#if you're a terf unfollow me now

[sureuncertainty]

at least now i've gone through an important tumblr rite of passage, watching a longtime mutual become a radfem :/

[teaandinanity]

Man sometimes you see something on your dash and you're like 'ah okay there will be a response somewhere' but no. No they actually think this is a good take and now you have to unfollow about it.

[creatingblackcharacters]

Do you have any advice/suggestions/requests for non-black members of fandom as far as how to respond to racism in fandom spaces? Obviously we shouldn't be speaking over black voices, but it doesn't seem fair for black members of fandom to have to do all the work of making a fandom space safe and welcoming for themselves.

You are correct! Tbh, these are tips for being a good ally in general:

Amplify Black Voices!

Odds are, whatever manifesto you have in your mind about the injustice of antiblackness in your fandom, a Black fan has already said it multiple times. While I appreciate the sentiment, I must admit I'm salty when I see that people are more supportive of (usually white) voices that discuss my lived experience, over my own voice and my lived experience. What does that really solve? You need to be following Black fans too, that way you're actually in the know when these things are happening.

Don't be a Bystander!

If I'm getting jumped and you (who had the power to help) show up afterwards to say "I really empathized with your pain", I'm not going to think "wow they cared, I'm so grateful". I'm going to think "WOW they really let me get my ass beat!" Same idea with this. That's honestly the most painful part for me; it's not the lone racist themselves, but the hordes of people who back them up, and the rest (some of whom you may even consider a friend) who might disagree but say absolutely nothing.

When you see that a Black peer is being railroaded and you KNOW it's wrong, step tf up! Be willing to say "you're out of pocket for behaving this way, and I will not be supporting you now that I know you're a racist". I will never know you're an ally if you're only an ally in your head! It's the thought that counts, but the action that delivers!!

It's going to be uncomfortable! Stand on it!

If you share that you're against antiblackness in fandom spaces, but next you're reblogging whitewashed art, or an artist known for whitewashed/racist pieces, or still following someone who's made covert/overt antiblack statements, etc. just bc you "enjoy their stuff"... You're not being an ally. Be willing to hold those creators accountable, and when they disappoint you, unfollow them. Be willing to tell your friends, "hey, that person did/said this thing that was anti-black and were unapologetic about it". And if your friends don't care? Now you know who's around you. I'm not saying it's easy, but... Do you stand on business, or would you rather allow racism so that you can stay comfortable? Because your Black peers have to live under this discomfort you're only momentarily experiencing. It's far harder for me to approach these people and hold them accountable. And if I see that you're still kicking it with known antiblack racists... I'm probably not going to assume highly of you, either.

Educate yourself on what these aggressions look like!

You might not know what to look for, and if you don't, you're gonna miss a lot. What is actually antiblackness will often be posited as "drama" or "fandom wank". Or, if they're really trying to sound progressive, it'll reveal itself as dogwhistles in other important topics like queer representation or misogyny (e.g. how white women often claim misogyny when confronted with their racism, or TERFs). That's how it gets swept under the rug. Learn to recognize microaggressions, learn to recognize the signs. It requires work! Listen to and believe your Black peers when they explain what they saw! Bc trust, once you see it... You'll realize there's a lot of it lmao. And that's what many fans are afraid of confronting.

That's what I have for now, if anyone else has anything to offer. 👍🏾 Thanks for asking!

[bolszaja-miedwedica]

NEW ABOUT ME:

-I'm genderfluid and audhd, borderline too (undiagnosed because the system sucks) and diagnosed schizophrenic

-godspoused! if you're anti fuck off

-I'm an age regressor but i curse a lot on this blog so age regressors feel free to follow my agere side blog @there-are-sharks-in-my-milk

-i don't discriminate anyone this is a safe space for minorities, poc, microlabels, systems, lgbt people, therians, everyone who is not a hateful jerk

-this blog is a mix of me posting about my deities, stray kids and other stuff i find interesting

-sometimes i vent make sure you're okay with it

blog rules are:

-if my practice looks different than yours and you don't like it you're free to unfollow

-if my vents annoy you and you feel the urge to tell me its my fault you're free to unfollow this is my shadow work free from censor space

-if you feel the need to tell me i seem psychotic you're free to fuck off

-don't fuckin curse me??? some of yall are not behaving and it's pissing me off

-other than that be kind and respectful to me and my friends

to interact with my blog make sure that you aren't:

racist, homophobic, terf, pedo, ableist, anti agere, a nsfw blog (it makes me uncomfortable), generally a hateful human

now the best part:

worshipping:

