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farewell
barca femeni x reader
summary: you didn't want to say goodbye, but you had to.
warnings: angst
the fluorescent lights hum above you, the sound barely noticeable over the pounding of your heart. youâre gripping the back of a chair so tightly your knuckles turn white.Â
your stomach churns, and for a moment, you consider turning around and walking out. but you canât. they deserve to hear it from youânot from the media, not from rumors.Â
theyâre all seated around the table, waiting. alexiaâs brow furrows slightly, her eyes scanning your face.Â
âwhatâs wrong?â she asks softly, her voice full of concern.
you swallow hard, trying to find your voice.Â
âi⊠i need to talk to you all about something,â you swallow hard, trying to find your voice. your words shaky, unsure.Â
patri tilts her head, her lips quirking into a faint smile like sheâs trying to ease your nerves. âyouâre concerning us, y/n. just say it.â
your throat tightens, and your gaze drops to the table.Â
âitâsââ you pause, forcing the words out. âitâs about my future here. at barca.â
the silence that follows feels deafening. alexia leans forward, her elbows resting on the table. âwhat about your future?â she presses gently, but you can hear the undercurrent of worry in her tone.
âi donât thinkâŠâ you hesitate again, tears burning the back of your eyes. you shake your head, willing them not to fall.Â
âi donât think i can stay here anymore.â
mapi sits up straighter, her eyes widening. âwhat are you talking about? youâre incredible. youâve been amazing since you got called up from la masia. why would you even think about leaving?â
you bite your lip hard, the sharp sting grounding you for a moment. âiâm not saying it because i want to leave,â you say quickly, your voice trembling.Â
âi love this team. youâre my family. butâŠâ you exhale shakily. âiâm barely playing. iâm barely getting minutes. iâi feel like iâm just⊠here. like iâll never grow. like iâll never be like you, mapi.â
alexiaâs expression shifts to one of denial. âthatâs not true, y/n. youâre already one of the best defenders we have. youâve just got less experience. that comes with time.â
you shake your head, tears slipping down your cheeks now despite your best efforts.Â
âbut when, alexia? when will i get that time? itâs always someone elseâingrid, mapi, ona, and martaâ if its not them it's jana frido and esmee. i understand why. youâre all incredible but where does that leave me? i feel like iâll always just be stuck here, waiting, hoping for scraps of time on the pitch.â
you pause, your chest tightening as the memory cuts through you again.Â
âdo you remember the champions league final against lyon?â you ask, your voice trembling as you try to steady yourself.Â
alexiaâs face softens, and she nods slowly. âof course,â she says, her voice quiet, like she already knows where this is going.
âwe were up 2-0,â you begin, the ache in your chest growing heavier.Â
âi thought⊠i really thought it was going to be my moment. jona told me to warm up. he told me, âbe ready, y/n. youâre going in soon.â i could feel it. the adrenaline, the nerves, all of it. i was ready to step up. i knew i could help.â
you clench your fists, your nails digging into your palms as the frustration bubbles up.Â
âand then⊠nothing. i waited. and waited. and when lyon almost scored from bachaâs cross, i thought, âokay, this is it. this is when heâll call me.â but jona didnât. he subbed on esmee. and i just stood there, watching as the game time slipped away from me.â
alexiaâs jaw tightens, her hands balling into fists on the table. âthat wasnât fair to you, but jona is not here anymore.â she says, her voice sharp, laced with anger she doesnât even try to hide.
âitâs not just that,â you continue, your voice breaking.Â
âitâs every time. we were up 5-0 against sevilla, and i thought, âthereâs no way i wonât get minutes now.â but he didnât even glance my way. i warmed up for five minutes, and then the final whistle blew. i didnât even get to step on the pitch.âÂ
you shake your head, tears streaming down your cheeks as your voice rises.Â
âhow am i supposed to grow if no one trusts me enough to let me try? iâm 21, alexia. i should be trusted to step up by now. i shouldnât still be sitting on the bench, waiting for the chance that never comes.â
mapiâs face softens as she steps toward you, placing a hand on your shoulder. âthatâs not on you,â she says gently, her voice steady.Â
âyouâve done everything right. we see you. we know how good you are.â
âbut it doesnât matter if the coach doesnât,â you whisper, your voice cracking.Â
âand maybe he never will. another coach does though-- just somewhere else.â Â
the silence in the room is heavy, the weight of your words sinking into all of them. patriâs brows knit together as she looks at you, her voice soft.Â
âso⊠where are you going?â she asks carefully.
you nod, wiping at your face.Â
âi think it might be bayern. theyâve been watching me. my agent said they trust me. theyâre giving me a chance to actually play, to prove myself.â
ingrid sighs, nodding slowly as understanding flickers across her face.Â
âit makes sense,â she says quietly. âbayernâs defense has holes, and a player like you? fast, smart, and tacticalâyouâd fit perfectly there.â
alexiaâs eyes narrow, her jaw clenching again. âbut theyâre not us,â she says firmly, her voice almost pleading.Â
âweâre your family, y/n. donât you see that?â
your chest tightens at her words. âi know,â you whisper, tears spilling over again.Â
âand i love all of you so much. but how can i stay when i feel like iâm being held back? i need to grow, alexia. i need to be more than just potential.â
alexiaâs hands grip the edge of the table as she stares down at it, her shoulders tense.Â
âitâs not fair,â she mutters, her voice thick with emotion. âyou shouldnât have to choose between staying with us and growing as a player.â
âbut i do,â you say softly, your voice trembling. âand i wish i didnât. i wish things could be different. i can-canât be stuck on the bench.â
patri frowns, her hand reaching across the table toward yours. âyouâre not stuck. youâve got all of us. youâre part of this team.â
âam i?â your voice cracks.Â
âlike i said.. when weâre up 5-0, coach does not even sub me on sometimes. when they do, itâs the 70th minute, maybe later. iâm not ungrateful, but how can i grow if i donât play?â
the room falls silent again. the lump in your throat grows heavier as you force yourself to continue.Â
âmy agent said⊠they said i need to leave if i want to reach my full potential.â
alexia flinches slightly, her face falling.Â
âbut⊠bayern?â alexiaâs voice is filled with disbelief.Â
âyouâre really going to leave? leave us?â
your chest tightens at her words. âale, you know that i donât want to,â you admit, your voice breaking.Â
âbut what choice do i have? if i stay, iâll never grow. iâll always be stuck in the shadows of all of you.â
mapiâs gaze softens, and she gets up, walking over to you. she places a hand on your shoulder, her grip firm and reassuring. âweâve all been where you are, y/n. that feeling of not being enough, of needing to prove yourself⊠itâs awful. but if this is what you need to do, then we support you.â
âmapi,â alexia snaps, her voice laced with frustration.Â
âhow can you say that? sheâs part of us.â
mapi sighs, turning to alexia.Â
âbecause i care about her, alexia. because she deserves this.â
tears are streaming down your face now, and you quickly wipe them away. âiâm sorry,â you whisper.Â
âiâm so sorry. i love you all so much. i wish it could be different.â
alexia stands, her jaw clenched as she stares at you. âwhen?â she finally asks, her voice low.
you meet her gaze, your heart breaking. âjanuary. the transfer will be official then.â
alexia looks away, her hands on her hips as she takes a moment to process. when she finally looks back at you, her eyes are glassy. âyouâve grown so much,â she says, her voice barely steady. âyouâve become like a baby sister to me. i donât want you to go.â
âi donât want to leave,â you whisper, your voice trembling again. âbut i have to.â
you know how reality is. you might keep contact with your barcelona teammates for a few weeks after transferring to bayern, and things will fade afterwards. that is how life goes, people move on, and you know you will have to as well if you want to fit in at bayern.
after joining the senior team two years ago from la masia, you thought that barcelona was going to be the club you played at for your whole career. you thought wrong.
alexia steps forward, pulling you into a tight hug. her arms wrap around you with a kind of desperation, like sheâs afraid letting go will make you disappear. âyouâre going to be amazing,â she murmurs. âbut iâm going to miss you so much.â
patri joins the hug next, her smaller frame squeezing you tightly. âbayern doesnât know how lucky they are,â she says softly. âtheyâre getting one of the best.â
âi wish coach would see what we all see in you, amor.â alexia says.Â
mapi and ingrid come next, the four of them holding you like theyâre trying to etch the moment into memory. ingridâs voice is calm and steady as she reassures you, âthe bundesliga is a great league. youâll fit in perfectly. trust yourself.â
when they finally pull away, alexiaâs hand lingers on your shoulder. âpromise me one thing,â she says, her voice firm.
âanything,â you reply.
âdonât lose that kindness or growing confidence,â she says, her lips curving into a bittersweet smile.Â
âitâs what makes you special. donât let anyone take that from you.â
you nod, tears still spilling down your cheeks. âi wonât.â
as you leave the room, your heart aches with the weight of the goodbye. you never thought that you would say farewell to the love of your life, barcelona, but sometimes you have to let go of the things you love most for your own good.
masterlist
#barcelona femeni#fc barcelona#woso fanfics#woso community#woso x reader#alexia putellas#bayern frauen#ingrid engen#patri guijarro#mapi leon
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@TacklersCulers: The Chaotic Teen Serie pt. 3
fcb femenĂ x chaoticteen!reader pt. 1 â pt. 2 2670w, it's kinda angsty, be warned<3 r gets nicknamed: "Diablilla" aka little devil in spanish as an endearment term "Skrulla" aka goofball/silly in norwegian for a mischievous child
17yo La Masia defender gets promoted to the first team. Will you be able to keep your fcb femenĂ fan account hidden while slowly making your place in the team with your idols?
You lean your head back against the metal locker, a smug smirk tugging at your lips. Your eyes meet Pina's and you can't help but choke back a snort.Â
You had called the forward in the morning, asking her to come pick you up since you wouldn't be able to walk to training like you had done for the past years.Â
"You owe it to me after that whole mess you started about my phone wallpaper yesterday," you huffed. While you weren't actually mad at Pina, you were sure as hell going to milk every favor you could out of her.Â
"Sure," she agreed without even needing a reason. This team was a family. If you needed a ride and she could help you out, she would do it, no questions asked.Â
âDo you have space in the trunk forâŠâ you trailed off, unsure if you could trust her now. If she said no, then your plan would fail.
âSĂ, Diablilla, now tell me the plan,â you could hear her chuckle through the phone like she had read your thoughts. And just like that, you became partners in crime.
The both of you arrived at the training centre giggling like children, clutching at each other's arms from how much you were laughing. You had underestimated how mischievous Pina could be for a good joke. Coming up with an ever better plan than the original, you both go straight to work.Â
The locker room is slowly filling, everyone realizing what you had done, most people figuring out Pina was in on it too with the glances you kept exchanging. Hushed whispers were heard around the room, everyone waiting for Mapi to come in. Pina had a phone propped up to capture it all.
You were doom scrolling your fan account, posting some more memes when the door opened again. You knew she had to arrive soon, almost everyone else was here already.Â
Silence.Â
You looked up to see Mapi walking in, smiling and in a good mood like usual, with Ingrid trailing behind. You bite your jersey to hide a smile you canât camouflage.Â
Mapi stood frozen, looking at her locker. Something was occupying her chair. The cardboard cutout of her doing her lion pose you owned. Fake Mapi was flexing and showing her teeth like an animal ready to fight. She burst out laughing, wheezing and letting herself fall on a chair.Â
It was the cue for the whole team to explode. Pinaâs voice shot up, barely hearable over the laughing. âSay hi for Instagram, Mapi!â she was moving around so much you were sure the video wouldnât even be good.
Alexia had been standing on the side of the room, an eyebrow raised, âOf course itâs you two.â she spoke, shaking her head disapprovingly. But even serious Alexia couldnât hold back a smile.Â
âI gotta admit kid, I didnât think youâd actually bring it,â the centre back wheezed, wiping tears away from her eyes.Â
The joyful energy was only made more electric by Ingrid, who leaned into the joke. Ingrid looked alternatively between Mapi sitting on the chair and the cardboard. She posed, mimicking being deep in thoughts.Â
"Mmh, which one is my girlfriend?" she had said, grinning.Â
âPina! Get this on the video!â you shouted, gesturing to whatever was about to happen, the woman happily nodded.Â
She slid down next to the cardboard, throwing her arm around the fake Mapi "This one!" she exclaimed, sending everyone toppling over.
Mapi gave her a shocked look, still laughing. "Oh I see how it goes, everyone prefers that pale copy now" she feigned annoyance. Ingrid kissed the cheek of the cardboard while Mapi pouted, voice shaky as she added, âwhat does she have that I donât?â
âThis one doesnât argue when Iâm right.â Ingrid answered, the Norwegian might have become your favourite person in the world right now. The look on the Spaniardâs face was priceless, you could have rolled on the floor.
"El LeĂłn stole the spotlight!" it was Jana who had chimed in. She was next to Pina and Patri, all three of them waving for you to get closer. You jumped to their side, hovering over Janaâs shoulder to look at the phone.Â
They had posted the video seconds ago on the main Barcelona account and it was already shaking up the internet. As the team calmed down and finished getting ready, thousands of comments popped up, requesting more videos. So the four of you obliged.Â
You posed Mapi and the cutout next to each other taking a picture and doing a poll in the story, which read âWhich is the better Mapi?â You knew social media, you knew how to bring in numbers.Â
Jana and Patri took the fake Mapi to the field while Pina and you ran to get some footballs. Both of you laughed when the cardboard had deflected a shot, still careful to keep it intact as you wanted to bring it back home safely. You all screamed âAND SHE DOES IT AGAIN, SAVING THE DAY!â zooming on it and then on Mapi, who watched with the biggest smile on her face. Mapi grabbed the phone to take selfies with the cutout. Everything was posted on the account, this would be the first thing fans ever got to see from you, and you werenât disappointed. This was a masterpiece of an introduction to the world.Â
In this moment, the bond that you had with this team felt invincible. Feeling more alive than you ever had previously. For some minutes, before Pina had arrived to pick you up, you had doubted. Maybe they wouldnât find it funny, maybe it would make them realize how childish you really were. But even the older, more mature players had laughed at your banter. Pina had treated you like a little sister, Mapi and Ingrid played along. There was a warmth in their teasing that made you feel at home.Â
So much so that you didnât even try to argue with Alexia when she clapped, asking for everyoneâs attention. âEverybody calm down, training now, chaos later.â she said firmly.Â
When she saw you grinning, she approached, âYes even you, Diablillaâ she joked, ruffling your hair. âShow us what you can do, besides being a trickster.â
So you hopped off, starting to stretch, warming up your muscles. This left you some time to reflect on the whole situation. You inhaled deeply. The first training session that you had had with the team had gone well, but you were aware it was a chill one, to ease you in the team. Pere had warned you today would be âintenseâ, as he had said exactly. You felt ready for what they were about to throw at you. You could feel yourself getting more focused, though you were still up for a good joke if the opportunity was there. The team was currently doing sprints to activate their body before doing drills and scrimmages.Â
Caro groaned after the last set, âWhy do we even do this?â She was clutching her sides, trying to find her breath again.
âSo we can outrun the refs when they try to card us.â you mumbled, sprints werenât your favorite exercise either.Â
Except it seemed you did not say this as low as you intended. You looked up to see most of the team staring at you. Most veterans seemed shocked, the younger players not so much. In the corner of your eyes you could see Jana and Salma holding in a chuckle.Â
âWhat?â you remarked, in disbelief, blush creeping onto your cheeks. Alright, itâs true that it wasnât very smart of you to admit you were prone to getting cards so much you had to learn how to run away from the refs.Â
âDios mĂo!â Alexia exclaimed, putting her hand on her forehead, âIrene! Youâre going to teach Cariño how to behave, sĂ?â she added with a sigh.Â
âNot fair! Why is Caro even complaining,â you were interrupted by Irene trying to drag you away, but you persisted, âlike she didnât run at 32 km/h during the 2023 world cup?â you grumbled.Â
Caro raised an eyebrow, looking at you with a proud expression. âYouâre a fan now? I thought you only liked defenders.â she replied, voice full of playfulness.Â
âI keep myself updated on statistics.â you attempted to say, trailing off knowing the team would, once again, never let you live that down.Â
Salma came up next to you, âSo you know statistics on everyone here?â she smirked, barking out a laugh when your eyes widened in horror.Â
âSorry! Canât hear you Iâm too far away getting ready for the drills,â you walked off with Irene, miming not being able to hear.Â
âThis isnât over Diablilla!â screamed Vicky, âweâll get all your fangirl secrets out of you later.âÂ
Oh, Vicky, if only you knew.Â
As you made your way next to the other defenders, you let out a breath. Determination taking over your cheeky eyes, you touched the tip of both of your boots with your fingers. The last of your rituals, this meant the game was on.Â
You threw yourself in all the tasks the coach had you do. While your inexperience showed on certain drills, your will to do well still pleased the team. In some ways, having spent so many years studying everything about that team helped you on the pitch. You could guess where Alexia would try to do a backward pass, or where Aitanaâs ball control might be more problematic to intercept. You tried your best to mirror Mapi, bending your knee lows, trying to push attackers on the side you wanted. An interception you made earned you a wide grin from Mapi while Ingrid had her thumbs up toward the sky to congratulate you. A shy smile creeped on your lips.
You were putting up a solid fight, having done a few successful tackles during a particularly difficult scrimmage. Maybe itâs how you ended up messing up so bad. The confidence rushed through you when you decided to slide tackle Caro. She was doing a solo run, and you were feeling mixed, split between not wanting to lose if she scored an equalizer and wanting praises from your teammates. It was childish, really. Almost shameful. You werenât here to be praised, you were here to work. But she was running, and you were shoulder to shoulder with her. It felt like the right timing, so you slid. The adrenaline rush was so strong that you didnât use your brain enough. You knew she was a master at feints, but still for a second you thought you had it.Â
You sensed the wet grass brushing against your skin, until the grass was replaced with a training cone you collided with. You froze, your whole body burning, watching in horror as Caro continued her run, chipping the ball over Cata, making her team come up to 2-2. And that was your fault, if you had accessed the situation for longer, you wouldnât have dived head first into an unnecessary tackle.
Ingrid jogged over to you, âYou alright, Skrulla?â reaching her hands to help you stand up. If your ears werenât ringing so bad from the shame and confusion, you would have asked the Norwegian what it meant.Â
You shrugged, wiping the grass from your shorts in embarrassment.Â
You knew you didnât do a good job hiding it when the green eyed woman added, âAt least it wasnât my back this time?â She was smiling brightly at you, so you forced out a laugh, the emotions stuck in your throat.Â
You shook your head, going back into position. Any positive feeling from your earlier exploit long gone. You tried to brush it off, but you were so frustrated with yourself and still had half the session to go through. So you pushed yourself more, hoping to erase the bad memory.Â
It didnât work though. By the time training finished, you were exhausted. Letting yourself flop on the ground, you clutched at your chest in pain. Little by little your abilities on the pitch had faded away, each pass connecting less and less, your timing getting worse. Everyone could see it, and some of your teammates gave you questioning looks. You couldnât deal with the attention on you, so you jumped up and made a beeline for the lockers.Â
You showered quicker than you thought possible, but by the time you were done, multiples of your teammates were around you. The buzzing of the room annoyed you more than it ever had previously.Â
You look up to see Ingrid and Mapi whispering, throwing glances at you. So, like the child you are, you grabbed your cardboard cutout and fled. Waving off a very confused Pina who thought sheâd drive you back home.Â
As you walk, you canât help but feel increasingly stupid. You know you shouldn't be nearly as bothered with that tackle as you currently were. It was so stupid. But it was so badly timed and you were ashamed about it. Sure your teammates were nice to you, and you all laughed together, but with that awful move you had just pulled? There was no way they'd ever trust you on the field. How could they trust you if you couldn't even slide tackle an opponent? Why would Pere give you any minutes if you messed up so bad when there was no pressure on you.Â
By the time you reached your dorm, you could feel tears rolling down your cheeks. You quickly wiped them with your sleeve, throwing yourself on your bed. Â
That was the down side of your brain. The obsession over football, that one singular process who made you apart from other players but was also your downfall. The way youâd obsess over every single one of your flaws, needing to perfect them all. Needing to have as much information on players. Youâd drive yourself crazy and sleep deprived watching footage until the birds would sing outside, signaling you it was early morning. It wasnât healthy. But it was all you knew.
You had grown up with coaches who had screamed at you that the difference between an amateur and a pro was when they stopped their drills. An amateur does it right once and stops, a pro keeps going until they canât get it wrong. So you just kept pushing. In some way, you hoped your brain would ease off having finally made the first team. It hadnât.
You rolled over, looking at the fake Mapi, still deep in thoughts. Your eye caught sight of a black mark on it, making you jump in a hurry. Had you damaged it while walking back home? Or when Pina and you were using it for shooting practice? Frowning, you leaned closer trying to figure out what had happened.Â
You gasped when you saw it.
You have the potential to be one of the greatest.
â MapiÂ
You let the tip of your fingers brush over the writing. Your idol hadnât only signed the cardboard without you even asking, she had written this. You felt a tug at your heartstring, and promised yourself to thank her profusely tomorrow.Â
For now, the only thing you could do was calm down. You inhaled deeply, feeling the rise of your ribcage, and exhaled softly, trying to release any tensions in your body. Maybe it was fine, maybe nobody would be mad at you, maybe youâd be able to fix it during the next training.Â
You needed a distraction, so you pulled out your phone to check the latest post from your fan account.
TacklerCulers
tacklerculers: Did you know? Attackers that trip in front of Mapi LeĂłn are actually just nervous to be close to her.
barcafan11: @TacklersCulers Are you going to talk about the new signing we saw on the official barça page today?
alex1aa: Iâm really disappointed, Barça does not need a clown.
b0nmat12: I hope sheâs just a social media person and not a player, otherwise weâre doomed for the Champions League.
Your stomach twisted when you saw the comments. You threw the phone at the wall and buried yourself into the blanket on your bed. The weight of failure still crushing your chest.
#mapi leon x reader#barcelona femeni x reader#fcb femenĂ#woso#woso community#mapi leon reader#fc barcelona#fcb femeni#barcelona women#barcelona femeni#ingrid engen#ingrid engen x reader#imagine#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso fanfics#fcb femeni x reader#idk why i did that#yes i made the meme#it's funny in my head but is it really#barcelona femeni x teen reader#teen reader#platonic#mapi leon x ingrid engen#mapi leon x ingrid engen x teen reader
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à©â§âàŒș 1:43 am àŒșâ§â à©
characters: sakura haruka x gn!reader content: fluff a/n: methinks he doesnât like to ask for it but he lowkey really enjoys listening to you talk so pls do yap to him abt wtv (he might start tweaking if u donât) â 800 wc
Itâs peaceful, blissfully cold, and youâre soundly sleeping when you start to notice two things; something is vibrating, and itâs in the middle of the night.
Well, you assume itâs in the middle of the night since itâs still dark out and no trace of daylight is present at the moment. Not like you can think of anything else either, since you had just been woken up by the former of those aforementioned details.
Groggily and very much grumpily, your hand blindly searches for the source of the vibrating object which you had felt somewhere on the back of your thigh. Snippets of last night appear in your foggy mind, a small reminder of how you had accidentally fallen asleep while mindlessly scrolling through your phone before bed.
Finally managing to get the device in your hand, a low curse escapes from you as the beaming screen blinds your bleary eyes.
âsakura <3â, the name on the screen reads.
Your eyebrows furrow, confusion evident on your face but you slide a thumb across the screen to answer the call anyway. âSakuraâŠ?â
Across the static line between you two, Sakura closes his eyes as he relishes in the sound of your voice, albeit a little raspy from sleep. Too lost in the familiarity of it, he almost forgets that he hasnât replied yet.
âAh - hey...â he greets, slightly embarrassed that he doesnât have anything thought up to say.
Sakura is by no means a frequent caller nor a texterâ heck, he barely even touches the damn device heâs holding in his hand right now. But itâs past midnight. His body is tired, his mind can hardly keep up with how much heâs been thinking of you, and the next thing he knows, his fingers were already pulling up the number to your contact.
