#if i had a house food on the table a job that doesnt explore me a national health system and free education

[itachikun]

if you stop to think about it, the US is criminal towards Cuba, North Korea (and China at times) because these countries, with their revolutionary processes and all the victories theyve conquered pose a threat to them. people cannot be allowed to understand the fact that housing, food, education, health services, employment and other basic needs can be provided outside of a capitalist reality to everyone, with good quality, free or almost free of cost. and since they cant prove these facts wrong, they disseminate and reinforce the propaganda that there is no freedom of thought, no freedom of expression, because that is the only thing they can attack.

[oh-for-fic-sake]

I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING I HAD TO SHARE!!!

What if Henry and his S/O's relationship is Dom and Sun because it's something they both need?

Like his S/O is a nurse/caretaker and spends up to 12 hours a day taking care of others.

Henry is an actor he spends his work days being told what to do by the director. He's expected to listen to directions and do what others tell him to.

So when they are together S/O needs someone to take the reigns because they are tired and don't want responsibilities and Henry needs control. Creating this perfect healthy BDSM relationship where Henry can take care of his tired S/O and she can let go of the stresses of taking care of many people every day.

I'm jealous of my own headcannon now😭😭😭😭

Omg! yes this would be perfect!

holyshit this is long but i just got carried away! sorry 😨😨

When you were dating it was Henry who planned everything and booked it. at first you thought it was because he was an actor and he his ‘private’ places to go.

He would find out your favourite foods and drinks so he could order them if you, his excuse was that way you wont get to look at the menu and complain about price- because he wasn’t having you tell him what he can and cannot spend on you.

It annoyed you at first, you were frugal with money-you had to be the nhs doesnt pay that well! but even so you did have some disposable income, you felt bad about it but he was a stubborn man and you’d never win.

Then as you got closer you noticed his quirks, you wouldnt say he was overbearing but he liked to know what was going on, your shifts and times youd be home ect.

When you got put on night shifts he would come pick you up and if he was away he paid for a taxi everynight to bring you home. you tired to tell him to stop wasting money but he refused “your saftey is more important to me then money”

You didnt mind in all honesty after spending 12-14 hour shifts running around looking after patients it was nice having someone watch out for you for a change, and he seemed to enjoy being the one to look after you.

it didnt take long to click that Henry was a dominant male, but not a mean control freak way, it was soft and gentle everything seemed to center around your comfort. sometimes you felt guilty but he brushed you off telling you to stop being silly he loved catering to you.

This carried over into the bedroom after a few months you both began exploring kinks and found that you were a perfect match, you loved having the stress of responsibility taken from you. it was a nice change, your job needed you to be on the ball and make potentially life saving decisions all day everyday. it was nice not having to think, and he was only to happy to order you around inbetween the sheets. you both got a kick out of it.

After you moved in officialy you noticed that Henry had a habit of being ontop of everything. he was meticulous about the bills, the chores the shopping everything. 

He wasnt ocd or picky but he knew everything that was going on in his home he was organised in a way you never dreamt a man could be!

 It was a load off your mind to be honest. There were no suprises in anything he just got it. he run the household like a well oiled machine and it was a nice change from your chaotic ‘oh shit i forgot to top up the electric again’ type of house you’d run

It wasnt long before you’d started following his lead, letting him have his say on most things, you enjoyed coming to him for answers, it made you feel secure. if you wasnt sure he would be, having that type of backup was somthing you soon craved and you trusted him.

Within a few months things had found a natural flow and you could feel yourself becoming a strong inpenatrable unit. you were well suited to one another, he was organised enough for the both of you and you loved that about him, outside of work you were a bit of a scatterbrain.

Then out of the blue he had just blurted it out, and not in sex either! you were sitting down at the coffee table unpacking your chinese take away and he’d blurted it out. ‘do you know your a sub?’

You’d looked at him like he’d grown a second head and tried waving him off but he didnt let up he continued ‘im serious, your a sub babe... not just in the bedroom’

‘Okay im a sub then? and whats it matter’ you added shrugging not really following what he meant.