-Sekhmet

-Holy Mary

-Baba Jaga

-Medusa

-Kali

-Lilith

working with:

Marzanna, Apollo, Dionysus, Hecate, Persephone, Asclepius, Hel, Anat, Death, Satan, Leszy, Cernunnos, Horned God, Helios, Venus, Freyja, Asmodeus, Baphomet archangel Jophiel, Thoth, Fenrir, Dantalion, Buer, Beelzebub, Mut, Bes, Bacchus, Kogkipr (an unknown deity), Proserpina, Cnabetius Mars, Tegid Foel, angel Sariel, Hermanubis, Amun, Deimos and Phobos, Kvasir, Wepwawet, The Dagda, Swarożyc, Lucifer, Begotho (unknown deity), Aphrodite Areia, Stracchus (unknown deity), Ruadan, Somnia, Kek, Cerberus, Hestia, Nyx, Cerridwen, the Morrigan, Parvati, Shiva, Krishna, Vishnu, RadhaRani, Lakshmi, archangel Gabriel, archangel Azrael, Nakir and Munkar, archangel Michael, archangel Israphil, Kiram and Katibun, Somnus, Loki, Mokosz, Allah, Brigid, Hermes, Shakti, Anubis, Weles, Baldur, Khnum, Poseidon, Amphitrite, Astaroth, Neith, Wenut, Ganesha, Perun, Khepri, Inanna, Dola/Niedola, Ariadne, Jaryło, Chors, Sleipnir, Zorza, Jormungandr, Odin, Czarnobóg, Blodeuwedd, Set, Mafdet, Idunn, Seshat, Dziewanna, Artemis, Arioch, Eros, Vesna, Selene, Luna, Leviathan, Behemoth, Nox, Mammon, Abaddon, Azazel, Kathos, Vesta, Sun, Moon, Minerva, Athena, Eosphorus, Stolas

spirits that i work with:

-Pahiri (a white dragon spirit)

-Nkfofa (the mermaid spirit guide)

-a fae

-Fienon (a rusałka)

-Mo Xasii (familiar nr 1)

-Hilkog (spirit guide)

-Kalina (a harpy)

-Zanota (a mermaid spirit guide nr 2)

-Gawoż (hydra, familiar nr 2)

- Kiityk (upiór spirit guide)

-Xyo (a red fire dragon)

-Bemamo (a dragon shark)

devoting to:

-King Hades

-Bastet

-Aphrodite

I'm not really a hellenic polytheist, nor a kemetic one, not really a slavic one as well although i am hyperfixated on slavic paganism, yes, and i do wanna work with more slavic deities in the future but I don't label myself as anything I'm just a witch and a pagan i celebrate the slavic holidays and my deities holidays because they're the closest to me. if i were to label myself i would use "rodzimowierca"? but I'm just a witch, and well apparently a medium now too so 😀 fun uhh

i do free readings too! 5 a day to not burn out so quick but i wanna get more skilled since divination is my favourite skill to get one just dm me tp ask if im open!

I'm planning to master:

-cartomancy

-herbology

-moon magic

-blood magic

-protection

-palmistry

-a crystal ball

-reading more books...

-my fuckin research motivation...

i can do:

-tarot

-clairvoyance

-clairaudience

-spells and shit

-rituals

-sigils

-tea blends i guess

-motanki

-scrying

-oracle

-runes (both nordic and witch's runes)

sława! :]

[anarchotahdigism]

I will unfollow/mute/block/otherwise ignore people who use ableist or saneist terms about others and those who mock, joke about, or otherwise minimize the severity of COVID. Thousands of people like me are dying a week because of ableism driving the pandemic and I have zero fucking tolerance for it. If you're in any way complicit with the fascist Big Lie of "back to normal," I'm probably gonna block you. Wear a fucking mask the entire time you're in public and give up COVID-spreading activities because your personal pleasure does not trump the need for communal safety and fighting the eugenics and fascism that has been normalized through mandated COVID spread. It's not lost on me how many so-called radicals and leftists are openly accepting of the eugenics of ableism as they claim to oppose the various mechanisms of genocide. If you're still using things like "crazy," "stupid," "dumb," "insane," or other ableist terms to describe other people or things, do better. Fix your heart and your vocabulary.

