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jjkafterhours · 3 years ago

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Hiii when's part 3 of reversal of the heart comin? love your story <3

REVERSAL OF THE HEART.

PART THREE.

PAIRING;; Toji Fushiguro/Reader

TAGS/WARNINGS;; angst, fluff, slowburn, mentions of tragedy and loss @brumous11

WC;; 1.5k+

NOTES;; tysm !! It makes me really happy !! reversal of the heart will have multiple parts, although I haven't had a concrete idea on the number of parts, because I want the buildup to be as natural as possible.

PART ONE PART TWO

He checks on you for the remainder of the week. He does not let you notice, of course; randomly entering your room to ask for something mundane, lingering a little longer at the door before he leaves for work. He decides to shelve his thoughts at the back of his head for the moment. His family needed him.

Taking care of two children is not an easy task. It requires patience and softness, judging by how shy Megumi and Tsumiki are. You had never seen Megumi throw a fit, except for when his father was present. Yet, Toji did not seem like the kind of person who would treat his children harshly, or have favorites. You had seen Toji coddle Tsumiki endlessly for the remainder of the evening because of the bruise on her leg. It was true that he had little time to care for them, but you could see him trying his best.

You wondered if you could ask Megumi about what was wrong. You were not exactly sure whether you had earned the boy’s trust completely. Tsumiki seemed slightly closed off, judging by how she would occasionally complain about some unruly classmates at school before abruptly going quiet, her face flushing. You would smile. Tsumiki rarely talked much, and you were happy that she had started the conversation. Little by little, you began to know more about them.

Megumi rarely caused any trouble. But he was so quiet, you wondered whether your presence in the household was some sort of punishment to him. He was only 5, and you rarely saw him speak up, except for perhaps his sister. You could never really tell what he was thinking, or what would lead to his sudden outbursts. Neither could Toji, for he never retaliated, struggling to placate his son, his hands extended towards him, while Megumi wailed and pushed him away, running back to his room. You were sure that part of the reason was because Megumi missed his mother, but you could not tell what triggered his outbursts in Toji’s presence. Was it because he was rarely at home?

“Gumi, do you like pancakes?” You asked, running your hands through the boy’s hair. Megumi flushed with pleasure, quietly nodding. You kiss the top of his head before sitting down to eat.

“Thank you.” He replies. Megumi was a sweet kid, and suddenly you remember that he had been trying to console you on the way back from the Zenins. Toji did not tell you much about them, but he clearly held some sort of resentment towards them, so you did not ask. You knew little about his personal life in general, only hints and vague impressions here and there. You wondered if you could ask the kids, but then decided to brush it off, not wishing to unearth any sort of unpleasant memories.

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“It’s not fair!” Megumi wails. “I wanted to stay with Mom!”

“I know, Gumi, I’m so sorry.” You whisper. His wails become gut-wrenching sobs, his hands becoming little fists clutching the fabric of your shirt, drenched in his tears.

“It’ll all that I ever wanted!”

“Dad loves you a lot, Megumi.” You said softly. “He’s just busy, but I promise you he is trying his best.”

“No,” He shakes his heads furiously, sniffling. “And neither do you. You’re just being nice to me because I’m his son. I know you’ll kick me out the moment you have a kid.”

“No, sweetheart, I would never.” You murmured, as you stroked his hair. “You and Tsumiki, I love you both. I’ll never leave you.” Where had he gotten such a notion from? He seemed fine even in the morning.

“You’re lying!” He screams, pounding his fists against your chest. “You hate me because I’m in the way!” The only consolation was that he had not pushed you away completely; as you rocked him back and forth.

“I love spending time with you, Gumi,” You insist, caressing his face. He buries his head in your chest and lets out a muffled scream as you rub his back.

“You’re lying.” Megumi repeats, sniffling. “You’re both liars.”

“Your father…he is really a good person, Megumi.” Though perhaps you were not sure whether it was a good decision to stay with him. “I promise you that.”

