#if i experience an emotional bond or tender moment with another person that’s even a fraction as divine and loving as what they have +
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callsigncrash · 2 years ago
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*slams hand on table* I'm back with a odd request maybe-
Yamori and your favs ofc with a S/O /reader that has some face scars and is self conscious about it but doesn't rlly show until the Cc confesses and they're like 'why u like someone ugly like me? Like, my fave is full of scars ' or something like that
I just thought on that bcz I made a new oc and he has face scars and I got curious(for some reference I imagines something like his ones:)
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Anygays, have a great cycle of 24 hours! ^^
Lasting Experience
This one’s gonna be another Yamori exclusive! Before anyone starts reading, I myself have a lot of scars on my abdomen and my legs so I tried to write in the anxiety and judgment that you put on yourself. I love your ideas and I hope you enjoy this! ❤️
TW: Scars, self deprecation, general angst but with a happy ending.
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Having scars, especially visible ones, is not easy.
Sometimes you feel like you can forget about them then that creeping fear and anxiety of people seeing them, wondering if they look worse than they are, and so on, comes right back up.
It feels so odd to be looked at even more because you’re with Yamori. There’s already a big social pressure when being with him but it adds to the fear of how and why so many people are looking at you.
Is it the scars? Him? Both? It has you absolutely frazzled.
He notices of course.
Every time you hid your face, tried to cover them up with makeup or clothes, or brushed your hair in front of your face as much as you could, he hated it.
He didn’t want to yell or get angry with you but he was extremely frustrated at the situation itself.
He’d try to get you to go out more with him or do things that would include showing your face off just so that he could maybe encourage you to be less shy about it but when that didn’t work he knew he had to change gears.
It comes to a head one night when y’all are in your bedroom.
He catches you touching them and looking in the mirror. You’re eyes are watery and you look out of it.
He sits you down and just bluntly asks what’s wrong (in less kind terms)?
“Why do you like someone ugly like me? My face is full of scars…”
You don’t think you’d ever seen his eyes grow as wide as they did in that moment. He almost looked shocked then there was a flash of anger. This was quickly replaced with an emotion that you couldn’t name.
His large hand enveloped the side of your face, his thumb stroking your cheek. He let out a soft sigh.
He may never be as tender again after this moment but it’s ok because after this, there’s no question about if he truly cares because he definitely does.
He spends the night telling you how much he loves every single one and how much they help define your strength as a person.
He would never look at your scars and think they’re ugly. They’re your story, your experiences, they’re just you. He loves you and he loves them.
Each scar is perfect to him.
It’s the golden bond on a once broken vase and there’s nothing that can compare to that beauty. Your beauty.
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alfredtangphoto · 2 years ago
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In-home newborn lifestyle session // Baby Andreas, The Eriksons
When I first started my photography business, I set to carve out my brand to be one of telling emotionally-invoking stories of human connections through photographs that stood the test of time. Connection session (aka engagement sessions) and weddings helped fulfilled this and thus steered my brand towards this portion of the market. But as I watched my clients and friends add members to their families, and as I thought about my own childhood and relationship with my mother, I began to realize something I’ve already known: having and raising children in it’s own is a different type of emotional love story that is usually unconditional. And one, where both parents learn a lot more about themselves and one another. These new parents are literally carrying out the words spoken during their wedding vows of committing to being by each other’s side on “this crazy journey called life”.
“Children are the reintroduction of the unsullied paradise of being.” - Dr. Jordan Peterson
All this to say that this is why I don’t advertise family sessions as they’re typically the standard family-posed type of shots that doesn’t really tell an emotionally invoking story that “fits my brand” (but still are important to the family!). These sessions are typically reserved for previous wedding clients, friends or from personal referrals. But then, an email from Helena’s mother led to a session that would alter the way I viewed the interpretation of my brand and my journey of telling love stories.
I’ve worked with Helena & Jasper a number of times, documenting some of their most special life events (even took Jasper’s headshot for his med school application!), so when I was presented the opportunity to document the new addition to their family, I was ecstatic! Not just because Helena & Jasper are sweet and awesome people who deserve nothing but the best, but because becoming new parents is a very transformational pivot point in their lives - teaching you things about life and love that no other life experiences can. I wanted to document the beginning of this unconditional love and bond with their 8-week old human.
Let me tell you, this half hour session was one of the most sweet, tender and magical moments I’ve ever had the privilege to witness. I won’t say why as I hope the images from this in-home newborn lifestyle session will do all the talking. Thank you Helena & Jasper for inviting me into your home and photographing another intimate and pivotal point in your lives. You guys will be the best parents and I already know Andreas will be the best big brother other siblings will be jealous of!
“The family you create is more important than the family you came from.” I said what I said! While this statement is subjective and debatable, there’s an awful lot of truth in it.
If you have enjoyed this Portland newborn lifestyle session, I’d appreciate a comment or a share! If you’re interested in working together on your family session, click the button below to get in touch with me!
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egyptianhoney · 2 months ago
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Growing pains (on friendship)
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When I first moved to London in September, I subletted a room in a flat in Hoxton. I found the room through someone I had met in Montreal, and she then became my first friend in the city. We bonded over going to car-boots, playing board games in her flat, getting ready together for a night out watching Sex and the City, and long conversations under the heated lamps of the De Beauvoir Arms.
Our friendship grew quickly. I remember walking home, tipsy off orange wine, where we chatted endlessly. We had an intimate understanding, and it was refreshing for both of us to candidly discuss our traumas, particularly our mutual experiences with an abusive partner. In those moments, we both needed to reveal those things we’ve never said out loud, those violent memories we once kept in a box, chiseled as grief within our bodies
It's easy to write about falling in love, but difficult to express coherently the moments in a budding friendship where love begins. I hesitate to call that phenomenon “falling in love,” as it is still different, while “platonically falling in love” is gawky. One doesn’t surely love all of their friends either.
My sublet was over by the end of October. A mutual friend from Montreal was coincidentally moving to London, and remarkably found a flat in South Bermondsey with 2 available rooms. She joined at the end of November. I had a few more months of experience in the city, so I wanted to help her with the transition.  We got to know one another through setting up bank or NHS accounts, laughing in the home section of Big Tesco in Surrey Quays, or trying the local Chinese takeaways. 
Spending time with her was always an adventure. Whether we were obnoxiously spotting Joe Jonas after a night out in Camden, trying to find the best bagels, laughing our way around machines at the gym, or exploring the city with the fond sound of heeled boots clacking on the pavement. Or even, just simply spending time together in the flat, experiencing our new lives at the same time. Because of her, I will always remember that grim, frigid first winter in the city as bright and full of warmth. 
In All About Love (1999), bell hooks constructs a powerful understanding of love as a word defined most fundamentally by its meaning as a verb. To hooks, love is an intentional, continuous act—“the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual and emotional growth.” Love does not simply denote feelings of tenderness. Like planting a small seed, love sprouts remarkably out of the soil. With sustained intention, it can grow into a beautiful tree amongst the forest of the loves within one’s life.
In Arabic, there are at least 24 words for love. Hub, the root word of Habibi is used the most frequently and universally. Ishiq centres the passion between intimate lovers, while gharam describes the devotion. Whereas khula or al-wad specifically refer to friendliness and platonic bonds. Like love, there are degrees to friendship in Arabic. From jalis, someone that you sit or share social space with, to khalil, a close friend. 
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It’s difficult to identify the initial moments in which those friendships began to fall apart. When I moved to South London, it was difficult making plans with the girl in Hoxton. After numerous miscommunications, we haven’t seen each other in months. In March, I moved back to Hoxton and I was excited to become neighbours again. When I got a flat tire in Whitechapel riding my bike to my new flat, she was even the first person to pick up the keys. Regardless, our relationship never recovered and I haven’t seen her in months. 
As I started making more friends, it became increasingly apparent how incompatible me and the girl from Montreal were. We began to get into heated arguments, often over the most random subjects. When I moved back to Hoxton, we were no longer able to have those spontaneous adventures, because instead of just knocking on each others doors to see if we wanted to go grab dinner, we needed to be very intentional with our plans.
To lose a friend, to uproot one of those trees, even if still a sapling, leaves a profound wound on that forest. A forest can still thrive after its loss, and uses the detritus to create new, stronger trees. Not all friendships create deep lasting roots. Regardless of the aftermath or universality of the experience, the wound itself is felt.
I choose not to write bitterly about moments in which I was hurt, because multiple truths can exist even if in opposition, and thus I choose to intentionally leave more space for tenderness in my memory. But, just as detritus makes for strong fertilizer, I’m writing this to reflect on my own mistakes—so I can become a better friend too. 
In her framework, hooks highlights the fundamental role of self-love. To love oneself requires an honest self-awareness, to push yourself to grow. And just as it was as a child, growing can be painful—but it is both beautiful and neccesary.
To be self-aware, I am writing this to also honour the ways in which I was and continue to be a wonderful friend. And as I grow, make new connections or grow deeper roots with the friends I have, my love grows into a lush forest. 
While I’m biking home from work, on my one-year anniversary of living in London, I think about the friends that I’ve lost. I wonder if there are still any roots left, or a stump that can be salvaged and tended to. Maybe our brief time together was all we needed, the maximum we could have extended ourselves to one another, and maybe those types of friendships are beautiful in their own right. Maybe we were only friends when it was simpler, and struggled when it required confrontations and intentional effort. Maybe it wasn’t love, hob or khalil, but maybe we were just sharing space in this life for a fleeting moment, jalis. 
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On a random street in Islington, I stop by the path. A car honks at me at speeds past. I’m looking up at all the beautiful trees, creating a canopy over the road, orange and red leaves fall, while small critters rummage around the piles. I realize, my life is filled with love. I love my friends that I’ve made in the past year, and I love the friends I’ve made before. I love the city and the life that I'm living.
My life is filled with love because I too, am filled with love. 
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serenasmith5bolg · 3 months ago
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Capture your love story with intimate and elegant boudoir couple photography
In a world where love stories come in all shapes and forms, there is a unique way to celebrate the beauty of your relationship: boudoir couple photography. This intimate art form allows couples to express their love, vulnerability, and connection creatively and elegantly. Whether you're looking to commemorate an anniversary, a special occasion, or simply capture the magic of your bond, boudoir photography for couples offers an extraordinary opportunity to showcase your love story through beautiful imagery.
What is Boudoir Couple Photography?
Boudoir couple photography takes traditional boudoir concepts and incorporates them into stunning portraits featuring two people in love. This photography style focuses on the intimate moments shared between partners, capturing the essence of their relationship in a beautifully artistic way. From playful and fun poses to romantic and tender moments, boudoir photography couples can reflect the range of emotions that come with being in love.
Why Choose Boudoir Photography for Couples?
1. Celebration of Love: Every love story is unique, and boudoir photography allows you to celebrate your journey in a way that's personal and meaningful. These visuals will remind you of the special connection you share.
2. Building Confidence: Engaging in boudoir photography can help instill confidence in both partners. Stepping in front of the camera together, embracing your bodies, and showcasing your love for one another creates a powerful bond and appreciation for one another.
3. Memorable Keepsakes: The images captured in a boudoir photoshoot are timeless keepsakes. They tell your love story through breathtaking visuals and can be cherished for years to come.
4. A Fun Experience: Boudoir photography is often remembered as a fun and playful experience. Whether you're joking around in front of the camera or finding those intimate moments together, the session itself can deepen your connection.
Tips for Beautiful Boudoir Photography
To ensure your boudoir couple photography session turns out as beautiful as you envision, consider the following tips:
1. Choose the Right Photographer
Finding a professional photographer experienced in boudoir photography for couples is crucial. Browse their portfolios to ensure their style aligns with your vision. Look for someone who makes you feel comfortable and resonates with your idea of intimacy.
2. Set the Mood
Before the session, consider the vibe you want to achieve. Do you want a romantic atmosphere filled with soft lighting and muted colors, or something more vibrant and playful? Setting the right mood will help you relax and enjoy the experience.
3. Coordinate Outfits
Select outfits that complement each other. You don't need to wear matching clothing, but aligning colors and styles can create a cohesive look. Whether you opt for elegant lingerie, casual wear, or even something themed, make sure you feel good in what you choose.
4. Communicate Your Vision
Talk to your photographer about what you hope to capture during the session. Share any specific ideas you have, such as particular poses or locations, so they can plan how best to represent your love story.
5. Be Yourself
One of the most beautiful aspects of boudoir photography couples is the authenticity that shines through. Be open and genuine in your interactions, allowing your love for one another to illuminate the photos. Candid moments often turn out to be the most captivating.
Showcase Your Beautiful Boudoir Photography
Once your boudoir couple photography session is complete, it's time to showcase your love story. Consider creating an album that tells your journey together, including memories, notes, and the stunning images captured during the shoot. You could also select your favorites to frame as wall art, turning your home into a gallery of love.
Additionally, sharing select images on social media (with respect for privacy) can inspire other couples to celebrate their love stories in beautiful and intimate ways.
Boudoir couple photography is more than just a photo shoot; it's a celebration of love, trust, and connection. It provides a unique opportunity to capture your beautiful love story in a way that highlights intimacy and elegance. If you're considering a boudoir photography session, remember that the experience itself can strengthen your relationship and leave you with beautiful keepsakes to cherish forever. So grab your partner, embrace your love, and let the world see the beauty that lies in your love story.
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ethereacinth · 1 year ago
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BLOG #4: BOOK REVIEW
Title: I love you since 1892
Author: Binibining Mia
Genre: Historical, Drama, Romance, Tragedy
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"I Love You Since 1892" by Binibining Mia is a captivating historical romance novel that intertwines the lives of two individuals across different eras.  With an intriguing title that hints at a century-spanning love story, the book's cover perfectly captures the essence of the narrative, drawing readers in with its delicate and nostalgic design. The story follows the journey of the protagonist, a young woman who discovers a mysterious diary that transports her back to the late 19th century. There, she encounters a charismatic young man with whom she develops a deep connection. As the narrative unfolds, the reader is immersed in a tale of forbidden love, fate, and the enduring power of their bond. The novel explores the complexities of their relationship as they navigate societal expectations, personal sacrifices, and the challenges of love across time. Through skillful storytelling, Binibining Mia, the talented author behind this enchanting tale, brings to life a rich historical backdrop and a cast of compelling characters, all while delving into themes of love, destiny, and the indomitable spirit of true love.
Binibining Mia skillfully crafts a narrative that effortlessly shifts between two different time periods, namely the late 19th century and the present day. Through meticulous attention to detail and vivid descriptions, the author creates an immersive world that allows readers to experience the social and cultural contexts of both eras. The story unfolds with a series of mysterious events and unexpected encounters, keeping readers hooked from start to finish.
The novel introduces a diverse range of characters each with their own unique struggles, desires, and secrets. The protagonist- Carmela, portrayed with depth and complexity, undergoes personal growth and transformation as she navigates through the challenges of love and self-discovery. Supporting characters add depth to the narrative, bringing their own conflicts and perspectives, and ultimately contributing to the intricate web of relationships that span across time.