Youâre no different than him, of course. Even in your sleepy haze, you canât stop the onslaught of fluttering butterflies in your stomach just as his voice enters your ears, which unknowingly elicits a sigh from you, quiet and dreamy.
âIs everything alright? You never really contacted me unless itâs something important,â you ask worriedly, turning in bed as you try to get comfortable again under your blanket.
ââm fine, nothinâs wrong.â
âOh, okayâŠâ You trail off, unsure. âUhm, is there anything you wanted to talk about?â
From where heâs sitting on the lone mattress in his home, blankets haphazardly tossed aside, Sakura taps his index finger repeatedly out of nervous tension. He feels stupid now; stupidly guilty that he had woken you up from your much needed slumber for - what?
What was he planning to say anyway? That this measly phone call was done out of pure impulse? That he had been kept awake all night because the only way he could fall asleep is when youâre there beside him? And that heâs been missing you all day?
He almost punched himself at how humiliatingly needy and deprived that sounds.
âNo,â he opts instead, clenching his teeth as he reminds himself to ask any of his seniors for some good beating sparring tomorrow. Kaji, or Hiragi, preferably. Maybe then he could get this idiocy and cringiness punched out of him.
The line goes silent for a few moments. âThen why are youââ Your eyebrows furrow before realization sets in, a soft smile growing on your face. Blankets pulled up to your chin, you lay on your side as you let your phone get sandwiched between your cheek and the pillow.
âActually, you wanna know what happened earlier today?â
Your boyfriend perks up at that, silvery and golden orbs gleaming in the dark room. He hums in affirmation, and thatâs all you need before you start telling him about your day; all the littlest and most random things you found, all the people youâve met, everything and nothing. Your voice, mellow and soothing, courses through him like a wave gently lapping up the shore, harmonious in its ebbing tide.
Aside from the few replies of acknowledgment, Sakura listens, listens and just listens. Heâs carving a special place for your voice at the very front of his mind. Every rise and drop, every lilted word he could get. Like an anchor deep in the bottom of the sea, you ground him from drifting away to that bottomless pit he was once in back then.
Itâs not until you stop talking for a second that he realizes heâs been focusing too much on the sound instead of comprehending what youâve been saying, and you immediately catch on to that. You gently call out to him, and Sakura has to hold in the urge to shy away into the collar of his shirt from how affectionate and nice his name sounds on your lips.
âSakura?â
âW-what?â He flushes red, though heâs glad that youâre not there to see it.
You bite down on your bottom lip, lightly chuckling in endearment. âNothing, I justâŠâ
A beat of silence passes.
âI love you, yeah?â
Yup, Sakura is a goner now (if not already).
told yall iâm a sakura girlie heh (< said the person who wrote for some other guy first before her top fave)
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đČđ°đżđ°đłđŽđ
. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !
#wbk x reader#wind breaker x reader#windbreaker x reader#wbk#wind breaker#wind breaker (satoru nii)#sakura haruka#sakura haruka x reader#haruka sakura x reader#haruka sakura fluff#sakura haruka fluff#sakura haruka x you#đ„Ł rye works#divider by saradika
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Dan's interactions with humans had taught him that it was best to deal with the ones that challenged him swiftly, making it very clear to them that antagonizing him wasn't a very wise idea. He didn't enjoy it, but it proved to be better in the long run as it made the human more likely to cooperate instead of being purposely stubborn. He just didn't expect to have to use it at home, but he had learned there was a first time for everything so he wasn't too surprised.
Strasky shifted his attention from his counterpart to get a better look at the room, some of the walls were decorated with photos he recognized of his family with a noticeably younger Peter and Dan. Every photo included Dan, most were ones that you wouldn't expect the family android to be in. It seemed they took Dan with them on vacation, had him join in with holiday celebrations, and even celebrated the PL600's birthday or more likely the day he was activated. He noticed a few casual ones of Dan playing a video game with Peter, his mother happily helping Dan cook, and his dad showing Dan how to fix a car. Only one had Vincent and Peter was missing, meaning his parents were likely introducing their new android to their son.
Now he understood why Dan had stuck around, not once had he been mistreated as it seemed many androids were, and he'd been family since day one. So it only made sense he wouldn't want to leave his family, and instead chose to continue his role around the home. As well as why Peter might want to make the android virtually indestructible as it was clear Dan meant a lot to him, and the thought of loosing him was probably too much to bear.
Strasky was startled out of his thoughts by the android he'd seen with Dan back in the park, only now his white uniform had a rather dark blue stain on one of the arm. He was able to get a look at the androids uniform that let him know he was an RK900 as he brushed past. The RK900 headed over to Brent, who helped him out of the jacket and dress shirt, revealing his damaged arm that Brent quickly got to work repairing.
Peter glanced at the RK900, giving him an acknowledging nod which the android returned before he focused back on them. "Well, it's nice to meet you." He paused as Strasky was shown to him, cocking his head as a look of visible confusion crossed his face. He glanced at Dan who gave him a nod, confirming what they had said. "Oh, that's....interesting...." He was still a bit unsure as was evident by the look on his face as he looked over Strasky, but he didn't ask any questions as he likely wasn't sure if he wanted to know fully what was going on yet.
Peter moved to stand behind Dan, resting his chin on top of the PL600's head. He grabbed something off the desk, handing it to Dan to look over as he rested his arms over the android's shoulders. "What work did you have in mind?" He asked as Dan handed the object back to him and he stood back up. He grabbed a few tools nearby as Dan deactivated his skin, allowing the white and grey plating underneath to be seen. "If it's custom work that will take a bit longer, as you probably expected." He said with a shrug before he removed a plate from the back of Dan's head.
He plugged in a nearby computer to Dan's brain then typed in a command that made Dan's spine go perfectly straight and lock in place. "And yes, I have gotten better at working on brains. You don't have to worry about anything like my first attempt. Though I thought I'd done pretty good considering a bullet went through it. He works okay, more like a human then an android, but he's okay with it." He seemed to think they'd met the android he was talking about, but it was clear from his words the android was likely very odd when it came to things one would expect an android to be able to accomplish without issue.
He carefully reached into Dan's head, obviously unplugging something as Dan's limbs went limp. Peter picked up the small object Dan had handed back to him, inserting it into his brain before reconnecting whatever he'd unplugged. He snapped the plating back into place then turned to the computer to let him have control of his spine back as Dan reactivated his skin.
Strasky moved aside as another android entered the room, it looked just like Dan except he was wearing more normal clothes instead of his uniform. The other PL600 approached Brent who handed him the RK900's stained uniform then quickly left the room. Strasky watched him leave, which Peter picked up on.
"That was Daniel, no he wasn't one of ours. I just fixed him up, and like every android here, he decided to stick around. Not that I mind, feels like it would be mean to start kicking them out as androids are having a hard time finding places to live currently. And it's even harder for them to find places they feel safe in." He explained, feeling he should probably do that as many wondered why there was an over abundance of androids on the property.
"Oh, and this one is Nines." He turned to motion to the RK900 who waved to them with his good arm. "The one running around that looks similar to him is Sixty, an RK800, he's the one that took the bullet to the brain." Nines looked a little annoyed at the mention of Sixty, but still stayed silent.
"So what kind of unit needs work?" He asked curiously as he went back to resting against Dan, clearly just to irritate the android as he smirked when Dan let out an annoyed huff.
The android Bishop chose to ignore Dan and gave Vincent only a slight nod. Truth be told, he didn't know why Bishop specifically had made him snap like that. It wasn't the first time a stranger got close to Vincent, after all. He just knew not to trust someone with his face.
He watched Bishop follow the others after fixing his tie, still not liking the idea of the man being around, but not enough to ask him who the hell he was.
"Charming place." Rook said, eyeing the cells.
"The previous owner was known for its questionable work." Willow explained, "He will hardly be missed."
Willow's disdainful tone was telling of what she thought of Zlatko. So, Rook decided to keep her rest of her comments to herself in favor of having a look at the man of the hour.
Or rather the boy. Age wasn't something Bishop usually concerned himself with. Still, being faced with the perspective of another, younger Strasky was already causing him to grind his teeth in anticipation of the nonsense they'd certainly have to deal with.
"Yep, that's Strasky all right." Rook said, taking a step forward, "Hi, Iâm Rook and this is Willow. We're here because we need someone who's good with androids to do some work for us. But before we get to that, there's someone you should meet."
Bishop proceeded to grab the back of Strasky's uniform and moved him into view. "Meet yourself."
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đ»đđ đłđđđ đ¶đ đ©đđ
& đ©đđđđđ đČđđđ đđđđđđđđđđđđ đđđđ đčđđđ đȘđđđđđđ
(TW: not proofread, mention of drugs, and bad grammar )
đđ©đŠ đłđŠđđąđ”đȘđ°đŻđŽđ©đȘđ± đŁđŠđ”đžđŠđŠđŻ đđąđ„ & đđ°đ¶đ«đŠđŠ đđ°đ°đŹ đąđŻđ„ đđąđ§đŠ, đ„đȘđ„đŻâđ” đŽđ”đąđłđ” đ°đ§đ§ đđȘđŹđŠ đŽđ¶đŻđŽđ©đȘđŻđŠ đąđŻđ„ đłđąđȘđŻđŁđ°đžđŽ đžđ©đȘđ€đ© đŠđ·đŠđłđșđ°đŻđŠ đ±đłđŠđ„đȘđ€đ”đŠđ„âđ”đžđ° đŽđ”đ¶đŁđŁđ°đłđŻ đąđŻđ„ đ·đŠđłđș đ°đ±đȘđŻđȘđ°đŻđąđ”đŠđ„ đ±đŠđ°đ±đđŠ đ€đ°đŻđŻđŠđ€đ”đȘđŻđš đ”đ©đŠ đ§đȘđłđŽđ” đ”đłđș? đđłđș đąđšđąđȘđŻ.
đłđđŸ đżđđđđ đđđđŸ đđđŸ đđđ đđđđ
đœđ đŒđđ
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đđœđŸđœ, đ»đŸđđșđ đșđ đđđŸ đđż đđđŸ đđșđđđđŸđ đđđđđŸđœ đ»đ đđđđŸ đđđđŸđ đđđșđ đ±đșđżđŸ đđ đđđŸ đąđșđđŸđđđ đđŸđđđœđŸđđŒđŸ đșđđœ đ
đđđŸ đđđđșđ
đŸđđŸđđđđđŸ đđđđđ đđ. đšđđŒđ
đđœđđđ đđđ đđđŸđŒđđșđ
đđŸđ đȘđđđ đ°đđŸđŸđ, đđșđđđđ đđŸđ đżđșđđđđđđșđ»đ
đ đ
đșđđŸ đșđđđđđșđ
.
Bad and Boujee Kook stepped away from her newly made friends or possible acquaintances depending on how it goes to determine if theyâre genuine or not. She sashayed through the crowd of people, reaching the corner turn to the kitchen and collided into a wall?
No instead, it was none other than Rafe Cameron, and just so lucky for her it included the red plastic solo-cup filled with whiskey that spilled on her.
âWhat the fuck?!â She exclaims, stepping back to look down to her red velvet tube top and leopard print mini skirt, now stained with whiskey.
âYou should watch where youâre going.â Rafe grumbled, carelessly tossing the cup to the trash and unapologetic for spilling on her.
She stared at him with a dumbfounded expression, before changing into an angered one after.
âMe? Youâre the douchebag that spilled your drink on me and still havenât apologized.â She scoffed, pointing her finger hard into his chest to make her point.
âWhy would I apologize? Youâre the one who in fact bumped into me first.â Rafe declared, crossing his arms across his chest and smirked amusingly.
âMatter of fact, I think you owe me a drink.â
It was the final straw, which led to Bad and Boujee Kook to only smile mockingly then grabbed the closest drink nearby; unfortunately it happened to be Topper that came by to see the commotion.
âWhat are youââ Rafe tried to ask, but cut off by the sudden liquid tossed into his face and cup thrown at his head right after by her.
âDrink up, bitch boy.â She made the final comment, before walking off from the two in the kitchen and deciding to leave the party early than anticipated.
Topper eyes were wide, shocked by the sudden commotion that escalated quickly and unsure to what to say without risking his best friend from kicking his ass for it or shouting at him. Odds were not good.
âDid she really?â Topper continued looking between his best friend and the silhouette of her before disappearing into the crowd of people.
âShe did.â Rafe exhaled a long sigh, wiping the beer from the keg stand from his face and his eyes.
But something deep down inside of him ignited; intrigue? curiosity? interest? It was all unsure except one thing on his mind. He needed someone like her.
âThat was kinda hot.â He admitted, unfazed by the stickiness and scent of beer lingering on him.
Topper shakes his head, concerned about his friend. âMan youâve got some issues..â
đđŠđŽđ±đȘđ”đŠ đ”đ©đŠđȘđł đ§đȘđłđŽđ” đźđŠđŠđ”đȘđŻđš đŻđ°đ” đšđ°đȘđŻđš đąđŽ đ±đđąđŻđŻđŠđ„, đđąđ§đŠ đźđąđŻđąđšđŠđ„ đ”đ° đźđąđŹđŠ đȘđ” đ¶đ± đ”đ° đđąđ„ & đđ°đ¶đ«đŠđŠ đđ°đ°đŹ đŁđș đ°đ§đ§đŠđłđȘđŻđš đ”đ° đ”đąđŹđŠ đ©đŠđł đ”đ° đ”đ©đŠ đźđąđȘđŻđđąđŻđ„đŽ đ”đ° đ±đąđș đ©đŠđł đŁđąđ€đŹ đ§đ°đł đ”đ©đŠ đłđ¶đȘđŻđŠđ„ đ”đ°đ± đąđŻđ„ đŽđŹđȘđłđ” đ§đłđ°đź đ”đ©đŠ đ±đłđŠđ·đȘđ°đ¶đŽ đ±đąđłđ”đș
đđ±đ°đȘđđŠđł đđđŠđłđ”; đđąđ§đŠ đŠđŻđ„đŠđ„ đ¶đ± đŽđ±đŠđŻđ„đȘđŻđš đźđ°đłđŠ đ”đ©đąđŻ đ©đŠ đ°đłđȘđšđȘđŻđąđđđș đ±đđąđŻđŻđŠđ„ đžđȘđ”đ© đ°đŻđŠ đŽđ©đ°đ±đ±đȘđŻđš đ”đłđȘđ± đ”đ©đąđ” đ”đ¶đłđŻđŠđ„ đȘđŻđ”đ° đ”đžđ° đ°đł đ”đ©đłđŠđŠ đźđ°đłđŠ đŁđ°đ¶đ”đȘđČđ¶đŠđŽ đąđŻđ„ đžđȘđŻđŻđȘđŻđš đ©đŠđł đ°đ·đŠđł đ”đ° đąđšđłđŠđŠ đ”đ° đ”đ©đŠ đ€đ©đąđŻđ€đŠđŽ đ°đ§ đšđ°đȘđŻđš đ°đŻ đą đ„đąđ”đŠ.
đđąđ§đŠ đđąđźđŠđłđ°đŻ đ©đąđ„ đ„đąđ”đŠđ„ đ±đđŠđŻđ”đș đ°đ§ đšđȘđłđđŽ đąđŻđ„ đ©đąđ„ đźđŠđąđŻđȘđŻđšđđŠđŽđŽ đ°đŻđŠ đŻđȘđšđ©đ” đŽđ”đąđŻđ„đŽ, đŁđ¶đ” đŻđ°đŻđŠ đ€đ°đźđ±đąđłđŠđ„ đ”đ° đ©đŠđł. đđ©đŠ đžđąđŽ đ”đ©đŠ đ§đȘđłđŽđ” đ”đ° đŠđ·đŠđł đŽđŻđąđ± đŁđąđ€đŹ đžđ©đŠđŻđŠđ·đŠđł đ©đŠ đšđ°đ” đȘđŻđ”đ° đ©đȘđŽ đźđ°đ°đ„đŽ, đȘđŻđŽđ”đŠđąđ„ đ°đ§ đ”đ©đłđŠđąđ”đŠđŻđȘđŻđš đ”đ° đđŠđąđ·đŠ đŽđ©đŠ đ€đ©đ°đ°đŽđŠđŽ đ”đ° đđŠđąđ·đŠ đŽđȘđđŠđŻđ”đđș đžđȘđ”đ©đ°đ¶đ” đą đžđ°đłđ„ (đđ€đąđłđŠđ„ đ©đȘđź đŽđ©đȘđ”đđŠđŽđŽ đŠđ·đŠđłđș đ”đȘđźđŠ) đąđŻđ„ đŻđ°đ” đ±đ¶đ”đ”đȘđŻđš đ¶đ± đžđȘđ”đ© đ©đȘđŽ đŻđ°đŻđŽđŠđŻđŽđŠ.
âRafe, Iâm not going to keep putting up with the hot and cold shoulder. Weâre adults for fuck sake, this isnât elementary to play hot and cold game.â She snapped finally, ready to put him in his place.
âIf you feel that way, then go ahead and pack your shit then leave.â Rafe threatened carelessly, not entirely serious and thinking heâd have the win over her.
His once big ego shrinks, after witnessing her give one firm nod and mumbled of âokayâ then proceeded to walk into the shared walk-in closet to pack a bag. It was like his heart dropped to his stomach, not sure if she was serious or play reverse psychology on him.
âWhat are you doing?â He asked, approaching her in the walk-in closet and seeing her grab leather brown Louis Vuitton duffle bag to pack her clothes and shoes.
She scoffed, not replying this time instead continuing to stride around the room to grab some of her belongings that were deemed important enough.
âAre you serious going to leave?â He continued to speak, his anxiety rising and stepped into the room to try stepping in her way to prevent her.
She looked up to him with disbelief, chuckling softly.
âIâm not gonna stay where Iâm not wanted, so can you move? Please and thank you.â She stepped around him to grab some of her shoes.
It was one big reality check, that Bad & Boujee Kook wasnât like his exâs that used to drop to his feet begging to fix things or to stay, instead she seems okayâd enough to give it up and leave him.
For the first time ever in his life, Rafe practically leaped to grab ahold her and putting aside dignity and pride to keep her from actually leaving him.
âBaby, IâŠI didnât mean it.â He mumbled, feeling unlike himself to do this kind of thing but he actually cared about her and their relationship. âDonât..â
âDonât what?â She asked, expectantly awaiting for him to spit out the words sheâd been awaiting for him to say and making 10x difficult for him. âUse your words.â
He grumbled, in taking a sharp breath and avoiding her gaze after it made it much harder doing so while she loved every second of it to relish it.
âDonât leave me.â He says, after clearing his throat and speaking clearly while trying to not get pouty although it sounded like it in his voice. ââŠplease.â
She exhaled a small sigh but cracked into the little smile upon her soft, plump lips and set down the bag to step closer towards him. Her hand cupped his jaw, tilting his head to gaze into her eyes.
âDonât pull this shit again, cause we both know Iâm the last one to put up with it.â She stated simply, then sealed it with a soft kiss to his cheek. âGot it?â
He felt glad no one was around, to see the way she got him wrapped her little finger and easily whipped.
âIâve got it.â He stated firmly.
âGood boy.â She giggled.
(Alexa play Walk Em Like A Dog By Saucy Santana)
đđŻđŠ đđ¶đąđłđąđŻđ”đŠđŠ đȘđŻ đ”đ©đŠ đłđŠđđąđ”đȘđ°đŻđŽđ©đȘđ±, đđąđ„ đąđŻđ„ đđ°đ¶đ«đŠđŠ đđ°đ°đŹ đžđąđŽ đ”đ©đŠ đ„đŠđ§đȘđŻđȘđ”đȘđ°đŻ đ°đ§ đ©đ°đźđŠ đąđŻđ„ đŽđąđ§đŠ đ±đđąđ€đŠ đ§đ°đł đđąđ§đŠ, đŽđȘđźđȘđđąđł đ©đ°đž đ©đŠ đžđąđŽ đ”đ° đ©đŠđł. đđ©đȘđŽ đȘđŻđ€đđ¶đ„đŠđ„ đ”đ©đŠ đ”đȘđźđŠđŽ đ©đȘđŽ đ§đąđ”đ©đŠđł đđąđłđ„ đžđ°đ¶đđ„ đ€đ©đ°đ°đŽđŠ đđąđłđąđ© đ°đ·đŠđł đ©đȘđź đŠđ·đŠđłđș đ”đȘđźđŠ, đłđŠđšđąđłđ„đđŠđŽđŽ đ”đ©đŠ đ”đ©đȘđŻđšđŽ đ©đŠâđ„ đ„đ°đŻđŠ đ§đ°đł đ©đȘđŽ đąđ±đ±đłđ°đ·đąđ đąđŻđ„ đđ°đ·đŠ.
đđŽđ±đŠđ€đȘđąđđđș đ”đ©đŠ đ”đȘđźđŠ đđąđłđ„ đŹđȘđ€đŹđŠđ„ đ°đ¶đ” đđąđ§đŠ đąđŻđ„ đ©đŠ đ©đąđ„ đŻđ°đžđ©đŠđłđŠ đŠđđŽđŠ đŁđ¶đ” đŁđąđ„ đąđŻđ„ đŁđ°đ¶đ«đŠđŠ đŹđ°đ°đŹâđŽ đ±đđąđ€đŠ đ”đ° đłđ¶đŻ đ”đ° đžđ©đȘđđŠ đŽđ±đȘđłđąđđȘđŻđš đąđŻđ„ đšđ°đȘđŻđš đ”đ©đłđ°đ¶đšđ© đžđȘđ”đ©đ„đłđąđžđąđđŽ đ§đłđ°đź đ€đ°đŹđŠ.
Bad and Boujee Kook home was the second safe place for Rafe, including her parents that welcomed him with open arms to their family. Including extending a key for him to use cause of how much they trusted him.
Which why it wasnât a surprise that he came over, with the emergency key in hand to unlock the front door at 3 in the morning and nowhere to go in the rain. He had been driving around the island aimlessly, going through one big manic episode after the fight with his dad; Ward, and his drug dealer Barry not responding.
She had zero experience with anyone that gone through withdrawals from drugs or anything as such, but she was willing to try to help him.
Even if it meant sitting on the shower floor with the water turned lukewarm and holding him tightly in her arms after he goes through the symptoms. She continued playing with his hair, as her other free hand rubbing his back soothingly slow.
âI-I want to quitâŠI want to be clean, but.â Rafe mumbled, stuttering over his words and trying to open up but still finding it difficult to explain.
âShh, Iâve got you.â She whispered, placing soft kisses to his head while his head rested upon her bare chest and her nude body sat in his lap. Yet still the big spoon.
âIt wonât always be easy, but when youâre ready Iâll be there through it all.â She kissed his temple, continuing to hold him through the entire shower.
The moodboard of the dynamic couple
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Misery - Part Three
Based on Misery by Stephen King
Stuck in the mountains, you foolishly decide to drive through a blizzard. The man that drags you from your wrecked car brings you to his cabin and patches you up. But as the snow piles up outside, you start to suspect that your rescuer's intentions may be far from pure.
Previous Chapter
After Andy left, you managed to change out of your clothes. The flannel shirt he gave you was worn down just enough to feel cozy and the smell of his cologne still lingered 'round the collar.
You settled against the headboard and almost dozed off before he came back. He'd taken off his jacket and carried a pile of firewood in his arms. He dumped the logs in the fireplace and stood up, revealing a wife beater and arms thick with muscle. You were right about his strength - his body was just further proof of it.
"Sorry 'bout that. I should have brought some in last night but well..."
He turned to you, dusting his hands. "I got a good look at the situation outside. You might not wanna hear it but we're totally snowed in. Phone lines are down too."
"Oh. I didn't realise it was that bad."
You felt a dull sort of trepidation. Andy had been nothing but kind to you, but being stuck out in the mountains frightened you.
"Any idea when things will open up again?"
He sat down in the chair beside your bed and stretched out. For a second, the only thought in your head was how dangerous and lean he looked. His dog tags caught the light and winked at you.
