#if nobody got me I know treecko got me

[demonfox38]

Completed - Pokémon Alpha Sapphire

Heck of a year for Pokémon, isn’t it? Between “Detective Pikachu” and the hype starting for “Pokémon Sword/Shield,” it’s been in the public talk a lot. So much so that even my mother is texting me questions about various Pokémon. Because of the stir and the evitability that I’ll be running “Pokémon Shield” to offset the gaggles of people that will play “Pokémon Sword,” I’ve decided to pre-emptively get my shit together with a Pokémon Bank account. So, you know how it goes, right? First, you archive your favorites, then your legendaries, then babies to use in your initial party for your next run and then Pokédex filler entries and so on and so forth until whoops! There’s purchases for Pokémon alts that weren’t beaten for even more entries!

I’m not kidding when I estimate having dropped at least $100.00 USD on Pokémon games this past month. And you damned well bet I saved other people’s Pokémon to my account! Nobody’s getting left behind! Especially not KittyPurry!

Kaylee, this was a great name.

In my mania, I picked up a copy of “Pokémon Alpha Sapphire.” Which, let’s be honest, is that really a good name for it? It’s my understanding that people who take the Blue/Silver/Sapphire/etc. path are usually more doing so out of reaction to their friends all being Red/Gold/Ruby types and wanting to help fill out Pokédexes. More of the omega position, if you catch my drift. But, I’m not one to shun being alpha. In fact, I prefer that.

Time to digress before I get too kid unfriendly, don’t you think?

My goal for picking up “Alpha Sapphire” was to finally get through Hoenn. Long story short, I consider Generation III to be the weakest iteration of Pokémon games. And I know. That makes me sound like a total Gen One snob. But, there are two things a Pokémon game lives and dies by. These are:

The affection a player has for their Pokémon.

The community of players helping each out.

When “Pokémon Sapphire” came out, the fever of the original “Pokémon” release in the US was dying down. The third generation of games was coming out on a completely new console, so there was a higher cost to investing in the game. As far as I can tell, there was no way to transfer GameBoy captured Pokémon to the GBA iteration. So, say goodbye to the friends you had built up. On top of that, the newer Pokémon just weren’t that engaging. At least, not to me. Like, Milotic’s cool, and I’ve got affection for Treeckos since my sister started raising geckos, but that’s about it. The music was farty, the legendary trio were a dull group of robots, and the new additions to the game were just zzz…

Even with a randomizer, I just couldn’t make it through the original version. I think the furthest I got was Mt. Chimney.

Now, I don’t like giving up on projects. My habits with keeping old video games running and finishing long fanfics are pretty good evidence of that, I think. Given the amount of history I was archiving from other Pokémon games, I wanted to make sure I got my Hoenn “certification” good and squared away. I even looked into seeing how to import older Pokémon critters into my bank account to see how far back I could go. Considering how much simpler it was to port through “Alpha Sapphire” than the original version of the game, I decided to go that route.

This time, I was able to successfully square the game away! But, what all had changed?

First of all, I’ve got to hand it to Generation VI and VII. They’ve made it a lot easier to both catch and bond with Pokémon. Built on “Pokémon X/Y”’s engine, “Alpha Sapphire” imported the PSS, Pokémon Amie, and Super Training minigames. This helped not only in raising the affection and physical stats of my squad, but occasionally even gave me a way to cheat out of a bad situation. Like, if you’re good Super Training, 60 HP of healing is literally just a minute or two away. Pokémon Amie also has the fun side effect of occasionally kicking in additional crits and move dodges, so it felt very rewarding to have that bond reaffirmed in tough battles.

Secondly—and I know this is going to get some eye rolls—I liked being able to haul my buddies out of my Pokémon Bank account. Like, the second I had my Pokédex, I had level one versions of a Vulpix, a Vaporeon, and a Furfrou in my squad. Eventually, a Sigilyph, too. For having such a trade-heavy team, I only ran into a disobedience cap once. Totally worth it to have my good ol’ reliables with me.

It’s not to say I didn’t have any “Sapphire” friends. Like, my Sceptile and Mightyena were handy! But, man. Raltzes are meant to be traded before grinding.

Third, there’s been a noticeable balance change. In my previous attempts with “Sapphire,” I had to be banging my head on the level cap for obedience before I had any success with clearing gyms and Team Aqua attempts. This time? Smooth sailing. Frankly, I ground in some places that I didn’t need to. I haven’t done stat checks on everything, but for when I did look, it seemed like enemy stats had been lowered in several locations. In particular, fighting Kyogre here was at level 45, where in other iterations it appeared to be at 70. Some numbers have been tweaked, and I can feel it.

Fourth, there was a noticeable design improvement. I mean, graphically, obviously. But, I’m talking more about a greater effort going into level design. I was particularly impressed with the modifications to Mauville City. What was once a town nearly identical to its predecessors was transformed into what appeared to be a multi-level shopping mall! Very funky; much appreciated. There were also modifications to dungeons and less of a need to use the HM Flash, which was also helpful (considering how I already had to lug around someone with Rock Smash or three different water navigation moves.)

As for other handy features, I really got into the sneaking and radar tracking part of the game. Basically, every once in a while, the game spawns a Pokémon with a unique trait (like a different move set) for you to sneak upon and catch. It was also nice that the game dumped several legendary Pokémon all at once into the field. Saves me work from other games!

Some of the game’s esoteric behavior remains. Like, I find the whole Braille cypher puzzles to be a strange addition. Apparently, the original game came with a Braille alphabet? That would have helped. God help the people hunting for Relicanths or Feebas. There’s a reason I’ve farmed them across several games. Them, and Tropius. Although, that one seems easier to get than I originally thought it would be.

Also, I never got into the contest scene. It’s this weird expansion from the main way of raising Pokémon to grading them on aesthetic properties of their moves (being cute, beautiful, clever, tough, or cool.) In the Alpha and Omega remakes, you can get a special Pikachu for participating one. Or, so I’ve heard. It’s just one of those things that I had no motivation to do. Ditto that secret clubhouse stuff. It just seems like a lot of work for little payout.

One of these days, I may appreciate Mega Evolution as well. It’s just not going to be today. Especially not when the opponents that used it against me fell like a sack of bricks within one or two turns.

The game could have made more use of its partner battles, for sure. I enjoyed what few were scattered around, as well as the different strategies they required. Not numerous enough to build move sets around, but good enough to make an encounter a little spicier. I can’t say that I feel as amiable about the addition of abilities to Pokémon. They can add some kinks to a fight, but unless they’re coming in with a weather switching ability or the Sturdy ability, they are trivial to work around.

Ruby and Sapphire have a strong kaiju vibe to their stories. Like, most of the Pokémon games now-a-days have one mythical savior or destroyer Legendary, but this game went super hard both into Pokémon as apocalyptic forces of nature (i.e. Kyogre, Groudon, and Deoxys) and protectors (Rayquaza.) That’s pretty much every Godzilla movie boiled down to its stock elements. I can’t say that I was big on any characters (to the point of missing the ability to change my appearance from X/Y), but I at least appreciated the story’s themes. Also, the rival teams could have been much worse. They’re no N, but at least Team Magma and Aqua’s leaders appear to show some capability of thought over their environment and the creatures that live in it.

Overall, “Pokémon Alpha Sapphire” is a remake that I completely appreciate. It turned a dull slog into a smoother experience. It’s a quick way to pick up both Generation III Pokémon, as well as a myriad of Legendaries. If you prefer the “Pokémon Sun/Moon” system and would rather use that to fill your Pokédex, the ultra variants of those games might be better suited for you. But, if you just need to get a good experience of Hoenn out of the way, this is the way to go.

[themurphyzone]

Absolutely Disastrous Ch 7

Sorry for the late chapter guys! I’ve gotten a new job recently and a class on top of that!

