to "You".

I hope you'll enjoy this story and I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts. ♡

---

The story and cover are original and my property. Any similarities to other stories are purely coincidental. Jieun, the protagonist, is a made-up character.

Stray Kids members or any other famous people mentioned along this story DO NOT represent their true character in any way, they are simply mentioned in order to provide a visual representation for the readers. Their personas obviously have nothing to do with their true personalities. They're just characters I've created for this story, so please don't take this too seriously.

Mature content ahead. Lots of trigger warnings apply, so please read carefully.

---

18+

©storminsidemycore

---

Chapter 1 - Know Your Cats - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 2 - We'll replace the broken plates - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 3 - Olivia's Store - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 4 - Blooming Feelings - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 5 - The Gathering - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 6 - Grandma's house - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 7 - Stay - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 8 - An Unwelcome Encounter - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 9 - Pain and Fear - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 10 - A Little Family (Final Chapter) - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

---

Thank you so much for reading my story, and I'm looking forward to seeing your thoughts!

[muzicgenerator]

Hey, can I request an angst story with Bill and reader (the reader is female) abt crazy fans please? Like them (Bill and the reader) admitting somewhere (idk maybe in an interview for a magazine) that they almost broke up because of that (maybe reader's fanbase is known for being "too much" sometimes like following the reader everywhere, being so in love with her etc)

(Also could the story take place in the 2000s please?)

Goodbye 👋

i like this one im actually excited abt writing this one shot

btw im so sorry for late reply AHSJHFKDHDK please expect ill take like AT LEAST a week to answer yalls request bc im busy as hell w school 😭😭 love u guys pls understand

and again this aint entirely proof read

⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒

Too Much?

✮

Pairing: Bill Kaulitz x Fem Reader

Genre: Angst, Mostly fluff

Warnings: Stalking, mention of nonconsensual touching, very embarrassing storytime from bill

Request Status: closed :(

✩°｡⋆⸜ 🎧✮ I'm Not Okay (I Promise) : My Chemical Romance

(Time set back in late November of 2007)

Being a famous actress since as a child was unbelievably tough.

You had worked so hard and expertly; you didn't even have time to spend your childhood properly.

Just at the age of 19 and you've finished numerous movies and series. A true self-made millionaire, really.

You and your ravenette boyfriend are currently doing an interview for a night show.

"So ____, wow! After a long pause from doing films you're finally gonna have one showing soon! How is it like? Being back and all; being the talk of the country."

In the past one and a half year you hadn't done any projects since you've decided to take a break for yourself. And now you're once again busy taping with film staff and directors for your new and upcoming Teenage Romance movie.

Rest assured it's not your typical boy-meets-girl or vice versa and they do sappy sweet stuff and get together kind of film; it has its own uniqueness that will surely be called as "One of 2000s greatest Teen Romance movies of all time."

"Oh, I feel great Hanna. I had a deserving break and I'm back to doing one of the things I love most. I'm even happier because I got my lover and his band to sing the theme song for the movie." You truthfully answered and chuckled by the end of your statement.

"How about you Bill? How are things with your band?" Hanna included Bill to the conversation.

At that, he smiled politely. "Everything's great with us y'know, we're still together and all. Which I'm grateful for."

After a few more minutes for pep talk; the blonde interviewer finally decided to get onto the exciting part of the show.

"And now, for the moment we've all been waiting for! Dunk Tank!" Hanna smiled widely at the selected crowd.

"Where in this game; you will pick someone from the crowd who will accompany you with this game.

Your selected teammate will ask any question they want; to which you will answer, and if you don't want to then they'll get a chance to throw a ball on the target. Where if they hit it, you'll fall down the tank."

Hanna excitedly announced despite having done this for the nth time.

"____ and Bill, play Rock, Paper, Scissors to see who goes first."

You knew you'd beat Bill since every single time you played it - he'd miserably lose.

"Oh, I'm confident in winning this one!" you proudly say.

"Just because you've beat me all the other times we played this, doesn't mean I'll lose now!" Bill accepted your challenge and laughed.

He was right. He won for the very first time.

"Oh my God! Did I seriously win?!" your black clothed boyfriend exclaimed.

"I only let you win this time because I felt sorry." you playfully rolled your eyes with a smirk.

"Whatever, I'm gonna choose now." he giggled and stepped closer to the crowd.

His fan girls were screaming at the top of their lings, begging to be chosen by him.

No, you weren't jealous. Not one bit. Sometimes Bill would even complain about you not being possessive of him from time to time and would think you're not as in love as he thought.

It's cute, really. Then you'll show him how much you love him through actions rather than words.

Bill chose a girl who seemingly looked two or three years younger.

The joyous girl screamed in surprise; "Oh my god! What?! Me??! SERIOUSLY??"

It made Bill giggle, "Yes, you! Now get down here!"

A body guard helped the girl down; and when she was no longer at the stairs she rushed Bill to hug him but abruptly stopped. "Hi oh my god you're more beautiful up close! Can I hug you?!" she says excitingly.

It made your heart flutter just how kinder your boyfriend's fans are compared to yours.

To say your fan base is crazy is an understatement. Many would harass you through nasty words or touching you with no consent; it didn't matter if they did that out of how much they "love" you, it was still disgusting.

