#if someone gifs it ill be euphoric

[francixoxoxo]

BILLY THE KID BASED OFF OF TAYLOR SWIFTS SONG ‘you belong with me’

Like he doesnt realize readers feelings for him because maybe hes caught up with some horrible girl but then ends up with reader after reader silently pining for forever 💕💕

You belong with me⋆.˚𖥔

Billy the Kid x fem!reader

desc; Billy mistakes infatuation for love, choosing another woman over you. You try to keep your feelings for him stifled, as you always have. But you can’t just stand by and watch him be played.

𝐈’𝐯𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐬𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐢𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐱𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐨 𝐨𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞! 𝐇𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐢 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐗𝐨𝐱𝐨

You loved Billy since you could remember.

Even when you first met him, shooting empty bottles off a fence, you found him handsome. Though you watched from afar, sitting in the crook of your claimed oak tree, you could see the practiced skill in his movements. He wasn’t doing anything fancy, wasn’t showing off. Just a young man practicing his aim.

The second day he came to that field, dotted with daisies and wildflowers, he noticed you and Introduced himself. Struck up conversation with the pretty girl up in the tree, reading away. Wasn’t long until he spent more time talking with you than shooting, wasn’t long at all until you knew everything about him and he knew everything about you in turn. A few months until attraction turned into love.

Billy trusted you with information he wouldn’t even tell Jesse, that later on he wouldn’t even tell Charlie or the Regulators. Information he would’ve taken to the grave, had you not come along. And you told him things you never dreamed somebody would lend their ears to. You never loved someone like you loved Billy. You held out hope that he loved you the same. Held out hope for many, many months that as the seasons changed, so would his feelings.

Your hopes were shot when Billy came to the field, full of glee as he sat down beside you against that old oak tree. “What’s got you smiling so hard?” You furrowed your brows, smiling at him. You hadn’t seen him in at least a week. “Where’ve you been?”

“Met a girl.” Billy couldn’t keep his joy to himself. He took off his hat, putting it behind his head as he leaned against the tree and sighing like a wistful teenage girl. You felt anything but euphoric. Your stomach sank to your knees, quite frankly. “She’s great, just great. You’d love ‘er, yanno. I— well, I think I love ‘er.”

You felt like throwing up. Truly sick to the stomach, not even trying to put on a smile. “Love her.” You repeated. He nodded, eyes wide as saucers. He was serious as death, wasn’t he? Oh, God. “How long have you— Who’s ‘her’?” You traded the first question for the most important in your spinning mind.

“Joan.” Billy said the name like it had been the only one he remembered how to say. You swallowed hard.

“Joan Black.” You breathed. You knew her. Your fathers were good friends, actually. She was a sweet girl. Beautiful, too. Oh, you really felt ill at the way he beamed and nodded. “That’s nice.”

It was not nice. Billy’d known her for a week, you found out after you circled back. Walked her home from the market when he saw she had three bags to carry all on her own. One week. One week, and he said he loved her? You felt like something had been torn from deep within you before you could truly appreciate it. Well. You couldn’t be upset, could you?

He wasn’t yours to begin with. So you bit your tongue to stifle a scream, to muffle a good telling-off about the difference between puppy-love infatuation and true, deep love. You sat through excruciating stories and ramblings about Joan for weeks. Painfully sweet descriptions of her dark hair, her gentleness, her apparently expansive knowledge of just about everything. You tried to brush off obvious red flags, because you didn’t want to seem jealous. Which you shouldn’t be.

Because he wasn’t yours to begin with.

What hurt most was that Joan seemed to be a good girl. You couldn’t blame Billy for finding her attractive, both in looks and personality. You tended to beat yourself up over that, until Joan and her father called on your father. It had been maybe two weeks since Billy broke the news to you. While the men talked in the sitting room over a bottle of whiskey, you had the chance to chat with Joan. You let her sit in your favorite rocking chair on the porch, trying to keep from glaring at her, from judging every hair on her head.

You’d never been so jealous. It was vile, the way you thought of her! She was just another girl who’d fallen head over heels for Billy, wasn’t she? You two should’ve gotten along. You opted to bond over him. “I heard ‘bout you and Billy. How’s that going?” The words were like bile on your tongue despite your sugary tone.

Joan shrugged, fixing her dark curls over her shoulder and smiling knowingly. “He’s all-right.” You couldn’t help furrowing your brows.

“Just all-right?”

“Well. He’s like a puppy dog, s’ almost annoyin’.” She rolled her eyes, smirking in good fun. As if this was just girl talk. You felt your stomach wrap itself into tangles. All you managed was a meek, “Oh.”

But she continued over your lame response, “I’m kinda twixt men right now, yanno? There’s Billy, sure… But you know David Peña? The ranchers son?”

It took you a moment to collect yourself enough to speak. What the Hell? Joan had a man like Billy, and she couldn’t accept just that? She just had to have it all, didn’t she? Oh, your blood was bubbling over, you wouldn’t be surprised if you looked down to find your dress stained crimson. “Yeah.” Joan looked at you expectantly, as if she wanted more of a response, so you shifted uncomfortably and nodded. “Peña’s handsome.” You really had to swallow down the bile in your throat to say, “I don’t blame you for wanting both.”

You absolutely did blame her. Billy being taken hurt you, but if you couldn’t have him then you’d atleast want it to be a woman who’d treat him right. You’d at least want to be able to admit that she was better than you. Joan smiled appreciatively, going on to talk about something you couldn’t care less about.

All you could feel was a strange.. satisfaction. It was selfish. So, so unbelievably selfish of you. But this meant that you hadn’t been bested. Joan wasn’t the better woman for Billy, not even close. It meant that you may have a chance.

Your hopes soared as you met Billy at the oak tree again. You weren’t sure how to break it to him, and suddenly, when you were looking into his eyes, you felt awful. How could you have been happy? Joan’s infidelity would crush his heart. What was a chance at being Billy’s girl when he’d be heartbroken?

Atleast, you felt bad until you finally got the words past your lips, and he looked at you like you were the devil. His jaw ticked, his eyes harshening as he stood up and told you, “Joan’d never. Don’t you say that about her, goin’ ‘round spreadin’ rumors ‘bout my girl.”

You’d been furious. But you swallowed it down along with every other emotion you felt about Joan. You remember shaking your head. “Do what you want. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” he mirrored you, shaking his own head and huffing like a stubborn bull. When he stormed off, you’d only see him again in passing glances in town. Oh, did that hurt you. You should’ve kept your mouth shut. But you couldn’t bear the thought of such a good man as Billy being mistreated. Now he must’ve hated you for such a silly reason as talking badly about Joan.

He must’ve told Joan about it as well, because her eyes seemed locked in a perpetual glare at you. When her father called on yours again, she didn’t accompany him. Whatever. She wasn’t exactly a friend of yours, anyway. What you really mourned was the loss of Billy’s friendship. You considered it good as dead.

Though, when your father told you to put on a nice dress and come with him to a party Joan’s family was putting on, your hopes soared despite yourself. As you brushed a comb through your tresses, your mind dreamt up scenarios of running into Billy again. Maybe he’d forgive you for slandering Joan (even though it was for his own good!) and, in your wilder dreams, would confess that Joan was no good for him, and sweep you into his arms, kiss you like the fairytales…

You were being daft. Stupid. You put your hair into a neat bun, sighing at your reflection. Billy just couldn’t see that you were the one for him. Perhaps that was selfish, but lately you were finding that you were more selfish than you thought.

As soon as you arrived, a few daughters or other well-to-do ranchers and businessmen swarmed you, beckoning you to sit with them. You were actually grateful for the company. Though you were having a nice time, you didn’t see Billy anywhere. Your hopes stayed high, eyes darting around the room and training on any dark-haired man. None of them were him.

