#if i was jaiden id be losing it right now

[lycheefruiit]

'I hope my thoughts can keep up with me'

'I think i'm hallucinating - I think i'm seeing things'

'silly side affects y'know?'

[thefanficmonster]

Falling Faceless

@itsminniekat

Corpse Husband x Reader (female) 

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Some crushes don’t need anything visual to exist. Appearance is irrelevant when you know the true beauty of a soul and mind. Or basically, Reader and Corpse could not care less what the other looks like.

Requested: No

Y/N and Corpse have been friends ever since they began playing Among Us together. They were the ultimate power duo when imposters together, and each other’s angel guardians when both were crewmates. They had a silent pact to not kill the other if they were imposter and the other wasn’t. They promised not to snitch on each other. They had built a pretty steady system of a friendship.

But, as the whole lobby assumed, that friendship would only last a ‘just friendship’ for so long. The sarcastic comments progressively grew more flirtatious. Corpse got a lot more comfortable playing with people in the meantime, but it was obvious that he was a bit more tense whenever Y/N wasn’t there, which rarely happened. On Y/N’s part, the change was also apparent. She used to have to be begged to play Among Us. She didn’t understand the hype of the game, seeing as how the concept was old and just remade and redesigned. Now, after meeting Corpse, she began being the first in the lobby, often initiating the game herself, almost forgetting to invite anyone but Corpse in the process.

The Peanut Gallery, aka the rest of the players just stood aside and listened to the romantic comedy unfold in front of them. They had a title for it too: “Falling Faceless”. The term was formed after a lot of discussion in a discord call which Y/N and Corpse were not invited to.

Explanation: Falling Faceless - Falling in love with someone whose face you’ve never seen, therefore they’re faceless to you.

That’s one of the things her and Corpse had in common. They were both faceless to their audience. Y/N was a gamer and also helped out Jaiden, James and Adam with their animations every now and then. She covered songs and made remixes of existing tunes - all things she never had to reveal her face for.

Corpse was attracted almost immediately - like a moth to light. The faceless rep, the cool song remixes, sweet and kind personality, intelligence, positivity...he could go on. He never denied his feelings in front of himself but he was prepared to deny it to his grave in front of anyone else.

Y/N was different. Her attraction grew gradually. From the tiny details he remembered about her and brought up, to the jokes that never failed to make her laugh, she was just so whipped by him without even noticing. When the realization began to creep in, she was low-key terrified. She actually avoided playing Among Us for two full days just because she thought it would make her emotions cool down.

While he was ready to embrace his feelings, she was doing everything she could to push them away.

She threw herself into work, surprising her animators by finishing her animation parts far before the deadlines. Dropping a few covers a week and playing Among Us as little as she could without drawing any suspicion.

One day, in the middle of editing the footage of her playthrough of the game Neversong, her phone started blowing up with notifications. She had a strict ‘no texting while working’ rule, so she ignored it, turning the device on its screen and pushing it further than an arm’s reach away in case she got tempted.

She was doing a fairly good job blocking out the hurricane of notifications when her ringtone sliced through the bubble of focus she had built around herself. She straightened and reached for her phone, promising herself she wouldn’t take longer than necessary. 

That promise was thrown out the window the second she read the called ID. Corpse, written down as Lil Corpsy in her contacts, was calling.

“Have you watched the video yet?” he asked without even greeting her

Baffled, it took her about three seconds to reply, “What video?”

“So you haven’t.” He sighed, “My face reveal. Go watch it.”

The line went dead before she could even completely comprehend what he had said. Work all but forgotten, her finger tips hovered above the screen, hesitant about tapping the YouTube icon.

This isn’t right, Y/N. She told herself.

“Hey?” He picked up her call-back before the first ring was even over.   

“I still haven’t watched the video. But that can wait.“ She fussed, now up from her chair, pacing around her office. “I’m calling to tell you the most terrifying thing that has happened to me. I made a friend. He’s great. The most amazing human being ever. We make a great team. I love him. It took me a while to realize that I love love him. And it’s scary, cause it feels like I’m walking on thin ice of losing him if he finds out. Well, now he’s letting me on to what he looks like, I might as well let him on what my mess of a brain looks like. And now that I’ve done that, I also wanna mention that I’ve changed my mind. I’m not gonna watch the video. It will change nothing but his view count. I will still like him the same. So why bother watching him talk to a camera when I can listen to him talking to me, right?“ She breathed heavily and shakily, sinking to the floor despite having her chair to sit in. She was distressed and felt like the equivalent of a deflated balloon. But compared to the feeling of a balloon ready to explode, she was feeling great. “That was probably too fast to understand, but I’m not repeating it.”

The chuckle that reached her made her even more flustered, “There is no video, Y/N. I just needed you to go to my channel. But, I too have changed my mind.”

He hung up a second time, leaving her with mixed emotions. The uncertainty of weather she was just rejected or her feelings were being humored was killing her, bringing her to a brink of tearing up. Just as the first tear slid down her cheek, her phone rang. However, this time, the ringtone was different. It was a Facetime. From him.

Without realizing that this wasn’t going to be only his face reveal, but hers too, she picked up.

Suddenly, they were no longer falling faceless. They were just falling. Falling in each other’s eyes. Falling in love. Not all over again, but deeper. Deeper into the emotions that left them with no sleep. The emotions they both dealt so differently with.

“You were wrong, this will change something.” He spoke, “The girl in my dreams, the one I’ve been in love with since day one, is now not only a voice in my head. She’s real.”

“You’re real, too.” She chuckled, looking at the face she never thought she’d see. “This is real, isn’t it?”

“It’s always been real, Y/N. We just now have faces.” He laughed.

For the first time she not only heard, but saw the laugh, finding it as adorable as day one. 

[tslasvegas]

Episode 3: “UGH just rename Luxor to Loser” - Xavier

Well... that takes care of the Timmy problem... Love Timmy... Just didn’t know how our dynamic would be cus he was runner-up to the last survivor game I played which I won. Hm... Well...

That went well. There's nothing like a live video tribal to get people together. and stephen didn't react too badly. but i know now he won't work with me moving forward

I’m sorry I’m terrible at confessionals... So things are going well, I think we have a decent tribe but it is too soon to tell. I’m not a huge fan of creative challenges, at least from my previous game, I guess we will see how that goes. Most of the guys seem nice, still trying to feel everyone out.`

A 4-2 vote off is interesting. Someone is on the bottom for sure. Also, this next challenge is a creative challenge and when I do these solo I usually do really well. Hopefully I can channel that energy into a win for us here because two tribes are going to tribal. We’ll be down to 17 after this, so I’m not sure if we’d go into a tribe swap yet? Maybe 2 tribes of 8 with one person sitting out? 

Oh hot dang, two tribes are going to tribal next time. Probably going to be us :( now it is time to make alliance chats!

....five seconds later

I suspect that after this double vote out that there will be a tribe swap. I hope I end up with Mo and Jaiden at least.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/17NPxKO_TKgqjNqsaWlbmlL0jgU36Aygi/view?usp=drivesdk

I really like this challenge. I feel confident about it but at the same time nervous that 2 tribes will be going to tribal. I really hope my tribe wins this one since I still don't know how the tribe feels about me. Wish me luck guys!

My tribe is not going to win this immunity challenge. Our nightclub is due just hours away and we have little nothing done. I am going to have to scramble soon.....I did nothing to help my tribe with the challenge, so if it is me that goes, I would understand 

....five seconds later

Honestly, I want to keep Jaiden and Mo around because I feel closer with them than anyone else. I want to keep Kailyn around because she seems to make time for challenges. Everyone else I am okay with going home, Ben hasn't really done anything soooooo maybe him? Oof

If we lose, then it's 2/3rds my fault and 1/3 Stephen. We better not be on the chopping block if we do lose. This is a two person Tribe as of now. Bobby Jon and Stephenie.

...five seconds later

UGH just rename Luxor to Loser

Second we lose Ben finally responded to my pm’s..... hm..... alright....

Y’all rlly won with a PowerPoint SKDJDJSKLALALL

Some of these guys have an excuse for not giving input into the challenge. Some do not. If I go home because some americans could be bothered doing some base level discussion, ill be annoyed. If I go home because a tribe threw a challenge because they thought id be an easy vote, ill be pissed.

All that hard work that went into this challenge really paid off! We scored the best and don’t have to attend tribal!! Which is absolutely exciting! Andrew told me he wanted to work together which is rad. Livingston and I want to work together which is radder. And Joey and i want to work together which is raddest. I haven’t spoken too much with Jeff lately even though we talked quite a bit early on. Pat and I speak occasionally. Stephanie and I didn’t really speak at all until recently but we’ve gotten into a good groove the last few days. I’m feeling pretty good about this game so far. I hope there’s no tribal swap or anything right away.