‘I want to top you’ you frowned and pointed to the chinese ‘ but the food will get cold?’

he chuckled and began explaining that he wanted to be your dom permenantly. the conversation lasted a few days wokring out a few things but in the end you agreed to give it a go.

it was the best thing you ever did! he took more wieght off of you, giving you the strength to start saying no to things that wasnt good for you, like when work tried to overload you and run you into the ground. 

henry never became too overbareing he stayed the same for the most part sweet and caring being a soft boy watching over you

but thats not to say he didnt put his foot down, he gave you boundaries for your own wellbeing and consequences for when you didnt follow them like enduring a 16 hour shift without eating properly! 

the punishments werent nice but they helped you to remeber to take better care of yourself.

but punishments were few and far between, your realtionship was just that a relationship, sure you had a plethora of sex toys hidden in the closet for when you got to stressed of a little bratty. 

in the end you had both won the lottery, he got someone who would let him take charge and care for, and you got someone who could take the weight off your shoulders and take care of you. the relationship just worked for you!

[buginabog]

Am I Dreaming Or Dead?

Summary: ...sanders sides fantasy story. Purely self indulgent.

Pairing: royality, loceit, remile

Warning: death mention, sympathetic deceit, body horror (kinda)

-

People told you to never go into the woods.

People said those who went in never came back.

People said that monsters and ghosts roamed and that demons rose up from the pit.

So of COURSE Roman was going to explore.

"Roman? What are you doing?" Came a concerned call from behind him.

Roman groaned and turned to his twin brother, "I'm exploring the woods. Duh."

Logan raised an eyebrow, "the woods that no one has ever come back from?"

Roman laughed, "I didn't know you believed the tales Lo!"

Logan huffed, "I dont. But that doesn't change that those woods in particular are infested with dangerous creatures that will kill you."

"Added bonus then."

Logan groaned, "I swear, you'll give me a heart attack, you overdramatic, ridiculous, idiotic man."

Roman grinned, "I'm just going in for a few minutes, I'll only go a few feet. I promise."

Logan sighed, "fine."

Roman smiled and stepped inside the trees. He walked through the woods, his feet crunching on the pine straws carpeting the ground. He looked around, expecting to feel different, and sighed when nothing happened. He turned to his brother, "you were right Lo!" He turned around, "theres nothing he-" he broke off.

The thing that had caused his voice to stop dead in his throat was a small, floating blue thing. Unintelligible whispers came from it. Roman took a step toward it, sure that if he got closer it would tell him its secrets.

"Roman? Come on, let's go home!" Logans voice broke Roman out of his stupor. The wisp vanished.

"Oh... yeah! Coming!" Roman's gaze lingered on where the wisp was, and he turned and ran out of the woods.

-

Later that night, Roman had a strange dream.

The wisp was there, and it led him deeper and deeper into the forest, where a smiling man, with a freckled face and blue eyes, smiled and extended his arms. As if to give Roman a hug. Something in his face reminded Roman of someone. But he couldnt quite remember...

Roman woke up, panting. He got dressed in a frenzy, grabbing a bag and some food, before rushing to the forest and running in, looking around desperately for the wisp. Almost crying when he didnt see it. Then it turned up, with it's strange, haunting whispers. "You..."

The wisp bounced up and down. "Where do you want to take me?"

The wisp whispered, barely loud enough for Roman to hear, "follow."

Roman nodded, "ok"

The wisp took off, Roman running after it, so focused on it, that he didnt realize the tree roots moving out of his way, the branches moving to form a hallway. He followed the wisp so far that the trees grew taller than most of the buildings in his town, to a little glade where you couldnt see a hint of air pollution. The stars so clear and beautiful.

The sound of sobbing brought Roman to the present, he looked around, and saw the man from his dream. "Hello?"

The mans head jerked up and around, "oh, child... who brought you here?"

Roman looked around, "a- a wisp, but... where?"

The man smiled sadly, "ah, the tricksters."

Roman frowned, "what do you mean, 'the tricksters'? Who are you?"

The man shook his head, "its unwise to use names in the forest. If you must refer to me, call me Morality. As for the tricksters, they led you here for the hunters."

Roman growled, "who are the hunters!?"

Morality frowned, "it will be sunrise soon, you must leave the forest before the sun appears. Or the hunters will find you." Roman looked around nervously, "do you know the way home?"

Roman shook his head, "I followed the wi- trickster, here."

Morality nodded, "I see. Well, be on your way."

Roman stared, dumbstruck, "...but, I don't know how to get home..."

Morality smiled, "all roads lead home child, although not all lead back."