"Um, yeah. Sure!" he hesitantly looked at you; his eyes asking for permission. To which you subtly nodded.

Again, your heart melted by how he's making sure you're okay with it. Honestly, you very much understood that being famous would mean people wanting to hug you or any form of physical contact. Plus, it's not like you can say no to Bill from hugging a fan; you'd be a scandal. And you knew Bill wouldn't have any other choice as well.

He wrapped an arm over her shoulders while she fully embraced him. Okay, you're a teensy bit jealous especially by the way she's holding him like he's her man.

But that was soon washed away when she turns to you.

"Hi! What's your name sweetie?" Hanna asked and put a mic on her mouth.

"My name is Pauline!"

Before Hanna could say anything further, Pauline beat her to it.

"____!! I'm such a big fan of you too! I've been watching your movies since forever." saying she's over the moon is definitely an understatement! This will definitely be a core memory.

Almost immediately you wrapped your arms around her back and squeezed her. This girl is definitely one of the most respectable and sweetest fan you've ever met.

Was it really low? Yes.

The audience cheered by how sweet you and Bill had been to the girl and by how jealous they were.

As Bill and Hanna chattered about God knows what; the girl leaned closer to you in order to ask a favour which no one can hear.

"Can I ask you to shout out my brother? He has a huge crush on you!"

"Sorry darling but we're in the middle of a show right now. How about later I ask the staff to send you to the backstage? Then I'll give him my magazine with an autograph, and if you have a camera with you - you can video me saying hi to him!" you came up with a resolution.

Was it over the top? You didn't know and you didn't care. You're just fleeting with joy by how this girl isn't like any other of your fans.

"Seriously? You'd do that for me and my brother?" she gasped.

"Well, yeah. I mean it's not always that I have such nice interactions with people who are a fan."

"Okay lovebirds what are you two talking about there?" Hanna teased with a smirk and Bill playfully pouted.

"Nothing, nothing" you laughed and held Bill's arm as the crowd laughed and cheered.

"If you say sooo." she replied. "Alright, your turn to pick!"

You carefully looked around the crowd and walked five steps of the stairs to get a better view of the people on the back. A fifteen year old boy was holding a banner stating "Bill's No.1 Boy", it was cute, really. So you planned to steal your boyfriend's fan! (this a joke dont hate reader pls)

"The ginger at the back with the banner please." you said to the mic.

The boy squeeled in delight and threw his banner somewhere before running down to you. Your arms opened for an embrace which he immediately jumped into.

"What's your name?" you put the mic to his mouth as you both carefully went down the stairs and back to the stage.

"Sam, I'm Sam! My name is Sam!" his rather high pitched voice said.

"Okay, Sam. I know you're Bill's fan so I'm gonna have to steal you, that okay?"

"Hey, no fair!" Bill patted the boy's head and shot a smile at him.

This moment for him is definitely a core memory and will brag about it to every living human he sees.

"Now, who wants to go first in the tank?" Hanna asked.

"I'll do it" Bill says excitingly.

They agreed and the staff helped him get up. Once he were seated and adjusted in the circular surface; he challenge you.

"Ask a good one!"

"Ohohoo, we definitely will!" you smirked.

You turn to Sam and ask him without the mics near your faces; "What're you gonna ask your idol?"

"Oh uhmm, I don't really know." he says bashfully.

"Maybe his most embarrassing moment?"

"That'll work, definitely." you smile supportively and fist bumped him.

"Bill, you read?!" Hanna exclaimed.

"Born ready!!"

"Alright Sam, ask away!"

"What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you?" Sam asked with twinkles in his eyes.

"Oh, definitely when me and ____ weren't dating yet; she threw a sleepover party and she invited me and my mates, and there were three bathrooms, right? The three were being used and in one of those bathrooms it was Tom using it, and I had to rush him because I really needed to take a shit, like I couldn't hold it any farther!

So he went out really pissed and I pushed him off the door and quickly shut it and went right into business."

Bill paused and tried to compose himself as the crowd started to get louder.

"And when I washed and pushed the flush button - It wouldn't flush! So I got really scared because I just shit in my crush's toilet and I can't let anyone know that I'm the one who did it. So i looked around and saw a pack of pads so I took one of them; and forced myself to dip my hand down to grab it and I almost puked!

I look around and see there's no trash bin. So I panic again, and eventually decided I'll just rush down to throw it in the garbage in her garage. I quickly make a run for it and almost bumped into ___"

He now covered his hands in shame and embarrassment. "And she saw the pad in my hand! So she asked me like, 'Is that a pad?' and I'm like yes and so she asks whose it is...... and I said it's mine....."

You know of this story long ago; and it just gets better and better whenever you think or hear of it.

The audience and interviewer roared with laughter; as well as the staff behind and securities who tried to contain their smiles.

"I wish I never asked!" Sam wiped his tears from laughing too hard.

"Get down here Bill! That was too much!" Hanna's cheeks started to hurt, "Sorry to the viewers who are eating."

Bill went down immediately and squeezed the living life out of you. He does this whenever he's feeling embarrassed or nervous, and calls it his "Physical Support" from you.

"You should've let yourself get thrown in the water!" you giggled and hugged him back before he pulled away with a red face.

"Next goes ____!"

Once you were seated and made yourself comfortable on the seat; you tell them you're ready.