At its core, "I Love You Since 1892" explores the themes of love and destiny, questioning whether love can truly transcend time and societal boundaries. The author adeptly explores the complexities of love, from the intense passion and heartache to the delicate moments of tenderness and longing. Through the interactions between the characters, Binibining Mia delves into the notion of soulmates and the interconnectedness of lives, leaving readers contemplating the power of fate in matters of the heart.
Moreover, Binibining Mia's storytelling prowess shines throughout the novel. The seamless transitions between past and present, along with the intricate plot twists and turns, demonstrate the author's ability to keep readers guessing and engaged. The prose is eloquent and evocative, painting vivid imagery that transports readers to the different time periods and evokes a range of emotions. The author's attention to historical detail adds authenticity to the narrative, further enhancing the overall reading experience.
Furthermore, the author skillfully incorporates poignant lines that add depth and emotional resonance to the narrative. One such line, "Kahit hindi ka pa pinapanganak sa panahong ito.. Ikaw pa rin ang mamahalin ko" (Even if you haven't been born in this time... I will still love you), perfectly encapsulates the central theme of "I Love You Since 1892." It speaks to a love that transcends the constraints of time and defies conventional boundaries. This quote beautifully reflects the deep and unwavering affection between the characters, surpassing the limitations of their temporal existence. It serves as a powerful reminder of the enduring power of love that threads its way through the narrative, weaving together the lives of the characters across different eras.
Another line, "Huwag mo sanang kakalimutan na kahit anong mangyari at sa kahit anong lugar, hihintayin kita" (Please don't forget that no matter what happens and wherever it may be, I will wait for you), captures the essence of patience, devotion, and the unyielding nature of love depicted in the novel. It portrays one character's unwavering commitment to waiting for their beloved, regardless of the circumstances or distance that may separate them. This quote reinforces the underlying message of the story - that love transcends time and space, and the enduring connection between souls cannot be easily broken. It serves as a poignant reminder of the unbreakable bond that exists between the characters, even in the face of adversity and the passage of time.
These quotations not only contribute to the emotional depth of the narrative but also emphasize the central themes explored in "I Love You Since 1892". They serve as powerful reminders of the novel's core message - the enduring and all-encompassing nature of love that transcends time and place. Binibining Mia's skillful storytelling, intertwined with these profound lines, resonates with readers, reminding us of the timeless power of love and the unyielding connection between souls, regardless of the circumstances in which they find themselves.
Overall, as a reader, your experience with "I Love You Since 1892" may leave you with mixed emotions. The bittersweet ending, where the characters' love is constrained by the passage of time, may leave you feeling a sense of sadness and longing. You may find yourself yearning for a more conclusive resolution, hoping that the characters find a way to be together despite the temporal obstacles that stand in their path. However, this lingering sadness also speaks to the power of the story and the emotional investment you have in the characters' journey.
For other readers who are considering diving into "I Love You Since 1892," I highly recommend it for those who appreciate immersive historical romance novels with a touch of mystery and fate. Binibining Mia's storytelling prowess, combined with the vividly portrayed characters and intricate plot, creates an unforgettable reading experience. Be prepared to embark on an emotional rollercoaster as you navigate the complexities of love and destiny alongside the characters. While the ending may leave you with a tinge of sadness, the journey itself is well worth the read.
For readers who enjoy historical romance novels with a touch of time travel, "I Love You Since 1892" will undoubtedly captivate and move you. It is a novel that will leave you pondering the intricacies of fate and the resilience of the human heart long after you've turned the final page.
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younggrim · 1 year ago
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Dreams and Growth. 🔭
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“Dream big, work hard, and never let anyone dim your light.”
From humble beginnings to standing on some of the biggest stages, I want to take you through the highs and lows, the challenges and triumphs, and the dreams that have fueled my passion for music and performance.
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Nurturing the Seed of Passion.
As I take you back to the serene landscapes of South Jeolla Province, South Korea, allow me to paint a vivid picture of my early days. Nestled in a cozy neighborhood, my journey began in a humble household filled with love, support, and dreams waiting to unfold. From a tender age, I found solace and joy in the world of music and dance. The melodies of popular songs would capture my heart, and I would find myself effortlessly moving to the rhythm, lost in a world of expression. My bedroom became my sanctuary, a space where my imagination soared, and my talents took root.
In those sacred hours, I would practice diligently, driven by an insatiable hunger to improve my skills. Every step, every note became a canvas for my dreams, and I poured my heart and soul into every movement. The mirror became my faithful companion, reflecting my determination and guiding me towards perfection. It was during one such intimate moment, bathed in the soft glow of a flickering lamp, that the realization struck me like a bolt of lightning. Performing was more than just a hobby—it was my true calling. The rush of adrenaline coursing through my veins as I danced, the thrill of hitting the right note, and the way music ignited a fire within me—I knew I had found my purpose.
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“Produce 48”: A Turning Point.
As I stepped onto the stage for the first time, a whirlwind of emotions overwhelmed me. Nervousness and excitement mingled within me, as I knew that this platform held the potential to catapult my dreams into reality. The energy in the air was electric, with each contestant pouring their heart and soul into every performance. Amidst the fierce competition, I formed deep bonds with the other aspiring artists. We shared dreams, fears, and the common understanding of the challenges we were about to face. Together, we encouraged and supported one another, becoming a united front against the pressures and uncertainties that surrounded us.
The journey on "Produce 48" was an invaluable experience that shaped me both as an artist and as an individual. It taught me the power of resilience, the importance of teamwork, and the ability to thrive under pressure. The friendships I forged and the lessons I learned continue to resonate deeply within me, serving as a reminder of the extraordinary moments that unfolded during that transformative period. In the upcoming chapters, we will delve into the next steps of my journey—the debut with my fellow members and the exhilarating challenges that awaited us as we stepped into the vibrant world of K-pop. Join me as we uncover the triumphs, the setbacks, and the incredible growth that unfolded on this remarkable path.
Like I said, “Believe in yourself, even when others doubt you. Your potential is limitless.”
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Blossoming with IZ*ONE.
As we dove headfirst into the world of K-pop, our days became a beautiful symphony of hard work, dedication, and dreams coming to life. The rigorous schedule demanded our utmost commitment, leaving no room for complacency. We pushed our limits, embracing countless hours of dance practices, vocal training, and personal growth. The camaraderie that flourished within IZ*ONE became the backbone of our journey. We became not just teammates, but a family bound by our shared dreams and aspirations. Together, we laughed, cried, and supported each other through the highs and lows that came with being in the spotlight.
The support and love from our fans became the pillar that upheld us during both the exhilarating and challenging times. Their unwavering dedication and passion fueled our determination to continuously improve and deliver performances that would leave an indelible mark on the K-pop industry. The journey with IZ*ONE was an extraordinary chapter in my life, one that I will forever cherish. The growth, the laughter, the tears, and the countless memories we created together have become an integral part of my artistic identity. I am immensely grateful for the opportunities, the lessons, and the profound connections that were forged during this chapter of my journey.
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Beyond the Stage.
Balancing multiple careers, however, came with its own set of challenges. Juggling music and modeling required meticulous time management, unwavering focus, and a deep commitment to both crafts. It demanded a level of discipline and adaptability as I transitioned between various roles and immersed myself in different creative environments. While music remained my true passion, the foray into modeling allowed me to develop a broader perspective on the entertainment industry. It provided me with a deeper understanding of the artistic collaborations that occur behind the scenes, and the dedication required to bring a vision to life. It also gave me a newfound appreciation for the artistry and craftsmanship that goes into fashion.
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A Journey of Self-Discovery.
One of the most exhilarating aspects of this journey was the eagerness to explore and experiment with music in ways I had never done before. The freedom to express my creativity and delve into different genres allowed me to push the boundaries of my artistry. It was a chance to discover the depths of my voice, to unravel hidden facets of my performance, and to connect with the music on a more intimate level.
The creative process became a remarkable voyage of self-discovery. Collaborating with my fellow members, we embarked on a collective journey to create music that resonated with our individuality and captured the essence of IVE. It was a beautiful tapestry of ideas, melodies, and emotions, each member contributing their unique perspective and strengths to shape our sound.
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Evolution of Sound and Style.
As an artist, I believe in the power of versatility and the freedom to experiment with different genres. IVE’s musical pallette encompasses a wide range of styles, allowing us to explore diverse sounds and push the boundaries of our creativity. From powerful dance tracks that ignite the stage to introspective ballads that touch the depths of the soul, each song is a canvas for us to express our emotions, aspirations, and story.
Again. I said, “Challenges are opportunities in disguise. Embrace them, learn from them, and grow stronger.”
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The Power of Unity.
I will express the deep connection I have cultivated with my fellow members, the unwavering support and motivation we offer each other, and the remarkable growth we have experienced as a cohesive team. I will underscore the collaborative essence that ignites our creativity and the collective purpose that propels us on our journey.
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Conclusion.
I’ll reflect on the invaluable lessons I’ve learned, the resilience I’ve developed, and the joy that music brings to my life. Together with my fellow members and the support of our fans, I’m ready to face the challenges, celebrate the successes, and create a legacy that will inspire generations to come.
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athenianwit · 7 months ago
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love was something atticus never thought he would be able to experience, it wasn't something given to him by anyone in his family when he grew up so he didn't know what it meant to have someone care for you the way romeo loved him. on top of that, atticus had been in such denial over who he was and unknowingly locking those parts of himself away for most of his life... he'd never been able to connect to audrey. seeing the relationship his father and stepmother had, atticus assumed that was just how marriages worked in the real world. since coming to camp, atticus quickly learned those epic romances and loves he used to read about were real. not only did atticus discover that he could be loved, but he was stronger because of it. 
there were so many people here at camp he was growing to love, atticus had a unique bond with each person and that didn't mean his love for any of the others any less than. they weren't confined to the rigid, heteronormative, and monagmous system that all of them had grown up. like their parents, the godlings could feel love in their own unique way. romeo, however, was the first person he said 'i love you' too. the son of zeus was the most passionate person atticus knew and was the one who could make him feel alive, the one who could make atticus feel every emotion all at once. 
the two stood in silence for a moment, the only noises were the sounds of the wildlife around them and the faint sound of music from the party back at camp. just like the first night the two of them spent together. he understood that most of the other godlings probably loved this spot but this was their spot, the place he'd always find himself coming back to. their lips met for another kiss, this one was far more tender and soft than the last one. with every day that now passed, atticus worried it would be the last time he would taste those lips he knew all too well now. 
even know, atticus was self aware enough to know he wasn't thinking logically. he'd battled thorson with some of the camps strongest godlings and they barely made it out alive, he stood no chance against any of them on his own. the rage filling him didn't care, though. for te first time, athena's fury was inside him. they already killed alejandro and nearly took the lives of remy and silas. would they come back to finish the job? corrupt the rest of the camp? or simply just finish the job and kill all of them? "i-" he was caught off, romeo was the reasonable and calm one in this situation. "i know they're stronger." his voice calms down, almost defeated. "they've already taken so much from us. i won't let them take you from me." his hands cupped romeo's face, looking into those green eyes that he'd studied so many times before. although they looked tired, the son of athena could still see the storm within romeo. weakened but still there. 
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"corrupted... that word worries me, romeo." he sighed, resting his forehead against the others to try and not let his thoughts consume him. maybe he'd go to the library and research all of this tomorrow morning if he didn't have to take care of anyone. "okay, we'll go talk to her. she might know what we can do."
he couldn't lose romeo, not after everything the two of them had gone through together. "thank you for telling me." atticus' fingers brushed a curl out of the others face. "and thank you for always coming back to me." 
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there's a part of romeo that will always think he's not deserving of atticus, a part of him that will think of love and wonder if he was created to witness it and never truly connect with it. he lives his life on a razor's edge, a constant state of wondering when the blade will cut the string attached to them and leave him drifting away on a gust of wind. his childhood had never been about love. all love brought was pain, if he could even call that love. it was an absence, it was something inside of him that wanted to belong but had a hard time shifting the chemistry of his insides to settle against his heart.
atticus had changed that. remy had changed that. it doesn't make romeo any less likely to think they'll leave for someone else, or each other, than it did before all of this.
he's learning, though. he's growing. he's allowing himself the capacity to feel what he feels, including the jealousy. that had been unexpected. atticus is a man that many could fall in love with, he's sure that many have, and watching the son of the weaver spin his tapestry of emotions, connecting himself to more and more and more people was a hard pill to swallow. romeo, the boy who never knew what love could feel like, had felt like he deserved to be the only one for atticus. it's a selfish thing to think, but it had been a fleeting thought, a bolt of lightning illuminating his skies, until he realized that he, too, could have more.
love, he's found, isn't solely meant to be held by one person.
romeo inhales the familiar scent of atticus as their foreheads press together. it's calming, soothing, a balm on all the anxiety that's been flat ironed against his skin, pressed between his shoulder blades. "we are." romeo confirms, tilting his head to press a gentle kiss to atticus' lips, letting them rest there for a lingering moment. he doesn't know what he would do or who he would be without atticus in his life, by his side. so many times he's nearly untethered himself, lost himself to the hurricane inside of him and atticus welby has been one of the voices that calls him home, that sings to the song within his veins until their harmonies are the only sound his ears can hear.
his eyes lock onto atticus' as the realization hits the son of athena, the fear and anger in his voice ring throughout the space. he lets atticus feel it. he knows how important that is. "no." he says, shaking his head. "i don't, we can't fight them. they're too strong. not now." romeo says, his voice soft, just above a whisper. both hands reach forward, fingers digging into atticus' clothes to hold him close. he wanted an anchor, he needed one, and he didn't want atticus to run away. not now, not ever. "my father, zeus, he said they're corrupted. i think—i know—that we can cure them." he squeezes his fingers into the fabric. "i can't risk you. not to him."
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"we will." romeo says after a moment of silence. he inhales and holds it, trying to count to ten but failing to do so. his chest aches, he's exhausted. "as soon as xanthe is back, i'm going to have her look me over and see if she can figure anything out. right now, i feel okay. it feels...more like a curse than anything. something is wrong and i know that, but i'll do whatever it takes to fix it."
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awindylife-writes · 2 years ago
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This Time Around (Chapter 1)
(here), Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10 (ongoing)
Relationship: third Doctor x reader, Sarah x reader (platonic), Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart x reader (platonic)
Summary: You crash at UNIT headquarters in 1980 (ish) after an adventure goes wrong with the tenth Doctor.
Warnings: graphic description of injuries
Author's notes: l finally pulled myself together and posted this. l love this fic so much and l've spent so much time on it, now l get to share it with you. I can't really believe this is happening. Tell me what you think. (Don't know how often l'll update this, l hope l'll manage to post once a week but we'll see) The concepts of bond-mates and visible personal timelines belong to @inthisformiambadwolf.
~
"Here, this is a complete list of the equipment l'll need." The Doctor handed Alistair a sheet of paper.
