#if you put color of the sky in anything other than lawful evil…….blocked

[sarcastic-clapping]

for your consideration:

Help me fill this

[ink-beneath-her-fingernails]

BNHA/MHA First Watch-Through Notes

1x01

these are... stupid... and... a mess. bc I am stupid and a mess. you have had your warning. I didn’t even go back and skim through this when I was done I’m just releasing these little bastard thoughts into the void they’re not my problem now

I’m watching dubbed btw

I know, I know... it’s the only one I have access to rn tho

I... do not know how to feel about funimation’s new intro?

well I guess it’s not really new but

listen I haven’t watched anything of funimation’s since the og fruits basket ok I’m used to the DUN-DUN *funimation* ((....you should be watching))

he is. babie. green babie.

but also why do these small children have such wild hair colors

I mean I’m here for it

I just wasn’t expecting it

oH SHIT THEY GOT POWERS POWERS

so this is the famous deku

I’m guessing this is like a flashback or memory or something?

I missed the bully’s name

speaking of the bullies, they changed order? It was wings, fire, stretchy hands, but now it’s fire, stretchy hands, wings. I know that they probably wanted to show the “leader” closest and that’s why but,,

also wtf?? these are kids. like bullies should not be a thing, I think we can all agree on that, but yeah, it’s gonna happen. but these kids are, what? eight? nine? maybe their powers (’quirks,’ whatever) aren’t super powerful yet, but this blonde kid has fire powers. has nobody talked to them about just how dangerous this is? forget roughing the other two up or intimidating them or giving them a hard time, this could genuinely escalate and get way out of hand super fast, and someone could get seriously injured.

oof. boy is dead.

this eight year old (purple hair) sounds like he’s a thirty yo new teacher trying to sound hip and cool but also wise and knowing to his class who Does Not Care

OH

that wasn’t purple kid?? that was current deku???

wack

then this fourteen year old sounds like he’s a thirty yo new teacher trying to sound hip and cool but also wise and knowing to his class who Does Not Care

also they were four?

jeepers heckin criminey who starts beating people up at four years old

have to say though, I loved that sky-to-puddle transition

jiminey fucking crickets I’m not even a minute into the episode these notes are going to be stupidly long I’m sorry

!! I love his little skipping-dance thing when he’s impatient at the crosswalk!

alright... I’ll admit it... his character design is pretty adorable

also tf is that thing

it looks half shark half poorly drawn dog

I mean I get it’s probably a person and that’s their quirk or whatever but

did this kid just run all the way across the city just to watch this guy start shit at the station so he could see the heroes take him down??

I mean respect tbh but also priorities kid

also I really appreciate that the cops are just kind of calmly directing everyone and everyone else is just kind of chillin like “oh. another villain. that’s too bad.” like tbh that’s one of the things that always kind of annoys me about movies and shows like this where there’s like repeatedly villain attacks because yes they are scary, especially when you’re caught up in them, but if you’re just kind of there and not directly in the action or being directly threatened, then why are you freaking out? you’ve lived in this city for how long? there’s an attack every, what, two days? this isn’t routine for you by now?

I started this like 15 min ago and am only like a minute and a half into the ep smh

ngl this intro kinda pops off

that hero guy seemed... kind of evil lookin tho

love the animation oml

also the lyrics to this are great???

OH IS THAT A NARRATIVE FOIL I SEE IMPLIED THERE

I THINK IT IS

“and they were narrative foils” “oh my god they were narrative foils”

k ngl rewinding real quick bc I missed some of the intro and there’s always so much fun stuff to see and unpack in those

also I wanna read all the lyrics

k so I was wondering this before but I’m just gonna say it... why does the hero guy have rabbit ears

alright character designs lookin p fire so far

last guy I keep missing but he kind of looks like steven universe?? idk I still have to watch that show too tbh so,,,

does the big hero guy turn into a giant bird?

oh that intro got me excited for this

these characters look so lit!!

“the first incident?” so this isn’t just like a natural factor of their world? it hasn’t always been going on? there was, like, a definitive start to it all? was that kid really the first incident or the first one they noticed? was that actually the first incident or is it just like the commonly told first incident, like an old myth/legend/folktale/old wive’s tale?

interesting that it started with a baby and then moved to people of all ages?

oh they don’t know the cause of the quirks? interesting

((why do I feel like finding out the answer to that is gonna be like A Big Thing™ at some point in the series))

I really like the visuals they put with this exposition?? idk why it’s just,,, very appealing

also his voice is very nice to listen to tbh, so that’s a definite plus

I hate it when the main character’s voice is super annoying

but like how long ago was it that this started? he just said “before long”

I like that in this universe they actually acknowledge that hey comic books are a thing and this whole superheroes/villains/powers thing is kind of ridiculous bc it’s legit like playing out scenes straight from those comic books but also this is real life and it’s actually happening and really does pose a lot of danger and complications to a lot of people, so we’re going to treat it as something real and serious and affecting us

I might’ve spoken too soon but I really hope they don’t blow that mindset

I feel like too often superhero shows/movies just either completely gloss over the effects this stuff has on society as a whole, or it’s like a completely new thing for them, like there’s never been the concept of a fictional superhero or a comic book there before.

“was an age of heroes”??? oh no what happens

k but why is this guy dressed like the ‘do not cross’ lines

kind of a lame hero costume tbh :/

why. does he have. sleeves. but no shirt.

edna mode would never do you like that honey go see her

“Death Arms”?? what kind of alias is that?? also wouldn’t it make more sense for arms to be uncovered than his chest, then??

