#if she GETS us exterminated then we're GETTING exterminated and you'll say please and thank you. get with the program

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

dan, sensibly when faced with a dalek: um, running?? mayhaps?? yaz, Hitting Him: do NOT embarass me rn she barely let me keep you

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Charlie: "So! How DID talking with Carmilla go?"

Vaggie: "Uhh..."

Charlie: (laughs) HA! Yeah- the giant weapons delivery kinda gives me an idea it went preeeetty good, but was it nice? Did you have fun? Did you find out how angels die? Did you two have TEA??"

Vaggie: "It was nice I had fun I know how angels die and no there wasn't any tea."

Charlie: "None? Phooey."

Vaggie: "Did you have any uh, tea in... Cannibal Town?"

Charlie: "None! No finger foods either! They were only a snack for the eyes- you can kiss me and double check, if you want to~"

Vaggie: "Tempting." (chuckles) "And distracting. Let's cover the angel killing stuff first, okay babe?"

Charlie: (sigh) "If we HAVE to..."

Vaggie: "I'll make it quick. You know Carmine's fancy dance slippers?"

Charlie: "Shiny!"

Vaggie: "Made from heavenly steel, turns out."

Charlie: "Oooooh!"

Vaggie: "She used them to kick the head off an Exorcist, last extermination day."

Charlie: "Oh wow. NOT the scenario I was expecting."

Vaggie: "Yeah, she told me about it while kicking me in the face with them-"

Charlie: "SHE WHAT"

Vaggie: "-and even when she explained the whole 'trying to protect her daughters' thing, internally I was still like, dancing someone to death is one of least practical ways of killing-"

Charlie: "She kicked you in the head with her angel killing slippers?!?"

Vaggie: "-long fight scene cut short, she makes it work. But I'm still sticking with my spear for the battle."

Charlie: "VAGGIE!!!"

Vaggie: "I don't care what Carmine or anyone else says. Spears are-"

Charlie: "SHE COULD'VE KILLED YOU!"

Vaggie: "...I know? That's why you asked me to talk with her?"

Charlie: "......."

Charlie: "I think. I'm gonna be sick."

Vaggie: "Aw babe." (brushed back charlie's bangs) "Cannibal Town finger foods finally catching up with you?"

Charlie: "No. Yes. They're not helping but it's more of a 'if my girlfriend had gotten killed, where would the finger of blame be pointed at' kinda thing."

Vaggie: "Sweetie no..."

Charlie: "Sweetie YES. I sent you there."

Vaggie: "And if Carmine had gotten my head, it would've been my fault for being so out of practice and shit at fighting."

Charlie: "UGH."

Vaggie: "Thanks for that, by the way."

Charlie: "What? For WHAT? Saying 'oh hey Vaggie guess what you can die!' and sending you to the Overlord who can kill you????"

Vaggie: "For keeping me out of practice at fighting."

Vaggie: (smooches gf)

Vaggie: "I like kissing you way better, honestly."

Charlie: "... well... well maybe you could still use some practice."

Vaggie: "With the kissing?"

Charlie: "Both. Kissing and fighting. I want you alive at the end of the battle so we can do more smooching afterwards. Okay?"

Vaggie: "Okay."

Charlie: "You'll get better at the fighting again- no more getting hit in the head with heavenly steel?"

Vaggie: "I'll do some more sparring with Carmine. No more heavenly steel headshots."

Charlie: "You promise?"

Vaggie: (smiling) "I promise."

-after the battle-

Charlie: "Mm. Hmm?" (pausing mid kiss) "I think one of your teeth are loose?" (glowering) "Vaggie. Did you get hit."

Vaggie: (groaning) "Table. Head slam. Lute."

Charlie: "Fuck that bitch."

Vaggie: "If you mean fuck her up, then yeah, I tried."

Charlie: "Heheh. I saw her afterwards. I'd say you did pretty good." (kiss again) "Dang it, yep- It's your upper right incisor." (pouts) "Boo. I liked that one a lot."

Vaggie: "If it falls out you can have it."

Charlie: "Really!?"

Vaggie: "If it falls out while we're kissing, please don't swallow it."

Charlie: "I guess we COULD just stop kissing for a sec to actually check on the whole loose tooth situation."