Joan, on the other hand, arrived soon after you. You couldn’t help staring at her as she kept to the edges of the room, talking to a girl you knew when you were young. You couldn’t decide whether to be disappointed that Billy wasn’t with her or sick that her other man must’ve been.

You forced yourself to avert your eyes when said man sauntered up to her, greeting her with a kiss to the cheek. Why did you do this to yourself? You shouldn’t have cared so much for a situation that— Billy had made very clear— didn’t involve you. But you cared for Billy. Even if he wanted nothing to do with you, you wouldn’t stop desperately wanting him to be happy.

You hesitantly sipped a mock-tail one of the girls had given you, pushing away thoughts of him, trying to have a good time. That was, until you felt a hand ghosting on your shoulder, and threw your head over it to see Billy, looming over you from behind the couch and smiling crookedly down at you. God, did he look handsome. He was wearing that navy hat, shading his eyes yet not hiding the beautiful azure of them. He was dressed well, too, not to the nines as you and practically everybody else in the room, but as good as an outlaw could get. A new navy button-up, a black vest and even a neck scarf. His clothes were only a ribbon, anyway, a neat little bow tying off the strikingly handsome man wearing them. Who, did you mention, was smiling at you for the first time in weeks?

“Hey. Long time no see.” Billy said it with a grin in his voice, so easily, like it was nothing. It was everything to you. You bit back a snarky Whose fault is that? In favor of smiling and nodding almost shyly. Words seemed impossible with how tight your chest was from happiness. You thought you caught him glancing you over quickly, your pretty dress and up-do. Billy threw you a little wink and nodded politely at the other girls around you. “Hope y’ladies don’t mind if I borrow her a sec?”

The girls nodded passionately, smiling and raising their brows at you in mixtures of second-hand excitement, congratulation and surprise. You set down your drink, excused yourself, and let Billy guide you to the porch. You gave Joan another look, grateful that she was busy.

“What is it?” You couldn’t help picking at your nails, pinching your brows. God, this was all so nerve wracking.

Billy stopped only a foot in front of you, his jaw tensing and his gaze flicking away for a brief moment. When those brilliant, gorgeous eyes settled on you, with so much intensity, you almost felt weak in the knees. “I wanted t’say m’sorry for bein’ so cold. It was petty of me. And wrong.”

Damnit. You wanted to be mad. You wanted to yell at him for treating you so badly for just looking out for him, but… you couldn’t. Damn him for being such a mature man. Looking up at his expression, his eyes, the set of his mouth, (you shouldn’t be looking there!) he was so sincere. He wasn’t staring at you expectantly, he wasn’t waiting for your forgiveness because he wasn’t apologizing to receive it— he was apologizing to apologize.

You weren’t too in love to be honest even with how hard your heart was thumping. You’d been waiting for so long for those words to slip from his lips, too long to let them pass by with a simple it’s okay. “It hurt. I never meant to upset you, Billy, I was just..”

Billy shook his head, reaching a gentle hand to your forearm before letting it slip just as fast, as if remembering something. “Y’didnt deserve that. Y’were just tryna help, I shoulda known that. I shoulda known you were just misled.”

You pressed your lips at that. Sure, you had your apology, but he still didn’t believe you. “I wasn’t misled.” You huffed, and Billy didn’t reply. His eyes brushed you up and down, but you didn’t lose become shy this time. “I’m serious. Joan isn’t good for you.”

Billy sighed your name, a bit exasperated but trying his very best to be polite. He shook his head, those baby blues bare and honest. “Why don’t you like her?” You opened your mouth to protest but he lifted a hand and huffed. “No, I can tell. Since the beginnin’ you haven’t liked her any further than you can throw her.”

“Because, Billy, she’s not an honest girl!” You scoffed, crossing your arms. Realizing you’d raised your voice, you took a breath and muttered a lame apology. “You barely know her, n’ you already trust her. You don’t have any reason to, if anything you have reason to hate her!”

Billy’s eyes were buggy, staring down at you in shock at this outburst of passion. But you wouldn’t give him a chance to reply. If anything, you stepped closer. He didn’t backpedal. “You deserve a girl who wouldn’t take advantage of you. She’s playing you, Billy, and I’m sorry for overstepping but I can’t stand by and let you devote yourself to somebody who won’t do the same!”

Billy turned his cheek a bit, eyeing you as if seeing something new. Something he didn’t exactly mistrust, but something so unbelievably foreign in you that he couldn’t help being skeptical if he was seeing it at all. Suddenly his gaze was so honest, so raw and searching you felt a bit self conscious, that gumption wearing off to fumes.

“I am the woman who wants you to win, and I’ve been waiting for you to love me.” You breathed, swallowing hard you wondering if you might’ve gone too far. You’d only just gotten Billy back a minute ago, and here you were jeopardizing the most important friendship you’ve ever had. “You belong with me.”

The friendship of the most important man in your life.

The man who was staring down at you, close as he could be without blatantly touching you, his brows furrowed and his eyes raw. opening his mouth to speak but being oh so cruelly cut off by a man barging outside.

“Charlie?” The name was put to the face as Billy eventually and reluctantly turned his head to him.

Charlie had a remorseful expression, beckoning Billy inside. “You’re gonna wanna see it f’yerself.” When Billy stepped inside, you trailed after him, expecting a commotion but not finding one. Just a beautiful, dark haired woman kissing a mediocre (to say the kindest) man.

“What the fuck?” Billy breathed, stomping closer and shoving Peña off Joan roughly, his nostrils flared. He looked to Joan with wide eyes, huffing, “Joan? Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?”

Now there was a commotion. Socialites stared and chattered, Joan desperately tried to explain a situation that didn’t need explanation. Much less such a feigned one. “Billy, he’s not— oh, it’s not what it looks like!”

Billy shook his head, rubbing his temple and throwing a look over his shoulder to you. Maybe he was expecting an I told you so, but you didn’t give him one. You frowned deeply, hoping that your eyes were enough of an apology for the time being.

If it wasn’t a scene a moment ago, it certainly was now. All the room’s eyes were on the three, and Billy must’ve known that, because he muttered something to Joan to be kept twixt them. Her face fell, and she reached out for him, but he was already storming to the door. Now it seemed to be Peña’s turn to be upset with Joan, but before you could see anything else your father grabbed your elbow and declared it was time to leave— A blessing or a curse, you were too confused to say.

But one thing that reared its ugly head through the blur was heartache. Heartache for Billy. You’d warned him, you had every right to feel righteous, but you loved the man too much for his pain to be anything but excruciating. Even if this opened the door for you, how could you be certain Billy wouldn’t close it for fear of another broken heart?

The next day, you returned to the field and the oak tree. Maybe you were expecting Billy to show up, because you didn’t bring your book. You simply tied your Appaloosa to the tree, sitting in the overgrown grass and looking out over the plains. They were dotted with wildflowers this time of spring, dappled yellows, purples and whites. It wasn’t long until you heard hoofbeats, as you expected to, making you quickly rise to your feet and dust off your riding pants. You picked against your cuticles as you watched Billy tie his quarter-horse to the tree with yours.

“I’m sorry about Joan.” You blurted the moment he came close, watching him adjust the brim of his hat. That easy smile he wore faltered.

“Not your fault, sweet. If anything it’s m’own fault for bein’ so dumb.” There went those brilliant blue eyes, flicking over you and making your belly erupt in butterflies. “You’ve been the one person on my side since the beginnin’. And I didn’t appreciate you.”

You shook your head passionately, pinching your brows and training your own eyes on your boots. You had to change the subject before your heart gave out. “You still love her, though?”

