#if you think I’m hot you have to tell me. nobody knows what causes endometriosis so… it might cure me

[briarrolfe]

Watch out, he’s wearing a wire!!

…We had a three hour drive to get to my fiancé’s family Christmas in Warrnambool, so I’ve been blasting my new TENS machine.

One of the things I’ve found shittiest and most unexpected about chronic pain is that I rarely get to feel hot anymore, so please feel free to lust after me.

[wallwriterstuff]

Untitled Pain

So this is in response to the challenge set up by @thisismysecrethappyplace and I used the dialogue prompt of “If you can look me in the eyes and tell me you feel nothing between us, then I’ll stop and leave this alone.”. 

Characters: Dean Winchester x Female Reader (she/her pronouns)  Warnings: Undiagnosed condition, low-self-esteem, insecurity

Summary: Angst that does turn to Fluff! She’s sure she’s unlovable, that she’s too broken to be held together in loving arms. Dean wants to prove her wrong. 

She really didn’t deserve him.

 Not him with his sharp jawline and enthralling emerald eyes. Not him with the body of a Greek God and killer-watt smile that lit up plenty of girls – and guys – when he entered a room. Not him, whose determination could rival that of a hundred soldiers and was fiercely loyal to those he loved. It was a fantasy to believe he could love her, and she knew it. Nobody could love something so broken, and this…this was exhibit A.

 She was doubled over in the kitchen of her small apartment, unable to straighten out but also unable to sit at the bar stools behind her while she waited for the water to boil. Her hot water bottle lay discarded on the side, ready to be filled as another sharp wave of pain made her fold even further in the middle before she forced herself to straighten out. She was desperate for it to end. She’d taken pain killers and the antispasmodics her doctor had prescribed for her in an effort to relieve the pain when it came, but nothing had kicked in so far, and even when they did, she knew the pain would linger in a form of discomfort unlike anything else she’d ever experienced.

 For now, she’d have to hobble like a hunch-back to get her water bottle back to her bedroom, gasping and whimpering as she went when the pain let her know that whatever it was wasn’t a fan of the movement. She had to just get to bed, to lie flat on her back and let the waves of pain lap at her until they passed. There was no other treatment, no other remedy. The hot water bottle was burning hot against her skin, even above layers of pyjamas, but the heat was soothing in a way the drugs never were. She was still unsure what worked to “cure” the pain, to stop the stabbing and tearing of her lower abdomen as it tried to…well she wasn’t even sure what it was trying to do.

 Two hours of relentless torture where her bladder and bowels malfunctioned, taunting her with the need to use the bathroom and then deciding that actually there was nothing to come away with at all. Two hours of sharp twisting and pulling and stabbing in her gut that had her sure she was dying before it ceased and she wondered if maybe, just maybe, she was lucky enough for that to be the last one. It never was, and she couldn’t move. Movement hurt, to sit up straight at a chair hurt, to lie down still hurt – there was no winning. No…no, he could never love someone this broken. As if the pain wasn’t enough to make her cry, the overwhelming desperation of just wanting to be well again, coupled with the intense feeling of rejection and hopelessness certainly was. It wasn’t the first time she’d cried herself to sleep that way either.

 Not that Dean knew. All he was aware of was that she wasn’t answering her phone, and that could mean many different things. Logically he had concluded that she was most likely fine and simply busy, perhaps with her college work, but the niggling anxiety wouldn’t leave him just yet. Cas had just come home, Cas had been dead, Dean had grieved. He wasn’t going to be grieving again anytime soon if he could help it. Maybe that was what had pushed him into Baby and onto the open road? He had never consciously made the decision to go and was taken by surprise when he found himself outside of her apartment. He’d been seeing her for roughly a month now, long enough for him to have been to her place once or twice, but never for anything more than dinner. Oddly, Dean didn’t mind.

 He couldn’t remember ever having anything steady since Lisa, and the thought that maybe this was a sure thing was terrifying. To drag her into this world was to drag her away from innocence and normalcy and into a whole other realm of destruction and death. Did he really have it in him to do that to her? Then again, he didn’t think he had it in her to live without her anymore either. A month wasn’t long, but it felt like a lifetime when it was with the right person. She was funny, never took herself or life too seriously, and it helped she was truly gorgeous. More than one person had eyed her for her figure, for her hair, and he had glared them all away to claim her for his own. She wouldn’t let him do that just yet, but he was sure he would be allowed one day. He didn’t want to just leave her this time, didn’t want a one-night thing, but he was also too afraid to selfishly ask her to stay in his world. Hell, after she saw it, she probably wouldn’t want to stick around anyway.