Chaggie: "....."

Vaggie: "Or, you could kiss-"

Charlie: "OR I COULD KISS IT BETTER!!!"

Chaggie: (smooching resumes)

[chaggie-supporter]

SUNDAY SPECIAL:

○|PT.7: SPEAR TRAINING|○

Angel has been quite quiet towards me today, and husk keeps shooting me glances from the bar.

Alastors gone, what a surprise. He just kind of comes and goes whenever he pleases. Pentious is also away somewhere with the eggs I presume. Charlie is bouncing around like a hyper bunny, and Vaggie.. has left her spear on its own. That's a first. Isn't her whole thing not trusting people? I wonder if she'd teach me how to use it.

"Charlie, does Vaggie know she left her spear here?" I call over to her. She stops what she's doing and glances between me and the spear.

"Oh, I don't think so.. maybe you should go give it back to her!"

"Okay, well, where is she?" I ask.

"Well, right now, normally she's.." she stops to think for a moment. "Out on a walk." Great. I have to wait until she returns.

"Do you think maybe.. she'd teach me how to use it?" I ask, hopeful. Charlue looks at me in contemplation.

"Well.. maybe? But I wouldn't get your hopes up, Alex." Damn it. If Mrs happy-go-lucky is having doubts, it's probably a no. Nonetheless, I wait on vaggie to come back.

When she returns, I bounce to my feet and bring her the spear.

"Hey Vaggie, you left your spear here." I hold it out to her, and she snatches it from my hand.

"Thanks." She says quickly and bluntly.

"So anyways, I was wondering if -"

I start, but she cuts me off.

"No."

"Oh, come on! You didn't even hear me out!" I protest.

"Fine, what is it?" She says with a sigh.

"I was wondering if you could teach me how to use a spear?" I ask, still hopeful.

"Hmm.. no." She replies.

"What? Please! Come on, Vaggie." She looks at me for a minute, then looks at Charlie. She then sighs and says reluctantly, "Fine, I guess I can teach you a bit."

"YES- or I mean, thank you." I say, glad that she did agree, even if it took a bit of convincing. She sighed again, then gestured for me to follow her as she began walking, so of course I followed. We walked to a door at the back of the hotel, which, when opened, leads to a small outside area. She grabbed a long wooden pole and handed it to me.

"I'm not going to let you use a real spear, in fear you'll cut off my head or something, because it's made of angelic steel." She explains.

"What's angelic steel?" I asked.

"Oh, it's used to make weapons for angels." She says like it's the most obvious think in the world.

"What? Why do angels need weapons?" I asked in shock.

"During the extermination? Or are you too stupid to know what that is either?" She asks.

"No! What's an extermination?"

"Extermination is when, for 24 hours every six months, angels come down and kill every sinner they can within the time period. These types of angels are known as Exorcists, and they use weapons like these" she points to her spear.

I don't know what to think, but I must look pretty horrified, because Vaggie asks, "what?"

"What? What! You just told me that angels are going to come and kill us! Why? Wh- why do you have one of their weapons?!" I nearly yell

"Uhh.. I just found it!" She rushes out.

"Uh huh, yeah, sure. Why do you actually have it?" I ask sceptically.

"I'm serious! I just found it!" She insists. I narrow my eyes at her. I don't believe that.

"..sure, okay, let's pretend I belive that. So how do you know when an extermination is going to happen?" Us my next question.

"Oh. There's a count down on the giant-ass clock behind us." Oh, so that's what it's counting down to.

"Right, I wondered why it had a count down! 108, isn't that like, in a couple of months?" I ask.

"Yeah, it is. That's why Charlie opened the hotel. To redeem sinners, so they don't have to be killed." She responds.

"Oh! Alastor said on the flyer it was because-" I start, but she cuts off, like earlier.

"Ah ah, we know what Alastor wrote on the flyer, and I'm not happy at him for it."

"Oh, right." I respond, before looking back to the clocktower for a moment. That's really cruel, to come down and kill sinners. I mean, we're already suffering. Surely that's enough.

"So.. should we actually start training, or are we going to stand here like idiots?" Vaggie asks, reading the silence I was yet to notice even formed. I turn back 5o look at her.