Roman groaned and turned around, "helpful. Could you at least point me the right-" he turned around to see... no one, "way?"

Roman set off through the forest, trying to guess the way back. As the moon dipped closer to the horizon, his search grew more and more desperate. Finally, the sky turned blood red, and then blue.

A howl sounded in the distance, followed by the sound of wild laughter. Roman's heart pounded, and he ran. He ran anywhere, with no goal in mind. He just needed to get away from that haunting howl and the terrifying laughter.

A creaking sound followed him. The sound trees would make if they could run. The laughter came with it.

Roman fell.

He looked back to see a thorny vine twisted around his legs, growing closer and closer to his torso. He tried and tried to push the brambles off. The vines only grew faster.

Morality appeared in front of him, tears falling down his face, "I'm sorry child."

Roman sobbed in despair, struggling against his thorny bonds. He managed to choke out one word, "why?"

Morality sobbed harder, "I- I hoped you could save me..." he conjured an image in his palms, "if someone destroys this, you and I, and all the others, will be freed." In his palms was the image of a crystal in a flowered field.

Roman looked around, and saw a man that looked just like Morality wrapped in vines. He looked around, and saw so, so many other forms wrapped in vines.

"Victims of the woods." Morality said sadly. "People who ventured into the woods."

The vines reached Roman's eyes. The last thing he saw was regret on Morality's face.

-

Roman woke up in the clearing he met Morality in.

Morality was sitting in the clearing, sobbing again. "Morality? What's happening?"

Morality looked st him in terror, "what are you doing here? They never come back after the hunters get them..."

"They?"

"The other people the tricksters preyed upon... they all moved on to... whatevers next."

"But...I didnt?"

Morality frowned, "no. You didnt."

-

Ten Years Later

-

Virgil walked downstairs, yawning. He could smell his favorite for dinner. Pizza.

"Hey L, Dee."

Declan smiled, "hey edge lord."

"Hey snake face."

Declan laughed, "that's a new one!"

Virgil gave a little bow, "thank you. It took me a gruelling 3 seconds to come up with."

Logan frowned, "3 seconds doesnt sound very gruelling?"

Declan rested a hand on his husbands shoulder, "sarcasm, dear," he explained.

Logan opened his mouth in a silent "oh" and went back to eating his pizza.

Virgil grimaced at Declans pizza, "I will never understand how you eat that." He said, gesturing to the pineapple-covered monstrosity.

Declan raised an eyebrow in Virgil's direction, "says the man who eats pizza with ranch."

Virgil snickered and started to eat.

They ate in silence for a while, before Declan looked at Virgil and cleared his throat, "Virgil?"

Virgil looked up, "yeah?"

Declan chewed the piercings on his bottom lip for a minute before speaking, "well, I got a new job opportunity, and Logan has a family house in a town near it. And we..."

"Have to move." Logan finished brusquely, his expression and voice cold.

Virgil frowned, "okaaay. L, you ok? You kinda look like you're about to murder someone."

Logans hand curled into a fist on the table, "it's fine. Just... some bad memories from that place."

Virgil nodded slowly, "ok. Well, cool."

Declan smiled, "oh thank fuck."

-

Virgil looked out the window of the car as they pulled up to big house that was Logans old house. It looked grand but empty, like all the life had been sucked out of it years ago.

Declan pulled into the driveway, "well, we're here." He turned to look at Virgil, "you sure you're good?"

Virgil smiled and nodded, "I'm fine Dee-Dad."

Declan chuckled, "nooooooo. I thought you forgot that!"

Virgil grinned evily, "nope."

Declan laughed, "well, Logan'll be here tomorrow with the truck. But in the meantime, let's get settled. Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

-

Two days later, most of the furniture was in the house, but there were still boxes everywhere. Virgil was overwhelmed by the clutter and decided to go exploring for a quiet spot to sit.

He had seen a forest on the edge of town when he and Dee drove in, so he decided to head there. He was nearing the edge when he heard a terrified voice cry out, "VIRGIL! NO!"

Virgil turned around to see Logan running toward him with a terrified look on his face, "L? What's up?"

Logan clutched his shoulders so hard it stung, "Virgil, you must promise me you will never, EVER, go into those woods. Do you understand?"

Virgil frowned, "L, wha-"

"PROMISE ME."

Virgil blinked. He couldnt remember a single time Logan had yelled at him. Not even when he ran away. "...I promise."

