#if you saw me repeatedly post and delete this no you didnt <3

[pyrusinc]

Staff and Line

A free day in P.E. gets a little more interesting when Marinette and Adrien decide to do a bit of friendly sparring.

The spread laid out before her is bountiful, foam swords and flimsy shields, yoyos and plastic batons, a handful of spinning tops, a squishy hammer, and what looks to be a single horseshoe. Truly the arsenal is formidable- and a little silly- all manner of toys and weapons inspired by the various magical personalities of Paris. Marinette glanced across the courtyard at Monsieur D'Agencourt, who was speaking animatedly into a phone and was entirely distracted, the students milling around him as much an afterthought as the "lesson" planned for the day, and she absentmindedly nudged one of the toys with her foot.

The plan for today, their teacher had explained with a handwave, was to practice "sparring." With Heroes' Day just around the corner, Marinette supposed she could understand the excuse to cover what was basically a free period. After all, who in the city hadn't imagined what it would be like to flit around with a miraculous? Sparring was a great way to burn some energy in all fairness, and in Marinette's case specifically the practice was actually quite useful. She eyed the various tools before leaning down to scoop up a plastic baton- she was already more than skilled with her trusty bandalore, so brushing up with a staff in case she and Chat Noir ever needed to swap weapons could be a good idea. She tested the balance of the stick and after finding it to be suitable, decided to run through some of the base stances and swings her partner had taught her. As she felt her muscles loosen up she became aware of someone watching her, and turning around she saw a familiar figure fiddling with a yoyo.

"Oh, hi Adrien. I didn't know you knew how to use one of those." She said brightly, leaning on her stick to test its strength.

Adrien smiled at her as he pulled off the trick he had been setting up for before replying; "I just dabble. I've got a friend whose great with them, though, and I've picked up a bit. Kinda itching to try some of the crazier stuff she's done with them, actually."

"Well..." Marinette tried, "If you want to practice using a yoyo in a weird way, we could try sparring?" She tried to pose the question casually, but internally she was beaming. If he said yes, this would be the perfect opportunity to impress him! She wasn't as skilled with a baton as Chat was, but she was willing to bet she was better than average....

"Oooh, great idea, Marinette! I guess... Whenever you're ready?"

Marinette nodded before swinging cautiously. He stepped out of the way easily, so she tried again, and again, he moved. Speeding things up, she tried for a jab that would just slightly miss him (she didn't want to accidentally hit him, after all) but to her surprise her momentum carried her forward and past where she was aiming- Adrien had actually caught her staff and deflected it! His laughter bubbled through the air behind her, and she couldn't help but smile to herself at the sound. Clearly he was better at this than she'd expected, so maybe a little more pressure was earned? She spun around, counter attacking, and managed to catch him slightly off guard. He managed to hop out of the way, then cast his yoyo out and towards her. She easily batted it away, but instead of it going dead in the air, Adrien managed to preserve its speed and reel it back with a flick of his wrist before sending it out again, this time at a different angle. Again, Marinette knocked it away, and she caught something like excitement in Adrien's eyes. This time when he reeled it back, he lunged forward and converted his momentum into a cobra-like strike with his weapon. The speed was impressive, but Marinette's reaction times were tuned to the trajectory of a yoyo, and once again she deflected- but this time Adrien anticipated it and had continued to move forward with the yoyo, twisting his body and whipping the toy through the air at an incredible velocity.

Marinette dropped to the ground as she heard the line of the yoyo whistle above her. Adrien teetered off balance for a split second, and Marinette tried to capitalize on his poor footing by aiming a jab at his legs, but he must have predicted it because he kicked off the ground in the direction he was facing and landed with a startlingly graceful roll, reeling in his yoyo as he came up to stand.

Marinette blinked. Clearly Adrien is better at this than he gives himself credit for, she thought, standing up and rolling her shoulders. No more holding back.

The pair descended into a whirlwind of flashing plastic and string, twirling and bounding around in what almost seemed like a dance. A few classmates began to watch, impressed at their skill, ooh-ing and ahh-ing as the tide waxed and waned in either's favor. After a minute or two, Adrien swung his yoyo in a wide arc, but in a flash Marinette shot forward, striking her weapon into the air and correctly predicting the trajectory of the attack. The yoyo line swirled around her staff, and hoping to disarm her opponent, she yanked her staff upward with a mighty tug. Too much force- she thought with a grimace as she felt the stick slip from her fingers.