“He hates me.” You remember seeing Megumi the first time, playing by himself when you moved into the apartment. Toji had left for work, Tsumiki to school, and Megumi had fallen sick. For a moment, it felt like he was the loneliest kid in the world, and it made you sad. Really sad.

You hold Megumi, for a long, long time. After his tears stop, after he had stopped hiccupping, his body wracking with the feeling of helplessness which came over him in waves. He does not let go of you.

“Why do you think that, Megumi?”

“Because mom died because of me.”

He hears it too. You know he does. You know that he is standing outside, at the landing of the stairs.

Toji does not enter the room. He just continues to stand there; quietly suffering in the silence he had caused, his torn-in-two mind resonating back and forth within his body. He hears you murmur softly into Megumi’s ear, words of reassurance and comfort which he could not offer. He had always been closer to his mother even when she was alive. Before you.

He is surprised to find tears dripping from his face, when he finally decides to walk away.

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As he lights the cigarette, he sees you frowning. It is the only thing which calms down his frayed nerves.

“No.” You insist, plucking it out of his hands. He stares, his face scarily blank; it did look comical, if he had not been leaning downwards, you probably would not have managed to snatch it from him in the first place. You crush it under your shoe, half-expecting Toji to immediately take out a pack of them, lighting another one, challenging you to do it again.

Nothing of the sort happens. His lips turn over, and before you know it, he is quietly sulking, without actually saying anything.

“I’ll buy you ice cream.”

“Okay.”

The ice cream parlor is mostly filled with high schoolers and people attending the university a few kilometers away from the school Tsumiki and Megumi went to. You feel Toji’s calloused fingers briefly brush against yours. He is still sulking when he holds your hand. He does not tell you what kind he likes; so, you decide instead. At first you wonder if you should take vanilla; since it seemed to be the safest option, but then it would be rather bland. You finally buy a tub of cookies-and-cream, and motion him to sit with you. He looks shocked.

“We’re not leaving until we finish this.” You declare, grinning up at him. He pauses for a moment.

“Is that a challenge?”

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“I didn’t know you had a sweet tooth.” You comment, as you both began to walk your way home. He seems to be determined to keeping his disinterested expression, but he does not let go of your hand.

“It was okay.” He shrugged. (He was lying, of course.)

“It was nice.” You said. “I hope you get more days off. We could go other places.”

“Like the park?” Toji says sarcastically.

“Well, it isn’t my fault you just like staying home and sleeping.” You protest, then pause. Were you being too forward? “I won’t drag you out into town, though, if you really did not like it.”

“No.” His eyes dart elsewhere. “I would like to.” He mumbles. You squeeze his hand slightly. He does not reciprocate, but settles on briefly brushing the back of your hand with his thumb.

“Megumi likes strawberry.” He says out loud. “Tsumiki’s more into coconut, but she likes the weirdly coloured ones too.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I think she wants to try out every single one from the menu. The last time she took this hideously green one,” His lips quirk up slightly. “She was nagging about it all the way back, so we swapped.”

You grin. “Do you remember the name?”

“No, but it tasted like shit.” He replies.

“Maybe we should do that too.”

“What, try to finish the whole menu?”

“Nah, that’s too much work,” You agree. “Only until we find the shitty green flavour.”

“A reasonable compromise.”

The way back home is quiet, but you sense something new in the air. When you glance at him, he is still staring at you, like he had never really seen you before.

"That was a nice date." You announce, as you begin to take off your shoes. Toji raises an eyebrow.

"Didn't feel like a date." He comments. "It wasn't anything fancy."

"Fancy dates are for losers." You reply. "I just wanted to spend time to you." To keep your mind off of it.

It suddenly strikes you how swiftly you had taken up the role in the family. How natural it felt, waking up to see Toji shuffling around the house, the kids still asleep; comforting Megumi when he cried, helping Tsumiki with her homework, and finally, this.

"I thought dates were supposed to end with a kiss or something." Toji says. That makes you pause for a moment. It seemed unlike him. Normally he would ask you how your day went and that would be it.