"Yeah.. i suppose we should.." I say, but something about my face must look wrong, because she stands there for a minute, before patting my back, and saying "maybe we should continue this a different day, yeah?"

"Yeah.. maybe we should.." I say, and we head back inside. As soon as we re-enter, Charlie sprints up to us.

"That was quick? How did it go? Was it fun? Was it-" jesus, Vaggie has a knack for cutting people off.

"Charlie, calm yourself down, and no, we didn't actually do anything.. Alex found out what an extermination is." Vaggie says.

"What? Oh." Is all Charlie can really say before going silent.

"Yeah, it's cruel to say the least." I say. "I mean, why kill us, when we're already suffering?"

"Yeah, I know. I don't like it either. That's what this place is for! To get less sinners killed and more into heaven!" Charlie says. We say a couple more words, before I dismiss myself to my room to lie alone with my thoughts. Why would they send angels down to kill us? What's the point? To add fear onto the top of the tower of suffering we already have? To remind us who's superior? It's cruel. Isnt their whole thing to be kind to everyone, even to the evil and cruel?

And why does Vaggie have ine of their weapons? Because I know for a fact, she didn't just 'find it.' It must go deeper than that, bit how? Where? Did she kill an angel? Something is off about her.

There are so many unanswered questions, that I assume Charlie, as the princess of this damned place, might know the answer to. I consider going back down to ask her a couple of times, but I ultimately decide not to, and drift into a light sleep, actually dreaming this time.

[alvacchi]

Heyo! It's been a while since I took on a scenario request! Sorry about that guys! I haven't been feeling up to them.

I almost lost this ask but I managed to screenshot O.o;

I may have claimed the crack ship dead but that doesn't mean we can't have some fun with it~

((Also, just want to point out that nothing really happens here.))

Enjoy some Norman and Aishe interactions!

[Spoilers up to Ch 135!]

---

SCENARIO: Bath

[Back in TPN Episode 10, Norman prepares his departure...]

Norman: [grabs Emma's hair] It'll be okay. Don't ever give up.

Emma: [gives a hoarse reply] Mm...

Isabella: Let's go Norman.

[Isabella and Norman start to leave.]

Norman: [looks at his right hand] 'I will never wash this hand again.'

[Later in the Paradise Hideout]

Vincent: Boss, I've noticed you never washed your right hand. Why is that?

Norman: Watching me like a hawk I see.

Vincent: I believe owl would be more appropriate in this case. And you haven't answered my question.

Norman: I just don't want to. Got a problem?

Vincent: Yes. It's bad if you don't take care of your hygiene. You could get sick.

Norman: It's not like I can wash away all I've done. I'm already tainted.

Vincent: Still. Please wash your hands boss. Or better yet, go take a bath since you've been neglecting that too.

Norman: No.

Vincent: I see. You leave me no choice. [Snaps fingers]

Norman: ?

[Cicero and Barbara come up from behind Norman and each grabs one of his arms and holds him up.]

Vincent: Cicero. Barbara. Please help out for the boss's sake.

Cicero & Barbara: Roger!

Norman: Wait what are you guys doing?!

[They carry him over to a bathtub and just throw him in there.]

Barbara: Oh wait we have to take off his clothes right? It's been so long since we ourselves had a proper bath.

Norman: This is sexual harassment! Do you guys have no sense of shame???

Barbara: Huh? What's so shameful about washing you?

Norman: YOU'RE A GIRL!

Barbara: And?

Norman: [covers his face with his hands] ....Please don't make me explain.

Barbara: Hm if you have a problem with us, then I'll be right back! Cicero, make sure the boss doesn't run away! [She runs out of the room.]

Cicero: Okay!

Norman: Besides, it's just my hand that's concerning right? I wouldn't say I'm dirty. Why am I taking a bath?

Cicero: It's the best way to clean yourself! Better safe than sorry! You probably got some stains from those demons we killed.

Norman: ...

Barbara: I'm back! [Pulls Aishe in front of her] Aishe will take care of you!

Norman: What! That doesn't solve the problem! I can just take a bath on my own!