The baton and yoyo sailed through the air, uncoiling and separating before falling in different arcs. Marinette snatched the closer of the two out of the air, the yoyo, as Adrien dropped into a low crouch to catch the staff.

"Well, you're certainly good with a yoyo, but I'm afraid we should probably call it here." Marinette called breathlessly, the familiar exertion of a friendly spar leaving her winded and more at ease than she usually found herself. "Because I guarantee I'm better."

Adrien snickered. "Bold words, princess, but can you back them up?"

Marinette grinned, the taunt igniting the fuse of competition that this duel had been building up, barely registering the fact that had insulted Adrien, or what he had called her in response. Without bothering to reply, she cast her yoyo in a breakaway trapeze before pulling the line taut and sending the yoyo rocketing through the air at a faster speed than any throw her opponent had managed. That was the issue with Adrien's technique, he was decent at managing spin and recovery, and his reaction times were excellent, but he clearly lacked finesse or real practice. Most of his attacks were simply whirling the yoyo in a wide arc and were easy to predict, but Marinette had studied the bandalore extensively. She had spent hours at night practicing with both her Ladybug yoyo and with normal ones just in case the magical properties were removed from her weapon again. She may still have been stunningly clumsy, but her steady hands and beetle-brand determination meant a simple toy transformed into a deadly weapon in her grasp.

If she were thinking maybe she would have remembered that and reigned herself in. As it stood now, though, she was enjoying herself far too much to bother.

The yoyo shot directly at Adrien's chest at a speed even Marinette wouldn't have been able to block in his position, but to her shock he thrust his staff out and hit it dead on, sending the projectile straight up. Marinette flicked her casting hand upward, creating a loop of slack in the line that twirled around the yoyo as it flew along its lazy arc before landing in a laceration. She pulled her hand away and sent the yoyo spinning up before landing it in another trapeze. Adrien regarded her warily, watching the yoyo spin on its line. He could barely react as she rapidly pulled her hands away from each other, sending the yoyo into a series of targeted shots.

Adrien ducked away, barely dodging her eli-hops before rushing towards her as she recast her line. Marinette's eyes widened as he pulled his staff back, ready to strike- he had recognized that she played for space, keeping him at arms length, and had realized that the best place to be to throw her off was inside her yoyo's range. Now, with her yoyo hovering uselessly behind him, Adrien had the advantage. Marinette scrambled away as the staff slashed through where she had just been before retaliating by reeling her yoyo back towards her aw quickly as she could. It shot back to her hand, and its path would send it straight into the back of Adrien's head. She had this in the bag.

But then, as though he had known its exact position without seeing it, he tilted his neck slightly to the side and let the yoyo fling past his ear with an audible whoosh. It hadn't even phased him.

Marinette caught the yoyo in a sidewinder and let it spin on her finger as she and Adrien circled each other, her mind whirling as fast as the plastic in her hand. His dodges were impeccable, she realized. What she had at first assumed to be lucky breaks, attacks flying past him a hair's breadth away, weren't accidental or fortunate footwork, Adrien's method of avoiding hits was to expend as little energy as possible dodging by only barely moving out of the way. It was risky, as misjudgment would result in a nasty knock, but it let him counterattack quickly and precisely without putting himself out of position or wasting energy on his own movement. Across from her, Adrien appeared to be running a similar analysis over her fighting style. She would have blushed under the attention if she weren't so carefully considering his movements and- there! That slight nod, she almost missed it in the chaos, but he had been doing it right before each strike. Like clockwork, it heralded this attack, too. Some distant part of her mind registered the habit as vaguely familiar, but she was too engrossed to think about it much more.

Adrien whirled toward her and she dodged and deflected each attack as they came, backing out of his range in anticipation of each lunge. More people gathered around the two of them, but they blurred into the background as Marinette focused on her target. He was getting faster with each strike, more confident in his advance, but Marinette wasn't giving anything up yet. They danced around each other, staff and line whistling through the air, drawing more and more attention. The only sounds in the courtyard were their heavy breathing and the crack of their weapons against each other. The world had faded, and there was nothing but their fight. She struck out at him with a barrage of whirling swings, but instead of shifting to the side like she had expected, Adrien thrust his stick upwards through the path of the yoyo's line, twilling the string around it and yanking it back.