Billy shook his head and snorted. Actually snorted, as if anything about this was funny. You hadn’t realized he was so close until he used a bent finger to tilt your chin up. “Puppy love, m’ realizin’.”

If his hand were to drift to your neck he’d find your pulse frozen. That gentle set of his lips, the subtle draw of his draw brows, shaded by the brim of his hat— Oh, Christ. You were always comfortable around Billy. But something about the air here was charged. Your words on the porch rang in his head like the echo of a birdsong, he just couldn’t help confront them.

“But this ain’t that, is it?” Billy mumbled, as if the words were a secret twixt you two. Your eyes widened, you had to swallow down any rash words. Rash words like I love you. Your mind was swimming, until Billy’s hand moved to your rosy cheek. Something about the touch made everything still.

“No.” You admitted gently. That hat was casting too deep a shadow over his handsome face in the noon light, and you reached forward to tilt it upward. Much better. “It’s never been puppy love.”

The corner of Billy’s lips pulled a bit. Once again you’d disregarded just how close he was, because when his nose nudged yours, you sucked in a soft gasp that made his eyes flick up to yours. He made a move to back away, your anxiety jumping at even the slight movement, as if he’d run away and never come back. Your hand flew to the back of his neck, your lips crushing against his as you pulled him down to your level.

The kiss was not bruising. It was not demanding. His lips were just as lovely as you dreamt, slightly chapped and warm. This kiss as ardent and loving as you’d read in the fairytales. This kiss was honest.

So of course you went for more the moment he pulled away. You had nostrils for a reason— and Billy had no problem with kissing you until his chest was tight. By the time your lips disconnected, his hand was strong on the small of your back, the other threaded in your hair.

Billy let out the softest laugh after a moment, you couldn’t help breathlessly giggling. Here was everything you’d ever wanted, in your arms, pressing another kiss against the corner of your mouth and smiling broadly. You were the woman who loved him all along, and now he was the man who loved you just the same.

“What took you so damn long?” You couldn’t help jest, wrapping your arms around his neck (with only your toes on the earth, mind). Billy shook his head, that grin softening to a sweet smile that barely pulled his lips over his teeth.

“What, y’don’t like my timin’?” Billy squeezed his arms tighter around you at the sweet sound of your laugh.

You pressed another peck to his lips, unable to resist for a moment now that you’d gotten a taste. “No, not one bit.”

“When would’ve suited your schedule better, miss?” Billy cocked an eyebrow, nose nudging your cheekbone a bit. Oh, you could get used to this.

You pursed your lips in thought. “Last year.” You decided, making Billy’s grin grow impossibly until his eyes crinkled along with it. He hummed thoughtfully, lifting you up with the arm ‘round your back and giving you a little spin that drew sweet giggles from your lips. “That so, lil’ lady?”

Billy didn’t set you down without another, lingering yet chaste, kiss. “Better make up for m’mistakes, yeah?”

Idk how I feel abt this one but it cured my writers block so thank you for the ask!!!

Bonus points if you can clock the Fiona Apple lyric lol

[mayxo-hxh]

As autistic coded as Illumi is, he is also EXTREMELY Bpd coded. Here's a thread abt why that would be, from a person with bpd. 🧵

Everything about his character screams a person that feels so so much but forcefully tones his feelings down so hard to the point where they seem nonexistent.

On the exterior he seems like he couldn't care less about most things and is a very calm and controlled person. However, his emotions shine the brightest when the topic of interest is a person he cares about.

This is ESPECIALLY shown in the election arc where he reveals much of his emotions to the audience. He gets two whole bloodlust scenes this arc.

One with extreme anger

and one with extreme joy.

When Hisoka provoked him, it took absolutely zero transition for him to immediately spike his bloodlust and aura to GREAT amounts to the point of engulfing the entire MOUNTAIN and reaching Killua from SO far away.

And in the same exact second it happened, it ended just as quickly the moment he noticed Killua running away. That is a CLASSIC negative mood swing example if I've ever seen one. One extreme emotion in one second, gone in the other.

On the other hand, his second bloodlust had a small transition, one that still did not give you the expectation of what truly came after.

He is seen watching Killua on his phone and the moment Nanika healed gon, showing Killua can use her on command with no consequences and also showing her immense power, he was absolutely overjoyed. So much in fact that he exploded in maniac laughter and aura a second after merely giving it a small laugh.

We get a hint at his bloodlust incoming in that moment, but NEVER predict just how MUCH would actually come out. Classic euphoric mood swing number two.

When he encountera Killua with Hisoka in the background at the end, he is pretty much shown going through the five stages of grief in mere minutes the moment his own butlers turn on him and allow Nanika to come out.

denial, anger, depression...

bargaining.......

and finally, acceptance. acceptance that he was going to be traded by killua not only for a friend, but for the rest of the family's lives.

He was so very clearly unhappy about it at the beginning, yet came to acceptance in mere seconds the moment nanika came out. He bargained with himself, Killua shouldnt be able to wish twice, then accepted. even if he could, thats okay. go ahead, kill me!

and then theres also the way he just switches from a very :DDD to >:| mood in like one panel short hello he is so coded

Even more; Usually bpd is either caused through trauma or inherited. and you can definitely argue that illumi went through enough "training" for the former but. is his behavior not. familiar to yall. not at all???? im just saying......... I know someone else in the zoldyck family that has intense mood swings!

if there is one person in the family that shows their unfiltered emotions and switches from being calm to screaming in distress in a single second, its going to be this woman. she gave birth to a son thats a literal copy of her. she ctrl c'd and ctrl v'd.

and i dont exactly know what this next one has to do with the thread but why was bro normal for one second then turned into this i mean im not complaining hes still hot and ill claim him as my bpd son regardless

anyways yes this was the thread have fun with this interpretation slash analysis however u like 👍

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Livin' a dream (Rick Flag)

Pairing: Dad!Rick X Mom!Reader

Request: Your Rick story Drunk and Dreamin' Awwwww❤ Drunk Rick is so adorable🥺 Would you mind to do eventually a second part? Maybe with Harley (as Godmother?) or any other squad members?🥺 Dad!Rick would be sooo❤❤

Warnings: this one is literally fluff, some cursing, that's literally it

WC: 3.2k

A/N: sooo I got a lot of comments asking if I'd do a part 2 of drunk and dreamin. So at first instance I totally wasn't going to. But then after I thought about it I decided to do a part 2. And not only that, but Ill probably make this into a "series" and I use quotations because it wont be a series with a storyline per se. Itd be more of individual stories and dabbles within the same universe. Just if I ever feel like writing for Dad!Rick I already have that established. Or if anyone has a dad!rick request I'd probably do it in context of this universe. For now he's part two ft HarleyHere's drunk and dreamin in case you want to read the first part as well

Feedback and reblogs are highly appreciated!

Domesticity was a weird thing. Settling down, white picket fence, having a family, it just wasn't for you. I mean, you spent your teenage years stealing, in and out of juvie and trying to survive. When you got into adulthood that didn't really change. Instead of just pickpocketing people you did full on heists, armed robbery, and when got got caught you spent the rest of your twenties in and out of a prison, going on suicide missions, killing people under the command of a tyrant. By then you had started to like being threatened with getting your brains blown out every other minute if you refused to follow orders. Because truly, that had to be all there was going to be in your life.

So if someone had told you five years ago that you were going to be married to a special forces officer and commander of the suicide task force you were a part of, and that you were going to have a kid together, you would absolutely laugh in their face. It was ridiculous right? I mean the man had a stick so far up his ass you could see it when he yawned, and you were nothing but a lowlife killer with an explosive planted in the back of your head. Surely if you put two and two together, it was a recipe for disaster.

