#if this hypothetical video contained no mocking of a disability or threats of harm to the customer etc. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mothmansboyfriend · 3 months ago

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Someone having a bad attitude/rude articulation is not the same as someone being personally mean/harmful/offensive to you.

If you can walk away from a discussion confident that neither of you said anything worth wishing you could take back then congratulations: you’ve had the real life equivalent of a negative friendliness action in the Sims and there are NO permanent negative bodily consequences! Get back on the horse, your next social interaction with someone else could easily be far better.

My hands get tense and painful when I feel socially rejected, I can fully understand it sucks bad to receive attitude you feel undeserving of especially when you perceive yourself as working hard for unconscious social praise. But just like two autistics with different stimulation needs can’t both be happy in the exact same environment “made for autistics”, not everyone can have a pleasant reaction in a social convention “meant to be pleasant” because people can’t control their physical symptoms of frustration any more than I can control that my mind goes blank and I stutter or go silent when I’m genuinely (and irrationally) scared about answering simple questions.

As humans we are all owed common decency. Common decency is not semi-conditional kindness. It’s just respect for the unknown of a person. Offering basic comforts/requirements as you feel is natural, non-threatening environment for your personal life, acknowledging you exist when you arrive and wishing you well when you depart. That is common decency. Smiling, speaking in a specific tone, and forcing your body language to work for the comfort of a group rather than flow naturally as you react to stimuli, that is kindness. It’s nice to receive kind actions from strangers, but no one is owed these things. Even if you paid for a burger or got lost in the supermarket for two hours.

#I won’t deny there’s bad ppl in customer service who ARE objectively mean and abrasive #but I feel like there’s way less of them than there are just kinda. yknow.#bitchy people 🤷🏼‍♀️#I’m one of them now #I didn’t used to be #just. idk. be mindful of if you’re seeing boogie men bc of past experiences #I understand when it’s your doctor or boss who’s genuinely indecent to you #it’s a matter of safety to then lower your trust and expectations of people in that group #but when you’re scolding the entirety of customer service for complaining publicly and saying WELL WHAT IF #youre straw manning. you’re thinking ‘what if I saw a video complaining about ME one day’#and I’m sorry if that were to happen and they were straight up bullying you!!!#but I think if you see a video where a server is complaining about how an interaction went down #where THEY felt dehumanized so in turn they were a bit rude to the customer #and your reaction is to think of it as an exertion of power over you bc you had smth similar BUT DIFFERENT IN NATURE AND IMPACT #you’re not seeing the big picture #if this hypothetical video contained no mocking of a disability or threats of harm to the customer etc.#the server is literally just venting about a social interaction that frustrated them bc being frustrated feels!! uncomfortable!!!#this doesn’t mean they go around judging and hating everyone that happens to behave in a similar way SOMETIMES when pushed to a limit #they’re venting with the context that they have to go through these frustrations FREQUENTLY #erasing that context makes it seem like Customer Service Workers as a group enter social interactions seeking conflict #and while it may seem common bc of sensationalism I assure you the majority of the time we are not escalating things #and we don’t let ableist people just mock others comfortabley. truly I’m sorry if this is your most common experience #just remember like. a lot of us are disabled too.#I know it’s a privilege to be ABLE to work but it is still very much a burden bc we HAVE to #disabled ppl who can’t work have so little control in their lives and I’m sympathetic to that #but I feel like it creates this huge rift with disabled ppl who can work #bc we’re perceived as having so much more control over our finances #but we dontttt. we don’t. a lot of customer vs employee spats are just ppl going band for band w disabilities #we just aren’t aware of each other in the moment #basically love each other even if it means leaving an interaction a bit sullen

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