#if she’s drowning toss her barbed wire and she’ll grab hold if it means you’ll pull her out of the water. you know. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

quietwingsinthesky · 2 months ago

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millie isn’t even still alive cause anyone ever brought her back. she just lives and lives and lives. she’s lucky. she’s good at her job. she has the last minute miracles, but never the ones that need to reach far beyond the grave, just the ones that pull your guts back in where they should be.

what’s dead should stay dead. she knows sam and dean would put her on the pyre and move on. she knows it. she knows it. (she’s not giving them a chance to prove her wrong.)

#spn oc #i think millie being alive is a horror story of its own. sam and dean can’t stop dying but she can’t stop living.#not with the reckless thrill of someone who knows they’ll go on forever but with her fingers wrapped around the sharp edge of her life and #clinging on until it cuts them down to bone.#i think it terrifies her that she might die and it won’t matter enough to end the world over.#i think she ripped gabriel’s corpse apart and preserved what she could because from her point of view. it didn’t matter what he’d done.#and like we know that’s wrong. we know gabriel’s death mattered on the point of getting through to lucifer enough that he contemplated #leaving the chessboard. but millie doesn’t. she just knows gabriel died and she wanted him to save himself. god she wanted him to save #himself. dean might have wanted him to stand up and be a hero but millie wanted an alive coward over a martyr.#she’s selfish like that. she really is. but he died. and it didn’t matter.#and that’s what she’s scared of. she won’t matter and she won’t come back and that’s it. show’s over.#if she’s drowning toss her barbed wire and she’ll grab hold if it means you’ll pull her out of the water. you know.

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