 Her door was open.

 His hand automatically went to the gun tucked into the waistband of his jeans, and with his hand resting on the grip he tentatively pushed the door open. It looked the same as it was when he’d left a few nights ago, the same bright open space in her closet sized apartment with the colourful furniture still in place and –

 The bills were on the floor.

 Dean pulled the gun free of his jeans, keeping it held at chest level as his entire body tensed. He was sure she’d have picked them up, she was too much of a neat freak to leave them there like that scattered on the floor. Water had splashed on the side in the kitchen to and the tap was still dripping where it wasn’t properly turned off. No, no something here wasn’t right. A floorboard creaked behind him and he whirled around, eyes widening when she jumped and almost immediately clutched at her side with a grimace.

 “Are you hurt?” he demanded, lowering his gun and hurrying to her side.

 He had to get her out of here, whatever had attacked her might still be lingering. She wasn’t bloody, maybe broken ribs? No, her hand was placed way too low for ribs.

 “Dean what the hell are you doing in my apartment? With a gun!” she cried.

 She was watching him with wide eyes, and he swallowed.

 “Are you hurt? Who else is in here? Did they attack you?” he asked again, voice firmer now.

  He needed answers, had to find and deal with whatever it was to give her time to escape and-

 “Dean there’s no one here, just me. How did you even get in?” she asked exasperatedly. He slowly lowered the gun, his brows furrowing.

 “Your door was open and the letters on the floor, the water spillage…looked like signs of a struggle to me. Your favouring your left side Y/N, what’s wrong?” he questioned.

 She bit her lip, looking away from him, and Dean wondered briefly if the whole situation had been misread. Maybe she was going to come out with a funny story about pulling a muscle reaching for something on the cupboards top-shelf. He had to take a moment to process the idea that she was really safe and sound.

 “I must not have closed the door properly when I came back in, sorry for scaring you.” She sighed.

 She forced herself to straighten out, but he could see her rubbing her side still, massaging the skin as she made herself a cup of coffee and offered him one. Dean shook his head, gripping her arm and turning her to face him with eyes full of concern.

 “I want to know why you’re in pain sweetheart.” He said, voice softer now, “Please…let me help.”  

 By now she had turned her face away, the shame in her eyes obvious. Dean didn’t understand, couldn’t see the internal debate she was having. She didn’t want him to run from her, didn’t want him to leave because she was too broken and required some maintenance. She really did like him. She liked how he’d hold her on movie nights in that way that always made her feel warm and safe. She liked how he’d come in here guns blazing just to make sure she was okay, because he cared. She liked that he had a smile that crinkled his eyes, and more often than not she was the reason he smiled that smile. She liked him, but if she wanted to keep him, she had to be honest and let him decide.

 “I…I’m not hurt. I have a condition that causes me a lot of pain sometimes.” She confessed quietly. Dean was silent for a moment, and when she risked a glance up at him, he looked more concerned than before. Slowly, he nodded his head and reached behind her to fix his own mug of coffee. With a mug in each hand he jerked his head towards the sofa, and her heart leapt. He’d hear her out at least, and then he’d most likely be gone.

 “What condition?” he asked. She savoured looking at him, tracing the plains of his face with her eyes and trying to brand the image into her memory.

 “I don’t really know. I’ve had an ultrasound before, and a pelvic MRI just last week that I’m waiting on results for. It could be any number of things, but my doctor said it’s potentially adhesions, ovarian cysts or endometriosis.”

 “Okay, so…what the hell’s the first and last ones?” his brows furrowed considerably, and she couldn’t help but smile.

 He looked darned adorable when he was confused, though it was rare since he was quite sharp and intelligent.  She explained it as best she knew how, that adhesions were internal surgical scars that stuck her organs together and endometriosis was essentially tissue you’d find in the womb growing where it shouldn’t be. He had paid rapt attention throughout her entire explanation as she told him exactly how debilitating the pain could be, that it had flared up suddenly that morning and she’d had to stagger back up the stairs to her apartment and in through the door, hence why it had failed to close properly. His hand had moved to her knee at some point, thumb rubbing soothing circles over her pyjama’s bottoms.