Well, disaster for whoever stood in your way anyway.

But that was all behind you now. Who would've thought that finding the love of your life and having a kid would change your way of seeing things. Violence and chaos was all you knew, now you just wanted peace and to be somewhere where your child wouldn't have to see the things you or Rick have seen. Even if that meant running away from just about everything you knew.

Sure, you had served your sentence, 5 years at Belle Reve and being in Task Force X did reduce your sentence. But really, would you truly ever be free? Especially when you and Rick were huge assets to the Task Force, Waller's best if you will. She wouldn't let either of you go that easy. So moving as far away from Gotham and Louisiana as possible probably was your best option.

As much as you liked the chaos, the violence, rain of bullets and all of it in between, you loved this life more.

"I can't believe this is where you've been hiding! You couldn't even tell me? That really hurts my feelings honey." Good old Harley was hot on your tail, as loud and as euphoric as ever. You honestly had no fucking idea how she found you. Last you heard she was in Gotham raising hell as she always did when she wasn't in prison. How she strayed so far away from home you had no idea. All you knew is that she found you, and she really really wanted to meet your baby girl.

"We couldn't tell anyone. It was a security thing. Rick insisted on it." You explained with a half shrug. I mean it was true. The minute Rick found out you were pregnant he did absolutely everything to get the explosive out of your head, and the minute he did, you were out of there. The only downside of moving halfway across the country was that you couldn't really tell anyone where you lived, which included your best friend. "But you still managed to find me, didnt you?"

"Well I had to meet baby Elena! When I heard Flag was having a kid I couldn't believe it. He doesn't strike me as the kids type." She argued, face scrunching up a bit at the thought, as if the idea still didn't quite make sense in her head, "actually you don't either. Are you two even fit to raise a child?"

You stopped fumbling inside your purse to look at her, if only you had a gun right now. You narrowed your eyes, glaring daggers in her direction before you went back to looking for your house keys inside your purse. You found them and unlocked the door to your house, heavily considering whether or not to let Harley in or if you should just shut the door in her face just for saying that.

"Real fucking funny Harls. You wanna meet my kid or not?" You looked over your shoulder, raising an eyebrow. She quickly nodded without missing a beat.

"Well duh!" She scoffed and barged right into your home with a pep to her step and giddy with excitement. You blinked a couple of times and slightly opened your mouth to question her, but what even was the point?

"No really…. Come right in, hun." You blew out a breath and shook your head, walking in yourself and shutting the door behind you.

You walked further into the house, finding Harley standing in the middle of a hall, not knowing where to go. You knew Rick was home, because you asked him to stay with Elena—your six month old daughter, while you went to the store to pick up some things. And you perfectly knew Rick's favourite spot to be with her.

The couch.

You could bet a million dollars he even had her dead asleep on his chest. You just knew it.

"Hey, where's— oh, my God!" You heard Harley squeal behind you when you both stepped into the living room. Yep, you knew it. The first thing you saw when you walked in was Rick in nothing but a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, dark blonde strands sticking in all kinds of directions, and mindlessly watching TV on the couch with, you guessed it, your baby girl peacefully asleep right on his chest.

Rick hadn't realized you were there until he heard Harley. His head quickly snapped in your direction, eyes wide and alert, he instantly sat up, holding Elena with one arm as if he was ready to get up and run. He never really lost that paranoia that someone might come in to make either of you go away. But when he realized it was just you and a very booming Harley, he relaxed, slouching back into his place as he looked down at Elena to make sure he hadn't disrupted her sleep. Fortunately he didn't. So he sighed softly, leaning down to press a small kiss to her head before letting her settle her head on his shoulder again.

If there was something you loved about your new life it definitely had to be this. Coming home to the sight of your breathtaking husband cradling your beautiful baby girl. You would never get tired of it.

"I swear to God if I got a dollar for everytime this girl fell asleep on you I could probably pay this damn house off." You scoffed quietly, feigning being offended by the fact that Elena always slept when she was with him, but she'd give you a hard time. Rick bit his lip, scrunching up his face a bit as to refrain himself from laughing. "I can never get her to nap. I don't know what she has with you."

"Maybe I'm just really damn good at getting people to do what I want them to. She didn't even cry. I just sat here, sat her on my lap, turned on the TV, and she just fell asleep. She's been asleep for like an hour now." He chuckled softly, holding Elena up with an arm wrapped around her small body and gently stroking the back of her head. "Also, can you tell me why the hell is Harley here? How did she even know we live here?"

You glanced at your friend, eyes big and lips pushed together into a 'told you so' expression and you shrugged, shaking your head as you walked to the couch, leaning down to press a light kiss to the back of Elena's head and then gave a chaste kiss to Rick, because if he didn't get a kiss too, then the boy got jealous.

"I don't even know. She just, y'know, appeared at the front door and waited for me to let her in. I didn't even want to ask how she found out." You explained with a soft sigh, cautiously flopping down beside Rick, leaning against his shoulder and smiled happily at your sleeping daughter.

She looked so peaceful, like there was nothing in this world that could ever hurt her. I mean, with Rick as her dad, she would always feel at peace and safe. You knew the moment he first saw her, he fell completely in love with her. Even now, six months later he loved that girl like crazy. And you know that he would protect her with his life. Before this, he had nothing but his job. He was a hero, the best special forces officer the military had to offer, the commander of an elite task force. He was all of that, but really, what else did he have? And when he met you, he realized there was more just death, guns and blood. He realized that he could have a reason to come back from a mission, that he could hold someone at night, that he could love someone like he loves you. And when Elena was born, well, you both became his absolute everything.

His girls meant the world to him, and if keeping you both safe meant that he had to leave everything he wanted to do with his life then he would, and he did. Just for you. Just so you could live the semi normal and happy life you always dreamed of having. And that meant everything to you.

Harley eventually skipped over, probably feeling left out and she smiled widely, "well I wanted to meet my goddaughter! I also got Elena something." She said excitedly, digging into the pocket of her jacket. Rick shared a look with you, eyebrows furrowed and he mouthed 'what the fuck?' But you didn't respond. You simply shrugged, getting distracted by Elena shifting on Rick's chest. You ran a finger over her pale cheeks and giggled softly when she scrunched up her face.

You took your attention away from her when you felt Rick turn his head to look down at you. You looked up to meet his eyes. They were always so full of love when they looked at you, like he was looking at the thing that meant most to him. One of them anyway. You couldn't help but smile, and he did the same.

"Hey lovebirds," You looked away from Rick when you heard Harley and turned your head to look at her. "I'm right here you two." She frowned and pouted.

"Sorry Harls." You giggled and nodded at her, "what did you steal this time?"

"Pff what? I didn't steal anything!" She defended herself, slightly jiggling something in her hand you couldn't quite see from your spot on the couch. You raised an eyebrow, sharing a look with Rick before you looked back at her. "Okay fine! Flag, don't look at me like that! It was just really pretty, it even has her initials on it."

Next thing you knew, Harley was handing you something, a silver bracelet with dangling charms on it. Your eyes widened at the sight, you knew Rick reacted too because you felt him sit up, cursing quietly when he felt Elena shift again. You both stared at the bracelet, noting the small red 'E' charm dangling along with red and black diamond charms much like the ones Harley had tattooed on her forearm. You were completely astonished and shocked. It was absolutely beautiful and you couldn't believe she would get that for your baby girl.

"Harley oh, my God," you exclaimed softly, eyeing the silver jewelry with a dumbfounded smile, "please tell me you didn't spend money on this. It looks really expensive."

"Oh God no, of course not." She answered a bit too quickly.

"Harley," Rick sighed heavily, looking up with a clearly unimpressed and disapproving look that made her shake her head quickly.