Logan sighed, "thank you. I apologize for my outburst but... just dont go into the forest."

Virgil nodded, and looked at the woods, trying to see what was so dangerous about them, when he saw a man standing there, looking, stricken, at Logan.

-

Roman looked at his brother, so grown up now. And the kid next to him, was that his son? ...He couldnt believe it. While he was frozen in time, everyone changed around him. He ran back to his clearing, eager to tell Morality what he had seen.

-

As Logan looked at Virgils faraway expression, terror gripped him. That same expression had been on Roman's face the day before... no. He couldnt think of that now. He had a son who needed him, and he was never, ever gonna let the forest take someone from him again.

-

Ten Years Ago

-

Logan yawned as he walked downstairs. "Logan, would you be a dear and wake your brother?" His mom called from the kitchen.

"Yeah. Sure." He walked back up and knocked on Roman's door, "hey dork. Wake up."

He frowned when there was no dramatic answer or offended gasp, and opened the door himself.

The window was open, curtains blowing in the wind. A note laid on the pillow.

'I saw something in the woods. And I had a weird dream. I think it's a sign. If I'm not back in the morning... well, I think you can know what happened. I love you bro. Love, Roman.'

Logan gasped in horror and ran downstairs clutching the note, "MOM, DAD!"

An hour later, he sat on the couch bei ng comforted by his boyfriend as his Dad frantically called everyone in town.

No one had seen Roman.

All Logan could say was, "my fault."

-

Ten Years Later

-

Virgil paced around his room. Who was the man in the forest? Why was Logan so scared of it? Why did the man look like he knew Logan? The man in the woods looked just like Logan, why? Virgil frowned when an idea came into his head.

He tiptoed downstairs into the living room, and a light switched on.

Logan sat there, dark circles under his eyes and his hair messier than Virgil had ever seen it. "Virgil? Where are you going?"

Virgil frowned, "you look like shit."

Logan sighed, "I know I just... had to make sure you wouldn't sneak out to the forest."

Virgil frowned, "trust me dad, I'm not."

Logan sighed in relief and leaned back, "ok. What do you need?"

Virgil looked at the small bookshelf full of photo albums, "did you have a twin brother?"

Logan froze, "Did Declan tell you?"

Virgil shook his head, "no, no, just... in the woods, I saw a man that looked like you."

Logan gasped and stood up. As he paced he muttered under his breath, "no... that's not possible... it's been ten years... he would've come back if he was alive..."

"Wait, what do you mean, 'if he was alive'?"

Logan looked at Virgil, "take me to where you saw him."

Virgil frowned, "but you sai-"

"Virgil." Logan looked to his son with tears in his eyes, "please..."

Virgil gasped, Logan NEVER cried, "yeah... yeah ok dad."

Logan nodded and walked out towards the car.

-

Logan pulled up next to the woods, where Virgil had seen the man, Roman, Logan told him.

Logan ran to the edge, never stepping past the tree line, calling Roman's name. Virgil ran after him, making sure his dad never strayed too close.

Hours after they started their search, Roman appeared. Logan glared at the sadly smiling man, and started to yell. "You... you... you IDIOT! Do you have ANY idea how much I grieved for you! Do you have any idea how you affected ALL of us? The LEAST you could've done was SHOW UP at the house but NOOOOO! Roman Sanders needs to be DRAMATIC! I thought you were DEAD!"

Roman just looked at him.

Logan broke down sobbing, "SAY something goddamnit! SAY SOMETHING TO ME COWARD!"

Roman opened his mouth, but no sound came out.

Logan frowned at him, "Roman what-?"

Roman stuck his tounge out, but it was brown and... sharp? Then Virgil realized... it wasnt his tounge.

It was a thorny vine, growing out of Roman's mouth... longer and longer until it reached the ground. Then Virgil blinked, and it was gone. Along with Roman himself.

"Dad? ...what was that?"

Logan stared at the spot Roman had been.

"Dad?"

Virgil's terrified voice snapped Logan back to reality, "get to the car..."

Virgil turned and ran without another road, Logan close behind.

-

"Dad? Where are we going?"

Logan looked back at his son, "to see the craziest person in town. The one who knows the woods the best."

Virgil nodded, and was quiet for a while before asking, "what happened to uncle Roman?"