 “It’s only occasionally like that though right? I mean, you’ve been fine whenever we’ve seen each other.” Dean said, looking somewhat hopeful.

 “Actually, not always. It’s not always sharp enough to confine me to bed, sometimes it’s just really uncomfortable, like a tight cramp where your muscles really tense in your shoulder but, low in my stomach, like the skin’s been stretched too far underneath. It’s easier to work around that though.” She admitted.

 Dean’s frown deepened as she explained that pain medication was only of limited use, that it didn’t really work, and as he listened to her story he saw her change from his happy-go-lucky girl to a fighter. She was strong to live with this, he realised. Too always be in discomfort or pain was no easy challenge, he knew from wearing his injuries as they healed, and to know she suffered in silence with a smile on her face most days was both heart-breaking and…daunting. How strong was this woman? Strong enough to tackle his lifestyle choice, he was starting to think. But she was crying now, and he automatically reached for her tears, surprised when she flinched away.

 “Hey, hey come on now sweetheart.” He murmured.

 “D-don’t pretend, it’s okay. You can leave, I get it.” She sniffed.

 Dean’s head jerked back in surprise. She wanted him to leave? No…no she wouldn’t meet his eyes. She didn’t want him to leave, she thought he wanted to, she was ashamed of her condition, of having no name and no diagnosis, of being unable to help herself just yet until the results she needed were found. He cupped her face firmly in his grasp, turned her head and planted a short but forceful kiss on her lips. He searched her wide eyes, spotted every insecurity and formulated plans on how to tackle them.

 “I ain’t leaving sweetheart. Not now, not ever.” He promised her.

 “But – but why? There’s thousands of girls out there who aren’t broken, people you don’t have to look after or fix.”

 Dean let his hands fall to her sides, one place tenderly on her waist while the other gently rubbed the sore spot on her stomach. She looked at him with such vulnerability that Dean understood his next words would make or break them, and his tongue suddenly felt heavy as he thought of what he wanted to say. He weighed each word carefully before he spoke, praying they were the right ones.

 “I don’t mind some maintenance work, I’ve got enough scars that need some TLC every now and then to. You’re not broken, not to me, your strong, and beautiful. I don’t know what this is, but I’ll be with you every step of the way as we find out, and when we get a diagnosis we can get you a proper treatment and get you better, okay? Alternatively…if you can look me in the eyes and tell me you feel nothing between us then I’ll stop and leave this alone.” He said.

He pulled back to give her room to think, to let her decide to let him in or not. Her chin touched her chest briefly, fingers twisting together as was her nervous habit. She wanted it, he could see she wanted it so badly, but she was still so afraid it was too much for him, that he’d leave. He mentally prayed she’d take the chance, hoping Chuck was listening and felt like throwing some divine intervention his way so he could keep the angel across from him.

 “I feel it to…I’ve always felt it.” She conceded.

 Her eyes met his, and Dean couldn’t help but grin at her, scooting forward to properly take her hand and pull her closer to his body. She bit her lip, a small smile forming on her face.

 “We’re in this together then, you and me vs…whatever the hell’s going on down there.” He vowed. A breathy laugh escaped her, the relief evident in her face as Dean kissed her. It was slow and sweet, savouring the taste of her lips as his hands slipped around her waist. He hoped she could feel it all through that kiss, the love and the passion, the desire and the admiration. His hands had automatically moved to dip below the waistband of her jeans and she pushed him back slightly with a light blush. He gave a quiet apology and she smiled.

 “Probably not a good idea for me when I’ve had a flare up to be tensing my muscles like that…but there’s no reason you can’t.” her coy smile was enough to get him halfway there as it was, and when her hands began to tug at his belt buckle, he knew he had been right.

 Chuck had certainly sent him an angel, and he was determined to help heal her.