“The Punching Hero”

I’m sorry I Cannot take this guy seriously

waterbending??

asdkfdls idk why but this firehose guy really reminds me of that one alchemist from fmab with the top hat and the monocle and the peg leg that spun like a top and Scar murked

“rescue specialist” see?? that makes sense!! it makes me so happy that they’re actually thinking more about the worldbuilding and how dangerous scenarios would work if 80% of the population had powers of different kinds, beyond “big bad guy meet big good guy. punch punch good guy wins”

also dear god thank you for putting someone on crowd control I know I was just saying it was great these people weren’t really treating this like the end of the world and it is good that they were mostly staying back by themselves but. they were still standing very close to an ongoing fight. priorities, people. self preservation. they are things. that I do not believe most people in superhero universes have in the slightest.

aww he’s too short

(but is he shorter than edward elric)

((do we know))

(((somebody please tell me if this information is available)))

alsdfkj l;a that guy calling in late bc the train got held up by the villain... do you think that’s another equivalent of “oh...I’m...sick... yeah, totally, I’m sick” and “my dog ate my homework” to them? “there was a villain attack” or “some idiot on my block decided to show off their quirk and it got out of hand”

ope Big Hero™ is here

...why am I surprised that they have fans?? I mean I guess that makes sense they’re basically celebrities and public figures right?

okay Big Hero™ is Kamui got it

wait no that is not the Big Hero™

but they are another hero and their name is Kamui got it

“Kamui Woods” ok that’s actually helpful I was gonna ask what his skin was supposed to be bc I didn’t think it was scales and it does look kind of like bark... Now going to take that as permission to assume it’s the latter

kamui kind of reminds me of some pokemon but I’m not sure which one?? I’m sorry idk pokemon v well but thy def remind me of one of them

“...a fAnBOY” he looks and sounds like he just tricked someone into confessing to murder why is he so smug about that smh

you know what. speaking of. I don’t get why everyone views being a fan of something/someone as something to be embarrassed or ashamed about?? why do people make fun of other people for it? why do we treat it like some big dark secret we try to hide? when did liking something become a bad thing? like?? sorry I have hobbies and interests and you don’t? sorry I think this person is talented? sorry I thought this book was life-changing? sorry I listen to this album so much because it’s good? sorry this show made me laugh during a really rough time? like goddamn it’s nobody’s business what you like unless you’re trying to force it on you when you’ve asked them to stop or it’s hurting someone? if they’re being safe and respectful about it for everyone involved then there shouldn’t be a problem? stop making people feel like freaks or be scared to enjoy something just a little too much? just let people have good things in life and consume the media that makes them happy? it has little to no effect on you? I don’t get why it’s you’re problem?? sorry to get all soapboxy this is something that’s always really annoyed me

does kamui have flowers on their belt

icon

k but isn’t wood like... really easy to break tho

I mean... comparatively speaking?

“illegal use of powers during rush hour traffic” alsfjsadlkf

wait so he’s listing charges for the guy, does that mean heroes are officially licensed here and can actually arrest people? and... actually work with law enforcement?? gasp no wait but I thought that was impossible except for The One Officer On The Inside That The Hero Has Convinced Of Their Cause™

hold up... “assault, robbery, and illegal use of powers during rush hour traffic... you are the incarnation of evil” ...bro chill lmao

I mean those aren’t good things but,,,, buddy “evil” can get so much worse holy shit sunflower child has no idea what’s in store for them

the show can do a hell of a lot even if they decide not to go that dark

well deku did say he was new

also off topic but I just looked it up and DEKU IS HALF A FOOT TALLER THAN ED

I’M SORRY BUT THAT’S HILARIOUS

CAN YOU IMAGINE THIS EXCITED GREEN CHILD MEETING ED THE GREMLIN ELRIC AND JUST TOWERING OVER HIM

he’d probably get along well w al though so ed would have to like him anyways

ok but back to bnha

ope kamui just got upstaged

but honestly?? he was actin a lil cocky and she seems like a queen so I ain’t mad about it

oh great creeps are everywhere apparently

YES THANK YOU THEY NEED TO INCLUDE SUPERPOWERS IN LEGISLATION SOMEHOW OTHERWISE PEOPLE CAN GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING GEEZ

just. more worldbuilding that I appreciate.

jfc they muzzled him?

ok i wasn’t that mad about kamui being upstaged (idk why I kinda like the guy) but now she’s acting a little too cocky for me and I feel kind of bad for Death Arms and Backdraft (?) because they definitely do deserve at least a little credit

yes. official. overseen by the government. I’m not saying it’s necessarily a good idea bc I’m not getting into the whole mess the MCU basically did regarding that, but it really does add to the worldbuilding and making it seem more realistic/draw you in a little more because you can bet that would be a thing that would actually happen in some capacity if such a large percentage of the population had superpowers, and crime was at an all-time high at the same time, with normal methods without powers likely not doing much to combat that, and it being even harder because everyone’s is different

wow so they really do have roles similar to celebrities huh?

I actually love how he’s analyzing the new hero

that’s!! the good!!! nerdery!!!!

ngl thought that guy was gonna be like “well that’s never gonna happen” lmao glad he didn’t turn out to be an asshole

this guy’s hair and his sweater need an upgrade

I’m sorry honey it’s just not a Look™

I mean ngl I’d probably wear it but also I am the absolute last person to look to for a good idea of fashion so

wow we hate asshole teachers

this kid’s hair grows wtf

they seriously just break out their quirks when they get annoyed?? I mean me too probably but

oh wait he’s not totally an asshole

but that still is kind of a dick move because even if it seems really really likely that most of them do, a lot of them probably feel like that’s just what’s expected of them or that that’s their best bet at an ok life, or they don’t think they’ll actually be able to get a career as a hero, and he has to know that there are kids (or at least one) in his class who don’t have powers and who will probably be shut down at every turn on that career track??

also what is it with the absurd number of people whose hair grows/flys/whatever and whose hands change chape and/or elongate

the girl who just throws up the rock n roll sign is my favorite

also why does this teacher remind me of gilderoy lockhart

I get that his eye thing is part of his quirk... but does he face no consequences health-wise from putting his grubby fingers all over his eyeballs?? you don’t know where your hands have been

ah

the famed bakugo

we finally meet

you seem like a cocky asshole and if I remember correctly you have firepowers

you know who else seemed like cocky assholes and one point or another and had firepowers??