"Hard to tell. We're far off the beaten path. Only folks nearby are the Roydmans and they're a good few miles off. 'Sides, snows too deep to drive through so even if they clear off the main road, we ain't getting there anytime soon."
You felt your heart sink. "Do you think I need to go to the hospital?"
He raised a brow and skimmed his eyes across your body. "It ain't looking pretty, but I reckon you can handle it."
"Hurts like hell though."
"Sorry princess, but it'll take a while for this sort of hurt to heal. Best I can do is give you something strong for the pain."
Your ankle still throbbed mercilessly and hearing him say that made you all the more aware of it. You searched desperately around the room for a distraction.
The room was much larger than you realised, with a panelled wood ceiling and big bay windows. From your position, all you could see was the sky.
It was comfortable and starkly clean. Oh God, was this his room or a guest room?
"I haven't kicked you out of your room, have I?" you asked, suddenly unsure of yourself.
He grinned and rubbed his jaw. "I reckoned you needed a nice bed far more than I did."
"Shit, I'm so sorry!" Your hands fluttered to your lips. You felt terribly guilty. "I can't imagine how much I've put you out."
He waved you away. "It gets awful quiet up here. You have no idea how nice it is to have company."
His eyes dropped to the shirt you were wearing. "Real nice."
He reached up to play around with his dog tags and you finally noticed the tattoo across his forearm.
"Semper Fidelis?"
"Always loyal."
He reached forward and let you inspect his arm. You took hold of his wrist and traced the tattoo with your fingertips. The words themselves were small and neat, but the rest of it was an intricate pattern of barbed wire that wound round his forearm.
"Did it hurt?"
"Tell you the truth? It stung like a bitch."
He was watching your face and when you looked up at him, your eyes met. Those eyes on the other end of a gun would have sent you running for the hills. You pitied the soldiers that faced off against him.
You let go of his arm and swallowed.
"When did you get it?"
He let his forearm rest next to your thigh.
"When I was deployed for the first time."
He was close enough that you caught the scent of his cologne and the sweet smell of pine from the wood he chopped.
"How did you end up in the Marines anyway?"
"I've got you curious, do I?"
You felt yourself blush. "Maybe a little."
"Hmm." He rubbed at his jaw, like he was trying to rub away a smile.
"Maybe I'll tell you about it someday. For now though, you need to take some tablets and get some sleep."
"But what about you? I've kind of colonised your bed."
"First thing you learn in basic is to sleep standing up. I'll be fine sleeping on the couch. 'Sides, I ain't the one who went crashing off the road less than a day ago."
He reached into his jeans pocket and pulled out a blister pack of tablets.
"These are Novril. They pack a hell of a punch, so I expect you to sleep through the rest of the day. Best thing you can do right now is rest, got it?"
"Yes sir."
He dropped two shiny white pills into your open palm.
"Good girl. Now drink up."
He passed you a glass of water from the nightstand. The tablets left a slightly bitter taste behind, but you hurt too much to mind it.
Outside, the snow started up again.
You smiled at him. "How am I ever supposed to repay you?"
He studied you for a second.
The shirt you borrowed was missing a few buttons near the top and gaped open just a little at your tits, but you were too drowsy to notice.
He grinned that slow, lazy smile of his. "I'm sure you'll think of something, princess."
You hadn't fully realised just how intimate this all was. You were wearing his clothes. Sleeping in his bed. Entirely reliant on him to take care of you.
He stood up and shook his head. "You must be hungry. Any requests?"
"Nope. I'll take anything at this point."
His eyes flickered to your chest and then quickly away. "I can make you regret that real fast, y'know."
"Come on, you can't be that bad of a chef."
He huffed and shook his head. "You just sit pretty and I'll be back."
He returned with a bowl of oats sprinkled with brown sugar. His fingers brushed yours when he handed it to you and he lingered for a second longer than needed.
"I'm afraid it's all hospital chow until you're stronger. It's too bad - I make a mean flapjack."
You played around with your spoon and then gave in. Plain oats or not, you needed your strength.
Andy was quiet while you ate, watching the snow swirl across the window.
He tugged at his dog tags again and spoke up, "Does anyone know you're out here? A boyfriend, a sibling, anyone that knows where you were headed?"
You carefully put your empty bowl down on the nightstand. With the tablets, the pain was mercifully retreating. Not gone, never entirely gone, but a tiny bit more manageable.
"No. I wanted to surprise a friend but they don't know I'm coming."
You felt unnaturally drowsy for this early in the day. He must have noticed it because he stood up and gently pressed at your shoulders.
"Lie down and I promise you'll be out like a light soon enough."
You listened to him and found your eyes drifting shut as soon as you hit the pillow.
"Y'know." Your voice was muffled by your pillow. "You're a really great guy."
"Thanks, but save that until after you're better, yeah?"
He pulled the duvet higher and carefully tucked it around your shoulders.
"Not a soul knows you're out here?"
You hummed in agreement. You were almost entirely asleep and barely felt the hand that drifted across your forehead, gently pushing the hair off your face.
"Just you and me, princess."
You didn't hear it, but there was a strange note to his voice. Fear, maybe. Or longing. Hard to tell, with how similar they can be.
Next Chapter [coming soon]
Masterlist
Taglist
@pleorexicz @lem-hhn @mybelovedjupiter
#he has intentions all right#and they sure ain't good#cowboy coded#yandere misery adaptation#yandere#yandere x reader#reader insert#yandere scenarios#yandere imagines#x reader#yandere oc
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Second chance 5 "I still keep your picture in my wallet" and 11 "you always had a piece of my heart" for cheol please (extra fluffy happy ending)
Your works are so cute!!đ±đ±
thank you anon!!! đ€
request your own: full prompt list!
check out my masterlist! // cheol's m.list
second chance prompt #5: "i still keep your picture in my wallet." +
second chance prompt #11: "you always had a piece of my heart.
seungcheol didnât know how he ended up here, sitting in front of you with his heart lodged somewhere between his ribs and his throat. the cafe was quieter than he expected for a saturday afternoon, the smell of freshly brewed coffee filling the air. you looked exactly the same as he rememberedâmaybe a little older, a little wiser, but still undeniably you.
âitâs been a while,â you said, breaking the silence.
âyeah,â he breathed, his fingers curling around the strap of his bag. âtoo long.â
you nodded, your eyes searching his face for something he wasnât sure he could give.
âhowâve you been?â he asked, the words awkward on his tongue.
âgood,â you replied. âbusy. workâs been⊠a lot, but itâs fine.â
he nodded, unsure of what else to say. there was a time when talking to you was the easiest thing in the world, when your laughter felt like sunlight and your words were his favorite song. but now, standing here in the aftermath of everything that happened, he felt like a stranger.
âyou?â you asked, tilting your head slightly. âhow are you?â
âfine,â he said automatically, then hesitated. âbetter. iâm better.â
your lips twitched into a small smile, and for a moment, it felt like no time had passed at all.
âlook,â he said, clearing his throat. âi know this is⊠weird. and maybe i shouldnât have asked you to meet me, but thereâs something i need to say.â
you straightened slightly, your expression cautious but open. âokay.â
seungcheol took a deep breath, his fingers brushing against the edge of his pocket. âi still keep your picture in my wallet,â he said, his voice quiet but steady.
your eyes widened, surprise flickering across your face. âyou⊠what?â
âyour picture,â he repeated, pulling his wallet out and flipping it open. he slid the small, worn photograph out and held it up for you to see. âitâs been there ever since we got together and when we broke upâ i couldnât⊠i couldnât bring myself to take it out.â
you stared at the photo, your fingers trembling slightly as you reached for it. âwhy?â
âbecause,â he said, his voice softening, âyou always had a piece of my heart. even when we werenât together, even when it hurt too much to think about you⊠you were still there.â
your breath hitched, and seungcheol felt his chest tighten at the sight of the tears welling in your eyes.
âi thought you hated me,â you whispered, your voice barely audible.
âi could never hate you,â he said, shaking his head. âi was angryâat myself, at the situation, but never at you.â
you bit your lip, your gaze dropping to the photo in your hands. âcheolâŠâ
âi donât expect anything,â he said quickly, his heart pounding in his chest. âi just⊠i needed you to know. i needed to tell you that i never stopped caring about you. not for a second.â
you looked up at him then, your eyes searching his face for something he couldnât quite name.
âi couldnât keep pretending i was okay without you,â he admitted, his voice trembling. âi tried to move on, but every time i saw something that reminded me of you, it felt like⊠like i couldnât breathe. and then i thought, what if i never told you? what if i never got the chance?â
you stared at him for a long moment, your expression unreadable.
âsay something,â he pleaded as he cracks, his voice barely above a whisper.
you exhaled shakily, your fingers brushing against his as you handed the photo back. âi missed you,â you said finally, your voice thick with emotion.
a tear slipped down your cheek, and seungcheol reached out instinctively, his thumb brushing it away.
âdo you stillâŠ?â he trailed off, his voice faltering, not daring to fully ask you.
you nodded, your hand covering his. âyeah,â you said softly. âi do.â
his breath caught, hope blooming in his chest for the first time in what felt like years.
#seventeen#seventeen imagine#svt#svt x reader#seventeen fluff#svt fluff#fanfic#seventeen x reader#svt angst#seungcheol x reader#seventeen angst#angst seventeen#scoups agst#scoups fanfic#scoups fluff#scoups imagines#scoups seventeen#seventeen scoups#scoups x reader#scoups x you#seungcheol seventeen#seventeen seungcheol#choi seungcheol#seungcheol fluff#seungcheol angst#seungcheol imagines#seungcheol x you#choi seungcheol x reader#seungcheol#daisymbin: reqs
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hopeless romantic pedri trying his best to approach y/n but is afraid thinking sheâs into someone else
A Tu Vera â Pedri GonzĂĄlez.
Pairing: Pedri GonzĂĄlez x Fem!Reader
Summary: Heâs unsure about your feelings and struggles to interpret your actions, but your birthday gesture gives him the chance to hope that heâs wrong. That you do, in fact, like him.
Word Count: 1.10K+
Disclaimer/s â Nothing, itâs really just comfort, slight fluff?
A/N: So basically⊠I used the term approach as in like, he felt nervous to approach reader about the⊠situation? FUCK IDK I struggled horribly yet couldnât stop writing but whatever! ALSO. HIS BIRTHDAY HELLO. 22, bless the hell up! đđŸđ€
The day youâve been waiting for has finally come.
It was Pedriâs twenty-second birthday today. You had told him beforehand that you would stop by later on because he needed to stay and practice for his upcoming game tomorrow, and you didnât want to interrupt his time spent with his family.
Some time had passed when your phone buzzed with a message from him saying that he was, well, alone, so you could be on your way to him.
And you were! Your gift for him sat delicately on your passenger seat. Did you have to stop yourself from spending a lot on him? Yes! But this was Pedri; why wouldnât you go all out for him?
As you pull up, your eyebrows furrow in confusion when you see him standing on the porch, his gaze locking onto your car. You quickly get out and call out to him, âHello, why the hell are you outside?â
Now heâs looking at you as if youâve just asked the most stupidest question in the world. âYou were on your way. Of course Iâd be waiting outside.â He retorted, slowly making his way toward you.
âRight,â you smile and wrap your arms around him once youâre within reach. âHappy birthday!â
The man returns your hug almost immediately. He hums against you in appreciation, nestling his nose into the crook of your neck. The action easily causes your cheeks to flush ever-so-slightly.
âIâve got your gift in my car. Want to open now?â
âYeah,â he breathed, pulling away to his dismay.
Though his answer elicits a smile to spread across your lips⊠oh. He suddenly doesnât feel upset about having to break the hug so early anymore.
Grabbing his arm, you gently tug him with you as you quickly reach the car door. âOkay, first things first: unfortunately, I canât stay long. Secondly, feel free to let me know if you donât like whateverâs in here; I kept the receipt just in case!â
âDoubtful, but I got it,â he shrugged with a grin.
Sliding your hand under the bag, you lean forward to get a better grip on it. Then, you turn to face him, holding it out for him to take, and he does.
With the gift now in his arms, you walk side by side to the chairs he has already set up outside, due to his family coming over earlier. Once the two of you are seated, you turn towards him and motion for him to open it, but he just keeps his gaze fixed on your face. You feel sick. âGo on.â
Adjusting the bag on his lap, Pedri pries it open, a breathy laugh escaping his lips when he sees how overly decorated it is. He takes out the card first, about to open it when you speak, âYou can just read that later or something. Keep going, câmon!â
He smiles, removing the blue and red wrapping paper to reveal the blue Nike hoodie inside. âYou like hoodies, and you like the color blue, soâŠ!â
It was the simplest thing, yet it had him fighting the urge to overthink the entire situation. You were observant, he knew that. He needed to stop.
âThank you,â he says with a toothy-grin. âReally.â
âOf course. Thereâs one last thing at the bottom.â
The brunette lets out another laugh and removes more wrapping paper. His eyes widen slightly when he catches sight of the next gift, making you bite your bottom lip in nervous anticipation.
His gaze slowly trails up to lock with yours, and you tilt your head. âDo you like it? I noticed you were running low the other day, plus I knowââ
Pedri interjects, âI do, and I was. Itâsâthis is a lot.â
âDonât worry about that,â you assure. âNow you wonât have to worry about getting another one!â
The box suddenly feels heavy in his hands, the strip of the brand âPradaâ staring right at him. He nods slowly, âNo, I wonât. Thank you. Wow.â
âWow, huh? So, I take it you liked everything?â
Obviously, was he kidding? No, were you kidding?âReally? What gave you that idea? Yes, I loved it.â
With a chuckle, you nudge his foot with yours, eyes rolling in feigned annoyance, âHey, I can easily take it back. Tell me how your day was?â
âIt was good. I had a good practice, had a small dinner with my family, and now Iâm with you.â
Iâm with you? What? He couldâve cursed under his breath if you werenât right here. He knew he shouldnât have said that. If he thought it sounded weird, you probably thought it was even worse.
Heâs quick to take it back, âI didnâtâIâm sorry.â
âWhat? Itâs okay,â you tell him with a quirk of your brow. âSorry, what are you even apologizing for?â
He looks confused. âYouâre with him, arenât you?â
âHim?â You repeated. âIâm not seeing anybody.â
Not seeing anybody? âWhat about the guy with the blonde hair? The one you hung out with a lot.â
Thatâs when the person heâs talking about flickers through your mind, and now youâre smiling from ear-to-ear, âOh. Iâm not with him. I donât like him.â
âThen who?â He blurts out, instantly regretting his words. He didnât even actually know if you liked anyone to begin with. What was he doing?
You blow out a breath and stand up from your seat, with him following suit. âYouâre serious?â
Stick with it. âIâm serious. You donât have toââ
You refrain from letting your grin widen, nudging your head toward your car. He understands that youâre silently asking for him to walk you to it.
âWell! If itâs need-to-know,â you trail off, rounding your car and spinning on your heel to look at him once you reach the door. Your gaze flickers down to his lips for just a second, but that second is all he really needs for his breath to hitch in his throat.
To his semi-surprise, you reached up and placed a kiss on his cheek, sparing him one last knowing glance while you opened the door and got inside.
âLet me know if that answers your question. And, Pedri?â You pause; he hums. âHappy birthday.â
He stands there in silence. He had been so wrong. You werenât with the person he thought you were with, and he should have realized that when you showed up at his house this late, knowing full well you have to wake up early for your job tomorrow.
Pedri had been utterly mistaken, and he couldnât have been happier to be as wrong as he was.
Likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated ^_^.
DT(s) â @planetpedri + @gadriezmannsgirl + @spidybaby + @iovepoem + @joaoflms ! ౚà§
#pedri gonzĂĄlez#pedri gonzalez#pedri gonzĂĄlez x reader#pedri gonzalez x reader#pedri gonzalez x fem!reader#pedri gonzalez x you#pedri gonzalez x y/n#pedri gonzalez fluff#pedri gonzalez comfort#pedri gonzalez blurb#pedri gonzalez imagine#pedri gonzalez oneshot#pedri#pedri x reader#pedri x fem!reader#pedri x you#pedri x y/n#pedri fluff#pedri comfort#pedri blurb#pedri imagine#pedri oneshot#jilval#a tu vera - lola flores
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"Bilbo had assumed accusing an elven lord of Tookishness in his own house would result in swift decapitation and not a decades-long camaraderie that both parties truly cherished, but it seemed that in this regard too, the Lord of Imladris defied expectation."
The Peculiar and the Deranged: Moments between Bilbo Baggins, Elrond Peredhel, and the most unprecedented friendship in Middle-Earth, under the cut!
(aka this friendship wasnât leaving my mind so I wrote this on my phone and drew this with the 3 pencils I had on a train because Iâm incapable of being normal about anything)
on Bilbo's first visit to Imladris, featuring Estel's pet snake:
"You had a rat?" Bilbo blinked, hoping Elrond wouldn't notice the snake he was glaring at had initially been curled around his own neck. "Sir."
"I did not have a rat," corrected Elrond imperiously, looking every bit the lord of the valley. "I would never have a rat, I do not approve of rats. My daughter had a rat. Lothinvar, it was called, the bane of my household. Until this terrible creature wormed its way in. The snake that is, not the child, though Estel is not in my good books at the moment either."
on the return journey, after the death of Thorin Oakenshield:
"What can I do? How can I ever move past this?" Bilbo asked quietly, unsure why exactly he was pouring his heart out to a being six thousand years older than him, who must have faced far greater sorrows.
"Grief," Elrond replied, staring intently at him, "tricks you into thinking itâs all you have left. As though if you let it go, even for a moment, you betray him. You hold onto relics like lifelines, thinking what else is there to keep Thorin alive in your mind? It is a lonely life, Bilbo. It will turn you into the loneliest person in the world."
"Is there no way out?" he gasped, looking up at the elf.
"Start small. A smile, perhaps, when you think of a joke he made," Elrond said steadily, like he was reciting a recipe. âAnd then, try telling someone about him. Perhaps you could tell me. Something new each time you visit, perhaps.â
âYou say it like you have experience of it, sir,â ventured Bilbo. âLike you know it by-heart. Did you get past it?â
âI did,â Elrondâs voice was confident, too confident. Bilbo chose not to probe.
"Thorin's nephews?" Elrond asked later, after Bilbo had gathered himself together, mopped himself up. "They were slain too? Both?"
"Yes, both."
"That is good," Elrond had said with a blank, intense smile etched into his features. "That it was both at once."
"What?" Bilbo sat up in shock, spluttering. "Good? What is wrong with you?"
"Were they not twins? Thorin's nephews I recall were twins, no?"
"Brothers. But what difference does that make? What do you mean good? I beg your pardon, my lord, that's an unhinged thing to say!"
"Oh. I am sorry, Bilbo," Elrond shook his head, the awful, blank expression still on his face. "I am sorry, I spoke without thinking. It is only that I had thought they were twins. Do forgive me, I misunderstood, and spoke out of turn."
"Don't worry," Bilbo sighed, finding to his own surprise that he could manage a laugh. "With names like Fili and Kili, it's frankly a surprise they aren't."
He still thought it was a rather unhinged thing for Elrond to say, but, well â Bilbo Baggins had always been fond of the peculiar and the deranged.
on a visit to the Shire, sharing burnt scones
"Cel was â is â remarkable. She had an exceptional appetite for burnt bread: she would go into the kitchens and instruct the staff to deliberately burn sweetbreads, just because she loved the crunch, apparently."
"She sounds like a Shire lass through and through."
Elrond laughed, shaking his head: "I am certain had I brought her to visit, she would never leave. Though she is not made for the rustic life. A total terror of any creature on four legs. The first time I spotted her she was in a garden, standing on the bench screaming, because she had seen an enormous beetle scuttling around the grass."
"Oh, so it was a damsel in distress situation, eh?"
"Quite the contrary," he admitted. "She threw a pair of gardening scissors right at my head, and called me utterly disgusting for the crime of allowing beetles to exist on my property, and threatened to cut off my hair with the same scissors if she ever came across another one. And mind you, this is Celeborn's daughter, and that soul would have married an Ent if Galadriel hadn't come around."
"Well, that truly is a surprise! Did she not even like dear Arwen's little rat?"
"Oh, you remember the rat!" Elrond's eyes shone, genuinely delighted. "If I remember right, she paid our boys to get rid of it and told Arwen she had sent it to, well, your people."
"I will be certain to invent an illustrious Shire-based family tree for the rat, if your Arwen ever gets around to asking."
on a Yule visit, when Bilbo forwent self-preservation, featuring the same snake:
"Oh, it was not I who named the snake after the Mariner, it was my⊠other father."
"That's impressive, sir. Quite bohemian."
"One would wish," Elrond muttered darkly, pouring himself more wine, as if all the talk of snakes had driven him to drink. "Estel is friendly with Maglor, who along with Maedhros, raised my brother and I. And I had banned all talk of pet snakes until Maglor showed up last year with a present for Estel: his very own snake named Gil-Estel, which they both insist has nothing to do with the Mariner and is simply a play on the child's name. Which I would have believed, if Maglor did not also own a remarkably ugly cat named Thingol."
"When they say you are Half-Elven, Lord Elrond," Bilbo blurted out, after a short, surprised silence. "Do they mean the other half is merely mortal man, or�"
"Yes, the other half does indeed refer to mortal men," blinked Elrond in surprise, looking something other than perfectly composed for the very first time. "Do you⊠suspect otherwise?"
"Oh, I was certain there was a bit of Hobbit somewhere. Just your life, you know, your family, all of it," he waved his hands about the valley. "It's a little⊠well, Tookish."
"What in the world is a Took?"
on a midnight wander in Minas Tirith on the morning of Aragornâs wedding to Arwen
When Bilbo came across the figure sat on the steps, he was ridiculously old and his memory even more ridiculously ragged, so he didnât know why it was that he thought, reflexively, it will turn you into the loneliest person in the world. He didn't say a word though, only reached out a hand and sat beside the figure. Elrond didnât say a word, only grasped the offered fingers so tightly Bilbo's knuckles turned white, held on as he shook. When it passed, he looked away and apologised, sniffing. "Forgive me, my friend, I do not mean to get melancholic, especially not on a day of such joy. I â"
Bilbo cut across him, too old to deal with the elvish tendency to be completely insufferable.
âHow did you get past it the last time? With your brother?â
"I have one of the longest memories in this land, yet I cannot truly remember this one thing," the elf smiled bitterly, tapping his nails on the stone steps. "I slept, I think. A lot. I shrunk out of the world until the sheer pain of it no longer clawed at me. But I cannot do that, Bilbo. Now, I have duties, responsibilities. I have kings to oversee, a valley to hand over and a people for whom I must keep up something of a brave face. There is no longer any room for the small death I was permitted last time."
Elrond sighed. "You must think I am terribly privileged, or that I have too grandiose an idea about my place in this world."
"No, I was just thinking how unfair it is," said Bilbo quietly. "So unfair that for you there is a last time and now a this time."
Elrond, in tears again, was looking at him with an almost obscene gratefulness, as if Bilbo had done him some enormous kindness and not something any friend would do, looked at him in a way that made the hobbit think again, inexplicably, the loneliest person in the world.
âIâm sorry,â said the lord, catching his friendâs expression. âYou should not be h-â
"Shut up," Bilbo huffed, looking truly offended, rolling his eyes. "You're insufferable, do you know that? Stop acting like you've jumped off a damned cliff before my eyes, Elrond. I'm starting to think elven history would have been a lot less bloody and tragic had more of you â and I mean that FĂ«anor, mainly, but the rest of you too â appreciated the value of a good cry. Emotional constipation is just as bad as the real thing, you know. And you can be sure I'll tell old FĂ«anor that to his face when I see him."
Elrond blinked, then laughed. "Oh, Bilbo, I am glad you found your way back to Imladris this year, I truly am."
"And I, in turn,â Bilbo found himself saying, cursing the fact that his memory decided to make its wondrous reappearance that night. âAm equally glad our mutual friend Aragorn tried to bribe me to put his pet snake in your office that very first day."
on a ship in the sundering seas, far too early
"Suffering from a spot of morning sickness, are we?"