I've been in complete isolation for going on 5 years now due to COVID and the fall of society into completely open, unabashed, unmitigated, unashamed eugenics. I'm an elder millenial Persian anarchist in so-called PNW who posts about how fucked it is that people still reproduce systems of harm while ostensibly fighting oppression. I'm significantly disabled, heavily traumatized, food insecure, medically neglected, queer as hell, AuDHD. Sometimes I post about media from this lens, mostly I feel like I'm screaming. From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free None of us is free til we're all free Jin, jiyan, azadi Wear a mask TERFs, SWERFs, Tankies, Zionists, Radlibs can all be composted If you want to help me survive, v/m/o is mordantivore

[akajustmerry]

i'm sorry you're getting rude asks in your inbox, but at risk of being another rude ask- fair or unfair, you understand that many people have been called zionists because they shared misinformation with good intentions or tried to clear up misconceptions even if it fit the wrong narrative? or they made a mistake with wording? there's a lot of jewish bloggers i know who have been pro-palestine since the start and were quickly called zionists anyway because they misspoke at some point. there were self-proclaimed antizionists, some indigenousto to other regions, on a zionist blocklkst spread around on here. one of my swana mutuals was called a zionist for making a similar post to yours, sobthis reminded me of that. I'm not trying to cheapen the word "zionist" in your inbox or anything, but I think it's been cheapened and/or misdefined for a while now. it doesnt just mean "bad person". you're easily one off the most pro-palestinian non-palestinian posters on this site, always sharing timely information, and you still got called one. I just think there's something wrong with that and it isn't right. I feel dumb saying "words have meanings" , but they do. for ex., it's kind of like calling every transmisogynist a terf when they're not even a feminist. we all want the same things so we shouldn't lose the plot. felt like that needed to be said and hopefully your inbox gets less weird.

yes absolutely! thank u for saying :) I understand where my mistake was, why it was harmful, and apologise sincerely. people have every right to be upset so I'm not making excuses, and folks have every right to unfollow me. when it comes to genocide, spreading misinformation however it was intended means life or death and I won't be making that mistake again. in the meantime, I'll keep trying to help as much as I can and be more considerate.

[hussyknee]

do u really not see the difference btwn writing fanfic on the internet and buying a game whose storyline is actively being written by white supremacists and having the money go directly into the pocket of the most vocal & influential terf in the UK? that's not even touching all of the other racist and offensive bs in her series inc her antisemitism, appropriating first nations cultures, her asian racism, etc? i guess thats why you dont have 'antisemitics dni' on your blog

First, let me be clear – I do not give one single shit about Harry Potter. They are the best memories of my extremely shitty adolescence, I still read fanfic from time to time, but other than that, if I never hear the word "Harry Potter" again it will be too soon. I care about the fact that you clowns are

encouraging bullies and endangering mentally ill marginalized fans

leeching the air from leftist and queer discourse

fuelling a Western culture war that distracts from combating systemic transphobia

making suffering Black and brown communities, who mostly see white and Western trans people, think that trans people don't have any real problems beyond video games

Now, on to your ask:

I said never said not buying the game was the same as writing fanfic on the internet. I said that the furor over buying the game is leading to everyone who had anything to do with Harry Potter, including just writing fanfic, being bullied. I've had to unfollow so many people for reblogging posts attacking people for being in the *fandom*.

Asking people to refrain from doing something to prove that they care, especially demanding that they don't, has never in the history of activism worked. Black people have been speaking out against copaganda shows forever and STILL get harrassed. Indigenous people have been asking people to boycott Avatar and gotten nothing. Some people comply, but more do the thing simply out of contrarianism, and the entire issue becomes a culture war divided along political affiliation. People on the right go out of their way to do the thing, the people on the center and center-left won't really care, and people who identify as leftist divorce themselves even more from the rest of the left as being no better than the right, which eventually devastating results when it comes to actual elections and agitating for political change.

What works a lot better is harm reduction. Pirating is harm reduction, asking the HP fandom to offset JKR's fuckery by making their own merch, promoting indie games and donating to trans healthcare funds is harm reduction. People won't stand for being policed, but they like giving and also not paying for stuff with a clear conscience. You would have raised so much fucking money and promoted so many different things in all this time you've spent giving the game negative engagement clicks and keeping it trending on social media so long after its release.