[tacticalpain]

Tactical Pain Episode 014 End Endometriosis

This week Jeni Mc interviews Tessa, who was diagnosed with Endometriosis.  Tessa discusses the great pain and difficulties this condition can bring. Over 200,000 cases are diagnosed in the United States each year.  It is a chronic condition that effects can last for years and among other terrible side effects, it can result in infertility. Endometriosis is also highly hereditary and Tessa discusses the health implications for her daughter and the methods they use to keep her healthy. This episode is sponsored by DiPSy Doodle Productions Voice Talent Dave Holly https://www.dazzleshows.com/dipsy   [su_spoiler title="Machine Transcript"] [0:56] What's the matter with nerd herd tactical pay hide cat in your house jenny mac. We are here today to talk about real mean and real strategies for a better life. Today i am going to be hanging with my dad has the about living life with and me three of the. I have to thank you for joining me today for honeymoon were talking about, no because other than the air regulator time there earning in march which and me through the where next month and you how are history of being aware of and for every month, i did not get one month for. What what about your little background on what no is if you would please. Go in israel is. To not be done around the to make it easier to understand doing so i. Take your address on her the scar tissue and adhesions in her, i'm usually on the red on on the ovary is on a cul-de-sac. Can i attach itself to your bottom of your abdominal wall on your bladder number of course goes on and on because it and my great. [2:33] I'm fred. Is affected by the hormones in your body who you really are. I'm not seeing the average woman by tuesday morning hand liters of your period. On me after i was done to like two three days in my home like every other all the other days not. Now they basically it. We are under dash unit at the right level did you can cause your skin to bleed on the card presented to play not. Dr martin are you okay and wherever it detached i'm not your cramping from your your body lying. Let's have a break down a bit to make it easier to understand. [3:37] And is there something that from your very first period you are experiencing or the something that. Increase over time. Well no usually with your first period is not gonna be an issue because you buy and how do i need to check other places. Okay thank. Are you here for college either okay hold does a guy was trying i'm so i didn't really notice anything and how i was about. I have had for at least control of your mind ibuprofen and. You ready for my mama what are the women who are you die. No need to pay something for and she used more colorful language than that i'm. Hello i was just thinking for a dealer for around it was never something that you look deeper until entire nineteen. And that's something we we talked about the idea that women are free programmed to believe this is archer and period and it will be and the bad. That's the one of the bed that is really awful and where were programmed to believe it should be bad. [5:14] Right exactly because. The for our parents you know the answer in fact i'm fourteen and i'm with daniel sixteen whatever the hair the knowledge that yeah that series about the stock is there he informed us that. So your saying. [5:35] And and we always been told to hide it i know were not talking about that you don't talk about that right and. We don't talk about and how to let you know that how that. I have model for an old i have had in the nineteen you need to get that checked out because around me like you have no and. You and i talked about you not wanting to get serious times look like you have the right. There are not educating them how else are we supposed to change it rain even if we. The leader bay i'm on my period and we don't talk about water period is or what it's like even for women with other chronic pain conditions i know that with my fibro. The dealer of god and in depending on the days i'm in with my fibro some period are are much worse and and now i'm lucky enough to know the difference between a mild an average. Normal period birthday to when things are really bad and if we don't talk about it. How does anybody know what the standard for my own use of year is exactly yeah road to the whole period what is available and then back to normal. [7:05] You should be able to function. And what could be able to have a life who should be out of work or school speaker children whatever it case maybe. What color crown seventy one throw up and die. [7:23] And i think there's a lot of times and you gone through that where you even when you probably should have been bed ridden you don't have to put your responsibility you going to work or money did all those thing. [7:39] Yeah you do this part of your life like you said you only had two good days a month you can be a mom just for today i am on. Oh nice lol not that i did a woman learn to live with and how real level of pain that is not normal. Lol alright volume money and exactly there. If you're not hot you're a pain in your friend in your doctor you have roof top. Play comparable hockey your spouse for you know sir friends are fine. Do you have to be local you have to talk about it need to try a doctor degree from nobody else just character. They don't listen to you complain entirely do you find a new doctor. Find me a doctor what about let's talk about how you can hear that i know that you notice in your late teens early twenties the years your period where. Working for margaret then they probably should be holy and not all like this directly. The first thing that means anything goes. Get past theory out that wasn't my mom had a hysterectomy at twenty seven she kinda forgot that