#if im gonna see people get mad about stuff on the tl id rather it be about real shit

[juice-enjoyer]

being on tumblr more and seeing literally no discourse has made me realize

1. how much I need to do a serious purge of my twitter timeline

2. how fucking irritating my twitter tl is

[elkkiel]

Same anon, thank you for clarifying! I know booktok gets a lot of hate for "romanticizing abuse" so when i see booktok hate im like.. is this unfair demonization of women for daring to like things that arent "pure"/thinking women are too dumb to know the abuse fantasies arent okay in real life/saying it will teach kids who arent old enough to read it to begin with that abuse is okay OR is it actual fair criticism because yeah the discourse gets really intense about non-issues and honestly becomes downright misogynistic. Frankly if you like 50 Shades or whatever the most fucked up fantasy you can think of is (even stuff that would be harmful paraphilias in real life tbh) BUT recognize its bad in real life and keep it purely in fiction/consensual roleplay then you do you im much more concerned about real life abuse. I know thats Controversial and all but id rather direct my anger towards things that will actually prevent abuse/help survivors and know getting mad at fiction oftentimes just hurts survivors who use it to cope with trauma

Absolutely! And even then, when I say I "hate" booktok, it's more so just criticism (and personal distaste based on my own trauma/relationship experiences) rather than actual vitriol. At the end of the day, it's just horny people doing horny things and it's really none of my business what people are into. I think booktok can perpetuates harmful rhetoric about sexual and gender roles, BUT in the same breath I think your point about demonizing women's interests is important too.

You can't do shit as a woman, especially in regards to sexuality. If you like straight vanilla erotica, you're boring and basic. But if you're into more "intense" fantasy, you're brainwashed 100% of the time and you don't actually know what you want. While I personally believe that the booktok crit is warranted, it's also unfair to say that every booktok enjoyer is stuck in some forced submission tradwife fantasy just waiting to be abused for love. It's similar rhetoric to "she should have known better" or "she really wants it deep down" and that's gross to make that blanket assumption.

It's one thing to get your rocks off to mediocre smut with questionable kink etiquette (again, side-eyeing 50 Shades as an example of the potentially harmful depiction of kink). It's another to then bring those ideas into real world practices where someone could get hurt. When we talk about things like this, it's really important to keep it in perspective and focus on the actual potential harm. Y'know, rather than demonizing the people consuming this kind of content. AND to mind your own business re: ykinmkato / how people can positively interact with that kind of media to cope/heal.

tl;dr a lot of the common romance tropes in spicy booktok can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and expectations surrounding love and sexuality. however, I'm not gonna yuck your yum as long as you're being safe in real life.

and really, as a major omegaverse enjoyer, I'd be a little hypocritical if I totally denounced shitty alpha male romances as inherently bad or dangerous lol. can they get toxic? absolutely. BUT it's also a fantasy that can be really fun and enjoyable if kept in a fantasy perspective.