#if y'all can recognize the building in the background congrats u know where i've been these past four years lol

[camera-seventeen]

tl;dr this fossil fan is now a fossil fan with a degree and here’s an 900 word essay about her six year-long love for svt

Hi everyone, Maddy here.

A couple of weeks ago when I finished up my last classes as an undergraduate, one my tlist reminded me about how I chose to stop posting as frequently on this blog because I was starting school. Now that I had my official graduation ceremony today, I thought I would hop on and share my experiences and musings from this side of the tunnel as a long-time SVT fan.

Recently, my friends who are starting to get into K-pop (took y’all long enough) ask me why SVT is my favorite group. Usually, I reply with a simple, “Because they’re my kids.” But I really just say that because it’s a heavily abbreviated summation of these past six years. The fuller answer is this:

In the summer of 2013, by some stroke of fate, I got curious about 17TV after seeing an article about it. I decided to tune in to see what it was all about, and somehow I was hooked. I still don’t know what was so enthralling about seeing a huge group of boys roaming around a practice room in 240p, but there I was. This was the summer before my junior year of high school, and I distinctly remember carrying around my phone and watching the 17TV UStream in the car as I went and toured colleges. Soon enough, I made a blog dedicated to this new group, taught myself how to make GIFs on Photoshop, and started getting deeper into the fandom, then called SM17Es.

As I trudged on through high school, one highlight would be waking up early in the morning to watch 17TV and then frantically gif-ing all the good moments before school. As I studied for tests and prepared for projects, I was cheering for SVT. I would get overjoyed when there was news of them holding a performance or making an appearance somewhere. I, as I’m sure the boys were to a much larger extent, was anxious for their debut, and I was disappointed when months passed and Hot Debut 2014 came and went, as did some of the members. By that time, I was a senior in high school and I was stressed out about college. But I kept coming back and checking up on SVT – they were both my home and my escape.

At the beginning of December in 2014, I found out I was accepted to college. A couple of weeks later, SVT performed at SAF (long live Taste + Bed Breaker). Maybe I didn’t feel it much back then, but retrospectively, we were mirroring each other more than I thought – every time I took a step forward, SVT would too, and vice versa.

I have never been one to get too sappy about K-pop news, but the announcement of 17 Project was an emotional one. I remember shaking and thinking, “It’s finally happening.” Somehow, my reaction to 13 boys getting one step closer to debut was almost the same as getting confirmation that I would be going to university. As the school year was wrapping up, I remember streaming episodes and bringing my laptop around to help sub the show with Like17Subs.

Then, of course, on May 26, Seventeen made their debut with Adore U on the last episode of 17 Project. I was up in the middle of the night watching the whole thing unfold, gripping my bed’s headboard as I witnessed them perform their own funky pop song with fun and fresh lyrics to match Seventeen’s age. A couple hours later at school, I told my friends, “It was everything I hoped for and more.” I obsessively promoted SVT to all of them, even changing our group chat name to #Buy17CaratOniTunes and streaming the music video on the computers in the journalism room. A little over a week later, I graduated from high school.

I’m sure many of you know how Seventeen’s career has unfolded since then. But as the boys grew bigger and bigger, my presence online grew smaller. I stopped staying up for releases and obsessively refreshing social media pages for updates. Still, in those four years, my love for Seventeen never wavered, and my life remained inexplicably intertwined with SVT events. For instance, the first time I saw SVT live, they performed Pretty U, the song that got them their first win. And in the summer before my senior year of college, I was able to attend Ideal Cut and witness the boys I’ve loved for a quarter of my life perform up close in the standing section.

And now here I am, freshly graduated from college and back writing a post on the blog where this all began nearly six years ago. I don’t think I could sit here and say practically that Seventeen helped me get my degree or that K-pop is life-changing (because, let’s face it, K-pop is just K-pop), but in Seventeen I definitely think I found a partner that has been with me through some of my most important events. I may not be a fan who has gone to dozens of concerts or owns lots of merch or even has an official fanclub membership (lol), but through this partnership, I was able to meet people and gain new experiences that I wouldn’t trade for the world. I don’t know what the future holds for me or for Seventeen, but if there’s one thing I wish I could tell Seventeen personally, it’s that I will continue to grow alongside them as a Carat forever.