roy mustang and zuko

and one of those guys is an awkward, angry turtleduck, and the other one is a rightly smug bastard who succeeded in pulling a coup on the government who was surveilling him and holding half his team hostage

so yeah I have a feeling I’m gonna like this guy

probably

at some point

eventually

it might take a while

“the only place worthy of me” oh dear

All Might!! Big Hero™ has a name!!

oh being a hero solely bc you want to be rich and popular? lame

aklsdfsjaslkfd teach just callin deku out in front of everyone

r.i.p.

it was nice having you as a main character for eight whole minutes I’m sorry you have to face death-by-embarrassment you deserved better

ope

bakugo doesn’t want anyone stealin his thunder

lemme guess deku is also his Main Rival™ or at least will be

awwwww poor guy

how much you wanna bet he gets the highest scores in all the exams bc he studies the heroes so much and that’s how he gets in

that lady got forcefields for her quirk? damn she lucked out

“this cash is mine” *drops cash*

are all the heroes like fine mt. lady can deal w the guy she keeps stealing all our credit anyway so there’s no point??

....is that all might?

k but... y’all should be taking notes on the heroes too if you want a better chance at that career and better schools for it? I know they’re probably making fun of it bc he doesn’t have a quirk but still

also I find it really interesting that the kids all act like the quirks are absolutely everything but at that scene on the street earlier people were complaining about missing the days they didn’t have to worry about “every rando w a quirk” or something... like maybe it’s because the kids grew up w it? Idk just the difference in mindset between (presumably) generations seems cool to look into

wow we love bullies so much

no we don’t pls stop you’re not as cool as you think you are

DESTROYING SOMEONE’S NOTEBOOK/JOURNAL/SKETCHBOOK IS ONE OF THE MOST DICK MOVES SOMEONE CAN MAKE CHANGE MY MIND

alright bakugo you’ve definitely moved onto my shitlist for the moment

don’t stay there

well you know what they say about greatness... some people are destined for it, yeah, but some become it, and some have it thrust upon them

cliches are there for a reason buddy

and either way... I could be wrong but... there doesn’t seem like anything great or heroic about bullying people... I mean idk that’s just my opinion but

god I hope they eat bakugo alive at ua

deku I know you’re a sunshine child but you have to get in now. you have to. out of pure spite. please.

yeah, friend 1b is right buddy...

destroy him deku

DESTROY THEM DEKU

oh suicide jokes huh

bakugo you’re on thin fucking ice you’ve just moved way up in my shit list

wow I hate him <3

EXACTLY

THANK YOU DEKU

I hate it when shows have someone make a suicide joke like that and just? no one addresses it?? or the characters don’t seem to realize that it needs addressing, at least to themselves??? so this is refreshing

voiced my thoughts exactly

he really is an idiot

NO BUDDY YOUR DREAMS ARE STILL POSSIBLE AND VALID

YOUR NOTES ARE SALVAGEABLE

he really is a jerk deku you’re right

awww little deku is so cute

alright I’m gonna make a prediction

this is his mom right

is this gonna be

another

dead anime mom?

and lemme guess she always told him she was sure he’d be a hero/she knew he’d become one, and then she died, and that’s why he’s so set on it

probably not

but just... placing my bets now

w h a t  is this child doing

he’s a hair’s breadth away from head-desking

are we... just gonna... ignore that robbery that was happening on the street a few minutes ago

OKAY WE GET IT YOU’RE HERE CAN YOU GO BACK TO SAVING PEOPLE THEY’RE STILL IN DANGER

HIS CACKLES I CAN’T

alsdkjf;lsjk I feel bad for him but also,,, that transition was gold

but also the face his mom made before he started laughing... she knew he probably wouldn’t get one didn’t she

but why do they assume it won’t happen if they don’t get it by a certain age? they said after that baby people all around the world were getting powers, and showed people of all different ages when they said so. that implies that they got those powers at those ages, after the baby was born but not when they were children themselves? like yeah there’s probably some point where you’d consider them “aged out” and therefore less likely to get a quirk but... she just said he’s in kindergarten.

fourth generation? so the appearance of quirks isn’t a super recent thing then

they can tell if someone is going to manifest a quirk or is starting to by looking at x-rays?

also I know I’m seriously overusing the word “interesting” but

maybe I’m reading too far into this but it’s also kind of interesting that his father and his (current) main antagonist have such similar powers?

OH!!!! lore drop!! kind of!!! that’s a really interesting (wow there it is again) thing they chose to be an indicator for that kind of thing in this universe

*cue izuku contemplating chopping off his pinky toes*

I feel like... all might’s... not gonna be that great....

DEAR LORD HOW MANY TEARS CAN THIS CHILD HOLD IN HIS EYES

also ngl when little deku’s eyes are wide and he doesn’t move he looks really creepy and kind of like a child-sized doll

like pinocchio

how sure are we that deku isn’t made of wood

hmmmmmmmmm I do love this animation

ah Internal Angst™

the fuck is that laughter??

skin suit? no thanks

but guess we aren’t ignoring that earlier scene

yeah all might’s in the city alright

he’s gonna break this up isn’t he

yepppppp that’s him

idk I think alex louise armstrong did it better sorry bud :/

“texas smash”??

he just... punched liquid apart

this kid’s still gonna go flying and hit the ground hard buddy thanks for your help

oh he stuck around

and he’s not hurt too bad

“justicing”

he’s using the city’s sewer system being difficult to navigate as his excuse for why he wasn’t paying attention to keeping bystanders safe like he “usually” does?

the armstrongs do the sparkle better

a;ldkfsdlfls this is really funny to watch ngl

“that’s... a pretty good point.” yeah no shit lmao

I love how he’s just. awkwardly patting deku.

yeah he’s gonna end up accidentally adopting this kid isn’t he

is he hurt?? or did the other guy actually take him over while deku was unconscious??

nah I think he’s just hurt I’m p sure he really did get the guy

but still

that was... a big boom.... that’s not good

he’s just.... abandoning this kid on the rooftop??

but also he probably really does have to go if blood is coming out of his mouth

do heroes in this universe have secret identities?