You keep insisting that people shouldn't be fans because JKR equals her fandom with her own influence. This is called buying into the right-wing narrative. The woman is delusional (I can't think of a non-ableist word atm, and I honestly think that she's not all stable) and you're enabling her and her terf cult. We created the online HP fandom ourselves back in the aughts, before there was any merch, before movie rights were ever sold to WB, a full decade before her advertising machine ever woke up to the fact that an internet fandom existed. JKR has lost relevance for HP fans a long time ago; imagine the slap in the face for her if the fandom starts countering her bigotry by very prominently engaging in trans activism? The JKR terf cult in the HP fandom are a minority, like TERFs themselves (they're only so loud because the right-wing promotes the shit out of them). The vast majority of fans are just the kind of vaguely well-meaning cis people who don't agree with transphobes but are pretty ignorant about trans issues. And I do mean the vast majority, because literally a billion people grew up on her books and only a bare fraction is on social media at all, and even fewer even see the leftist drive to boycott the franchise.

Let's talk demographics. Because of the aforementioned vastness of consumers, the majority of HP fans are cis het, abled, neurotypical Millennials. Because of the way internet penetration works, the majority of HP fans online and even in fandom are white or Western. Leftist spaces mostly attract young and marginalized people, and transformative fandom is full of neurodivergent women and queer people. Which means the majority of people you're reaching are young queer neurodivergent people who have limited economic power themselves. And the people most vulnerable to and impacted by policing and harrassment are trans, Black and brown, Jewish, mentally ill, poor. Do you see the problem? You're policing the very bottom rungs of the socio-economic ladder on the off-chance of maybe influencing a privileged few who might give a damn.

This is literally why we say that boycotts, especially over social media, don't fucking work. Firstly because they penalize the most disenfranchised consumers, it's hard to reach enough people to even explain why they matter, it's hard to keep up with the constant discourse and changing information, and it relies entirely on performance. Someone can stay quiet or nod along furiously to whatever you're saying and then just...go out and buy the thing. Social censure doesn't work when you have the option of not having to face the consequences. Contrary to hellsite opinion, the Fantastic Beasts franchise died because it sucked, and Harry Potter is dying because it's fading from relevance and JKR is being an embarrassment. The wider market doesn't even know y'all exist.

As for the game being racist and antisemitic...you come on my blog, a South Asian who has been in fandom for twenty years, and try to tell me about racism in media???? NINETY-NINE PERCENT OF ALL MEDIA IS RACIST AND ANTISEMITIC YOU ABSOLUTE CLOWN. I'm from South Asia, our children grow up on books written by colonizers! LORD OF THE RINGS is white supremacy! NARNIA is white supremacy! Disney and Marvel is one of the biggest figures in US military industrial complex that razed the Middle East to the ground. It's so ubiquitous that we have to accept the racism and white supremacy as a matter of course to engage with any Western media! And even then fandom is so racist it's hard to even exist in it! We get run out of it when we try to talk about it. You suck on white supremacy every single day you live like it's your Mum's teat! Do you know what it's like to hear whiteys ranting that people who consume this one game they hate are being antisemitic and racist??? While still fawning??? Over cop shows???? And Disney???? And sending Black people??? Death threats??? Over a game???

I don't say "anti-Semites DNI" for the same reason I don't say "racists DNI". Nobody identifies as a racist or antisemite, that's not how systemic oppression works. Radfem and Zionist and Communist are political identities. Radical feminism is underpinned by transphobia and racism, Zionism is currently entrenched in Palestine occupation, Western communists refuse to acknowledge USSR and Global South genocides. See how that works?

Bitch, you didn't just come at me about JKR's indigenous cultural appropriation when I was among the few who were trying to discourage people from supporting Fantastic Beasts back in 2016 and literally got flamed for it. You people did not give a single shit about Natives back then, and you don't give one now. Just like you don't actually care about Jews and never did. I literally never heard about why and how openly alt-right people keep getting this kind of power and position in the gaming industry. Conversations about antisemitism in gaming and antisemitic tropes in entertainment haven't gotten this much traction. No wider revelations about how entertainment media directly funding and promoting social harms. But sure, it's about antisemitism and racism and has absolutely nothing to do with a mess of white queers realizing they can weaponize it like a cudgel against anyone they believe are against them. We know you whites. You care about excuses to take the moral high ground without having to do any self-interrogation or cost to yourself.

Finally, to give y'all one example of where the current discourse around this stupid shit is at:

Fuck you.

[weebsinstash]

someone was trying to doxx you recently, something about you being in a relationship with a terf. are you a terf?