So when I get my chip total I'm gonna update Keegan. He is currently at a soap making class but I want him to know I am serious about working with him in this game and I think this is a good gesture. - keegan has let me know he has 4 chips and is willing to pool them over to me when we have enough so that we can unlock the store. I let him know I am okay with doing the same thing to him, whichever. But yes this is looking HOT for me. - "what's in the store?" | all i can really assume is advantages. we need 10 chips to unlock it. This is very similar to the Unnamed Season but the betting cap gives us more control. At this point, I don't think anyone can mathematically unlock without pooling chips. Keegan and I just need 1 more chip between us. Let's just hope we aren't separated by a swap or some shit. I am hoping for a bit more time on this amazing tribe to get that set up so I have a good idea of what the store holds.

Some of these guys have an excuse for not giving input into the challenge. Some do not. If I go home because some americans could be bothered doing some base level discussion, ill be annoyed. If I go home because a tribe threw a challenge because they thought id be an easy vote, ill be pissed.

We lost again!?!?!?!?!??! I am so surprised? Nah I'm kidding, but I don't care. I don't blame our team for losing because 3/5 of us were panicking because our president could be a cheetoh. I'm voting Stephen tonight, I hope the others follow suit. It SHOULD be simple, but 9 hours is a long time for Survivor; and if he knows it's him then might run around and create some chaos - which would be funny.

Rachael (love her she’s probably who I’m closest with along with DeNara and Kailyn) is not being subtle about the fact that she either has a pre-existing friendship with Ben or is currently aligned with Ben. Because Ben, from my knowledge has not been social with anyone, nor has he been super active and in our alliance chat with Kailyn, Rachael seems uncomfortable with the fact that Ben is said to be the vote and is saying she would prefer someone else to go. But like c’mon you can’t deny he hasn’t been social, and even if I had a friendship with somebody before a game, if they aren’t active I’m voting them out. Also I lied to my tribe a couple times this round because I’m lazy.

UGH. We LOST the challenge!!! And it wasn't even close *grumbles angrily* But it's okay. I'm gonna have to work my pussy out to this entire tribe to make them keep me around! I feel pretty good about this, I believe the target is leaning towards Ben but we'll have to wait and see. I don't think it's possible rn but I'm hoping for a swap soon so I can feel a little more re-energized in this game because my tribe has been super quiet lately... I think people will try to move the vote around so I'm going to use my current lack of employment as an opportunity to make myself stay alive on this tribe lmao

These guys are being super boring and either Jake is dumber than i thought, or shadier than i gave him credit for. Xavier might be trying to play me but regardless its doubtful ill stay. John seems to have the most chance of winning out of these four as hes not overplaying. Kevin hasnt spoken to me since the colin vote and it pisses me off that I might be going home after being one of two people that worked on the challenge when kevin was taken off the chopping block immediately for playing jeopardy. i hate this tribe.

....five seconds later

Johns out, Jake too by the sound of it. Time for plan B, which never works but might as well try. Fake idol time.

Oof well the uhh, “obvious friend group” has picked their target and it just so happens to be the only person I’ve made an actual alliance with :/ Poor DeNara. I really didn’t want to have to vote her off this early if I didn’t have to and then the worst part is she didn’t even hear it from me. Nobody is even mentioning game right now and Rachael is acting legitimately surprised to me when I came to her saying “okay this is an easier vote than I thought”.. even tho Ben claimed he had already talked to her..?? Idk man I must’ve done something wrong along the way but these people LEGITIMATELY don’t talk to me. My instant reaction is leaning towards being bitter but bitterness doesn’t really get me anywhere :/ I feel kinda.. out of it rn emotionally just because of everything else I have going on so if I seem more reserved tonight at tribal than usual, that’s why. I just hope that I’m not still stuck on that damn mountain rolling my dumbass rock back up only to get knocked back down again. I’m remaining optimistic for the future.. let’s keep winning some challenges mmkay

Okay good news, I shouldn't be leaving. But that being said DeNara, you have goT TO PULL. YOURSELF. TOGETHER. She's packing her bags and from my knowledge she's going to be fine tonight. Hopefully it'll be Ben who's going but DeNara giving up like this isn't helPING. 

....five seconds later

Also I am in two alliances which is cool I guess.

Oops....... and now I'm controlling this vote I think :) It feels good. I don't know what my plan is !! I'm lying to everyone. I basically put myself in a position to be the 4th person in both votes and I love it so much. I keep telling ppl I'm an emotional mess and I think I'll milk that because SOMEONE is going to get betrayed tonight... love that for me. Rachael, Nik, and Ben want to vote out DeNara Mo, Kailyn, and DeNara want to vote out Ben And tbh I would prefer Rachael or Nik!! Since neither of those things are happening I guess it's up to me to decide which way I wanna swing... I hate/love myself for this. I think there are good cases for both people to leave, because I think that getting rid of DeNara strengthens bonds I never had with Rachael and co. while getting rid of Ben just makes me their enemy. Honestly I am starting to lean towards getting rid of DeNara for that sole purpose alone. It'll be messy for sure. Ben provides NOTHING to the game right now and I hate the fact that he announced in his intro that he's just here to backstab people... but villains don't win unless they're sitting next to another villain. He's the goat to me and Rachael right now, but pretty homos like me always win xx I might regret this decision down the road but HOPEFULLY whichever side I take will pay me back in protection down the line. I think I have the charm to smooth shit over w Kailyn and Mo but its up for determination. I think that I have the finesse to beat Rachael in a vote, too, but I don't want to put her back up against the wall just yet..... ;) Anyways... I hope this isn't my last confessional. I wasn't having fun until I found my place. Let's get it on.

It is me or Ben tonight. Guess we will find out who...

[survivingjapan]

EPISODE 5 “Can’t we just bring the crazy 15 year old in? Why is that so hard?” - Sarah

The internal struggle is real rn. Do I throw Alex under the bus and secure my safety? Or do I try to sit back and hope a new target emerges?

I don't know how many people know this, but I try to write a big piece of bullshit before every tribal to release if I'm the one voted out. Here's the one from tonight.... First of all I just want to say thank you to the hosts and to my fellow competitors. Now I'm going to expose some snakes. (Please don't hate me people, I just want to blow the game up while I'm leaving). -Linus, Alex, and Tommy are in an alliance -Jonathan HATES Richie and Alex -Jaiden has told me that he has an idol -Crow, Sarah, and Brian have an alliance -Of the 3 mentioned above, Crow and Sarah have a F2 -Tommy is by far playing the best strategic game -Junior is playing an extremely well social game -Brian is connected to the heroes on MANY levels and he'll flip to them at a tribe swap -Linus also has a good social game -Jaiden is messy as fuck

hi my name is im fucked how r u?

BIIIIIITCH I'M GOING FOR MY OTTNN5 EDGIC I'M NOT FUCKING AROUND RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!! (but hopefully i at least get a CPM) The vote was 4 votes Alex. 4 votes Kage. 1 vote ME. 1 vote tommy. 1 vote Jon. theres a tie, brian gets the rock drawn and my stupid ass was like wait my names not on the list and that alone should make me a hero for being an honest bitch but then redo and jaiden leaves and bam i ERUPT.  in the main chat i'm like YO WHO VOTED WHO LETS GET TO THE BOTTOM OF IT!!! Jon/Crow/Junior all say they voted for alex, Linus says he voted for Kage and I say i voted for kage so thats 5/11 votes accounted for and i cant believe anyone actually listened to me and revealed their vote in the tribal chat lmao WILD i was completely left out of this vote and everything thats been happening on this tribe so its clear im on the bottom and with my name being thrown around at this vote whether i was actually a possible target or a decoy that shit isnt okay im not in the long term plans for ANYONE on this tribe so i have nothing to lose worst case scenario i put a big target on my back and i go out next and if that happens at least i didnt go out as a useless pawn in anyones game and its because i did something but what im hoping is to gain information (which i did because i found out how everyone voted within an hour after tribal) and 2. i wanted chaos so everyones mad at someone like kage voting jon was a big win bc that furthered their fight thats been alive since day 1 after that i went on a bit of a pity tour where i went to everyone and like was like "i feel so alone and isolated and no one trusts me and i just feel like i havent done anything to prove that you shouldnt trust me i just want to be included" just trying to make people feel bad lmao im so worked up its been 2 hours since tribal and i literally havent stopped ive been at a 100 out of 10 with everyone and im going to need to cool down and lay low but while i have momentum i caaaaant just sit around and do nothing so i guess we'll see what consequences my outbursts have had???? 