It was a slow day at UNIT headquarters. The laboratory was in the state of orderly disorder the Doctor preferred when conducting research and the TARDIS stood in its usual corner, silently waiting for another getaway. The Doctor was glad Sarah had come around to see if there was anything to write about and had kindly accepted his invitation to stay for the afternoon. Even if the occasional experiment went up in flames, it was alright with her around because she laughed at it, then helped him try again.
"Very well, you'll get it all as soon as possible," the Brigadier replied with a hint of a smile.
"Doctor, what exactly are you trying to build?" Sarah pointedly looked at the pile of half-assembled machinery on the counter they were all gathered around.
"Well, it's supposed to be a polarizing-"
A blinding flash of white light illuminated the room. All three of them whipped around to stare in shock at the woman who had appeared out of thin air less than three steps in front of them.
The Doctor's eyes immediately focused on the horrific wound on your temple, on the mass of glistening blood which had run down the side of your face to coat your shoulder with crimson. Your hands were pressed to your chest in a soothing embrace, the right one clutching something on the other wrist with a quivering grip, and your whole body trembled with exhaustion. When he looked up, he saw your sweaty face was expressionless and your half-lidded eyes didn't note any of the people in front of you, lost in the shock of what had happened. Loose strands of hair swirled around your head while you swayed on the spot.
"Are you alright?" Sarah gasped and you blinked, your clouded gaze snapping to her as your arms slowly let go of each other.
At the same time, the Doctor gradually moved forward, careful not to frighten you. "How can we help you?" he asked in worry.
Eyes narrowing, you parted your chapped lips to say something and tried to shakily step towards them, but your balance betrayed you. Your body veered too much to the right, your knees gave out and you started falling, but the Doctor was right there, catching you in his arms. He lowered both of you to the ground with you carefully held in his lap and your head on his shoulder.
"What happened to you?" he demanded in a half-whisper. "What can we do?"
You simply blinked up at the Doctor with the same lost look, but in a single moment, your eyes went wide and your whole face lit up in elated recognition. Your brows furrowed in disbelief but a smile bloomed on your lips, warm and bright and sparking something soft deep inside him, She knows me, she knows me to the core, your brilliant eyes tender and oh so fond. This was for him, this was his and he was left to watch in awe, lost and quite impossibly, found.
The Brigadier suddenly felt sorry for watching because whatever this was, it was obviously meant only for the Doctor, and no one else.
The air between you was charged. As your trembling hand slowly rose towards his face, there was an emotion, a truth so great your eyes couldn't contain it, so you sighed one simple, blissfully soft word. "Doctor."
(Later, Sarah realized it had sounded a lot like 'home'.)
The Doctor gasped for breath but before he could say anything, before your hand reached his cheek, your bright eyes fell shut, your arm fell to your stomack and you laid still. He immmediately sobered up.
"Infirmary. Now," he ordered as he carefully gathered you in his arms and rushed out the door with Sarah-Jane and the Brigadier on his heels.
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fragilevixenfic · 3 years ago
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My AO3 Fanfiction Links (Current)
“I’ve never really thought about making a “Master List” of my own work but I figured, now is the time to do so. If any of the links are incorrect just let me know. I fix. 
Adding in a “keep reading” tab because the list is starting to get long and intense.
Each fic is categorized and easily referenced. I’ll update as I go.
X Files
Series
Into The Shadows
XII (COMPLETE): A serial killer targets victims and leaves behind symbols of his affection -- but who is his intended target and what will it take to discover the truth? (This has a lot of trigger warnings)
Dance In The Dark (ONGOING Chapters 12/? Posted **UPDATED):  With the continuing murder trial of Miles, Mulder, Scully, and Max are confronted by the VCU with a case that seems to be mimicking the pattern by their, now infamous, psychopath on trial.
Echoes and Whispers
Parallel (COMPLETE):  The aftermath of the three little words that Mulder says to Scully in his hospital bed after being rescued from the Queen Anne as it re-appeared in the Bermuda Triangle...and the strange connection that Scully starts to feel to a memory that Scully couldn't possibly have.
Only The Night (ONGOING):  Mulder and Scully begin their undercover assignment as an engaged couple with the assistance of Skinner at the University of Maryland to catch a serial rapist, putting their newly formed physical bond to the test in this sequel to “Parallel”.
Casefics
Falling Away (COMPLETE):  Kersh’s assignment partially splits the team as Scully goes undercover under the watchful eye of Mulder as they both assist on an operation with SWAT and FBI personnel. (A gift for Greta)
Veritas se revēlet (COMPLETE):  (The title is roughly translated to let the truth be revealed in Latin) An impromptu wild goose chase leads Mulder and Scully to the drifts of a winter-locked Tonopah, Nevada—where a little more than the embodiment of Mulder’s imagination takes shape between the walls of the Mizpah Hotel in the dead of winter. (A gift for @monikafilefan)
She Walks at Night (COMPLETE):  Mulder’s knack for getting himself and Scully into sticky situations leads them to the heart of NOLA at the tail end of Hurricane season after barely surviving a Floridian storm—to investigate a rumor of a notable Voodoo Queen and missing girls trying to bring her back. (A gift for @starbuck09256)
Intrigues in the Dark (COMPLETE):   A string of suicides leads Mulder and Scully to a sleepy, coastal town in Oregon for the second time—on their return to The X File—as tensions run high and nothing is as it seems. (A gift for @admiralty-xfd)
By Light, Unseen (COMPLETE):   A series of re-opened cold case murders with one link…they’d been drained of every drop of blood and wore the same, haunting stare toward the sky with their lips aghast as if they were still screaming. (A gift for @serahsanguine)
Post-Series
A House is Not a Home (COMPLETE):  The mere thought of raising a newborn in a world full of horrors has every part of Scully’s emotional irrationality over firing on a chilly, winter evening. Mulder wants nothing more than to show her that not everything is gray and grim. (for @danceswithcybermen)
Remember the Reason (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 1 of the “Little Redhead Series”). Mulder and Scully already knew that life with a newborn would be difficult but the first Christmas with their two-month-old daughter throws every curveball…some worse than others, some more humorous. (For @underworldobsessed)
Confectioners Sugar & Snow Drifts (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 2 of the “Little Redhead Series”). Mulder spends the morning bonding with Eliana by having a Christmas baking session while Scully is out shopping for gifts. Messes, mayhem, and a healthy dose of laughter ensue. No moment is ever dull as the snow falls outside.
The Easter Bunny was a Fox (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 3 of the “Little Redhead” Series). Scully has to pick up Bill, Tara, and a couple of surprise family from the airport, leaving Mulder alone with their 6-year-old daughter, Eliana, on Easter Morning. All she has for him are curiosities as Easter’s non-Christian ideology unfolds before her eyes…creating the most unique bonding opportunity for a father and his daughter. (For Flicked_Switch)
Angst/UST/RST
Caught in the Rain (COMPLETE):  A dark, rainy night leads Mulder and Scully to a hole in the wall bar where glasses of Scotch and unresolved tension is re-visited.
Or We Can Burn (COMPLETE):  Post Never Again - expansion and continuation of the aftermath surrounding what Scully has been hiding from Mulder.
It Lingers (COMPLETE):  The aftermath of trauma and the lingering effects of Mulder’s risky attempt to recover the truth about Samantha’s abduction leads to a revelation from Scully about her own coping mechanisms and flashes into a past she doesn’t fully remember...and the path to which they lead thereafter. (For @red2007)
Fluff/Humor
Nervous Laughter (COMPLETE):  It’s been two full days since their tender, albeit brief, moment at the stroke of midnight and Mulder decides to be brave and methodical by inviting Scully over for a little movie and popcorn night for a film that has stayed locked in his mind as her favorite—The Exorcist. (This is a gift for @rationalcashew)
Lamplight & Shooting Stars (COMPLETE):  It’s Spring-time in DC and spontaneous, mutually taken vacation time has become a personal mission of Mulder’s to surprise Scully with so much more than an escape from their norm—and the unseasonable, uncomfortable city heat. (For @underworldobsessed)
Into the Nightlife (ONGOING):  A little paid vacation time never hurt anyone, right? (Not giving anything away this time)
Smut
Insomniac (COMPLETE):  Another lonely, sleepless night, another dingy motel, and another town that isn’t home for Mulder…but, something changed, with the last gasp of the air conditioner as his partner, and best friend, chooses to walk through the adjoining door. (Expanded writing exercise)
Vultus in Speculo (COMPLETE):  The last of the paperwork on the Strickland case has been finalized and filed and Scully goes off for a drink at a known FBI watering hole. Mulder is invited but doesn’t show up until after Scully is halfway through a drink—giving him an opening to inquire about a whole lot more than her flirtations with the Sheriff in the booth of a rooftop bar. (written for @msrheadcanon
Phosphorescence (COMPLETE):  Still reeling from their experience in North Carolina, Mulder and Scully take a much-needed excursion to the coast of Oregon, where a flicker of light becomes more than a curiosity in the middle of the night. (Written for @anniexami)
The Darker Side of Love (COMPLETE): Mulder does not want to talk but he does not want Scully to leave, either. (This is for the MSR fanzine vol 3)
Ficlets/Drabbles/Short Prompt Collection
Affirmations and Protestations: “Fluff and Angst” Prompts (ONGOING):  
 Chapter 1 - "You Weren't Supposed to Hear That" - prompt #5, 61, 77
Chapter 2 - "Shout!" - prompt #19, 61 (From Valerie)
Chapter 3 - "Litost" - prompt #1, 85, 97 (From Monika)
Chapter 4 - "Ad Infinitum" - prompt #42 (From Minuete)
Chapter 5 - "Brick" - prompt - After Scully calls Mulder in the ep Emily, she asks him to bring her some things from home. Her journal falls to the floor and Mulder sees some things written about him that she has never allowed him to know. (from Monika)
Chapter 6 - "I'd rather be oblivious" - prompt #46 (from Annie)
Criminal Minds
Angst/UST/RST
Dulce Periculum (COMPLETE):  Maxine and Spencer have continued seeing each other, in spite of the interference brought to the surface by Cat Adams. Spencer continues to work closely with the BAU after it nearly dismantled, with signature members scattering to the winds, leaving behind only a few, including himself, to keep working on their caseload. After a long, intense case, Spencer returns home to a little more than a can of worms. (A gift for an anonymous prompter)
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Angst/UST/RST
Chasing your Silhouette (COMPLETE):  They’d learned each other’s quirks and intricacies on the job—but when did it become over the line? When did physicality become a detriment to them once they’ve taken off their shields? When did they realize the line in the sand no longer existed? (This is meant to take place a couple weeks after “Zebras” – had to assume a timeline, I don’t remember actual dates)
Paternity Redux - Time Just Stopped (COMPLETE):  Her strength has always been immeasurable—but sometimes, something has to give and a string breaks. Nothing will ever be the same.“I’m trying my best, that is enough.” - UnknownThis is part of a challenge, to right a series of wrongs in an episode that has perpetrated many a discussion of “What Could Have Been”. WriterKC, Liv.Einziger, JustAnotherBookWorm78, MrsWellRested, EORocks, AlexisDawn, ChriskaPeach, and I have stepped up to the plate to do just that.
Oblivion (ONGOING 9/? Chapters posted ***UPDATED***):   The undercover operation in Oregon takes an unexpected, unpleasant turn for Olivia Benson as an injury turns her life, and career, upside-down leaving her with pieces of her memory scattered in the wind.
Humor
Unlock the Door (TENTATIVELY COMPLETE 2/2):   Olivia returns home from a celebratory series of shots with Kim Greylek and lets Elliot Stabler hear a little more than she ever intended to in the aftermath.
Series
Polaroids and Promises (COMPLETE):   The Special Victims Unit has undergone an enormous amount of changes in the past six months, to the point that they are drastically undermanned—until a transfer from the 13th precinct brings new life, and a little chaos, to the team. Will her addition prove to be a permanent shift or a flash in the pan?
Discarded Dignity (COMPLETE):   Elora continues to gain much-needed confidence as a member of the Special Victims Unit but an arrival booked for trespassing, assaulting an officer, and disorderly throws her progress into chaos as her past jumps to the surface. Will she be able to look beyond the misstep to solve one of the most convoluted cases she’s faced? 
Contract Corruption (ONGOING 10/?):   Dickie Stabler and Justin Andrisani are in over their heads--and the members of SVU and the Organized Crime task force must come together in order to set things right.
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit/Organized Crime Crossover
Series
Words of love, words of lies, words of loss
Age of Regret (COMPLETE):  Elliot Stabler has never been good with words but ten years and a double on the rocks in a lonely room will make a man pour his heart out…in any way that he can.
Infidelis (COMPLETE): Elliot had been haunted by too many ghosts; expectations, fantasies, and a promise that he knew should never be kept. It was time to lay them all to rest. “I do not regret you…I regret what you did to me.” - Unknown
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mmvalentine · 4 years ago
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The Birchin | Feysand x Bat Boys
So, I have to imagine this scene has been written a thousand times to Sunday but firstly, I haven't actually read one and secondly, I JUST HAVE TO. Scene lift from ACOFS. The dirtiest, filthiest thing I have ever written and arguably too long for a oneshot sorry. Smut warning, OBVIOUSLY.
Azriel won.
His one-hundred-ninety-ninth victory, apparently. The three of the had entered the cabin an hour later, dripping snow, skin splotched with red, grinning from ear to ear. Mor and I, snuggled together beneath a blanket on the couch, only rolled our eyes at them. Rhys just dropped a kiss atop my head, declared the three of them were going to take a steam in the cedar-lined shed attached to the house, and then they were gone.
I blinked at Mor as they vanished, letting the image settle.
"Another tradition," she told me. "An Illyrian custom, actually- the heated sheds. The birchin. A bunch of naked warriors, sitting together in the steam, sweating."
I snorted. "So the three of them are just in there. Naked. Sweating."
Mother above.
Interested in taking a look? The dark purr echoed into my mind. Lech. Go back to your sweating. There's room for one more in here. I thought mates were territorial.
I could feel him smile as if he were grinning against my neck. I'm aways interested to learn what sparks your interest, Feyre darling.
I paused.
How... interested?
Dark amusement rolled down the bond. Why don't you come in here and find out?
I felt my neck grow heated at the invitation. Was he serious? And for that matter, was I?
At that moment, Rhys trailed a single talon down my shields. I didn't know what he was up to, but I let him in. And saw what he was seeing.
The room was thick with steam, and for a moment, white clouds were all that was in front of Rhys. Then the vapour dissipated, and I became aware of Cassian and Azriel's voices in the room. They were both sitting in opposite corners of the room, elbows propped up on the backs of the bench. Their dark hair was pushed back off their faces, although a lock fell into Azriel's eyes. The black of the Illyrian tattoos stood out even in the steam. And both of them were completely, gloriously naked.
My eyes travelled very, very slowly back and forth between the two of them. Gleaming hair. Powerful shoulders. Broad, patterned chests. Abs you could count. Lower.
Rhys snapped his shield neatly back down, and it felt like a window closing on my fingers. I snarled down the bond, and Rhys just laughed.