part was required to the nearest my first app and nineteen. [9:14] I'm horny dollars because i'm a. I have to have a period of time where i had to lay down if i didn't lay down the minute i saw that i had to change my clothes. And i can work in time to the job and during the period i was really glad to much lol that and the whole job like that way. [9:42] I have forgot you forgot about her period she anything because she didn't see that there are really bad storm so far but the chain you down too often. Hello i placed in a group member control am. Can you deliver with the birth control usually the first line of the first line of medical defense most doctors will that have irregular difficult period regardless of the condition. Yeah hello. Yeah there and give me shouldn't matter calling in birth control doesn't stop our ability to get pregnant if it's a hormone replacement therapy where were dot org asking arm on. Exactly and you know it didn't at first yes help i don't recall having issue is set. Tell me the time of nineteen very twentieth. I'm here if you need my grandma lot about being a lot of pain and. Shoe me that i have not so she of course you know hey calcium magnesium and zinc in thailand was your prescription. And it didn't help him and then get virgil i'm not backing ibuprofen and tylenol that my tried to adjust the person. [11:12] I am in my twenty years i have been and when i wake two am bunny because it hurt so that. Replace that i was emergency room. And this pregnancy has it was live with me i heard on their contact the. I need after your mom in the morning it is morning on it every time my now ex husband was military so i had a few days after first. Alright we now go to your closet in the year date of my neck you can you give me ideas and birth control. I'm. And before and after that can we were home for ninety days and in my general doctor let them in for a great year. And you can not giving dr in the parking lot. And the wonderful colonel back is he wanted to remove my left ovary because it looks. In that time are you had for diagnostic measures was a physical path did they do an ultrasound profit from. [12:43] And i can't be diagnosed from just no sound no no i'm. Something to think hannah and i don't know how that's possible because i see pictures i have my pictures i think it is on line you know i do my research i follow up on that it was a black shirt. Late there is no way you can see the on off around. And always i pictures because the camera and have been and will be removing some scar tissue. [13:22] And the water looks like black shirt is leaking pee office on. [13:30] So dr wanted you take one of your ovaries and your in your mid twenties and have a child yet no. [13:38] I'm in a client that. What could be allowed to when civilians go to the medical doctor and they say i have to have it back nothing in before doing anything like that. Room in back is unity do not present i was a civilian they had to help pay to this terrible terrible man. No my daughters middle name is his last name and not have to pay and. I mean just wanted to set up for one year old girl with the bacterium so he's on it i grandpa. Of course she had in mind that it's a push heating were here shut up and take something and that. Is it a lot but it just made me cry just through there is nothing wrong and that's when i found. [14:41] And after that. Regardless of the physical pain that you had to go through what. What was it like in motion to get an idea like that with where you relieved because finally happening answer where you. Here are all. I don't know what to do after everything freaking me now you now i'm a after paying the diagnosis no idea what they were talking about when it was and. And where were annual little on how to share palate. On the right you know i yesterday research history but you you don't look for answers and. [15:35] And can there answer was one thirty two trillion chemical menopause. On in the home front and me and is it a long way in the last year on fifteen years by. Back then it was shot but i got one from on high thank god for health care for the military because one shot was five hundred dollar. [16:05] And now something in the that occurred to me is that. Even the diagnostic experience if you had not been ensure heard was you gone to the doctor at all or if your insurance is not covered the. Things would you have gone at all because again women are supposed to have a period. Right exactly no absolutely not i mean is insurance for the kind of insurance or the ability to pay that much for coming on so they can tell me what's wrong and i can't fix it. Rain at our lady mean in the year period. Yeah it's me again and the little girl i'm so if you don't have insurance or the right insurance or the insurance absolutely i'm. Personally i do know that right here in washington state medical will cover after the and it says your. Surgery is out. I have a friend to how to had insurance and he was capable of being on the diagnostic so you know there are ways around it but i highly doubt it up for five hundred. Right i'm so i didn't run which was in a coma. [17:37] Which was how i thought my god i hope it doesn't happen again. [17:46] What time is good for the baby is come along way i do research for luke bryan i found out that it could be used as a chemical castration. Your man and dramatic that it is it is how long will. Absolutely it's not pretty hard is not for me that is it is heavy duty. And anybody how you did anybody give you any insight into how that could be before you get. Now not reading any information that you are happy and then say that you know i forget where the numbers were back then dies it work and i was like seventy percent of running. React well to run the fact that they don't have pain after a on and