idk how to explain what just happened

I've wrote myself a hit list of people who ARE going home before me.... Jonathan Richie Linus Alex Tommy Brian

So after a few hours of info gathering I think I have bits and pieces of what happened in that last vote.... So the alliance of 7 (Myself, Jonathan, Sarah, Tommy, Brian, Jaiden, & Junior) were supposed to vote for Alex. However, Jaiden, being bored with the game or feeling outcast at the bottom decides that this is merely a ploy to get us to throwaway our votes. Then, he approaches various people, which I know to be Brian, Linus, and Junior (at least) about the possibility of still voting Kage. Whether this was to insight chaos or division for entertainment or strategy, I don't know.... Meanwhile, Alex is feeling on the outs as he's a smart player and observed it so he threw a vote at Tommy. Whether this was because he knew it would force the vote to tie or simply because he didn't like Tommy and wanted to give him a parting gift, I also don't know.... Jonathan, Tommy, myself, and Sarah stuck to the plan to vote out Alex (however, Sarah doesn't want to expose her vote in public and cause a confrontation between her and Junior considering Junior lied about his vote too....) Kage voted Jonathan in the same regard that Alex did. (Again, I don't know if it was planned or not or if either had connections to Jaiden's plans, but they both threw away their votes despite them being clear targets.....sketch....) Which means that someone threw a vote at Richie and is not fessing up about it. Richie voted Kage because I'm sure that's what everyone told him to do (as we were supposed to) and he was just alone. The vote for Richie, in my opinion, was likely Jaiden, given his rep for paranoia and throwing votes away to avoid rocks/idol plays (ironic, huh?) and that Junior voted for Kage as a part of Jaiden's plan considering there's a strong possibility that him and Linus are connected.... So right now, I trust Tommy, Jonathan, Alex, Sarah (but I'm also a little worried as to why she doesn't want to tell the truth to everyone....) and honestly, still Brian because I can relate to his position.....I want to build trust with Richie but we're not there quite yet. My targets would be Kage and Junior as of now. Kage just....just needs to go and Junior is a massive rat with a few too many strings on this tribe. Either or, I don't care which one goes first.... Or I'm totally wrong and still aligning myself with rats =)

I got REALLY lucky yesterday, however I also lost my closest ally in the process.  And I told him I would slay the rest of this game for him, so I must avenge Jaiden (who I will confessional-ize about all the time!).  I had some major damage control and I just pushed over and over again that I voted Kage, the truth, so that people would trust me more.  I hope they do still trust me, and I do think they realize that I'm still useful to most of them.  I grew insanely close to Richie after that happened, and the two of us will most definitely be working together.  Linus still trusts me, and I think Alex might still trust me to an extent.  Kage and I are probably done which is fine.  Junior is a snake or so I think.  Tommy doesn't not trust me, he just probably won't trust me as much.  But he did know about the Kage vote, so I didn't completely shock him.  Sarah and Crow need me, I think.  Jonathan needs me.  I hope my thoughts on all this are right djskahsd.

OK LISTEN THE FUCK UP HUNTIES!! IM ABOUT TO SPILL ALL THE GOOD TEA AND HONESTLY I WOULD HAVE DONE IT ON A VIDEO BUT MY PHONE! IS A POS AND apparently i have too many videos already? ANYWAYS SO I HAVENT MADE A CONFESSIONAL AND WEVE GONE TO TRIBAL COUNCIL THREE TIMES VILLAINS ARE A MESS HONESTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so the first vote was between brian and pat and then i messaged brian and i was like heheh i wannt to keep u so crow and i went around talking to ppl to see how they felt (crow and i didnt plan this out btw i guess we both just wanted to keep him?) SO THEN PAT WENT HOME! on a 9-3-1 vote ash self voted kage(mess), tommy and pat voted brian and the rest of us voted pat so anyways then WE FUCKING LOSE AGAIN!?!? are these heroes on steroids? idk? anyways! we gotta go to tribal council again and at this point im kinda like ok i feel fine.....AND DO U WANNA KNOW WHY??? crow and brian and I have an alliance jaiden and jr and I have an alliance tommy felt bad about being in minority and not listening to me for the pat vote so we have pledged our f2 together and he is literally the light of my life...i cant tell if he feels the same but boy do i love this boy...hes my ned pt 2 anyways so jonathan decided that he wanted a majority alliance with crow, brian, me, him, jaiden, jr andDD TOMMY !!! LEGIT ALL THE PPL IM ALLIGNED WITH SO IM IN THE FUCKING MIDDLE AHHHH SCREAM SCREAM BITCH THE FUCK CREAM CHEESE SCREAM so that works out ...obv i dont like jaiden or jr bc they fucking suck anyways so we all vote together to vote out ashley ... and kage and richie and linus and alex are just there i heard there have been an alliance with alex, kage, linus and tommy -which tommy doesnt like btw i know jr and linus are a thing richie and alex are prob a thing everyone is connected and tbh i dont really care for any of these players except for tommy...and Id like to add crow to that list but we all know hes a mastermind so ...i aint a dumb bitch SO ANYWAYS NOW ONTO THE THIRD VOTE...WE HAVE MAJORITY AND WE DECIDE TO VOTE OUT ALEX well DOESNT THAT GO ASTRAY jaiden decided to vote out kage, brian voted with him so basically heres how the voting went (hopefully im correct) crow-alex jon-alex tommy-alex sarah-alex kage-jon richie-kage brian-kage jaiden-kage linus-kage jr-richie alex-tommy but everyone thot i voted out ....richie..and I KNOW IN THE BOTTOM OF MY FUCKING HEART THAT JR IS LYING!! AND HE WONT ADMIT IT and heres why i know hes lying and hes a snake a rama 1) he put ashleys name out there on the second vote-he got scared it was gonna come to bite him in the ass so he told ppl "hes hearing ashleys name" 2) he has a clear alliance with kage and has been trying to keep him this entire time when its obvious no one likes him !?!? 3) he told kage that ashley went around saying kages name LOL which is funny so now kage hated ashley and they both hated eachother and tbh idrc if jr wants to make stupid obvious moves like this to pit two idiotic players against one another but hey ! like ...as long as u aint trying ur shit with me then idfc about u bitch 4) he voted richie and hes lying...like fucking stop? so anyways BECAUSE JAIDEN AND JR ARE UGLY AF INSIDE AND OUT I NOW NEED TO AMEND TIES WITH FUCKING ALEX bc him and i had an agreement of f2 :c so i tell him i voted him and that i didnt want to lie and then he wants a majority alliance with me, crow, brian, linus and richie !!! which im down for like bitch im not gonna turn down an alliance!?! but i will tell tommy about this bc i like that alex and tommy both dont like eachother hehe but alex is def playing middle but ill just let him think hes being slick BUT ANYWAYS I WAS BORED AT 1 AM LAST NIGHT SO GUESS WHAT I DECIDED TO DO ... look for the idol... so it went a little something like this me: josh i know ur online LET ME SEARCH FOR IDOL josh: yes hello wanna search me: YES josh: ok! me: josh pls give me an idol pls josh *crickets* josh: Congratulations! You have found the Modoru idol. This is a special idol with special powers. This idol, when played, will restart the round to before the last immunity challenge, halting the tribal council, resulting in no elimination from the game. The immunity challenge will be reconducted, and the game will continue as normal. It is important to note that is idol must be played before the votes are read, at the same time as a normal idol. If any other idol is played in addition to this idol, it shall be returned to it’s owner. me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HAVE A FUCKING FISH IDOL anyways ya so thats what u missed on glee

The Heroes showing up to slay the villains in the challenge honestly I dont know whats my more favorite thing, winning immunity or watching the villains descend into madness

We won immunity again out of luck..... woopdy freakin doo. I feel kinda bad for the heroes because the Villains are having all the FUN and I wanna be included in on the fun, but I do have to keep reminding myself that no matter how eager I am, it's good that I've been immune these few times because, eventually, if I make it there, I'll have to go to every single tribal council, and knowing how horrific I am under pressure when it comes to individual immunities, I probably won't win many of those. But one good thing did come out of this round, and it's the fact that Kendall painted a bigger target on her back if we were to go to tribal, and it's to get her the fuck out of here. I know she's a strong player, and taking this opportunity to take her out, without even cutting the legs off of her body (and by that I mean taking out Ruthie first, so she feels safe and then stabbing her in the throat), but since Kendall is making it so easy to just target her dumb ass, I guess that'll work too and maybe I can now look into using Ruthie as an asset in this game, especially since she's so nice, she seems really loyal and doesn't have many social skills going around according to what I'm hearing from the tribe. Maybe it's time to start building that final relationship in our tribe, so I can use it in case we swap tomorrow, which I'm highly speculating