Ch 7: The Classy Skitty Man! A Different Kind of Challenge!  

“Wait, you can’t leave town! There’s some rare footprints I need to sketch!” a harried-looking artist pushed them away from his sketching grounds. “The nerve of some people! Can’t they recognize the potential discovery of a Regice’s footprints?”

Melissa ignored him, ripping off the yellow tape that blocked the route to Petalburg City.

The artist pushed up his glasses indignantly, the lenses flashing white. “Little girl,” he hissed dangerously. “You’ve disrespected the sanctity of Pokémon footprints. They’re a testament to the bond between trainer and Pokémon, and I will not stand for your mockery!”

He held up a Poké Ball.

Diogee scuffed the ground with his paw, but Milo held him back by the collar. “Wait a little more before battling, okay? We just got you healed from your fight with Shroomish and Minun.”

Diogee sat down with a small huff.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got this,” Melissa said, taking a battle stance. “Torchic, let’s boom!”

She pitched the Poké Ball like a baseball, only for the device to fall to the ground a foot away.

Picking it up sheepishly, she threw it again. The ball slammed into the ground six inches in front of her.

Melissa groaned. “Oh, come on!”

The artist crossed his arms. “Delaying your inevitable defeat is a terrible course of action.”

“You think I’m doing this on purpose?”

“-and when I was nine, I was kidnapped by a pack of Smeargle and covered in their painted footprints during a ritual to provide their paintbrush god with an earthly vessel so he could share the knowledge of art and footprints to lowly mortals,” the artist explained.

Zack almost choked on his soda. “Wow, that’s…really interesting.”

“What’s the name of the paintbrush god?” Milo asked.

The artist tapped his chin in thought. “Well, I guess the closest thing in English would be ‘Raphaelmichaelangeloleonardodonatello’.”

“Torchic, let’s boom!” Melissa shouted, finally managing three feet with her Poké Ball toss.

Torchic opened her beak, releasing several embers to pump herself up.

“Okay, we’re ready now!” Melissa exclaimed. She turned towards the boys, frowning when she saw they’d laid out the entire picnic spread while she was struggling to throw her Poké Ball. “It’s a little early for lunch.”

Milo shrugged. “Artie here doesn’t battle well on an empty stomach. And don’t worry, we’ll save you a sandwich.”

“An artist named Artie?” Melissa returned Artie’s glare coolly. “Who knew?”

“First you mock the sanctity of footprints, now you make fun of my name!” Artie growled, rushing into a battle position. “Prepare for your inevitable-“

Melissa rolled her eyes. “Less declarations of hatred, more battling please.”

Artie released a Pokémon with a cute beret perched on its head. Blue paint oozed from a paw marking on its back and tail tip. It stuck its tongue out adorably as Milo checked its dex entry.

“Smeargle, the Painter Pokémon. In a thousand years, human society will collapse and the Great Smeargle Era will begin. Turf wars will become the dominant competitive sport.”

“Paint the field, Smeargle!” Artie commanded.

Smeargle spun in place, flinging blue paint all over the grassy terrain. Torchic ducked her head, jumping back when a splash of paint hit her wings. Realizing that Artie and Smeargle didn’t seem to care where the substance touched, Milo threw on a paintproof poncho, which was large enough to cover Zack as well. As Melissa ordered a Peck attack, Milo helped Diogee into an Absol-sized poncho.

Torchic rushed towards Smeargle, her beak glowing brightly as it elongated into a white, sharpened point.

“Dodge and use Sketch!” Artie yelled.

Smeargle waved its tail as it darted to the side, conjuring a pencil that floated over to Torchic. Startled by the writing utensil, Torchic’s concentration slipped and she lost her balance, stumbling face-first into the paint. The pencil circled Torchic as she recovered from her fall, leaving a trail of pink sparkles behind. The Painter Pokémon touched the pencil, allowing it to flicker out of existence.

“Torchic, watch out!” Melissa shouted as Smeargle charged with its tail extended into a sharp paint-covered point. But Torchic was too busy shaking the paint off her body, not paying attention to the battle at hand. Smeargle jabbed Torchic with the point, and the Chick Pokémon skidded back several feet against the paint-covered ground.

“Keep at it, Smeargle!” Artie crowed.

This time, Torchic was ready and countered with her own Peck. The two Pokémon parried, jabbed, and blocked each other, avoiding strikes as they tried to dish out their own attacks. Melissa and Artie tried to give more instructions, but Torchic and Smeargle were too engrossed in their beak-to-tail swordfight to listen.

“This is really cool!” Milo exclaimed. “I haven’t seen a swordfight this good since the Gallade Kingdom arc of Dr. Magnezone!”

“Who’s cleaning all this paint up exactly?” Zack asked worriedly, glancing over his shoulder as if expecting a mob of senior citizens to hurl dentures at them for making a mess of their pristine town.

Torchic and Smeargle broke apart to catch their breath. Blue splotches of paint covered their bodies.

Melissa tensed, her eyes flickering over the field as she thought of her next move. Then she smiled triumphantly.

Milo knew that look.

She always smiled like that when she was about to do something sneaky.

“Paint attack!” Melissa yelled.

Torchic used her feet to fling a glob of paint at Smeargle’s eyes, and the Painter Pokémon stumbled back in shock. It rubbed its face to get rid of the paint, but only succeeded in smearing it all over the place.

“Hey, no fair!” Artie protested, glaring at Melissa. “Get a grip, Smeargle!”

“You brought it into the field and gave me access to a good weapon,” Melissa smirked. “It’s totally fair. Now, let’s finish this off with Ember!”

Milo, Zack, and Diogee shot up in alarm. “Melissa, no!” Zack yelled. “The paint might be-“

BOOM!

“-combustible.”

And that was how Oldale Town set the world record for fastest evacuation in the event of wildfire.

“-arson, graffiti, endangerment, public nuisance, vandalism, waking me up from my afternoon nap, and coercement via Deerling eyes for the girl,” Oldale Elliot had been rattling off various charges for the three teenagers in the holding cell for twenty minutes.

Mostly it was leveled at Milo and Melissa. Zack was being treated on a guilt-by-association basis.

Artie and Smeargle had made a hasty retreat when Oldale Elliot showed up. Smeargle’s fur had been slightly singed, but it was otherwise fine.

Oldale’s residents had been evacuated to either Littleroot or Petalburg until it was safe to return, and the local firefighters had contained the wildfire so quickly that it wasn’t necessary to call in the Mt. Chimney Fire Department for help.

Which was probably a good thing, since Melissa wasn’t keen on seeing her dad after their last argument.

Milo’s head was still spinning from the fact that they’d entered Petalburg in the back of a bona fide 2001 Volcarona brand fire truck. Only ten of those had ever been made, equipped with five different ladders and a bell that sounded like a volcanic eruption.

Okay, so Oldale Elliot had insisted on escorting them to the holding cell in Petalburg City and the staring and muttered complaints about the younger generation had been more than a little awkward but it was a 2001 Volcarona! How could he not be excited?

“Not even a week and we’ve already been arrested,” Zack sighed. He twirled Treecko’s Poké Ball in his hand. “Seriously, you’re supposed to confiscate someone’s Pokémon before arresting them.”

“We were evacuating the premises under the watchful eye of an escort,” Melissa replied, reclining on the rough wooden board that was supposed to pass for a bed. “We weren’t arrested.”

“Explain the holding cell then.”

“Relax. There’s no trial date,” Melissa smirked. “Yet.”

Zack glared at her. “You’re a natural at reassurance.”

“Thanks! I try,” Melissa said.

Unhappy with the current arrangements, Diogee had taken to pacing and scratching the walls with his claws. “Don’t worry. We’ll be out before you know it,” Milo soothed, trying to keep Diogee from wearing down his claws too much.