He stole her trick!

The counter completely threw off her balance, and Marinette was pulled forwards towards Adrien and away from her ideal range. He flashed a determined grin at her as he watched her stumble into striking distance, but she flashed him a smirk of her own. If he could use her trick, she would use his: she leaned into the fall as the world tilted on its axis, kicking off the ground with all her strength like she had seen him do earlier. She aimed the palm of her left hand at Adrien's shoulder, and her jump sent her sailing through the air and directly above Adrien's lowered form. She grabbed his shoulder and used it as a springboard, pushing off him and sending herself flying through the air. Higher, higher, higher. She flicked her right hand, and the familiar weight of the yoyo whirled into her palm- expertly wound. Suspended, upside down, behind him... This was it. She cast her yoyo in time with her rising arc and hailed a flurry of eli-strikes directly at Adrien's back. Each one landed true, the first hits of the fight. The impact sent Adrien stumbling as Marinette began to right herself in the air, already brimming with smug satisfaction, but she felt her eyes widen as she started to fall. It was barely there, practically imperceptible against the downward arc of his fall, but she caught it. A tiny nod.

Oh no.

As Adrien fell, he whirled around and sent his staff directly under Marinette's landing position, sliding it into place just as her feet touched the ground. He twisted his grip and spun the baton beneath her foot, sending Marinette crashing to the floor. Stunned, Marinette was weightless once again, but she wasn't out yet. In the fraction of a second she had, she lashed out with one leg and caught the crook of Adrien's arm, ruining his recovery and sending him tumbling down with her.

The two lay there, a panting, sweaty heap on the asphalt for a moment before a rush of sound brought them back to reality. Cheering. Cheering, from all around them as their classmates laughed and whooped and hollered, applauding their fight, evidently shocked that two of the more thoughtful and upstanding students had that kind of fire in them. Marinette stared into the sky before taking a slow breath, the weight of what she had just done setting in. She slowly turned to look at Adrien on the ground beside her. He was nearly unrecognizable, hair mussed, cheek caked in dirt and pebbles, eyes wide in stunned appriciation. The pair stared at each other for a moment longer, before Adrien broke out into the most beautiful, heartfelt laugh, and the tension snapped.

Warmth bloomed through her as she watched him, and Marinette smiled, too.

[hcrris]

can ….. i come in ????? have been watching unbreakable kimmy schmidt for 3 hours pretending time isnt passing , life isnt real and in fact.. i am dreaming (-: lajdfksl hey <3 im jay im 21 and i love those instagram profiles of hamsters in little clothes ( when they got little purses? ???? dont talk to me im cryin. ) below u will find info about jane harris aka literally the vine of the little kid scribbling hard like his life depended on it. shes a mess ?? but a semi enjoyable mess. a mess with good intentions. if u want to establish some connections, LIKE THIS and i will come annoy u <3 alternatively u can ease my social anxiety and msg me here or through my discord sencha tea#4035 (و ˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و♡

( lily collins, cis female, she/her. ) — jane harris has been a medina complex resident for three years, now. they’re twenty-three years old, and they tend to avoid making eye contact. sometimes when i walk by B06, i hear cherry-coloured funk by cocteau twins playing. lately, i’d say they’re pretty effervescent, but sometimes that’s overwhelmed by the fact that they’re neurotic. i mean, they usually pay their rent on time, though, and that’s most important fact here.

repeatedly fixing the apartment number on the door when it swings down to a nine, a split moment of shadow after the radiance of laughter, carl sagan’s pale blue dot, a life of frequent minor accidents, constant hunger for balance overshadowed by emotional turbulence.