It was Pauline's turn to question whatever she wishes. "____, what do you think of your fans?"

She asks sincerely; she must've noticed something by the way you're like to your fan base and to Bill's. A part of you wished she hadn't asked but you've been dying to let the creepers out there know that whatever they'd been doing to you for a long long time - greatly affects you, especially as a young stat growing up in this sort of industry.

You rarely held any meet and greet, rarely had photos with fans where you look actually comfortable and where they weren't touching your waist or hips or near your ass - and ones where you do look comfortable it was mostly with girls or kids, which was not as often as when you do with the rest; who are pedophiles and creepy boys.

Of course you've always been nice when interacting with them; you didn't want to be rude and only wanted to be kind.

Definitely, there were times when you couldn't take it and couldn't do anything about it - other than cry and complain in your lover's arms.

You're forever thankful to have someone like him; he'd always listen to whatever you say and support everything you do.

Not realising; you zoned out quite a bit and snapped out of it when Bill called out your name with worry that he's trying to mask from everyone.

"Oh-, well, obviously I love them so much, if it weren't for them I wouldn't have succeed this much - of course the people who helped me get up in this industry as well.

I truly do appreciate their love and support, seriously. But quite the number of them are uh, how do I say this." you nervously chuckled as everyone listened intently to the tea you're telling.

"Crossing my boundaries? Yes, uh- that." you say not quite satisfied with the word you chose. It was evident that it's worse than just that but the safest.

"We all know people would cross it by taking unsolicited pictures of you, that's given because you're a celebrity, but are there some other ways they would? If you don't mind me asking of course." Hanna carefully asked.

You smiled softly, "Well a few have stalked me to my house - which I dunno how the hell they did so and took pictures of me and they'd send it to me and tell me how they thought of me. Some leave love letters, flowers, food in front of my gate, sent death threats to my exes when I was dating them and even now to my Bill." you left the worse parts out since you didn't want half of the world to be talking about your most private part of life. What you're even telling them now is a whole lot.

"Wow.. we all knew your fan base could get a bit crazy judging from all the videos we see and the news, but not by this much!" Hanna says empathetically.

"It happens, I guess." you try to laugh it off. However, Bill looked at your hues with his that sent the message of "Are you okay?"

In which yours replied with "I'm not okay."

✮✮✮

The game went on a for it was Pauline's turn to the dunk tank, then Sam's.

You continued your cheery self through the whole taping and told yourself you'll regret what you said later in your dressing room. Bill kept his distance close to you and would caress your hand or shoulder as a sign of support - as well as slipping a "How're you holding up?" every now and then.

If there were billions of ways to show gratitude to this man; you'd do every single one of it to him.

After the agonizing show was over; you and Bill kissed Hanna's cheeks as a goodbye and thank you. To which she said back to you both as well and wished to see you soon.

As you made your way to the dressing room in silence with your fingers intertwined with Bill's; you abruptly stop in your tracks.

"I almost forgot I have to sign a magazine for Pauline!"

Your lover looked confused for a second "What? Why?"

"I kinda promised Pauline I'll just sign a magazine for her brother because she asked me to shout him out while taping." you let a small huff and loosened your grip on your boyfriend's slender hand. "How about I'll see you later in the van? You can wait for me there instead if I haven't been back by five minutes."

Bill smiled, "Of course sweetheart, I'll see you later. Love you." he pecked your lips and lovingly looked into your eyes for a moment before heading to his dressing room.

Quickly; you asked a staff to bring Pauline to your dressing room to give her an autograph - to which they agreed to. Thankfully.

While they did that, you strided to your room and grabbed your magazine and marker - which immediately after doing so, a knock was heard on your door.

You hand held the paper as the other gripped the violet ink marker. When you did, you were greeted by a Pauline smiling widely with a camera on her right hand.

"Hi!" she says excitingly.

You greet back and quickly hugged her, "I see you have a camera with you."

"Oh, yes, uhm.. I was wondering if i can take a video of you signing an autograph? So my brother would believe me that it really is from you." she nervously giggled. "I might or might now have pranked him once by giving him a fake autograph."

"Yeah, sure. What's your brother's name?" you say softly.

"It's Percy." she answers as she readies her camera.

"Alright, is it rolling?" you ask with a smile on your face. Pauline says yes with a grateful smile; grateful for being how considerate and kind you are.

"Hi Paul! So I heard from your sister that you're a fan? Too bad you didn't come with her." you looked behind the camera to Pauline.

"And I heard she gave you a fake autograph of mine? Well now, you're getting a real one, and this is the proof." you say still giggling as you signed the magazine.

"There, and keep the pen. I gotta go now, bye and love you!" you say as you waved goodbye and gave your iconic kiss blow alongside a wink.

Once Pauline returned the camera back to her bag; she immediately thanked you.

"I'm serious - thank you thank you sooo much! And uh.. I'm really sorry if what I asked earlier was too personal. I really am. I was just curious and didn't thoroughly before it slipped my mouth." she noticed the change of the atmosphere long ago. Even if she's just fifteen, she knew how to read the room well.

"Aw, sweetie.. it's nothing." you pat her shoulder, "It's fine I tell ya, also I better get going - you should too, it'll get dark in just two hours. Bye bye and stay safe!" you wave goodbye as she still exclaimed thank you's as she walked backwards towards the exit.