No, for starters I'm not in a relationship with anyone at all, and actually the entire reason they even made that comment was because they were essentially DMing me directly, telling me 1v1 that I was ugly and unlovable and that a specific person would never love me, I'm gross and ugly, so on so forth, so to kind of try and take the wind out of their sails, I said "that's fine because they turned out to be a terf" you know, implying that they shouldn't be weaponizing shit against me that I essentially no longer care about, basically wasting everyone's time and all, kind of just trying to get them to stopnby basically trying to tell them there was no point trying to like snub me at least with that particular topic

Cue them running into every askbox imaginable telling anyone who can listen that I'm some kind of transphobic monster when I said literally the exact opposite, literally the exact opposite, and is another reason I feel the need to clarify at all is because I saw some people actually answer those asks like "oh I didn't know weeb was a terf, unfollowed, thank you" like in the nicest way possible some of you guys are sent messages anonymously without knowing the source or the intention behind it and immediately believe 100% what you're told and that's not a great habit to have online kwim

The entire thing was just, well, it's messy and nuanced but, it was essentially a verbal disagreement that turned into lost tempers which turned into months of harassment and the matter has actually been peacefully resolved and is now over. I kind of just want to move on from this since, it wasn't exactly a pleasant experience for me and for a lot of the people who for some reason got harassed as well, it was starting to escalate and get really scary and I kind of just hope it's not long before everyone forgets this all happened 😓

[gothhabiba]

I think as someone who has followed you for a very long time (pre 2016) other anon will forgive me for saying that you have had open and long mutual interactions with trans women on this website the entire time I've followed you. I recently found an old post you wrote about trans women's right to determine how, what, and to whom to label genitals when "penis repulsion" was the special flavor of terf panic over lesbians dating trans women. I know you would never wave around what you've been doing as an answer to these people because it wouldn't change any missteps you actually made.

It's quite a lot to me that anyone actually could have followed you during that era and believe anything but that you were a little too credulous of butchcommunist's excuses when she started to get called out. Early on, she had trans feminine mutuals who also stood by her. You're certainly not being more supportive or writing completely new content about fighting transmisogyny to cover your tracks. You have been this way for as long as I have followed you. Feel free not to publish this if it seems too defensive, but I think some people's memories are shorter or more muddled than mine.

you're right that I'm wary of appearing to be 'doing PR'—people who are upset with me about this are perfectly within their rights to be upset, and if I can set anyone's mind at ease by clarifying that I believe that to be the case and informing my current followers who may not have been around at the time of what happened with this a few years back, then I'm happy to do that.

the post and the time that you're talking about were around the same time that I first started to feel reservations about some of her posts (like referring to "gender nonconformance" when asked specifically about trans women; or saying that no one is ever obligated to have sex with anyone else, and then later saying that she never "said or implied" that she thought it was trans women who were pressuring cis lesbians to have sex with them, when, like, you kind of don't have to, that is obviously what people are going to assume).

I discussed these reservations with people in my personal life (this must have been 2017?) but basically came to the conclusion that I wasn't going to unfollow or block her yet because my stance on counter-recruiting is that, when it seems like things could go either way (like, someone is still vocally denying animus for trans women or support for policies that limit transition, but evidently flirting with terf ideology), it is the opposite of helpful to cut them off.

because for sure the people who are not going to cut them off.... are terfs..... and so now you've closed the possibility (however large or slim it might have been) of them reading what you write and reblog on the subject and changing their mind. and I believe that terfs know this, and play up the whole "genderists ostracise you just for asking innocent little questions" thing, and use this to drive recruitment. but maybe this is credulous of me.

I also believe that if someone is plainly a 'crypto'-terf to the extent that they are knowingly interacting with self-professed terfs (so, barely 'crypto' at that point) then it is too far gone for that, and the only thing you're doing by continuing to allow them to reblog from you is furthering the point of crypto-terfs in the first place (namely, to draw people in by degrees through 'legitimate,' 'respectable' engagement with left-wing people that gradually shades into more and more overtly terf circles—same as any other fascist or far-right ideology). so that's why I unfollowed when I did.

during 2018-2019 I was attending grad school, which required 16-17 hours of work from me every day, and so I wasn't online very much at all—if memory serves, the 'private terf chat' thing came out somewhere in the middle of this time, and I unfollowed when I was 'back' and able to investigate / catch up to what was going on.

people are welcome to disagree with my ideas about terf recruitment and potential strategies for counter-recruitment, which I am not even sure that I'm right about but am merely trying things out as I go. it makes total sense for people to guess that I saw the writing on the wall and to view this kind of thing as affiliation, and I sincerely am sorry to anyone who felt less safe, then or now, because of my actions.

the reason that I haven't talked in depth about this before is that, like, again, it seems like spin! lmao

[boreal-sea]

Hi I'm sorry if I'm bothering you idk where to go with this and i saw you post on anti t*rf cutting to the chase im a nonbinary afab person but during a spiral i got sucked down a t*rf rabbithole and some of the ideas are stuck in my head help me please i don't want to be one I don't know what to do

If you send me an Ask off anon, we can chat and I can message you if you want!