Want more? He purred. You'll have to come look yourself.
I was back in my own head now, but the images still danced before my eyes. Rhys' invitation glittered darkly before me, and I turned it over in my mind. Would he really be okay with that? Would I be okay with it? Were the Cassian and Azriel actually interested?
Cassian and Azriel. Rhys' best friends, and males I now considered kin. I wondered how something like sex might change our dynamic, and if finding out would be worth it.
Then I remembered that Mor had tangled with them and remained close as ever. Maybe five hundred years was a very long time, and new experiences were not so daunting to them.
At that moment, Mor yawned hugely and stood to her feet.
"I think I'm tapped, kiddo," she said. "I'm winnowing home." "You're not staying here?" "Sleep in my own bed is rare," Mor said, "and I take it when I can get it." She kissed me on the cheek and picked up her coat. "Are we still on for lunch tomorrow?" "Definitely," I said, and with a wink, she was gone. Leaving me alone with my thoughts.
I looked toward the birchin, and my heart drummed fast in my chest. Before I had fully made up my mind, my feet were taking me toward the door.
I stood in the snow, the wind icy but my cheeks burning. I couldn't bring myself to knock, not just yet. But I couldn't quite walk away, either. So I reached out with my mind.
Rhys? The endless amusement, again. Yes, my love? I'm here.
For a second, there was silence, and Rhys must have felt my apprehension because when he spoke in my mind he was gentle.
You know I'd never want you to do anything you're not comfortable with. That wasn't the part I was worried about. Do... do the other two know you invited me in?
Rhys paused again, and I could hear the feline grin in his silent voice.
They do. And, I asked. Do they... want me here?
The grin stretched.
They do, he said again. I have no idea how to convey to you how fucking stunning you are. You walk in here, and they will kiss the ground beneath your feet. Amongst other things.
The idea sent shivers down my spine. I put my hand to the wooden door, and stepped inside.
The first male I found was Rhys. Strong as our bond was, I often found myself turning toward him like a compass. So I wasn't surprised when my eyes sought a face and found his. He had an animal grin, and his eyes burned.
"Hello, Feyre darling," he said aloud. Down the bond, he said, You naughty, wicked thing. I can't wait to see you play.
Rhys reached for my hand, and tugged me to stand between his legs. The heavy air settled itself on my skin. My heart jumped at the sight of him, slick with sweat and bare before me. He was already hard, and my core pounded in response. I wondered in that moment if the mating bond, the wanting him, would ever lessen.
"It's very, very warm in here," Rhys said. "You won't be needing this anymore." He took hold of the hem of my sweater, and slowly pulled it over my head, keeping eye contact the whole time. Making sure I was okay with this.
"Or these," he added, and slid his fingers into my waistband. I hadn't looked Cassian or Azriel in the face yet, but I could feel their gaze as Rhys slid my leggings off me. I put my hands on his shoulders to steady myself as I stepped out of them, and as he straightened back up his fingers trailed up the inside of my leg. I shivered, despite the heat.
"In fact," Rhys went on, "warriors in the birchin get undressed completely, as a rule." My underthings were pulled off too.
Now, I was fully naked in front of him. Rhys' eyes roved over my body, and his hands followed. I still hadn't turned to the other two. And then Rhys put his hands on my hips, and very slowly, rotated me around. I leaned back into him slightly for reassurance, and he squeezed warmly.
"Feyre," he said, his lips at my hip. "Azriel won the snowball fight today. I would like you to be his prize. Would you do that for me?"
And then I looked at him. Azriel was still in the relaxed position I had seen him in through Rhys' eyes- leaning back, arms on the back of the bench, wrists limp. But his eyes were hard and glazed with lust, and now that I was here in person, there was no hiding the solid length of him.
I could feel myself staring, but I couldn't drag my eyes away. Not when Azriel brought his bottom lip between his teeth, without moving a single other muscle, and I could see him staring right back at me.
"Would you give him his prize, Feyre?" Rhys asked again. He kissed the back of my hip.
I was too nervous to say anything, so I just walked. One foot in front of the other, and as I got closer I found that I wasn't so nervous, after all. Because now I could fully see the hunger on Azriel's face. Rhys hadn't been lying. Azriel wanted this, too. I stopped in front of him, and made sure to keep my eyes on his.
"Congratulations, Azriel," I said shyly. "Give him a kiss, Feyre darling," Rhys drawled. "Azriel is the best snowball fighter in all of Prythian."
I stepped over Azriel's knee and settled myself carefully in his lap, facing him, relishing the feeling of his breathing speeding up beneath me.
"Feyre," Azriel said softly. His eyes searched mine. "Can I touch you?" "Yes," I breathed, and waited.
Azriel's hands came up cautiously, and glided over my hips. A groan so low I almost missed it issued from his throat. He met my eyes again, and I gazed steadily back at him. Azriel's hands moved now, up my sides and down my back. They were so hot on my skin, that I relaxed into him. When they slid back down, I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his.
In all the time I had known the Shadowsinger, I had never seen him ruffled. That was kind of his thing. Every movement Azriel made was controlled, calculated, intentional, and it made him the perfect spymaster. Not this time.
As soon as my lips touched his, Azriel inhaled sharply through his nose, and his arms came up around me. He was so beautiful, I had always wanted to touch him. But I hadn't expected the sudden tenderness, the emotion that seemed to pour forth from him as he crushed me to him, and the fluid motion that replaced his utter stillness of just moments ago. Then his tongue touched mine and this different, unfamiliar taste was intoxicating. I suddenly wanted more, so much more, and my shyness was completely forgotten.
A nudge between my legs alerted me to his growing hardness, and knowing he wanted me was fuel to my fire. With both of us naked, there was no going slow, no stopping his cock from sliding under me. He was slick from the steam, and his sweat, and what I was now realising was my own increasing wetness. I was losing myself in it, when Rhys cleared his throat.
I turned at the sound, and looked at him from Azriel's lap. I pictured myself through his eyes- lips reddened and eyes hooded. From kissing someone else. Rhys' violet eyes danced dangerously, and for a second I thought he was going to call me back to him. But instead, he said, "Azriel, share please." Then beckoned Cassian over without moving his eyes from mine.
I had honestly forgotten about Cassian, sitting in the opposite corner. But now I turned to watch him as he stood, taller and broader than his brothers, and walked toward us.
Sometimes I got too comfortable with Cassian, and it made me think he was another regular male. Sometimes he didn't seem so big. But now he towered over us both, and when he kneeled behind me he was still a head taller than me. He spoke in my ear, his voice like bottled thunder.
"Where do you want my hands, High Lady?" He hadn't touched me yet, but I felt it right down my spine. "Everywhere," I breathed. Cassian obliged.
First, his enormous hands closed over my shoulders. He squeezed, massaging me so I became liquid beneath his touch. His fingers probed the back of my neck, and my eyes slid closed in pleasure. So like Cassian to bring me this gentle strength.
Then the hands coasted down my shoulder blades, around to curve over my stomach, and up. To cup my breasts. I thought that anyone touching me like this who wasn't Rhys would be abhorrent, but I found that I trusted Cassian absolutely. The feeling still thrilled in my chest, but it didn't scare me like I thought it might.Then my nipples were sliding between his fingers and I heard my own moan before I knew I was making it. Sweat beaded down my back, and Cassian ducked his head and licked it off my skin, up my spine. My second moan was louder.
This seemed to awaken Azriel, who leaned forward to kiss my jaw, at the same time as Cassian put his teeth on the join between my shoulder and neck. Both of them grasped and massaged with their hands, and the pleasure was everywhere. My mind started to slide in and out of clarity, accidentally relaxing my shields enough for Rhys to slip in an image of us from where he sat. The two males all over me. And Rhys watching with his cock in his hand.
Does this turn you on? I asked him hazily. His answer rumbled down the bond. Does the sight of you naked, in heat, and being worshipped, arouse me? Oh yes. Yes I'd say it does.
I turned my head to see him with my own eyes, and the sight of him stroking himself as he watched me brought my blood to the boil. My skin grew extra sensitive, and being touched all over by the other two males was suddenly almost overwhelming. My head dropped back, and then there was Cassian, his hand on the back of my neck and turning my head so he could catch my lips with his.
Cassian did not kiss like Azriel. Not soulful and sensual like the Shadowsinger, but rough and unrestrained. His mouth was on mine only a moment before teeth and tongue were clashing with my own, and at the same time his fingers fisted to scrape against my scalp and pull at my hair. One of my hands floated to touch Cassian's face, but the other clenched on Azriel's shoulder. Somewhere far away, Azriel was scratching his nails up and down my thighs, as he watched me kiss Cassian while still seated directly over his own cock.
"Feyre," Rhys' voice carried from the opposite side of the room. "I want to see you while they work you. Turn around for me."
Cassian leaned back to let me up, and I stood and turned to face Rhys. He had slipped further down the wall, more slumped than he had been, and his eyes stayed on mine as he continued to move his hand over himself.
"That's right," he said. "Show me how much you're loving this."
Azriel's hands came up from behind me and pulled me back into his lap, now facing forward. Cassian, still on his knees, put his mouth on my nipple, and his hands gripped just above my knees as he sucked and flicked his tongue. I gasped and grabbed onto Azriel's thighs as my a shudder wracked through my body- but I kept my eyes locked on Rhys, and the hand that was now speeding up between his legs.
Now Azriel was moving. His lips meandered from my shoulder across and up my throat, and his hands... his hands were sneaking across my waist with gently, stroking fingers. Under my breasts, still beneath Cassian's busy mouth. Down my sides. Over my belly. Lower. He squeezed my hips once before his fingertips drifted between my thighs. The light pressure on my clit had my head dropping back and my knees falling open.
Look at me. The demand flashed through my mind. I pulled my head up, so heavy now that Azriel's fingers were moving. That's it, Rhys said, gentle again. Just keep those gorgeous eyes on me.
So I stared into the bottomless violet, even as my focus faded in and out with the steady, rocking rhythm Azriel was making. The same rhythm Rhys kept with his own hand. The realisation brought a gush of wetness between my legs, and Azriel moaned softly behind me as his fingers slid through it.
Cassian stood then, and his hips were level with my face. He brought his cock into his hand, and now the tip was at my lips. For a moment I just stared. Cassian was thicker than Azriel, in every part of his body, it seemed. There was something intimidating about it but also... very sexy as well. I opened my mouth, and Cassian placed the head of himself on my tongue.
Cassian's groan was deep and rolling, as he slid up and down. I closed my mouth over him and sucked as he pulled out, and then moved forward to take him as deep in as I could. Cassian's eyes closed as his hand slid around the back of my neck, and as I started to speed my pace, Azriel matched it with the movements of his hand on my clit. My moan was muffled in my full mouth.
Then Rhys coughed, and we all paused. Azriel was the first to move, standing up so I was pushed off his lap, and then turning me to the side before dropping to the floor behind me. Cassian took a step to the side too, and now Rhys' view of me was unobstructed once more. I resumed my work on Cassian, concentrating on breathing through my nose and flicking my tongue over his head.
It meant I was distracted, and taken by surprise when Azriel put his hands on my ass and licked right up the core of me from behind.
I pitched forward, grabbing onto Cassian's hips for stability, and choking slightly as his cock was pushed further back into my throat. I had to take him out of my mouth, and just brace against him for a moment as Azriel continued to slide his tongue into me, and stars burst before my eyes. Then Cassian was tapping his cock against my lips and I opened for him. I eased myself back and forth, pumping Cassian in my mouth but also rocking against Azriel's tongue. Cassian's head lolled back, and his fingers slid back into my hair. I opened my eyes, and looked sideways at Rhys.
It was too much. Azriel's mouth building me up. Cassian filling me with the thickness of him. Rhys staring right at me as his hand moved steadily up and down his beautiful hardness. The four of us, moving together, slicked with heat and sweat and sex.
My knees started to shake as I stood there, bent over, and my release started to trickle down my spine. My mouth salivated over Cassian's cock and made a dripping mess of it. But despite having much, much more than I had ever had at one time, I knew I couldn't come like this. Not without him.
Rhys, I begged silently. Rhys, please.
In what seemed like a single, fluid motion, Rhys had stood and crossed the floor toward us. Cassian and Azriel withdrew as soon as he approached, automatically deferring to their High Lord.
Rhys sat down on the floor, his back against the low wall. He pulled me into his lap, and for a minute I was relieved to be back in his arms, all of home to me. I took a deep breath, recovering slightly from the overwhelm of having the two other males all over me.
And then Rhys lifted my hips and sat me down on his hard cock.
Wet as I was from Azriel's tongue and the heat of the steam room, I came all the way down around him, and a loud, wanton sound escaped from my lips. Rhys waited for me to adjust, then started moving beneath me, and suddenly I was right on track for that orgasm. My eyes shuttered and my jaw dropped open as he thrust in and out of me. Then Cassian lay down on his stomach and sucked my clit into his mouth, and at the same time Azriel lowered his cock to my lips, not as thick but possibly longer than Cassian had been. I tried to move my head for him, but I was fast losing control of my muscles.
Rhys smoothed my hair back as he fucked up into me, and my head fell back against his chest. Since I couldn't move, Azriel started pumping himself in my mouth. Rhys' hands squeezed over my breasts, and Cassian's tongue flicked over my clit the way I had done over his head before. I was dimly aware that he had started jacking his own cock in his hand.
How does it feel, Feyre? Rhys asked silently. I could barely comprehend him. How does it feel to be fucked three times over like this? To have all these males, wanting you so badly? I tried to reply, but I couldn't even form words in my mind. All I could do was whimper down the bond, and Rhys fucked me harder. I was strung out like a taught bow, and started to seriously doubt I could survive this.
Behind me, I felt Rhys' attention shift.
"Azriel," he said, "you can come now." He slowed his hips and ground into me in circles, instead. It had me wound even tighter. "Come on her chest, Shadowsinger."
I was so caught up in my own pleasure that I was only now recognising the taste of precum on my tongue, and just as I did, Azriel pulled out, grabbed himself with his right hand and shot hot, white cream right over my breasts. It dribbled down over Rhys' fingers.
"For winning the snowball fight," Rhys said. "Congratulations."
Azriel slumped onto the bench, and watched the remaining three of us.
"And you, Feyre?" Rhys said. "Would you like to come, too?" "Yes," I babbled. "Gods yes." "Well," Rhys said to Cassian. "You heard her."
And then Rhys was kneeling up, keeping himself inside me, and pulling me up with him. Cassian had to shift upward too, and kept his tongue moving in this new position.
Now, upright but on our knees, Rhys could get an angle that meant he was that much deeper inside me. He pulled almost all the way out, then plunged in to the hilt, over and over while Cassian kept up the pace over my clit and the stubble of his chin added extra sensation as his jaw moved.
"Go on Feyre," Rhys said, breathless now. "Come for me. Come right between me and Cassian." No sooner were the words said than my climax ripped through me, the two males holding me up because there was no way I could hold myself. I shuddered hard against them, the intensity that had been threatening to ruin me this whole time finally breaking like so many ocean waves. Through the aftershocks, I watched as Cassian came jerkily in his hand without a sound.