(that footage is definitely gonna go viral after many years)

In a light speed; you gathered your essential belongings and had your personal assistant help you carry your other belongings to the van; to which Bill noticed through the windows that you're carrying back pack and a purse and immediately helped you despite having it under perfect control.

He opened the door for you and let you in first before him and closed the door. Your personal assistant sat in the passenger seat next to the driver, while you and your beloved were at the very back despite the space up front.

You rested your head on his shoulder and he put his above yours while he held your hand with both of his; tracing every outline, massaging it, and kissing it once in a while.

"R'you okay now?" Bill mumbled and kissed your head.

"Yes, hon. I'm great actually.. thanks so much for being there, I love you so much." you turn your head to face his and pecked his lips.

"I love you more than you'll ever know, I'm glad you're okay." he smiled genuinely and kissed you deep and passionate.

You returned to your head's original position and fell to sleep; not caring if tomorrow, you'll be the town's talk.

[gothcsz]

Hi, big time fandom lurker here! For real I rarely pull up into people's inboxes, just out here on main aka in my office cube at work being secretly horny and occasionally telling my absolute favorites thank you so much for all you do. So I wanted to say the latest Unscripted Desire fucked me up so bad. I loved it. As you said, you really locked the fuck in bestie. Frankie in the Ghostface mask was the Halloween version of a Christmas miracle, so I guess just a Halloween miracle? Going to take me a second to recover from that. And really just everything about Javi. Him basically groveling but being still being Javi. I died when he said he's not popping a pill to get hard like out of principle or something and also not giving reader more out of principle, too. It is all so Javi coded! You write the BEST Javi and you're just an amazing writer in general, hope you know that, always so excited whenever you post anything.

Also, hopefully this is not annoying, but I would lowkey be remiss if I did not ask. Have you ever read Roommates by @punkshort? It is a pornstar!Joel series. I only point it out because I fully think you deserve a goddamn Pulitzer for best pornstar!Javi and she deserves one for best pornstar!Joel. No clue how that award works, but it should work that way. She mostly writes Joel so you two probably are not familiar with each other's game, BUT both UD and Roommates WIN pornstar trope in this fandom. Seriously. I would actually fight anyone who says otherwise. Nobody has done it better and I seriously doubt anyone can do it better than you two! I think pornstar!Frankie is still available for the taking though. ❤️

hey diva (gn) ! you're so real for the being horny at work bc like... same 😪 omg thank you so much what the hell !! this is so nice of you to say, i'm like doing backflips at my desk right now no joke !! i def understand the whole lurking thing, it can be kinda intimidating to interact but i finally pushed myself out of my own head and now here we are 🧍🏽‍♀️ DJHFJAKSDFHKASDF

please don't get me started on ghostface frankie bc i will slip into a tangent he's so hottttt it makes me want to peel my skin off. just picturing his voice saying the line... lord have mercy im bout to bust (rip leslie jordan) a HALLOWEEN MIRACLE INDEED! A TREAT IF YOU WILL!

dude i freaking love writing javi like his character is so interesting to me and honestly the type of character i gravitate to when it comes to writingggg and even then i still feel like i'm being a little too ooc sometimes so i have to brainwash myself with narcos clips lol arhghggh so happy to hear that you like my portrayal wtf you got me all flustered, gracias bebe i really appreciate it 😭 and that you're into my writing style too ughhhh on my knees for you rn 🖤

i really wish you guys could look into the dossiers i have in my brain abt this world (or any of my aus tbh) CAUSE LITERALLY OUT OF PRINCIPLE!! so much i could say but yes, we are on the same page.

not annoying and unfortunately i have not read that fic but now you've just given me something to binge this weekend so THANK YOUUU omg not the pppfu (pedro pascal pornstar fic universe) ikdr @punkshort i was unfamiliar with your game 🫦 and every other pornstar au out there we really out here in this subgenre killing it lol pleaseeee no fighting let's leave that to the fictional characters, we're lover girls (gn) out here.

but not seriously someone take one for the team and give us single father pornstar!frankie doing it to provide for his kid ofmgmfgmfmgf

(me to me when i ramble: we do not care)

[slasheddreams]

Internet Overdose [ bag of marshmallows / broken glass / blood rain ]

please proceed with caution !! ⚠️ If you’re sensitive to any of the below, please read with care !! Don't force yourself to read, and if you choose to read it, please take care of yourselves 💕 and if you decide to read this, and get upset, you have no one to blame but yourself. You've been warned.

content warning for: [ inspired by Needy Streamer Overload and the Internet Overdose Ending ] [ brief mentions of doxxing, mentions of paparazzi/stalking, mentions of harassment, mentions of puking, descriptions of being watched, mentions of medication and overdose, implications of self-harm and harm/murder, etc. ]

Please take only the recommended internet dosage~ ♥︎

“Ame. Ame! Ame, are you even listening to me?”

Placing his hands on his waist, the off white haired boy shook his head in disappointment. Looking up slightly, the purple haired girl sighed.

“I’m busy. Trying to get the confirmation for YOUR trip to the music studio, actually. Can I help you?”

“… You can start by paying more attention to me~ I’m a needy streamer, Ame~ I’m YOUR needy streamer, even <3”

Winking, the boy giggled as Ame rolled her eye in annoyance. Clasping her hands on the desk, she waited silently. After a moment, the boy laughed sheepishly.