"You could, if you wanted to." You hear yourself say, as you look up at him. His expression remains blank, and for the briefest of moments you think that you catch some sort of conflict flicker in his eyes. Toji is tall, his form towering over yours whenever he did come close. It had not been as apparent back when you both were at the ice cream parlour.

It is not the kind of kiss which makes butterflies flutter inside one's stomach. It's a chaste one on the forehead, and yet, it is one of many firsts as his hands circle your waist briefly before pulling you towards him. Even when he embraces you, he keeps himself at a distance, unsure, anxious. When he pulls away you are both silent.

“It should have been me.” He says hoarsely. "Not her."

PART FOUR PART FIVE PART SIX PART SEVEN PART EIGHT

#toji x reader #toji x y/n #toji x you #jjk toji #fushiguro toji x reader #fushiguro x reader #jujutsu kaisen toji #toji fushiguro #fushiguro toji

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mrsgreenworld · 4 years ago

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Sen Çal Kapımı Episode 17 aka Expect The Unexpected

I know I have been quite slow with the reviews lately. I guess real life just got busier and messier. But my thoughts are always with the show, with our two crazy lovesick kids. I make sure to watch each new episode live, keep up with new fragmans.

I remember before episode 17 aired, after having seen the fragmans, I was ready for another filler episode. I was also a bit frustrated that instead of moving the storyline forward they decided to randomly throw in the pregnancy scare trope. However, the writers managed to surprise me with the episode that I hadn't expected much from. I also believe we might have got a bit of foreshadowing as well as an important catalyst to finally move the story forward.

But let's discuss all the good and bad in detail.

The things I loved/liked:

☑️ how balanced this episode was: the transition from the lighter and funnier first part to a more loaded second half with some longing between Edser, completely unexpected turn of events at the party and finally - that gut-wrenching final scene; everything was done at the right pace, at least it felt that way to me; they didn't drag on the pregnancy misunderstanding, it was resolved in one day which I was more than happy with (it could've lasted for days 😬);

☑️ Serkan: my baby is back where he belongs - among all the things I loved about the episode 🥰❤️

honestly, Serkan and his response to the whole situation was one of the main highlights for me - it was hilarious, it was adorable, it was sweet, it was loving;

I have already mentioned before that I absolutely love how attuned to Eda Serkan is; this episode wasn't an exception; do you remember the moment he realised something was up? it literally took a comment from Leyla to Eda about tea and our boy's eyebrows immediately furrowed in confusion and suspicion; and when he came up to Eda to tell her they would work together and asked if that was okay - of course he noticed how Eda's face changed before she left for the bathroom; and a concerned hubby that he is he asked Leyla what was wrong and then instructed her to keep tabs on Eda - swoon 🥰😍

that phone call to the family doctor and his face when he heard the doctor mention pregnancy - 🤣🤣🤣🤣

and then his comment about Ebola completely cracked me up - he's such a hypochondriac 👀😬🙈😂

his bathroom meltdown - comedy GOLD! Kerem was spectacular in that scene, his facial expressions as well as that "NE???!!!" - worthy of a standing ovation 👏👏👏 and it proves what a great actor he is in both funny comedy moments and loaded dramatic scenes; it gets me rolling on the floor when he juggles all sorts of facial expressions and I drown in my own tears when he cries;

then there were tiny adorable moments that, I think, really spoke volumes yet again what sort of person Serkan is - kind and caring, someone who loves deeply; when he told Eda not to sit down so fast, when he asked if she was hungry, tried to make her sit down, was worried that she was cold, took unhealthy snacks from her and got her fruit and nuts instead, was making sure she was comfortable, kept glancing at her stomach - all that was a sneak peek at what Serkan Bolat will be as a father; he will be such a mother hen and when Eda is actually pregnant I swear he will be the one more hormonal 🤣😂😆