As my body finally stopped shaking, Cassian rolled over and closed his eyes. His head rested against Azriel's foot, and although I was sure no one could fall asleep that fast, that's exactly what it looked like.
"My turn," Rhys breathed.
He let me down so I was on all fours, gripped my hips in his hands, and started pounding into me with no mercy. I thought I was spent, but my body reacted the way it always did to Rhys. I didn't see my second climax coming, but as Rhys knocked that spot inside me over and over, the orgasm hit me like a sledge hammer.
I came so hard I barely noticed Rhys coming, slamming into me from behind and breaking apart inside of me until it was running down the backs of my legs.
We dropped to the floor together, Rhys pulling me into his arms and my head onto his chest. With a glance, his magic cleaned us up and then we just lay there, breathing in the steam. My leg was draped over Cassian's, and he was indeed now asleep and snoring. Azriel was dozing off, too.
"I don't think you're supposed to fall asleep in a steam room," I said to no one in particular. I turned to look at Rhys. "Should we try to get everyone back into the cottage?"
"In a second," Rhys replied, his lips on my temple.
So I closed my eyes too, snuggled into his chest, and let the heat settle over all of us like a blanket.
****
TAGLIST: @ghostlyrose2 @highladysith @stardelia @feysand-babies @tillyrubes10 @ratabrasileira @live-the-fangirl-life @maybekindasortaace @annejulianneh111
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kiki-shortsnout · 3 years ago
Note
For intimacy prompts: #36 being pushed against a wall for Frostironstrange! 💚❤️💙
I might have cheated a little and made it a door....
***
Jealousy wasn’t an emotion Stephen had much experience with. He’d been top of his field when he’d been a doctor, a pioneer, a trailblazer, he was the one people regarded with envy. Even in his romantic life, jealousy wasn’t an emotion he’d fallen victim to, never having formed a lasting attachment to another person.
He knew the root of the emotion stemmed from a feeling of insecurity, that the best thing he could do was turn his gaze inward and think about his own personal growth, to address his feelings of low self-esteem.
This…didn’t feel like feelings of low self-esteem. It felt like a coiled ball of barbed wire and razor blades sitting in his stomach, strangling the life out of him every time he saw them together.
The words on the page wavered as his eyes went unfocused, his ears straining to hear sounds of them whispering, torturing himself further by hearing fragments of their conversation, his mind filling in the blanks.
Why couldn’t it have been me?
Stephen had fallen in love with Tony first. He’d agonized over that, spent countless nights thinking about the reason why, if the rationale behind his jealousy was born from some adolescent feeling such as, I saw him first so therefore he’s mine, but that wasn’t it.
A bond had formed between them when fighting Thanos, a trust that Stephen seldom found in others. He knew Tony, probably better than anyone else in the world after his little exploration of millions of possible outcomes, but that wasn’t what made him fall in love.
It was the man’s determination, his courage, his sarcasm, all wrapped up in an appealing aesthetic package that was Tony Stark. He had been willing to sacrifice himself for the world, just as Stephen had sacrificed countless lives in the Dark Dimension, and at that moment against Thanos, Stephen knew he’d found someone in this huge, boundless universe who could understand him.
He looked up at that moment, staring at Tony across the gloomy Sanctum library. His legs were folded beneath him on the armchair, his elbow on the desk as he rested his head on it, idly swiping through his Starkpad as he worked.
Stephen hadn’t been able to let him die, had used every possible resource he possessed and those around him to save his life. He hadn’t even known Tony that long, but he had still sobbed alongside Rhodey and Pepper as Tony finally inhaled a lungful of battle charred air after excruciating seconds of being dead.
Sensing Stephen’s stare, Tony glanced up, giving him a gorgeous smile, the type that sent euphoric sensations squirming through his stomach. Ignoring Tony’s mouthed question asking him if he was okay, Stephen turned back to his book.
He’d never understood what it meant to love someone until the moment he’d lost Tony. Despite already witnessing millions of potential lifetimes, ignoring millions more, Stephen still wanted to remain by Tony’s side, as a friend, a lover, whatever capacity he was allowed as long as he could be part of the man’s life.
‘What’s got your attention, Anthony? I’m over here.’
Then Loki had happened.
The trickster had faked his death at Thanos’s hand. Not for his own personal gain this time, it was the only way he could save Thor and Bruce, ensure that Thanos would leave whatever Asgardians he hadn’t slaughtered alone. Stephen had doubted Loki’s intentions were as honorable as that, believe a large part of his actions were to save his own hide, but he wasn’t made of stone, despite how he was perceived, and Thor begging him to help find his brother hadn’t fallen on deaf ears.
It was Tony asking him to help bring Loki home, to give him the second chance they’d all had at some point in their lives, that swayed Stephen into action. The man didn’t even know about his repressed feelings, and even then, he was powerless to Tony’s wishes.
‘Lokes, I can barely concentrate as it is when you’re near me,’ Tony flirted.
He ripped the corner of the page from the tightness of his grip.
Stephen couldn’t actually put a finger on the exact moment where his feelings for the God of Mischief had changed from irritation to begrudging respect.
And then into complex complicated feelings of their own.
But he’d known when Loki’s and Tony’s relationship had changed, had seen the way both of them looked at the other, the swollen lips after they returned from meetings.
‘Stephen? Everything alright?’ Tony asked, destroying the painful recollections, making him look up at them both. They were trying to hide their relationship from him, and he wasn’t sure why.
I’m not important enough to know.
‘Yup,’ Stephen snapped, slamming his book shut and throwing it onto the desk between them.
‘Usually, you only look like that after I have spoken to you,’ Loki teased, placing both hands flat on the desk and leaning forward, goading him. That was their relationship, provoking each other, encouraging character growth through spite and teasing.
Today it felt like salt was scouring the wounds on Stephen’s soul.
He needed to control these feelings, these emotions. He’d already convinced himself that he was content with being Tony’s friend, that whatever stirrings of interest he had towards Loki had to be his libido talking. Tony Stark deserved whatever happiness he could find, and Stephen was the biggest advocate for it.
‘No, you’re not, honey.’
Stephen flinched in his chair as he looked up, Tony directly in front of him, his hand reaching out. The way his eyes had become soft and tender with worry for him made Stephen want to weep, to launch himself forward into his arms and speak his deepest desires.
They already have each other. There isn’t room for you.
He batted Tony’s hand away, ignoring the way the man flinched even as a wash of shamed nausea crept over him.
What are you expecting, Strange? That they’ll include you? That Tony will leave Loki for you? Normal people don’t have two partners.
‘Hey, it’s okay…I didn’t mean to scare you, we can leave if you’ve got things on your mind,’ Tony reassured, taking a step back.
‘Nothing’s on my mind,’ Stephen answered straight away, his voice coming out too loud and panicked. He saw Loki’s eyebrow raise in question, the Asgardian looking between them both, analyzing.
Shit.
‘Stephen, something’s obviously wrong, and I don’t think it’s because you don’t understand…’ Tony paused, tilting his head so he could try and read the title of Stephen’s book. ‘Yeah…I don’t know what you’re reading. Look, if it’s something I did don’t be shy,’ Tony told him with a playful grin, but Stephen knew what was behind it, the insecurity he hid behind those smiles.
‘No! It’s nothing you’ve done,’ Stephen lurched forward to grasp Tony’s elbows before remembering who else was with them. Immediately he let go, shoving his chair back with the force he used to escape. Cursing his treacherous body, his gaze went to Loki who was watching the whole thing unfold with shrewd eyes.
‘Come on, asshole, what is it? I’m not a mind reader you know.’
‘No, but I am. I have a glorious feeling this is going to be fascinating,’ Loki’s silky voice wrapped around them both, his fingers lit up with his magic.
He can’t find out.
‘Leave me alone…’ he spat, his hands readying themselves to create a portal as he leapt to his feet. ‘You can’t be serious?’
‘Deadly,’ Loki growled, extending his fingers with a snap, his emerald magic twisting forward and nullifying the portal Stephen had been trying to create.
I need to get out of here.
‘What? What’s going on? Loki, stop it don’t-’ Tony yelped as Stephen launched himself into a run, barreling him over in his haste to escape. Loki gave chase, both of them scrabbling against the wooden floor as they sprinted to the door.
Tony can’t know. Neither of them can know.
Stephen ignored Tony’s frantic shouts for them to stop, the burn in his lungs as he ran, the pain in his shoulders as he collided with the bookcases. Books rained down on him, the library around him fading to one, singular point.
Get to the door!
He could hear Loki hot on his heels, felt the tendrils of his magic trying to ensnare him, his snarls of frustration as Stephen ducked and weaved around the bookcases, no finesse to his movements, just a dogged determination to escape the situation.
Crying out in relief when he made it to the door first, he skidded to a halt when the Cloak billowed up, blocking the way, trapping Stephen inside.
‘They can’t find out! Move!’ Stephen hissed at the Cloak.
The Cloak shook its collar, spreading itself out so it appeared huge.
‘Please!’ Stephen pleaded, his voice cracking. ‘I’ll lose them both otherwise!’
‘What the hell is going on? Are we under attack?’ Feet pounded on the floor behind him, the sounds of his suit forming was audible even over Stephen’s pounding heart.
Think. Think!
Reaching forward to rip aside the Cloak, Stephen found himself slammed against the back of the door, a lithe muscled body pressed against him, and a hot mouth sealed over his. Despite wanting to moan into it, the electric current of unbridled lust surging inside of him, he didn’t stop fighting to escape.
He didn’t want to hurt Tony with his lustful feelings and burgeoning affection for his lover, didn’t want to damage their friendship. Then there was Loki, whose tales of cruelty had reached them all. Who knew what he would do to Stephen for coveting his lover? He would desecrate the feelings he held dear, spinning this into a story that they shared with other while in bed, their mocking laughter surrounding them.
‘Desist your struggles, Strange,’ Loki whispered when he stopped, leaving another scorching kiss on his lips as he held him still. ‘Your feelings are making you foolish. You know I cannot read minds, yet you crumbled under your fear and left your true self bare.’
Stephen strained against the hold, his head banging back against the heavy door, nails gripping the wood. Loki didn’t budge, his strength far exceeding Stephen’s, but he moved his hands to his forearms, allowing the blood to flow back into his damaged hands with a pained hiss.
‘Sorry,’ Loki murmured. ‘It is not my intent to-’
‘You already knew I had feelings for him,’ Stephen hissed, looking over Loki’s shoulder, trying to understand what the expression on Tony’s face was, memorizing the detail of him before he’d be no longer allowed to look.
I never wanted this to happen.
‘Yes, but I did not know of your attraction to me. Which makes this conversation so much simpler,’ Loki answered.
‘What conversation?’
‘You are not alone in your feelings, darling,’ Loki called over his shoulder, his sharp green gaze never leaving Stephen’s.
He slumped in Loki’s hold, hanging his head as shame burned his cheeks.
‘You’re not listening to my words, Stephen.’ Loki brought his head down to whisper in his ear, adjusting his grip so Stephen could rest against him, holding him instead of restraining him. Even with all of the panic making him light-headed, his chest flayed open for all to see, Stephen still took the time to breathe in Loki’s scent, the unique alienness of it.
‘Stephen? Is Loki right? Do you…have feelings for me?’ Tony asked, his voice wavering in bewilderment.
Rubbing his head against Loki’s shoulder for a moment, Stephen took a huge, quivering breath before he drew back, trying to find his courage.
‘No, Loki’s voice rumbled through his chest, oscillating through to Stephen’s skin. ‘It isn’t just lust you have for me. You hold feelings for us both.’
‘Stephen?’
‘Yes. God, I’m sorry, I fell for you, months ago, Tony,’ Stephen sighed, not looking at him, staring at the glossy black hair brushing against Loki’s collarbone. ‘I knew you were together, thought I could be happy…No, I wanted to be happy for you-’
Stephen stumbled as Loki vanished from before him, flailing until he was caught by Tony’s smaller frame. He only had a second to figure out what had happened before he was being kissed again, a sharp whipcrack of shock drowning out any thoughts.
He retained enough sense to break apart, his gaze seeking out Loki, fearful of retribution. Loki’s façade cracked at his stare, relaxing into an expression he’d often seen him look at Tony with.
‘You were blinded by what you did not have, saw only what you wanted to see. You never realized that Anthony was watching you too, snatching gazes of you when you were preoccupied with your melancholy.’
Stephen looked down at Tony in his arms, his brown eyes blazing in that look of determination he’d fallen for.
‘Stephen, I…you too? I never thought…you never gave any indication of-’
Stephen silenced the words with a kiss, reaching up to cup Tony’s face with his hand, expressing everything he could through his actions, his longing, his repressed desire, his love. Their tears mingled together, seeping down to their lips, binding their kiss with suffering sweetness.
‘Idiots, the both of you,’ Loki said, wrapping his arms around them. ‘I know this type of relationship might not be considered… acceptable on Midgard, but I believe now that I know of your feelings, it would be wise to explore the possibilities.’
‘This, this isn’t normal though,’ Stephen mumbled against Tony’s lips, lifting his free hand so he could grip hold of Loki.
‘Who cares about normal? I’m Tony Stark, I do what I want,’ Tony asserted, kissing him soundly on the lips, before turning and kissing Loki’s jaw.
‘Ineloquent as always, but I believe this time the sentiment comes across nicely,’ Loki said, eyes closing as he accepted Tony’s bestowed kiss.
‘You both? How long?’
‘Since Thanos-’
‘Since you found me-’
They answered together. It was Loki who blushed though, uncertain how his own declaration would be taken.
‘I’ve known Tony longer, understood and accepted my feelings for him before I found you, but that doesn’t mean what I’m feeling towards you isn’t real, Loki,’ Stephen assured, his confidence growing, the earlier panic and fear dispelled by their touch.
Loki swallowed and nodded once, his grip tightening before he took a step back, gesturing at the Cloak to move aside.
‘I realize we’ve forced this confession from you, and if you would rather take some time to-’
‘Do you want to go on a date?’ Tony interrupted.
‘A date?’ Loki deadpanned.
‘A date? Like drinks? Food? Music? Somewhere we can get to…well not know each other better, but talk. About what this means for us?’ Tony encouraged, his gaze darting between them both.
‘Anthony. I do not think-’
‘A date sounds great,’ Stephen interrupted him this time, pressing his lips together to hide his amusement at Loki’s confusion, reaching down to take both their hands in his.
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theredsuzuran · 4 years ago
Text
Douma x reader - Innocence
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Took me a long time to upload a new content am so sorry for the delay I was really busy with school assignments therefore I cannot manage the time to write. I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors on my behalf, I hope you enjoy.
Warning : Dark themes like gore, blood and violence, degradation and swearing, mature content.