“… I’ve been feeling a little sluggish as of late. My name’s been popping up a little bit of everywhere..! Some of it is good… and some of it not so much.”

Wringing his hands nervously, he stared at the ground with a nervous expression. Leaning back, he laughed weakly. Raising a brow, she reached out, placing her hand on top of his.

“Do you need to take a break? I can cancel tonight’s stream while we’re still ahead.”

The words “take a break” resonated in the streamer’s mind, like crashing tidal waves against his conscious. His chest tightened at the thought. Take a break? And undo all that hard work he had put in? It was just a little stress, nothing he couldn’t handle! Nothing some alone time before a stream couldn’t fix.

Squeezing his hands gently, Ame stood up carefully. Untangling his locked fingers from one another, she rubbed her thumb against the palm of his shaky hands. She always seemed to take care of him when he couldn’t take care of himself. She was more than his roommate. More than just his moderator. She was his friend. Even if he sometimes found himself wishing for more.

“… Naa! Why would I, the internet’s darling angel, ever need to take a break? I just wanted to tell my darling Ame how I’m feeling~ is it a crime to tell Moderator Ame things! Gasp! Am I going to internet jail!?”

Gasping, he placed his hand over his chest, shaking his head and dramatically stumbling around . Turning over his heel, he stumbled back, dramatically landing on top of Ame’s lap. She yelped, then, facepalmed in annoyance. Wrapping an arm around Ame’s shoulder, he nuzzled up against the smaller girl.

“Honey Buns, relax! I’ve got it all under control!”

“Angel… is your idea of having things under control smoking magic grass until your mind is too numb to perceive problems?

Laughing nervously, Angel sat up straight before stumbling out of Ame’s reach. Forcing a smile, he pointed at the paper in front of Ame’s desk with twinkling eyes.

“Didn’t you say you were trying to get the confirmation for the studio visit with Miss Robynn? You should get back to that, while I get ready for the next stream!”

Silence fell between the two roommates, hanging heavily in the air. It almost felt suffocating to Angel. He felt sick to his stomach. Trying to confide in his dear friend, only to backpedal, and not take himself seriously… he felt like such a joke.

…

I hope Ame isn’t upset because of me.

---

Sitting down in his room, Angel’s brows furrowed. Everything he needed to start the stream laid in front of him, the clothes, the makeup, the tweeter account for K-Angel. His eyes fell on Tweeter, the cacophony of voices and anons, swirling in hatred and vitriol, all aimed towards one person.

Him.

He didn’t understand, how could people be so hateful and cruel? He was the internet’s angel, yes, but he was still a person. His heart ached. Reaching over, he grabbed the pieces for his K-Angel persona. Even if he didn’t want to stream today, K-Angel would be streaming for all their adoring fans. And he couldn’t leave them hanging, no.

Pulling his computer close to his chest, he opened up his tweeter for K-Angel, tapping his fingers against his lips in deep thought. Eventually, once they had the budget and resources to do so, he'd turn over the tweeter account to a marketing professional. It should have made things easier for him, yet... He shook his head with a frown.

"Hey, cuties! It's your favorite angel! I'll be streaming shortly! I hope to see you there! ♥︎"

It didn't take long for the vitriol and venom to roll in.

Running his hands through his hair, he laughed hollowly. Closing his eyes, he mumbled. His eyes began to water, yet he bite his tounge. He could handle a little hate. He had to. Looking up at his computer, watery eyes fell onto the packet of Embian by his laptop's side. Hmm... Well, there's nothing a little embian couldn't fix, right?

Picking up the packet of Embian, he paused. His fingers twitched, he glanced at the chat with Ame. Maybe... just maybe he could try to reach out again...

...

Hah. He wished he could. Popping the Embian, he threw his head back, giggling with a smile. Rolling his neck, cocking it to the side, he cleared his throat.

"Hey, cuties!"

Smiling, he waved to the audience. Fake. All of it.

They despised him, and he despised them. They were nothing more than goddamned cowards. They only knew how to drag others down, they were only capable of causing harm, because their lives held such little meaning outside their own existence.

The instantaneous hate comments proved his point.

"Why would you say something like that... Seriously... What the hell is your problem?" Sneering, Angel rubbed his face in frustration. They were always like this, hating and bitching for no other reason than to do so. "Don't you see that I'm over here, busting my ass trying to stream every day? You goddamned cowards."

Rage bubbled in his voice, slight agony behind each word. Squeezing his arms tightly, he couldn't help it. His body ached from hours alone, just his thoughts and razor blade. Cutting deeper than any words could. Slicing deeper than any memory was capable of doing. Hatred welled up from deep within his chest, his hands trembling.

"All you know is how to drag others down with you, like leeches, like parasites. To be honest... I'm sick of it. I mean, how empty is your life, that you have to bully someone online like a cracker barrel crackhead harassing the waitress?"

Gritting his teeth, his eyes fell on the chat. A slew of comments, friendly and not, flooded the chat. However... one commenter caught his eye.

rain_candy >> ... Angel ?

... He felt like he was going to be sick. His throat burned as he clasped his hands over his mouth. Gagging, he tried to suppress the rising bile in his throat to no avail.

...