I also think it's about that time where I start picking up those strong relationships with those Villains like I had night one, especially if we're swapping tomorrow. I want to keep conversations raw and not too deep. Like a "Good Luck at tribal" and see if it'll spark anything. I've been consistently talking to Tommy, Linus and Crow, but I also know Tommy has been having consistent conversations with members of our tribe, and honestly, there's a chance I might slip this information to Crow to see if he can take out Tommy, especially because he's a winner. OMG THIS CONFESSIONAL JUST GAVE ME A BRILLIANT IDEA. Let's see if I can low-key just plant the seed to get him the fuck out of here and see what's up :)

Drew and Alex C. hosting a main season TOGETHER during Japan? Mood. This is from after me winning the duel. Oops forgetting to submit it from last round

BY THE MOTHERFUCKING GRACE OF JESUS CHRIST I SOMEHOW GOT THE IDOL CLUE WITH AN 8% CHANCE OF IT POTENTIALLY GOING TO ME (ya know.... 1/12 #math). I know it's in the meadow based off of the clue, and lucky for me I already searched there once, so I've got a 1/3 shot of finding it........ AND I FUCK IT THE FUCK UP. Essentially I have two options here, either go to one of my closest allies (Steffen or Trace) to search for the idol as well in the space I told them to, and then they hopefully will it over to me, OR I just wait until next round and HOPE I'm still on Heroes beach (despite the high speculation of a swap), and just hope that I can search again to better my odds. I decided there's no time like the present, so I run to Steffen and Trace, but Steffen answers first, so lucky for Steffen, and I tell him the predicament, and he goes to look for the idol and nada. Now at this point, I just gotta wait it out because I think there's a decent chance we won't be swapping, and that would be incredible for my game because then I can actually go for it now and find out if it has been found or not. I'm getting the feeling that at the fifth round of this game, either someone got a secret idol clue during their search (which is very possible) or that someone got DUMB lucky. Either way, I'm keeping optimistic at this point and praying that shit goes my way. ~Cheers to not a swap~

Also, fucking Tommy keeps messaging me about swapping tribes and wanting to abandon ship with the villains because it's essentially him and Kage vs everyone else. I'm not really sure if this is true, especially because he has fucking won this game before, but I'm going to assume, based on what's been told to me, that it is actually Tommy and Kage vs the tribe, and I think it'll be an interesting tribal tonight, with it being likely that Kage goes home. On a totally different note, I decided to try to utilize my relationship with Crow on the villains tribe, and let him know that A LOT of Heroes have been getting messages from Tommy nonstop, and as much as I think he's nice, the second I found out about Tommy messaging ALL the heroes, and not just me, it made me realize that I don't really think I can trust him and that he's gotta go. I wonder if Crow is going to be taking my advice, or maybe cutting the legs off of Tommy, but Tommy can be a huge tool for me that I can use against the Villains if I end up on a swapped tribe that could fuck me over in numbers, but with Tommy, I've got a shot. As of now, I think Kage is going from what Tommy told me, which means that Tommy is likely next on the chopping block, and he's been talking to me A LOT about mutinying, but I'm not really sure he can do that, but if he can, and he chooses to, there probably won't be much stopping me from booting him out of our tribe almost immediately. We'll see how tonight goes because I'm HIGHLY skeptical about it, but I've got faith that we're not swapping because our tribe declared that Dom is competing in this duel for our tribe, and idk if the hosts are fucking with us or not, but if they are, then kudos to them because I don't know what to think at this point

https://youtu.be/6yiILcktIqo

[survivorcutthroat]

Episode 1: “There’s a 50 year old playing this game.” - Zack (Part 2)

*shocker* Nehe blew it. Big. 

 Good news? We got Seamus to join us + I think there's a very tentative plan in motion right now....Seamus told Nehe that Zack and Amir are close so if me/him/Nehe and Dustin vote together we have instant majority and we can boot Zack  like I have been wanting to.... 

But of course, I can't trust Seamus yet as he is yet to tell this info directly to me - just to Nehe. I'll work on that... 

But for now I'll let Nehe do the scheming for the both of us so that if it backfires, the bullet hits him harder than me. =)

Stevie is now on our tribe, as we have lost immunity. I'm selling him on the idea of "Ali is the guy here we all look to for guidance" so that he wants Ali gone. I've been gunning for Ali while having an alliance with him since day one. Gotta cut throats before throats cut you. 

This is so uglyyy omg. Voting Sherry was a huge mistake, however, we had no idea what the vote would entail. It could have been voting someone to redemption island for all we know. Sherry had to complete a series of puzzles, and they're some of the worst puzzles I've ever seen. Stevie and Seamus are fucking freaks. Then this twist comes and they have to vote at our tribal too. And freaking Stevie chooses my tribe 

 I hate Stevie and my relationship with him isn't very good. I prefer Seamus because I think he would have my back. I don't feel safe, but I have Ali and Bodhi. Dom might help me, but he hasn't really talked to me since the first day. Sherry and I don't talk to, and she is super busy. My concerns are that Sherry might have something for doing the challenge, and Stevie might try to stir the pot. Kill me, Tommy help me out god. I have no idea why Eddie hates me, he's trying to rig against me. This cast is meh no wonder I'm on it. 

 Btw, I came to a realization that I should consider not dating, liking, crushing, or doing anything with another guy they are disgusting and fakes and ugly. I'm so done with them. 

 Me: let me be more social! 

also me: doesn't talk to people on my tribe

Okay I made a decision. I'm gonna stick to my guns. I am not letting nehe or crow leave and im not compromising. I know I've been in denial but it's time to face the facts. My tribe is going to tribal. I'm going to make sure nehe doesn't go. I think he'll 100% be a loyal ally. He so sweet and I like him and I have a feeling he's not gonna hit it off with a lot of people. 

Second, I truly truly hope crow doesn't go. I love him as a person he's literally my husband but like, I'm not gonna throw my game away for him. If he's the one going then he's the one going. I need to make sure me and nehe are safe over him because I can control nehe more than I can control crow. If crow does go, then me and nehe are enough to force a tie if we go to tribal again. 

Third, is zack. Zack and I have a long history and I've known him for 2 years. Taking him out isn't bad for my game but I genuinely would be so bad because I love him as a person so I really really don't want to. 

Fourth is Dustin, nice kid, pretty hot lowkey, but he can go. I really do like him as a person but uhhhgg 

Zack just confirmed he's with Dustin. ZAXK WANTS ME HIM AND DUSTIN TO ALIGN. I WASNT MEANT FOR THIS FUCKING GAME. THIS IS Not what I want. I think crow is gonna be the one to go. I am SO sad. I DONT WVEN KNOW IF I TRUST ZACK OR DUSTIN. WHAT IF IM BEING PLAYED? I WANT TO FUCKING SCREAM. How am I suppose to talk to dustin when he never fuckin replies? Maybe I should just vote myself out and be lucky. If I'm with Zack/Dustin I'm at the bottom cuz they're close. If I'm with nehe and crow I'm at the top cuz they're both close to me. I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm going to keep my fucking mouth shut and wait for zack and Dustin to campaign to nehe and wait to see what crow wants to do. I need to like be patient and wait. That's what I need to do

We are more than halfway through round one and I am loving this game!! When it started and I saw the cast reveal i almost immediately quit because i saw Jaiden and Sid and i needed to GO, but then they weren't on my tribe so it was fine. I really like my tribe! Me and Tommy have always gotten along, although we don't have much playing experience together. Cole and I have a weird relationship in games that I don't fully understand but this time around I am liking it. I like Abel, and Matt is a cool dude. i really like that all of us searched for the idol because otherwise I probably wouldn't have searched and missed the potential opportunity. In terms of the other people in the cast, I LOVE LIANA!!!! One of my faves, so happy she is here! Seamus I get along with well, and surprisingly I have been talking to Bodhi a decent amount. My biggest fear is in this game I don't know how more than half of these people are as players. I know about less than half of the cast and Id on't like that. gonna have to snoop around and ask how these bitches played in their past games.

So walking into this game - I feel pretty decent about the cast. I know certain people for good reasons and some for bad reasons. When I look at the people I see Dustin & Cole, of which as all played BBHell together and on separate occasions flirted with each other. This was my first game from a year ago. I had to unblock Dustin from a year ago. Yikes. 