"I mean, yeah, of course I bought it. Relax Flag." She dragged out his name a bit and smiled innocently. Yeah he wasn't going to fight her about it.

"We really appreciate it Harls, it doesn't matter where it came from," you emphasized, slightly glaring at Rick and standing up, pulling your crazed friend into a tight hug. God you really miss her. "Thank you. I'm sure Elena will love to know her godmother gave her this."

"Yeah, thanks Harley." Rick added with a dry sigh, as monotone and as nonchalant as always. You wondered if he ever let his walls down around other people that weren't you. To say why you grew to love this man was a huge fucking mystery, it wasn't because of his total charisma and people skills that's for damn sure.

"I really hope that lil' pumpkin doesn't have your attitude when she's older. Poor girl already has to look like you." Harley scrunched up her face, and you had to cover your mouth with the back of your hand so you wouldn't burst out laughing.

"The hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing!" Harley defended and shrugged, slightly pointing to the sleeping child, who was nearly the exact copy of her dad. "I'm just saying she looks exactly like you. It's like God said hey, we need another Flag, but I'm just gonna make it a girl. It's like copy and paste."

"Oh, my God Harley." You couldn't hold it in, you snorted, slightly covering your face with your hand, completely missing the annoyed look on Rick's face, but you did catch him shushing you. "God really did say fuck you on this one. So I carried that girl for nine months, and I went through 12 plus hours of labor, plus other unenjoyable pregnancy shit just so she'd come out looking exactly like her dad. As if the world needed another Rick Flag but a girl version."

"And that is exactly why she falls asleep on me, but won't even sleep in her crib with you." Rick pointed out, clearly proud to say it, and when you turned to look at him, he had a huge smug smirk on his face.

"Literally fuck you."