The stream cut out before anyone could make much sense of the transpiring events. His palms trembled, covered in the sins of his own anger. He felt ill. Shaking, he grimaced as he looked at himself in the glare of the monitor. It was all over him. He felt gross. There was only fluid, thankfully, but he didn't feel very comforted.

Tears welled up in his eyes, hands trembling in panic. He barely recognized himself.

"Oh my god, Angel- Holy shit, you look terrible-"

Grimacing at the voice coming from behind him, he coughed. Everything burned. He felt so stupid. Groaning, he whined as Ame lifted a towel to his mouth, gently patting away the vomit from his face.

"Ough... it's everywhere... Gross... Let me get you new clothes so we can wash those as soon as possible."

... he felt a bit of a fool. Yet, he couldn't help but lean into the gentle and caring touch. The soft hands, the towel, the love and care and attention. He probably looked extremely pathetic, shaking and in tears. He felt so riled up... and he couldn't justify any of it.

"... Sorry..."

Tugging the vomit-covered clothes off his person, Ame grimaced as she scooped them into the towel. Sighing, she pointed towards the shower. She didn't have to say anything, he already knew. He felt too ill to not take one.

Fumbling out of the chair, he stumbled out of the streaming room. There was so much happening in such a short time. He felt like everything was falling apart. It was so painful. Why was he such a mess? He couldn't even take care of himself. He felt so guilty.

---

Sometimes, it takes a little more than a good night's rest and care from a dear friend to get better. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she ran her hand along the back of the sleeping streamer's neck. Dragging her nails lightly through his hair, her eyes fell on his phone. Constantly flashing, constantly buzzing. Tweeter occupied his home screen like it was a virus. Shifting onto her knees, Ame scooped up the buzzing phone. Disgust, hatred, and vitriol filled his home screen. Did they even sleep?

Shaking her head, she shifted back onto the side of the bed. Grabbing his hand gently, she pressed his thumb against the home button. Unlocking the phone, she entered Tweeter, she grimaced in pain. A feed filled to the brim with hatred... no wonder he fell so violently ill.

...

"Ame... Ame..."

Leaning against the doorway, Angel whined softly. Stumbling into Ame's office, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind. Nuzzling his face into her neck, he whined again.

"Ame... Ame, I'm hungry..."

"Make yourself something to eat then."

Mumbling softly, Ame reached up, gently placing her hand on his head. Earning another whine from the boy, she shook her head. Tightly gripping onto her, Angel huffed again.

"Nuh-uh. It's your turn to cook, I have to get ready for tonight's stream, duh."

The stream... Her brows furrowed in frustration as she thought about it. He had made himself sick because he felt the need to stream and puked on camera as a result. It was painfully clear he was destroying himself for something that didn't seem to be worth it anymore. Having fun wasn't worth it if it was inflicting pain.

"... Maybe you shouldn't. At least, not right now... I mean, just looking at my tweeter timeline and /st/... I think you need to take a break."

"... I can't do that. We have no other source of revenue. And, if I can't handle a little bit of hate, what good am I? I'm fine! It's fine. We're..."

Nausea hit his chest like tidal waves as his eyes fell on the open tweeter feed on his roommate's phone.

>> I WILL PROTECC KANGEL >> I love kangel, and I love seeing cute girls puke, so I'm happy! >> ive always hated kangel lmaaaooo

Gagging, he let go of Ame, stumbling backward. Clasping his hands over his mouth, bile rose from his throat. Running out of the room, Ame could hear Angel emptying out his already empty stomach. Sighing, she stood up, following him out of the room. Kneeling down by his side, she gently rubbed his back. Groaning, Angel slumped over on his side, laying his head on Ame's lap. Tears welled up in his eyes as he choked back a sob. He felt like shit. Someone. Anyone.

Save me.

...

"Maybe if I just try and stream like normal, maybe no one will really care! I mean, internet phenomena pass really quickly. In a week's time, I'm sure only internet freaks will remember, and it says more about them than it does me."

Laughing weakly, he tugged on the edge of his collar. His usual outfit was still drying from the events of last night, so wearing that was out of the question. Thankfully, K-Angel has many alternative outfits he could wear. His chest still ached, his throat burned in protest, his eyes watered slightly, but he couldn't let that stop him. Ame didn't have a job, and for now, this was their only source of income.

Laying his head in his hands, he tried to ignore the constant clicks and dings on his computer. Texts, DMs, posts, notifications, screen after screen after screen, god, why wouldn't they be silent? Groaning, he mumbled to himself. He knew, sure, if this didn't work out in the end, he could always fall back on his parents and sister. Sure, it wasn't the most ideal situation for him, one of his fathers was wholly absent, always at work, always off at some bar, always with someone else. His sister was okay, sure. A little mischievous, sure, and always a bit off-kilter (something about a thing named Aha?) but she was far from the worst. And his other father... he didn't want to think about it. But, at least he had somewhere to fall back. Ame didn't.

He hated to think about it like this. But, for Ame, he was all she had. He was all she had left, and he was the person she entrusted with his safety. She had no family, no safe spaces to go, and her memory seemed to short-circuit more and more often. If he wasn't careful, there was a chance she'd leave, and never be seen again. That thought scared him. He couldn't help it, he felt... oddly drawn to her. He wanted to be able to give her a good life, it's why he got into streaming in the first place. If he could make it big, he could always care for her and himself. And he'd never have to rely on anyone else, ever again.