People are recognizing me from India. "India", "robbed of Switzerland" whatever blah blah blah. Considering I don't play tumblr to often I kinda just like to do me so I play a bit medicore I guess. But they all know me so w/e. 

My tribe is pretty decent. I'm happy. As a tribe we haven't talked but one on one my strongest relations are in this tribe. Sherry is one of my bffs

Oh my, I'm so scared about this game. At least Stevie won the immunity challenge but I feel like I'm missing out on so much gameplay. I feel like there is a alliance(s) that I'm not in. What should I do, I've generally scared. I think people like me personally, but I could be wrong like always. I'm really trying to lay low in this game and I'm hoping people will forget about me for the most part the game. I don't know if I should start a majority alliance in my tribe OR I should get 2 people from each tribe and form a 8 person alliance where we all work together to get rid of people that isn't in the alliance, the nice thing about two tribes losing two members tomorrow is that this alliance could totally happen. The only thing is that this plan would completely backfire on me because I would be playing too hard to fast. I'm so conflicted, if my tribe does up going to tribal, I'm probably going to vote out Matt because I know him the least (I've said this like 7 times jeez). I'm going to try and be lovable in this game and have people think I'm easily manipulated and doing their will so they won't target me. Oh man, this game makes me paranoid.

So pretty much whats going to (hopefully) happen is that Nehe will be hitting the road after taking 4 hours of his life on those puzzles. Yes he didnt quit. But still he was 3 hours behind even placing 2nd. For us to be down to a tribe of 4 its going to rely on comp scores so he has to go. ive talked alot to crow, amir ,and zack and we all seem to get along. however i am suspicious of amir and zacks previous relationship. Hopefully we can all vote together today and send Nehe packing.Oh my, I'm so scared about this game. At least Stevie won the immunity challenge but I feel like I'm missing out on so much gameplay. I feel like there is a alliance(s) that I'm not in. What should I do, I've generally scared. I think people like me personally, but I could be wrong like always. I'm really trying to lay low in this game and I'm hoping people will forget about me for the most part the game. I don't know if I should start a majority alliance in my tribe OR I should get 2 people from each tribe and form a 8 person alliance where we all work together to get rid of people that isn't in the alliance, the nice thing about two tribes losing two members tomorrow is that this alliance could totally happen. The only thing is that this plan would completely backfire on me because I would be playing too hard to fast. I'm so conflicted, if my tribe does up going to tribal, I'm probably going to vote out Matt because I know him the least (I've said this like 7 times jeez). I'm going to try and be lovable in this game and have people think I'm easily manipulated and doing their will so they won't target me. Oh man, this game makes me paranoid.

welp. i'm going to mother fucking tribal. 

my plan? seamus told me nehe and crow said my name.. so nehe and crow can CHOKE. i wanna make an alliance with dustin and amir and vote nehe out hehe. honestly. can all these people choke so i can win. like just give me the win.

This is so ugly. I love Ali so much. Me and Ali have an alliance with Bodhi, but Bodhi does not trust Ali. Sherry is obviously trying to save herself, and why the hell is it catching on? Dom's dumbass is barely here, Stevie shouldn't even be a part of this tribe this twist is rigged. But Bodhi? Like hell man why do you think Sherry is going to be more loyal to us than Ali? We voted for Sherry! Unless he's saying he didn't vote or didn't actually vote. Like Sherry and Stevie i undersrand voting for Ali, but Bodhi? What the hell? We're in an alliance with him do you really think he's going to flip onus now? So stupid these people are so stupid.

Nehe and I are talking, and he's one of the few people in the game I think is absolutely telling me the truth. I want him on my side when a swap hits. Right now my trust is in Amir, Abel, Dom, Sherry, and Nehe. I've got moderate amounts of trust with Crow, Mearl, Tommy, Stevie, Rob, Ali (but im killing him tonight), Seamus, and several other people. I am feeling GOOD about this game if I can make it past this tribal.

I talked to everybody that's originally on my tribe and the vote is split between Sherry and Ali. Bodhi is such a snake. I went on call with Dom who I loved a lot the first night and he told me that Bodhi exposed our alliance to him for no reason. Dom isn't even close to Bodhi. Bodhi is obviously trying to control the vote and doing what is right for him. Fake I knew i never liked him. I do want to work with Dom and Eddie's Breadies is definitely not a thing anymore. 

[12:35:25 PM] Bodhi: Who are you working with on your tribe> 

[12:35:34 PM] Nehe Mehe: lol can you keep a secret? 

[12:35:52 PM] Bodhi: absolutely 

[12:35:55 PM] Nehe Mehe: at the moment all of them cause they all wanna work with me 

[12:35:56 PM] Bodhi: there's no one i'd tell 

then i went and told Amir.

1 hour later:

I'm hella nervous tribal council is coming up in three hours but everything should be fine. Amir settled on voting out Zack and Seamus is all good and so is Crow and I dont know where Dustin is at but yeah he better vote Zack out too. I gotta watch how I play out in the Live tribal portion but I feel like I have a chance to stay but I can tragically still get blindsided.

[2:41 PM] Ali  TAnveer: We need you You're the fun person in the tribe

[2:41:31 PM] Bodhi: I wanted tribal at 5 :'( 

[2:41:40 PM] Ali  TAnveer: I was. Tribal now 

[2:41:46 PM] Ali  TAnveer: Or 5 :( 

[2:42:48 PM] Bodhi: 5 is just better 

[2:44:08 PM] Ali  TAnveer: It is [2:44:15 PM] Ali  TAnveer: I might be out tonight 

Ali has no idea how right he is. He means that he wont be around for tribal, but he won't be around after tribal either.

15 minutes later:

OOPS hahahaha fuck. Ok so Rob wants me to flip on the plan to take out Ali, and he's made good arguments. I'm gonna keep Ali around and do Sherry instead. Sherry is less active, and has more friends. Ali is a more visable target. There goes my big flip plan!

Ugh okay so this is #4 on day 4. So basically since i won my tribe was safe. Then we got to deal with 2 twists. First is do we want to keep, throw away, or give someone and idol clue. Of course i keep it bc why would I want someone else to have it? Plus i can just lie and give others a fake clue. The second is that I joined the red tribe and go to tribal with them but im immune... So i get to vote and im p sure imma vote zack, even though i think i can work with him, i need switzerland and great lakes people to leave. I cant risk having their former relationships come into play and bite me in the butt. SO tonight it will either be Nehe or Zack but I'm voting Nehe! Wish me luck!

Okay y'all I'm packing my bags. Fuck! This! Twist! FUCK THIS CAST! I HATE. Fuck seamus. Next time I'm on a tribe with him he's getting lit tf up. It's round one and he made up lies about me already and it's really sad because he really doesn't know who he's fucking with. Bitch boy just ruined his own game If I survive this tribal I'm going to end him. I am going to Fucking END SEAMUS. He looks like the mom from suite life of zack and cody. He's like telling nehe that me and zack are best friends and basically pinning the target on us and telling nehe that I talked to him the least when I literally have talked with Seamus everyday. Like is he inbred? I was starting to really like him but he truly fucked himself over now. I don't rest until his basic white gay ass goes.   

The info I know: 

1. Make nehe 100% on board with me again. 

2. Nehe wants to vote zack or Dustin but he doesn't want to vote crow. 

3. Zack wants to convince nehe to vote Dustin instead of him but he still wants to vote nehe out. 

4. Seamus wants either zack or I out 

Info I need: 

1. Is dustin still 100% on the vote nehe out train? 

2. Crow told me and Dustin he wants to vote nehe but told nehe he wants to do zack or Dustin but preferably Dustin. What tf does crow want? 

Nehe knows too much. Crow isn't gonna go, no one wants him out. I got nehe protecting me right now. What I need to know is If crow is really with nehe and he genuinely wants to vote out zack or Dustin. 

As much as I love nehe, Crow has sunk his social game claws into him already. He's the middle man between zack/Dustin and me/crow. If I'm able to survive this round and get through this I can for sure make the target next week to be Dustin or crow. Nehe is STILLLLL telling people that me and zack are a final 2.

I FUCKING HATE THIS CAST. Dustin keeps me sane. I'm glad I have him. How did he go from my least fav on the tribe to my absolute fav? 

[7/6/17, 3:52:25 PM] Amir: On 7/6/17, at 3:51 PM, Nehe Mehe wrote: > you are way nicer than i would’ve guessed Amir 

Okay I feel fucking bad but like he literally went and told the whole tribe that me and zach are a final 2. Im scared but tbh my skin has been clear for a long ass time and I got a pimple today and this game is to blame. If I get voted out I might become sane again.

Ah what a lovely event tribal council is! I thought I would be in trouble but I'm actually likable I think??? Wow I'm shooketh.