"My apologies, Bilbo," Elrond stumbled back into Bilbo's cabin from the privy, looking only slightly less green than he had when he left it. "Please do not make any sudden movements."
"I am only pleased that you and I are now such intimate friends that you feel comfortable enough to throw up your breakfast in my bathroom. Maybe you should come around and do it every morning to wake me up, like the worldâs most useless cockerel."
"It was not by choice, as you very well know," Elrond muttered, downing a swig of ground herbs and honey from a bottle in his pocket. "My mortal heritage does, unfortunately, mean there are some weaknesses to the constitution. Perhaps this is why it was Elros who took ship for Numenor and not I."
"Well, that, and you couldn't resist micromanaging six thousand years of Middle-Earth now, could you?" chortled Bilbo, settling down in a plush chair and laying his walking stick by his side. "Mortality is all well and good, but heaven forbid you lose a chance to develop domestic policy over the continental grain trade. Besides, and I don't want to be the one who brings it up, butâŠ"
"Elbereth, what now?"
"Your father was known as the Mariner, you know," Bilbo snorted. "As in, the seafaring sort, no? It would truly be such a shame if someone were to⊠write a poem about the mis-inheritance of seasiâ"
"Write that poem, Bilbo Baggins, and I will personally petition Ulmo to turn you into seaweed."
in the house of Elrond in Aman, with the chattiest woman Bilbo has ever encountered (which is saying something)
"I only burned that layer because you made me do it, mind you. You really are as remarkable as he said you were," Bilbo blurted out as she picked out pink sugared biscuits with a dark crust that he knew to be from burning. He had even spread jam on them for a second layer of sweetness. "Mad and irritating, to be frank, but remarkable. I am truly glad to know you, CelebrĂŹan â not as Elrond's wife, but, well."
He gestured at her weakly, meant the peculiar and the deranged. She understood.
"Yes, I do pity all the folk that know me as Elrond's dead wife," she wrinkled her nose, sitting down by him and grabbing a second burnt biscuit. "And considering my poor husband's approach to grieving, and all the laments Lindir said he's made him compose, that is what most end up knowing me as. It is quite a pity, I am as you say, delightful. Oh, Bilbo, this is amazing! So wonderful, I didn't think pastries could be this sweet!â
"No, not when your cheapskate of a husband is in charge of the rations," he said in a carrying whisper. "In the Shire though, we know how to live."
"Who are we referring to as a cheapskate then?"
"The elf who implemented a sugar tax in his valley," said Celebrian dryly. "You may know him. Have a biscuit!"
"I would truly rather nail myself to the birch," he said dryly, picking up a piece of bread. "I do not get the logic behind oversweetening victuals. Impractical, unnecessary."
"Oh," CelebrĂan clapped her hands to her mouth. "Of course! The Lord Elrond grew up amidst the War of Wrath! Surely, he has not mentioned that to you, has he? He never does!"
"Ah, that he was raised in military conditions by a couple of kinslayers?" chuckled Bilbo. "No, not at all. Not once. He certainly never brought it up in our first ever conversation. Should we ask him to expand?"
#lord of the rings#elrond peredhel#bilbo baggins#bagginshield#celrond#lotr#the hobbit#balrogballs writes#balrogballs art
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đ°đąđđĄ đđĄđ đ„đąđ đĄđ đšđđ | đŹ. đ«đđąđ
đŹđźđŠđŠđđ«đČ: spencer takes care of you after a serious accident.
đđšđ§đđđ§đđŹ/đ©đšđđđ§đąđđ„ đđ°: hospital, rehabilitation, neck and brain injury, nud1ty
đ/đ§: this is one of the potential endings of my fanfiction "with the light off" which officialy remains open up to your own interpretation. this version written to comfort all the hearts i've broken <3
đ°đšđ«đđŹ: 11k
Spencer felt embarrassed by how, just an hour after leaving the apartment, he already wanted to call her.
She had already occupied a near-constant presence in the back of his mind, slipping in like a shadowâelusive and playfulâdarting between his thoughts, flitting from one corner to another whenever he tried, even briefly, to forget about her. But now? After that night they had spent together?
Spencer knew a lot about obsession. He understood the weight of the word and was acutely aware of its gravity. Yet he couldnât deny itâhe was obsessed with her. Physical contact had always been a sensitive yet profoundly significant subject for him. He didnât allow many people that close.Â
For him, touch was the ultimate proof of closeness and trust. Intimacy bred attachment. This wasnât about desire in its rawest formâit was something else⊠though he wasnât entirely sure what. He couldnât define the bond they shared.
He felt bored, detached from the world when she wasnât in it, and the only thing keeping him tethered to some semblance of normality was the thoughtâthe imaginingâthat at this very moment, they were breathing the same air.
He was starting to think he might be losing his mind.
He held off on calling her precisely to avoid coming across as a lunatic in her eyes. He managed to restrain himself only once he was at work, where the seriousness of his profession demanded it. In a way, though, he felt lighter. Throughout the day, he was buoyed by the thought of their upcoming meeting, the excitement it broughtâand the nerves. That mixture of emotions was enough to make the entire team glance at him with curiosity.
Garcia was handing out case files, her hair recently dyed a vibrant shade of red. Rossi, instead of opening his folder like everyone else, was watching Spencer from across the table, leaning on his elbow.
âDid you win the lottery or something?â he asked, so unexpectedly that Spencer glanced around at the others, unsure who the question was meant for.
When he realized the question was directed at him, he swallowed hard. Morganâs raised eyebrow seemed to challenge him to a duel.
âNot that I know of. Why?â
âBecause youâre practically glowing, sweetheart,â Penelope chimed in with a sly smile. âDonât think youâre getting away without telling me everything later. Iâll get it out of you, donât you worry. But for now, letâs get startedâŠâ
They immersed themselves in the case, but a few hours later, during a brief moment of downtime, he realized he was looking for an excuse to call her. Was a simple desire to ask what she was up to reason enough?
He wondered if she was still at his apartment. He hoped she was. He knew sheâd eventually have to leave to prepare for the shift she was starting later that afternoon, but he couldnât shake the unease gnawing at him about the whole situation with her roommateâs ex-boyfriend.
Realizing heâd been staring at his phone for far too long and that heâd soon need to get back to work, he made a snap decision and called.
But no one answered.
Logically, he reasoned that mornings were probably her time to sleep. Afterward, he tried sending a text message. But by late evening, when he finally returned to his apartment, he was starting to feel genuinely worried.
The question nagged at him: could it have been about the previous night? Maybe heâd done or said something wrong, something that had put her off completely?
Slowly, he walked into the bedroom, pausing in the doorway as his eyes landed on the perfectly made bed. It definitely hadnât looked like that when he left it.
Then his gaze fell on the slightly ajar safe, and he froze. The combination was incredibly complicated, so he must have left it open when he took out his gun and badge. Besides those items, there was one more thing inside.
He had once again fallen into the trap of keeping Dilaudid close, even though he wasnât using it. Was it possible she found it, and thatâs why she hadnât reached out?
It wasnât that he had lied to her about being clean. She had seen how much effort it took for him to talk about it, so she approached the subject with incredible subtlety, never asking directly, but watching him closely, carefully, yet without pressing.
If she had really found it in his safe, she might have felt betrayed. Or maybe she decided she didnât want to get involved with someone who had such a problem. Perhaps she had seen the whole previous night as one big mistake and then decided to throw him out of her life. Spencer, though it pained him, couldnât help but feel that he deserved it.
He sat on the bed, crushed by his own thoughts. Something didnât sit right with the version of events he had imagined. First and foremost, she wasnât the type of person who would turn him away because of this. Her heart ached to help others; she couldnât ignore someone elseâs troubles. Even if he had hurt her, her immense capacity for understanding would have remained intact. Empathy was imprinted on her, like a deep, unshakable mark.
Driven by a hunch, he reached for his phone to call her again. Thatâs when he noticed two missed calls from an unknown number, just fifteen minutes ago.
He pressed the phone to his ear, his brow furrowing in confusion as he heard the first sound on the other end⊠a sob?
The sound went on and on, and Spencer was too confused to utter a single word.
âWho am I talking to?â he finally asked. Unable to stop himself, he stood up. He didnât even know what was going on or who he was talking to, but he sprang to his feet anyway. His body compelled him, his insides twisting with unpleasant spasms.
It could just as well have been some stupid prank. The problem was, it wasnât.
âH-hey, itâs J-Jude,â a voice came from the other end. Female, shaky, and choked with sobs so severe that if he didnât already know her name, he would never have guessed he was speaking to her roommate. He stopped pacing the room. âI-it was meâŠI called earlier. S-she doesnât have anyâŠany family, and I didnât knowâŠI didnât know who to informâŠI canât handle this on my ownâŠthey just took her away againâŠâ
It wasnât as if the world suddenly came to a halt. It simply became both sharper and blurrier at the same time. Spencer could see that single, bright strand of hair on the pillow with perfect clarity, yet his own legs seemed out of reach. When he looked down, all he saw was darkness stretching below him. Somehow, he was still breathing.
âWhat are you talking about?â he asked. Later, he couldnât explain how his voiceâthose first wordsâhad sounded so composed. âW-who took her⊠where⊠and whyâŠ?
âI have no fucking idea!â she shouted, followed by a long silence during which Jude took a desperate gasp of air. âI mean, I do, I do know! They just brought her in, but... but suddenly they took her back because there was some kind ofâŠbleedingâŠâ
â...ding?â he blurted out, the first syllable swallowed entirely by his panic.
âNo, I donât want anything to calm me down, I am calm, canât you tell?â Her voice grew distant, as if sheâd pulled the phone away from her mouth. Then it came back, clear and pleading. âPlease, come hereâŠâ
She hung up. The phone slipped from his hand as if it burned him. In a frenzy, he bent down to grab it, only to drop it again. Finally, he fell to his knees, managing at last to pick it up. As he stood, he felt as though some substance was spreading through his brainâblack, toxic, and utterly destructive. Its effects left him barely tethered to reality. He could hear and see, but everything was overlaid with Judeâs words, looping in his mind like printed text on a screen.
The next thirty minutes were a blur.
How could it be logically explained that, in a state of complete detachment from the outside world, he somehow managed to figure out, based on the map of the area imprinted in his memory, which specific hospital she was in? How did his panicked, trembling hands manage to cover that distance by car without causing an accident?
The only thing he knew was that he ended up at the nearest hospital, wearing just a shirt with no outer layer. It was shocking that he even had shoes on.Â
He should have been looking for the woman who had called him, demanding every bit of information she had. But somehow, instinctively, his eyes searched for someone elseâa familiar face. He prayed it was all some sort of misunderstanding. Maybe he was fooling himself, hoping to spot her among the people passing by. A part of him simply refused to accept the possibility that anything could have happened to her.
Nothing had happened.
She was fine.
Her blue eyes were soaking in the surroundings, their gaze carrying that faint sparkle that always appeared at night. Maybe there was even a smile on her lips. He couldnâtâwouldnâtâallow himself to imagine what might have happened to her. It felt as though the universe itself should be ashamed for ever entertaining the thought of harming her.
"Are you family?" the man at reception asked. Spencer nodded. "I'm sorry, but I can't provide you with any information,"
"Just tell me, is she alive?"
"I can'tâŠ"
"Just fucking tell meâŠ"
"Theyâre operating on her right now," a voice spoke from behind him. Spencer turned and blinked. Only then did he realize he was in a hospital. Before, heâd only had a goalâan urgent need to get there. The surroundings were just beginning to take shape in his mind. He had never seen this woman before, but he guessed it had to be Jude. Her face was swollen from crying, but she seemed less shaken than during their call. She had probably accepted the sedatives. "Again. First, they spent almost four hours working on her neck⊠they said she was stable, asleep, but then suddenly there was that bleeding⊠I watched them take her out of the room right in front of meâŠ"
âDid you see her?â
Unexpectedly, she hid her face in her hands.
âI didnât know who to call. She mentioned you a few times, and I had your number, and I didnât know what to doâŠâ she began explaining chaotically, as if it mattered at all. âItâs my fault, you know, all of this is my fucking faultâŠâ
They were standing right in front of the receptionist, blocking his access to others who needed help. Spencer snapped back to the moment, pulling her a few steps aside.
âW-what did you say? That they operated on her for four hours?â
âYes, the first timeâŠâ
So, she had been there for at least four hours. Longer, considering the time needed after surgery before visiting a patient. Pain spread across his chest. While he was wondering why she hadnât answered his calls, coming to various conclusions, she had been fighting for her life?
He... had been at work, moving around, talking to others, living, while all of this was happening? He felt as if... as if he had betrayed her. It was absurd, even he knew that. Despite the state he was inâtragic, to be preciseâhe understood just how absurd that thought was. But he couldnât stop the guilt and shame that washed over him every time he tried to imagine her on the operating table while he had been completely unaware of her condition.
âI need to sit down," Jude muttered, and after a moment, they found themselves on narrow chairs lined along the hospital walls. Spencer barely managed to force his knees to bend, his body to settle into the seat.
He was only beginning to adjust to the foreign gravity that was pressing down on him.
In his head, there was only one thought, one resolution, one desire. The only thing that could save him from losing his mind in this waiting room.
"I need to see her."
"We have to wait," Jude replied, pressing her hand to her forehead. More tears appeared in her eyes. She wasnât just terrified, she was completely falling apart. "We... we once gave each other permission to access information about our health. You know, in case of an accident. The doctors told me everything. A neck sprain. A concussion. Two broken ribs and a broken forearm." Although her speech had been unclear earlier, when she listed the injuries, she sounded like a movie announcer.
Spencer quickly realized that these words must have been echoing in her head since they were first told to her. The same thing had been happening to him. Each word was like a blow delivered with full force, and his extensive medical knowledge wasnât helping him avoid panic. He was too aware of the danger and too aware of the suffering her poor body must have endured.
They both squeezed their eyes shut tightly. Spencer felt as though his temples might explode. Waiting. Was there anything worse in the world than waiting? Being stuck in ignorance, teetering between uncertainty, relief, and utter despair? Feeling all of it at once?
"How did this even happen?" he asked the woman sitting next to him.
He was sure he already knew the answer to that question. She didnât even need to say it. It was enough to see how she dropped her gaze, heavy with pain, and how tightly her jaw clenched.
âShe... fell down the stairs.â
Spencer wanted to scoff at the understatement. The real version of events couldnât pass Judeâs lips, but in some way, he considered that a blessing. If Jude had openly admitted that she had been pushed, he might have crumbled under the weight of the fury flooding him. But for now, his anger didnât matter. Only the passing time did.
He felt as if he hadnât taken a single breath since leaving his apartment. Leaning his head back in his seat, he endured what felt like two whole days, then glanced at his watch only to realize that exactly forty-seven seconds had passed.
Timeâa relative concept. In physics and in human perception. Einstein had proven it, and so had that particular moment.
He started to fear that he might never leave the waiting room. Memories and emotions began to blur together. He formed a theory: that he had been trapped there for quite some timeâweeks, perhaps. Back when another loved one had been on the operating table, and heâd been losing his mind in much the same way.
Could it be that, under the strain of this torturous waiting, heâd lost his sanity? That his brain, desperate for relief, had simply imagined everything that followed? The trip to the library that night, finding himself at her door, the string lights on the Christmas tree, the Venus flytrap, the bar, opening the door that night and seeing her on the stairwellâat once flushed from a night spent at the club and chilled from the December air?
And now that illusion had simply shattered, like a fragment of broken glass. He was back in the waiting room again, waiting, hurting too muchâand yet feeling as though he had no right to. His pain was nothing compared to what she was going through. He should be doing something, anything, to make himself useful, to not succumb to the weight of his own helplessness.
When the doctor finally approached them, Spencer almost knocked over his chair in his haste to stand. The doctor, however, focused solely on Jude as he delivered the update, leaving Spencer questioning whether he even existed.
âWe managed to stop the bleeding. Thatâs the good news,â he began, his dark eyes unreadableâat once cool and concerned, with the practiced composure characteristic of people in his profession.
âThank God,â Jude whispered, rubbing her chest as if trying to calm the frantic beating of her heart.
Spencer, on the other hand, felt no relief. Not even a sliver.
"âThatâs good news,â" he repeated the doctorâs words, drawing the manâs gaze to him. âBut⊠but is there something bad?â
That brief moment before the doctor answered felt longer than nearly the past two hours of waiting.
âDue to suspected brain swelling, we had to induce a coma.â
âWhat?â Jude mouthed silently. âHow⊠how could she be in a coma? Why? Was that necessary?â
âThey needed to reduce the intracranial pressure,â Spencer replied, the words spilling from his mouth without him even realizing he was speaking. âThe coma prevents further damage and minimizes the brainâs oxygen consumption. But will she⊠how long will sheâŠ?â
âOnly for a few days,â the doctor assured him, understanding the question he couldnât quite form. âAs long as there are no further complications or additional bleeding. But I can reassure you for now: thereâs no indication of that. Her condition seems stable. She was⊠incredibly lucky. It was a serious accidentâa miracle, a sheer miracleâthat she didnât break her spine.â"
For a moment, he couldnât utter a single word, his throat still tight, and the relief never came. He knew he wouldnât feel it until he saw her, fully conscious and awake. Until that happened, he would grimace every time he heard the word miracle.Â
"When will I be able to see her?" he asked, surprisingly calm and composed. The question was so important to him that his voice didnât tremble even once. In fact, it was the only thing that mattered right now.
"Youâll need to wait a few hours before visiting. We have to make sure thereâs no risk of a sudden deterioration in her condition. Also, only authorized individuals can visit her."
The last part of the doctorâs statement felt almost like a slap in the face.
"How many hours?" he pressed, impatience creeping into his voice. "Two? Four? Six?"
"Please, calm down," the doctor asked, making a gesture with his hand.
âEight?â
His voice grew increasingly sharp, desperately demanding an answer. The doctor opened his mouth to respond, but Jude interrupted with a question.
"As an authorized person, can I, on behalf of the patient, allow him to visit?" she asked, catching Spencerâs gaze for a brief moment before quickly turning away. "She would want this, I know it."
The doctor shook his head in refusal, providing them with a few more details about the surgery before turning to leave. Spencer watched him leave, something in him wavering between a sigh and a snort. So they wouldnât even let him visit her? He understood the hospital procedures and rules perfectly well, but when it came to his own case, he hated them with all his heart. They wouldnât allow him to see someone who meant so much to him, simply because they werenât bound by blood or a ring on his finger. A ring on his finger⊠maybe he should lie and say they were engaged? Although, would it really make any difference in the eyes of the hospital staff?
Before the loose fragments in his mind began to form a plan, he noticed that Jude was staring at him. She had sat down again, pressing her back tightly against the chair's backrest. She hadnât cried for a while now; a certain relief had settled on her face when she heard the surgery had been successful, but then the old devastation returned, stronger than ever before.
"I wonât be able to visit her," she said, her voice hollow. "Not even while sheâs unconscious. And when she wakes up, look her in the eyes. Tell me, how could I do that after everything? After all of this was my fault?"
Spencer turned away and walked off.
He knew that if he didnât, something inside him would break. He couldnât stop the anger he felt toward Jude. From what he knew, she had repeatedly refused to report her ex-boyfriend to the police, perhaps more or less aware of the danger he posed. She had the right to do so, theoretically. But that didnât change the fact that someone else had suffered because of her foolish decision.
In his eyes she deserved the guilt she felt.
Not knowing what to do with himself, he found a place far from her, far from anyone, where he spent the next few hours, hardly moving. Sometimes he observed the relatives of other patients in the hospital, also broken, but he had some selfish feeling that even they wouldnât understand what he felt. He placed himself on some distant, elite orbit of suffering and felt almost embarrassed by it.Â
Pain always makes sure that a person feels as lonely and misunderstood as possible in it. That is when it has the most power over them.
He kept away from the windows, the darkness outside, slowly losing its intensity, putting him into a state of shock and contemplation. Maybe time was a relative concept, but that didnât change the fact that it existed. Somewhere far away, there was light beyond this waiting room.
For some time now, he had been occupied with a certain task. He was aware of the hours passing and how, with them, his desperation grew. He felt he would go mad if he didnât see her. The designated time during which the patient should be ensured complete rest after surgery had ended, yet he knew they wouldnât let him in to see her. But he had a brain for a reason, right?"
He found the room where everything that mattered to him at that moment was. A young doctor was just leaving.
"Excuse me, ma'am,â he approached her politely, trying to appear calm, though his appearance and trembling hands clearly suggested otherwise. âI need to visit this patient.â
âAre you a relative?â
âNo, actuallyâŠâ He knew this was a desperate move and resorting to a lie, but he didnât care. What was morality in his situation? Just a word. He reached for the badge he had with him and cleared his throat. âIâm with the FBI. Iâve been assigned to see this particular patient; itâs a matter that cannot be delayed."
Believe it or not, but people often lost their minds at the mere mention of the FBI. Spencer suspected that such a young doctor might have some gaps in experience and not know what procedures were in place in such a situation.
The surprised woman took a half step back.
âBut sheâs in a comaâŠâ she said uncertainly, turning toward the room. âAre you sure itâs this patient?â
âAbsolutely. And as I said, thereâs no time to waste.â
He didnât put his badge away, still holding it raised, with a serious expression on his face, as if he were interrogating someone. It was clear she was torn with doubt, but fortunately for him, she decided to give in without consulting the decision.
Spencer almost ran into the room, unable to hold back his impatience any longer. At first, he felt as if in a dream, one where you achieve your greatest goal. However, it quickly turned into a nightmare, all because of what he saw.
Whatever he had imagined, he was not prepared for this sight.Â
Especially because before he even noticed her face, the face he was so desperate to see, he first noticed everything else surrounding it. The hospital equipment, the machines and devices monitoring her vital signs. The wide orthopedic collar tight around her neck. The sterile whiteness of it all, obscuring her and making her almost disappear against its backdrop. It wasnât until he approached the bed, his legs weak and unsteady, that he started to look at her, but again, not specifically at her, but at the injuries. The sight of swollen temples, the sunken eyes, pale and dry lips, skin like a sheet of paper. Every injury on her body caused him unimaginable pain, so intense it almost stopped him from breathing. He felt so much anger and injustice that she had to go through this that he almost wanted to fall to his knees and apologize to her, beg for forgiveness. For what? He couldnât decide. It wasnât a need driven by logic, it was something deep inside him.
And thatâs what he did, even though there was a place beside the bed where he could sit. He slowly knelt down, his hands touching the edge of the bed, but not her body. After all, he wasnât about to risk causing her any pain due to his lack of control. But he had such an overwhelming desire to take her hand, the one whose fingers shyly peeked out from under the cast.
"I should have gone with you," he said, after about five minutes spent in complete silence, undisturbed even by his breath, which he was holding back. "I should have. Walked you to the door and made sure you got inside safely. Iâm sorryâŠ"
He felt that with his pitiful apologies, he was disturbing her peace. She needed it to fully rest. So, he fell silent again, alternating between looking at her with furrowed brows in tender concern and resting his forehead against the edge of the bed whenever the sight became too painful. While before, time seemed to crawl at the slowest possible pace, now it was racing forward wildly.
In his perception, barely a minute had passed when someoneâs presence appeared behind him. He turned over his shoulder, noticing the young nurse who had let him in, and it took him a long time before he even realized it. After all, he had lied to her, saying it was some professional matter, yet she had found him kneeling by the hospital bed.
He quickly got to his feet, nervously rubbing his face.
âFor the patientâs well-being, no visits should last longer than twenty minutes,â the woman said surprisingly gently, leaning slightly against the door with her shoulder. An unidentified expression lingered in her eyes, making them seem...warm.
He didnât answer, just nodded. He no longer felt the need to play that little charade that had helped him get inside. He allowed himself one last long moment, looking at her face, peaceful in sleep. He passed the doctor in the doorway, feeling her eyes turn to him, and he did the same, out of curiosity. She smiled, sadly and with compassion.