I feel like yes but also no??

watch as this guy’s like “I don’t have a quirk either” and he’s just. like. an armstrong or something

that or he’s gonna crush this kid’s dreams and be like “no, it’s not possible” and I will be forced to ensure deku becomes the most successful hero ever out of Even More Pure Spite™ even if he idolizes the guy

oh yeah he’s gonna get his dreams crushed

IS ALL MIGHT GONNA VOUCH FOR HIM AND GET HIM AN OPPORTUNITY AT UA BC HE FEELS BAD FOR HIM

hmm this outro kinda slaps too

overall feelin good, like it so far, definitely think I won’t have trouble continuing watching at least for now

[perogipoj]

all this before coffee

Dedicated to my black sheep family, who will always be golden.

 Barbed wire, blank walls and an empty sky. Cocoa Beach.  Brevard County, FL. Jail.  Also known as SHARPS.  Tammy walked into the classroom with an air of bravado coupled with the eyes of a child. I never met a teacher before she said shyly, glancing at her handcuffs on the uncomfortable chair.  Even … I hesitated, even in school, I asked gently. I adjusted my own hips to adjust for the cold hard beneath me.  I mean, a teacher for real.  Her eyes looked down, and I implored with my eyes this time to the corrections officer to remove the handcuffs.  Her shoulder length hair was marred by black roots and mustard colored ends.  There were scars on her arm from cutting.  Her teeth were perfect when she decided to smile. Opening the GRE materials, I joked that I am useless at math but fairly good at grammar.  Tammy looked beautiful.

 Some of us take many things too far.  That has seemed to be my pattern.  Even healthy habits turned into obsessions.  Jogging turned into running which became marathons and a cruel treatment of my body.  Some can run into their seventies without injury as some people live to a hundred while smoking and drinking whiskey to the end.  Mindful eating became anorexia and bulimia.  Going organic made me broke with the kombucha and hemp that flowed through my veins.  Being tidy led me to compulsive house cleaning, often with bleach scouring my hands and my eyes colored in pink tears.  Personal grooming turned to hours and dollars of hair coloring, clothes I could not afford, Botox, and breast augmentation. Wanting affirmation led to dangerous and toxic sexual situations.  

 Jaylen, I was warned, was “special.”  I would normally groan inward, used to so many parents highlighting their children as such, usually to explain poor grades.   The volunteer walked all twelve years of Jaylen, his mannerisms large and chaotic, into the room in which all toys and colors were removed.  I hate reading, he said, standing with his arms crossed in front of him like a knight.  Why? It’s stupid.  Can you read, I asked, opening the second-grade reader I was given. I don’t need to read, I can dance.

 I met The Peruvian on a last minute, pathetic online date.  I was at a job expo to acquire my first teaching job after finishing my master’s degree at a world-famous university.  I almost flunked out.  I could not focus.  I cried over social histories in German, a language I lacked grammatical skill in, dreading the meetings with just my professor and another grad student. Black tea, discussions of Marx I got lost in, his approval nodding at the stout Russian girl I already had difficulty understanding in English, never mind in German.  In college, I was stellar.  On time to each class, writing papers late into the night with a gusto of my fingers and a smile on my face.  The world looked bright. On a sweltering day with an incompressible and unimportant commencement speaker, we burnt in the sun and passed around a flask of vodka under our graduation gowns.  Life is beginning.  I held the parchment color graduation schedule. My name had a star next to it.

 I saw that Tammy was no longer shackled when she entered the gray room.  Since the week I met with her, she had elevated herself to the trusted inmates who could clean, deliver meals, and hand out the dog-eared pages of books on a squeaky cart.  So, you scored extremely high on many levels, Tammy.  Let’s take a look at the reading comprehension packet I assigned on The Scarlet Letter.  She smiled more brightly.  I pressed her for intrigue. Ma’am, she said glowing, my commissary is so lit now I don’t have to eat the garbage they give us.  They try to pass off expired food when I deliver it.  I wanted to call them out on those pistachios.  I don’t have time to answer these packets you give me. But I read the book.  What did you read, according to you?  We clasped hands.  Of course, the minster got off and Hester had to wear the giant A over her pilgrim costume.  I dipped my head. Of course.  She could read Hawthorne.  

 I will be the gladdest thing

           Under the sun!

I will touch a hundred flowers

           And not pick one.

 I will look at cliffs and clouds

           With quiet eyes,

Watch the wind bow down the grass,

           And the grass rise.

 And when the lights begin to show

           Up from the town,

I will mark which much be mine,

           And then start down.

-          Edna St. Vincent Millay  

 Jaylen came running into the room from the play center and basketball court which I assumed was a courtesy to me.  He needed to get the wiggles out.

 Nassau Point in the summer at Aunt Tillie’s, driving the Long Island Expressway until it ended to countless grey and white mottled roads.  Passing vineyards that used to be potato fields, cramming my mouth with the last bit of contraband Doritos which were called a Special Treat to nullify us on the vast expanse from New Jersey to the tiny white house.  Decorated in “Early American” with a front glass porch smelling oddly pleasant of moth balls and sunlight.  The huge lawn rolling into the bay with a dock that appeared and disappeared with the tide.  Kids took showers in the dank basement, carved out of a space teeming of a hoarder. A crusted bottle of prell shampoo and a withered sliver of ivory soap.  I met Man-Boy With Very Hairy Legs for the first and last time.  Stroking my legs up and down, he asked if I had a boyfriend.  I was ten, and smug that I could run through poison ivy and never get a rash.  Do you want to fool around, like do stuff?  He whispered into my ear everything I did not know yet.  That’s what married people do!  With his laughter, I leapt my long legs and ran, up the hill, to the driveway where my father was shucking corn.  I got away. This time.