i was enrolled to the fact that and put them in canada enterprise, i made my body hurt after it has been shot, yeah yes i hate when the wind last for the rest of your life because i know you said is expected and i'm on treatment. What's happening monday ten. Hi i'm money penny was sitting three and there was a person is me pain free for the next five to seven years. [19:21] Any where that at all the case hold on now i'm not is freaking leisure nine months. I say green and it back shot which are the nicest flat on. And the two worst one now here in the winter when being in ninety eight with a fan on me. I didn't ask you for anything and it is so bad. No add me any insight on any of that and again your still in your twenty your. Not yet a mom. No the name between prime and and later on you you did get pregnant what were they. Lower the running the tried and and what is the matter talking about your risk of infertility and. And i really want you have to take the test for you unable to conceive. Right i'm not really happy that any of that eventually they did say hey there are you in three days i can't incorrectly but it was hysterectomy. [20:57] Not at the radiator twenty seven. Right on dr pushed in place in history hysterectomy and you have to understand around and like now i refuse to not willing to. And so i you know justin account now so we're talking universal control. Because your friend. And then you know just how it is ibuprofen and tylenol whatever the case maybe i can hear the pain and then just suck it up buttercup. [21:42] How old are you when you did finally become president. Three i lower the longer a woman. [21:55] I don't wanna wait to the twenty seventh baby whenever they want but but there are different as you get older determine your own house arrest the so you had. What the what would happen to the and when you finally do become pregnant. What happened to carry her nolen and i was lucky i'm coming having the entire page is entertaining lol a. And the lucky i have the entire time i was pregnant and how about tells you about nine months old so i had but he month being pain free and it was marvelous. [22:40] Can you have dan dealing with. What year you work twenty days of paying per month for fifteen years at that point right. Hello after that and started to return and read her. Looking back with a vengeance if you like test at me because i got pregnant i only plane. It didn't gradual thing it came back on for one apple on like. Yeah like that yeah it worse before it was hard function. [23:29] And that's how you came to making the decision you made in the last couple years because it was just the pain anymore it with your quality of life, right now i have this the little girl that i have to i mean on the that have helped but the little girl that is the amount of roasted garlic r and you feel trapped and you clean and. Not be why are canadians had enough time right. [24:00] And you did to go for the full hysterectomy yet ready for gym forty. That is what can and at that time they decided that. [24:16] I need a container one more time but it didn't hold because of course means i'm at that point i was thirty seven. Turn it on it hold on we decided that probably having another one wasn't really feasible low on a high breast cancer so for. United we go ahead and how do you correct me to come to improve my quality of life and. [24:52] Garrett very misconception of public bed and hysterectomy is the cure for endo that not go. [25:03] We are not all the hair did you can be totally separate from the years and bread and other parts of body. What are the speeding ticket away evening still be there. Absolutely girl who we chose to remove everything ovaries uterus and cervix. I am a manager not to do so hormone replacement therapy because now in the in the into surgical menopause. Are there any that was not to do the hormone replacement because we want to be be in jail. Because that's exactly what you're doing on your hormones back in and tightly removing everything from the farmers burn that. I'm so it didn't. I mean for me i live in relatively it but if it's not attached to the nearest but cannot attach to. The back side of your bladder am to hear. Can you please turn on backend know that he is working with the police on an employer out at the hormones back in. [26:24] Thirteen that we had a hidden monster. I wanna be taking a vacation that the source away. And there can still be some hidden somewhere navy inadvertently for the growth of it again. Yeah and it still grow in your uniform on and you don't even have to do hormone replacement if you are month i'm out our beef are chicken at four hundred one than. Why why one and when and how it is because our society comes from on an two or three. [27:10] And you tried to go up. Is the surgery the side. Knowing that be you potentially still could have and o-o living in your body you were diagnosed with secondary pain condition. Yeah i'm looking to buy them out and. [27:41] Probably with dealing with that and didn't realize it in addition to the end of the end or very overwhelming. I'm doing so how did you handle. [27:58] How do you handle being told oh by the way here's hoping to be in pain for the rest of your life. [28:06] You know after the paper so i can just take the gran fondo okay well mercury six figure the chocolate one i. [28:17] The quality of life why is it better saying it is definitely. How can you be that i get to learn and have to legacy hacker change because we both know that's not gonna happen to deal with that is just a newbie that i have to learn to fight. [28:44] What is the one piece of advice that you would give to. The one in the back he has and i'll go talk to dr. And the doctor always says you can't manfully do and if they don need to find a doctor. There are good