"This had nothing to do with any FBI assignment, right?â
Her understanding seemed almost touching. However, Spencer, caught in the moment, quickly withdrew, once again making his way down the hospital corridors, now completely unsure of what to do with himself. He leaned against one of the walls, slowly feeling the fatigue from the entire night spent waiting to see her. He found his phone in his pocket, realized it was already morning, and that⊠Hotch had called him.
It was a quick collision with the outside world. He called back, as nothing else came to mind that he could focus on.
"Reid," the serious voice of his boss came through on the other end. "Why arenât you at work, and why arenât you answering?"
He needed to take a breath before he could respond.
"Sorry, Hotch," he said, trying not to sound weak, but thatâs exactly how he sounded. Weak, a little pitiful, and on the verge of exhaustion. "Something... something really important happened, and... I... I wonât be able to come in today..."
Spencer realized he had no idea how to explain himself in this situation.
"I canât remember the last day you were even late. What happened?" He didnât answer. "Where are you?" Silence. "Spencer."
"Itâs... a personal matter."
There was a brief silence from his boss, and Spencer could almost imagine how he furrowed his dark brows in confusion.
"I understand." His voice was tense, but not with disapproval, which surprised Spencer. More with... concern. Had he managed to read the seriousness of the situation just from his voice? Probably, after all, he was the best profiler Spencer knew. "Youâll need to explain later, but for now... take care of yourself. Do you need any help?â
He assured him insincerely that everything was fine and found an empty chair to sit in, hunched over. A strong pressure formed in his head, amplified by the helplessness and uncertainty about what he should do next. She was in a coma, and according to the doctor, she would be in it for the next few days. And what was he supposed to do during that time? He felt that physically, he could spend another hundred hours on that specific chair. Occasionally stretching his legs. It was his plan, one that seemed more real with every passing minute. At least, until a figure cast its shadow over him.
"Reid," a familiar voice spoke.
He looked up, surprised, at Morgan. His mouth was slightly open in confusion, his forehead deeply furrowed.
"What are you doing here?"
"How... how did you know where I was?" That was the first thing that came to his mind.
"Penelope. How she knew, I have no idea, but Iâm starting to suspect that her joke about having us all chipped wasnât really a joke. But anyway, whatâs going on? Hotch told me you called, and you sounded... unsettling."
His friend was watching him closely. His wrinkled clothes, his tired face.
"So... Hotch sent you to find me?"
"Reid, youâre our friend. Did you really think we wouldnât be worried about you?"
Spencer lowered his head, listening to his words. Derek was silent for a moment, his hands resting on his hips, his tense face scanning the surroundings. After a while, he focused his gaze back on him.
"Who is the person youâre visiting?"
He hesitated before answering, not because he didnât want to share the information, but because he wasnât sure how to refer to her. What should he call her? After all, it wasnât like they were in an official relationship, and the word friend seemed to leave something unsaid.
âSomeone... someone very important to me. She had an accident. She has... a cervical spine injury, and the doctors, suspecting brain swelling, decided to put her into a coma for a while.â
Morgan's eyes widened.
âDamn, Reid. Iâm so... Iâm so sorry.â
He sat down on the empty chair beside him, his face still showing shock. Exhausted, Spencer simply rested his head on his knees, no longer able to keep his posture straight. He felt drained, yet at the same time, he couldnât bring himself to leaveâcouldnât leave herâŠ
Morganâs hand fell onto his back, and finally, then sighed.
âCome here, man.â
With a firm pull, he drew him into an embrace.
Spencer found it hard to admit, even to himself, how much he needed this. No words left their mouths for a long while; only that brotherly, supportive embrace remained between them.
âHave you seen her?â Morgan asked after a while.
He confirmed, but didnât reveal the circumstances. His friend paused for a moment, as if he wanted to say something but hesitated.
âOkay, listen to me. You need to get back to yourself.â
Spencer scoffed and shook his head, ready to argue.
âLet me finish. I know you donât want to leave her right now, but with all due respect, you look like death. You need to eat and get some sleep.â
âI canât,â Spencer replied firmly.
âYouâre going to collapse soon. You said sheâll be in a coma for a few days. You wonât make it sitting here, think realistically. No oneâs asking you to go back to work, you just need to rest.â He looked at him seriously, knowing how hard it would be to convince him. Finally, he sighed once more. âDo it for her, alright? Do you really think sheâd want you to wear yourself out like this?â
He had no ready answer for that. Well, he did, but it sounded like no, she wouldnât want that.
âIâll take you home. For Godâs sake, you came here without even a coat?â
It's a strange feeling to let someone take care of you. Completely. Derek not only drove him to his apartment but also came inside with him. There was no emotional discussion between them, which he found to be a relief. Silent support, he thought.
His relationship with the other team members had been tested after Emily's deathâor at least, that's what he had thought up until now. He had begun isolating himself, not wanting to intrude on their grief or burden them with his own problems. But in realityâsomething he hadnât seen until nowâit had been the opposite. It strengthened their bond.
The next few days revolved mainly around hospital visits. Somehow, he had managed to gain visiting rights, and the time spent by her side filled him with a certain sense of calm. He could see how stable her vital signs were, and he clung to the doctorsâ reassurances that she would regain consciousness in just a few days.
He once read a series of articles and interviews with people who had been in comas. Their accounts sometimes contradicted medical facts and often included embellishments, but a significant number of them mentioned remembering the voices of loved ones and certain sounds.
He didnât want her to remember only the sounds of medical equipment from this period. But he also wasnât sure what he could talk to her about. Would she want to hear about the overly salted carbonara that Garcia had forced an entire pot of on him? Or about the abstract mural being painted across from his apartmentâsomething he was sure she would have liked?
In the end, he decided to read to her, though choosing what to read proved challenging. Sleeping Beauty seemed too ironic, even though she would probably laugh about it later. She had once told him Girl, Interrupted was her favorite book, but its hospital setting made him suspect she might prefer something that let her escape this place, even if only in her imagination. The Silence of the Lambs referenced one of their past conversations, but if a doctor overheard him reading it to her, he would surely be banned from visiting altogether.
âAll right,â he began one day, sitting down in the chair by her bed. âI know youâre not a big fan of fantasy. And yes, youâll have every right to call me out on this when you wake up. But still, I hope youâll like it.â
Arabian Nights was a collection of tales and stories originating from the Middle East, India, and Persia. Somehow, he assumed that the mysterious, often nocturnal atmosphere might resonate with her, even soothe her. After all, night had always been her favorite time of dayâthe backdrop to so much of her life.
That day, as he was about to leave, he leaned slightly over her bed, lowering his voice to a whisper.
"Tomorrow, I'll read you a romance, how does that sound? But Iâll have to go to the bookstore because, despite your beliefs, I donât have any in my collection. I wish Iâd had more time to get to know your reading preferences better."
During none of his previous visits had he touched her, afraid it might disturb her peace in some negative way. Besides... in the state she was in, she looked so fragile and delicate that he feared even the slightest touch could hurt her. But that time, he simply couldnât hold back. After a long internal struggle, he placed a very brief kiss on her forehead.
Spencer couldnât keep his promise. While he did buy a romance novel recommended to him with enthusiasm by a young bookstore clerk, he never had the chance to read it to her.
The next day, he received a message.Â
She had woken up.Â
*
You didnât remember much.
Only fragmented scraps. The memories began with a brief moment of complete physical helplessness, a terrible pain in your neck, and a series of flashing lights mingling with raised voicesâeven shouting. Then came silence, vile and terrifying.
But that wasnât the end. Something came after the silence.
Softly spoken stories. For some reason, they were comforting. In your mind, only a few blurred images remainedâno clear events or words. What you remembered most was that soothing, calm voice. It felt like an embrace, like warm bedding, the first rays of cosmic light piercing through clouds, or the gentle chill of evening air.
It was⊠beautiful. But it couldnât last forever. After an indeterminate amount of time, your body decided to reject that comfort and tried to open its eyes. It was an excruciating effort. You sighed with the strain. The first colors and surreal shapes began to appear before you. Slowly, you started to become aware of your existence, yet at the same time, you felt suspended somewhere outside your body and mindâalone and terrified.
The sensations were both faint and overwhelmingly intense, making you want to hide, to somehow cut yourself off from them. Yet you were equally afraid to close your eyes again. You muttered things that made no sense. You remained in this panicked state until two tiny brown points hovered above you, widening with concern. Only then were you able to calm downâat least enough to stop straining your body with attempts to move. Attempts, because your body seemed entirely unwilling to follow your commands.
The fear buried itself deep within you, drilling into your chest. At first, it suffocated you, but eventually, it began to weaken and fade.
This was how the first hours after waking from the coma unfolded.
Weakness, disorientation, mumbling, pain, discomfort, and light sensitivity.
It took a long time before you regained awareness of being in a hospital. Even more time passed before you remembered why. And then, your own condition and state.
You were so incredibly weak that it filled you with disgust, terrified by how much effort even the smallest movement requiredâlike the twitch of a finger or the blink of an eye. Frustrated by it all, you cried, and he cried too. But his tears were born of relief and joy.
Those two specific emotions reached you the latestâonly after they transferred you to a different ward, and your thoughts began to clear. Relief and joy. Hand in hand with fear and anxiety.Â
It felt so unreal, yet it was realâreal like nothing else, and it held you tightly, exactly the way you needed it to.
*
Spencer was aware that her awakening was just another step in a very long journey.
His medical knowledge, modestly speaking, was fairly extensive, and he understood the gravity of the injuries she had sustained. Their first meeting after she had opened her eyes for the first time was nothing like a scene from a movie. She was confused, still drowsy, and as she slowly started to comprehend everything, she was primarily terrified. Her body, after the time spent in the coma, though brief, was extremely weak, and every little movement exhausted her as though she had just run a marathon.
The fear on her face pierced his chest.
He had the impression that none of the words he spoke, almost whispered in an attempt to calm her, were having any effect.
"I... I can't move," she stammered as one of the first things she said. Her eyes intensely focused on his face, searching for safety in it, and he feared he wouldn't be able to provide it for her.
"It's just temporary," he reassured her gently, leaning over her bed and trying to smile, but it came out uncertain, he was too worried about her condition. "The doctors say so, and that's the truth. Your body is just very weak right now."
"Will... will it be like this forever?"
"No, no, it will pass. I promise, it will pass," he nodded fervently. She hesitated and took a breath, as though discovering an entirely new action. But as soon as she did, out of fear, it became fast and irregular. He was terrified that his touch might cause her pain, but he didn't know what else he could do to help her. Gently, as gently as he could, he placed his hand on her cheek, barely grazing it with his thumb. "You'll feel better soon. Really, it wonât be long now. For now... just donât overexert yourself, please, breathe."
At first, she flinched. He wanted to withdraw his hand as quickly as possible, but then he felt her press her face against it, almost nuzzling into it. A shy tear danced in one of her eyes, barely noticeable.
"Itâs good to see you," she said after a brief silence, a soft sigh escaping her lipsâalmost like a laugh, though it didnât quite make it. Her breath was still shallow and uneven, but with each passing moment, it seemed to steady as he held her close.
And in that moment, seeing her like that, feeling her presence so close, a smile spread across his faceâa smile so genuine, so long-awaitedâand with it came the tears heâd been holding back for what felt like forever.
"I feel the same," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "You have no idea how much."
*
The orthopedic collar pissed you off like nothing else.
It wasnât even the discomfort that bothered you, it was just... the collar was such a painful reminder of your condition, a testament to what you had been through. And you were supposed to wear it for another six to eight weeks.
Two weeks after waking from the coma, preparations for leaving the hospital were beginning. The risk of brain swelling had subsided, the injuries were healing, and the concussion still made its presence known, but the pain was no longer as intense. You could even have a normal conversation, which you seized almost immediately, striking up a chat with the teenage girl in the bed next to you, her sad expression tugging at your heart.
Few people visited you; you preferred that the two most important ones could spend as much time with you as possible, rather than inviting coworkers or acquaintances you hadnât spoken to in months. The two most important people.
Spencer had been with you since the moment you woke up, and as the doctor confessed to you with a small smile, he had also stayed by your side while you were in a coma. You were in shock. Not because he had done itâit made perfect sense, given his caring nature. The shock came from the simple fact that one person could care so deeply about another, about you.
It didnât take long for you to realize that the moments when he visited you became your favorite part of the entire day. And not just because they revolved around checking your condition, tests, and the first, incredibly light rehabilitation exercises. You simply found yourself waiting for the moment he would appear in that doorway again, holding his coat in hand, smiling.
"Hello, handsome stranger," you greeted him one day, the first day you were starting to feel better.
 Spencer stopped at the sound of that term, tilting his head with an even wider smile.
 "How else did I used to call you?" you mused aloud. "Ah, I used to call you Mr. Mysterious. But I suppose that's no longer fitting, you smile too much to seem mysterious."
 "Because I have a reason," he replied, stopping beside your bed and glancing at the flowers placed there, the ones that had greeted you when you woke up that day. "But in that case, 'Handsome stranger' doesnât fit either, since you know me now."
"But you are handsome. Half of it fits, so I have the right to call you that. Who... who sent me these flowers?"
"Better question would be, who didnât send you those?" he muttered, referring to their large number. You could only admire themâthe beautiful, colorful arrangementsâbut you hadnât had the chance to read the notes and messages attached. Spencer glanced at one of them, his smile fading, though not in a bad way... somehow, the expression that appeared on his face was even more pleasing than his smile. "This... this oneâs from my team."
You were simply speechless.
 "They... they even know I exist?"
 "Of course they do, how could they not?" Spencer paused for a moment, looking at you thoughtfully. "They... they were with me the whole time you were in a coma. They helped me keep my head together."
 "Donât exaggerate," you tried to dispel the sudden serious mood. You didnât want to delude yourself into thinking he had been that worried about you during that time.Â
 "Itâs not an exaggeration," he replied briefly and seriously, his face almost motionless.
For a moment, you fell silent, your hands resting on the blanket in front of you.
 "Sorry, Spencer. I just realized Iâve never thanked you for this..."
"What?" he asked, surprised, his brows furrowing. "This isnât something you have to thank me for..."
"But I feel like I have to. This... this isnât some small, silly favor. You really did so much for me... I still donât fully understand why..."
 "You donât understand why?"
"Yeah," you sighed uncertainly, not sure how to put it into words. "Donât get me wrong... Iâm so grateful to you, itâs just... look at it this way. We didnât know each other that long, we saw each other rarely. We slept together once. Itâs not like you wereâŠobligated to help me."
"I didnât have to be obligated to do it," he said after a moment of hesitation, circling your bed and sitting on the edge, just barely touching it. "And I didnât have to know you for years. I just wanted to do it because of how much I cared about you. And if that explanation doesnât convince you... then..." He swallowed hard. "Remember, you were there for me during one of the worst moments of my life."
âItâs not the same...â
 âOh, but it is. For me, it is. But I donât want you to think that I was there for you because I felt like I owed you something. Or that I had to... I donât know... repay you in some way. Thatâs not it at all.â
You didnât answer, something tight gripped your throat. You just tilted your head, overwhelmed with emotion, speechless. The only thing you truly wanted to do was stretch out your arms and drape them around his neck, resting your chin on his shoulder. Spencer sighed, surprised and tense. It wasnât until a brief moment passed that his hands gently touched your back.
âHow much longer are you going to act like Iâm made of glass?â you asked.
You knew his caution was justified, but Jesus. You just really wanted to hug him properly.
âProbably forever,â he replied, to which you rolled your eyes.
He was the one to break the hug, but in compensation, he quickly kissed the top of your head. You leaned back against the bed, feeling a pleasant sensation in your stomach. Spencer returned to the flowers to tell you who had sent them all.
âSo these are from my team,â he picked up the lost thread, pointing to the arrangement of white and pink carnations. He chuckled. âAnd Iâm pretty sure Penelope picked them out, not just because her name is listed first. White represents perseverance and strength. Pink stands for admiration and respect.â
âThatâs really thoughtful. And beautiful. Iâll have to thank them. And these tulips?â
Spencer took the note attached to the mentioned flowers between his fingers.
âFrom... Jerry.â
âWhat? My husband sent me flowers?â
 âWhat?â He jerked his head up in surprise.
You laughed so hard at the look on his face that it made you wince in your ribs.
 âIâm fucking kidding, you fool,â you replied, clutching your side with a groan. âJerry is the librarian. You should know him. He once asked me what flowers he should buy for his wife, and I suggested yellow tulips. By the way, it's so nice of himâ.
You said it affectionately, but it sounded incredibly weak. Along with the pain in your ribs, a headache joined in, and suddenly all the energy you'd had earlier evaporated.
âWhat's happening? Should I call a doctor?â
âNo,â you shook your head in refusal. âI just need to lie down for a moment. Come here.â
Spencer followed your request and sat beside your bed, his body a little stiff, as if in guilt.
"I'm sorry I made you laugh."
"That's probably the strangest thing you could apologize for," you muttered, lying down in the position that was best for your neck, one you almost hated as much as the orthopedic collar. "Well, I guess I could come up with something stranger. Sorry I left that million dollars in your nightstand. It won't happen again."
"I'm not sure if this kind of chatter is particularly good for your condition."
"It helps me mentally, and that's what matters most. Besides, stop complaining."
"How could I possibly dare?"
He fell silent, simply watching you with quiet concern. You closed your eyes for a moment, unsure if you might accidentally drift off. After spending a week in a coma, your sleep routine had become completely erratic. You slept through the nights, mostly because there was little else to do, and you didnât want to disturb the other patients in the ward. During the day, Spencer would visit, and you wanted to be as rested as possible when he was around.
When he wasnât there, you sometimes napped during the day as well. According to the doctors, it was one of the best things you could do for your recoveryâsleep and rest as much as your body needed.
"Is something bothering you?" he asked.
You hesitated for a long moment, because yes, something was weighing heavily on your mind. Had he guessed, or had he read it on your face?
âItâs justâŠâ you began with a sigh. âYou know Jude barely visits me? I mean, she shows up every day, but⊠sheâs so tense and distant when sheâs here. She doesnât say much, and she wonât look me in the eyes.â
"Sheâs blaming herself," Spencer said softly.
âGod, thatâs so stupid,â you muttered.
You had a strange relationship with the accident. You thought about it as little as possible, keeping it at armâs length. You knew Richard had been arrested, but you didnât want to know the details of his sentencing. In no way did you see any of it as Judeâs fault, and it hurt you deeply to think that she did.
You spent a quiet moment together before Spencer leaned over you again, intending to kiss your forehead.
âIâm sorry, but Iâll have to go now,â he said, to which you nodded in understanding.
But then you shifted your head, pulling back just enough to stop him from brushing his lips against your forehead. He looked at you, puzzled, since youâd never minded it before.
This time, though, you wanted him to kiss you on the lips.
He kissed you slowly. You had almost forgotten how he tasted.
After that, you didnât bother opening your eyes again. You let yourself imagine that he wasnât leaving at all, and with that comforting thought, you drifted off to sleep.
*
Spencer had felt strange since the morning.
 Energized and excited. In the absolute best possible way.
That day, he could finally take her home. Well, to his apartment. She needed someone to take care of her, and he felt honored to be that person.
The day before, he had made a very important, yet difficult decision. He invited JJ over and confessed everything to herâabout the past few weeks and his struggles with relapsing into addiction. He needed to rid himself of that burden. Besides, he had promised himself that as long as she was living with him, not even the smallest dose of Dilaudid would find its way inside. Never again.
In his worst moments, he imagined that his friend would react with disgustâpure, painful disgustâand push him away. Instead, her eyes filled with something strange the moment he began to speak about how he had felt after Emily's death. Over and over, she whispered apologies, as though she were the one responsible for it.
He still missed Emily, of course, and he knew he would always miss her. That was just the way of thingsâpeople left, and it was up to you to decide whether you would remember them with heartbreaking despair or with a wistful sigh. In fact, these were merely two ends of the same spectrum, and it was very easy to get stuck at the beginning, unable to move forward.
She was surprisingly quiet in the car and seemed depressed. Actually, it was hard not to blame her. She had spent a long time in the hospital, gotten used to that routine, and the change made her feel lost. Sitting in the passenger seat, she kept her gaze fixed ahead, but not on the road. She couldnât see where they were headed, which made it difficult for Spencer to tell her something⊠at least important.
 When they stopped, she furrowed her brow in surprise.
 âWhy are we here?â
They were parked under his apartment, and she had been under the impression they were heading to her place.
 âSorry, I shouldâve told you earlier, I really apologize,â Spencer blurted out in one breath, chaotically. âI absolutely realize that this is like putting you in a situation you didnât expect, but⊠but when you were in the hospital, Jude found herself a new roommate. She didnât really know how to tell you, but she had to do it because she couldnât afford the rent on her own.â
For a long moment, she stared at him in silence, her face a mixture of shock, followed by understanding. She took a deep breath.
 âOkay,â she muttered. âI understand her, I just⊠I donât understand why she didnât tell me this herself.â
Their relationship still remained deeply complicated, put to the test by guilt. Spencer couldnât say much about it. It was something between the two of them, and he hardly knew Jude at all.
 âIâm also sorry for asking you this so late,â he continued after a moment. âBut⊠you canât live alone, you know that. Someone⊠someone needs to be with you over the next few weeks and⊠Iâm willing to be that person.â
Her lips remained slightly parted for a moment.
âYou want⊠no, wait, you want me to move in with you?â It was clearly a rhetorical question, because before he could answer, she started shaking her head. âSpencer, I canât. I canât be that burden for you.â
âA burden? Youâre notâŠâ
âBut I will be. In the next few weeks, I definitely will be.â
He took his hands off the steering wheel, placing them loosely on his knees.
âCan you⊠can you look at me for a moment?â he asked.
It took a moment before she hesitantly met his gaze. Her eyes were filled with embarrassed tears, tears full of unjust shame. Seeing this, pain spread through his chest.
âIf the accident hadnât happened, would you want to live with me?â
 Her lips remained pressed together, and she sighed.
 âItâs a big decision. Aside from the fact that if it werenât for the accident, I wouldnât even have to consider this optionâŠâ
âI just want to know if you would want to. Donât think of it as an option, just as⊠a completely normal, life decision. Do you think youâd be able to handle having me around every day?â
She couldnât help it, and her lips curled into a slight smile.
âWe could try,â she finally replied.
Spencer straightened his arms.
âIn that case, letâs go inside.â
 âNo, wait, itâs not that simple! My opinion shouldnât matter; itâs you who needs to think about whether you want thisâŠâ
 âI do.â
She snorted, resigned, not knowing what else to say.
âI canât even tie my own shoes,â she tried one last time.
âIâll gladly do it for you. Whatâs more, I know all kinds of knots. Simple, sailorâs, ChineseâŠâ
âSpencer Reid, youâre impossible.â
For the rest of the day, she tried every possible way to talk him out of his decision. But when she finally accepted it, she struggled to accept his help with tasks she couldnât do on her own.
 It wasnât until later that he realized how much she had been pretending in the hospital. He had only seen her for a fraction of her day, and she seemed so positive then. But this temporary disability had really taken a toll on her mentally. He could repeat and assure her, completely sincerely, that she wasnât a burden to him, but deep down, she still believed otherwise.
So, when two days later, she timidly appeared in the bedroom doorway with the question of whether he could help her wash her hair, Spencer felt like he had won the lottery.
âSure,â he agreed, probably a bit too enthusiastically, jumping to his feet so quickly that he almost tripped.
She pretended not to notice.
In the bathroom, he slowly helped her pull the shirt over her head, careful not to catch it on the collar still around her neck or accidentally cause her any pain.Â
âBe careful not to tilt your head too much, okay?â he asked, wetting her hair with the showerhead. She closed her eyes when a few drops of water splashed onto them. âSorry!â
âFor god's sake, Spencer, you're doing it more carefully than I would have done myself.â
It was true; he was acting as if he were performing some task at work that required absolute precision. He shrugged, massaging the strawberry shampoo into her hair. Foam quickly appeared, smelling sweet.
Suddenly, her hands tightened around the front of his shirt.
âSorry,â she whispered, loosening her grip. âI got a little dizzy.â
Spencer immediately pressed his hands, still covered in shampoo, to her waist, afraid she might fall. He stared at her face for a long moment, waiting for the dizziness to pass.