So after Nehe's blunder at the comp and Zack's inept social game, it put them both on the chopping block. I would love to just chop both but I have to choose apparently....Nehe has Seamus on his side and Zack has Amir on his side leaving Dustin and I, the dream team of distrust, as the swing votes. (But there's a lot of lies in between so it might not be that clear)

And although I'm closer to Nehe, him going reaps more benefits as I gain trust with Dustin, Zack, and Amir and cut the only person who would be my enemy moving into this tribe swap....

So I'm throwing my first knife at Nehe and I think it's going to pierce his heart. Whoops! #AnyoneButMe right?

#ChaosCrow or #CutthroatCrow ? I bet bitches didn't see me cutting so early but this is my second chance and I'm ready to draw blood.

SO! Guess who's ready for another summer of stress, sadness and seventh place? It's ya boy, Sid! With Magyi's tribal in 15 minutes, this confessional MAY be a little overdue, but I'm here to break down days one through four for you. 

Sagu is a beautiful tribe for beautiful people. At least, that's what I thought. Now, I've realized that I'm kinda pissed off that I'm not with my Twister Sister Sherry, or my number one: Amir. Y'all put me on a tribe with Jaiden, whose reputation precedes him, Luke, who I haven't talk to in days, and Seamus, who is probably the worst liar I've met. Seriously, someone let him win a game? I trust Liana the most right now, but even that is like a 7/10. 

I vibed with Seamus at first, but as soon as I approached him about working together, he really showed his cards with his tone. I don't trust him at all, and, after hearing about his antics on Magyi (thanks to this loser twist), I trust him even less. As SOON as I get the chance, he's gone. I have a metaphorical place on my wall for his metaphorical head. WE'RE GOING TROPHY HUNTING, BOYS. That being said, I'm in an "alliance" (more of a trust cluster) with him and Liana. 

I really feel like I'm keeping a level head, and I'm trying to play less antsy. That, however, isn't going to keep me from making big moves. One World sucks, but at least I can talk to Amir. He's honestly my number one, and I'd never betray him. I love Sherry too, and I can't wait to reunite with her again. I'm going to go watch Magyi's tribal now, but I'm so excited to play Cutthroat Island!!! It's going to be a doozie.

Idk what's happening this tribal, maybe bodhi is not with us? He aint replying maybe they are against me and rob, these people are crazy and I just wanna stay, I give my heart and souls to this game.

Hello! I'm back for a third time now to attempt a second win! I'm really nervous to start the season but also super excited to have gotten another chance at the win. It's weird being one of two winners in this season. The feeling is just weird and unexplainable. I believe this season is going to be super messy and people will be all over the place, I just hope to at least make merge and jury and from there get to the end. My tribe is really good we have a lot of people who made it far and I genuinely like all of them. Since this is a one word season I wanna make a few connections with the people on other tribes to so I'm safe for a swap or something. I feel like I'm paranoid 24/7 this season compared to my other two seasons where I felt I always tried to make a safety net for myself... this season there is no way I can make a safety net yet because I don't trust many if any people. As for my tribe I feel like I wouldn't be the first boot just because of my first impressions I think, however you can never know. For right now before swaps or anything I wanna be seen as a coattail rider and start from the bottom up and work my way into a good position so people will not target me right away and work on relationships with people. 

I'm so happy Stevie won the challenge because that means I made Final 18! I'm so happy I didn't get the first two boots I honestly would have actually cried A LOT. I'm even more nervous now that there is less people because one step closer to the end and it'll only get more cutthroat from here on out.

I went on call with Dom who revealed Bodhi is shady. Dom said that he would like people to be straightforward with him. I agree, so i decided to tell Ali everything. Ali knows what is happening because i do really like him and he deserves to know. I told Bodhi that voting Ali is stupid and he believed me. Sherry is going to flip because she knows she's on the chopping block. So flipping Bodhi should flip Dom too. The vote should be Sherry, but she said she has the idol. I don't know if I believe it, but it should be Ali then? Fucl Stevie btw. If this vote goes to plan I'll scream I might have done that. 

I had 7 calls back to back to back. 

JAIDEN I hated Jaiden from before this game, but after talking to him he seems quite alright and I'd love to work with him this time around. I actually really like jaiden which is a huge suprise. 

ROB Rob just needed some reassuring. I reassured his ass. 

ALI Ali needed reassuring as well. I did the exact same to him 

STEVIE I needed to fill Stevie in on the vote so he didn't get mad when it was Sherry 

ABEL We talked about the game for a bit, nothing spesific but we got along great ALI Abel hung up on me and Ali wanted me to call again. We said almost nothing and I think he's happy. 

ABEL Oh my god. This was the most important call of the game. We were giggling about our dislike of Luke together, and we're going to go FAR. I love Abel and I want to go to the end with him.

[survivingjapan]

EPISODE 6 "If Britney Spears Can Get Through 2007 The Villains Can Get Through Tribal Again" -Brian

Hey Alex.... Sad thing is was that I was fighting for you probably the hardest for the longest (hence the Raven crying pic), but then not only does your pal Richie decide to be a lunatic at tribal, but you also were making it quite hard.... I defended you to multiple people, but I can't do anything substantial if A) I don't hear from Linus myself about his potential swing vote and B) You tried to make a deal with Kage to force rocks and not tell me I liked you more than most of these people, but I can't work with someone who makes an alliance and then tries to force it in danger by accepting a selfish proposal to try and save only yourself and not your allies. I think it was just the way the cookie crumbled that it ended up this way....:L gl on the outside, I might be joining u soon.

Where is Nic asking for confessionals when we need him? :P I'm really sad that Alex is gone, I wanted to work closely with he and Richie, so it sucks that he's not around but I'm hoping that Richie and I can work together before too long. Right now I just want to make jury and once I accomplish that I'll feel better! 

What happens when you bring together the 13 most messy, paranoid, villains? Kyoaku? Kyaoku? Kayoaku? Koyaku? I have no clue how to spell out name. But anyway, you get us Also, one more thing FUCK RICHIE FUCK LINUS FUCK JONATHAN

We win again... woohoo. Not anything different, but the more important part of this round is that I couldn't figure out how finding the idol went, since I'm pretty inexperienced, and honestly would've never figured that out, so I asked Steffen for help, and he goes ahead and just punches in a magic word into a url, and he found the idol and is now choosing to not give it to me, after it being all me who found it for us. I am clearly trusting Steffen for now, but I know he is a VERY smart player, and I wouldn't be surprised if he fucked me over at the end of the day, but I get a strong feeling that he won't do it to me. I just don't think he would, and if he did, it'd probably be one of the shadiest moves that could be pulled, but I'm also not trying to use this thing y'know. It'd be killer if I found it, figured everything out, and Steffen just punched in the URL, and he needed it to save himself and I didn't need it at all. My only concern is if one of us is holding onto it, and then the other needs it played on them, then that's going to leave the person playing the idol VERY vulnerable, but that's something we're just going to have to roll with, and going back to my previous point, if we even need to use this thing, it's a sign of weakness, but also a great tool for us to have in our back pockets. 

People are constantly criticizing my game but messy or not, when it comes down to it, my social game has saved me 3 times in a row now

crow and sarah can eat the entirety of my ass tbh GOD i hate being on a tribe with these people.... after the mess that was the rocks scenario crow came to me and was like "have you talked to alex he has a plan for an alliance" and i went to alex and said ".....crow and sarah didnt they just vote you out?" and he was like "they came to me my dude" so whatever i never trusted them because sarah was sketchy about the hinky vote against me at the rocks tribal... BUT i thought okay theres no reason for them to go thru all this trouble if they were just going to vote out me or alex like we're at the bottom no reason to string us along i guess we could come together vote out kage this one round and from there maybe a unified tribe would allow for more moves for me in the upcoming rounds.... but shortly before tribal brian comes to me and is like im voting out alex i dont want there to be a tie bc crow and sarah are voting alex so im like okay theyre votes are already in for alex and you cant change votes this wont cause IMMEDIATE consequences and im going to need alex still here to back me up for this so 15 minutes before tribal i start WW3 asdfjhasfk i call out sarah and crow for the alliance and for sarah blaming junior for the hinky vote against me blah blah more goes down i say more things alex says things they say things everythings a mess and im just trying to paint the image that those 2 are liars and expose them just in the off chance that someone believes me and has an ounce of doubt against them bc with alex leaving and those 2 lying about it i was alone on this tribe anyway with no real social connections so id be gone next tribal.....but of course we lost the duel immediately after alex was voted out and i went crazy so i dont really have the time to do damage control at this point now its just campaigning which is going to be.................difficult i already went to junior kage and tommy with some campaigning last night but idk im going to need a miracle or someone to realize that i'm an asset that can be used like anyone who saves me right now gains an ally that has no other connections besides them so im prime numbers material in arabia i played such an under the radar social game where even when i backstabbed people and voted everyone out (except ting ting RIP) and i still got them to vote for me in the end bc i formed relationships and remained a likable positive quiet game player.... in this game.... BITCH i'm JT the winner that should have just played once because they just blow up their game from being extra in the next go around 

okay remember the last time i wrote a confessional i was in the mindset of i know i'm going down but i'm going to do everything in my power to stay? well fuck that i swear to god i'd rather be voted out than ever have to have another conversation with tommy again i have never met anyone who is more infuriating to speak to and i CANT DO IT I"D RATHER BE VOTED OUT ITS ENOUGH!!!!!!!!    