For now: Start reading books and blogs and watching videos by feminists who are explicitly pro-trans. Consume media made by trans feminists. Consume media that specifically counters the arguments made by terfs and radfems. Consume media by trans people in general, especially trans folks who openly state they are inclusive.

An excellent video series that rips apart TERFism from the inside out is here:

There are tons of awesome trans folks to follow on Tumblr.

There's my own transfeminism blog, @graytheory. There's also @transsexual-menace who has an excellent pinned post with resources. @queermasculine is a great blog about transmasculinity. @spacelazarwolf is just super cool and posts a lot about feminism and trans issues. @genderkoolaid is also fucking awesome.

Things to avoid: Any content by self-described "baeddels", "proud misandrists", "truscum", or content by people who call themselves "TIRFS". You want to avoid radical feminism in any form, because it is the root of TERFism and TERF ideology is based on radfem ideology. You also want to avoid any form of trans rhetoric that is exclusionary, claims there's only one right way to "be trans", etc.

I'd also say avoid anyone who claims trans men aren't oppressed, can't experience misogyny, or claims that trans men have "male privilege", because that's just watered down radical feminist with trans language slapped on top of it.

One thing that can help, if you use desktop, is downloading the extension Shinigami Eyes. Yes, it's controversial as hell, but when you're first getting out of radfem and terf circles, it'll help you identify terfs and radfems right away, and you'll be able to block them and unfollow them really quickly. I highly recommend it for anyone who's just learning to identify radfem rhetoric and anyone who is trying to avoid interacting with radfems and terfs entirely.

[pinkyjulien]

I assure you that asking me in DMs why I blocked you won't get you a satisfying answer ghfhgfh it's pretty boring and when it comes to the CP77 fandom, the reasons are pretty straight forward:

You have a Mitch ship (actual mental issue TM, can't control it, sorry etc) (Happens rarely now since his tag is blocked and filtered; some people still don't tag their post properly tho)

You posted character hate in the main tag (happens a lot with River for example)

You're too vocal on Kerry's bisexuality and posted it in the main tag (made a long post about it and why I think this whole drama is dumb)

You're a bigot / terf / racist etc

You've been an asshole to me and/or my friends (publicly or in private)

I don't know how Tumblr's block work when it comes to side blogs since apparently people can still contact me here

As a general statement:

No, you did not "do anything wrong" (when it comes to reasons 1/2/3) I'm just currating my space and what I see in the main tag; I browse it almost daily to check new stuff

No, you don't have to change anything in the way you post - blocking isn't anything to do with You or how you post, it's about Me and my space, continue to vibe as you always did and don't think you have to change to accommodate anyone's comfort - you're free to post whatever you want however you want, just as people are free to use the tools available (block, filter, unfollow) to curate their space

If you've been trying to interact and ask me questions on my posts while being blocked and feel ignored, you can ask in my sideblog's DMs; however, if I blocked you for reason 5 and you're somewhat not aware that you've been an ass, I'll be frank about it and either we talk it out or I ask you to not interact / potentially ignore you and block you with my side blog as well

And no, I don't hate you, especially if we never interacted directly, in DMs or in a server

Reminder that blocking is good for everyone's mental health, when you block content that upset you you're less prone to vague post etc etc people are less upset = less drama for everyone

That is all ✌

[spot-the-antisemitism]

(u don't need to publish this if it will cause drama lol) hmm i agree with spacelazarwolf on a lot of jewish topics but he has ALWAYS had a bit of a mra misandry believer vibe. it hasn't been enough for me to unfollow him because i think following people u disagree with a little is healthy but it is defo something i have noticed. and left mra's fave tactic is to accuse people of being terfs for having perfectly normal feminist views so i am unsurprised [think emoji]

Dear anon,

this is a drama blog now lmao but

HOT TAKE transadrophobia is a real thing and trans men saying they experience it isn't an "MRA take" we just view queer men as predatory.