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TW ALCOHOLISM EMOTIONAL ABUSE DEPRESSION & ANXIETY !!!!! ok moving on

her parents met in art school in paris.. her mom is french and studied art history while her dad was an exchange student from california with a skewed artist mentality. it was that saccharine, toxic sort of love. her mom always felt like she needed to be the guardian angel in the relationship who would always hold him up when he was feeling down and he was feeling down….. a lot. because she was putting all that energy to save her relationship, she was drowning too but never enough to walk away. there was a lot of love there but it was twisted and uncomfortable at times

when they found out jane was on the way, it felt like they needed to suddenly grow up. her mom was ready to make changes, adapt to the new lifestyle. her dad, on the other hand, urged they rethink if this is what they want but he didn’t push for abortion.. he understood it was jane’s mothers choice to make and reassured that he would be there for the both of them no. matter. what. 

but ??? the reality was he felt trapped by the idea of a child and he struggled to acknowledge and accept how quickly his life was flipping upside down and how he lost all control of it. he wanted to travel around europe ???? soak in nature, daydream and make art . but jane’s mom wanted to settle. instead of embarking on adventures after graduating, they decided to move to california. 

things just seemed to fall apart like domino from then on. janes mom was lead astray.. thinking that what california would bring them was stability but instead, it was all chaos. they rushed to get married .. turned out janes father wasnt on good terms with his parents. he was irresponsible financially, put both his parents in huge debt, was blinded by his ego to ever realise his mistakes. lied constantly .. convincing janes mom that there’s light going forward. that once he finds a sponsor for his art .... once he sells his first piece ... once they see in him what he always saw in himself , he was going to make it right. and he reassured he would make it right for jane.

janes mom was so pathetically in love that she pushed through .. living in a sort of imagined world, believing that things were better than they actually were. and her dad was good at persuading that narrative. he would come home with a pocketful of cash and the bills paid. oftentimes, it was all an act. his art wasn’t selling and a lot of what he bragged about was borrowed or stolen. behind the curtain, he was absent and unmotivated. he would come home in the evening claiming that the whisky breath was celebratory but in reality, he was complaining to the barman two blocks away about how his life feels monotone .. like a french black and white movie.  

the day of jane’s birth was a whole mess. her father decided to drive her mother to the hospital, knowing he had one too many. they were caught for speeding and while janes dad spent the night at a nearby station for driving under influence, her mom was at the back of a cop car, crying for one too many reasons .. jane decided to hang on for a little while longer and was born at 3am the following night. cradled in her mothers arms and her dads voice humming on the line

jane would only ever hear the romanticised version of this story from her mother. this ??? fucked up sense of security that no matter what, love conquers all. that love means supporting each other, loving each other extra when everything else falls apart. but truth is.. her mother was forced to give up her own dreams, lost all connections to her past, worked days and nights at a nursing home to support her family and pitch in to her husbands alcoholism while she’s at it. making excuses that jane was too young to contradict. all while the only source of happiness for her father was the haziness of his evenings, when he felt like floating and he could barely hold onto to his paintbrush. he was a stranger living in their basement .. more than he was ever a father 

growing up, jane watched her mother mask her depression. carry empty bottles out from the basement, trying to hide it from jane .. it brought her shame. she was doing the same thing to jane that he was doing to her for all these years .. consistently expressing a certain attitude, this unwavering satisfaction for the life they are living and so ... it hardens. you start to believe it. except unlike her mother, jane was observant.. she had other lives around her to compare to her own, voices of reason that pierced through the skewed perception her mother drilled into her skull. when jane grew into her skin, she felt so ... disgusted and angry. she tried to pull her mother out of her fantasy but nothing worked. 

through her high school years, she felt helpless .. her home life was a nightmare and she made every possible attempt to stay out of it for as long as possible. she took on jobs and extracurriculars .. stayed at her friends’ house until she couldn’t. and she would think.. think so hard, she would start crying. pushing her own problems away .. in her head, she would imagine herself in a different skin, a different place. it was the only way she could calm her breathing. only to have to battle the same thoughts the following morning

after graduating high school, jane went to community college for product management got a job offering after her placement at a big company and moved out shortly after ( and MOVED IN to medina... can i get a yee yee ) .. she got insurance for the first time in her life and eats too many of free pizza slices at work to save up on groceries every week <3

she doesn’t visit her parents bc she no longer feels like her mother is on her team. she’s lived a maddening and terribly draining life and living alone has brought her deserving peace.. although she’d rather keep contact with her mother to a minimum, its obvious that jane is her mothers anchor. if she feels as though her daughter is not fighting for her, she breaks down.. as much as jane wants to run away from her past, it always seems to catch up 

if ur still reading literally who are u lafjdkl. ill be done schoon ..... oof 

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if they are friends ... jane. will. talk. ur. ear. off. but probably not for the right reasons lol .. she has never been assessed by a professional, isn’t taking any treatment but she definitely needs it :( shes a chronic overthinker.. the voice in her head keeps chattering away most of the time which gets a little nauseating. she hates silence and feels like she needs to fill it with words. she often says the wrong things .. to the wrong people ... at the WRONG time and she is very aware of it. its the culprit for her self doubt and struggle to open up emotionally to the people shes close to. shes very critical towards herself, she micro analyses everything from the way she acts, the way she looks and what she says. shes also not a fan of confrontation !!!!!!!BUT!!!!!!!!!!!