ones out there are resources to help you find one doctors if you have the means or the insurance on i was like enough to stumble upon one. Buy the there are good doctors out there they are compassionate and caring and. Their dad have forums where they actually you know post stuff think he lived there pain about about window and how they're treating that and they do take me. Personal. Take personal care unit they don't just say okay we're here we're going to destin you never talk to me again do you research it means travel to the doctors because it is lower. And your motivation beside your on how is your daughter's house. Yeah there's a there's a very high chance thank you rewind up with in the process. [30:10] What is your plan as a mom when she reaches that age where is time to start talking about the joys of womanhood. How do you do will definitely. Hello is only definitely because i know from my own personal story as well as i have all these friends that painful periods are normal. So since his on after we were looking at acupuncture and you know the right supplement to make sure that you know we are meeting her body hopefully with. This relation really picky eater so i don't think the diet lower my me. We will definitely be looking at you know okay told replica free range chicken rather than monitor pumps her mom let nature that we are looking at a rate that way how. I'm interested in those hormones that make me hurt worse and give her a hand. Yeah you're a chance to have another eighteen three because was no there's a lot of them were not right. Oddly enough her godmother leaving it at that time i had a windows well i am. Hello he has a resources and i forgot mother is forcing. [31:45] Like a healthier food for him so he can you will be a huge help as your helping your mind who is you like that may help reduce some of that information. [31:59] What do you think it is your great support system throughout. [32:07] All of this. You know in the morning there they're probably very little support and you didn't even know what hundred needed belt but now what do you think is your greater support system and how did you come to find it. God bless facebook i'm no my story dan doesn't feel out of in my he is huge for a four wire. He has done history homework she knows enough about not to be intelligent when you speak doing it hamper experience after dealer that he will that i have i done it as well. This is him, friends and facebook there are so many support groups out there the women are caring and compassionate and full of, it is only taking mine off then how to help us at the. [33:11] Yeah i'm good personal friends family are visiting fam was not. A house for six then i'm very well how that problem think we will find that really. We talked about this when our program you'll be at the pilot about her period not talk about that. That the growth that you know. Yeah absolutely i think your brother wanna hang out have fun talk with you absolutely not yo people. He just laughs you know what is in the process like you they think ten google at the door looking for pictures and i cannot help but yeah. I have a sister are here and there's people, i learned that one over time because i tell people and then it would look it up and the other half it because it is disgusting, i'm. No not like blood glory just testing it just when you looking at the entire human being right will never leave and we have there can you call at seven hundred four and. Ab absolutely absolutely send going forward. [34:42] Now you find it does the same support system that you reach out you are there for you with the fibro or is there a little bit of a fifty gal we're where your support system. There's only so much we can do right mom happy always to adapt that part of your life. Yeah again um offices and a homework me when i complain about something you understand what i'm saying i'm. I want the interviewing new director of dollar foreign in is you resource. I never was like it on line and lost my friend. [35:31] Are intelligent enough to look it up before they tell me old you now. Try to log in to their i hate hate on the oh yeah i think that you might. Yeah i'm sure you wanted the data from any you later have and or you don't have to that i need to live my. Not ready for the way. And no way to know the rpm power and nothing changes i'm. Solution pressure we don't know my friends are really gonna lie you know okay passage you really doing that i was in a. [36:19] Well i appreciate you talking with me you have a video of us talking a little bit about the history and on facebook as well i am. Where does it. For all of our listeners ami jamaica your mission if you are woman and you lose that you're going through something like that or you suspect someone in your life is. Don't be afraid to talk about it and if you are a man don't be afraid to talk about it you know what you think your wife or your daughter or your sister your mom. If you think they are going through something like that don't don't be afraid they will what can i do to bring a six pack of cupcakes. And for early one because now living yeah acknowledging that you me even if i don't know what to do you know if there is a huge. I think any painting this and having someone even if they admit that they don't know what to do they don't want to say that the reason there kinda stunned silence is because he was happening to. Absolutely not huge help to know that i'm not in the ball bad that you can hear that i'm in pain and struggling is a huge help. [37:46] Absolutely what i think you and i think i earn this year and. We live it up in the five that how that is their website to report on p three on and remember that over three and as always compassionate i was, go home and do your research go and enroll and and. [/su_spoiler]