On 9/6/17, at 6:28 PM, cat (japan host) wrote: > okay FIRST it all started when i woke up and had to live another day Honestly I'm Cat

Hey I haven't been here in a while because we literally haven't lost since Mist. Not that there haven't been any developments, because their have been! It's just that the villains suck booty. And they're losing their 5th person in a row tonight. I wasn't really pressed about any of the eliminations other then Jaiden. I wasn't sure if I would have been able to work with him, but I was able to get quite a bit of info out of him. And now my outlet for villain tea is kinda gone. And the fact that I was in Canada all last weekend didn't help me in finding a villain tea substitute. BUT with all of them dropping like flies, it's hard to tell who would be a good candidate :') Other than Jaiden, we saw Ashley go which is fine because she's from India and I want them dead. Alex S went too so that's a thing. I feel like I need to really start messaging some of these villains to gain a connection - whether we swap any time soon or not there's an inevitable merge that there's a chance I could be at. The problem is though, I don't wanna really talk to any of them asdfghjk. Tommy and Sarah sketch me out, Brian and I are not on good terms, and while Linus and Kage could be chaotic and spill shit, I don't wanna get caught up in their messes. That leaves Richie, Junior, and Jonathan. Which obviously one of these 8 is going tonight, so I won't start messaging until after the tribal. I'm still skeptical of a swap and I'm hoping one doesn't happen so I can utilize getting close to the villains that I want to before we ACTUALLY meet up with them. But as for tea on the hero side, there's an obvious conflict on who we would hypothetically take out if we go to tribal. With 12 of us, we need 7 so someone isn't Jaiden'd. The main argument is whether to go for a Malaysian or to just take out Steffen. The thing is, I've been getting really close to Johnny and I think he trusts me. And he wants to bring in Steffen for a strong Solomon 5. Now, I don't want that to last forever seeing as I want Steffen gone soon anyway. But I think we need him for one round. Because the Malaysia/India hybrid duo of Kendall and Alex is a major problem. And Drew is someone who is just a massive threat to begin with. But Isaac still just wants Steffen gone. And he doesn't think that we could take out someone like Kendall or effectively take out Alex with Pippa being close to him. HERE'S THE GAG THOUGH! I talked to Pippa for a little bit one on one today, and she is totally down with taking out Kendall or Alex. The thing is, they both seem a little bit checked out. Kendall has 2 strikes, and Alex has kinda died out since his audition. Which... I absolutely feel for them if they're dealing with real life struggle. But at the same time if they're not gonna be super invested and if one of them already has 2 strikes then I won't question voting them out. So if Isaac knows Pippa is down to come for one of them, then we have the Solomon 5 already. Then it comes down to the outliers of Dom, Trace, Ruthie, and Ashton. I know Pippa and Johnny both really like Dom separately. Isaac likes Trace. I personally like Ashton but dunno how long we could trust him because he seems like he could have a chaotic side to him. And then there's Ruthie who I just would prefer not to really work with long term because she's such a social threat, and if we swap or get to merge way down the line or whatever and Ruthie is there, I feel like she's someone villains would definitely flock to for a potential number because she's so social and kind. And I know girl can be a flipper. So this just comes down to who do we wanna take out, and getting enough people on the same page for my own agenda. Because at the end of the day this is to benefit MY agenda the most. Isaac wants out Steffen still, and I was already able to talk Pippa out of going for Drew first. If we could get a Malaysia/India person out, then Drew, then Steffen, that would be the most optimal. Will it happen? Probably not just because that's so specific. However, it is still at least an outline that I would like to ATTEMPT trying to follow.

[survivorcutthroat]

Rob’s Jury Question/Answer(s)

Congrats you two on making it to the finals.

Zack

I respect your game. You were able to survive many tribal councils where you were a target, yet you also remained low-key at the same time. You were loyal to your alliances and weren’t fake. You didn’t try to talk to me which I weirdly appreciate because you wouldn’t have to lie to me, you weren’t going to betray me because we weren’t really close and there was really no need to talk to each other.

I told the jury about what you did at the final 5. It’s a game move you made, but you wanted me to keep it quiet even here. I think it benefited you so I want you to own up to the fact that you gave your idol to me. You told me that you were voting me out, which is a plus in my book even if it is some obvious kiss-assing because that means you’re honest and I appreciate it when people are honest. The jury: *laughs.* You said I was going to win but I really wasn’t I was spot on about what the jury was thinking of me,

I want you to describe your relationships with the jury and Amir. It (better) can be long, I want honest opinions of what you thought of them, how they helped you out, why you went against them. That’s it from me, good luck.

Amir

*Cracks knuckles*

It’s no surprise that the cast gets leaked, especially with this season. I found out three people who were playing this season before it started. Jaiden, Luke, and you. I did my research, looked through your old confessionals in Transylvania, asked around about you. My analysis was that you were a very charming guy, you got people to think they were tight with you, and then you would cut them loose. Now I look like the biggest Booboo The Fool. You would say, “Rob! I feel like I tell you things but you don’t tell me anything.” And that’s the reason why. I didn’t want to get close to you, I didn’t want you to betray me, I didn’t want to be that idiot who thought you were his best friend in the entire world just for you to backstab them. I was literally afraid of this happening, and what do you know, it does, because I’m a fucking genius.

I always wanted to meet you, and when we were cast in Clash of the Titans 4 it was the best opportunity because I could get to know you and become your friend, get close to you to where you would want to work with me in this game as well. Where there game intentions? Yes, but you were a really caring guy and I did like you on a personal level.

I was sad that we weren’t together originally, but then we went on to new Magyi. You became my closest ally, the person I wanted to make the end with, the person I was playing this game for, the person who made me grateful to be in this shitty game. I think that you were at the bottom, but I didn’t want you to be, that’s why I told you about the “majority” because I really did trust you. I told you pretty much everything that was going on in that tribe because you were the only person I really really did trust on Magyi.

We make merge and I’m terrified. I voted in the minority on the previous vote and I went to you alone and afraid. You were there for me. You were there for me whenever I was sad, whenever I needed someone, whenever I needed a friend. I did pretty much everything we talked about. Voting Stevie, Mearl, Tommy, Dom, Crow, SId. We agreed that Mearl had to go after he betrayed me and our trust. You knew I loved Tommy, how he was a friend of mine, and how I was conflicted about that vote. But I vote out Tommy, because of YOU, I told the Cutthropes about the minorities’ plans because of YOU, pretty much everything I did in this game was because of YOU. I told you about Dustin’s idol, I got Tommy, Crow, and Dom to vote for Zack instead of you because I didn;t want you to go in case something went wrong or I decided to go with them, I told you about basically everything that could have a relevance to us and our games. At final 5, Zack makes me promise not to tell ANYBODY but I immediately tell you what happened. And that’s because you were my number one, my ally, my comrade, my best friend. I tell my friend everything, and at the F4 she said it might be smart to take you out as the biggest threat. I shut her down so fast, you’ve been my closest ally in this whole game, you said you were going to play your idol on me at the F5, I thought you had my back 100%, you were realistically my only chance at survival, and I really thought you would tie it for me. People told me how you couldn’t be trusted, how I had to vote you out, but I didn’t want to believe them, I thought that that’s not the Amir that I’ve gotten to know, I know he has my back and is looking out for me. Turns out, I was wrong. I would have been okay if you had at least told me you were voting me out. But you didn’t, you said “I’m voting Dustin right the fuck now,” And now everything just feels fake. Our alliance feels fake. Our relationship feels fake. You seem...fake.