 I was so excited to see Tammy.  But she was not in attendance.  I left the CO the beat-up copy of Antigone for her. I never saw Tammy again.  “All men make mistakes, but a good man yields when his course is wrong and repairs the evil.  The only evil is pride.” This quote was for my betterment, not for Tammy’s.

 A time of reckoning, and a time of complete growth.  A time of a schedule not placed by us.  A journey into us through the connection of others, who became best friends.  Vitamin fusions, lining up for medication in ribbed short paper cups, and Group.  Totally released from responsibility, my linens and clothes were washed, returned the same afternoon in compact squares surrounded by plastic wrap.  Jokes of communal constipation. So, this is my brain mapped.  Here is what displays depression, here anxiety, this is insomnia, that part shows a lack of memory and concentration.  What is that big blue of the Pacific Ocean?  She looked at me, clicked her keyboard.  PTSD.  

 I want to draw a Parrot! P-A-R-R-O-T and speak like one! Wordless, I handed him the blue and black expo markers for the old white board.  With precision, he drew the bird.  I need more colors, he explained in one breath can I talk like a parrot.  I smiled at him at led him to his desk. Let’s try to pay attention today, and I will get you more colors and you can show me how a parrot talks. I began my lesson, and his eyes drifted into imagination.  I needed to get him more colors.  

 I told The Peruvian I was pregnant.  Now I can never afford to divorce you he muttered, enraged.  Married two months earlier, I realized our honeymoon baby was not welcome.   The protesters were angry, and I felt sick. Him on his laptop, me crying to a social worker.  Do not sedate me, I plead, I need to feel this sin.  Sliding my shoes off in the car, my trunk grinding with mountain rolls of cramps and uncontrollable sobbing coming from a divine place, I declined lunch in West Palm.  I never want to do anything fun.  Changing my pad alone in a car beneath the ceiling of the parking garage in City Place, I then tilted my head and fell asleep again.  My birthday came and went.  You didn’t remember my birthday.  With that evil glint in his eyes, he turned his head and told me that was because he did not love me.

 I purchased a ream of paper and a new box of 42 colors Crayola, legit, sharpener in the box, for Jaylen.  He immediately sat down and drew and drew.  Can we put some words to these if we use the colors you want?  He looked up at me shyly and wrote down five words from the fifth-grade reader.  How did you know that?  Easy, my Grammy teaches me.

 I did not smoke to fit in. I smoked because it felt good out in the parking lot, vying for shade, with the Tech supplying communal cigarettes and a light.  The wave went through me and my lips burned with the dirt and smoky taste.  You look like Strawberry Shortcake trying to smoke a cigarette!  My mother was a sophisticated Virginia Slims smoker, sitting on the brick steps in her tennis skirt, so beautiful, watching my brother play in the backyard waiting for my father to return from work.  I sat next to her in awe, breathing in the sprinkler water and counting its pattern, hum hum-hum-hum, hum hum-hum-hum.  

 I took a cigarette break on my Uber ride home.  I knew I would not smoke much when I got home.   However, I did not consume much except cigarettes and black coffee.  I felt Parisian.  The house got messy, and my thighs grew softer. Investing only in ponds cold cream and drugstore mascara, I laughed deeper and threw myself into work more than ever, with determined concentration, forgetting my posture, hunched over in zeal working sixty hours a week.   Anxiety attacks did not make my head and hands shake while driving. I binged watched Law and Order.  Being unhealthy never felt so healthy.  

 I called the jail to let them know I am available for other inmates if they needed me.  I went the next day to help a young man learn English as a second language. All went well until he stood up screaming asking for a guard then switching to Spanish.  

 Here is your key, you can find your mailbox in the teacher lounge.  Here is the form to join the union, Mr. Pescatelli will most certainly find you about that.  Do you know what a block schedule is?  In the morning you will be teaching Advanced Placement European History to our magnet students.  After lunch, you have sophomore World History in the fourth wing. The afternoon will have different challenges.  If you ever need assistance, security is just down the hall.  Welcome to Ft. Lauderdale High School.  Welcome to my first year of teaching.  

 …

 I met the Sophisticated Scandinavian Man in Boston in the Spring.  A PhD candidate from a social democracy intrigued me.  I was twenty-two and he was twenty-eight.  I felt like a puppy taken in from the cold.  There is a long story for this, maybe later.  The times in which he devoured me, lavished upon me, he loved a short story I wrote, “All this before coffee.”

 Sonya met me in the prison classroom.  In anticipation of a new student, I posted Jaylen’s parrots, travel posters, pictures of presidents listing their failures before they took office.  Hello, she said, reaching her cuffed wrists out to me.  I am Jaylen’s mother.

 All this before coffee.  All this after a DUI.

[jeanjauthor]

Writers?  This is the artistic version of a short story.

Artists...?

...WHY??

So...many...questions.

A lot of this breaks what writers call “the willing suspension of disbelief.” It’s where the audience is willing to overlook implausible things in order to keep following the story.  At some point their credibility has a limit, a breaking point where their ability to suspend and ignore their disbelief will snap, like hanging a thread from the ceiling, and then putting too much weight on it.

Some of these weighty questions include:

Why is she "standing" like that? She looks like she's sitting on an invisible stool!

Why is her cloak/sheet still bound up like that if she's been fighting long enough to get her sword bloodied?

Why is she so pristine when the wyrm corpse is clearly freshly arterially injured??

Why does she have no shoes and pristine feet when she’s clearly touching a bloody corpse?

Why is the tag end of her cloak/sheet...thing...whipped up under one leg and over the other when she’s been chopping up a monster and now has to fight another one?

Again, why is she so clean??

There are so many WTF questions...

What is she sitting on?

If she’s not sitting on anything, how is she supporting her weight in that position?

She’s not being supported by her feet, that’s for sure--is she seriously en pointe with her left foot (the one on our right, visually)?