And just then, her body suddenly went limp, falling forward.
Terrified, he let out a strangled cry.
âHold on, please, donât fall!â he kept repeating, doing everything he could to keep her upright.
Her hands hung limply on his shoulders, the foam and water soaking into his shirt, but he didnât care at all.
âIâm right here, hold on to me as much as you can. C-c-can you hear me at all?â
He wondered whether it would be better to stand her up or lay her down while he could get to the phone and call an ambulance, when suddenly her weak touch grew stronger, and she let out a soft groan.
âSorry.â
âDonât you dare apologizing. Iâm still holding you, can you hear me?â
His heart was pounding incredibly fast as she gently pulled her head away from his chest. He, of course, didnât let her stand on her own, constantly supporting her body, protecting her from a fall that could be disastrous.
Together, they left the shower cabin, her hair still covered in foam.
âAre you aware that this is how itâs going to look now?â she asked seriously.
Completely unfazed, he wiped the foam from her forehead, which was dangerously close to her eyes.
âIâd rather have you lose consciousness in my bathroom, right next to me, than risk⊠I donât know, cracking your head open.â
For a moment, she was silent, the color beginning to return to her pale face, her gaze becoming more alert. He had a strange feeling that she was about to start crying, and since he really didnât want that, he pulled her close again, in his usual protective gesture. Everything around them smelled of strawberries.
âDo you really have to be this good?â
Spencer snorted.
âIâm afraid itâs just my curse.â
*
âAre these people really arguing about whether a cucumber is a fruit or a vegetable?â
Sitting on the couch, you jumped when a voice spoke right behind you. At the last second, you caught your laptop before it slipped off your lap. You had been reading some absurd discussion on an online forum you stumbled upon completely by accident. And yes, these users were indeed arguing about whether a cucumber is a fruit or a vegetable.
âDamn it, Spencer!â you shouted, putting your hand over your heart, which was pounding in an agitated rhythm. You looked at your boyfriend with a scowl. âYou almost gave me a heart attack. How is it possible I didnât hear you come in?â
He shrugged. Leaning his elbows on the back of the couch, the rolled-up sleeves of his shirt revealed the skin of his forearms. In that position, he had a perfect view of the screen on your laptop. He had just returned from work, a rainy July evening, his hair slightly damp.
âI wasnât sneaking around. You mustâve just been lost in thought. Want to tell me whatâs occupying that beautiful mind of yours?â He leaned in to place a kiss on your temple.
âBeautiful mind, huh?â you repeated, raising an eyebrow. âJust a few days ago, you told me that if a 19th-century priest heard even one thought from my head, heâd go into anaphylactic shock. Whatever that was supposed to mean.â
"In a big simplification, what I meant is that even though I love you, sometimes your way of thinking scares me."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"By the way, I bought land for Alexander."
Alexander was your new flycatcher, which had grown so much that it completely prevented the other flowers on the windowsill from growing. Due to its conqueror tendencies, you decided to name it after one of them.
"Do you want to repot it into a new pot now...?"
"No. Now you need to come to me."
You set the laptop aside and waited for him to take a seat on the couch. Before fully snuggling into him, you untied and removed the tie from his neck, then unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt, just the way you liked.
You sighed almost instantly; his body was more comfortable than a pillow. Warm, with your favorite scent. You rested your head on his chest as his fingers gently combed through your hair.
In the first few weeks after you were discharged from the hospital, you couldnât even sleep in the same bed. There was a risk that, in his sleep, he might accidentally bump into your neck and cause damage. Spencer enforced that rule strictly, as he did with every precaution related to your health.
Six months had passed since the accident, and for the past four months, you hadnât worn a neck brace or needed help with daily tasks. But that didnât change the fact that, sometimes, when you showered together, he would wash your hair just like he used to. Anyway, you were still attending rehabilitation and would need to for a long time, but despite that, you felt like you had fully returned to normal life.
You lifted yourself slightly to look at his face.
"I was walking to the bar today," you began.
Youâd been considering going back to work for a while now, and the doctors had assured you there was no reason you couldnât. You wanted something to occupy your hands and craved the sense of purpose that came with a task. Youâd mentioned it to Spencer long ago, so he didnât seem surprised when you brought it up.
"And? Will they take you back?"
"No. I mean, itâs not that they donât want to, I just didnât get there. Thatâs why I said I was walking and not that I went to a bar. Are you following?"
"I'm trying."
"So, listen to this. I took the subway and got off at that station near the room I used to rent."
The landlord had asked for the keys back shortly after your accident. Your arrangement had been that, in exchange for using the space, you cleaned it daily. Of course, you hadnât been able to keep up with that anymore.
"...And I don't know, I was overwhelmed by this strange feeling, like I wanted to go back to it. Helping people."
"You help people all the time," Spencer reminded you. "All our neighbors come to you to vent about everything happening in their lives."
"That's true, but I mean, you know, professional help," you said, taking a deeper breath. You couldn't decide whether you were more excited or nervous about the decision. "I've been thinking about going back to uni, Spencer."
He straightened up, almost causing you to slide off his chest. Filled with tension, you watched his reaction closely. Youâd spent the entire day wondering what he might say. Would he share your enthusiasm and support your plans, or would he try to talk you out of it, reasoning that youâd dropped out of school once and might not manage it again?
These thoughts were incredibly silly. Spencerâknowledge-obsessed, ever-curious Spencerâwould never say something like that.
Instead, he pulled you into a tight embrace, whispering how incredible the idea was. You melted into it completely, feeling more elated than ever and unable to stop thinking about the crazy chain of cause and effect that had led to this specific moment, this particular relationship, and above all, this exact happiness.Â
do you accept this overly sweet ending as my apology? :> tagging: @nightfullofparadox @lillaberry @fortheloveofgubler @opheliahotchner @cowboy1ikereid @penelopegarciaismygf
sorry if i forgot about someone!
#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid#spencer reid criminal minds#spencer reid x oc#criminal mind#derek morgan#criminal minds fic#criminal minds fanfiction#dr spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#dr reid
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Which monsters are cool with monogamy? There's some speculation on who's good with sharing their human mate with who. But who's doubling down on smugness and protectiveness if the human says they only want one mate?
Most are content with Monogamy, some will only be able to consider the Human if their associated 'group' is allowed by that group's defacto leader (Lilia, Sebek, and Silver fall under a group and are bound by their loyalty to Malleus to let Malleus be the primary mate, they will not agree to be primary mates to the Human without Malleus involved).
Malleus will 100% double down if the Human wants monogamy. He figured he was the only one good enough for them to be a life-long mate with, may as well full send it. He is somewhat sad Lilia was not also chosen as Lilia desperately wants the Human, but he will agree to monogamy for the Human.
Leona will absolutely keep the monogamy vibes for his little Mousey. How cute the Mousey wants him all to themselves. He thinks it is precious and will give that Mousey what they want. He has been second place for a lot of his life, it works wonders for is already large ego to be in first place for once.
Ace already knew he was going to win, I mean, he was your first first-year friend, after all. He loves that he gets to have you all to himself. No sharing with that block-head Deuce.
Deuce is honored you have selected him as your one and only mate, he will happily do the same for you. Don't worry, he is ready to fight off anyone who disagrees (he will lose terribly in most cases, but he will still try and that's what matters!)
Riddle is already on the primarily monogamous route and has zero issue being the Human's one and only. He will be proud as hell about it and boast that his 'King of Hearts' only wants him.
Jack likes the idea of monogamy because he is naturally territorial and likes knowing his territory (the Human) is just as territorial of him as he is of them. Happy pupper wants his mate to be happy.
Azul will happily be the Human's one and only anday even feel the need to tease Jade and Floyd about the Human choosing only him. He will lord it over others and will boast he is the only one they chose.
Papa Hades is already fairly monogamous so if the Human goes the romantic route and not platonic route with him, he will maintain his monogamous ways.
Jade is thrilled with the idea of not having to share with Azul or his Twin, the Human being his one and only, the one only he gets to embrace and hold, he loves it. Craves it.
Floyd is so happy you saw reason, Shrimpy! After all, he only shares with his brother because he has to most times. Don't worry! He can protect and squeeze you well enough all on his own. After all, this is just another reason to challenge himself at something, and the Human is a very fun prize!
Ruggie has been bullied out of almost everything in life other than his home. He is huge by Human standards, but a runt by Gnoll standards, how lovely it would be to be the one and only for the most precious prize ever?
Rook is not sure he deserves this. He is by no means as extraordinary as Vil or as beautiful as Neige, why would the Human choose him? They have so many options, he is fine sharing, honestly! He is unsure he can accept being their one and only. Of course, he also selfishly craves being the only one who gets to know that Human intimately and it gives a wicked sense of unbridled pride from the idea.
Vil is alright with monogamy, to be first place and not have to share it with anyone is truly magnificent. He won't stop Rook from trying unless the Human asks for his help in the matter, but he won't encourage Rook either if the Human truly wants him to be as monogamous.
Idia is just tickled pink about it all. No one to bully him out of his mate? No one to try and put him down for being less confrontational and extroverted? Heaven. He LOVES THIS. Him, Idia, the one no one gave the time of day to, the one no one expected to pull the rarest SSR card with max charisma stats. He who has negative luck and negative charisma stats. Unsuspecting Idia won the Human all to himself and he couldn't be happier about it.
Trey is honestly pleased and thinks it is for the best, he can get more than a little possesive about this precious Human. He would love being the only one that gets the Human to love and hold. He promises to look at no other and expects the same in return. Though he could share, he doesn't want to.
Cater is not sure if he deserves the Human after everything he has done. He isn't sure he should even be allowed around the Human after his actions. If you are certain he is the one you want, he won't argue.
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FELIX X READER ;àŒàčàŁ fluff ; comfort
request from @jeonginsleftcheek (love your works btw tysm for the request ⥠)
a/n: HI GUYS IVE GOT MY TICKETS FOR THE DOMINATE TOUR IM SO EXCITED!!
It had been one of those daysâthe kind where the weight of everything felt unbearable, like the world had conspired against you. From the moment you woke up, nothing had gone right. Work was overwhelming, people were impatient, and even the smallest things seemed to fall apart in your hands. By the time you finally walked through the door to your apartment, the tears you had fought so hard to keep at bay spilled freely, slipping down your cheeks in silent streams.
You leaned heavily against the door, closing your eyes as the exhaustion overtook you. The quiet of your home was supposed to feel like relief, but tonight it only felt heavy, empty.
âY/N?â
Your heart nearly jumped out of your chest at the sound of Felixâs familiar voice. You hadnât even noticed him sitting on your couch, his long legs tucked under a throw blanket, a cup of tea on the coffee table in front of him. His soft brown eyes widened when he saw your face, his expression shifting from surprise to deep concern in an instant. He stood quickly, taking a tentative step toward you.
âWhat happened? Are you okay?â His voice was gentle but full of worry, the kind of tone that made you want to crumble entirely.
You quickly wiped at your tears, trying to pull yourself together. âLix⊠Hey. I didnât know you were here.â You tried to force a smile, but it wavered. âItâs nothing, really. I just⊠had a bad day.â
Felixâs brows knit together as he studied your face. âNothing doesnât make you cry like this.â He took another step closer, careful not to overwhelm you. âCome here,â he murmured softly, opening his arms.
You hesitated for only a second before collapsing into his embrace. Felix wrapped you up tightly, his arms firm and protective as he pulled you against his chest. His sweater smelled faintly of vanilla and something warm and earthy, and the familiarity of it made your tears flow harder. You buried your face in his shoulder, your sobs muffled against the soft fabric as he held you.
âItâs okay,â he whispered, his voice a soothing balm against the storm raging in your heart. âIâm here. Let it out.â
And you did. You cried until your shoulders stopped shaking, until the ache in your chest started to feel a little less overwhelming. Felix didnât let go, not once, his hands rubbing slow, calming circles on your back as he murmured quiet reassurances.
Eventually, when the tears had slowed to a stop, he pulled back just enough to look at you. His thumb brushed lightly over your cheek, wiping away the last traces of wetness. âCome sit down with me,â he said gently, guiding you to the couch.
He settled you beside him, tucking the blanket over your lap before draping his arm around your shoulders, keeping you close. You leaned into him, letting your head rest against his chest as his fingers absently played with the ends of your hair.
âDo you want to talk about it?â he asked softly after a moment.
You sighed, unsure where to even begin. âIt was just⊠everything. Work was stressful, and people were rude, and I just felt⊠I donât know. Like nothing I did today was good enough.â
Felixâs arm tightened around you slightly, a protective gesture. âY/N⊠I hate that you had to deal with all that today. None of itâs fair. Youâre so amazingâwhether itâs at work or just⊠being you. And if other people canât see that, thatâs on them, not you.â
His words hit you harder than you expected, a fresh wave of emotion rising in your chest. You closed your eyes, letting the warmth of his presence soothe you.
âThank you, Lix,â you whispered, your voice barely audible.
âAlways,â he replied without hesitation, his tone so sincere it made your heart ache. âIâll always be here for you.â
The room fell into a comfortable silence after that, the only sounds the soft hum of Felixâs breathing and the faint ticking of the clock on the wall. His hand moved to gently rub your arm, his touch feather-light but grounding. You felt yourself starting to relax for the first time all day, the tension slowly melting from your body as you sat wrapped in his warmth.
âYou know,â Felix said suddenly, his voice breaking the quiet, âIâve been meaning to tell you something.â
You tilted your head slightly to look up at him. âWhat is it?â
He hesitated for a moment, his gaze flickering away from yours as if he were gathering his courage. When he looked back, his expression was soft, but there was a seriousness in his eyes that made your breath catch.
âY/N⊠I donât think I can keep this to myself anymore.â His voice was quieter now, almost nervous. âI care about you. A lot. More than just⊠as a friend.â
Your heart stopped, the words hanging in the air between you. For a moment, you werenât sure if you had heard him correctly. âWhat?â you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper.
Felix gave you a small, almost shy smile, his cheeks tinged pink. âI love you, Y/N. Iâve loved you for a while now, but I didnât want to risk ruining what we have. But seeing you like this tonight⊠I realized I canât keep it in anymore. You mean so much to me, and I just⊠I wanted you to know.â
You stared at him, your mind racing to process his words. And then, slowly, warmth bloomed in your chest, chasing away the heaviness that had lingered there all day. âFelix⊠Iââ You paused, your lips curving into a soft smile. âI love you too.â
His eyes widened in surprise, his mouth opening slightly as if he hadnât dared to hope you would say those words back. And then, his face broke into the most beautiful smile you had ever seen, his expression radiant with relief and happiness.
âReally?â he asked, his voice tinged with disbelief.
âReally,â you confirmed, reaching up to gently cup his face. âHow could I not? Youâre⊠everything to me.â
Felix let out a breathy laugh, his hand coming up to cover yours where it rested on his cheek. âYou have no idea how happy you just made me.â
He leaned down, resting his forehead against yours, and for a moment, the world felt stillâjust the two of you, wrapped in each otherâs warmth. His thumb brushed over your cheek again, his touch as tender as ever.
âIâll take care of you, Y/N,â he murmured. âOn your bad days, your good days, and everything in between. I promise.â
You closed your eyes, letting his words sink into your heart. For the first time that day, you felt truly at peace, safe in the arms of someone who loved you completely.
tags: @hannamoon143 @intartaruginha
#felix x you#felix fluff#lee felix#felix x y/n#felix angst#felix x reader#skz felix#felix#stray kids felix#skz#skz x reader#stray kids#stray kids fluff#stray kids x reader#stray kids x y/n#skz imagines
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this was born out of a text exchange between me and cappy where i rewatched the "coming home" youtube video and quinn had the audacity to bend over the edge of the table like a SLUT. my message about that moment was "I HATE him for putting his leg up on the edge like this (and you know what? Bea would fuck him on the pool table fs)". Cappy replied: "also - circling back to the fucking on the pool table. yes i do think that should be included in beaâs book. love that both girls fuck their men on the pool table". then I discussed how Bea is going to ask how it was for Honey because position-wise, she wasn't super comfy "And then honeyâs going to be like âbruhâ and then bea will be like âaw thatâs so cute of us, we fucked our guys in the same place đ weâre basically semen sistersâ and honey is going to be so affronted". So that's what inspired this. I started having visions when I was supposed to work on my grad school essay, so I needed to write it down to get it out of my mind.
HERE! is the beaquinn pool table sex. if you want to know what's happening with honeytrev at the same time as this, you can reread days 30-33 in Chapter 5 of stg. LOVE YOU! say it back. ENJOY!
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Bea almost doesnât want to leave Quinnâs bed when she hears the front door creak open, signaling the brothersâs return from Las Vegas. Itâs warm in here and the pillow smells like Quinn. Her t-shirt will have to do. Itâs Quinnâs old yellow Michigan t-shirt, which falls big on her but not big enough to cover her behind. The hardwood floor is cold as she makes her way out of bed and throws the sheets back into place, tiptoeing down the hall and the stairs without making the floor creak too much. Bea undoes the messy braid on the back of her head, knowing how Quinn likes it when her hair is loose for him to play with. She shakes out her hair as she creeps down the stairs, the whispers of the brothers getting louder with each step.
âJack, the doorââ Luke hisses just before the front door bangs shut.
Bea stifles a giggle by pressing her fingers over her lips, still hiding in the shadows of the staircase.Â
The boys stand in almost identical poses, shoulders tense and heads ducked. Theyâre waiting for one of their housemates to wake up and get mad at them for making so much noise. Theyâre luckyâ Coleâs been dead to the world since about 10:30 and Trevor went to bed around 11 after he talked with Honey. Bea doesnât know exactly what happened, since Honey is still so unsure about this Trevor thing, with good reason, but she knows that Honey had to remind him to think before he speaks. Bea is so glad she doesnât have that problemâ Quinn loves to think before he speaks. The other boys are less thoughtful, but sheâs never had to chew them out for saying something stupid.
âClose one, eh?â Jack whispers, although heâs bad at whispering, so his voice just seems softer than normal.
Bea steps out of the shadows, staying close to the wall like itâll camouflage her bright yellow shirt.Â
âBea,â Quinn breathes out, noticing her immediately. He sets his suitcase down next to him, a smile growing on his face when he recognizes her outfit.
âYouâre late,â Bea whispers, matching his grin. âYou said 1:30.â
âSorry,â Quinn says, but he doesnât seem all that sorry.
âThere was a crash on 77,â Luke adds. âPretty bad. Probably better that it happened in the middle of the night, since there werenât as many cars on the road.â
Bea hums. âThatâs sad.â
âHave you been up this whole time?â Jack asks. âItâs late.â
Bea shakes her head. âSlept a little bit.â
âOh, yeah?â Jack grins. âWhose bed?â
Stupid. Bea snorts, taking a few more steps until sheâs in front of him. She lifts her hand and squishes his cheeks between her fingers. âNot yours,â she says. âGânight, Jacky.â
He makes a kissing noise at her, then steps back and bumps into the table in the hall. âOops,â he mumbles. âNight, Bea.â
Luke echoes a goodnight and pats Bea on the back, holding both his and Quinnâs suitcases in his hands. The brothers squeeze past her, leaving Quinn and Bea in the dark alone.
She grins at him, bouncing a little bit on her tiptoes out of excitement. Sheâs missed him. Quinn smiles back, his eyes glinting in the darkness. Heâs the first to step forward, sweeping her up into his arms in a tight hug. He buries his face in her neck, letting his arms push her shirt up so that he can touch the smooth expanse of her back. Bea wraps her arms over his shoulders and plays with his hair, breathing him in. He smells a little bit like airport, but the scent of his sandalwood shampoo is stronger than ever.Â
âYou shower this morning?â Bea asks, pinching the close-cut strands on the back of his head between her fingers.Â
âGod, I knew you were going to comment on that,â Quinn groans, pulling away from her. His hands rest on Beaâs waist, pinkies brushing the band of her cheeky underwear. âI was on a plane for like five hours, babe.â
Beaâs stomach twists at the pet name, her cheeks turning a little red and her mouth widening somehow further. She admires Quinn for a moment, eyes cataloging how his face looks sharper with his stubble only just growing back. Her eyes pass over the scar on his cheek. Honey only just noticed it the other night. Itâs one of Beaâs favorite things about his faceâ tied for first with, well, everything else.Â
She realizes that sheâs gone too long without replying, mostly because the edges of Quinnâs lips are tilting upward in an amused way.
âHey, winner,â Bea greets, tilting her head to kiss him hello. âMissed you.â
Quinn breathes out a tiny laugh, kissing her again like a reply. âI missed you, too. Was thinking about you the whole time.â
Bea faux-gasps. âYou were thinking about me, but you didnât even thank me in your speech?â
Quinn chuckles, a little louder this time. His thumb runs along her hip, petting the skin there. It makes Beaâs sides feel warm, like the friction is sending shocks through her body. âOh, come on. How would that have sounded?â
ââAnd thank you to Bea McLean, the best person Iâve ever metâ...?â Bea teases, blinking at Quinn. âObviously. Sounds pretty good to me.â
Quinn shakes his head, still smiling fondly. He rolls his eyes a little bit, but he concedes. âIâll work it in next time.â
âIâm expecting it. First back-to-back Norris winner since Nicklas Lindstrom, yeah?â
âLidstrom, baby,â Quinn corrects. He pulls Bea close again, hugging her for the second time. His hands rub up and down her back again and Bea swears that she can feel his fingerprints as he moves. âYou tired?â
âI slept a little. Are you tired?â
âHad a coffee at the airport âcause Iâm stupid,â Quinn replies. His voice turns sarcastic, overly dramatic and trying to get her sympathy. âAnd the boys were draining me, theyâre so annoying.â
Bea pats his chest. âYou love them,â she reminds him.
Quinnâs easy to break. âYeah,â he agrees. âTheyâre pretty great.â He pauses, eyes flickering over her face akin to how she surveyed him earlier. âWanna go watch a movie?â
âMovie will put me to sleep. We can play a round of pool, if you want. Keep your winning streak going,â Bea teases.Â
âYou just want to bend over in front of me,â Quinn bites back, laughing. His hands go to her behind, covering Beaâs cheeks with his palms. âDistract me with your panties.â
âIt would be more distracting if I wasnât wearing them,â Bea points out, wiggling back into Quinnâs touch.Â
âI think youâre already distracting enough in my Michigan shirt,â Quinn says. âCâmon. Letâs go downstairs. You can fill me in on the past couple days while you lose.â
Heâs got that playful tone in his voice again, the one that Bea loves. Itâs so domestic, the way that she and Quinn talk to each other. Theyâve got a vibe about them, something that fits like a puzzle piece, but Bea is getting too far ahead of herself. Itâs not even July. Theyâre just having fun, by her own design. So what if he calls her âbabyâ and it makes her stomach flip-flop every time?
Theyâre still trying to be quiet as they head down to the basement, making sure to close the door behind them. Quinn racks the balls and Bea chooses her usual stickâ she only knows which one it is because itâs got a chip about â
of the way down the shaftâ and starts to tell him what he missed.Â
âHoney tried to ban Trevor from the store because heâs bad at being a person,â Bea starts. âI donât know the drama, but apparently he doesnât think.â
âHave they fucked yet?â Quinn asks, rounding the table and stationing himself to break the rack. Bea never breaks when they play. Sheâs not very good at hitting one ball, much less strategically breaking up a group of fifteen. âOr are they still stuck on him fingering her in the back room?â
âTheyâre still stuck. She likes him so much, though, she just wonât admit it,â Bea continues. She looks at the table. Quinn made one of the stripes in off of his breakâ 14 maybeâ so heâs trying to pick his second ball now.
âSheâll get there. Itâs kind of like a tree falling, isnât it,â Quinn says. He lines up the 11-ball with the pocket and knocks it in, then purposefully bumps off the wall in a meaningless shot so that Bea has a chance. âTakes a while, but once sheâs down, sheâs down.â
Hmm. âIâve never thought of it like that,â Bea tells him. âThatâs smart, Q. Youâre right.â She eyes the 5-ball, since itâs kind of in the way of all of the ones she wants to get to. Might as well move it. Bea crosses the table and shoots it off to the other side of the table. A problem for later.