Logan sighed, "he was an idiot, and decided that he just HAD to explore the woods. I saw him, and I didnt stop him... he only went a few feet but... he saw something... and that night he snuck out-"

"So THATS why you were waiting in the living room!"

"...yes. But, he snuck out, and I never saw him again."

"Until tonight?"

"Yeah. Until tonight."

-

Logan pulled into a house with a lawn overgrown with weird smelling plants and trees. The roof looked on the verge of collapse and the garage had fallen in on itself.

"Logan? It looks like no one lives here."

Logan shook his head, "no... he just never cleans up the outside."

Logan walked up and knocked on the door, "Picani?"

The door creaked open slowly. Virgil held his breath, expecting to see a haggard old witch.

He did not expect the beaming man who jumped at Logan to hug him. "Logi!"

Logan smiled, "Hey Emile, hows Remy?"

Emile grinned, "oh he's wonderful! Hes actually inside with Kai right now!"

Logan frowned, "Kai?"

"Our son!"

Logan gasped and smiled, "oh my god, Emile! That's wonderful!"

Virgil frowned, "I thought we were going to see the craziest person in town?"

Logan laughed, "oh yeah! Virgil, this is Dee's brother, your uncle Emile!"

Emile held out his hand, "hey there!" He frowned at Logan as he shook Virgils hand, "'craziest person in town'?"

Logan looked sheepish, "welllll-"

Emile rolled his eyes, "Remy's not crazy. Logan just thinks so because he's seen the things in the forest."

Logan became serious very quickly, "ah, speaking of, I need to speak to him."

Emile frowned, "Logi? What happened?"

Logans eyes started tearing up again, "I- I saw Roman... in the woods."

Emile frowned, "yeah, ok."

He turned and beckoned them in. Virgil followed Logan as they walked in.

-

Emile walked into the kitchen, where a man wearing sunglasses inside for some reason was trying to get a toddler to go to bed.

"Kai hon, please go to bed? You're gonna be tired and cranky tomorrow."

"But I wanna stay awake up with you and Papa!"

"I know you do sweetheart but I'm gonna go to bed soon sweetie."

Kai pouted and started tugging on his dads onesie "Daaaaaaaad!"

Emile laughed and scooped Kai up, "hes not going to bed then?"

Remy sighed and kissed his husband, "no. No he is not." He poked Kai in the stomach, "the little troublebug!"

Kai squealed, "Dad! Noooooo!"

Remy laughed, but his face quieted when he saw Logans tear-streaked face, "...Lo?"

Kai gasped, "Is that uncle Logan?"

Emile bounce Kai up and down, "why dont you join Ellie upstairs ok sweetheart?"

"Whys uncle Logan here?"

"He has to talk to Dad about something."

"Can I hear?"

"No sweetie, go join your sib upstairs."

"I-" Kai stopped talking to yawn, "I dont wanna, I'm not sleepy yet!"

"But Elliott wants you to say goodnight to them!"

Kai gasped, "can I sleep in Ellies bed?"

Emile smiled, "sure thing! Let's go ok?"

Kai nodded, smiling, "ok Papa!"

As they left Remy huffed in exasperation, "I spend thirty minutes trying to get that kid in bed and Emile does it in what? Five minutes?"

Logan laughed, "tough life my friend."

Remy turned to Logan, "so. What do you need?"

Logan sighed, "look, Remy-"

"Nope. Why are you here."

"Remy."

"I dont want to hear it. Why are you here?"

"I saw Roman."

Remy froze, "...where?"

"In the woods."

"What happened?"

"I-I yelled at him, and, and then... thorns started... started growing out of his mouth."

"Thorns?"

"Like a thorny vine."

Remy turned to Virgil, "did the kid see it too?"

"...yes."

"Ok, leave."

"Remy-"

"Its not because I'm mad at you. Its because kids are easier to read. So, out."

Logan looked at Remy for a second, "ok." He turned to his son, "dont worry, Remys a good person. I'll be right outside if it gets to much ok?"

"Ok dad."

Remy put a hand on their sunglasses, "I'm gonna take these off, dont freak out when you see my eyes, k?"

"Ok."

Remy took off his sunglasses and his eyes...

His eyes were a kaleidoscope.

Virgil shrunk under those multicolored eyes, feeling as if they were sinking into every inch of him, reading all of his experiences, all of his thoughts... all of his feelings. "Stop... stop... STOP! DAD! DAD!"