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The moon shone brightly above the sky as it's light leak through the branches illuminating the famous building of the eternal paradise cult. A new set of followers rushed into the dwelling in hopes of fulfilling their selfish desires, diminishing their agonies and enriching their possessions. However a particular human with her tattered kimono seem not to be interested to convey anything although the people around her would die to witness even a glimpse of the charismatic leader as for now she was busy running along the wide long corridors
The sound of thumping footsteps echoed throughout the building as a herd of followers attempted on catching the miscreant who disrupted the peaceful atmosphere prevailing over the supreme cult. The already annoyed and frustrated people were all worked up to catch the energetic human who on the other hand have thoughts of escaping this place they called paradise. If only she was careful enough to notice her mother's strange behavior soon as they entered the place but how can you possibly blame an innocent little girl like her, or so she thought. Afraid she might lose sight of her treacherous mother who abandoned her just moments ago she desparety stumbled her way out although that didn't concerned her simple thinking process but that's exactly how complicated the situation was.
Turning one last time to look behind if those weird people were still following her or not when suddenly she bumped into a Tall muscular figure standing infront of her soft delicate frame she must have missed him approaching while focusing on looking behind. "Please just leave me alone!" The girl fumed coherently still overwhelmed by the amount of people rushing towards her like waves something that she was not accustomed with as for eighteen years she lived indoors interacting rarely with anyone and playing with dolls most of the time.
"Watch your tongue brat" one of the men standing beside the tall man spoke with disgust hinted in his voice. "Crouch down you insolent woman, where's your gratitude it's because of lord Douma's benevolence that you are still here or you'd be rotting in the street thanks to your mother", the people around her started whispering and murmuring behind her back but she was not bother since her senses were filled with newfound wrath how dare they insult your angel like mother? No longer able to contain your anger you shouted with tears "Then take me to my mother, I don't want to stay here alone".
"Your mother abandoned you here so shut up and deal with it, now move your way for master" the man grunted irritatedly motioning the other followers to grab her and take her away.
"No don't touch me" she wiggled under their grip rushing towards douma blocking him from entering the room by grabbing his arm tightly "I am not going anywhere until I know where my mother is" she cried loudly making the demon flinch with surprise, how pitiful the creature looked in his polychromatic eyes. He have seen many humans crying before him for obvious reasons which honestly have become his monotonous routine but somehow this girl acted quite weird being her age, interesting him enough to investigate. As he was about to speak the man beside him pushed the girl hashly making her lose her balance and fall on the wooden floor.
"How dare you touch master with your filthy hands bitch" he lift his hand to slap her tight in the face but someone grabbed his wrist just in time to save the girl from further humiliation.
"Silence" all the questioning glances, judging looks and whispering stopped at once as douma spoke nonchalantly making the latter shiver in regret.
"I am sorry douma sama" the man uttered in pure horror having no intentions to displease his beloved lord. "I was-"
"I don't want to see that happen again, understood?" He replied coldly still maintaining his wide smile as the previous chaos shifted into complete hush. The man lowered his head down with shame nodding silently. Douma averted his attention and glanced at the figure underneath making the girl jolt a bit but his once frightening demeanor changed into a cheerful and optimistic one in matter of second upon seeing her.
"Please take her to my chamber and treat her wounds" the man clapped with a wide grin plastered on his face. A group of female servants came rushing to help picking her up. The girl being too bewildered did not protested and simply follow his tone as if she was hypnotized by his neatly decorated persona.
The girl was immediately taken away without delay and as per douma he needed to attend his cult duties. First of all she was washed and changed into a beautiful kimono as soon as she stepped inside, then she was escorted into a room filled with antiques and lavish items which she have never seen. Her face lit up with fascination as she began venturing those decorative pieces.
"Looks like you have ease down a bit, good good" A familiar tone struck in her ears startling her a bit only to turn back and view the handsome cult leader although it was a bit strange because she did not heard anyone approaching.
"Aww did I scared you?" He laughed covering his face with golden fans.
"No I was just- you came in without a warning, I was taken aback" she explained blushing trying her best not to act immature to which douma laughed uncontrollably as he found this human's expression adorable say entertaining in his words.
"D-dont laugh at me" she pouted crossing her arms in the attempt.
"I am sorry (y/n), you really amuse me" he replied still grinning. However there was a moment of awkward silence between them as he uttered her name abruptly.
"I didn't tell you my name.." after a long pause she replied to him with a confuse look in her face.
"I know everyone's name who are living under my supervision including yours besides what kind of cult leader I am if I don't have basic information about my fellow followers. Oh look I have been talking to you without giving the chance to let you talk my bad" he laughed again waving his fans creating another awkward situation. Causing you to sweatdrop on his remark.
"Say (y/n) how old are you?" to which she replied enthusiastically "I am 8 years old and will turn 9 soon"
"Ah you don't look like one" douma grinned closing his eyes in the process.
"Yeah I get that a lot" she remarked shyly.
"Your mother is one of my followers" he continued
"Really?" her eyes sparked with hope as she approached douma with anticipation grabbing his arms for the second time starling him, she really like holding hands eh? he have experiences like that but somehow this girl made him feel different so he allowed her but then she stopped halfway through her words "I really miss her it's been a week since she left me here" her voice dropped with sadness.
Douma felt no sympathy for humans or anything as such, he have learned to fake his emotions from a very tender age eversince he was born to the extent that even seeing his mother killing her husband mercilessly failed to evoke feelings within. He clearly did not understand what she was feeling he just stared at her with a blank expression only to replace it quickly with a grim look even faking few tears. "(Y/n) chan you know its okay you will still have me" he patted the girl in an attempt to comfort her.
"Friends?" (Y/n) replied between her tears.
"If that's how you want us to be" douma smiled at her gently shocking himself for a second because he didn't think of smiling?
Things escalated soon after that incident, (y/n) was a kind and compassionate person from inside and out and in not time the cult followers started loving her presence. As often douma would let her accompany him and most of the time she stayed by his side following him everywhere and he didn't mind that at all moreover he appreciated her company. (Y/n) was like a fresh bud to him who depicted innocence and purity he loved spoiling her with expensive gifts yet she never showed signs of greediness and genuinely appreciated his thoughtfulness slowly forgetting the past life she was in and cherishing her friendship with douma. At first she was reluctant and didn't like getting so much attention but in the course of time she bonded better with everyone and was quite content with the life she was leading. As for douma he began to depend on (y/n) to the point that not seeing her face for even one day would make him go insane and he didn't understand why not like he want to because all he cared about was how she made him feel so many varieties of pleasant emotions he wish he could feel. Eating her was out of context.
However all good things must come to an end for he is someone to not rest in peace after the sin he have committed for centuries. Seeing douma paying her more attention, spoiling her with a ravish lifestyle and even letting her stay by his side all the time made some of his cult members terribly envious they wanted to punish her for taking their chances of stealing the spotlight. There was this one room that he forbade his followers to enter for obvious reasons and specifically for (y/n) because he didn't want to repeat the same mistake. This was exactly what they wanted (y/n) to do break the rules and Douma's trust. Like that there would be no more favouritism on her with others.
"Ah (y/n), there you are" one of the female member approached her one fine morning.
"Yes how may I help you?" She asked cheerfully
"Lord douma have asked for your presence in the forbidden room tonight and he said its urgent"
"Aren't we all prohibited to go inside"
"Oh (y/n) it's true master have arrived today and he wants your presence"
Upon hearing that news her heart elated with happiness, it has been two weeks since he last saw douma around and she missed him but something felt off about the whole situation douma always sees (y/n) first before tending his followers then why did he not come meet her did he not miss her like she did?
She was lost in her thoughts until she found two hands waving and snapping infort of her face.
"Don't be late, okay?" With that said the female hurried back into other room leaving (y/n) behind even though the situation seem kinda odd maybe douma was busy afterall.
At night (y/n) went into the restricted area. She stood infront of the shoji door in absolute dilemma debating whether or not to enter the room or go back. There was her desire of meeting douma on one hand and not breaking his trust by entering the room on the other. In the end she decided not to but as she was turning back she heard someone grunting in pain behind the closed doors being a compassionate person, she decided to open the door and enter into the darkness adjusting her eyes in the process, a pungent smell hit her nostrils making her cover her mouth and to her absolute terror the scene infront of her made her puke in disgust.
A pile of Mutilated bodies, mostly women laid around lifelessly on the blood stained tatami mattress. Many having no limbs, some headless and organs missing from their body as if someone had ate all of that. The whole room was a mess full of unfortunate people. She felt sick and began crawling down her way back from the corpses. However she felt a tight grip on her left foot upon looking down she witness the sight of a woman her intestines oozing out of her stomach begging for help. (Y/n) stood there perplexed unable to say anything chocking through tears.
"I told you not to come here, why?" (Y/n) turned her head violently to see douma standing in a distance his countenance cold and sinister evident that he was highly displeased upon seeing his innocent flower disobeying his instructions.
"It's not... like... what you see" (y/n) cried fearfully but douma didn't seem to buy it well in a blink of an eye she found herself in Douma's arms as he aggressively dragged her out of the room.
"What's going on douma" no word came out from the usual lively douma.
"It's hurting me your grip" no reply again to which she forcefully tried to stand still with all her strength. This time douma stopped his features hidden under his bangs making her unable to figure the expression he was carrying.
"Is this why douma forbade us to enter the room" no reply
"Are you responsible for murdering those innocent people?" No reply
"DOUMA" she shouted
"Why you want to join them?" Douma finally looked at her his eyes glowing dangerously proving his existence to be something unnatural. (Y/n's) eyes widen at his remarks as tears rolled down her visage.
"I hate you.." she murmured
"What?" He tilted his head letting his guard down a bit at her hurtful comments.
"I HATE YOU" she pushed douma roughly and flew from the place running deep into the forest for she knew who he was and what he is capable of doing. Tearing down she constantly reminisce the moments she shared but she cannot allow herself to sympathize his heinous crimes. Why is it that the people I love are always taken away from me? She thought. Exhausted from running she halted in order to catch her breath while glancing back to see if he was following, there was no one indeed so a sudden feeling of relief gushed in her body. However turning her head back she saw him standing inches apart from her face which made her shiver and fall onto the knees.
"Why are you running away from me (y/n)" he said apatheticly his head lowered at her level. She did not reply and stayed quite.
"Is it true that you don't love me after all the things I did for you?" Covering his face with one hand his eyes glowing under the moonlight a look of dejection written on his face. There was complete silence in the forest except the sound of rustling trees.
"Answer me" holding her face now firmly he growled making her flinch under his breath. In one last desperate attempt (y/n) tried to stab douma with a tree branch she found laying on the ground but unfortunately douma was faster and easily dodged the attack and in a swift motion he hit her with immense strength causing her fragile little body to tremble in pain as she coughed mucus mixed with blood.
"How foolish of you" he crouched down her height staring intensely at the quivering figure of the miserable girl. As for (y/n) her body ached but more was the tightness in the chest that she was experiencing in the moment.
He pulled her by the hair roughly making her scream in pain although at this point all she could manage with her cracking voice were inaudible screams.
"Why did you disobey me? (Y/n)..." who knew beneath that friendly kind face was hiding a undeniably deadly and calculative demon and at this point it was clear for her that he was anything but human.
"Who are you?" these few words manage to escape from her shaky lips in between low grunts.
"I am the leader of the eternal paradise cult"
"Wrong" to which he tightened his grip making her shriek again.
"You humans are so dumb believing in the existence of primordial deities where in reality its just a myth, a fairytale, created for pleasuring the sufferings of mere human. Being superior than you mortals I wanted to make these pitiful existence happy and that's why I was born and what you saw there" his lips curved into a cheeky smile revealing his deadly fangs creeping the shit out of the already scared girl. "I eat them so that they can always be with me and attain salvation" a sinister laughter escape from his mouth as he covered it with his golden fans. (Y/n) unable to process the new sets of information knots formed in her stomach making her sick in the guts.
"I ate your mother too, oh she was ungrateful after all the things I did to her just like you" protruding her eyes with pure shock she felt her veins popping out and blood boiling in pure rage.
"You are a monster, you think your stupid morals would persuade people to think like you do, I despise you douma I thought we were friends and you took away the one I cherished the most?"
"You think your mother loved you?" Douma snapped. The duality of this was man was insane, all the things he does or says are plastic.
"She never cared for your life, you want to know why? I will tell you since you insist" douma dragged her out of forest holding a fistful of her hair tightly inflicting great discomfort to the girl while he continued with his harsh statements and deliberate insults.
"You were just a burden, behaving like a fucking child with the alluring body of yours"
"No my mother promised me..she would protect me.. you are lying"
"While you were crying everyday inside my shrine that lowly woman enjoyed her life indulging in adultery with various cult members leaving her sick husband and mentally retarded daughter in the dark" every word he uttered spread vemon into her ears.
"Still she wanted more and more and more, what a greedy whore" douma continued.
"Do you know how much difficult it was for me to control myself around you? While you sway your hips and act innocently making those hungry men lust over you, how much dumb can you be?"
"What do you mean I don't understand.. douma"
"I did everything I can for you yet you remain ungrateful, disrespectful? Well guess its runs in your blood and I thought you are innocent but it turns out that you are just like the rest of them, naive"
Her eyes widened with every hurtful remarks he made about her and she did not understand why she felt that way shouldn't she be resentful towards him for killing her beloved mother but here she is weeping constantly because douma was treating her like he never did before.
"But that's fine (y/n) I can not bring myself to hurt you I love you and we shall always be together whether you like it or not" nothing reached in her ears anymore as her body grew numb. Her eyes shut as she carried the unbearable pain in her heart slowly loosing consciousness and remaining sanity.
It would have been easier if she died but alas a mere human like her is doomed at his mercy.
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fenristheorem · 4 years ago
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hi, if your ok with it, can we ask hc for the boys (nevra leiftan and lance ) dating a virgin s/o?
Ah, my first request with more than one LI! Happy to write for the three 😊 Also, this is my first time writing Nevra - and I’m not too familiar with his character, especially with what little we know about him in ANE - so I apologize if he’s a bit out of character.
This ask does sort of request an nsfw-ish scenario - considering the main focus is Guardienne being a virgin - which I’m fine writing for Lance but not as much for anyone else. However, in a wide perspective, being a virgin can effect a few other aspects of their relationship rather than just during the moment - and I can sort of imagine very basic nsfw ideas for the other two - so I do feel I can write this well. This ask is a good example of something that walks along the lines of some of my rules, but can bend them a bit since it's nothing too specific.
That being said; these will be general headcanons mixed with the slightest bit of vague nsfw.
~Under the cut~
Nevra with a virgin S/O:
Nevra is a bit... odd about it, I suppose. There’s certainly nothing wrong with Guardienne being a virgin - he’s been the first time for many women in the past - but recently he’s been... spending time with women who have done this before and know their night will be one and done, or perhaps repeated a few more times in the future without any attachment. Of course, he stops seeing these women once in a relationship with Guardienne, but when they encounter the time where this information is brought up, he doesn’t really know how to react.