âYou canât try to lose on purpose,â Quinn chides.
âIâm not trying to lose on purpose, I just wanted to get that one out of the way,â Bea argues back.Â
Quinn rolls his eyes and sighs. âYou shouldâve shot at the 7.â
Bea side eyes him. âDonât tell me what I shouldâve done. Mansplainer.â
Quinn shrugs. âJust trying to help.â He focuses on his next shot. âWhatâd you do after we left?â
âWorked. I dragged Honey here to watch the Awards, we played Unoâ I won, by the way, and Iâll school you next time we playââ Quinn interrupts her with a laugh, narrowly missing a pocket when the ball bounces off the corner edge. âI called you after you won, and then we broke out the hot tub earlier today.â
That catches Quinnâs interest. âOh, yeah?â He asks. âYou took a dip? Did Cole try anything stupid?â
Bea hears the insinuation immediately. âNo, Cole and I didnât hook up while you were gone,â she says with a tinge of fake exasperation in her voice. âI told you over the phone on Thursday, I only have sex with men who have won the James Norris trophy.â
Quinn laughs aloud, throwing his head back. âHow long is that going to last?â He teases. âJust so I can know when Iâm back to graciously sharing you with the other boys.â
Bea groans. When theyâre alone, Quinn always flaunts how he was the first and how heâs her favorite. He gets a kick out of acting like heâs special and Bea pretends to hate it. He is special, but he doesnât need to know that. âI can still go up to Jackâs bed now, you know.â
âYou wouldnât dare.â
Bea leans over to shoot at one of her solids. It bounces off a wall and changes directions. âThatâs all that happened this weekend, really. Tell me about Vegas. Lose any money?â
âTons,â Quinn confirms, but the cheeky grin on his face tells her that heâs stretching the truth. He starts to talk about how he and his brothers snuck Luke into the casino with a well-placed bribe to the doorman and autographs for his kids. The stories from the weekend pile up as Quinn and Bea mill around the table, taking shots and sinking them in Quinnâs case, missing them in Beaâs. He tells her about the people he saw, the things he did, the interviews he had, that he got an offer to be on the cover of NHL 25 but heâs going to hold out until they let him bring Jack and Luke with him, and that heâs happy he got to see his mom and dad. He officially tells Bea that theyâre coming for Fourth of July, although that surprise had already been spoiled by Trevor on Thursday.Â
Quinn winsâ of course. Bea wasnât going to win this game unless he intentionally threw it, like her first time playing him. Theyâre past the intentional throws now. Bea goes to update the boardâ honor code is highly valued in this houseâ and Quinn pockets the rest of the balls so that everything is nice and clean for tomorrow. Thereâs no sense in leaving them out. She can hear Quinn sneaking up behind her.
âYou look good in my shirt, sweetheart,â Quinn murmurs, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and kissing Beaâs shoulder. âI gotta get you in Michigan gear more often.â
âYou know, if they ever play Carolina again, youâll have to pry my UNC gear from my cold, dead body,â Bea says, reaching a hand around and threading her fingers through Quinnâs hair again.
âWouldnât be the first time I pried the clothes off this body,â Quinn says, self-satisfied smirk evident in his voice. He turns Bea in his grip so that sheâs facing him. He kisses her, more than a greeting peck this time. âYou tired yet?â
Once again, Bea can see right through his question. âNot a chance. Iâve been waiting for my winner to get home.â
âThatâs what I like to hear,â Quinn praises, voice low. He captures Beaâs lips again, moving against her in the comfortable way that theyâve adopted in the weeks since theyâve been seeing each other.Â
Bea lets Quinn lead this time, his hands guiding her closer. Heâs got a palm under her shirt, resting on the small of her back, and the other cradles her face gently, like something precious. Bea knows that itâs a casual thing, but she likes to lose herself in moments like this. Quinn is just so⊠all-consuming. Heâs like a really loud and unexpected clap of thunder, one that rumbles on for longer than you expect. His touch makes Bea jump, sometimes.
Her hands explore him a bit, like she doesnât get to touch him all the time. The difference is that Bea finds something new every time and she never tires of getting her hands on Quinn. She knows that he tends to be insecure when it comes to his build, which comes from years of being an awkward teen with a nose that seemed too big for his face and acne that riddled his forehead, but Bea canât imagine Quinn as anything other than perfect.
Heâd be slightly more perfect if he had a bedroom to himself.Â
âI feel bad kicking Luke out,â Bea whispers to Quinn when they break for air. âYou guys got in so late. Heâs probably asleep.â
âDonât worry about it,â Quinn replies. He brings his hands to the backs of Beaâs thighs and lifts her up, guiding her legs around his waist. âWe donât need a bed.â
Bea makes a face. âWe stay fuckinâ in the bed, Q.â Lord knows sheâs not against having sex in an odd placeâ the back of Griffinâs patrol car, for oneâ but she and Quinn havenât really branched out yet. âI didnât know you were so adventurous.â
âWhat can I say,â Quinn teases. âYou bring something out in me. Letâs try something new.â He nips at her bottom lip, then drags his tongue against the area he bit. âItâll be fun.â
Bea giggles. He gets so flirty and touchy, sometimes. âWhat are you thinking, Crazy?â She teases him right back with the nickname, bringing her index finger to the curve of his nose. It really is the perfect size and shapeâ so appealing.Â
Sheâs distracted by a memory, from the second time they hooked up. Quinn had told her that he didnât get to do everything he wanted the first time, and when she asked what he meant, heâd licked his first two fingers and slid the wet digits against the fabric of her underwear. Sheâd gotten much more wet when he made his way between her legs with his mouth, kissing and licking over her folds and entrance as the fabric molded to her anatomy. It was only then that heâd removed the panties and gotten his mouth on her properlyâ the vision often comes to her when sheâs trying to sleep at home, alone. His nose had been so nice then, bumping against her clit as heâd ravished her.
Beaâs stomach grows a little warmer at the reminder.Â
âI want you right here,â Quinn says, breaking her from the spell. He sits Bea down on the edge of the pool table, the cool wood of the edges pressing against her thighs while the felt of the table scrapes against the hem of her shirt. He stands between her legs and places a hand behind her head, kissing her and leaning forward so that sheâll lay back. Once Bea is laying down, flat underneath Quinn, he pushes her shirt up and takes it off.Â
The felt of the table feels weird under her bare skin, but itâs not bad. The bite of the ridge of the table is worse against her thighs, but Bea doesnât speak up about it because Quinnâs removing his shirt.
The moonlight from outside makes him seem paler than he is, but it creates a beautiful series of shadows across his body that emphasize his muscles. His arms seem like theyâre bulging more, his chest has more definition, and his jawlineâ oh, his jawline. Bea didnât realize just how much his long hair hid that from her.
âI like your haircut,â Bea says, not realizing how silly and belated it sounds when sheâs almost entirely naked on the pool table below him.Â
Quinn chuckles, smiling at her. One side of his lips lifts higher than the other, which is how she knows that heâs blushing, even when the moonlight hides it. âThanks, baby,â he says softly, leaning down again to find her lips. His cock, still trapped by his pants, fits perfectly against the place where she wants him most.Â
She grinds up against him, drawing a low moan from the back of Quinnâs throat. He placates her with kiss after kiss down her neck and between her tits, as far down as he can go while he keeps his pelvis in line with her own. Heâs fiddling with his zipper with one hand, kneading Beaâs right breast with his left hand. The skin of his fingertips is a little dry, but his thumb catches her nipple just right and Bea keens, her vision getting a little darker.
âMissed me that much, hm?â Quinn teases in his low voice. âTwo days Iâm gone, baby, and youâre this needy? What am I going to do with you when Iâm gone for a week, or two?â
Bea reaches to his hair and brings his lips to hers, to silence him. Sheâs beyond talking and beyond teasing. She wants him inside, like, yesterday.Â
âRelax, Iâm coming,â Quinn assures Bea, mumbling his words against her lips. He finally takes his hand from her breast to shove his pants and underwear down, stepping out of them so he can move better. He drags his tip through her folds, her wetness gathering along his skin. âDid you mean it?â He asks. âWhat you said on the phone?â
Bea pauses, wracking her brain. She said a lot of things on the phone to Quinn. She meant them all. Sheâs about to say yes, just so he can get on with it, but then she spots the way heâs biting his lower lip and his eyes have turned hungry. Theyâre trained on the place where heâs nudging his tip against her clit, slit bubbling out precum and dripping on the sensitive bundle of nerves.Â
âWhat part?â Bea asks, captivated by the look on Quinnâs face.Â
His eyes rise to hers and he looks positively intoxicated by whatever heâs thinking. Beaâs skin crawls a little, but not in a bad way. In an excited wayâ whatever Quinnâs referring to, he wants badly. Bea wants to see him give into that.
âThat youâd reward me for winning,â he prompts, eyes darting from her gaze to her lips, which have parted in recognition. âBy letting me fuck you bare.â His jaw clenches a bit once he says it, but Bea reads him. Heâs not sure what sheâll say and he seems cautious to show his deeper thoughts on that, but his caution is betraying him anyway. Bea knows Quinn. She speaks his language, reads his tics, and understands him. He wants this.
âNorris winners get to come inside me,â Bea says, repeating the exact words that she whispered into the speaker while he stroked himself in the Las Vegas hotel bathroom. It was his tipping point, and now she understands why. âSince you won, you get to feel all of me.â Her throat seems drier than before when she swallows. Beaâs never had that beforeâ sheâs thought about it, hence why she brought it up to Quinn in the first place. Itâs why she gets the shot every three months instead of relying on condomsâ in case, one day, there was a man that she wanted in the most intimate way. That day is today. âFuck me, Quinn.â
His mouth is insistent when it joins hers, tongue dragging over her own and filling the space between her lips. âBaby,â Quinn groans. âYouâre going to be the death of me.â
âPreferably not right now,â Bea jokes, lifting her hips to remind him of the task at hand.Â
Quinn laughs at the joke, smiling into his next kiss. âYouâre so perfect,â he says. âCanât believe I met you.â
Bea feels his words on her heart like a prick of a roseâs thorn. A little bit of herself seeps out, flooding her chest and making her eyebrows furrow with the sudden rush of emotion. âQuinn,â Bea says, feeling like sheâs whining a little bit.
âOkay, okay, I wonât say it anymore,â he says, returning his focus to the space between her legs. He wastes another few seconds, entranced by his tip going through her folds, before he lines himself up and starts to shift forward. He moans quietly at the feeling, just expelling the breath from his lungs.
Beaâs surprised by the feeling tooâ at least, she thinks Quinnâs feeling some sort of surprise. Heâs certainly relishing in the experience, trying to catalog how she feels around him with the way his eyes have drifted shut and his mouth has fallen open. She closes her eyes to do the sameâ and finds that itâs not that different, all in all. She just feels closer to him.
âPlease, move,â Bea whispers, resting her hand on Quinnâs bicep, giving it a squeeze to prompt him. Well, that, and she wanted to feel the muscle beneath it. The moonlight had her wondering if it was really that much more defined.Â
âGimme a sec,â Quinn grits out, taking a breath. âYou just feel soââ He exhales a sharp breath. âFuck, you feel good.â
Another thorn to the chestâ Bea has to breathe in deep to steel herself. This doesnât feel like just fucking anymore.
Sheâs able to put that aside when Quinn starts to drag himself out of her heat, then push back in. His hair is tickling her nose with the way that his head has fallen forward in pleasure, so Bea pushes it out of the way with her palm. Quinnâs forehead has started to bead with sweat, but only barely. His eyes catch hers.
His eye contact has always made the hair on her arms stand up, increasing her pleasure tenfold. Heâs so attentive to her needs, crowding into her space and touching her tits and sides in the way that makes her feel like a lighting rod gearing up for a strike.Â
Quinn breaks first. âBea,â he murmurs, dipping his head to mouth against her neck. He leaves a wet spot there, which dries in the cool, early morning air. His hand moves from her side to her thigh, spreading her legs further so that he can inch closer. He seems determined to be as close to her as he can, touching her in every way.Â
âI know,â Bea replies. âHarder, Quinn. Take it. Make me come. Need you to feel my pussy when it comes on your bare cock.â
His moan is choked but loud when she says that. Quinnâs hips start to move the way sheâs used toâ harder, faster, determined. Heâs louder like this, or maybe itâs the silence of the basement and the night that surrounds them playing tricks on Beaâs mind. Itâs justâ his breath is warmer and she feels like she can feel him moving in her bones. This is more.
Quinn brings his thumb to her mouth, which Bea takes greedily. She knows his movesâ he wants her to get him all wet so that he can touch her somewhere she needs. She swirls her tongue around the digit, leaving as much saliva as she can on his thumb before he pulls it from her mouth with a pop.Â
His hand drifts to her boobs again, finding one of her nipples and pinching it with his slick finger. He tugs a little, which prompts Beaâs spine to arch like her body is begging him to do it again. Quinn does, but he switches nipples, wiggling his hand between their bodies and taking hold of her. He kisses her again, distracting her from the mixture of pain and pleasure. All the while, heâs bucking into her desperately, displacing her on the pool table.Â
Her thigh starts to spasm under his hand, twitching because sheâs close. Bea wraps her arms around Quinnâs shoulders, a mirror image of the hug she gave him at the beginning of their night. Heâs not the only one who wants to be close.
âFuck, Quinn, keep going,â Bea pleads, shifting as best she can to remove the pressure of the edge of the pool table from her body. Itâs a dull ache, distracting her from Quinnâs cock and the way it moves in her cunt. His tip meets the cartilage of her cervix relentlessly, turning her vision spotty with the sensation. It feels so wet with him unprotected inside of her, leaking and mixing with her own slick.Â
He shifts so that heâs hovering just a few inches above her body, hands going from her thigh and her breast to both of her hips. He grips her skin, biting his lower lip to stifle his grunts. His eyes have grown focused, narrowing the way they do when he evaluates a shot on this very table or when he tries to dance between the boys on the hockey rink outside to score. He pulls her back into him, all while thrusting his hips forward, and Beaâs falling into an unfamiliar space where only Quinn has ever placed her.Â
âFuck,â Bea whines, reaching for Quinn and coming up with nothing, so she clutches at the pocket of the pool table instead. She holds the wood between her fingers, sure that sheâll either warp the table or break her fingers from the force of her grip. ââM coming, Q.â
âGood girl,â Quinn says through his teeth, his voice gravelly. âLet me feel it.â
Bea lets out a short cry, legs still shaking beneath Quinn. The bruising pain of the edge of the table is nothing now, not when thereâs a chill making its way from the depths of her stomach to the tight coil in her stomach.Â
âSo perfect,â Quinn says again, praising Bea as she starts to come undone on his cock.
âYou,â Bea corrects, breathless and reaching for Quinn again. She finds his forearm this time, circling her fingers around his wrist. She squeezes, trying to get her point across. He can say it all he wants, but sheâs going to make sure she says it back, because he is.Â
Her touch sends Quinn over the edge, which only intensifies the aftershocks of her own orgasm. Bea keens lowly in the back of her throat as Quinnâs jaw drops once again, eyes falling shut as his seed flows from his cock and paints her walls. The sensation surprises Bea, much like her original reaction to his raw form, and she constricts against him by accident. That spurs Quinn on, making him choke and plaster himself against her body as his cock releases the last of his cum.
His hips twitch inside of her after heâs done and Quinn has to clear his throat and shake his head to come back to himself. Bea pets his hair through it, focused on the feeling of his freshly cut ends between her fingers.Â
âYou should know that I really liked that,â Quinn says first.
Bea giggles, tugging his hair. âReally? I couldnât tell.â
Quinn bites the side of Beaâs neck to chastise her for teasing him. âYou think youâre so funny.â
âI think Iâm about to leak all over the pool table in your rented house if you donât get me to a bathroom soon,â Bea replies. âChop chop, babydoll.â
Quinn groans with the effort, but he lifts Bea from the pool table and awkwardly walks toward the basementâs bathroom, settling her on the already-lifted toilet seatâ perks of living with a bunch of fucking boys, Bea thinksâ and then he starts to wash his hands.
âTired yet?â Quinn asks for a third time, looking over at Bea and grinning as he continues to rub the suds all over his hands and wrists. âWanna watch a movie?â
Bea makes a face. âAre you trying to wash me off or something? Damn, Q, itâs been twenty seconds,â she replies instead, pretending to be offended and hurt. She doesnât actually want to start watching a movie at 3 a.m. and Quinn should feel similarly. She wants to go to bed with him.
Quinn looks down at her vagina, very obviously, and quirks an eyebrow. âI mean, I just came in you, so I feel like thatâs hard to wash away.â He rinses his hands and towels them off. âSo no movie?â
âOh my God, get out of the bathroom so I can pee,â Bea exclaims, starting to laugh a bit. âYouâre so weird. No movie.â
âEpisode of Love Island?â Quinn asks. âAny drama I missed between Leah and Rob?â
Bea points an accusing finger at him. âI knew you enjoyed my trashy shows,â she says. âAnd all this time youâve been grumbling about them.â
Quinn shrugs. âNo one will believe you,â he whispers conspiratorially.Â
Bea purses her lips at him. âWell, good, because thatâs my thing with Cole.â Quinn acts like heâs wounded, so Bea sticks her tongue out at him. âNot everything can be about you, Q.â
âIâll get over it,â Quinn says. âYou still like me best.â
Bea matches his previous whisper. âAnd no one will ever believe you.â
Quinn leaves the bathroom laughing. Bea hopes he goes upstairs to get one of the good blankets for them to share when they inevitably fall asleep on the couch after Quinn turns on a movie that Bea does not see the point in watching.
The background noise does help her sleep, though, and she thinks Quinn knows that.
sigh i love beaquinn they're so dreamy best couple ever can't believe they break up at the end of the summer OOPS SORRY SPOILERS (y'all already know that, i haven't been keeping that under wraps)
#puck-luck's fics#andy writes anythingđ#small town girl x tz#beaquinn!!#quinn hughes#quinn hughes smut#quinn hughes x oc#qh43#nhl#nhl fanfiction#nhl smut#nhl fic#hockey smut#hockey romance
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https://x.com/femmeflix/status/1852896350481825792?s=46&t=PsXAfTCJv59FchQIdn66aA
Iâve been obsessed with Jackie/your Jackie fics and thoughts lately.
This with Jackie in the wilderness though..? Maybe an AU where she never died and find excuses to keep you âwarm at nightâ in winter? Youâre in the farthest corner of the cabin when she starts grinding against you softly. The others are asleep but you still have to be quiet, silently sighing into the otherâs mouth as you get each other offâŠ
-đȘ©
thank you đȘ© anon!! i probably added way too much background lore, but i hope this is what you had in mind <3 nsfw below so: mdni!
i feel like, unlike shauna, jackie would not be so in denial about how touch starved she is. i think sheâs well aware that she needs somebodyâs comfort, yet ever since doomcoming, she and shauna have not spoken properly and she wonât even look in travisâ direction.
it wasnât just the betrayal itself, you think, without ever saying it out loud, it was the audacity of it. now, every time jackie glanced at shauna, all she could see was the life she used to have, the life she had taken away piece by piece: her boyfriend, her best friend, her sense of control. nobody is ever calling it by name in spite of the elephant (shaunaâs bump) in the room.
jackie hadnât acknowledged the pregnancy out loud, yet the unspoken tension hangs in the air whenever they are forced to share space, impacting all of you.
the more time passes, the colder everyone gets.
except for tai and van, the rest of the team has sort of neglected the need for physical touch and closeness. without anyone around that youâd be comfortable enough with to ask for a simple hug, you try to do the same as everyone else. only at night, with the others fast asleep, you ever dare to wrap your arms around yourself, picturing itâs someone else holding you.
you wonât let it show to the others, though, not wanting to be the first to break under the current circumstances.
turns out you donât have to wait too long for someone else to be in a similar position: jackie had been the one to lose it from the start. sure, youâd all been terrified, but out of all the girls, jackie had been the most stubborn when it came to her chores out here.
sheâd always been the one least likely to adapt to any of this: to the wilderness, to the cold, to the isolation that gnawed at all of you. she wasnât built for this life, and everyone knew it, including her. but jackie wasnât one to let people see her break easily: the same jackie who once thrived on attention now barely spoke, her haughty attitude replaced by something more brittle.
it had only been a matter of time before this facade cracked.
youâd seen her unraveling slowly. the way she avoided shauna, the way she avoided everyone, really. how she snapped at taissa for trying to delegate chores or rolled her eyes at natâs attempts to hunt. sheâs so desperate to seem untouchable, but it is clear to you that jackieâs just lost. and hurt.
and then came the nightmares, too.
you start to wake at night to the sound of her gasping, a sharp cry muffled into the blanket she clutches around her. she mustâve shot up, her breaths coming fast and shallow, and for a moment, you think she might wake everyone else. but the others keep sleeping, too used to the sounds of restless nights to stir. thatâs how it starts because you -unsure of what else to do- only reach out and put a hand on her shoulder. jackie flinches, not expecting anyone else to be up at this time. you two never talk about it afterwards but you feel the way she instantly melts into your touch.
that small gesture is what makes you realize how much youâve missed being close to another person.
after this, it is like a switch has been flipped: jackie is fixated on always lingering in your presence, eager for any kind of touch she can get, whether itâs a brush of hands, her palm to your back, or sitting shoulder to shoulder. she even picks up certain chores just to be near you. whether it is a desperate attempt for proximity and closeness or a real crush thatâll keep on growing beyond this place where youâre stuck, it feels nice to be wanted like this.
one of these nights, with the cabin quiet and the air heavy with the sound of soft snores and the occasional crackle of the dying fire, jackie takes things one step further.
everyone else is huddled together for warmth, but in the farthest corner of the room, itâs just you. or at least it was, until jackie had slipped down beside you, her breath visible in the freezing air as she sits close -closer than she needs to.
she whispers, careful not to wake the others, âitâs freezing. youâre practically an icicle over here,â she hesitates, her hands tugging at her blanket as if trying to decide what to say next. after another moment, she ventures, âi donât know how youâre even handling it. i feel like my fingers might fall off any secondâ
her eyes flicker to yours, searching for something. permission, maybe, to come even closer than she already is. âyou know,â she says lightly, almost offhand, âitâd probably be warmer if we shared. not that anyone would care⊠or even notice.â
she doesnât press it further, leaving the idea hanging between you. sure, the two of you have shared your moments before, but you certainly hadnât spent the night cuddling yet.
the silence stretches out, her gaze darting to yours again, waiting for any sign. and then you shift, just a little, leaning closer, not quite touching but enough to give her what she needs. the corner of her mouth twitches, and without a word, she slides her blanket open, wrapping it around the both of you as she settles closer.
jackie voice is barely above a whisper, the words brushing against your ear. âthis is okayâŠright?â
you nod, softly, knowing sheâll see from where sheâs curled up against you from behind. like this, the two of you lie in silence for a good while. you know jackie is awake still: you can feel the way she occasionally shifts, or how her breathing wonât still in a way that it would if she was asleep.
itâs strange, how natural this feels: being this close to someone, so comfortably tangled together after such a long time. a part of you had forgotten how it would feel. another part, the one thatâs been falling in love with jackie taylor long before your plane crashed, longs to have her even closer and tries its very hardest not to allow your mind to wanderâŠ
jackie, on the other hand, hasnât felt this close to any of the other girls either. without thinking, her hand moves of its own accord, around you to rest on your stomach. her fingers are cold, even through your layers of clothing. she brushes them lightly over your skin, the touch gentle. you audibly gulp, but let her.
after another moment, you are finally brave enough to shift. you lift yourself up and adjust until youâre facing her. jackieâs hand remains on the dip of your waist underneath the blanket.
your bodies are flush against each other, your breaths mingling in the sliver of air between you. jackieâs eyes widen a fraction as you turn, her hand instinctively tightening its grip on your waist. the shift in your position has brought you even closer together.
her hand slides further, fingertips tracing over the shape of your hip. âyouâre still cold,â she murmurs, her voice low and hushed in the quiet cabin. her eyes rake over you, her gaze lingering over the curve of your lips.