 she is a FIREBALL when she stands up for others. i dont know how she hasnt gotten into a physical fight yet. she would literally rip ur side mirror off ur car if u didnt wait for an old lady to cross the street. is intense in every possible way. if shes angry, shes angry and impulsive and out of control, when she is in love, she feels it in her bones and simultaneously wants to rip her hair out, when she’s passionate about something, she is persistent until she isn’t and when she loses motivation, everything feels bleak .. theres never any emotional balance, even though she fights so hard for it every day 

likes sci fi movies .. literally when they are Floating in space ???? SIGN! JANE! THE! FUCK! UP! letterboxd is probably her favorite app. sometimes she will post a review, read it over and over, find something wrong with what she said and then delete it. shes very neurotic. she either has good days where she can comfortably be herself or bad days, when it feels like everyone is judging her every move when in reality. ... it is always .. all in her head. 

and she is mostly in her head. she creates fantasies of her life, relationships platonic and romantic and as a result, nothing ever seems to measure up. she feels secure in her fantasies but oftentimes when it hits her that they are just that, fantasies, she ... feels really alone. 

will trip over her own feet . has like 5 bruises from washing the dishes </3

she works as a part of a product design team in a big company.. probably has the knowledge to move up the tier but does not have the courage to stand up for herself . she doesnt believe in herself and is kind of a pessimist .......  

got high one night and decided she wants to start an uber ....... only for women. but doesnt think its a good ide a (its a good idea. id like to think in 10 years time ... bitch made it) 

really weird. likes eating broad beans and frozen strawberries .. will literally eat a lemon. 

she will have different interests every week but never seems to be any good at anything ???????????? makes her sad. 

claims tidying up with marie kondo changed her life LAKJDSKLDJ

*draws curtains* anybody else tired? 

[luisneer]

selected tweets 2016-17

These are tweets from my first @luisneer twitter account. Recently I made a new twitter account with the same username, after having deleted my account and having been without twitter for several months. These tweets are from August 2016 to March 2017, which was most of my first year of college at Shepherd University, in Shepherdstown, West Virginia. I don't go to Shepherd anymore; I transferred to West Virginia University, in Morgantown, WV, after my second semester. My tweets from late March 2017 to [July or August] 2017, when I deleted my twitter, were not archived. 

I'm creating this blog post so the world will have access to some of my tweets from the deleted @luisneer, in case they have any merit as literature. I'm still not sure if I will continue to use twitter in 2018/the future. Usually when I use twitter I feel like I'm actually wanting to be doing something else, but I don't know what; or wanting to be using "another app" that doesn't exist. Twitter generally seems bad for me. Questions about my tweets August 2016-March 2017 can be directed at luisneer@gmail.com. Thank you

    2016

   morgantown has ~48 vape shops

 **morgantown has ~480 vape shops

 siri has werner herzog-like inflections

 considering changing outfits when i take several walks in one day (so nobody thinks im a serial killer, stalker, spy, alien)

 think i remember ~5% of things i said today

 imagined vague connection btwn 'vitamin d' and 'reptar'

 felt distinctly that i was a monkey or chimpanzee while crouching in the corner of my dorm room eating peanuts out of a jar

 just thought (as a request to my mom) 'fax me my skateboard...'