And the one on the left (her right foot), if it’s resting at a 45-ish degree angle on a corpse so freshly butchered it’s still spurting, how is it she’s able to keep it in place when it should be slipping out from under her by all the laws of squshy meaty blood-filled things?

Where is the missing V shaped wedge of that tail?  Look at the angles on those two cut ends; there is clearly a whole big fat wedge of flesh that is missing!  If there wasn’t, that tail would literally have been an L shaped structure with the cut angling on the diagonal down into the corner, and that is just disturbing to contemplate...

...Where are the arm bones in those dragon-wings?? Seriously, that is disturbing, seeing the thin metacarpals and phalanges (the “finger bones” of wings if you look at wings as nothing more than elongated & weirdly angled hands) ...but not the arm bones...so where are they??

...Now this isn’t to say the picture is all bad!  The concept is actually a neat idea, looking like a cross of Lord of the Rings meets all those hedonistic Renaissance paintings of the Ancient Greek mythos.  And it would be 100% correct to mix mythos like this, as the Renaissance painters were doing that all over the place, mixing Greek mythos symbology into Biblical art, and vice versa (all of which was fan art, btw).

The streaky effect of the Nazgûl is wonderful, though I’d like to see a bit more tattering (along the same diagonal upper left to lower right lines) on that right side of the Ringwraith fellow, there.

The Ringrwraith even seems to be bending the airwaves around and above him, with the effects of the clouds sort of streaking in toward that bright spot in the sky above and behind.  It makes it look like the halo is sucking in all the Light before fleeing into the West, or trying to suck the Nazgûl  off the face of the planet to hopefully disinterate its evilness out of existence...

The bright part of the sky also kind of looks like dragonbreath fire, even though the Fell Beasts that the Nazgûl rode upon aren’t evern mentioned (as far as I can recall) as being able to breathe fire like dragons.  So that’s another point of coolness.

I have no idea what’s going on anatomy-wise of the presumed fallen and chopped up Fell Beast, but at least some effort has been made to provide it with a (weird) internal structure.  If it really is a Fell Beast and not meant to be a dragon or a wyrm, then I can accept the odd anatomy and darkness of the...I’m not sure if those are bones, but I’m presuming that it has some bones in its tail, and if it’s a foul abomination style creation, I can accept the creator had no clue.

I do like the crispness of the woman in focus versus the Nazgûl who is equally clearly not in focus.

Certainly the woman definitely looks like a Renaissance painting of a Greek Mythos Action Sequence! She’s in a classic serene, poised action pose that no doubt has some sort of supporting stool & armature behind and under the original model for her to rest her arms upon.

The symbology of Shield Maiden of Rohan certainly gets the first two components of that descriptor down visually: for the first part, she has a shield (lovely round thing, very Classic Greek Hero With Spiffy Expensive Metal Shield), and she definitely is using it to shield herself from something. (Plus the sword.)  The other part of the symbology is the “modesty sheet drape” under one thigh (gotta show off them nekkid thighs, Renaissance foiks!!) and up over the other, between the legs, blocking off any view of or access to the mons pubis...aka, shielding her maidenly modesty.

However, there is zero sign she’s from Rohan, because there’s zero symbolism representing Rohirrim culture...and the key element to Renaissance pictures of various cultures’ mythos were that they were rich with symbolism.  The Rohirrim, the Riders of Rohan, were emphasized over and over as horse people.

Tolkienn also cribbed the Scandinavian culture for his descriptions of them (I suspect the Golden Hordes of the Russian Steppes, heavily influenced by the Rus folks who were Scandinavians who had moved east and mingled with the Mongolian Empire remnants who a little earlier had moved west.  The Greeks knew of the Scandinavian peoples (no, really, they knew of them! Electricity is actually just the Latin word elektron (which comes from a similar-sounding Greek word I’m not going to bother to spell correctly), which meant amber, as in the petrified pine pitch being shipped down through Europe from the Baltic Sea in the far north, which is surrounded by Scandinavian countries.

Yet there’s no signs or symbols of Scandinavia about her, no knotwork animals, no amber, just pale blonde hair (which frankly could be representative of the British Isles or partial albinoism)...  So while there’s a lovely Greek Mythos in Renaissance Paintings feel to her...it falls short of being a true copy/homage, which is unfortunate.  It could’ve been so easily fixed, too, with a bit of knotwork braiding painted onto the cloak/sheet thing.

I will say that the folds of that sheet are spectacularly well painted, lovely depth and dimensionality to them!

Same goes for the condours of her body, and the tail of the wyrm.  I fully believe these are three dimensional objects!

The lighting is beautifully done.  Admittedly if the light is coming from that glowy bit of the sky behind the Nazgûl, she should be in shadow...except he’s a Ringwraith, and it’s 100% acceptable for light to go through him, since according to cannon, they’re not fully corporeal.  This is a “plot” point where fans who know the lore are more than willing to suspend disbelief.

I’m not a rabid Tolkienn fan by any means, but I do know enough to accept that Ringwraiths are wraiths, and not fully of the physical realm.  Plus, Greek Mythos Heroes in Renaissance paintings are supposed to be Bathed In The Light Of Holy Goodness, sort of an inner aura spiritual goodness radiance-effect, I guess...?  Either way, it’s symbolism, it indicates visually that the Light (Good) will shine through upon Heroes (& Heroines) when they are being their Most Heroic...and it’s very well done.

(...Another question if that’s her helm on the ground, where is the rest of her armor? Where are her clothes?? Or is this meant to parody the “sword and magic helmet!!” trope and the helmet was providing all her armor and clothes up until the point she removes it to reveal she’s a nekkid Not A Man? And really, are Nazgûl so far removed from their mortal lives that they need nakedness to be able to tell males from females of their own species...?)

If this were a story, it would be a crossover fanfic with awesome potential...but it falls a little short of what’s needed to successfully suspend the reader/viewer’s disbelief.