Barbara: Isn't it fine! She can't talk our language so you don't have to worry about her saying anything! Plus, we need someone to watch over you for your own good! You guys keep staring at each other so I think you two get along! I bet you're communicating through telepathy!

Norman: 'More like glaring'

It's nothing like that and this is privacy violation.

Cicero: I agree with Barbara though boss. I never seen you guys hurt each other.

Norman: If she did, she would be dead by now. I'm sure you guys don't tolerate such behavior and Aishe understands that.

Cicero: True. She's quite loyal.

Barbara: Well, have fun you two! Make sure you're sparkly clean or you'll hear it from Vincent! Come on Cicero!

Cicero: Huh me too? Ah well I guess.

[Barbara and Cicero exit out the room, leaving Aishe and Norman there.]

Aishe: [stares]

Norman: [Sighs] Fine, let's get this over with.

Aishe: [advances and grabs his shirt, about to unbutton.]

Norman: [stops her hands] Woah! Wait wait! I can do that myself!

Aishe: [stares]

Norman: ...Are you seriously going to watch me undress?

Aishe: ? [Tilts her head]

Norman: Cut the acting already. I know you can understand me. You think I don't know you can talk?

Aishe: I was about to take my own bath but now I'm taking care of yours? I hate you.

Norman: I know. The others don't even know that you do, rather they probably are thinking the opposite. It's not like I'm forcing you.

Aishe: But if this is torture for you, then I want to do it. [Smirks]

Norman: [angry blush] Hey now...

Aishe: I'm joking. I'll turn around. [Turns her back to him.]

Norman: [mutters] You sure don't sound like you are joking. [He starts unbuttoning his shirt.]

Aishe: Don't think I can't sense if you try something.

Norman: I'm not that stupid. Same to you. Also, I'm not going to completely undress. Just the shirt is fine.

Aishe: Sure. Not like I care.

Norman: [takes off his shirt and starts the water running.]

Aishe: [turns around] Hey, since I'm here anyways, I can wash your back.

Norman: [not looking at her] You don't have to.

Aishe: [takes a bottle of body wash and applies some to his back suddenly.]

Norman: [flinches] That's cold!

Aishe: Great.

Norman: Ugh.

Aishe: Why don't you wash your hand anyways? I heard from Vincent.

Norman: You're suddenly curious now?

Aishe: You don't have to answer.

Norman: ...I haven't washed it since I hugged Emma goodbye.

Aishe: Emma?

Norman: She's a friend from the plantations. You wouldn't know her.

Aishe: Hmm...so she's important to you.

Norman: Yeah. Perhaps we'll see her one day.

[Aishe sprays some water over Norman's back.]

Norman: You seem experienced for someone who was in a demon's home.

Aishe: I take care of three dogs and I learned a lot from that place.

Norman: I suppose. That's strange though.

Aishe: You don't believe me?

Norman: I saw nothing good.

Aishe: You killed him before you could! Though I don't know what you went through either at that Lambda place. So I guess we're even. Doesn't mean I won't stop hating you.

Norman: Hm. You just stay silent when those guys talk about us getting along.

Aishe: Better to do that. It's not worth the trouble. Though it is a bit hilarious to see you denying it and them not really believing you.

Norman: [groans]

[Norman sprays water on his hands. Meanwhile, Aishe sees the numbers on his neck and begins to trace them with her finger. He turns to stop her, flustered.]

Norman: What are you doing?!

Aishe: It's not like I'm pointing a gun to your neck.

Norman: Still! Ugh whatever...

[Norman and Aishe stay silent for a while before Norman breaks the silence.]

Norman: ...You're lucky in a way.

Aishe: Huh?

Norman: You're not branded.

Aishe: That's supposed to be good?

Norman: It is. These brands...[He turns and grabs at his chest and neck where the brands are to show her. He makes a painful face.]

They're the mark of slavery and merchandise. We humans are nothing but food and experiments to those demons. That's why I must exterminate them. You can hate me all you want.

Aishe: ...

[Norman gets up from the bathtub.]

Norman: I think I'm done washing. Thanks.

[Norman leaves the bathroom. Aishe sits there in deep thought. She speaks in demon language.]

Aishe: So even if I tell you my side of the story, you won't change your mind huh.