 looked at toilet in bathroom stall with expression of 'utter terror' for what felt like ~15 seconds while it flushed

 listening to bright eyes with headphones at house show

 feel that the toothpaste i use is advancing decay of my teeth

 feel 100% certain that i could train myself to use telepathy to operate my phone during classes

 enjoying the sensation of my right leg 'falling asleep' during psychology class (left foot is also 'asleep')

 felt 'sociopathic' after eye contact w library worker who watched me pick up & pocket a pair of apple headphones someone had left on a chair

 left stolen apple headphones on gray bench across the street from my dorm

 repeatedly placed/removed sunglasses while walking in hallway

 strong desire to remove all positive patterns from my life and perpetuate/embrace all negative ones

 feel that my laptop 'knows' which parts of its screen im looking at

 in winchester, VA

 thought of my own music as having 'no compelling audible elements'

 thought of myself as being legally named 'the fuck up', then couldnt remember my actual name

 successfully, i feel, duplicated 'sociopath facial expression' during eye contact with arch-nemesis in stairwell

 ive taken 13800mg ibuprofen since i got to college

 feel compelled to ask my 9 yr old brother for advice re 'college-level' personal issues

 feel smart after sitting on couch in painting studio + reading art magazines for 2 hours

 persistent notion that 100% of students at my college personally hate me

 psychology professor muttered something like 'scary snake... endocrine system...'

 feeling heavily drugged/sedated in psych class

 psych professor seems obsessed with/terrified by snakes

 imagined kanye smoking crystal meth and tweeting something like 'please help me... cant feel mouth... need help'

 saw a moth at open mic, thought about god

 experiencing difficulty trying to smile

 enjoying using numerous cliches ('the case is closed', 'taking a step back', 'harsh realities') in an essay

 intrigued by conversation i had 9 hrs ago w/ 2 boys who countered my tone (calm, eloquent) exactly by being loud and rude in a friendly way

 felt simultaneously really cute and really lonely while giggling with my mouth closed in french class

 imagined kanye inventing the word 'compactualize' and using it in a sentence during a televised interview

 enjoyed 8-sentence john updike bio in norton lit anthology

 perceived person standing outside bathroom stall occupied by me could 'sense', via something like echolocation, that i was/am depressed

 spoke to french professor in what felt like a distinct persona/alternate luis neer called 'marge simpson voice' luis neer

 feel confidently that the public debut of 'marge simpson voice' luis neer was a success

 feel that 'marge simpson voice' luis neer is the culmination of an unconscious process that initiated in my mind maybe 3-5 years ago

 i want to identify/analyze additional alternate luis neers

 i dont like videos

 i came to college and got weirder, better at writing, more arrogant, more defeated, more sensible

 simultaneously feel that i should run 3 miles and that, at this moment, i would be incapable of running any distance

 feel urged to draw new attention to my 'marge simpson voice' tweets

 huge power outage at shepherd lol

 realized theres no such thing as a 'nation'

 remembered ive blown off obligations to several people, not just one person, so my irresponsibility doesnt 'have a focus', felt comforted

 feel that my follower count is 'crystallized' / will never increase or decrease ever again

 struggled to convert 'stick-and-poke' to past tense during conversation in line at sheetz

 feel it would be pleasurable to take a donut + bottle of coca-cola from this sheetz via armed robbery

 crossed busy road, felt really surprised i didnt get hit by a car, also i wasnt wearing glasses, was walking to sheetz, bought an icee

 laughed alone in my dorm thinking that i should print out a picture of barack obama to put on my wall

 drank from separate glasses containing soymilk, coffee, iced coffee, apple juice, cranberry juice, water, sprite for dinner/breakfas

 just thought 'from adorno to zizek' sans context while shitting

 opened gmail, emailed my father, closed gmail, opened gmail again, viewed email to my father, forwarded it to myself

 'camcorder' would be a good band name

 i thought arnold palmer had already died

 willem dafoe doesnt make me uncomfortable

 i want to stop being mean

 i hate bfs but i want to be someones bf

 wishing i was in a car with friends and no cellular service

 tangled up in myself and others

 twin peaks is depicted as a small town but its population is greater than that of every city in west virginia including the state capital

 eating shark

 thought of my own intelligence as 'frightening'

 thought while walking to class that ginger ale should be made public domain

 had the stitches on my chin removed today, touched the scar tissue for the first time

 i miss being in therapy

 i love carpet

 i love carpet !!