"Yeah, love you too sweetheart."

~~~~~~~~~

Good lord having kids was hard. Having an infant was hard. And getting them to sleep was an absolute fucking nightmare.

But hey, in six months you've learned how to work with Elena, at least now you have managed to get hervto sleep without having to call Rick to come cradle her. You're actually really proud of that now. You can at least rub that in his face. It took a while, but after a little while of cradling her while rocking softly on a rocking chair and the use of her favourite blankie, when you looked down, she was dead asleep. She looked peaceful. You could probably watch her sleep forever, she looked like a princess. And that she was.

You sighed happily, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to her little forehand before you stood up and carefully set her down on her crib. You slightly scrunched up your face, hoping she wouldn't wake up from the small movements. She didn't. She was sound asleep, her little arms at her sides and little legs kicking a bit as she adjusted to being on her crib.

God this girl looked so much like Rick it wasn't even funny.

You smiled softly to yourself and shook your head as you turned on the little moon and stars mobile she had above her, knowing it usually soothed her in her sleep. And after taking one last look at your baby girl, you turned on the little lap beside her crib and turned off the lights on your way out of the room.

You let out a heavy breath, exhausted and ready to maybe get some sleep that night. Yawning softly and stretching your arms out as you walked, you went to your shared bedroom with Rick. You found him already in bed, the covers up to his waist, shirtless and sitting up against the headboard, probably watching TV until you got there so you both could try to sleep. When you closed the door behind you, he turned his head to look at you and smiled, inviting you into his arms without saying a word. You happily complied, already in your pajamas and ready to go to bed. You nearly jumped on the bed, giggling when you bounced and landed right on his lap.

"Hi there pretty boy." You giggled looking up at him as you sat up and got under the covers with him.

"Hi sweetheart," he chuckled, moving down to lay on his back and you instantly laid your head on his chest, body pressed against his side and legs tangled with his. "Did you get the little princess to sleep? You were there for a while."

"Mhm," you hummed softly, nuzzling into his chest, mindlessly tracing the tattoo he got under his collarbone not too long ago. The inked letters spelled Elena's name in neat cursive, and right under it was her birth date in Roman numerals. To say that you loved this tattoo was an absolute understatement, "you think you're the only one that has charms. You can't always have every girl wrapped around your finger."

"Well, I got you, didn't I?" He teased, muscular arm wrapping around you to pull you impossibly closer to him.

"Yeah, you had me falling head over heels for you." You hummed, chucking softly at the memory of just how stupidly in love you were with him when you met, "Rick?"

"Yeah baby?" He shifted a bit and looked down at you. You sighed softly, moving your head to look up at him, eyes big.

"Are you happy?" You swore you've never seen Rick's eyes get as wide as they did just then. His mouth opened and closed a couple of times, confusion flashing through his hazel eyes. He really wasn't sure what you were asking him. So before he asked you clarified, "are you happy, living like this, with me, with Elena. And yes, yes I know exactly what you're going to say, but I know I made you give up a lot. You joined the military cause you wanted to serve your country and be a hero, and I made you give all of that up. And I know you love me and Elena more than anything, but I just never knew if this is what you really wanted for your life."

"Y/N, baby I—" he took a pause, wetting his lips softly as if to regroup his thoughts in his head and he chuckled softly, running a hand through your hair as he held the back of your head, "I don't care about any of that. I don't care about the recognition, the task force or being a goddamn hero. All of that doesn't mean shit to me. You and Elena mean everything to me. I left the task force and decided to move away from all of that because I wanted all of us to be safe, I wanted us to be safe. And even if Elena hadn't come along when she did, I still would've made the same decision because I wanted to come home to you, and for that we both needed to get away. So to answer your question sweetheart, yes I am so fucking happy with you and our baby girl. I'm livin' a dream and I wouldn't change that for anything."

[seonghwanotes]

i don't even know your name | jung wooyoung

pairing: idol!wooyoung x fan!reader

genre: fluff, comedy?, cringe tbh

word count: 3.8k wtf

a/n: this isnt good im sorry, this is an old repost and maybe in the future, ill rewrite it? merged 2 parts together so 😃 PLS I HATE THIS KDJSNSBD

a new era, more promotions, more atinys joining the fandom and more amazing concerts. that was the flow for every comeback the boys have had and it was another night for another show in one of the beautiful cities out of millions scattered around the world. the feeling was no less euphoric, the adrenaline rush never left their system, keeping them energized no matter how tired they were.

they were living their dreams and they never wasted a single second of it.

but, their last show went differently for jung wooyoung. throughout all his years of performing, wooyoung never expected himself to fall into a trap where even he couldn’t find a way out. he supported his head on his palm as he watched every vehicle pass by his as yeosang was driving to the nearest mcdonalds. usually, wooyoung would be chatting away with him, turning the radio off to get yeosang’s attention but today, he remained silent and kept sighing.

“what’s with the sighing, woo?”

he shook his head and continued staring outside. yeosang didn’t pester him and tried to think of what happened earlier today that could have caused him to stay this silent. the concert was perfect too; there weren’t any problems that they faced today. did something happen to the fans in the crowd that he could have noticed? possibly.

before yeosang could question wooyoung, he spoke out. “did you notice anything when we performed mist?”

yeosang shook his head briefly, making wooyoung continue. “it’s just that, i saw this girl, i assume she’s an atiny cause she was holding the lightstick you know, and like, i don’t know.”

yeosang joked, “you actually like someone other than san now?”

“i think so.” wooyoung answered back with a serious tone, making yeosang bring the car to a stop. there wasn’t much traffic on the road so it was still safe but if the police were doing their rounds, they would definitely get a fine. “dude, if you’re gonna stop the car, at least stop at a place where we wouldn’t get fined.”

yeosang was still in shock. not at the fact that he answered back to his question, but at how he actually fell in love with someone. that too, an atiny. yeosang proceeded to park the car in front of a convenience store and placed the gear in p. “can you… elaborate more?”

“i don’t know. i just happened to see her while we were performing mist, like when i sang the chorus, i don’t know how but i saw her. she wasn’t even at the front row, she was more to like, the middle? she was dressed up quite casually, nothing fancy, oh my god, yeosang, i don’t know, it’s driving me crazy.” wooyoung explained, grunting in frustration.

yeosang stared at him in shock. was he for real? “wooyoung-ah, you’re not playing around right?”

“why would i be playing around?” wooyoung replied back, sounding annoyed. he huffed and crossed his arms, leaning back into his seat. “forget that i even told you about this, you’re no help.”

“no, it’s not that. i’m just genuinely surprised, you’ve never been like this before. i wonder what did you see in her to make you feel this way.” he murmured, shifting the gear back to drive and drove to mcdonalds.

“her eyes and her smile.” wooyoung replied back, his eyes fixed on the road. “they looked magical and i felt like i was home when i saw her smile. i swear i felt a connection, i still feel weird from making eye contact with her.”

yeosang hummed, “it’s okay woo, maybe she’ll be at the fan meet tomorrow. try your best finding her there.” wooyoung sat straight, his head snapped towards yeosang. “you’re right, we still have the fan meet.” he nodded, finally reaching mcdonalds and went into the drive thru section.

while yeosang ordered the food for the boys, wooyoung took out his phone and scrolled through their twitter. he saw that their concert was trending so he clicked on it and went through the tweets. it was mostly update accounts and fans tweeting about it, some fans posted pictures of themselves with the lightiny, some posted videos of the concert, some posted edits of the concert.

one particular picture grabbed his attention, it was a picture of ateez performing mist and the fan had managed to capture the picture from a perfect angle and didn’t miss any detail of the background and the members. wooyoung smiled and unconsciously liked the tweet. he looked at yeosang, who was paying for the food and grabbed several paper bags filled with food. wooyoung offered a hand and placed them at the backseat, “is that all?”

“yeah, we’re good to go.” yeosang told wooyoung, thanking the mcdonalds assistant before driving off. it was a quicker drive from mcdonalds since yeosang sped a little and they reached their residence in no time. they brought the bags of food inside, capturing everyone’s attention as they gathered around the dining table.

“where’s hongjoong hyung?” wooyoung asked, after noticing he wasn’t around.

“he’s on a call, i think his mum called.” seonghwa answered, biting a piece of the chicken as wooyoung nodded. he felt quite hopeless as his mind wandered on about the girl who made his night special but also made him question her existence. he walked away to his room upstairs before san called out, making him stop in his tracks. “young-ah, where are you going?”

“i’m going to bed first, i don’t feel hungry.” he replied, “you guys enjoy the food, okay? good night.”

the members greeted him good night and continued their late night snacking despite the fan meet they had the next day. wooyoung walked inside his room and plopped on his shared bed with yeosang. why did it feel like it was going to be a long ride if he was going to find her? he sighed and got in bed, closing his eyes in defeat.

he felt miserable for not knowing her name to the very least, all he remembers is the warm smile that made him feel like home and her eyes that reflected the stars that night. he fell asleep, with high hopes of meeting the girl that’s been on his mind the whole day.

***

you were still thrilled from last night's events; attending your first ateez concert, having wooyoung lock eyes with you only for you to stay silent while the girls beside you were freaking out on behalf of you and when their official twitter account liked your tweet. it did feel crazy and surreal when you made eye contact with wooyoung, you were convinced he wasn't looking at you but he had his gaze on you the entire time during mist.

you wanted to tell your friend about this but you didn't want her to think you were full of yourself and wanted attention so you remained silent. the two of you were heading to the fan meet venue that afternoon and you were feeling nervous, not because you were excited to meet them but you were afraid to face wooyoung.

what if it's all just an illusion?

the room was filled with fans of the group and everyone dressed up either a little fancy or a little too revealing. you felt like you were sticking out like a sore thumb among all the gorgeous and handsome atinys. the boys weren't here yet so you went to grab a seat, where the only available ones were at the back. it was definitely going to take you some time so you chilled at the back with your friend, talking about your plans for the weekend.