What is NOT OK is calling OTHER TRANS PEOPLE terfs, that's essentially trans holocaust inversion and it's only use is to hurt people

Also MRA hate ALL feminists not terfs trans men's activists do kinda think everyone who hates them is a terf the way that Baedells see all opposition as "filthy tmes"

unfollow who you want but know WHY you're doing it and consider if it's your bigotry AS WELL as theirs

Cecil

[worstutfanonthingpoll]

I deleted tumblr for like,, two days and now the misgendering vs lesbophobia polls are overrun with terfs.

I don't know if me saying the poll was lesbians vs trans/non binary people came across as offensive, and if it did I'm sorry. I didn't mean it seriously.

I don't like terfs. I'm literally genderqueer. If you're a terf unfollow right now. You're not welcome here.

I'm deleting the misgendering vs lesbophobia poll because of this, and both quality for the revival rounds. Sorry about this.

[heading-home-again]

Hi there! If I'm following your blog, it's because I like your blog. It's not complicated.

If I recently I UNfollowed your blog, it is not intended as hostile or passive aggressive or saying I don't think your blog is good. It's just not what I'm looking for on my dash right now.

I will make a heroic effort not to descend like a swarm of monotropic locusts and spam like half your blog, but honestly no promises. Unless you have something in profile or pinned saying not to, I do try to check for that.

I post/reblog

Lots of Murderbot Diaries content

Like, a lot :D

Also OCD and autism stuff

Also just cool stuff like nature and cute cats

Also sometimes politics

I'm "old" (40ish)

I don't have a DNI and I don't vet blogs I reblog from at all. I don't even do an ideological purity test on blogs I follow. When I post or reblog something onto my Tumblr, however, I do attempt to filter out the following:

Obvious OCD triggers. I can't catch em all, but I'm at least not going to repost "reblog or you're a bad person" stuff

Political despair

Racism, antisemitism, TERF and radfem stuff, transphobia, erasure, sus call-out posts (that's most of them), etc

Things I think are interesting include various fandoms, nature pics, cats, animals being cute or cool, marine life (OCTOPUSES! WHALES!), space, mental health, neurodivergence and neurodiversity, psychology in general, childhood and child development, parenting, children's rights.

I have OCD and am very interested in how to live well with it.

I don't have an autism diagnosis, but I have found that about 80% of what LSN autistics say about their experiences and effective life hacks applies to me, so ... I am EMBRACING the ambiguity, which I love SO MUCH (sarcasm).

My age is greater than thirty.

I don't give away money on Tumblr. This is a hard line. Doesn't mean I don't believe you, don't think you deserve help, or don't think you should be asking for it. Does mean that asking me here is a waste of your time.

I don't engage while too angry to think. I also have a busy life. These are two possible reasons I'm not replying. Second is more likely.

I am currently trying to learn about narcissism and NPD for several reasons. One being that, once I started researching it on Tumblr, I found I had some of the symptoms. The other being that I've experienced abuse from a friend who almost definitely should have been diagnosed with NPD. The third being that I just think psychology is interesting.

I may currently be following your blog because of this interest, and if so I'm putting in a warning that the next part is me processing difficult stuff and talking about "narcissistic abuse". (And while I hope you won't block me, I understand if you do. I will absolutely take it personally, lol, but I won't, like, have an online fit about it)

Being a condescending asshole about abuse victims may get you blocked. This includes abuse victims who describe their experience as "narcissistic abuse." Yes, the "narcissistic abuse" survivors community is ableist AF. It's also what got me out of a soul destroying, physically dangerous situation. Sometimes things are complicated. Abuse victims, other than a weird mostly non-existent subclass of perfect innocent ideal victims who responded exactly right, are also a huge target of social prejudice. If you don't understand this, and the way it contributes to things like toxicity in the "narcissistic abuse" community, maybe just... don't be rude about abuse survivors?

That said, if you're describing your own experiences as "narcissistic abuse," I'd encourage you, once you are out of survival mode, to consider moving away from the term, for a whole bunch of reasons.

[cecelovesrats]

Hey psst you got a terf following (or at least rbing) from you. url is vulvaic.

can't believe they aren't scared off from the nonbinary pride flag and pronouns in bio. thanks for letting me know, my notes tend to be cluttered so i can't really check

terfs should die. my rats love and support trans people as do i. if you're transphobic in any way unfollow me now.

[jellybeanium124]

Hi, Australian Jew here.

Sending this anonymously because I'm not openly Jewish on Tumblr, however I am considering doing so in the short-term.

I'm sorry to bother you but I wanted to ask you a few questions, if you're open to it (feel free to ignore this if so). Just so you know, I'm asking the same questions of the Jewish bloggers I follow who post regularly - both those who blog about the current Israel/Palestine situation, and those who identify as Jewish but post mainly fandom/other content.