 just thought about my own tweets and lol'd

 mood lately very fragile

 this is what i get for staying up til 5 am

 all night i've felt a wave of dread swelling up, now it's really hitting me

 sound of laughter in public still frightening + unnerving

 my instinct for when to unfriend people on facebook has adapted so that i unfriend people over statuses that make me feel no emotions at all

 fuck, im feeling so much terror

 gucci mane was born 3 days before conor oberst

 the other day i mentioned that i was a poet and this vape guy interrupted me to say "and you didnt know it" and i went fucking nuclear

 interacted with mailman who was picking up mail as i was trying to mail chapbooks, he didnt notice at first that i was talking to him

 what if old people have secrets

 my dad is making me root for a football team but im in pain emotionally

 i feel guilty in general

 thought of my poem "portrait of a nation without any people" as the "lead single" for my full length; it appeared in potluck 14 months ago

 im close friends with satan rn

 feel like travis scott never intended for people to spell his name with a $

 from now on every time i get honey on something ill list the thing in this thread

 finger

 desk

 coffee cup exterior

 pajama pants

 knee

 carpet

 chin

 phone

 shirt

 shoe

 thought that my elderly geography prof. moves by "shuffling"

 feeling shorter, broader

 the only part of the new bright eyes box set i want is the booklet

 is there a booklet? i know there are nvr b4 sn photos

 the song "lime tree" came to conor oberst in a dream

 i like citing things in MLA

 i write essays by pretending im werner herzog

 doesnt seem to be getting later

 lit professor gave my project (sequence of 6 sonnets) a C, i wish she would have gotten me expelled, shelley + ginsberg both were expelled

 heard someone in another room ask "where's wal-mart?" as if wal-mart were a person whose location could change

 i think i just swallowed a filling while eating popcorn, i am very scared, please help

 crazy how things get worse

 there are people on my floor having tons of fun and im upset

 bit my mattress while sitting in the chair next to my bed

 weird that chance the rapper only has 2.4 million followers when he's sort of one of the most famous artists in the world rn

 also weird that donald trump has made 34,000 tweets, seems like an incredibly large number

 the strangeness of yesterday was, for me, augmented by people on the internet talking about a tv show that ive never seen or heard about

 the sunlight is obscene

 im so upset about the sun being so bright im afraid to go outside

 im glad im the only poet who likes trailer park boys

 i slept in a blanket fort under my bed and havent left it all day

 yr = your ur = you're

 my favorite things are pdfs

 now that ive adapted my living space to allow me to never leave my blanket fort i feel like my roommate, omar, exists in a parallel universe

 i hear him but i never see him

 i love latte art, i drink many lattes

 thought that twitter "isn't worth it" in an upset tone while drinking mtn dew

 felt pleasant considering uniqueness of all parent-offspring relationships

 went through my closet + made sure all shirts and jackets were zipped/buttoned

 my blanket is generating flashes of light from static electricity

 record store guy became visibly sick of me several months ago; feel a little guilty every time i enter his store to spend money

 i prefer EPs

 felt "out of control" walking downhill listening to dead kennedys with headphones

 writing an essay is difficult because idk how much relevant information other people have already considered / moved on from

 have been wanting to write at least one poem inside my blanket fort but i don't think it's going to happen, i don't know why

 the internet isn't big enough

 usually when i think "i dont understand the uproar about [event]" i realize there is no "uproar"

 "uproar" is media's way of manipulating the public spotlight and distracting people from important tasks

 feeling helpless + melancholy after dying 15 times and killing 2 stormtroopers in star wars battlefront

 the only way to attain conor oberst-level emo hair is to lay in bed and sob for hours

 i'm sad

 my mom was confused when i told her my first book comes out today

 was luis neer in odd future

 thought "sometimes i just want to end it and start all over" in an exasperated tone re my goodreads account

 becoming increasingly convinced it would be best for me personally to take myself extremely seriously/never joke about myself

 thinking that my tweets would seem terrible if i were a senator/governor/other politician

 imagined doomsday device for future @starwars movies: the "death train," a normal train that exists in space and destroys planets

 how does anyone do it

 in science fiction movies, spacecraft usually look like shopping malls

 everyone in the world is high except me

 feel like i want to have poems published immediately

 having delusions of grandeur

 im sitting on my record player

 my most-used word in 2016 was "bleak"

 prepared and ate garbanzo beans w a lot of rosemart at 2:00 AM

 my brother has a friend over and is being mean to the friend

 all i want for christmas is to never cheer up, ever

 watching eyes wide shut and hugging duckuc

 my nose feels like it's going to bleed

 im sad because every bf looks like me

 getting better at eating ice cream by punching it with my tongue

 the internet is too freaky...