The wall behind him crumbled to pieces just as a much younger Elliot opened the door. A backwards baseball cap was perched on his head. “So these are the ones who caused the fire in your town, Gramps?” his voice cracked on the last syllable, and he rubbed his throat in embarrassment.

“Pay attention,” Oldale Elliot barked, thrusting his cane in Milo’s direction. “His sunny disposition is a façade to hide his unsafe delinquent ways.”

Then he pointed the cane at Melissa and Zack. “And these are whippersnappers Murphy has recruited into his crusade of destruction.”

“Heh, you said whippersnapper,” Milo giggled into his hand.

“No respect,” Oldale Elliot grumbled.

Before he could complain any further, footsteps echoed down the hall. “Please excuse my interruption, gentlemen,” a smooth, pleasant voice rang out.

A man in a black and red business suit stepped into the cell. His brilliant white smile didn’t falter even as Oldale Elliot muttered an insult under his breath while everyone else was just too confused to speak. Two Skitty perched on his shoulder, occasionally rubbing their faces against the man’s neck.

“Hello, children,” he greeted. He rubbed the Skitty under their chins, causing them to melt into a purring mess. “I’ve been looking for some fresh challengers lately, and you seem to fit the bill.”

When nobody replied, the man glanced over to Diogee. “Ah, pardon my manners. My name is Bob Block, but please just call me Bob. Mr. Block is my descendant. And these are two of my lovely Skitty, Kiki and Sophie. They insisted on coming along.”

Kiki and Sophie mewed as Diogee sniffed them curiously.

“I think my dad mentioned you at some point,” Melissa recalled. “Mostly to complain about your Skitty beating his highly trained Fire-types at the Gym Leader Annual Picnic.”

Bob chuckled. “You must be Richard’s daughter. Your dad’s got a bit of a competitive streak. His Torkoal is tough, but what can he expect it to do in an agility course?”

Oldale Elliot rapped his cane against the ground to get Bob’s attention. “And this is the problem with your generation! Always makin’ excuses for the youngins.”

“Gramps, watch it! You can’t talk to a gym leader like that!” Petalburg Elliot hissed.

“I’m old and I’ll talk to him however I want! It’s a perk!” Oldale Elliot retorted.

As they argued over basic decency, Bob circled Diogee curiously. Diogee kept his eyes trained on him. Satisfied, Bob gave a small hum and nodded.

“I also have a keen interest in creatures associated with the supernatural,” Bob said. “According to Pokélantis legends, Absol were messengers of Umbra, the god of darkness, and their appearance was a forewarning to tsunamis and hurricanes. Whereas in more recent history, a man had the idea to harness Absol’s power to predict natural disasters in order to save the lives of people and Pokémon alike. I find the duality rather fascinating.”

At the mention of his ancestor, Milo nodded eagerly. “That was Sheriff Murphy! His Absol was named Cassandra and together they traveled all around Hoenn to show people that Absol were just misunderstood and wanted to help humanity! He was so awesome!”

Bob laughed at Milo’s enthusiasm. “A Murphy, huh? Interesting. How would you like to come by my gym? I’ve got a challenge for you, but it would be much easier to explain on my turf instead of this, ah…quaint, rustic room.”

He took a step back to avoid the leaky ceiling.

Oldale Elliot grimaced. “You can’t just release them like that! You have no authority!”

“Tell me, good sir. Do you have jurisdiction in Petalburg?” Bob asked, stroking Kiki’s head as he waited for Oldale Elliot to come up with a response.

“No, not really…” Oldale Elliot grumbled.

“Do you have any objections?” Bob turned to Petalburg Elliot, who shook his head.

“Back in my day, gym leaders actually yielded to police,” Oldale Elliot muttered, shaking his cane threateningly at Milo as they exited the jailhouse.

When Milo thought of Pokémon gyms, usually a battlefield and several rows of seats for an audience came to mind. He didn’t expect plush carpets, an assortment of colorful toys, and at least ten climbing trees that were all currently occupied by Skitty.

The entire room was a Skitty’s paradise.

“Mind their tails, please,” Bob called as the group carefully waded through the sea of Skitty.

Bob brought them into a dining area, separated from the rest of the room by a glass wall. He gently nudged three Skitty away from the door.

“I like to issue a pre-battle challenge for trainers who want my badge,” Bob explained as he set a tray of cheese and crackers in front of the group. They tore into the snack immediately. Milo piled a little of everything onto a small plate, then placed it on the floor for Diogee. “Are all of you planning to battle me?”

Melissa shook her head. “Just Milo. So what’s the challenge?”

A Skitty jumped into Bob’s lap, and he stroked it absentmindedly. The action reminded Milo heavily of the evil Silverfinger’s iconic Persian petting in Clauncherhunter IV: Get a Pincer Grip.

“Simple. A game of hide and seek with all my Skitty. They hide all over Petalburg, you try to find them. They won’t venture beyond city limits, don’t worry,” Bob replied. “If you manage to find them all, you may challenge me without any badges. I require that you obtain one badge for each Skitty you don’t find. If you miss more than eight Skitty, you can retake the challenge in a week. How does that sound?”

“Great!” Milo exclaimed. “So am I allowed help for this?”

Bob nodded. “You may enlist your friends’ help. I would prefer that you not battle my Skitty unless a situation warrants it.”

“We’re in. I’ve got siblings so I’m a master hide and seeker,” Zack boasted.

“At hiding or seeking?” Melissa asked.

Zack slumped. “Mostly hiding. Lee and Lance tend to cheat.”

Bob blew a whistle, and every Skitty filed out of the play area. The Skitty on his lap pushed the door open with its nose and followed them into the open air. He gave a lazy grin.

“You have until sunset. Good luck!”

The first ten Skitty were all hanging out by a pond next to the gym, offering no protest when Diogee herded them back into the play area. They’d clearly hung around the gym on purpose so they could get to the most coveted toys first.

“I see another one!” Milo shouted, pointing at a Skitty who somehow made her way up to the awning of a small grocery store. Covering his head with a fireman helmet as a precaution, he climbed a stepladder until he was level with the Skitty. He was close enough to read the tag on her lavender collar.

“Aw, so you’re Kit!” Milo cooed. “My name’s Milo. Hi. I’m just gonna get you down, okay?”

Kit tilted her head, mewing in confusion.

“I’m holding the ladder!” Zack yelled from below. “Wait, sir, don’t walk under…ugh, that guy’s gonna be having some bad luck.”

As Milo reached for Kit again, the sound of metal crashing against each other followed by someone’s yowl filled the air. Kit startled, jumping onto Milo’s head in fright and knocking his fireman helmet back. Milo slowly descended, gripping the sides of the ladder tightly since his vision was obscured by pink and cream fur.

Zack grimaced at the sight of two paramedics helping a man onto a gurney. “I told him not to walk under the stepladder.”

Melissa had been more interested in her Pokédex than her surroundings. “The Pokédex says Skitty are attracted to moving objects. We can save time if we get them to come to us. Milo, you got any craft supplies in your bag?”

Fifteen minutes later, Zack was completely slathered in a rainbow yarn and feather monstrosity. Milo and Diogee collapsed in laughter, and Melissa snapped photos of a very disgruntled Zack. Her camera hand was shaky due to her giggling.

“I need new traveling partners,” Zack complained to Kit, who mewed happily as she batted the ends of the yarn back and forth.

“Sorry, Zack,” Melissa snickered. “But you drew the short straw. Literally.”

She flashed the straws they’d used to decide who was wearing the Skitty Attractor Suit.

“It’s popular with our focus group too,” Milo added, teasing Kit with the end of a string.

“C’mon, Skitty Man,” Melissa grinned. “Let’s see how popular you are.”