She’s a virgin - ok, that’s no problem. He knows how to treat a woman during their first time; gentle, attentive, supportive. However, it clashes a bit with his routine as of late, and since he’s still dealing with a lot of emotions from the past, he does question sometimes if this bothers him in some way.
To clarify: I imagine Nevra is fine and accepting with this, and has no problem with acting appropriately during their first time, but he would be a bit... nervous? about how their first time would go. He would wonder if she’ll be anxious and need support, or if it would be so natural that the idea of nervousness or support wouldn’t even cross their minds as something that would need to be prominent during this time.
Basically, he’s been spending his nights with experienced women, so being in a relationship again - with the woman who saved Eldarya and emerged from the crystal no less - and then realizing that she’s a virgin, so he needs (by his own moral opinion and by social expectation) to be attentive during their first time, is out of his current field of expertise. So yes, he’s probably a bit nervous and clueless in some ways.
His emotional standpoint has changed since the White Sacrifice, he’s a bit more aggressive and standoff-ish, so he wonders sometimes if he’ll know how to treat her properly. He wants to be kind, gentle, careful, and tender, but he’s been through so much - between realizing an old friend has betrayed them, living through the war, realizing her and the demon sacrificed themselves, Valk’s death, Ezarel, Cameria and Miiko’s leaving, and so much more - that he’s not exactly sure if he knows how to be all that anymore.
At first it almost sounds like her being a virgin would bother him in the way that would make him turn his interest away from her, but really it’s not that at all. Nevra will put so much pressure on himself to assure that - of everything that has happened in the past years - this will be right and good, and that pressure will display in way that can make her wonder if her being a virgin is a major issue for him.
In a relationship with her, he’d probably have a few issues with softening himself every now and again, especially in the beginning. Sometimes he may forget that he doesn’t need to be (and shouldn’t be if she’s his partner) cold and aggressive with her, and in time he’ll soften up properly, but once he learns that she’s a virgin there’ll be a bit of a relapse in his personality again. He’ll want to make sure everything will be alright - that their first time won’t be screwed up because he doesn’t have much recent experience in taking someone’s virginity - and since that idea will take up most of his thoughts he may forget that he’s being a bit cold towards her again. Basically he’ll slip back into being a bit distant because his thoughts will be preoccupied with trying to think over how things will go.
He’ll be so busy trying to think things over - how he should react, how he should treat her, what happens if she’s truly uncomfortable and not ready, if his reaction will be appropriate in her eyes -  to assure everything will be good that he’ll be at risk of accidentally sabotaging something that he would otherwise be just fine at.
Overall, he’ll withdraw a bit again, becoming a bit cold, distant and aggressive at some moments without realizing it. His partner will likely - justifiably - think that this change is because he’s losing interest due to this new piece of knowledge, but one simple, honest conversation can fix this.
He’s not disinterested because of this, he doesn’t mean to act cold and distant towards her again, he doesn’t wish to drive her away - he wants everything to be alright, he wants something to go right after so many things that went wrong, but fears that it won’t go right for some reason. This continued impression can be harmful for both, so as long as they both have an honest, open conversation about this they can both relax and go into this in an understanding, tender way, where nothing goes wrong and everything is just as they hoped for.
Leiftan with a virgin S/O:
Leiftan really doesn’t want to hurt anyone, especially Guardienne. He’s had his time where he was a terror - except to the angel, for the most part - so when his partner first tells him this information he’s very glad that she not only told him in the first place, but that she also trusts him to understand this and act accordingly. He loves his partner like no tomorrow and is determined to make sure that she knows it, so he readily listens to any concerns she may have and openly talks about this if that’s what she needs to feel comfortable.
In a way, he’ll sort of know prior that she never had sex before - they’re something along the lines of soulmates, so if anything he’ll just have that odd bit of knowing without actually knowing.
Regardless, he’s ready to approach this topic at any time, in any way she wants. He knows how to be gentle, there’s no way he’s not going to be attentive throughout the process of taking her virginity, and he’s willing to do basically anything she needs of him at any time.
He will talk to his partner about this beforehand as well, making sure to stress to her that her comfort matters to him, and that he’ll do anything she needs him to do, even if it means backing off and waiting to try again another day. If she isn’t comfortable, then he isn’t either.
Overall, this facet of information doesn’t effect many things in their life - they still act the same, do the same things, feel the same way for each other. The only difference is that Leiftan will be sure to be that much more comforting and attentive in he moment if that’s what she needs. Leiftan loves his partner dearly and will be just fine with this information, but he doesn’t feel he needs to stress too much that he’ll do anything for her. They have a special bond - she already knows he’ll do anything for her.
Lance with a virgin S/O:
Like Nevra, Lance has likely had quite a bit of experience with sex in the past - including being the first time for some women if that’s what they chose - but none of that is recent.
When he learns of this information, he doesn’t care much. He’s completely fine with her being a virgin - everyone once was before their first time - so he keeps a level head about it and is sure to listen to anything she feels she needs to say.
Lance’s only concern will be if he feels that he can control any impulses during the moment. He’s a relatively feral man - mostly due to his draconic instincts, but also since he feels emotions very deeply - so he believes that, in theory, it would be relatively easy for him to be a bit more aggressive than he should be.
This is why, of all the guys written here, Lance is most likely to talk about this subject with his partner with his own concerns regarding himself. He knows there’s a possibility that he may not be her ideal in the moment, but he doesn’t overthink and have an existential crisis about it that could cause more harm than good (*looking at you, Nevra*). Lance will be sure his partner knows that it’s possible for him to get caught up in the moment and forget to be gentle, so he’ll tell her that if she’s at all feeling uncomfortable, hesitant, in need of comfort / reassurance / affection, anything at all, just tell him. He’s not going to be disappointed, he’s not going to be angry or upset, this won’t turn his interest away from her - he will listen and be as patient as she needs him to be. He knows it’s possible for her to decide in the moment that she’s not ready, he understands that and doesn’t hold it against her, and even if he’s aching to have her, this is something that he will not debate - if she wants him to stop, be more affectionate, be a bit more cautious about the manner in which he touches her, etc. he will do as she wishes. He just wants her to be comfortable and know that he cares.
However, if she tells him that she’s a virgin before they’re anywhere close to having sex, Lance will take it upon himself to change his daily manner with her a bit. He’ll be more attentive to anything she needs, he’ll be a bit gentler with his touches, he’ll be a bit more transparent with his emotions and affections for her. It’s not that he’s trying to entice her into sleeping with him sooner, he just feels that he should be more obvious to the fact that he’s willing to treat her differently if she needs it, and in this case he feels that he’s showing he’s happy to treat her in a more tender manner.
Of course, his partner may notice his slight change of manner and think that his opinion of her has changed a bit, and she may confront him about this. She may think that he feels he needs to treat her softer or be more attentive - like she’s suddenly a glass doll that he could break if not careful, and she’ll be quick to point out that she is - in fact - none of that. He’ll immediately realize and understand her reasoning for this, and he’ll be quick to tell her that he doesn’t think that at all; sex can be emotional and messy, and while she may think she won’t need any reassurance, that may change in the moment. Everyone is different during their first time, some people do end up needing reassurance and some don’t - he just wants her to know that if, per chance, she does end up needing him to do anything different, he can provide that and he’ll be happy to provide it. If he’s in a relationship with her then she truly means a lot to him - I can’t imagine Lance in a mere casual relationship at this point - so he’s going to make sure that he acts appropriately in every way, and if he’s not acting appropriate to her standards then she needs to tell him so he knows. He’s not someone to break his back to please someone, but his partner will hold a special place in his heart that he won’t want to lose, and he realizes that no relationship is perfect so it will take listening and compromise to work, so he’d likely be just fine with making any changes to help her feel more comfortable.
On another note - there’s a bit of a... carnal change that takes place within him. Knowing that he’ll be the one to take her virginity will spark a bit of a territorial streak within him. She’ll be his, only his, no one else will have ever touched her in the ways he has. This won’t make him obsessive and controlling with who’s near her, who she talks to or anything, but there’ll be a special loyalty that he has for her thereafter (however, I can image he’s a bit territorial with her regarding certain people depending on if they seem romantically interested in her and his past relations with them). He won’t really treat her differently, if anything he’ll just be a bit more obvious with being protective about her, but he’ll definitely feel the change within him when he suddenly has overwhelming urges to be around her and have her in his arms. After all, being a dragon means that he’ll be quite possessive at times - especially knowing that he’ll forever hold a special place in his precious gem’s heart from this.
These are somewhat short since there’s three of them together, but I hope you like them despite the length! I suppose this post is a good comparison on how I write the three different men, since I had a bit of a hard time writing for Nevra and Leiftan (especially Leiftan - I feel he’s very straightforward with this) whereas I could easily add another couple bulletpoints for Lance (but I didn’t want to make one headcanon incredibly long while the others were short). This, again, was my first time writing for Nevra, and I’ve only written Leiftan a few times prior as well, so they may be a bit out of character but I think I have them well written.
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papers4me · 3 years ago
Text
Fruits Basket, Se03, ep10 (part 1)
“ What to do? & how to do it? the answer & the method are so simple, so simple but difficult as hell. it was hard for me to get them, & that’s exactly why I treasure them/ makes them valuable”. kyo~ This is my favorite quote in all anime.
How many times a domestic abuse victim was told just leave this abusive partner? report them? easy. just make a call. Report your abusive parents? tell someone. easy. Just speak up. It is true. It is easy but difficult as hell. To believe it is your right to fight. No, to believe you deserve to fight. to Live. This abuse is not a punishment you must endure. Hope is not dead. How simple yet so difficult to do that. ugh! my heart!
- Seeing Death vs Facing Death: ( The abuser who was stopped):
Abuse is a form of slow death. An actual intentional murder of an innocent soul. Abusers suck the life out of their victims & kyo’s biological dad is the poster monster for that. His appearance:
thin deathly demeanor, lack of nourishment, excessive drinking, lack of desire get out of the abyss, wide eyes, tiny pupils, manic laughter. shaky body movement. pathetic outlook at things.
heavy breathing, lack of logic & distorted facts, blurry speech, bizarre mentality, toxic behavior, tendency to hurt, injure, both physically & verbally.
inability to grasp reality, desire for inflecting pain on others, finding joy in that as it justifies his entire toxic mentality.
Fear of being hurt like he hurt others & being paranoid since he KNOWS he should receive punishment.
Kyo stood watching this man spit, rage, shake, scream. The man from his past, the authoritative figure in his early tender years, the person who must always be right: a parent. Facing his dad, Kyo’s entire gradual change was fantastic:
Kyo went from feeling utter fear from this man, hatred towards him, grief at the loss of a father & a mother, to force himself to stand his ground & not leave” easy but difficult as hell“ , to talk ” easy but difficult as hell“ , to announce that isnt gonna die ” easy but difficult as hell“ to say I’m loved & I want to to be with someone ” easy but difficult as hell”
to then realize the source of his mom’s misery isnt him after all, but this jerk! & not crumble at this realization ” easy but difficult as hell“ to grief over his mom’s tragic life & still announce again that he’s anit throwing his life away ” easy but difficult as hell“ to still look at his dad with pity rather than immense hate & anger ” easy but difficult as hell“ to remove his hand & leave him behind in the past while he moves forward ” easy but difficult as hell“ to say “ i’ll come visit again, cuz I anit afraid of you anymore, I’m not running, but I’ll try to extend a hand if you wanna do the same one day. It is your choice to be the abuser who must be stopped or the one who is atoned! you can choose, dad! We heard his choice as kyo was leaving, didn’t we? locking himself in an eternal cage that he made for himself. After all, he is the monster in his own story by his own choice.
-Seeing death (1): Kyo watching his mom’s suicide is a traumatic experience especially considering she chose such a graphic way to exist this world. Kyo once said to tohru “ mom went flying”, he now said“ mom threw her life away” very graphic ways to explain her death both literally & figuratively. This alone coupled with his father accusing him, resulted in a 4 year old screaming” I’mma yuki & kill myself, this would make you happy, dad”. This explains kyo’s 2 meetings with yuki as kids“ I hate you” at the sohma estate, the 2nd meeting “ I hate you” at the street. Mimicking the toxic behavior of the dad. Why didn’t kyo mimic kazuma? cuz trauma doesn't work like that. Kids can live safely for time then one traumatic experience shatter their self-worth into an endless cycle of self-hurt, low self worth & anger issues or withdrawal. The writing that set kyo/yuki against each other is perfect.
-Seeing death (2): Kyo watching kyoko’s death hammers all the insecurities of child kyo deep down into teenage kyo. Kyoko too, went flying, blood everywhere. too much pain happening again, crashing hope & killing his fighting spirit over & over. Be with tohru? why? to kill her, too?
-Seeing death (3): Kyo watching tohru’s injured body. Yup. You caused this. not by pushing her or failing to catch her. No. but by hurting her with harsh words. by forcing her away from you.
-Facing death (1): Kyo facing his dad, the symbol of deadly-abuse. To stand & announce to live is huge. -Facing death (2): refuse death: being caged till death, -Facing death (3): To say, I wanna be loved & love someone, life is not just being outside, heck! kyo was outside for 17 years! life is abt being with those who give it meaning! -Facing death (4): To not demand others to die as a punishment. Walking away from his dad without igniting the cycle of revenge & hate. ahhhhhhhhhh~~~  Chef’s kiss!
-Seeing eye to eye: ( I don’t need to be you, but I appreciate you):
Kyo & yuki toxic relationship has been ongoing since their birth. The moment kyo’s dad was dismayed that he got the cat of all zodiac & the moment yuki’s mom was delighted she got the rat of all zodiacs. From that moment it became: look how lucky the rat parents? You shamed me? Look how pitiful that cat? eww! stay away from his filth. The explosive nature of kyo’s tragic fate tainted him with the blood of his mom & the daggers of his father’s hateful words, while the nature of yuki’s sheltered & locked fate tainted him with fear & isolation. They meet & both carry out the feelings of rejection & hate all while envying the other. The toxic nature of their relationship consist of fights & condensing words. Tohru connected both. Through her, they became civil. Even talking abt perverted shigure. Now that she is hurt, they are lost without her. Their lives are empty.
Yuki’s “ kyo has his own pain & reasons”  (to not see tohru) is my fave line! even better than all the epic lines after they confess their feelings. cuz this like happened before they connect. it shows that, I see his pain, I get he has his reasons. But whatever issues he have shouldn’t hurt tohru. this is when yuki interferes in kyo’s choices. For tohru. This is also when kyo really allows him to. For tohru. Had tohru nor be part of the fight, kyo wouldn’t even engage in it & yuki wouldn’t initiate it.
-“I wanted to be you!” : Kyo said it first. I loved this so much! Cuz kyo said I hate you first! it is so fulfilling that the truth is now out. From kyo first. Cuz really... that hate was all toxic inheritance from a toxic father & a toxic system.