minutes passed by and the crowd started roaring into cheers, making you look at the front. ateez was here. they came out and waved at the fans, greeted and bowed. everyone clapped their hands and cheered for them before the fan meet started. you were distracted by their looks and their cute decorations around the table and stage, not realising that wooyoung and yeosang were searching for her among all the atinys.

wooyoung's heart was racing, he wanted to meet the girl of his dreams, you could say. his eyes hungrily searched around the crowd as he donned a stunning smile and listened to the atinys who spoke to him, thanked them for every gift they gave him and tried his best to not lose focus.

yeosang, on the other hand, was trying to help out his buddy by searching for the girl of his description although it was impossible to find her at this rate for the fact only wooyoung would know how she looks like.

wooyoung didn't miss a single atiny and made sure he looked at them in the eyes, just to recognise her once more as her appearance started to be hazy in his mind. but nothing worked. he was disappointed, eventually losing hope that he was never going to find her and he wanted to give up.

right until he glanced to his left, noticing the last atinys who were in line for the fan meet and that's when he saw her.

she was here all this while.

the fan that sat in front of wooyoung was chatting away to him, while he kept glancing over to his left, eager to talk to her and to ask for her name and anything that would ensure that they didn't lose touch.

yeosang, who sat next to him, gave him a slight nudge to knock him back into reality. he turned back to the fan and continued talking to her, hoping time would pass by fast so that he could talk to her.

after a few fans, it was finally her turn. it was no one other than you. wooyoung looked at you like his whole life depending on you, making you feel different inside. the two of you were caught up in a tangled web for a second as no one breathed a word.

you snapped out of your trance and bowed at him, "hi, it's nice to meet you."

wooyoung fell in love that very second. you were the epitome of perfection to him, he was mesmerised with your gentle smile and your soft eyes that made him melt, to hear those words leave your lips, it sounded like music to his ears.

he didn't say anything when you spoke, his face was just in a state of shock and confusion, making you wonder if you uttered something wrongly. you felt uneasy for a second, so you looked at yeosang for help as he was watching the two of you. he caught on to your message and nudged him once again before he spoke to the girl in front of him.

wooyoung didn't say anything but he just looked down at your hands and sighed. even your hands were pretty, you didn't lack in anything at all.

"are you okay, woo?" you asked, bending down to see his face.

"huh?" he spoke, looking at you. "yes, yeah, i'm good."

"okay, well, you don't look so good," you laughed, making him shoot you a bright smile, squinting his eyes in the process. god, he was beautiful. before you were about to leave, you reached for your gift inside your bag and took it out.

you pushed the tiny box to him, "i got this for you. i'm not sure if you would like them but when i was buying a pair for myself, i saw this and i just thought "wooyoung would look stunning in them." so i just got this. who would have thought i would actually have the chance to give it to you?"

wooyoung took the box you gave him and he thanked you, opening the box. it had a pair of earrings in them, they were sparkling as the light from the ceiling reflected on them. it was definitely something of wooyoung's taste and he loved it. "thank you, this is really pretty."

"you're welcome, i hope it would go well with any outfit. i didn't know what to get for you, so i'm sorry." you apologised, adding a giggle which made wooyoung's heart flutter.

before the awkward silence could continue, time was up and you had to leave. wooyoung instantly went into panic mode as he didn't speak to you as much. "wait."

you looked up at him, with a confused look. "yeah?"

"can we take a picture together?" he asked you, taking his phone out.

your cheeks flushed a bright red shade, making you laugh once again at his odd request. "i'm supposed to be asking that, this is weird."

wooyoung laughed at his silly request and insisted on taking a picture with you. surreal wasn't even the word you could use to describe the situation you were in right now, how were you even lucky enough to take a picture with wooyoung?

the two of you took a picture together and it happened too quickly that you couldn't see how you looked. you frowned as you had to leave, the guard was rushing you to exit as time was up. "ahh, i hope i don't look bad there." you muttered, making wooyoung hush you up.

"no such thing, you're beautiful. any picture would look better with you in it." he said, making you stop breathing for a second. you were about to ask him for the picture since it was in his phone but the guards ushered you out.

you felt frustrated that you didn't get the picture from him, it wasn't like he could do anything with that picture but at least you could have it as your wallpaper. you did feel sad but you were satisfied with what had happened that day.

wooyoung didn't hesitate and posted the picture along with the gift you gave him on twitter. your phone was buzzing like crazy, fans found your twitter within seconds but your account was private so it was still fine but you were getting tagged non stop.

"wow, this man is crazy." you told yourself when you saw the tweet. his caption made your heart stop beating for a second, it said 'found my destiny through the uneasy mist~ thank you for today, atinys!'

jung wooyoung called you his destiny and it freaked you out. what did you want to do next? you went to the public bus stop and took a bus back home while you were still processing the whole incident.

back at the venue, wooyoung was thrilled that he found you and managed to get a picture of you. he didn't manage to get your social media but he was beyond happy that he got a picture with the girl of his dreams; his destiny.

yeosang approached him and gave him a pat on the shoulders, watching him being mesmerised over the picture. "so, what's her name?"

wooyoung gasped, dropping his phone on the clothed floor, saving his phone from cracks. he looked at yeosang and groaned. yeosang was confused, "why? what's wrong?"

wooyoung was back to his frustrated state as he told yeosang, "i didn't ask for her name."

hence, he was back to square one. searching for you, while all he had was your picture, your gift and the endearing smile that he would never forget.

---

the whole group was annoyed and frustrated with wooyoung as he forgot to ask for your name and he was complaining about it non-stop after the fan meet. it was getting on everyone’s nerves but no one bothered telling him to shut up knowing how he would react back. seonghwa was patient enough to lend him his ears and hear him out while thinking of what to tell him so that he’ll calm down.

but he had no luck finding you after that.

you, on the other hand, took the matter lightly but still felt appreciated by wooyoung although that was the first time you've met him and he was already head over heels with you. you dismissed the thought of wooyoung lingering in your head everyday, making you wonder if you should take a break from social media as you were always thinking of him everywhere you went. it started to freak you out a little, at times making you wish you didn't attend the fan meet.

your short trip was happening over the weekend and you didn't have much to do so you decided to leave a day earlier. you got your stuff packed and you booked the last flight to seoul which was around 11.00p.m.. you had a 2 week long semester break and you cancelled all your plans just to travel alone to give yourself a break.

you walked into the airport, which was almost vacant due to the time, staffs were prepared to leave after completing their morning and afternoon shifts while some staffs rolled in for the night shift. it was a chilly night, you just had your sweatpants and a hoodie on which provided you with enough warmth to mask the coldness.

sleep was all you wanted that night as you barely got any from doing your work and decided to leave early, making you wish you stuck with your original plan. you pulled your suitcase slowly, eyes fixated on the floor while you walked. not paying attention to your path, you accidentally bumped into a person and their things fell onto the floor.

guilt washing over you, you were knocked out of your sleepy state when the person hissed at you and cursed. you bent down, offering to help him out as his stuff fell out. “can you please pay attention if you're walking next time?”

you mumbled an apology while you gathered his things and passed it to him. you were about to pick up the last item and it struck you that the box looked somewhat familiar. almost all too familiar. you shot up, wanting to hand him the box but you stopped when you saw his face.

a face that you were familiar with when he wore makeup but he was barefaced this time yet he was no less attractive. you felt your heart tug to see him once again, easing your worries over him.

you were eye to eye with jung wooyoung once again.

when he saw you, he regretted yelling at you. it was obvious that you were taken aback by the person instead of his words, you instantly stood straight and bowed at him out of respect. wooyoung repeated the same and the two of you were quiet once again. you looked at your hands, seeing that you still held the box and you passed it to wooyoung.

“oh, um, i think this is yours.” you muttered. he took the box and thanked you, before running a hand through his hair.

“sorry, i didn’t know it was you. what brings you here?” he asked you, making your heart skip. he recognised you?

pointing a finger at yourself, you asked, “you know me?”

he nodded, pushing his glasses above with his index finger. “yeah, we took a picture that day, didn’t we? and you gave me this.” he stated, pointing to his ear where he wore the earring. you were dumbfounded, he actually wore it and he remembered you. you felt your cheeks heating up and wooyoung noticed that, making him blush as well.

“i’m going to seoul for the weekend, maybe spend a longer time there.” you answered his previous question. he nodded, looking down at his feet. it was funny, how both of you were so quiet yet he didn’t leave. not realising time was going by, you heard another familiar voice echo in the airport, making both of you turn your heads to the direction the voice came from.

the rest of ateez had their arms crossed, looking at wooyoung as they waited for him to join them so that they could fly to their next destination. they surely didn’t want to rush him to end his conversation otherwise they would have to deal with his annoying rave. but, they had no choice as they were about to miss their flight.

your heart sank knowing that wooyoung had to leave and wooyoung felt disappointed as well. not wanting to make the same mistake again, he looked at you with hopeful eyes. “hey, um, we should definitely catch up some other time, if you don’t mind, of course. are you up for some coffee or stuff like that?” he trailed off.

you nodded, yearning to see him again someday. “yeah, of course. do we exchange numbers or social media?” you asked, wanting to keep this lowkey without involving kq into it. he thought for a brief second and asked for your phone, which you gave without hesitation once again. he typed in his number and saved it as ATEEZ Wooyoung, making you giggle.

“jung wooyoung!” you heard a member yell, telling him to hurry up.

he got anxious and thanked you for the time you spared before he ran off. you felt a little funny on the inside, jung wooyoung of ateez wanted a picture with you and gave you his number. it was adorable of him to do so, but your time with him for the day was over in a glimpse again.