I loved that he shared his suspicions with Engin;

his reaction when the misunderstanding got cleared up - I was rolling on the floor 🤣🤣

and while he was relieved it didn't look bad on him; it wasn't a type of relief when a person doesn't really want kids or doesn't want them with this particular person and thinks "oh, that was close!"; I am sure when it comes to Eda Serkan wants to make their own football team of Mini-Bolats; he wants this woman to have his children - I believe it without a shadow of doubt; however, I am also sure that, given the current situation Serkan and Eda are in, Serkan wouldn't want to tie Eda to himself like that;

the party - when he saw Eda in the dress he had bought for her 🔥🔥🔥🔥; I am sure he was useless in the conversations he was trying to make because his focus was entirely on Eda, he was following her every move with hungry eyes; damn, Sir! at least try to be a little more discreet 😏🥵

I loved how he asked Eda point blank if she had chosen the dress on purpose - he wasn't even trying to hide how affected he was;

and finally - of course there was that final scene with Serkan when he completely LOST IT; honestly, watching him break down like that - gave me chills;

we had never seen him like that; it's a well-known and established fact what kind of a person Serkan Bolat is - he's a control freak who can and is good at keeping his emotions in check, he doesn't express his feelings easily or even at all that's why he comes off as a cold and emotionless robot; so can you imagine how bad the situation has to be for him to lose it like that and not in the privacy of his home, where he's alone, but in the office, with all his employees and friends as witnesses?

the situation is really Serkan's worst nightmare due to the number of reasons:

1 - Serkan is a control freak (as I have already mentioned many times) and being in a situation where he cannot control something is hard for him psychologically;

2 - Serkan is a perfectionist and perfectionism often stems from the fear of making mistakes because a person was raised this way, wasn't allowed to make any mistakes as a child; we have even heard it from Serkan himself in one of the conversations with his father - he grew up thinking he had no right for mistakes, thinking that he must have done something wrong for his parents to just send him away;

3 - the cruel irony of this situation being so similar to what had happened to Eda's parents;

of course no one died but it could have happened; then Serkan would have turned into his father (in his own mind and eyes); it's just like Eda's parents all over again; can you imagine what kind of thoughts were going through his head? how he's cursed or something, that he really doesn't deserve Eda, that his family taints everything it touches... 😭💔

Kerem's acting in the last scene was truly one of his best and strongest Serkan moments👏👏👏👏;

☑️ Eda: one of my absolute favourite things about our girl is that she keeps her word; there are not many people who do this in life (while I myself try to keep my promises I, unfortunately, often fail);

I was so proud that, no matter what's going on between herself and Serkan, Eda didn't refuse to help Aydan and promised that they would work on her phobia together;

I also loved Eda's idea with the virtual tour around London - very creative and thoughtful way to help Aydan get out of the house without actually leaving the house because baby steps, this cannot be rushed, this type of problems don't go away at the snap of our fingers;

while I find it a bit strange that Eda volunteered to babysit a random couple's child (me and Serkan both, he also said that he doesn't understand Eda 🙈😆) it's another great manifestation to the type of a person she is - kind, loving, generous, ready to help even complete strangers; moreover, the whole situation with the baby allowed us to sneak a peek at Eda as a mother;

and speaking of that scene where Serkan said he didn't understand Eda and wanted to know why she would agree to help people she didn't know - I freaking LOVED how unapologetic she was when she said it's who she is; so he either accepts her for who she is (the way she accepted him) or he can be on his merry way; that's such a joy to watch - a woman who's not sorry for who she is, who loves and respects herself and demands the same respect in return 👏👏👏💞💞💞;

finally, there was the final scene but before that there was also a small moment after the roof had collapsed, when they were still at that house - everybody had left and Eda asked Serkan if there was something she could do, if he wanted to be left alone; she gave him what he wanted and needed in that moment;

but the next day, in the office, after having witnessed his breakdown Eda shows her unwavering belief in Serkan; I loved how she was able to put aside her hurt, maybe to an extent even her pride, and come to him; how she didn't back down and in that moment refused to leave him alone because she knew that wasn't what he needed, he needed her; and she was there, she was there when it mattered;