Logan burst in and grabbed Virgils shoulders, "Virgil. Virgil honey I need you to look at my eyes."

"But... but the breathing... the breathing stuff."

"Virgil."

Virgil met Logans eyes and stared into their calming blue. And his breathing slowed and clamed.

Logan glared at Remy, "Remus Orion Somnus!"

Remys eyes widened, "shiiiiiit" he said under his breath.

"Didnt you WARN HIM?"

"I- I told him not to- not to freak out but- but I-"

"That doesnt COUNT! You have to tell them about how it feels dumbass!"

Remy sneered and sat up, "I wouldnt have to if you hadnt LOST Roman!"

Logans face stilled, "Virgil. We're leaving."

Virgil looked up at Logan, "but what about Roman?"

Logan stood up, pulling Virgil gently with him, "we'll... we'll get him back some other way."

Remy got up and stalked out, "like he'd want to see YOU."

Logan stormed out, tears streaming down his face.

-

(I ran out of room so I guess this is multichaptered now? Reply is you want more.)

[foodieworldmelbourne]

Why Bianca Spender is skipping Australian fashion week

I dont think I can capture everything I want to in a traditional show format, she explains. My runways are never straight.

Cut from the same cloth ... Bianca Spender (right) with her mother, designer Carla Zampatti. Last year, Spender staged one of the standout shows at Fashion Week, featuring a diagonal series of catwalks that snaked through the crowd. The critics loved it but photographers hated not being able to capture the perfect front-on shot. Over a shared meal of grilled whiting fillets, a dish of fregola with seafood that is like a more chewy risotto, and salads, we discuss the front, back and sides view of fashion, as more people explore fashion through two-dimensional images, often on their smartphones. Spender believes social media, specifically Instagram, has had a huge change on the way people can market ideas. I feel lucky because my clothes are better in movement. When online shopping first came out and everyone was straight front, back, sides, I was like, You dont have any idea how that skirt floats or feels, and I was really struggling with working out how to translate my ideas. Movement is at the core of how Spender designs and produces her clothes, joking that skirts must pass the Martin Place test, named after the notorious wind tunnel in the Sydney CBD. Since becoming a mother to two sons, now aged seven and 10, those tests have expanded to include the carrying the baby test to determine dress lengths (Spender doesnt own a pair of jeans).

Costume collaborators ... Spender with Sydney Dance Company's Rafael Bonachela.Credit:Louise Kennerley Spenders obsession with movement was put to the ultimate test recently, when she designed the costumes for the Sydney Dance Companys 50th-anniversary production of Cinco, under artistic director Rafael Bonachela. Some of the dance movements were so physical that three costumes ripped during rehearsals, and there were many repairs required. Each [costume] fitting, the scope of movement was amazing and even if I had mimicked it I couldnt mimic what would happen to the costume when it was on [the dancers], she says.

Fregola, calamari and mussels at Totti's.Credit:Wolter Peeters Spender said the project, even if it has forced her to sacrifice other work this year, was a dream come true for the one-time ballet student. Every family photo from the age of five to 11, I am in my ballet costume. I loved it so much I wouldnt take [my costume] off, she says. I call myself the tortoise. My mum loves running fast and loves winning. Bianca Spender Spender's gazelle-like physique and flowing strawberry blonde hair means she could easily pass as a professional dancer, although she admits age and the way she moves has taken its toll on her body. I only recently realised at the physio when he asked how I move everything is always very extended, I am not holding my core very much," she says while demonstrating how she would pick up a vase off a table, arm outstretched. "I love how everything looks when its long but then you dont protect your body.

Grilled whiting fillets at Totti's.Credit:Wolter Peeters Spender grew up in Sydney the middle of three children to fashion icon Carla Zampatti and John Spender (her parents separated in 2010). She recalls living in big, spacious houses where classical music was often playing and small talk was non-existent, the family preferring to tackle politics or business at the dinner table, sometimes to the bemusement of Spenders classmates. At school she would demonstrate her eccentric fashion taste on mufti days, but it wasnt until Spender reached adulthood that she truly understood her familys notoriety in Sydney's cultural scene.

Bianca Spender has formed a reputation at fashion week for her non-linear catwalks.Credit:AAP Only years after I left school and I [reflected on] certain conflicts with certain kids that Id never understood. People would say, Well your mum is Carla Zampatti, and I was just like, Oh.