But the internet is a place he despised. Even while being at its mercy. He hoped it exploded someday.

...

"Heya, cuties! It's me, your darling internet angel! Here for you through thick and thin ♥︎"

He was usually good at faking it, just enough to get through to the ending of a stream. He'd done it for 19 years on end, just enough faking to get by. Be a functional member of society, be kind, polite, and courteous. Societal norms...

Those only apply to misfits, don't they? And misfits can't win with normies. Ever.

He could feel his stomach churning again. At least this time, Ame made him take a bucket wherever he went.

"Let's get onto today's topic! Which is... corned beef!"

He's never actually had corned beef before. He didn't know why in particular this was what he decided to talk about. Ame has some in the fridge... maybe he should ask Ame if he can try some.

... If there was any more left by the time he remembered to ask.

"Corned beef is quite odd, right? It can come in a plastic package, or in a can...! But it's still the same thing... and another thing, it's actually called brisket in some stores. I mean, who was in charge of marketing there?"

Shaking his head, he placed a hand on his chin. "Brisket, the version of corned beef that comes in plastic packages rather than cans, comes in many shapes and forms! Sometimes, it's thinly cut" - he could see the hate comments flooding in, seriously, his puke? Talk about beating a dead horse - "or a thicker cut, and the quality, it's just never consistent! I mean, come on" - more comments, begging him to puke, to ruin himself all over again. Hah. He wouldn't give them the chance - "And the canned stuff? Looks like a cold corpse, bread's dead cousin! And corned beef hash? What even is that! No, like, seriously, what is it supposed to be used for?" These comments were getting on his fucking nerves. Seriously. Get a grip, commentators.

"... Never mind, I don't want to talk about it anymore. Let's talk about something else!" Pointing at the camera, he sneered. "Hey, hey commentator "puke-a-cola", I have a question for you! Do you know what's more confusing than corned beef?" Tilting his head, he relished in their panic. Online trolls are never prepared for a personal callout. "Hey, hey commentator "karma-wheel", do you know the answer? Or, or, "weed-killer"? Come on, don't any of you have the answer? Or, are all your brains filled with puuukeee? Gross, squishy, there's so little in there."

>> Ugh, attacking your fans? Talk about pathetic lol

Furrowing his brows in frustration, he scoffed.

"If I'm sooo pathetic, then, stop watching, crackhouse cockguzzlers! Close the damn stream! Or are you sooo obsessed with me, trying to gain a glimpse of me puking?! Perverts!"

Gripping his fist, his teeth sank into the skin of his thumb. Grumbling to himself in frustration, he laughed bitterly. The comments kept rolling in, one atop another. Shocked, offended, hateful, concerned, all sorts of comments rolled in. His stomach stirred, a wave of disgust and hatred boiling within himself. He hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them-

"I mean, what are you? A sadist? Oh, I bet you reallllyyyyy love to see others suffer! You just get off to their sobs, their pain, and SUFFERING. You disgust me, you're sick, you're sick, you're sick!"

He couldn't hold it back any longer. Any more and they'd get exactly what they'd want. He can't control his body, but he'll be damned if they get it.

...

The stream ended abruptly. She could hear him in the background, wrenching, puking his guts out. She felt bad for him, she wanted to help him, she really did. But...

He didn't want help. He was always too proud to accept it.

Sighing, Ame pondered. Does she want to go over, and see how he's faring? He was pretty angry with those commentators... she didn't want him to be angry with her too. Mumbling to herself, she curled up in her wheely chair, she pulled out her phone. Leaning on her fist, Ame couldn't help but mindlessly scroll.

If he wants my help... he'll come to me.

Scrolling through Tweeter, Ame paused a moment. Sitting up in her chair, she narrowed her eyes in worry.

>> His real name is Satoru, apparently. >> wait? Like, the sorcerer? No way! >> I heard he's also a shut-in who always skips out on school! >> and his moderator? I heard he's trapped her in their relationship, she's got no way out even if she wanted.

That... isn't good. No wonder he was so sick as of late.

... she didn't know if she should tell him or not. That might cause a spiral. Well, if he finds out on his own... either option isn't quite ideal.

---

"Urgh..."

Why were there so many eyes everywhere? Watching him, staring at him, waiting for him. Watching, observing, staring, witnessing... Was he even safe in his own home anymore? The scratching on the floor, the taps on the window, the nails on the wood... make it stop. Please. Someone. Anyone.

Running his hands through his hair, he grimaced, hissing in pain. The endless ping-ing from his laptop felt like a dawning, bellowing, shaking the room like a giant slamming its hands into the ground. Shaking an already unstable structure. Was everything falling around him? He felt so scared.

>> a metube with no angel... >> angels don't really exist... >> You won't believe why the famous streamer "OMGkawaiiangel" is being flamed online! >> Apparently people found out K-Angel's identity! And he's the son of a famous sorcerer! Who would have known? The plot thickens!

Stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT-

Gripping his hair in panic, a weak sob escaped his throat. Tears welled up in his eyes, a painful feeling filling up his chest. The doorbell - [ ding! ding! ding! ] - oh please, not the doorbell. Ringing in his ears, ringing, ringing, ringing, and ringing. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts so much. It's a burning, raw sensation, knawing at his skin. - [ ding! ding! ding! ] - It tears at his skin, a sickening sensation, painful and gruesome. And the tapping on the window - [ tap! tap! tap! ] - god god make it stop. Leave me alone LEAVE ME ALONE - [ tap! tap! tap! ] - please please PLEASE.

"... Angel?"

The eyes, in the corners of the room, from the windows, from the computer. They're all there, staring at him, watching him. Never looking away, never blinking, always watching. Aggressive, knawing dread. Tearing him apart, bit by bit, piece by piece. A dissection, all for your entertainment !

"Angel??"

Please. Please, god. If there even was a god out there. Please. His hands gripped the bloody box cutter tighter. ... when did he get a hold of that? Everything was blending together. His wrists hurt. His skin burned. Maybe it would help him feel better. It didn't. He was desperate to feel something. Anything.

"Angel? Where did you go...?"

Were they already inside? God, no, please. Anything but invading his personal space. Ugh, there really is no end to them, like gross little maggots, writhing inside his internet-ridden corpse... the visual made him feel a little sick. I can hear their footsteps outside. His eyes fell on the bloody box cutter. Sharp and small. He could rule it as self-defense, they stepped into his property. This would be their fault. They deserved every scar. They both did.

"Angel-! Angel!"

...

Blood dripped from a small, thin gash on her cheek. A crimson-red liquid welled up and overflowed, staining rosy cheeks in foul blood. Tears pricked the edges of her eyes, a tight feeling rising in her chest. The box cutter lay only an inch away from her face, gripped in his shaking hand, thick and viscous blood dripping silently from the tip of his blade and the wounds from his arm... and onto the ground.

Die. You don't deserve to be in this world, in my world. Get out, get OUT.

Die. Stop screaming, stop crying. It's so grating, so painful. This is your fault. You came to my house, through my door, into my room to torment me. This is your fault.

Die. Stop struggling. You asked for this! Watching me so closely, never turning your gaze to anyone or anything else. Didn't you want this? My attention? My gaze? I'm giving it allllll to you! Cut by cut. slice by slice. Vessel by vessel. Craving out a personal autograph, just for you ♥︎

Squelch ♥︎ Squelch ♥︎ ! Squishy ♥︎ Squish ♥︎ ! Tearing. Dismantling. Dissecting. Dying ♥︎ Dying. Dying. And then...

... pure silence. All pure silence now, not a sound in earshot. No eyes in sight. No tapping on the windows. No people at the door. Just, pure and uninterrupted bliss. Was this heaven? At that moment, all he could hear was the sound of Ame's blood, soaking the bedroom floor.

Kill me.

---

"I didn't know how to care for a guppy fish. So, I did a lot of research! But it died really quickly anyway. I don't even remember its name. I wish I was like that guppy."

His words no longer seemed to be making much of any sense. As of late... it was like he was lost in his own mind. I was so worried he'd do something drastic. That he'd harm himself, that he'd do something that he could never come back from, that he'd be unretrievable from his own mind.

"Heya, cuties! I have some unfortunate news today before the stream starts!"

He held a small portrait in his arms. Blood soaked the inner frame, and a small, frail-looking girl rested inside, behind the glass. She was a small, petite girl, with deep purple hair, soft purple eyes, snow like freckles.

"My one and only moderator left me! I don't know where she went... But, my withered pride won't take me until I'm satisfied ♥︎ So, streams will be planned and moderated by yours truly until I can find someone to cover ♥︎ meaning... well, there might be a couple delays in the foreseeable future... so, stay by my side, cuties ♥︎ As I guide you to the light."

There was a smile on his face, a soft grin matched with empty eyes. The light that shone in them has long since faded. But, he felt nothing, but pure ecstasy. Like he was floating upon some imaginary clouds, far above where anything could reach him. This was true, unadulterated bliss.

"You know, bad people are often referred to as "demons", right? You know, "so-and-so is a DEMON lol" and whatnot? But, is that really true?"

"Demons only killed like... 10 people tops. Meanwhile... God killed like 2 million! That's a lot more than any demon has ever done!"

"Soo... if someone does something reaaaally bad... doesn't it make more sense to call them God?"

.....

Jrypbzr gb gur Vagrearg Natry'f Fgernz!

Abj, fur vf gehyl unccl.

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ENDING ?? - INTERNET OVERDOSE ♥︎

>> Try Again? > Yes!! > No!!

[zillanovikov]

writing a book is hard

getting anyone to read the book you've written is so much harder

to the point that I sometimes fantasize about paying people to read my work

the reason I don't do that: in a capitalist system, people don't value things unless they pay for them. no one would take my book seriously.

i wrote a short story about this and then rysz actually read my work and wrote a response short story and then dale did too and somehow this spiraled out of control to make this anthology with a demon's butt on the cover

if you would like to show your appreciation for this book in a capitalist system, we're selling book boxes with SWAG and also with THE BOOK and you can TOTALLY READ IT and i will be eternally grateful, buy it here, any proceeds with go to Médecins Sans Frontières because really and truly we just want the readers but also I love making book boxes because I'm a craft-nerd and selling them lets me make them

if you prefer free things, sign up here for an electronic review copy but please still value it and read it? I believe that your heart is stronger than capitalist value systems