Why is it important to do a better job next time, to get these details a little more accurate? Because most Tolkienn fans I know are rabid about it, & willing to nitpick any mistakes or inaccuracies. Cast your minds back to the huge raging fandom debates around the Lord of the Rings trilogy movies about whether or not Peter Jackson & co were “butchering the mythos” of Middle Earth.

Also...I’m trying to figure out how the Nazgûl is standing, and on what if he is indeed standing, though perhaps he’s actually astride the fallen Fell Beast, and simply swung himself around while she was chopping off & somehow disintegrating that V-shaped wedge of wrymtail? I can suspend some of my disbelief for that, though it does add to the overall strain of that willing suspension, and obviously there were too many other issues that ended up snapping it.)

As an editor, if this were a story, I’d be telling the artist to fix the wing bones, to give the woman some shining chain armor with a Rohirrim tabard, or boiled leather armor and tabard--at the very least a tabard with the Rohirrim symbols on it!!. I’d also at the very least slap some Scandinavian knotwork on it, if not the actual Horse of Rohan. (I’d also suggest using the accepted colors for the Rohirrim banner, green and gold, though I might keep the majority of the tabard white and just have a gold-and-green knotwork horse centered on the chest, or something.)

I’d also request there be more chunks of hacked-off tail all over. (Bonus points if one of them looks like The Lonely Mountain!  lol...)

Plus, I’d give her at least a tiny bit of blood spatters around her boots and on her thighs & a little on the lower tabard, to show she’s been fighting in battle all along.  However, I’d actually hesitate to put the spatters any higher than belt-line at most (and definitely do something different than that cloak/sheet thing).

Why would I hesitate to get the chest area bloody? Because of the symbolism.

Renaissance paintings had blood & gore, but only up to a point.  She’s the heroic figure who slays the 3rd Biggest Nasty of the entire trilogy (#1: Sauron, #2 Saruman, #3 chief king of the Ringwraiths, the one she stabs in the face-hole), so she needs the symbolism of still being Clean And Pure Of Heart, aka no muss, mud, tatters, or blood in the torso (chest / heart) area.

In fact, if you just replaced the cloak/sheet thingy with just a tabard (a white one with a little knotwork on it, and put Grecian sandals on her feet...that would seriously fix a lot in this image.  You’d still get to paint the glorious three dimensional folds arrowing down between her thighs, “shielding her modesty.” and you could put some of the symbols of Rohan on the tabard (horse, knotwork, etc) to make her more clearly the Shield Maiden of Rohan, and not just a shield maiden, while still retaining that Greek Mythos feel.

(Plus, you could have a bit of Side Boob showing on the side closest to the viewer to make it clear She Is No Man, and still avoid the blasted censorship issues rampant in modern society, particularly on this site these days.)

...Definitely fix the dragon wing armbones with a bit of shadowing to remove the fact they look like they’re translucent with nothing along the upper/leading edge... ‘cause once unseen, I cannot un-see-it, and it’s creepy as-is...  >.>*

I love the color palette. It’s very dusky, as in nearing-sunset-dusk, with lots of earth tones.  It looks a bit dirty in its hues (as tragically poised battlefields should), and yet it has kind of a “Romanticism golden afternoon light” quality to it. These are all colors that I 100% believe Renaissance painters had access to and would’ve used.  Excellent choices!

At a quick glance, it’s a good painting.  When you look at it a little closer, however... the contrast between all the high quality stuff (lighting, three-dimensionality, focus versus unfocus, at least half the necessary symbolism is there, etc, etc) and the lower quality stuff (oy that lack of proper dragonwing armbones, etc) means it’s really not quite the artist’s best work, and it could be so, so very much better.  Why?

Composition is as important as technical performance.

Seriously, the way she’s painted is gloriously done...except for her positioning.  The dragon wings (I haven’t even touched on the odd angles of the metacarpal bones on the left-side one, just the right one, which is well done for the “finger bones” but there’s no way it should be pointing up lke that), those wings are too anatomically implausible, though I’ll admit they’re more about visual framing than being actual key features.

And lastly, if you’re going for a glorious Greek Mythos Renaissance Painting look to the art...go the whole hog.  Paint it like it’s Second Breakfast, Elevenses, Lunch, Dinner, Tiffin, Tea, Supper & Midnight Snack all rolled into one. 

Hell, paint a Loyal Dog (a staple of Renaissance symbolism), put it down at her feet (to represent the hobbit Merry, who was with her on her quests), and give it a little Rohirrim helmet and/or tabard!  Go the whole distance with this.  I truly believe this artist has that kind of quality in them!

If they did, I do believe all the old Renaissance Masters would totally thumbs-up this painting, if those flaws were fixed and the symbolism ramped up to at least a 9, if not necessarily a 10, rather than just doodling around down near a 5 or 6.

If this were a story and I was the editor for it (and presuming this was done on a tablet / computer, since if it’s an actual painting, that’s harder to fix), I’d definitely strongly suggest the revisions and rewrites listed above.  And then I’d pimp the hell outta this painting.

(Oh, and to fix the weird positioning of her body, I’d give her a Radiant Aura Of Goodness with some golden streaks of light or something angling out at all directions, so it looks like she’s kinda floating, rather than wondering if she’s “suspended” by secretly sitting on a stick or a tail spike or something.  That would help strengthen my suspension...as in the suspension of my disbelief.)

[keywestlou]

BROADWAY LEGEND CAROL CHANNING PASSES ON

Carol Channing died thursday at age 97. A great talent taken from us. To spend eternity as a brilliant diamond in the night sky.

Channing won 4 Tony awards. The first for Hello Dolly! She was the original Dolly Levi.

I was fortunate to have seen her on Broadway in Hello Dolly! An inspiring performance.

Even more of a thrill was seeing her perform in Key West sometime in the mid 1990’s.

My wife and I were staying at the Sheraton Suites. A perfection location. A suite, great pool, good food, and Smathers Beach across the street. All for $85 a night!

We were heading out for Duval one evening when we heard this great singing. I immediately recognized it as Carol Channing. Went outside to the pool and there she was! Blowing everyone out with her unique singing voice!