when wooyoung went to his group, they were all eager to know what happened. yeosang, without missing a second, asked, “what’s her name?”

“shit! i forgot!” he cursed, covering his mouth right away. his manager told them to hurry up and the boys started walking off, while yeosang waited for wooyoung to do something. san looked at wooyoung, “wooyoung-ah, there’s no time left. it’s either you don’t ask for her name or you yell right now.”

he sighed and nodded. without hesitation, wooyoung looked at you and yelled.

“HEY!”

there was almost no one at the departure hall but his voice was loud enough to scare a sleeping bug. you looked up and saw him waving hysterically at you. being clueless, you waved back as your heart did things to you.

“what’s your name?” he yelled. you didn’t want to yell it back, considering that some people were around so you decided to text him instead, swiping to your messaging app and you typed a quick text to him.

wooyoung’s phone ringed and he quickly whipped it out, seeing a text from a new number. he tapped on his notification and to his relief, your name popped up on the screen. “y/n. wow, y/n.” he breathed out.

“okay! thank you, y/n! i’ll text you soon! see you later!” he yelled back, his voice echoing through the airport.

you nodded and waved at home, watching him disappear as he walked away. his heart was racing and he ran to catch up with his members, boarding the plane and sitting at his assigned seat. san who was seated next to him, tapped his thigh, “so, did you ask for her name?”

he nodded, a smile never leaving his face. he leaned back into his seat and let out a deep breath. “a beautiful name for a beautiful person with a kind soul, y/n.”

[gael-hightower]

Location: The Reach, Highgarden Set during the four-month time jump Closed starter for @serafinamerryweather​

The time at the North had been an experience that everyone wanted to leave behind; learn to cope with the aftermath of murders, attacks, kidnappings and illness... perhaps none wished to find a new sense of normalcy, of familiarity after it all than House Merryweather. Gael had inevitably become much too concerned about Sera when he learned she’d gotten ill, and his worry only multiplied exponentially when her sister’s health decreased so rapidly that it all ended in the family having to bury one of their own. Any toll Serafina’s body might have endured during her sick days surely felt small when compared to the unspeakable pain of losing one so dear.

Coming back to the Reach didn’t mean it was all left behind, though, that the shadow of the events at the North could be simply ignored. He noticed that more so in Highgarden than he did back at home, where everything was a euphoric rush to organize the upcoming wedding of his Garland and Lady Lefford. The Tyrell’s home was different. People from all across the Reach gathered here for politics, people that had suffered in different ways in the cold, northern lands; people who carried themselves with veiled composure but were still haunted in different ways. Gael had no real place there, other than tagging along with Garland to escape their father’s disdain and disappointed glances with the excuse of learning his brother's work. It was also an excuse to see more of Serafina.

Perhaps he would be scolded for daring to seek out the lady during these woeful times; a time in which the Merryweather still mourned their loss and would probably want to do so in private. However, the thought of letting someone so dear to him as Sera go through such a hard time without the knowledge that she had a friend to lean on was unthinkable. So the youngest of the Hightower lords paced a bit in the hallway leading to Serafina’s quarters, debating on how to go about his visit. For someone so skilled in the art of weaving words on parchment, Gael was finding it hard to think of what to say to his friend now. Sending letters offering his condolences wasn’t the same as facing her with the knowledge that nothing he could say would make anything better, after all.

In the end, he simply opted for sincerity, even if he didn’t know how to make himself sound eloquent or convey any beautiful words. Ultimately, there was no beauty to mourning or the pain of a broken heart after death took someone from you. Gael stopped his overthinking and finally knocked on Serafina’s door. He stood there, waiting for the lady to make up her mind on whether or not she wanted to open. When she did, the lord’s expression softened and he greeted her with raw empathy in his eyes. “Hi Sera,” he said in a low voice, and without a word reached for her hand.

[perfectzablog]

To Boost Mental Health, Try Team Sports or Group Exercise

Ryan “China” McCarney has played sports his entire life, but sometimes he has to force himself to show up on the field to play pick-up soccer with his friends.

“I’m dreading and I’m anticipating the worst. But I do it anyway. And then, it’s a euphoric sensation when you’re done with it because you end up having a great time,” says McCarney.

McCarney was just 22 when he had his first panic attack. As a college and professional baseball player, he says getting help was stigmatized. It took him six years to get professional support. He still struggles with depression and social anxiety, but says exercising helps him — especially when it’s with his teammates.

Research shows exercise can ease things like panic attacks or mood and sleep disorders, and a recent study in the journal, Lancet Psychiatry, found that popular team sports may have a slight edge over the other forms of physical activity.

The researchers analyzed CDC survey data from 1.2 million adults and found — across age, gender, education status and income — people who exercised reported fewer days of bad mental health than those who didn’t. And those who played team sports reported the fewest.

One of the study’s authors, Adam Chekroud, an assistant adjunct professor at Yale’s School of Medicine, thinks team activity could add another layer of relief for sufferers of mental illness.

He says there are biological, cognitive and social aspects to mental illness.

“Some sports might just be hitting on more of those elements than other sports,” he says. “If you just run on a treadmill for example, it’s clear that you’re getting that biological stimulation. But perhaps there are other elements of depression that you’re not going to be tapping into.”

Now, this study only shows an association between group exercise and improved mental health, and can’t prove that the one causes the other. But, given what is known about depression in particular, it adds up, says Jack Raglin, a professor in the department of kinesiology in the School of Public Health at Indiana University, Bloomington.

People who are depressed often isolate themselves, he says, so exercising in a group setting, “can help alleviate symptoms and deal with this very pernicious symptom of depression.”

Group exercise or team sports might also have an edge over other forms of exercise because they add an element of accountability, says Raglin. He did a study finding that couples who started an exercise program together had a lower dropout rate than those who started one on their own.

The study showed that “very simple forms of social support can be beneficial,” he says.

Scientists don’t know the exact mechanism that makes exercise elevate mood and decrease anxiety, but there is a body of research to show that it does work on the short and long term.

“If you conceptualize exercise as a pill it means, well it’s a rather small pill and easy to take and easy to tolerate,” says Raglin.

One limitation of the Lancet Psychiatry study is the data is based on patients self-reporting their symptoms. Dr. Antonia Baum, a psychiatrist and the past president of the International Society for Sports Psychiatry says patients don’t always give an accurate picture of their mental health. She says the study is an important step in this research field, but the conclusions shouldn’t be taken as scientific gospel.

“We are animals. We are meant to move and if we don’t, a lot of systems slow down, including our mood and cognition,” says Baum. “So it makes intuitive sense that exercise is beneficial, but it’s nice to try to start to wrap our arms around being able to quantify and qualify that in some ways.”

Baum says she works with each of her patients to incorporate exercise into their lives. And she says this study will be a good jumping off point for more research on team sports and mental illness.

But, Baum and other researchers say getting someone who is depressed to start exercising is easier said than done.

“It’s all well and good to conclude that exercise whether it’s done as a solo or a group pursuit is beneficial, but to get patients to do it is another matter and when you have a depressed patient motivation is often lacking,” she says.

Chekroud says getting patients in general to stick to any kind of therapy is challenging.

“It’s not just exercises that people stop doing, they also stop taking medications. They stopped showing up for therapy,” he says. “Adherence is a big problem in health care right now,”

He says the study’s findings could lead to more tools to help people reduce the overall burden of mental illness, now the leading contributor to the global burden of disability.

“The field is really crying out for things that we can do to help people with mental health issues,” says Chekroud.

For McCarney, team sports have helped him get a handle on his symptoms, he says. Before social gatherings, he often feels claustrophobic and panicked, but when he works through the anxiety and gets onto the field, he says it’s always worth it.

“It just gets you around people which I think is another huge thing when you’re trying to maybe break out of a depressive cycle,” he says.

How to get started

For some people, the idea of joining a team or any kind of group fitness activity is terrifying. Here are a few tips for getting started.

Find a sports ambassador. Raglin recommends finding a “sports ambassador,” a friend who can connect you with a group sport or activity. The friend can get you up to speed on the sport and what’s expected of you. Team sports may feel like a leap of faith, says Baum. But, she says the rewards are worth it. “It’s like playing in an orchestra — the sum being greater than the parts — truly thrilling when it all comes together,” she says.

Match your skill level. It’s not hard to find amateur sports teams to join, on sites like meetup.com. A lot of workplaces also have team sport activities, but Raglin says you make sure the skill level is right for you. You’re more likely to have a good experience and want to go back. “There is nothing worse than being on a team where the skill or intensity of the players is way above or below your own level or the level of competition you were looking for,” Raglin says.

Join a run or bike club. If you’re not into team games, go to your local run shop or bike shop to find run communities, bike clubs or community rides to join. Raglin recommends the November Project, which is a free fitness program with chapters in major cities around the world that hosts workouts.

Put money on the line. If you really aren’t into team activities, Baum says getting a personal trainer or signing up for a gym can “help add a social element, and that all important accountability.”

Try the obvious thing first. Baum says to look at the activities you’ve done throughout your life and think about which ones worked best for you. She says she sometimes takes her patients running or walking with her for a therapy session to start modeling the types of exercises that could work for them.

Sasa Woodruff is a freelance radio reporter and producer based in Los Angeles.

Copyright 2018 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

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