Do you or have you receive/d abuse for being Jewish, or for your stance on the war? If so, how often? How do you respond to any hateful messages? Do you post them publicly or answer them privately? How much would you say your mental health is/has been affected by any messages, or by the content you see on your feed? Have you developed any strategies for handling social media during this time?

Thank you for reading. :-)

I've received maybe half a dozen antisemitic hate anons since 10/7. I wanna say maybe 2 or 3 between june 7, 2020 (when I created this blog) and oct 7, 2023. I think I've posted the hate anons publicly once or twice, but after that I just screenshotted, blocked them, and sent them to one of my jewish friends for mocking. honestly they didn't bother me that much. a lot of them were low effort. nobody even threatened to kill me. the terfs put more effort into harassing me and I'm not even trans. frankly the antisemites need to step up their game.

while the messages haven't hurt me... yeah... the war in general has affected me. I've lost a lot of faith in the strength of my relationships with goyim. several of them have left me. every time I post about the war I'm certain I'm going to lose another friend, and that hurts. it's been a little nerve-wracking discussing it with my irl goyische friends, but to my massive relief all of them are normal about the situation. however, about a month ago, me and a friend of 15 years got into a small tiff about it, and when they went radio silent all day, visions of them hating me filled my head and I had to send a super annoying socially anxious text to make sure they don't hate me now. thank gd they do not. I love them deeply and want them to be in my life for as long as we live. we still have to come up with a gender-neutral alternative to aunt/uncle for my kids to call them someday. if they decided to cut me off that would've been the last straw for a mental breakdown, actually.

sometimes it gets really tough to see this stuff on my dash. I've gotten better at just filtering out all the blocked posts that pass me by. to be perfectly, 100% honest with you, if tumblr didn't allow me to block content so thoroughly and I had to see every single post about the war put onto my dash... I would've left tumblr months ago. or just unfollowed 95% of the people I follow. I could not handle that. I'm sorry. this war did upset me enough to the point where I decided to take a two-day break from tumblr (I... have a problem... you all know how much time I spend here...). I've lost a close friend on tumblr of several years that made me cry. as for other social media? I only look at two people's instagram stories these days. one of my friends, who posts her outfits daily and basically nothing else, and con o'neill. I don't trust anyone else not to put stuff that will upset me in front of my eyes. I've unfollowed a couple of people on instagram because I can't block stuff as thoroughly there. I'm also just... not on ig that much.

the past several months have also made me deeply disillusioned with the state of the left. why should I care about unrelated leftist movements when I know all of my comrades there would turn on me in a millisecond if they knew that I thought israel should keep existing even though it's done horrible things? it's turned me off of activism... seeing these "pro-palestine" protests quickly turn into "harass jews" protests and the way these college students discuss these issues, fetishizing palestinian pain and not knowing a single thing about it, is just... it makes it all feel so fake and hollow. these privileged college kids are comparing themselves to gazans and I'm supposed to believe they actually care about gazans and don't just want to feel like righteous heroes? these people verbally and physically harass jews and I'm supposed to believe they're the good guys? I don't like feeling this way. I wish I didn't feel this way. but right now the only political action I give a shit about is voting. I'm gonna vote. I'm always gonna vote. but why on earth would I get involved with people who say "punch nazis" until nazis are on their side and increase their numbers then suddenly it's all "uwu nazis are hard to get rid of 🥺?"

I understand why you're hiding your jewishness. I've started hiding it too. I stopped wearing my magen david on october 13th. I recently had my first paid film gig (yay for that at least), and whenever I was telling a story that involved my jewishness in some way, I bent the truth to go around that tidbit and told no one. someone asked if I was irish. I answered I was eastern european. a year ago I would've said I was jewish without a second thought.

I'm tired. I want the war to end. I want there to be a peace deal. I want innocent civilians to stop dying and be safe.

I don't think I'm brave, or anything. I'm a safe lil american thousands of miles away. I don't know what palestinians and israelis are living through right now. my pain is a single molecule of sand compared to the pain people actually affected by this war have gone through. all I want is for people to listen to us. I don't speak up to be brave, I speak up because knowing a jew is the only inoculation against the hatred spreading through the pro-palestine movement. because if you know me, then jews aren't foreign. noa's a jew. noa's my friend. noa likes billy joel. noa writes silly incorrect quote posts. noa's a person. she's not some scary unknown. she's my friend.

I wish people still wanted to be my friend.