 Did I debate cutting you at F3 if I had the chance? Yes. Was it realistic? Knowing me, no.  I would have been fine losing to you in the F2, I probably would have taken you to the F2 because I don’t give a fuck, I wanted to guarantee one of us winning. Can I say that now? Honestly, I’m not sure. Do I sound like a hypocrite? Yes. Do I care? Not really. You probably thought if you voted me out I would be a vote for you, and you probably will be right.

You won two challenges this season. Congrats. Let’s see if you can win one last one.

https://68.media.tumblr.com/4499cf271ad1d05d805952c43166a151/tumblr_o5nssqyw9D1v9j7mmo4_250.gif

I am you, you are the ketchup bottle, your lies were the ketchup.

You’re doing the #WasteHerTime2017 Challenge, inspired by a queen. I would like you to analyze ALL of our conversations and post the messages where you wasted my damn time, where you told me bullshit, where you were being fake. I want timestamps, I want receipts. You can write and include anything you would like about the messages you post.

I also want you to be honest with me. Tell me the things you hate about me, the things that annoy you about me, that piss you off. I can tell there were times you were mad at me and I want you to be upfront about it.

I say all of this with very harsh love, because at the end of the day, I do love you. I do want to be friends. But that does not guarantee you my vote.

Good luck,

From Booboo the fool.

Okay this is the first question we got and its the last one im answering. I basically wrote an entire draft of this question doing what you told me and structuring this answer and you know what im not sending that. Im going to just go into a headspace where i can be genuine with you, and im going to type out how i feel, and them im not going to reread this answer, im not going to edit it, im just gonna send it. Rob, im not fake. Our friendship was not fake. I care about you so much as a friend, maybe to you my actions in the game didnt reflect that and i don't even know where to start. Your friendship meant a lot to me, and im not ignorant to the fact that i could not have made it this far in the game without you. You were extremely loyal and i felt like had someone who was truly looking out for me. Rob i was so loyal to you for almost the entire game and multiple times i did have the intention of taking you to the end completely, but when final 4 hit, i struggled so fuck hard rob i really really struggled. I told you i was going to tie it and i planned on it but it was all because of how much i cared about you but in the back of my mind i knew it was a bad move, i knew it was a final 3 and id be pissing off the 2 people that id go to final 3 with, and it would mean that id be solidifying my position as a 3rd place for the second time in a row. I really really had to seperate game and emotion and while that my biggest strength, i absolutely hate the fact that i hurt you, rob idk what else to say to you i cant make you believe me but i was there for you through everything. I was never someone who tried to make you dependant on me, whenever you brought up your problems i only ever told you that you were a smart guy who deserves self confidence, i always tried to help being a happier person and to truly love yourself and see yourelf as a the kind person we all see you as in this game. This answer is getting long af but so was your question so imma just keep but rambling. Rob theres nothing that i hate about you. I delete the first draft of my answer because im not supporting your self destructive question, its a way to hurt me and way to hurt yourself and it completely takes anything fun out of this game. As someone whos preached self love to you, im not going to do what you said and make you hate yourself or hurt your feelings over a jury vote. If you don't wanna vote for me for not exposing your personal messages and being mean you, then don't vote for me. And id be completely lying because i have nothing ill to say about you. Okay, thats all, im sorry, i really really hope you forgive me

Okay! So.. I guess it’s no secret now that yes, I did in fact give Rob my idol to play on himself at final 5. I felt bad because we all attacked him in the immunity challenge and I thought Abel’s idol was actually real so I wanted to give him a fair chance to compete in a fire making challenge and see who really wanted to be here. I didn’t have any intensions on Abel to leave but that is just how the cookie crumbled and I don’t regret doing this for Rob.

Now let me describe my relationship with the jury. I’m gonna be nothing but honest here.

Luke. I’ve known Luke for a little while now and I actually played my first ORG with him. We both just played Switzerland together and believe it or not, we actually worked together. Like I said in my rights of passage, I had all intensions on working with Luke in this game but, shit happens! Looking back now, I think Luke leaving actually benefited my game. There was so much talk about a Switzerland alliance (which was not real but I did want to start one since people already thought there was one) so when people saw that we actually voted against each other, I think that opened people’s eyes that wow, okay, this is actually a whole different game and just because of past relationships, anything can happen. I personally love Luke and love that he like’s all my Facebook/ IG post. A real hunt owo.

Stevie. I’ve played past games with Stevie and.. We never really clicked. We’re both completely opposite people with different interest. We never worked together so I pretty much assumed it would be the same in this game. I tried talking to Stevie and tried connecting with him but the only thing we connected about were bears. But… I’m not complaining! That being said, I respect Stevie and would love to get to know him outside of the game, but in the game, we never worked together and never were going to work together because I couldn’t see myself trusting him after he tried to blindside me. But I’d love to get to know more about him and talk more about bears.

Mearl. Mearl is someone that I knew nothing about. I had no past relationship with him so I needed to start a relationship with him from the start. We would talk from time to time but it would jus be the basic game talk. Like “have you heard anything about the vote?” “Oh I heard so and so say this.” But I was very careful with what I told Mearl because I was petrified of him. Going on the Great Lakes wiki and seeing that he won almost every single challenge, I knew he would be competition. I didn’t want him on my bad side at all because I also feared he had an idol. So I would just do my friendly talks with him without giving out any game information and I was thrilled to see he added me in his majority alliance because I feared being on his radar so bad. I respect Mearl so much as a game player.

Tommy. Knowing nothing about Tommy and hearing people talk about how ‘Cutthroat’ is he actually has been in other games, scared me. I would try to talk to Tommy as much as possible, but it was hard. It was so hard to connect with Tommy. Nothing against him, it’s just, we’re totally different people with not much in common. Tommy can talk for hours and I’m more of a person to just have one daily normal conversation a day. I knew Tommy was targeting me for multiple rounds so when we did talk, I would always try to be very careful at what game talk I would actually say without revealing anything. I slipped up a couple of times though but I backtracked and saved myself. Hopefully Tommy and I can talk after this game and clear everything up that really happened.

Crow. Crow helped my game so much. Without him, I may not even be here. He stuck his neck out for me without even knowing who I was so when Crow left, it was definitely hard. I get Crow is mad right now but I respect him so much as a person and a game player and everything I said to him after he tried to vote me out was just a joke and I meant nothing by it. Crow is someone I would 100% want to be friends with outside of this game.

Sid. I knew a little bit about Sid from what other people told me and I realized he’s actually very trust worthy. I wanted to be on the same tribe as him and when we weren’t, I was so glad to see him surviving Tribals because I knew we could both benefit off of each other. I was super happy when we made merge together and I’m even happier that we developed a friendship out of this game. We both helped each other’s game’s in different ways and I respect him so much. If Sid got to the end, he would be a huge competition to beat and that’s why he had to go when he did. Nothing but respect.

Abel. Rob, like you said, a lot of the cast was leaked. Abel and I applied together and we were both so fucking happy and excited to play together, again. We both just played Switzerland and when we actually started the game we realized how fucking hard this is going to be because it was no secret how close us 2 were in that game. I always saw myself protecting him and I always saw him protecting me. We would both tell each other all the information we had and go on from there. Not only was it nice having a great ally in the game, but it was nice to have a friend in the game that I could talk to about anything, not just game talk. He really did keep me sane.

Rob. I would say our relationship is very.. Odd. We rarely talked but we both saved each other. I think I had no choice but to give you my idol because you voted in my favor so many times when you could have taken me out. Honestly, thank you. I knew from what people were telling me that you actually liked me and I actually really liked you and I never would bring up your name. i don’t regret doing what I did for you and I hope you don’t regret helping me out in this game. You’re such a nice kid with a great personality and I respect you so much that I couldn’t lie to you. I really hope we can start some kind of friendship outside of this game.

Dustin. DADDY!!! I was so glad to see Dustin was playing this game. For some reason, we just clicked from day 1. For me, day 1, it was game time. Dustin and I were talking and giving each other information from the very start. I’m so happy and grateful that I got to actually officially meet him and play with him. He helped my game and I would like to say, I did the same for him. Dustin was such a great ally and I love him so fucking much. He’s someone I can say I became really good friends with inside of this game.

Amir. Ahhh! I never actually thought me and Amir would make Final 2 together. Coming into this game, Amir and I had some bad blood. But we both put that aside and knew we could really help each other in  this game and make it far. We were called out day 1 for knowing each other and being friends so I can honestly say I’m shocked we’re sitting in the finals together. I love him so much.

Thanks for your question, Rob, I actually really enjoyed typing this. ;~)

OK, and with that it is now time for our Jury to vote! Jurors, you will be tasked in voting to decide Tumblr Survivor’s 56th winner. Please decide carefully. Your votes are due to your host chat by August 18th @ 8:00 PM EST.