 i think 2017 will be a year of realizing things

 im watching the angry birds movie

 the angry birds movie is so shitty... why was it made...

 ive never had a new years kiss

   2017

   im weird

 eating medicinal ice cream

 im not going to do any drugs in 2017

 made a medicinal phone call

 i want to drink some blood

 i dreamed that roger ebert wrote a negative review of life after ppl and called it "liner notes"

 years dont kill people

 feel inexplicably/explicably really scared about the future of my poetry career

 i've felt stoned since i was a baby

 downloading google earth

 made eye contact in starbucks with possible luis neer incarnation from ~50 years in future; bon jovi "dead or alive" played through speakers

 realised that at some point in the future i will become extremely interested in watching football

 i recommend reading poems extremely slowly while touching the text with your middle finger/index finger

 experiencing cognitive dissonance

 used phonetic clues to correctly predict meaning of & use the word "tandem" while discoursing with myself internally

 i miss steel pedal guitar sounds on conor oberst songs

 my previous incarnation "college luis neer" has evolved to become "high school luis neer-like luis neer in college setting"

 thought "man, i got to stop caring what people think about me" in an emphatic tone that seemed confusing/interesting

 mediocore

 beyonce is cool i think

 i want to re-read "v for vendetta" and to not tweet about it

 remembered that i own a pinata

 i will be at awp

 how could i make twitter a better place

 i saw 4 people wearing yeezys in dc this weekend

 feeling increasingly self-conscious about how much i use the phrase "in the world" or refer to "the world" in poems

 felt robot-like while attaching detachable headphones cord to my headphones while wearing the headphones

 watching shepherd univ lacrosse team practice from "safety of" student center

 i invented releasing two chapbooks in one day

 im dumber than me

 reasoned mentally that im more likely to produce accurate drawings of myself because "i basically look like a bird, so i just draw a bird"

 i want to have a "fake tweet" (e.g. a simple phrase) to tweet repeatedly every time i feel urged to tweet an uninformed/unimportant opinion

 my fake tweet for the foreseeable future will be "i dropped my textbook in the stairwell". when i tweet this it means i have an opinion

 i dropped my textbook in the stairwell

 does anyone remember the chapter of "the hobbit" where bilbo avoids starvation by ingesting peanut butter, honey, cherry nyquil, and water

 sensed that all my college friends just simultaneously shifted from having vague/non-serious negative feelings about me to hating me

 resulting from continuous building of irrepressible/inevitable conjecture in the friends' conscious thoughts

 eating chicken and squash

 i click on 100% of poetry links tweeted by poets i follow

 when i was writing Waves i was obsessed with waves (e.g. energy waves, frequencies) and used the word "waves" at least ~10 times every day

 i dropped my textbook in the stairwell

 white nike swooshes on shoes of boy in library look vibrant/magical

 terrified of being cool

 walked to library really slowly while listening to noise music through big headphones

 i was really, really yung when i started publishing and i'm still really yung

 2 chainz always looks like he's walking in an airport

 i have 5 twitters

 i didnt know what bill paxton looked like, i was thinking RIP gene hackman

 why doesnt anyone blog about me

 thesis statements arent real

 thinking about my book

 i deleted both my tumblrs by accident

 sad about my tumblr

 my name is all over the internet

 im a lizard

 someday there'll be no more ppl

 a lot of conor oberst song titles have parentheses

 feeling sad about the actions of my clone, who passed away

 idk how to use venmo or what it is

 present-day tumblr is like the end of the never ending story where atreyu is talking with the rock biter and the nothing is swirling around

 when someone, anyone, is upset with me im afraid im going to be assassinated

 the views-era apple music ads that depict drake working hard in the studio have really affected and inspired me

 on tumblr i have 4 followers

 almost all of my tweets seem unimportant

 feel that if someone told me that one of my tweets made them upset i would just apologize and delete it

 ground control to commander venus

 i like my new tumblr

 i would be wearing a cardigan rn but i dont have one

 feel that i will continue to generate bright eyes-related content throughout my life

 is everything ok

 i look like michael moore