“Don’t call me that,” Zack grumbled, but he allowed Milo and Melissa to parade him around.

As they wandered through town, Skitty popped out from drainage pipes, mailboxes, flowerbeds, and places Milo didn’t know Skitty could fit inside. Melissa extracted another Skitty from a discarded tissue box, setting her in front of a loose string.

Milo did a quick headcount, which was made more difficult by the Skitty’s constant shifting.

“Twenty-one, twenty-two…. Zack, could you hold still?” Milo asked. “Now I lost count.”

Slightly dazed from being knocked over, Zack sighed heavily. “Yes, Milo. Cause it’s completely possible to remain still when covered in yarn, feathers, and Skitty.”

“Okay, thanks,” Milo said. He started another headcount while Zack tried to keep Skitty away from his face.

“Alright, I’ve got thirty-seven,” Melissa announced. “We’ll take the long way back, see if there’s anyone we missed and-“ she paused when a harsh howl pierced the air. Melissa scrambled away from the alley. “What was that?”

Thankfully, the Skitty were too preoccupied with Zack’s outfit to care.

“Diogee, you stay and guard Zack and the Skitty,” Milo ordered. Diogee whined, his red eyes pleading. Milo ruffled the top of his head. “You have an important job too. Make sure none of the Skitty run off so we can challenge Bob soon.”

At the prospect of a tough battle, Diogee perked up.

“Torchic, help us out!” Melissa said, forgoing the dramatic throw and settling for a simple release. When the red light faded, Torchic got into a battle stance.

Milo shone a flashlight behind a dumpster, but didn’t see anything except for a torn plastic lid.

A stack of cardboard boxes rattled next to a wall, a Skitty’s mews intermingling with the growls of a dark gray canine.

“A Poochyena,” Melissa breathed, her eyes lighting up. “I’ve always wanted one, but they don’t live around Lavaridge.”

“Well, now’s your chance to catch one,” Milo suggested. “I’ll focus on getting the Skitty away.”

Melissa smiled. “Thanks. Torchic, Ember on Poochyena!”

Torchic sprung into action, several fiery cinders raining down around Poochyena. Poochyena’s attention shifted to Torchic, allowing Milo to grab Skitty from the top of the stack.

“Gotcha,” Milo murmured, calming Skitty with several pats to the head.

Poochyena tackled Torchic into a garbage can, holding the squirming Fire-type down with his front paws. Then he revealed sharp fangs that crackled with electricity.

“I wasn’t expecting you to know Thunder Fang,” Melissa muttered.

As Poochyena and Torchic struggled against the garbage cans, something purple and hand-shaped drooped over the opening.

“That’s it! Grab the glove and shove it in Poochyena’s face!” Melissa yelled.

In one smooth motion, Torchic grabbed the glove with her beak and yanked hard enough to dislodge it from the rest of the garbage. The end fell into Poochyena’s open mouth, startling him enough to let Torchic go. Thunder Fang harmlessly discharged into the glove.

“Rubber insulates against electricity,” Melissa said.

“Murphy’s Law has its uses as an educational tool,” Milo grinned.

“Would you call my dad and tell him that?” Melissa called over her shoulder. “Torchic, finish with Scratch!”

Torchic raked her feet against Poochyena’s side, pushing him back. Poochyena whined, ears flat against his head as he recovered.

“Poké Ball, go!” Melissa cried, trying out a two-handed toss that was more characteristic of someone from Dragonite Ball Z than a Pokémon trainer. The Poké Ball dropped from her hands and rolled away uselessly.  

Milo retrieved the ball while Melissa tossed the second one, which also failed.

Torchic and Poochyena exchanged glances as the pile of Poké Balls built up around Melissa.

After the tenth failed throw, Poochyena nosed a ball open and allowed himself to be sucked in. The ball snapped shut, wiggled three times, and emitted the small noise that marked a successful capture.

“One of these days I’m gonna throw one right,” Melissa muttered.

“How did you find your pre-battle challenge? Interesting? Fun?” Bob asked once all the Skitty were brought back into the play area.

“Both,” Milo said. “Melissa caught a Poochyena.”

“Poochyena are said to be loyal partners,” Bob noted. “But in case you haven’t noticed, I’m a Skitty person.” He laughed at his own joke. “Anyway, you missed four of my darlings. Don’t worry about them, they’re all trained to come inside at sundown. Please feel free to come back when you have at least four badges.”

“Good,” Zack growled as he shrugged off the Skitty Attractor Device. “This thing was itchy.”

“An interesting feat of ingenuity though,” Bob said.

Zack scowled. “That’s because you weren’t the one wearing it.”

“Alright, we did your challenge,” Melissa said. “Any idea where we’re heading now?”

“Rustboro City,” Bob replied. “Go through Petalburg Woods and you’ll be there in no time. It’s also home to the Pokémon School and the Mahlson Corporation.”

“I swear I’ve heard that name somewhere before,” Zack said, running a hand through his hair as he tried to remember.

“Orton Mahlson is the creator and star of Dr. Magnezone, in addition to being the Hoenn champion,” Milo supplied. “His dad is the CEO of Mahlson Corp, which originally started as a zoning commission and grew into the lead research facility we know it as today!”

“Forgive him, he’s from Johto,” Melissa clarified for Bob.

Bob chuckled. “No problem. Now, why don’t you head for the Pokémon Center and rest up? Petalburg Woods has a very…distinct layout and you’ll need your energy.”

Milo, Melissa, and Zack gathered their belongings and turned to leave.

“We’ll be back once I get four badges!” Milo waved at Bob and Skitty, forcing Melissa to pull him away from the path of an oncoming van. “So, he’s pretty cool!”

“Don’t praise him in front of me, Milo,” Melissa warned. “Poochyena are loyal partners and that’s a fact, not a rumor.”

AN: Hoo boy so this chapter got away from me. Hope you guys liked it!

[stellar-chrondrite]

How about all the starter pokemon for the meme thing? And congrats on catching your shiny Bulbasaur :)

Pokémon Ask Meme

Thanks for the ask anon! I’ll leave out the Gen 8 starters due to spoilers for those who don’t want to know anything about Sword and Shield - otherwise, here we go!

(All are my own opinions; I’m not enforcing them over anyone else’s opinions. You are free to think what you think.)

Bulbasaurnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveIf I’d started playing Pokémon in Gen 1, Bulbasaur totally would have been my starter. Love this thing (and having its Shiny in Let’s Go Eevee now helps a LOT).Also running inside joke between me and bf about Bulbasaur running the mafia and controlling Kanto made me love this ‘saur so much more.

Charmandernot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveThe fire lizard is cute. Feels kinda odd that the ‘original Dragon-like mon’ isn’t ranked higher … but that’s just how I feel about it.Oh, it’s also Bulbasaur’s right-hand man in the mafia after a brutal struggle to stop it taking over Kanto.

Squirtlenot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveAlso cute. Plus it gets cannons when it grows up. It’s a trainee in the Kanto Army. Probably the weapons master in the Bulba Mafia. (I need to explain this whole mess sometime!)

Chikoritanot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveI used to think it was cute. Now … yeah sure it’s still cute, but it’s not really one of my favs anymore.

Cyndaquilnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveStarter I picked in SoulSilver and so adorable. Also like the Shiny ... but where the heck are some awesome blue flames for it?! PFQ has an Albino Cyndaquil with brilliant blue flames!

Totodilenot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveStarter I picked for Virtual Crystal. Oh Brionac … I LOVE Totodile’s Gen 2 sprite. And it’s super awesome. (Wish I could get an Ice-Type move before Falkner though XD …)

Treeckonot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate fave… not much to say here. Nostalgia mostly to blame. First Pokémon I ever had (female too!!!) and I ADORE all reptiles - nobody can stop me from loving Treecko. One of my all-time favourite Pokémon.It kinda doesn’t help that Dan Green voiced Ash’s Treecko - you know, the same amazing guy who voiced Yugi and Yami in Yu-Gi-Oh if ya didn’t know? 

Torchicnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveI know my bf and a lot of people will disagree with me here. I did use a Torchic for an Alpha Sapphire play-through … but she really disappointed me. She couldn’t even take down Steven’s Mega Metagross, instead fainting and leaving my ALTARIA to do the job. Yep, you heard me right. Altaria. That useless, rubbish Dragon-Type.  

Mudkipnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveIn-game, Mudkip is kinda forgettable to me. What really pushes it to cute is the fan-art. When other people draw it, it’s too adorable!

Turtwignot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveEh, forgettable to me. Haven’t used one. I do like Ash’s Turtwig and the character development it got as it evolved, having to deal with its loss of speed and learning new tactics to capitalise on its new strengths.

Chimcharnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveSuper Saiyan monkey. Starter in Diamond and Platinum. Blaze was awesome; fast and hard-hitting. Fire monkeys are awesome.

Piplupnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveUsed one in Pearl and he’s a good defensive wall (that’s Gauge for ya). Penguin love runs in the family. Not a big fan of Dawn’s Piplup though - he can be a bit too prideful at times XD.

Snivynot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveDefinitely prefer Snivy over the other two Unova starters. Smug snake rules. Plus Grass and another reptile? Sign me up. I used Snivy for both Black and Black 2 - both are called Sniver (unoriginal I know ^_^; ).

Tepignot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveDon’t really like Tepig a whole bunch. The only time I used one was during a ‘Red Dwarf’ play-through of Black.

Oshawottnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveAgain, not a big fan of Oshawott. Getting shell scimitars is pretty cool though. Wait … does that mean Oshawott could eventually fit in with Agrabah’s palace guards in Aladdin?! 

Chespinnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveYou’d think a person who loves hedgehogs - such as myself - would love Chespin. Well, it’s cute, I’ll give it that. Not too crazy on Clemont’s one. Otherwise, I’m average on Chespin.

Fennekinnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveI’ll admit, when Gen 6 was announced I was Team Fennekin. But then Froakie got Frogadier and I was torn. I eventually went with Froakie when X and Y came out - and I’m glad I did. I still think Fennekin is average in design; besides we already have our cute fire fox in Vulpix.

Froakienot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveMy starter for Y. Froakie itself is cute and I like its little bubble cape. When it evolves is when things get serious ‘cause I happen to side with ninjas in the age-old struggle ‘pirates VS ninjas’. I wish Froakie would smile in-game more though.

Rowletnot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveStarter for Moon. Team Rowlet was the team I wanted to be on when the first stage evos were revealed. However Rowlet hasn’t really grown on me much over the years. The leaf bow tie is dapper and all but it’s not really that interesting. Decidueye, however, is for another time.

Littennot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate faveI’m quite surprised a lot of people abandoned Litten for Rowlet as time marched on. I’ve also used one in Ultra Moon (Vision is pretty cool) and am using another in my all-female Sun team. Goth cat is cool and I really like the Shiny … but again it doesn’t really appeal to me.

Popplionot my favorite │ average │ cute │ adorable │ best │ ultimate favePopplio is the starter I didn’t use first-time round - but boy is it the best. I was torn between Rowlet and Popplio when they were revealed and I’m sad I didn’t use Popplio first-time round. I have used one though - my awesome boy Neil in the first play-through of Sun. Seriously, I love Popplio a lot and it needs more love.

[dontdowhatisayandnobodygetshurt]

Do the emoji asks that you like and haven't been asked yet

MAMA HI THANK YOU SO MUCH <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why?

TREECKO AND MORELULL BC I GOT A STUFFED TREECKO TOY WHEN I WAS 9 AND I STILL HAVE HIM AND HE’S MY BEST BUDDY AND MORELULL BC I HAVE A TINY MORELULL NAMED STEVIE AND HE MADE ME CRY ONCE BC HE WAS SLEEPY AND HIS TINY LITTLE PEEPY NOISES ARE SO ADORABLE AND HE’S SO SM O L. :’D Honestly I could talk about Pokemon and my Pokemon forever :’) :’) :’)

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

Fink - Looking Too Closely

James Blunt - No Bravery

ODESZA - A Moment Apart

Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure

Mahmood - Soldi

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn?

I only know English and I’m kind of bad at it lmaooo but I’ve fallen in love with Spanish, and I also want to learn Russian bc I think it’s beautiful. <3 And Hungarian for a few certain beans I know and love :PP <3 <3

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?

Okay so I absolutely believe in ghosts and I’ve had a lot of experiences with it and I could talk for ages but I wanna talk about one in particular here just because.

So at one point when I was about 15, my family and I were thinking of investing in this old hospital (because my Mum’s fucking crazy and definitely one of those white moms who gets murdered in horror movies X’D ) that was dirt cheap. It was a beautiful place, had this fucking massive beautiful old tree, and it really was beautiful in every way, just old.

But man oh man, was it haunted. You could feel it just by looking at it. We visited it twice, and my hairs didn’t lie flat the whole time we were there. It wasn’t a bad feeling, just... a feeling. Like there was this big dining room area that had floor-to-ceiling windows looking outside. And whenever you walked past, you could feel eyes on you, not in the ‘oh this is creepy’ kind of way, but the ‘I would bet 1000 bucks if I turn around somebody will be looking me at’ kind of way, and not just one person, a ton. I heard singing at one point and my Dad tried to pass it off as just the wind whistling but it was a lady singing, I’m sure.

But the weirdest part came at the end of the first trip. I used to wear a necklace that had a tree seed on it, a little smaller than a walnut shell. It was deeply personal and special to me and I never took it off. So I was just standing by myself (near those windows, too) and I felt somebody grab the seed, like somebody had been standing next to me, reached over and grabbed it. Didn’t pull or anything, but I felt somebody’s skin against mine. It wasn’t just a brush, either, I felt it like somebody was holding it in their fist - and a small fist, like a child’s hand. So I turned around bc I thought maybe it was my Mum??, but nobody was there. The feeling just... vanished. I didn’t feel scared or threatened or anything, I had a feeling it had been a little kid that was curious.

And since that day, I kept getting the name Gretel (or Greta) in my head and I have this feeling that the kid checks in on me/us from time to time. Lmao it might have just been my imagination, but it never hurts to be respectful + kind just in case. I like to think that she and my baby sister play together in the afterlife. <3

and finally, bc I never pass up the opportunity....

😘 talk about your crush or partner

My crush, aka the absolute best cookie in the whole world. One of the smartest, most responsible people I know, so inspiring and so, so freaking strong. The type of person you just KNOW is going to go out into the world and improve it without even trying, just by being themself, and when they DO try, god the world doesn’t stand a CHANCE. They make the world better just by existing. They radiate so much pure, undiluted goodness and they’re so kind and they’re so, SO unbelievably talented. I wish with my whole heart they could see themself the way I and all their other friends see them, because they deserve to love everything about themself and it kills me that they don’t. I’m just always so, so proud of them and I will be forever, I’m so lucky and honoured to know them and I love them so much. Every time I start losing faith in the world, I just think about them and I regain it again. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

emoji asks <3

[mega-aggron]

ask meme 1-150

¯\_(ツ)_/¯gdi winston

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

erica, my friend across the hall

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

super shy ;-;

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

idk! i’ve gotten a surprising amount of diversity in friend and family interactions the last week or so. pretty content right now.

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i think so? i hope so.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i’d hope so?

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

funny people. broad guys. guys with beards.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ who knows. 