☑️ Edser: these two idiots are broken up but I swear they couldn't look or act more married; that's basically what we got in this episode - a flashforward of sorts where Edser are married with a kid and expecting another one;

however, this episode also provided us with some longing and lots of UST at that party;

and again there were subtle nods to them being soulmates, which manifested itself in how attuned to each other they were (Serkan with the pregnancy, Eda at the end of the episode) and also the parallel scene at the very beginning with both of them boxing - the same choice of activity to take their minds off of each other (it was also hot as hell 🔥🔥🔥🥵);

☑️ Aydan: OMG CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?

yes, Aydan made it into this category!😱😲

but the writers had really been doing a good job with her and actually showed character growth;

at the beginning of the episode when Eda confronted Aydan about what she had overheard Aydan tried to make something up and said how it was her who had convinced Serkan that they were wrong for each other; what I really enjoyed in that moment was how uncomfortable Aydan looked while saying all those things; it was basically written on her face that what she was saying wasn't true, that wasn't how she felt, she understood that it would hurt Eda to hear that and she didn't want that; it's such a stark contrast to Aydan from episode 11; does anyone remember episode 11? well, I do, perfectly well; I was ENRAGED; Aydan back then said how Eda was not the right match for her son, she was cruel and she didn't even give a flying flip that her words were hurtful for Eda;

it was also nice to see how humbled Aydan was while receiving Eda's help;

☑️ Engin: basically the fact that he continues being the best best friend ever and his reaction to Eda's possible pregnancy - PRICELESS!🤣🤣🤣

I think Engin is the second (after Eda) and the last person who can get away with pulling Serkan Bolat by his cheeks 🙈😆😂

I also really enjoyed Engin's dig at Serkan's character and how he hoped his nephew/niece wouldn't take after Serkan 🤣🤣🤣;

The things I didn't like / was annoyed with:

❎ Efe: oh, he's one bad motherfucker!😠😡🤬😤

from pretty much openly threatening to teach Serkan a lesson to actually fucking up those blueprints and setting Serkan up - THE *UCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

it was clear from the phone call with his secret partner that he hadn't planned for it to go like that but still his intentions had clearly been far from good and he deserves whatever is coming his way; like Serkan Bolat coming for his head and ending his career 🙄😎;

❎ Pırıl and Engin: the whole jealousy thing was so far-fetched and tiring to watch; to me Pırıl seemed a bit too territorial, it's quite obvious that Engin had only eyes for her; Engin was too oblivious and honestly I feel bad for him because the writers turn him into a bigger idiot (when it comes to women) with each new episode;

❎ Selin: the same thing over and over again, in each new episode she's unbearable; she just walks around with bitch face, complains about everything and everyone but ultimately serves zero purpose;

this character is so focused on herself that she didn't even seem bothered by her conversation with Efe where he basically threatened Serkan; there was a poor attempt with that "should I be worried?" but it was enough for Efe to just smile at her and she let it slide 🤦🤷;

in that scene at the office with Ceren and Ferit the behaviour she demonstrated was the one of a pre-schooler or maybe immature teenager but definitely not of a grown-up woman;

❎ Ceren and Ferit: while they started out really well, I enjoyed their first meeting, then it got weird and their interactions became awfully uneven; Ceren is really overdoing this hot and cold thing;

while I liked how Ceren stood up for herself after Selin's outburst, I think all of that should have been said to Selin's face, not Ferit's.

And that's pretty much it! Finally!🥳🥳🥳

P.S. Wanted to post my episode 18 review today as well, before episode 19 airs, but it's still not ready, need to cut down some stuff cause it's turning into a freaking monster 🤦😱

#sen çal kapımı #sen cal kapimi #sck #sen çal kapımı episode 17 thoughts #sck episode 17 #edser #eda ve serkan #eda x serkan #eda yıldız #eda yildiz #serkan bolat

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