âit is cold in hereâ you point out, shivering at the realization of her wandering eyes. jackie isnât exactly subtle about it either. after all, thereâs not much sheâs ever wanted that she didnât get.
her touch is moving from your hip down to the curve of your thigh. her fingers dance over the fabric of your pants underneath the blanket. sheâs still fixated on your mouth, her breath hitching as she sees the way you shiver under her gaze.
jackie leans in a little closer when she feels the way your legs fall open under her hands, her lips nearly brushing against your ear as she whispers, âyou know, i think iâve got a few more ways i could help warm you upâŠâ her hand moves again, sliding further up your thigh.
itâs pathetic, really. itâs a desperate attempt to cling to normality. to feel wanted in spite of everything. itâs a short moment in the terrors of the wilderness that she wonât speak about in the morning. but, fuck it, youâre willing to take it.
your breath hitches in your throat when jackieâs hand inches up your leg, a small noise slipping from your lips. immediately, jackie hushes you.
âshâ she says, eyes darting to where the others are fast asleep. âwe have to be quietâ and with that, your last restraints are gone. it only confirms what jackie is up to right now -if it hadnât been clear yet, it certainly is now. and while you know, rationally, that this is a bad idea, the need to feel someoneâs touch is too strong for you to neglect it any longer: awkward attempts of trying to get off under the covers whilst everyone else sleeps are clearly not doing enough for you.
at least jackie seems to be on the same page.
you both shift and adjust against each other. itâs a little clumsy, and it takes a moment to find a good position, but itâs driven by the need for something youâve both been craving, so you make it work. before you know it, jackie lingers above you in a way that has her center pressing against your own under the sheets.
she exhales a shuddered breath and your hands jump up to hold her hips. your eyes are wide as you stare up at her, partly in disbelief that this is happening, mostly because you canât believe that jackie wants you like this.
jackie leans in, not kissing you yet, but with her arms bracing her weight on either side of your head, caging you in. her eyes are dark, her gaze flickering over your features in a way that makes your stomach flip.
beneath the covers, her legs shift, her body pushing further into yours, grinding against you for the first time, in a way that is deliberate and calculated. her breath stutters, her voice hoarse as she speaks, âyouâve gotta be-â she gasps, and bites her lip, resisting the moan that threatens to escape. âquietâ
oh, how you wish you couldâve met her under different circumstances. how you wish jackie couldâve wanted you like this all the way back home, so you couldâve heard the way she sounds when sheâs moving on top of you.
when you finally come back to your senses, you decide to make the most of this opportunity. holding her hips a little tighter, you lift your own from the ground to meet her halfway.
jackie, whoâs only ever known sex to be something merely mediocre, is surprised that grinding against you (fully clothed, and in a room full of sleeping people that prevent you from going all the way) is already better than anything sheâs ever had.
she shivers as you take the initiative, matching her movements with a gasp that she barely manages to bite back. she arches into you, her body moving steadily now.
her hands slide up your sides, fingers slipping under the edge of your shirt to feel the warm skin of your stomach. she leans in, her breath a shaky, quiet: âgod, yesâŠjust like thatâŠâ
you can feel your own underwear, clinging to your arousal which is growing exponentially at this rate. thereâs no way youâll last long like this, not when youâre embarrassingly close to creaming your pants just from watching her. each of your movements is mirrored by one of hers, until youâve found a good rhythm to grind against the other. at some point, jackieâs body goes slack and she drops forward. you instantly hold her to your chest as she keeps rutting against you, moaning the faintest little âah, ah, ahâ sounds into your ear.
the friction between you spikes, both of you desperate and greedy for more connection. your hips keep meeting in a slow, steady rhythm, both pushing and pulling each other into deeper contact.
her hands are still wandering over your body, exploring every inch of your skin she can reach through the clothing thatâs supposed to keep you warm but is severely restricting right now.
she draws you closer, her mouth by your ear, her voice a low, husky whisper, âi want youâŠi want you so badlyâŠâ she whispers. whether jackie means it or not, it works on you.
âdonât stopâ you tell her, rocking into her equally desperately. at this point you can only pray that no one will hear the creaking floor boards. the sheets are a tangled mess around the two of you, the covers having slipped down to her waist as the heat between you escalates.
âjackieâ you whisper, hoping the urgency to your tone will get the message across. judging by the way she nods erratically, that seems to be the case.
âyeahâ she says, bobbing her head still. âyeah, me tooâ
you, embarrassed as you are, cum first. itâs quiet, your lips parted in a silent scream as jackieâs constant rocking sends you stumbling over the edge youâve been toeing since she began straddling you. she watches you fall apart beneath her, not once slowing down or stopping altogether, determined to make herself cum too.
her eyes flutter and she struggles to keep her breathing steady as her hold on you tightens. âdonât- donât you dare stop-â she hisses, your pleasure not yet ebbing by the time she follows. jackie is beautiful, obviously, but youâve never seen something that could ever compare to her when she makes herself come against you: her head falls back and her eyes close tightly. sheâs biting her lower lip so harshly she could be drawing blood for the sake of not being too loud.
finally, after her body has gone tense for a couple of seconds, jackie slumps against you. sheâs panting right into your ear, unable to speak as her orgasm washes over her. you can feel her thighs trembling around yours as she recovers.
for a few moments, the only sound in the room is the ragged breathing of the two of you as the silence hangs heavy in the air. the cabin is quiet, the rest of the team blissfully unaware of what just happened a few feet away.
âholy shitâ you finally breathe, unsure of what else to do or say. thankfully, jackie doesnât move away like a part of you had anticipated. she stays right there, on top of you, giving you the courage to hesitantly wrap your arms around her and hold her to your chest.
if you don't move, you'll fall asleep like this and the others will have plenty of questions in the morning. still, neither of you has got the strength to get up, to move away from the heat you're providing. your eyes grow heavy before you know it. it's the first night of good sleep in a long time.
#jackie taylor áČŠ#Ëđ Ì !! mdni#đȘ© anon#jackie taylor x reader#jackie taylor x female reader#jackie taylor x fem!reader#jackie taylor x you#jackie taylor#yellowjackets#yellowjackets x reader#yellow jackets x female reader#yellow jackets x you
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Unspoken Understandings
part 2 to âShattered Silenceâ (Jayce Talis x reader)
Part 1
Summary: After that fateful night in the lab both ,Jayce and you, have been unsure how to address the sudden shift in your dynamic. However, sometimes all it takes is a certain yordle to force Jayce to take a break from his work and leave the lab.
Warnings: none, no spoilers for s2, no canon plot, a good amount of domestic fluff
Notes: I am really REALLY surprised about how much love âShattered Silenceâ has received and hope that you enjoy this follow up just as much. <3 Once again , this has been written in my notes app, I hope I didnât miss any mistakes.
Tagsđ·ïž @a-queen-blr @anxious-doodler @brabuscoffwe
The days after the break-in were a blur of frantic packing and moving. You had to find a new place fastânothing too fancy, just something safe, something that could hold your things and the remaining bits of your research. But the weight of it all pressed down on you, your muscles aching from days spent running between your old and new apartment. You didnât have the luxury of time to process what had happened the night you stormed into the lab, or even think much about him.
But the nightsâŠ
The nights were when you couldnât stop thinking about how, despite everything, Jayce had held you. How, for a brief moment, you had leaned into him without fear of rejection. Youâd allowed yourself to feel vulnerable, and he hadnât pushed you away.
Now, you found yourself trying to ignore the gnawing feeling in your chest every time you thought about him, but the silence between you both felt suffocating.
Meanwhile, Jayce had buried himself in his work. The breakthrough heâd been chasing for months was nearly within reach, and that goal, that obsession, kept him up at night. But even as his mind raced with equations and possibilities, something nagged at himâa thought that he couldnât shake, no matter how hard he tried.
It had started that night when you had collapsed into his arms, your trembling form clinging onto him like a lifeline. The way your body had felt in his embrace, how you had allowed him to hold and comfort you⊠something about it just felt right. And the days since? It was almost like he couldn't think straight without you. Your presence had become something he couldnât quite get out of his head. Every time he closed his eyes, your face would appearâraw, vulnerable, but somehow more real than anything else in his life.
But what exactly was that thing between you? Was it something real, or just the aftershock of an unexpected and stressful situation? Jayce couldnât even bring himself to ask.
---
It was late when Heimerdinger found him pacing in the lab, his mind so tangled in equations that the pieces didnât seem to fit anymore.
âYouâre working too hard, Jayce.â Heimerdingerâs voice was calm, but there was a quiet insistence behind it. He hadnât seen the young inventor so distracted in what felt like ages.
Jayce, who had been scribbling furiously on a piece of paper, didnât even look up. âIâm close to figuring this out. I just need a few more adjustments,â he said, but his voice lacked the usual tone of conviction.
Heimerdinger tilted his head slightly, his sharp gaze studying the younger man. It didnât take long for him to figure out the nature of the inventorâs problems. âYou were always quick to tell me how distracting it was when you were around her. How you could hardly think clearly when she was near.â Heimerdinger spoke , a nonchalant tone covering up the intention behind his statement.
Jayce froze, his pen hovering mid-air. He couldnât remember ever having said that, but since the incident the times of feeling annoyed by you felt so far away. He wouldnât be surprised if it was true. That really had been how heâd felt around you, hadnât it? You had always found a way of breaking through his concentration, making him second-guess his thoughts and decisions.
But now? He didnât feel distracted anymore. The thought of you didnât pull him away from his workâit was more like you were... quieting the noise in his mind. Every time he thought about you, his thoughts slowed, calmed. The gears in his brain didnât spin at a hundred miles per hour anymore. They⊠rested.
Sighing, Jayce met Heimerdingerâs knowing gaze. "Itâs not the same,â he said, his voice quieter now, unsure. âItâs... different.â
Heimerdinger gave him a pointed look, crossing his arms behind his back as he looked up at the young man. âYouâve been working non-stop for days, Jayce. Sometimes the best breakthroughs come when we step away from the work for a little while. Youâre going to burn yourself out if you keep this up."
Jayce opened his mouth to argue, but Heimerdinger was already walking toward the door. âIâm forcing you out of here. Take a break. Go see her,â he said, an almost cheerful tone in his voice. And with that, he was gone.
Jayce sat in stunned silence for a moment, the yordleâs words hanging in the air. Go see her? If he was honest to himself, he hadnât even thought about it. A part of his mind harbouring a feeling of anxiousness regarding the inevitable confrontation. But something in Heimerdingerâs voice made him hesitate. It was as if the older man had seen through all the layers of self-doubt Jayce had buried himself under.
With the scrape of his chair he stood up. He needed to get out of the lab. He needed to breathe. He needed to see you.
---
It wasnât hard to find your new place. Jayce had always been able to track down anything and anyone, with easeâPiltover wasnât exactly a large city after all.
But as he stood outside your new apartment, his stomach churned. The weight of everything he had avoided saying hung over him like a dark storm cloud. He had no idea how this would play outâwhat could he even say? That he hadnât been able to think straight since the night youâd come to him? That heâd wanted to be there for you, but had no clue how to navigate what had happened between you both?
But before he could completely lose his nerve, the door to the apartment opened, and you appeared.
You looked⊠tired. Your hair was pulled back in a messy up-do, and your shirt was slightly wrinkled, but there was something comforting about the chaos surrounding you. Not wanting to stare , his golden eyes quickly drifting to the space behind you. It was clearly your place now, your sanctuary, but it was still a work in progress.
You saw him before he could even open his mouth to say anything, and a flicker of surprise crossed your face. âJayce? What are youââ
âIâuh, I came to check on you,â he said, running a hand through his hair, suddenly awkward. His nervous gaze switching back and forth between you and the wood on your door. âSee how youâre doing⊠with the new place and everything.â
You raised an eyebrow but stepped aside, allowing him to enter. âWell,â you said with a tired half-smile, âitâs been a lot of work. Still donât know where half my things are.â
Jayce chuckled as he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. His mind reeling at how your presence suddenly made him feel less anxious, like he didnât have to carry his burdens anymore . Not here, not now.
You motioned toward a pile of boxes in the corner of the living room, your smile sheepish, almost apologetic. âYou wouldnât happen to be good at putting together furniture, would you?â
Without a second thought, Jayce was moving toward the pile, rolling up his sleeves with a quiet determination. âI can manage,â he said with a grin, glancing back at you. âBut only if you promise not to laugh at my attempts.â
You smirked, feeling a flicker of warmth in your chest. âNo promises,â you teased, but there was a lightness in your voice now where tiredness had been before.
For the next few hours, the two of you worked side by side, not really talking, but filling the space between you with easy silence. There was something almost intimate in the simplicity of itâa shared task, each moment feeling like it stitched something new into the fabric of your newfound connection. The screech of a screwdriver, the soft clink of metal against wood, and the occasional, shared chuckle when one of you fumbledâit was like you were building something together, but not just the furniture. It was this. Whatever it was that had started to grow between you.
You worked in rhythm, so comfortable with him that it didnât even feel strange. You caught yourself looking up at him a few times, watching the way he moved, how the muscles in his arms flexed when assembling the pieces and silently admiring the way the light caught the lines of his face. Jayce wasnât just the scientist, the bold, sometimes aloof figure you'd knownâhere, in this space, he felt⊠real. Vulnerable, even. The arrogant mask you had become so accustomed to had slipped away, leaving only the person beneath. And for the first time, you saw him as someone who was just as human as you.
When the last piece of furniture was assembled, both of you collapsed onto the couch. The apartment was still a mess, but somehow, it felt more like home now. After hours of unpacking, moving boxes, and trying to make sense of the chaos, you and Jayce had both reached a kind of quiet, shared exhaustion. There was something about the way the late afternoon light filtered through the windowsâgolden and warmâthat made everything feel a little less overwhelming.
Jayce was beside you on the couch, leaning back against the cushions with his sleeves still rolled up, hair unkempt and his face still a little flushed from the work. Normally, by now youâd be bickering with each other, exchanging sarcastic remarks til one of you would have enough and storm out of the room. But ever since your distraught form had stormed into his lab, that usual dynamic was missing. The crackling back-and-forth had faded into something quieter, something more... honest.
âSo, this is it, huh?â you said, glancing around the room. It was a mix of completed and incomplete, a snapshot of a new beginning. âStill a long way to go, but... itâs getting there.â
Jayce surveyed the room, his gaze lingering on the boxes and the half-finished furniture scattered around. âItâs... definitely not what I expected,â he said, his lips twitching into a smile. âYou still got a ton of stuff for someone who has been robbed.â You laughed lightly, but it wasnât a tense laugh like it would have been just a few days ago. It was more... genuine.
The silence stretched a little longer, and you found yourself thinking about how easily you used to hide behind the jabs and insults. You had both spent so much time pretendingâpretending that you couldnât stand each other, pretending like there was nothing more beneath the surface. But nevertheless, despite years of constant back and forth, Jayce had been the one your heart had led you to when your mind was in a state of absolute panic.
âYou know, Iâve spent a lot of time pretending,â you said softly, looking at him from the corner of your eye. âPretending like we couldnât get along, pretending like I didnât... care.â
Jayceâs eyes flicked over to you, something unreadable in his gaze. For a moment, he didnât respond, allowing the truth to settle between you.
âI think I was pretending, too,â he said finally, his voice low and honest. âPretending I didnât want... this.â He gestured loosely between you two, his hand hovering in the air, as if the words were more difficult to articulate than the feelings behind them.
There it was. That truth you had both danced around for so long. And now, it didnât feel awkward. It felt like a breath you both had been holding ever since Jayce had comforted you that fateful night, waiting for the right moment to exhale.
You turned toward him, your body instinctively moving closer. You didnât have to think about it. The space between you was just too small now, too important to leave empty. As if by reflex, your hand reached out, softly brushing his arm, letting your fingers rest gently against his. The touch was tentative at first but you felt him respond instantlyâhis hand turning slightly, his fingers seeking yours, meeting you halfway.
It was subtle, a small connection that sent a rush of warmth through you. Neither of you said anything. The words didnât feel necessary anymore. Jayce shifted a little, his knee brushing against yours, his hand gently drawing you closer. He wasnât in a rush. You werenât either. But as the space between you closed even more, something shifted, and you both knew the moment was right.
Jayceâs thumb traced along the back of your hand, his touch light but deliberate. Slowly, he turned toward you, his body leaning in, and you could feel his breath on your lips before his mouth even touched yours. It wasnât a desperate move, but one full of quiet intent, like this was something that had been building between you for far too long.
His lips met yours gently at firstâjust a soft brush, testing, as though waiting for you to pull away. But you didnât. Neither of you did. The kiss deepened, slowly, naturally. His hand moved to your jaw, tilting your head slightly as his other hand slid around your waist, his electric touch finding its way underneath your shirt, pulling you closer. The warmth of his body against yours felt so right, so easy, just like it had back in the lab when he had shielded you from your troubles, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
You melted into him. There was no rush, no hesitation now. Just the soft pressure of his lips on yours, the tender way his hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing over your cheek as if memorizing the feel of of your skin underneath his fingertips.
When you pulled back, there was no immediate rush to fill the space with words. The air between you felt charged, but in a quiet, intimate way. You both breathed deeply, your lips tingling from the kiss, your pulse still racing a marathon in your chest.
Jayceâs hand lingered on your waist, his thumb absently tracing circles on your skin. âGuess we donât have to pretend to not like each other anymore,â he murmured, his voice hushed, almost unsure, like the weight of everything was finally settling in. You shook your head slightly, a smile tugging at the corner of your lips as your hand found his again. âNo. I guess not.â
Jayce leaned back into the couch, his body angled closer to yours now. His eyes twinkled with that familiar teasing glint, but there was something new in the way he looked at you. Something lighter. âSo, dinner? I think Iâve earned it.â
You chuckled, your fingers still intertwined with his as you stood. âYouâve already helped me move half my furniture, Jayce. Youâre definitely sticking around.â
He flashed you a relaxed grin, leaning back against the couch with a satisfied sigh. âGuess I donât have a choice.â
Letting go of his hand, you turned toward the kitchen, starting to gather ingredients, and Jayce followed you, leaning in just enough to rest his chin on your shoulder. âNeed any help?â
You glanced at him with a smile. âUnless youâve got a Hextech gadget to chop vegetables, Iâve got it under control.â
Jayce chuckled and stepped back, settling in at the table as you started to prepare a meal. There was something comforting in his quiet presence, in the easy rhythm of the evening. You moved around each other effortlessly, the space between you filled with warmth rather than words.
Soon enough, you set the table and sat down together, the simple meal feeling more like a shared moment than just food. Jayce took a bite, then raised an eyebrow in approval. âIâm impressed. Didnât expect you to be this good at it.â
You laughed, your fingers brushing his as you reached for your drink. âIâm full of surprises.â He smiled at that, his eyes lingering on your face , as if trying to capture the moment.
After dinner, you started to clear the table and do the dishes when Jayce moved to help. You smiled and gently took the dish towel from his hands. âIâve got this,â you said softly. He gave you a mock pout in return. âI was just getting into it.â Looking up at him, you smiled fondly at his behaviour. âYouâve done enough for today.â
Jayce stepped closer, golden eyes soft as his hand reached out for the towel again. âI donât mind,â he murmured, his warmth filling the tiny space of your kitchen and wrapping around you like a safety blanket.
âThanks,â you whispered, cheeks burning with a soft blush as you suddenly felt the quiet comfort of his presence in a way that made everything else feel far away.
Jayce leaned in to brush a kiss against your forehead, light but sincere. âAnytime.â
And just like that, everything felt perfectly in place.
#arcane#arcane netflix#jayce talis#arcane x reader#arcane jayce#jayce talis x reader#arcane imagines#jayce x reader#arcane jayce x reader#jayce arcane x reader#jayce talis imagine
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Would you mind writing about Vernon with the angst prompt #22 and second chance prompt #36? Thank you so much mđ
of course!! thank you for requesting such a good combo!!! đ€
request your own: full prompt list!
check out my masterlist! // hansol's m.list
angst prompt #22: "I can't lose you again." +
second chance prompt #36: "you're still the first person i think of when i hear good news."
hansol didnât think heâd ever have this moment again.
you, standing in front of him, looking at him like you were waiting for him to speak, waiting for him to say something that mattered.
it had been months. months since that fight, months since the slammed door, months since the version of him that loved you was tucked away in a part of him he didnât think he could reach again. except he did reach it. every time he saw something funny. every time he heard a song youâd love. every time someone said your name.
and now you were here, and he was scrambling, piecing together fragments of himself that shattered the day he lost you.
âyou look... good,â he managed, voice breaking on the second word.
your lips curled into a faint smile. âso do you.â
but you didnât. not really. not to him.
you looked tired, as if youâd carried something heavy all the way to him, and hansol wondered if he was the weight youâd been dragging behind you all this time.
âwhat are you doing here?â he asked softly, hands shoved deep into his pockets to keep them from shaking.
you hesitated. he knew you hated confrontation, and part of him wanted to tell you it was okay, that you didnât owe him anything. but the other partâthe bigger partâcouldnât stand to see you turn away again.
âi donât know,â you said finally, voice as fragile as glass. âi just⊠i guess i needed to see you.â
he couldnât breathe.
âwhy?â
you laughed, but it wasnât the laugh he missed. this one was bitter, almost sad.
âi guess i was hoping you could tell me,â you admitted. the words falling out of mouth like an apology.
hansol took a step closer, his hands twitching at his sides. he didnât dare touch you, not yet, not when it felt like you might disappear if he blinked too hard.
and hansol realized something thenâhe didnât care why. all he cared about was that you were here.
âi thought about you,â he confessed, the words spilling out before he could stop them.
your eyes met his, wide and unsure, and hansol pressed on, desperate to fill the silence between you.
âevery day,â he said, his voice cracking under the weight of it all. âeven when i tried not to. i thought about you.â
you didnât say anything, and hansol felt the panic rising in his chest.
âyouâre still the first person i think of when i hear good news,â he admitted, his hands curling into fists. âevery time something happens, i want to tell you. and then i remember i canât. not anymore,â
your breath hitched, and hansol felt like he was unraveling, the words pouring out faster than he could catch them.
âi canât lose you again,â he said, the desperation thick in his voice. ânot after this. not afterââ
âhansol.â
your voice was soft but firm, and it stopped him in his tracks.
you stepped closer, your eyes searching his face for something he didnât know if he could give you.
âwhy?â you asked, echoing his earlier question.
âbecause youâre here,â he said, and it was the only answer he had. âbecause i never stopped wanting to fix this. fix us. but i didnât know how. i didnât know if you wanted me to.â
you didnât say anything right away, and hansolâs heart felt like it was seconds away from shattering.
âdo you?â he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
you looked down, your fingers twitching like you were debating something, and when you looked back up, there was something in your eyes that hansol hadnât seen in months.
âi donât know,â you said honestly, and it felt like a punch to the gut.
but then your lips quirked into the faintest of smiles, and hansol felt the slightest flicker of hope.
âmaybe,â you said, and hansol realized that maybe was enough. maybe meant there was a chance.
âcan we try?â he asked, his voice trembling.
you didnât answer, not with words. but when your fingers brushed against his, hesitant and unsure, hansol felt the air return to his lungs.
he didnât know what would happen next. he didnât know if this was the start of something new or the beginning of another heartbreak.
but when your hand slipped into his, he decided it didnât matter.
#seventeen#seventeen imagine#svt#svt x reader#seventeen fluff#svt fluff#seventeen x reader#svt angst#seventeen angst#angst seventeen#vernon imagine#vernon fluff#vernon angst#vernon fanfic#chwe hansol angst#chwe hansol fanfic#chwe hansol imagines#chwe vernon#hansol vernon chwe#chwe hansol x reader#chwe hansol fluff#chwe hansol#vernon x reader#vernon#vernon seventeen#seventeen vernon#chwe hansol vernon x reader#chwe hansol vernon#daisymbin: reqs
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