#if there are any typos.... just stfu and eat your food

[laconchadetumadre]

Sorry to rant but

I actually liked kyman when i started getting into South Park because of their dynamic and Cartman's obvious obsession with kyle. I'm a big fan of enemies to lovers too, so Kyman checked all the boxes for me.

However, Gingercow changed my perspective of them. I remember finding this episode in a "Kyman centered episodes" list. I only made it up until the first scene where Cartman farts on Kyle before pausing and just staring at a wall for some time. I didn't finish it, but that scene alone made me so... uncomfortable.

I'm only sharing my first impression of the episode (and i doubt this was even intended on Matt and Trey's part) but it felt like a rape allegory. It felt like Kyle was being raped by Cartman and i couldnt stand to watch it. It wasnt just because of the literal grossness of the scene, but the fact that it was Kyle being forced to submit.

At first, i felt like maybe Matt and Trey were trying to shut down Kyman shippers, so i decided to pretend that the episode didn't happen. I was aware that it had been selected by a shipper as a "Kyman" episode, but i thought it was probably a joke or just a one-time thing, no biggie.

Then the Post Covid specials dropped and a good portion of Kyman shippers blamed Kyle and were upset at him for Cartman's ending. The fact that so many posts dunking on kyle were particularly popular with kyman shippers only made me relate less and less to them. Atp i felt like most kyman shippers only cared about cartman.

After that i couldnt stop noticing how unfair they were to kyle, always expecting him to look out for cartman, to put up with his bullshit while also putting up a fight (to keep up the "sexual tension", ugh) but then calling him bitchy for his reactions to being harassed or saying he has anger issues. I felt like my interpretation of his character was completely different from the majority of Kyman shippers, so i distanced myself from their community and the fandom for a while.

The appeal of kyman to me was that, if cartman were to have a crush on kyle, it kinda gave kyle a little power over him. However, most kyman shippers seem to interpret their relationship similarly to hannigram or other toxic relationships that are romanticized. So, in their eyes, kyle should embrace cartman as he is, cause that's a metaphor for idk homosexuality and eroticisim or something.

All that is fine, really, I fucking love hannigram but thats because they are usually written in a way that empowers will (the victim) over hannibal (the aggressor). They still explore will's "darker" side without trying to justify all the shit hanni puts him through. And, on top of that, unlike kyman, hannibal and will are MEANT to be seen this way. They were written to be interpreted as a toxic romantic couple. Kyle and Cartman, on the other hand, are meant to be comedic and entertaining only.

Im not saying fanon doesnt have the right to exist, but it does bother me when the fandom acts entitled towards the canon. As in, when fans think they could write the story better than the original author. This is particularly annoying with kyman shippers because, as i have explained, they cant even grasp the concept that cartman. wont. change. Not for kyle or anybody else (not even heidi OR YENTL).

just to wrap things up, i obviously do not support or condone any kind of harassment towards kyman shippers and if anybody has comitted or threatened violent actions on them solely for fan wars genuenly get off the internet and go see a therapist. im also aware some kyman shippers follow me and im ok with that! i like kyman fanarts sometimes but i just wanted to share my personal reasons as to why i distance myself from this part of the fandom.

TLDR;

kyman is bad because it is abusive and extremely ooc and kyman shippers are wrong for acting entitled and thinking they know cartman and kyle better than mattrey and the rest of the fandom when they, in fact, do not.  also, dont harass anybody over ships.

I need someone to genuinely explain to me why kyman is bad. I don't ship it a lot or anything but sometimes I like the thought of it ig? like oh yeah a healthy relationship between the two would be kinda neat yk? I 100% agree with the people who say an abusive/ unhealthy relationship between them is gross and proship, but I can genuinely see them being happy together. when they're teens ofc bc cartman obviously has some maturing to do. Just take a look at ass burgers or the end of obesity. they care about each other.