The Zampatti-Spender family on the steps of their Sydney home in 1986. Clockwise from left: John Spender, Carla Zampatti, Alex Schuman, Allegra Spender, Bianca Spender. Credit:Ian Charles Cugley/SMH My mum is pretty normal, shes a postwar immigrant. What that means to me is you have to finish all your food, you live in a beautiful house but you understand the value of money. For a pre-teen Spender, that meant school holidays spent working at her mothers inner-city office, doing every job from tea lady to banking clerk. I am the most ridiculous jaywalker because I have been walking around the city since I was eight, Spender jokes. A firsthand apprenticeship in the Carla Zampatti offices, coupled with her familys work and social ethic, meant Spender had quite a feminist upbringing. I never felt the need to answer to a man, dress for a man, or been dependent on a man for anything. They dont have to approve of how I talk, what I wear, what I earn, what I spend my money on. Last year, Spender reached another milestone when she and Zampatti divided their businesses into separate entities, including a new head office in Rushcutters Bay for Spender. The pair are clearly close, often travelling together overseas or to fashion shows in Australia (both brands are carried at David Jones, for example). But when it comes to their work practices, Spender admits they are quite different. Loading I call myself the tortoise. My mum loves running fast and loves winning. She has racing car blood in her family (both Zampattis brothers were race-car drivers) but I am about the journey. Its not that I dont want the end result to look great. You can get a good result and have a terrible journey but that doesnt mean the same to me. I am [about] the long game. Which comes back to Spenders Fashion Week dilemma. She has a big vision of a project involving 10 women who have influenced her, dressing 10 other women, using her carefully archived collections. Its still morphing but she knows it wont be ready by mid-May, when fashion week takes place. I am probably being too ambitious in what I want to achieve out of it. But at least if I am pushing myself to strive for something. I wont do what I expect and Ill find that new form. (A week after our lunch, Spender phones to say she has decided to sit out of Fashion Week and will instead stage a solo, more intimate event in early May.) Recently, Spender has experimented with salon-style showings, where she revels in getting up close with the clothing and the customer. As someone whos more comfortable at a dinner party for 10 than a cocktail function for 300, Spenders aversion to big-production shows is understandable. At least if I am pushing myself to strive for something. I wont do what I expect - and Ill find that new form. Bianca Spender At a big party, my partners wings will get bigger. Whereas if you have me at a dinner party, I am passionate put me around lots of people and they are asking, Whats wrong with you? I am so not a show pony I find shows an incredible creative process but the way you only get eight to 10 minutes to present your world I remember once saying 12 [seconds] to [stylist] Mark Vassallo and he said, No, 12 is way too long. And I said, That dress took 12 weeks to get right and I cant have it on stage for eight seconds. I want to challenge that.

The bill at Totti's. One point on which Spender and her mother are in lockstep is on the retention of Australian fashion talent (Zampatti funds a scholarship for a UTS graduate to study overseas, with the intention of them returning home). Unlike some of her peers, Spender, who worked in France and Italy in fashion for four years after completing a commerce degree, has resisted aggressively chasing sales or the limelight overseas. We know we [Australia] are leaders in sport compared to our population ... in fashion theres still a, Whats everyone else doing? attitude. New Zealand has a very strong vision for its fashion with a small population but Australia is often very outward looking. We need to find a bit more confidence in ourselves and our own vision and our own style. Our need to be revered by overseas comes from our lack of supporting ourselves and our culture Whenever [a journalist] writes on a designer, its X is stocked on [e-tailer] Net-a-Porter. Do they need to be stocked there for you to love them? A lot of people go bankrupt trying to catch the overseas dollar. I am focused on building my Australianmarket. If my international market comes quicker, great, but I am not running after it. I dont need it to prove to myself that what I do is unique and has a strong vision. THE BILL, PLEASE Totti's 283 Bondi Road, Bondi 02 9114 7371 Open: Mon-Sat 11.30am-10pm, Sun 11.30am-9pm Melissa Singer is National Fashion Editor of The Sydney Morning Herald and The Age. Most Viewed in Lifestyle Loading https://www.theage.com.au/lifestyle/fashion/why-bianca-spender-is-skipping-australian-fashion-week-20190410-p51csm.html?ref=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_source=rss_lifestyle