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

lorde lmao

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

not really, i just usually can’t provide much input on the subject

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

uH probably my mom

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Going good, spent the weekend at home for Father’s Day. How’re you doing?”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

shit fuck why is this always a question (at least they give me a top five instead of making me choose one :p) more recent faves:

perfect places [lorde]

pool [paramore]

bandages [hey rosetta!]

cut to the feeling [carly rae jepsen]

youth (day) [oohyo]

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

i don’t mind.

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

i mean jesus did some cool shit but i don’t really think much about miracles in a modern context

15. What good thing happened this summer?

got a job doing fun web dev work :D

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

i can’t remember the last person i kissed

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

yeah! probs not our solar system (or even close) but it is likely!!! man read up on the fermi paradox or the drake equation and get back to me, i think this shit is so interesting

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

first “crush” (thought i was straight lol): nofirst real crush: yep! not super frequently but we just got ice cream with some friends recently

19. Do you like bubble baths?

haven’t had one in like 13 years but i don’t see why not

20. Do you like your neighbors?

yes! they’re my closest friends

21. What are you bad habits?

procrastination (but i usually pull through in the end)

22. Where would you like to travel?

so many places my dude. dubai seattle and back to san francisco are probs current top 3

23. Do you have trust issues?

i don’t think so. at the very least, not usually

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

don’t really have one

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

my weight :/ i hate looking like a twig but have stayed this weight for like 4 years. also i don’t embody the physical traits i find attractive in other people so i just kinda think of myself as an unattractive person

26. What do you do when you wake up?

wait for my second alarm to go off and roll back under the covers

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

i’m pale as fuck and sunburn, i wish i could tan at the very least

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my friends? hashbrowns, friends across the hall, roommates, sleepovers with nitesh, dnd squad, all good options

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

nah lol i had a boyfriend for like a month it really wasn’t meant to be

30. Do you ever want to get married?

yeah! someday™

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

no, but the top is getting longer than usual even though i just had a haircut oops

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

yowza hello what

33. Spell your name with your chin.

wwereecvdb

(well that could have gone better)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

volleyball during the school year. i just got a summer gym membership so who knows maybe i’ll swim or run more

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

tv hands down. i already don’t watch it a whole lot but wowza i love music

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yes

it sucks

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i don’t really think many silences are awkward? if anything i guess i try to think up a new topic to talk about but most of the time i’m fine staying quiet

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

isn’t this like #6

idk someone who likes laughing and is a nice person. video games, beards, and being bigger than me are also plusses

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

uniqlo is a fun store

40. What do you want to do after high school?

LOL

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

usually. i mean it depends on context (like, if you cheat on someone, you probably don’t deserve a second shot at that in my book) but most of the time i think forgiveness is on the table for a first offense. but if behaviors repeat for a long time, i’m less inclined to offer it.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

i’m probably thinking about something, zoning out, or disagree with whatever was just said and am not trying to start something

43. Do you smile at strangers?

sometimes!

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

spaaaaaaaaaaaace

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

the fear of disappointing others realizing i’ve spent as much time as possible in bed without making myself late

46. What are you paranoid about?

not much?

47. Have you ever been high?

no

48. Have you ever been drunk?

yes

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

i don’t think so?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

red

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

i literally wish i was sara bareilles but other than that no

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

just like… my body structure as a wholeor maybe just the ability to grow a better beard, i am not about this 90% neckbeard life

53. Favourite makeup brand?

don’t wear any

54. Favourite store?

nintendo world store

55. Favourite blog?

mine #getrekt

nah idk

56. Favourite colour?

turquoise / teal

57. Favourite food?

hhhhh cheese tortellini w/ pesto

58. Last thing you ate?

orange chicken, sweetfire chicken, and chow mein from panda express

59. First thing you ate this morning?

a bowl of cinnamon toast crunch

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

i won a beauty pageant freshman year with my talent being rapping busta rhymes’ verse from look at me now and a choreography to super bass

i won a battle of the bands with the hip hop orchestra to be an opening act for t-pain and lil dicky when they performed here too

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

no

62. Been arrested? For what?

no

63. Ever been in love?

not in the reciprocated romantic way yet

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

i was lying on his bed watching a movie when he turned over to face me. we looked each other in the eye for a while before closing them and going for it.

65. Are you hungry right now?

li’l bit, but i’m not even halfway through these questions so i’m trying not to think about it

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

it’s a venn diagram, some of my closest irl friends are my tumblr friends and vice versa

67. Facebook or Twitter?

fb

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nope

70. Names of your bestfriends?

i mean this list would be like 20 names long because i don’t really use the title “best friend” but nitesh winston jared and siddy are all pretty high up there

71. Craving something? What?

nothing atm

72. What colour are your towels?

teal

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

1 to 3. usually have 3 on my bed.

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

nope

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

on campus i have my eeveelution plushies, a totoro plush and a kicks plush. at home i probably still have some webkinz, a build-a-bear dog, a giant togepi, and a treecko.

75. Favourite animal?

oh geez idk i just…. love all of them

i really love australian blue cattle dogs, elephants, parrots, chinchillas, and otters

76. What colour is your underwear?

uh it varies but today they’re white

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla ice cream, chocolate pretty much everything else

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

vanilla, mint chocolate chip, or cotton candy

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

blue

80. What colour pants?

teal

(i’m in pajamas it’s ok that these colors clash)

81. Favourite tv show?

geez i’m really out of touch with tv

parks and rec was good? fma brotherhood? good

82. Favourite movie?

begin again

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

is this even a question? original

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

only have seen 22 jump street but i think i’d prefer mean girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

why is this person so obsessed with mean girls

idk i like cady?

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

dory probably. or squirt

87. First person you talked to today?

brent

88. Last person you talked to today?

satvik

89. Name a person you hate?

orange president

90. Name a person you love?

@caqtuscomics

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

see #89

92. In a fight with someone?

no

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

2? maybe 3?

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

2

95. Last movie you watched?

legit could not tell you lol

as a substitute, last musical i watched was sound of music last night at the kennedy center

96. Favourite actress?

…sara bareilles

97. Favourite actor?

mark ruffalo is pretty cool

98. Do you tan a lot?

NO I BURN

99. Have any pets?

yeah! parents have a dog named zoe and i love her

100. How are you feeling?

pretty ok! fluctuated the past couple days but i’m ok now

101. Do you type fast?

yes (perks of being in cs)

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

not a whole lot tbh. nothing that was so bad i’d want to go back and redo. i think.

103. Can you spell well?

yeah

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

some high school friends, i guess. but it’s been long enough that i’m kind of over it, the ones that i miss most still make efforts to keep in touch so it’s fine

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

just once, i think

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

not as far as i know

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yep! family friend rides horses and let us on hers over the years.

108. What should you be doing?

nothing! finally. (realistically, getting back into journaling. that fell by the wayside this semester and i’d love to get back into that.)

109. Is something irritating you right now?

not really. since the semester ended things have been pretty calm

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

.-.

111. Do you have trust issues?

deja vu

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

i don’t cry in front of others often. not afraid to or anything, just doesn’t happen a lot. possibly satvik back in like september

113. What was your childhood nickname?

got called punkin’ by my mom (short for chunkin’ punkin’ because i was a fat baby) but didn’t really have nicknames from my friends

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yep! fairly regularly

115. Do you play the Wii?

geez when was this survey made

play on my switch now. n64 and wii u occasionally :p

116. Are you listening to music right now?

nope

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

it’s ok!