The chaise lounges had been removed. Tables set up with white table clothes and candles. Everyone dressed. She was probably doing a special appearance at some corporate function.

My wife and I headed over to the pool bar. Open to he public, though not many seated there. Grabbed 2 stools, ordered drinks, and watched her perform.

The beauty of it all was that Channing’s microphone and the spot from which she was performing was all of 5 feet from us!

We never made Duval. The best of everything was at Sheraton Suites that evening.

Never left the house yesterday. Spent the day finalizing my podcast show Tuesday Talk with Key west Lou.

Show went unusually well.The reason great topics. A crazy week. What with the shutdown, Barr’s testimony, tariff wars, opioid crisis, how Trump’s attorney fees are being paid, etc. Plus the touching video/story of the 11 year old baby who heard for the first time.

Sleeping after the show a problem. I get so worked up while doing the half hour show that I do not sleep tuesday nights. I will nap all afternoon today to compensate.

American society is upside down in many ways. One is criminal sentencing. We are all aware.

Let me provide you with an example that is stomach turning. Two police officers involved in child porn getting off with light sentences.

Dean Worthington a sergeant with the Columbus, Ohio police department. He was caught participating in and contributing to a child pornography ring. Children engaged in sex acts with adults.

Charged with 4 counts. Plead guilty. Received a 90 day sentence.

El Paso Deputy Sheriff Donald Fair even worse. He got no time. His crime involved sexually exhibiting a young boy, creating child porn, and exhibiting the porn on the internet.

Ten years probation his punishment.

On yesterday’s date in 2009, Sully Sulenberg made history. He will be remembered for all time.

A U.S. Airways pilot, his Airbus 320 had just left LaGuardia Airport. A bunch of birds blew his engines. He could not return to the airport. He put the plane down on the Hudson River without the loss of one life.

A miracle on the Hudson.

We have heard of tsunamis and water floods taking many lives. Only once a molasses flood.

It was 1919. The place a plant in Boston. The plant used crude molasses in what ever it processed. A 58 foot tank was in the plant’s building loaded with crude molasses. 2.5 million gallons worth.

The tank exploded. An 8 foot wave shot out. Swept away inside parts of the plant building including walls and doors. Made its way to the street. Pushed over beams holding tracks for elevated trains.

Twenty one persons killed, many more injured, huge property damage.

More than 100 lawsuits resulted. A special auditor appointed. Total settlements $1 million. A lot of money in 1919.

William Barr. Trump’s nominee for Attorney General. Testified before the Senate Judiciary Committee yesterday.

My impressions and comments. May be a bit long.

Barr is 68. Retired. Was Attorney General under Bush 41. Attorney General during the Iran-Contra affair. Reagan was President during the “wrong doing.” Bush’s name came up in the investigation while he was President for something that occurred while he was Vice-President.

Barr distinguished appearing. Preppy. Horn rimmed glasses. Right out of the 1980’s.

I did not like his testimony.

Ask first, why would a retired man want to go back to the Washington swamp in his senior years? Not for money. What else, if anything? Think about it.

Two points in his testimony bothered me.

He agreed he would permit Mueller to complete the investigation. Fine. However, he wanot sure whether he would make all, a part, or none of Mueller’s report available to the public or Congress. He claimed it was his decision to make under the special counsel law.

He was correct in that regard. However after the time and importance involved, one hundred percent transparency is required. The people not only have a right to know, they need to know.

Then there is the issue of recusal. Last year, Barr wrote a 19 page report explaining Presidential supremacy as regards investigations and that a President because of it could neither be impeached nor removed from office.

Barr claims the report was unsolicited and he wrote it merely to express his feelings at the time. He also stated it was being misinterpreted and did not reflect what I have set forth in the previous paragraph.

Jeff Sessions recused himself. Barr should also. Barr said not necessarily in effect. He would submit the situation to the Ethics Committee. If the Ethics Committee said he should recuse himself, he would not. His reason being that he considered recusal to be his alone to make.

Some other parts of his testimony bothered me.

He praised Sessions for how he handled the border problem and the issues it raised. Suggested he concurred in removing children from parents.

He claimed thousands were coming over the border. Totally factually inaccurate.

He is for a “barrier.” Did not say wall.

As to voter suppression, he has a concern. Problem is the concern did not appear with people of color and the poor who were finding it increasingly difficult to vote. His concern was for those purportedly voting illegally. Like blocks of votes showing up in a district in excess of the number of people eligible to vote.

My gut feeling is that under Barr, the Mueller investigation will have been a waste. Its pertinent parts will never see the light of day.

My friends, we are losing our government!

Not done with the Barr issue yet.

The United Stats is a nation of laws, not men. It is the underlying principle of the American legal and political system.

Trump and those who support him do not believe in a government of laws. Believe power in the people (certain persons) controlling. Trump himself an example.

Such a group becomes a “ruling class.” Hopefully to be followed in time by a transformation to an “aristocracy.”

John Adams strongly supported and proclaimed the U.S. was a nation of laws and not people. He saw the evils of an aristocracy. He said “aristocracy is a monster to be chained.”

I believe Barr leans towards ruling class as opposed to a nation of laws.

When he was Attorney General under Bush, Barr is reported to have said to Bush: “I’ve had an itchy finger.”

When the Iran Contra problem reared its ugly head as concerned Bush, Barr was for firing special counsel Larry Walsh. Shades of the night Nixon wanted to fire the special prosecutor.

The problem with the Barr nomination is that it is a refection of what is happening to our country. The rich have tried for 50 or more years to take over. To become a nation of people rather than laws. They have succeeded with the Supreme Court. Succeeded with Trump.

They are marching ahead to victory. Unless those who believe in the basics of American democracy take a stand as strong as the ruling class have and oppose this affront to our way of life.

Sorry for being so long winded on this issue.

Enjoy your day!

BROADWAY LEGEND CAROL CHANNING PASSES ON was originally published on Key West Lou