#if you don't write olu channeling a very tired shift manager at mcdonald's when dealing with stede

[pearwaldorf]

Sorta instigated by @blakbonnet 😘

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“Olu, can I ask you a question?” Stede has that very solemn, earnest look about him, the one Oluwande has learned will lead to either the deepening of a connection or oversharing and irreparable psychic damage. He never knows which. 

“Sure.” He takes a sip from his water bottle.

“What’s a ‘zaddy’?” 

Olu didn’t think spit takes were actually a thing until he saw water all over the table. He grabs a towel and cleans up the mess, if only so he doesn’t have to answer Stede immediately. 

“Um, well. Do you know what a daddy is?” He prays he doesn’t have to explain this to Stede too.

“I’m assuming this is not about having sired children?” Well, it’s a start.

“That’s a DILF, it’s not the same thing!” Archie calls from where she’s sweeping the floor. 

“Not what we’re talking about, but thanks!” Olu calls back. He returns his attention to Stede. “Anyways. ‘Daddy’ is… a vibe. Usually in reference to older men but not always. A zaddy is… Okay. Do you know who Christopher Meloni is?” He’s grateful for Lucius’s prattle about pop culture nonsense, because he did remember this. 

Stede shakes his head and takes out his phone, doing the older adult hunt and peck on his keyboard. His eyebrows raise when whatever he’s looking at loads.

“So I’m guessing it’s complimentary?” He’s got that little smile on his face, the one that reminds Olu Stede’s still adjusting to people finding him attractive. It's cute.

“Wait, somebody called you ‘zaddy’?” Archie’s materialized across the room. “Let me see!” 

Stede sighs dramatically, terribly put-upon. “If you must.” He brings up an app on his phone, tilts it so Olu and Archie can see.

Archie gives a low whistle. The guy messaging Stede is hot. Long silver hair, big brown eyes, leather pants, a not quite slutty purple crop top that exposes a bit of tummy. (Look. Olu is happily taken, but he has eyes, okay?)

“Stede, if that’s the guy messaging you, I think you should let him call you whatever he likes.”