118. Do you like Chinese food?

ye

119. Favourite book?

the kite runner by khaled hosseini

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

not really, though i still do weird things sometimes because of the dark (double takes, turn lights on/off)

121. Are you mean?

i hope not! i really don’t think so

122. Is cheating ever okay?

no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

haven’t tried :p don’t get white shoes often

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

sigh i wish but i think it’s more lust than anything most of the time

125. Do you believe in true love?

not like “there is 1 person in this world destined for me” but i like the concept of making one’s relationship as strong as it can be

126. Are you currently bored?

well, i have answered 125 questions so far without looking for something more entertaining to do

127. What makes you happy?

pokemon, music, the mcelboys, humor, overwatch…

128. Would you change your name?

last name for marriage sure why not

first name i’m cool with not changing

129. What your zodiac sign?

leo

130. Do you like subway?

ye

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

inform them that i am unfortunately super duper gay

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

again, deja vu

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

hm!!!! geez there are so many good lyrics from after laughter and melodrama

“I’m underwaterWith no air in my lungsMy eyes are openI’m done giving up” - pool, paramore

“All the nights spent off our facesTrying to find these perfect placesWhat the fuck are perfect places anyway?“ - perfect places, lorde

134. Can you count to one million?

i mean, i know the order of the numbers but god forbid i try this anytime soon

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

geez idk once when i was 7 i told my grandma i couldn’t find my watch while i was staring right at it so when i wasn’t looking she took it from me and swatted my hand for fibbing

as far as i know, no lies i’ve told have had big consequences; i don’t lie that often other than what time i’ve gone to bed to my parents back in highschool

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

6′3

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i love wavy hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

night

142. Favourite month?

geez idk most of them are pretty good. may is nice, august is my birthmonth.

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

dark = milk > white

145. Tea or Coffee?

don’t really drink either, but leaning towards tea (esp. chai)

146. Was today a good day?

yeah it was alright :)

147. Mars or Snickers?

uh never had a mars but i’m not too big a fan of snickers so i’ll risk it

148. What’s your favourite quote?

life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

nah

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“The Great Tree stands in the center of a vast forest, and a variety of living things come here to ask for its blessing.” (Hyrule Historia)

[themurphyzone]

Absolutely Disastrous Ch 8

Ch 8: Lost in the Woods! Another Costumed Weirdo?

“I think we’re lost.”

“We’re not lost. We’ve taken a slight detour from the recommended path.”

“So we’re lost.”

“Think of it as the scenic route,” Milo suggested, looking at his map again. Before he could show Melissa and Zack their current location in the Petalburg Woods, a Linoone snatched the paper out of his hands and disappeared into a clump of berry bushes.

Unfazed, Milo brought out a second map. “Okay, so we’re near a bunch of Oran trees right now, so if we head north we should see some birches and hang the second right.”

Zack groaned, resting his back against a mossy rock. “Too bad everything looks the same.”

“I also have a topography map, a latitude map, and a map of Silph Co’s ventilation and teleporter system,” Milo said. “Never really understood their teleporter thing. Seems kinda bad for employee morale.”

They’d been wandering around Petalburg Woods all morning, and so far they’d had little luck making sense of their surroundings. Every tree looked the same, packed together so densely that it was almost impossible to tell where one tree ended and another began. He’d heard ghost stories of a forest in Sinnoh. According to the tales, it was always nighttime because the sun’s rays never reached the ground, making it a prime spot for ghosts to lure unsuspecting travelers to their dilapidated manor.

Dr. Magnezone fans loved using Sinnoh’s folklore and ghost stories as inspiration. Milo once saw Sara cry over a fanfic where Dr. Magnezone had to search for a Lunar Wing to relieve Time Infernape of a Darkrai-inflicted nightmare before the stress killed him.

“Hey, let’s break for a bit,” Melissa said. She laid down on a large protruding root. “I can’t wait to get out of forest territory.”

Milo found a cozy spot next to a fallen log, and Zack reclined against a tree trunk.

“Zack, there’s gotta be some spooky tales in Johto,” Milo said. “You should tell us one!”

“Yeah, spill!” Melissa prodded Zack in the arm.

Zack winced and rubbed his arm. “Do you cut your nails into claws or something?”

Melissa shrugged. “I jab hard, Underwood. You gonna tell us a ghost story or what?”

“Neither of you are gonna let up until I tell you one, huh?” Zack sighed.

“Nope!” Milo and Melissa chorused. Diogee looked up from his water bowl, red eyes boring expectantly into Zack.

“Fine,” Zack said. “This one isn’t for the faint of heart, so be warned.”

Milo and Melissa leaned forward in anticipation.

“Two millennia ago, a beautiful maiden fell in love with a soldier. One day, the soldier had to go fight in a distant land. As the maiden watched him disappear over the horizon, she swore she would never fall in love with anyone else, and that she would always look towards the ocean in anticipation of his return.”

Milo’s eyes started to water. Melissa gripped her skirt tightly.

“The years passed, but she still waited. Every suitor was turned down, all attempts to coax her away from the cliff failed. Eventually, a deity took pity on her. She agreed to be transformed into a statue atop the cliff so she could continue watching the horizon. The deity also appointed a messenger Pokémon to maintain the house and keep the maiden’s soul company while she kept her eternal vigil. To this day, she continues to wait and pray.”

Milo wiped away a stray tear, and Diogee had to carefully nudge him a few feet so a tree didn’t crash on top of him.

“That was…sad,” Melissa admitted. “How ‘bout something in the horror department to even it out?”

“Gimme a minute,” Milo said, burying his face into Diogee’s fur to calm himself down. “I got one.”

He took a deep breath, holding a flashlight under his chin for added dramatic effect. Zack drew a sharp breath.

“Once there was a little girl who lived in a cottage. Her mommy and daddy scrounged and begged and pleaded for scraps of food, for they were poorer than dirt,” Milo began, keeping his voice so low that Melissa and Zack had to strain to hear him.

He paced as he continued the story, feeling three sets of innocent eyes processing every word and movement. Milo smirked and continued. “One day, the little girl was left alone in the house. As she did her daily chores like any good child would do, she looked out the window. A doll laid in the dirt, its seams torn and one of its button eyes missing. It was ugly and nobody would’ve spared a second glance. But the little girl took pity on the doll and fixed it up with the only bolt of spare fabric her family had.”

“Oh no,” Zack whispered. Melissa elbowed him.

“When the last seam was closed, the doll offered to grant three wishes for the little girl. First, she wished that her family would never go hungry again. That night, her parents came home to find a feast fit for a royal banquet waiting for them. The little girl showed them the doll and explained what she’d done, and her parents were too grateful to question her any further. But trouble arose when the mother didn’t have material to make new clothes with, so the little girl asked the doll for endless wealth so her mother could purchase the finest and rarest silks and wool. The doll granted the second wish, and the family lived happily for many years.”

“The little girl grew into a beautiful woman, and she attracted the attention of a prince. They courted for a while, and the woman showed him the doll who’d saved her family from poverty. Disgusted by its horrible appearance, the prince broke off their engagement and rode away into the night. Because she still loved him, the woman asked the doll to grant her final wish: have the prince fall back in love with her. Once it was granted, the woman laid the doll on her childhood bed and went back to the castle. She planned to never return to the cottage and sever all ties with her poverty-filled life to make sure the prince stayed in love with her.”

Milo paused. The tension was thick enough to cut with a butter knife.

“The woman married the prince and forgot all about the doll. But the doll never forgot her. It granted all her wishes without complaint. It kept her company for ten years. And now it laid in a dark room, never to see the sun again. Anger consumed its mind. Oh, how it thirsted for vengeance. It flew to the castle on an otherworldly energy, and there it spotted the woman, brushing her hair…alone.”

He could see the whites of Zack’s eyes, and Milo crept closer, curling his hands into claws and looming as best he could.

“It crept closer…closer…closer…” Milo punctuated each word with a silent step until he hovered over Zack. Zack pressed himself against the tree with a strangled yelp.

“-and then it POUNCED!”

“AIYEEEH!”

