#if someone wants to play and is untagged consider yourselves tagged :)

[vaguely-annoyed]

it's early morning where i'm at and i just remembered that tag game @azira-fells helloooo ty for the patience as always, dear :]

shuffle your on repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then tag some others!

lonely girl —the front bottoms

colour me in — VUKOKI

lipstick covered magnet — the front bottoms

head on fire — griff, sigrid

how i'm feeling now — lewis capaldi

more like you — orla gartland

no children — the mountain goats

twin size mattress — the front bottoms

be nice to me — the front bottoms

watch — billie eilish

tagging: @arsenicstrudel @birdbrainrot @capisnotonfire no pressure! :]

[purple-spring]

Feel like lili was confirming sh but still reinforcing that it's none of our business with that caption

Hi, anon! I’m sorry it’s taken me ages to answer this. I’ve had an insanely busy day, I’ve sort of been back and forth with my thoughts on this, and I didn’t want to give a knee-jerk response. So hopefully what I write makes sense.

Two things that I want to address: this idea of confirmation and SH being none of our business. 

On confirmation. Look. If we’re thinking of “confirmation” as the simple acknowledgment of the fact that they’re dating, then I think they’re pretty much confirmed. I still find it puzzling that people respond to SH posts with “did this just confirm SH?!” If I saw two friends of mine flying off for a weekend getaway and then saw these beautiful, intimate photos coming out of that weekend, I’d be very surprised if I found out that they weren’t dating. 

Bit of a tangent, but bear with me here. As someone who has consumed celeb culture for a long, long time, I can tell you right now that celebrities today are far more in control of how the public perceives them than ever before. What most people don’t realise is that the most popular and current forms confirmation are personally endorsed or controlled by the public figure themselves, e.g. a pap walk (i.e. calling the paps on yourselves while you’re out “walking”), or a gushy Instagram post, or a red carpet date. SH haven’t done any of these (Lili’s birthday post is the closest to a “gushy” post, and even then she didn’t really acknowledge Cole as her boyfriend), and I think this is why some people feel that they haven’t actually *CONFIRMED*. 

The math is pretty simple: if you add up everything from the two of them this past year, the sum is this: they are totally 100% a thing and I don’t even know why this is still a debate.

It’s “none of our business.” This is a little more complicated. To be honest, I didn’t read the caption as that at all. I kind of just saw it as Lili’s own funny, self-deprecating take on the photograph, which was super intense and extra and beautiful. I mean, that boudoir was pretty damn boujee.

But okay, let’s consider your perspective - the idea that it’s none of our business. Lili has more than 3 million followers who are seeing this picture pop up on their Instagram feed. It has Cole clearly tagged on it. It’s obviously from their weekend away at San Fran - a weekend they took together, alone. 

There are complex interactions of public and private at play here. On one hand, I feel like, if that caption was as you interpreted, it’s not Lili telling us to buzz off. At most it’s probably just her way of reinforcing the boundary that most SH shippers hold dear, and hold well: never talk to SH about SH. It is never cool to ask them personally about their love lives (particularly if you’re meeting them in person), or to comment on their posts asking them if they are dating. That is a HUGE no-no. If that’s what you meant about their relationship being “none of our business”, then I’m with you. Totally. 

On the other hand, the post is in a public domain and involves two public figures. I feel like at the end of the day, they don’t mind us thinking and knowing that they are together, as long as we’re not bothering them about it. We can ship it, get excited about it, and squee over it, but I think as long as we keep that well away from them (by leaving posts untagged, squeeing to each other in private, etc.), I think we’re in the clear.

So yes, I really don’t think it was a “STEP OFF” post from Lili. I think it was yet another public nod to the fact that they’re together, and even a public acknowledgment of the fact that most people know (“they know that we know!”). But at the same time it’s always good to remember to be mindful and respectful and responsible in our shipping. And your post prompted me to remember that, anon. And to hopefully encourage others to do the same. So thank you. xx