Milo pulled Zack to his feet, laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe. “Oh man!” Milo doubled over. “That was, ha! Got you real good!”

Zack just stared at him. “I didn’t scream.”

“Wasn’t me either,” Melissa said. “Believe me, you would know if Zack screamed cause he sounds like a plucked Swellow. Whoever screamed a few minutes ago has more of a tone-deaf Loudred combined with a sick Swablu frequency.”

“I don’t sound like a plucked Swellow,” Zack mumbled.

“NO! DON’T TAKE MY PAPERS!”

Everyone jumped to their feet as a terrified businessman rushed past their resting spot and tripped over a large root. His briefcase spilled open, papers fluttering all around him. He dazedly shoved them back into the briefcase, muttering several curses to himself.

“Hand over those papers, old man!” another voice snarled.

The other man was dressed in a lava-red uniform, a stylized ‘M’ emblazoned across his chest. His hood had two strange horns on top. Milo stared at him, wondering why someone would choose to wear a thick red onesie in Hoenn’s tropical climate.

Diogee growled menacingly, only backing off when Milo gestured for him to stand down until they figured out what happened.

“What’s going on here?” Melissa asked.

“He’s trying to rob me!” the businessman shouted. “I swear, all I did was stop to take pictures of a Shroomish-I’ve always liked that Pokémon, you see-and Hoodie there jumped me and tried to steal my documents!”

“How many times have I told you to quit calling me Hoodie? It’s Ignacio! I-G-N-A-C-I-O!”

His protests went ignored as the group collected all the stray papers and put them back into the suitcase.

“Thank you, children,” the businessman gasped breathlessly. “I’m just gonna be going now and-“

Ignacio scowled. “You aren’t going anywhere! Hand over those papers or face the wrath of Team Magma!”

He posed dramatically, which would’ve looked a lot more threatening if he’d chosen a target without knowledge of meme culture.

Ignacio released a Zigzagoon and Koffing. “You’ve trampled on Team Magma’s dreams, and that’s unforgivable! For I am the Magma Grunt Ignacio who stands for humanity’s brighter tomorrow! In the name of Groudon, I shall incinerate you!”

“Aren’t you supposed to be saying love and justice or something?” Melissa asked.

“I wanted to, but it was copyrighted,” Ignacio admitted. “Seriously, I’m not a monster. I respect copyright law.”

“Whatever. I’ll sit this one out, boys,” Melissa said, dragging the businessman out of the way. “While you kick his butt, I’ll be organizing my photos.”

“I don’t remember you taking photos,” Zack said.

Melissa smirked. “I work in mysterious ways.”

“Enough babbling!” Ignacio sneered. “You fools will know the wrath of the 27th ranked Magma goon!”

“That’s supposed to be a bragging point?” Zack scoffed as he sent out Treecko.

Treecko chewed on his stick placidly as he sized up his opponents. Diogee moved into position, eyes fixated on Koffing.

Living near Mt. Chimney had long acquainted Milo and Diogee with the local Pokémon and their habits. Machop liked to test their strength by weightlifting Geodude, and one should never disturb their contests unless they wanted 44.1 pounds of living rock hurtled at them. Numel preferred sand baths, and Torkoal could only distinguish between light and dark.

On the Murphy Ranch, they sometimes had to announce the Purple Protocol in the event of a Koffing wandering onto the property. Its smoke and poisonous gas was harmful to the developing lungs of young humans and Absol, so all minors were to stay inside until the adults had gotten rid of the smoke and contained the Koffing until it could be relocated.

And it had the only type advantage on the current battlefield.

This was gonna be interesting.

“Create a Smokescreen cover!” Ignacio ordered. “Zigzagoon, Quick Attack on Treecko!”

Black gas spewed out of Koffing’s pores, obscuring it from view. Treecko braced himself, eyes trained on the smoke.

There was a slight rustle in the bushes behind Treecko, and a blurred shape shot out.

“Look out!” Zack yelled.

Zigzagoon knocked Treecko off-balance, though Treecko managed to dislodge it with a Pound. Soon the two were engaged in a high-speed Quick Attack fight.

Meanwhile, Milo and Diogee were trying to locate Koffing inside all the black haze with no luck.

Ignacio smirked. “Use Sludge!”

“Diogee, watch out!” Milo warned, but it was too late. Diogee’s eyes were covered in an inky material. Rearing back on his hind legs, Diogee unleashed several Cut attacks in random directions. One of them hit Koffing in the middle of its skull pattern, and another clipped Treecko’s tail. Zigzagoon emerged unscathed, though it panted heavily from exertion.  

A pile of splintered wood and apples crashed to the ground. There were some indignant squawks from bird Pokémon above, but none of them came down to disrupt the battle.

Zack snapped his fingers. “Use Mega Drain on Zigzagoon and get your strength back,” he said.

Zigzagoon was too dazed to follow Ignacio’s instructions to dodge, and a bright green glow lit up its body. The energy flowed into Treecko’s fingertips, rejuvenating him instantly.

“Great! Now grab those apples and stuff ‘em into Koffing’s pores!” Zack exclaimed.

Upon hearing his command, Melissa stuffed her unfinished scrapbook into her bag and hauled the businessman to his feet. “Zack, you do realize-“

Zack had a gleam in his eye.

“Uh, Melissa, I think your battle style’s rubbing off on him,” Milo said awkwardly.

Treecko grabbed a handful of apples and weaved around Koffing, easily outmaneuvering the Poison-type. Within minutes, Koffing’s pores were plugged, Treecko dusting his hands triumphantly.

“C’mon, blow those apples out!” Ignacio screeched.

Koffing groaned, eyes squeezed shut as it tried to blow the apples out. But Treecko had jammed them tightly, and only minuscule amounts of gas leaked into the air. With one last inhale, a glowing Koffing dropped into Treecko’s arms.

Treecko blinked for a moment, then tossed Koffing at Zack and hid behind Melissa, who backed away slowly.

“ACK!” Zack screamed and tossed the Poison-type at Milo.

“It’s using Self-Destruct!” Milo yelped, striking Koffing with a two-handed serve that would’ve made a professional volleyball player proud.

The Koffing landed in the businessman’s arms. The man paled immediately. “GlorytoArceusinthehighest,” he muttered a prayer rapidly in some ancient language Milo wasn’t even sure existed in their dimension.

“Quit being a baby!” Melissa snapped, yanking Koffing out of his arms and hurling it at Ignacio’s face.

But since Melissa was Melissa, she only managed to toss it one foot.

Koffing unceremoniously fell to the ground, its glow almost blinding.

“Diogee, follow my voice!” Milo yelled, grabbing Diogee’s horn once he was close enough and guiding him out of the blast radius.

“COWARDS!” Ignacio shook his fist as everyone fled the immediate vicinity. “WE IN TEAM MAGMA ALWAYS STAND OUR GROUND! FOR WE ARE PILLARS OF HUMANITY, UNYIELDING IN RESOLVE AND PUTTING OUR FOOT DOWN ON ALL MATTERS AND CRUSHING THOSE WHO OPPOSE US!”

“We should put him and Patchy in a room together,” Melissa remarked. “Who needs primetime television when you’ve got them?”

“You might want to reconsider your foot position,” Milo called to Ignacio.

Ignacio glanced down, his eyes widening to comical proportions.

“Well, crud.”

Koffing exploded in a glorious blaze of white light.

“Don’t worry,” Melissa told the trembling businessman, who seemed convinced that he would be arrested for environmental disturbances and manslaughter. “It’s just his pride that didn’t survive.”

AN: Ghost of Maiden’s Peak took place in Kanto, not Johto, but they share the same landmass so what the hey.

Using Koffing as a beach ball is ill-advised.

And now Team Magma is on the scene! Things are picking up!