- “Why do you have to say it firs!” Yuki was mad, cuz he was struggling with it for the longest time. to be kyo. He even mused on how kyo interacted with ppl in school, got himself his own mini kyo. lol. studied how kyo filled tohru’s world just by existing. yuki can't do that for tohru. he looked for someone whom he could do that for! yuki/machi scene at her house paralleled kyo/tohru scene at her room when she was sick (se01, e023) & when they eating the somen together (se02, e02), yuki/machi chalk scene paralleled kyo/tohru scene at the beach where he coaxed tohru to tell her mom’s story (se02, e07). Yuki really was having a hard time finding his true self & accepting it without needing to learn from kyo. It is hard to say “ i admired you” after being rejected by you! so kyo saying it first helped yuki say his after. Also, both boys were hella shocked they admire each other. Like both were deeply shocked! stupid boys! XD
Side Notes:
Kyo’s confrontation with his dad is furuba’s most powerful scene & most well-written one! From the fear of facing him, to talking to him with low voice, to physically stopping him, to the exposed last piece of locked memory abt the mother, to the freedom gained by walking forward! Heck, even how it was weaved psychologically to perfectly mimic children’s self-defense mechanisms & children copying their parents theme. The realistic depiction of abusers both in their most powerfully menacing moment & in their weakest cowardly moment. Top-tier writing! Hands down my fave furuba scene! Can’t ask for better! Can’t even imagine better! genius- writing Takaya-san!
The boys had a necessary fight & confrontation & the yuki’s entire speech was valid & perfect speech. However, as usual, I’m not a fan of how violence is depicted in furuba. I was actually “warned/ ordered” by an anon to not “ sh*t” on the boys fight scene. I don’t know why someone who’d read my reviews would think i’d have anything but love for both boys. I criticize the writing not the characters. Also, furuba fans have always been good to me, I state my opinion frankly & they talk to me! “ talk!”. You don’t have to throw virtual fists over different perspectives on fiction. Talking kindly does magic, also having different opinions is natural & normal for humans.
I love yuki so much, he’s one of my top faves in furuba & I get why the boys would quarrel & throw fists. I get the history between them, the current state of mind, their emotions & mentality & I get it’s fiction & drama that needs its “ OMG” moment. However, I cringe when I see violence used as a bonding moment in fiction in general. That’s just me. I wish the fight was done in a more artistic style without showing that scene where yuki corned kyo & punched him in full view of the screen. (again not hating on yuki nor the fact that they needed to fight). I’m jus saying I didn't need to see a one-sided beat up from a character I love to another one I love. That’s just me again~ feel free to enjoy this moment to its fullest. It’s fiction & I’m not judging anyone at all, nor hating anyone from real life or fiction <3<3<3.
Yuki’s last piece of character development is in my part 2 review! Along with machi. Also, yuki’s Japanese VA was awesome!!
Also, let yuki have deep various facial expressions!!!! ugh! In the fight scene they did yuki so dirty with his hair covering his eyes all the time! then followed by low quality shots of him breathing! Why?! The voice acting sold the entire excellent emotional rage more than the animation! Yuki can look pretty even when mad, heck! screw looking pretty! just give him deep facial expressions to mach his feelings! boy was hella mad like he never was his entire life! always forced to wear a mask or be diplomatic! now he’s screaming his lungs out, you hide his face??? really?? Sigh~ the anime always do this wit yuki, replace facial expressions with hair on eyes or having his eyes without light. I wanna see them expressive eyebrows so bad!!!
Another powerful VA performance was both kyo’s dad VAs! both the Japanese (with his excessive breathing) & the English VA (with his range). They sold the mad abusive character! they gave me chills!
Also, I sound like a broken record, but kyo’s both VAs did phenomenon in the dad’s scene & tohru’s scene. Honestly, I only watch the dub to hear Jerry! I learned his name & would watch the dub for him!
Akito, Arisa, Kureno in part 2 of my review as well.
Shigure/yuki returning home scene is call back to ep1. Ok, everybody loves a call back scene & the full circle thingy. but C’mon! you dont have to copy everything! the walk, the scenery, its purpose, dialogue & all! The anime really took advantage of kyo being missing. XD
Tohru’s dress/top color matches the color of kyo’s old hat (The hat). symbolic of him finding her? As if he did find her when they were children? cool. I love this detail. But i do NOT love this color on tohru at all !! lol. it is so dull on her. The dress style/ design mimics her same dress in se01, ep26 as she was talking to kazuma & kyo fought him. Their first intimate moment after nearly loosing the other. Heck! tohru was even hurt on her hand as well. but the color was a nice pastel yellow. It suited tohru. The hat’s bluish-greenish color matches tohru’s own pajama at home!!!! & kureno’s hospital pajama! T_T... why couldn't the hat be red!!!! a color that both represent kyo & yuki! both were compared to red before~ oh well~~ minor issue~
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yeojaa · 4 years ago
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ANGELS & AIRWAVES (w. jjk)
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He's never met you but you know how he sounds when he wakes up from a nap and his greatest fears.  You know the way he sings after a shower and that he could be mistaken for a dying seal when he's laughing too hard.  The best part?  You don't judge him for any of it - including the fact he's a filthy Widow main.  He might just love you.
alt summary.  Jeon Jungkook has a big fat crush on a girl he's never met.
pairing.  jeon jungkook
genre + rating.  fluffy crack.  general, for now.
warning / tags.  long-distance relationship, crushes, canon compliant (ish),  eventual happy ending, gaming, gamer!jungkook, strangers to lovers, friends to lovers, overwatch.  tags are hard.  :( 
reading.   n/a.  a three part one-shot.
word count.  ~2750
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part ii.
JUNGKOOK’S ROOM Sunday, 15 March, 2020.  2:01 AM.   
He falls for you in between the tireless teasing, the laughter that sinks into his ears and replays like a highlight reel.  It happens when he leasts expects it, when he's got his face pressed into the velvet of Yeontan's fur and you're cooing over voice chat, whispering sweet nothings to the manic panic pup.  It comes in the moments he's not expecting it to, when he's frustrated and unbearable and you're as sunny as always, spilling yellow paint across the doors he tries to keep shut.  
Bit by bit, day by day, he finds himself thinking of you more. 
First, it's wondering what you're doing while he's half-asleep and on his way to the studio.  Do you look as tired as you sound?  What colour is your hair and how does it stick up when you've just rolled out of bed?  When you yawn, do you stretch like a cat?  He thinks you do, if the sounds you make are any indication.
Then it's asking himself whether you might like the same things he does, from horror movies to carnival rides.  Would you hold his hand as you made the drop, stomachs leaping into your throats?  Would you scream?  Would it sound anything like that terrified pterodactyl noise you make when you're spawn camped by a Roadhog?  He doesn't consider the fact that he doesn't even know if you're in the same city and you'll likely never meet - bound to the servers of Overwatch only.  
He thinks about all the things he'd like to do with you.  Video game nights filled with butter-tipped fingers and spilled popcorn.  Walks with your family dog - Natto - you'd told him about, all fluffy white fur and dark teddy bear eyes.  Sunrises on the rooftop of his building, because you had the worst insomnia he'd ever seen and what better way to spend your endless waking hours than with him.  
Jeon Jungkook knows he'll probably never get any of these things, but he lets himself daydream anyway. 
Like now, for instance, as the two of you sit in another queue at 2 AM.  You just woke up and you've got that tell-tale rattle in your lungs, words sluggish and lacking any real intent.  He imagines you look the way you sound - tired and a little out of it, with barely opened eyes and sleep-loosened limbs.  
"How'd you sleep?"  He asks softly, crossing his legs beneath him and raising his arms high above his head in the same instance.  The bones of his body realign, ridges of his spine clicking into place when he knots his fingers together and pulls taut.  
"You know - the usual,"  you muse, apathetic.  It's always the same.  
He doesn't question it any further.  He had once or twice, when you'd first started talking and he'd noticed the way you were always up at inhuman times.  One grumbling response had told him enough - your schedule was what it was and no amount of remedying could fix it.  
There's a beat of silence before he hears rustling and then the loud, inescapable sound of an electric toothbrush.  You don't bother to mute your microphone, not that he minds.  He simply sits quietly, scrolling through his phone as you go about your "morning" routine.  
"How was your day?"  You're settled back at your computer, he thinks.  The acoustics sound far less like that of a bathroom.  
"I had the day off, actually."  He'd used it to edit some footage and record a cover.  He hasn't posted it to Twitter yet - there were certain times he was supposed to, to maximize visibility - but he's excited for when he does.  It's a song that's been stuck in his head for weeks, all thanks to you.
"Woah - you didn't work today?"  There's genuine surprise in your question, rounded syllables that pop off your tongue in an explosion of shock.
“Right?”  He laughs a little, short and sweet.
Despite his carefully crafted facade, there were certain plot points that just stuck, intrinsically weaved into his day-to-day whether he liked it or not.
His jam packed schedule, for instance. 
To you, it’s the result of stretching himself too thin between teaching at his friend’s dance studio (where he also apparently moonlights as a personal trainer) and working as a videographer for his media-involved friends.  Not that you know any of them.  No, no.  All the work he does is for the little guys - none of those big companies like BigHit or JYP.  Jungkook’s just your average Joe behind the camera.
“What did you do all day then?”  You’re still in awe, little flecks of wonder threaded throughout like glittering gold yarn.  
“Hung out.  Did some editing.  I’m kind of behind.”  That was an understatement.  He’s working on footage from six months ago, trying to get it out before they head on tour and he won’t have the kind of time he has now.  
“Probably spending too much time gaming.”  
“Yeah, probably.”  Not that he minds, or that he’d change it.  He savours the time you spend together, even if it has kind of messed up his sleep schedule.  
“Sorry not sorry,”  you quip, seemingly reading his mind.  
“You should be,”  he retorts with laughter that builds in his stomach and echoes out of his chest.  “I don’t think I’ve had a good night's sleep in weeks.”
If you hadn’t had this conversation a handful of times before, he thinks you might be offended.  Instead, he can practically hear you roll your eyes - imagines your optic nerve nearly severs with the intensity of it - and grins.
“Don’t kid yourself - you know I’m the best thing about your nights!”
You’re not wrong.  “You’ve been lied to.”
“I’m suing!”
“I’ll have my lawyer contact your lawyer.”
“Wait, what?” 
The two of you have done what you always do - talked yourself into a tizzy that has you both laughing, sound crackling across the airwaves.  It’s nonsensical and silly but it feels good.  Your bond shines with it, glitters prettily between you.
Thank god for Overwatch.
You return the conversation to a semblance of normalcy first.  “Did you listen to that song I sent?”
“Yeah.”  The briefest pause.  “It was terrible.  Hated it.”
“Oh, shut up!” 
“I’m kidding.  It was really good.”  Jungkook doesn’t tell you that he’s had it on repeat for the past few days, saved to the private playlist that’s filled with the rest of your song recommendations.  
“I know!”  You’re preening as if he’d just complimented you, clearly pleased by the praise.  He supposes it’s a pretty good endorsement regardless. 
“Got any more for me?” 
“I should just make you a playlist.”
He ignores the way his heart skips a very real beat, mimics the erratic rhythm of his fingers on his keyboard.  Because he’d absolutely love that.
“You should.”
“Really?”  You sound uncertain but maybe - just maybe - a little hopeful.  He might also just be imagining things, as he so often does with you. 
“Yeah.  Why not?”  It comes nonchalantly despite the rushing in his ears, the wave that threatens to drown him.  He can feel emotion in his chest - winged and distracting.  A kaleidoscope of butterflies fluttering away. 
You’re quiet for another second.  It feels like an eon.  “Okay, yeah.  I’ll start one and we can just add to it together.”
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BIG HIT ENTERTAINMENT’S GYM Thursday, 26 March, 2020.  6:30 PM.   
“You sound like a meathead,”  you say, off-hand and disinterested.  
He loathes the grunt that squeaks past his teeth as he gently returns the dumbbells to the floor. Cue a generous chug of water and a near death experience when the liquid goes down the wrong pipe. 
Loud coughing crackles through his airpods before he’s addressing you.  “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re grunting like a caveman.”
If your first comment hadn’t offended him, this one does.  Jungkook scoffs, tonguing the interior of his cheek as his brow furrows.  Weights are returned to his hands, rotated above each shoulder as he resumes another set of presses. 
“Do you even workout anything other than your fingers?”  He’s making a conscious effort not to make a sound, breath exhaled sharply through his nose.  It’s harder than he cares to admit but he’s also not about to give you an excuse to tease him further.  You already had way too much material.
“Don’t shame me!”  You really don’t sound that indignant.
“So, I’m right?  You’re a big couch potato who’s just jealous of my hot body?”
Now you’re incredulous.  It’s one of his favourite sounds because it comes draped in laughter, dancing around his head in the form of cartoon hearts. 
“Did you just say ‘hot body’, Jay?”
“Maybe I did.  What of it?”  He sniffs - he’s picked it up from you over the months - and your amusement doubles, giggles crashing into each other in their haste.  
“You are so, so weird.”  There’s a tenderness in your voice that he’d like to live in.  It wraps him up like a hug, tugging at his feeble little heartstrings. 
“Weird and hot.”
“You can’t just say that!”
“Why not?”  If anything, you’re the one person he can say it to.  With you, it’s the funniest joke he’s ever made.  It’s playful and silly, with no rhyme or reason.  He doesn’t have to worry about it being misconstrued or held against him. 
“You just can’t!  Only other people can say it.”  You sigh dramatically, from your chest.  “Do I have to teach you everything?”
“Everything but being healthy, probably.” 
“Har har har.”  
He can tell by how the words roll off your tongue, muffled and lacking clarity, that you’re eating.  He wonders if you’ve made pancakes - you’d been complaining about craving them just two days ago.  There are no tell-tale crunching or slurping, so he knows it isn’t your usual double whammy combo of ramyeon and Choco Boys.  
“I’ll have you know I used to run.”  Something about the way you say it makes him believe you, even though he wants to mock you a little more.  
“In gym class doesn’t count.”
“I used to run with Natto, you ass!”  Okay - so that actually sounded legitimate.
“Why don’t you still then?”
“There was an incident once.”  You’re sipping on something - likely coffee with oat milk and two pumps of hazelnut syrup.  It doesn’t matter that it’s dinner time and most people would be winding down for the evening.  “Because of my insomnia, I’d run at odd hours.  One day, some weirdo stopped me while I was running along the river.  He didn’t hurt me or anything—”  A part of him thinks you’re downplaying it but he says nothing, only waiting for you to continue.  “—but he followed me home.  I made the mistake of telling my parents and they freaked out so…” 
“So no more running by yourself.” 
“Yeah, exactly.”
“I’d run with you.”  It doesn’t mean much, but it’s the thought that counts.  
“Thanks, Jay.”  
Not for the first time, he wishes he could hear his name - his real name.  Just once.
“JUNGKOOOOOOOOOOK.”  It eats up every ounce of space of the gym, filling the room with the resounding boom of it.  How it manages to be so loud, he’s not sure.  He wishes it weren’t.  There’s no way you haven’t heard it.  
Especially not when it comes again, deafening even to his occupied ears. 
“JUNGKOOOOK-AH!”  Namjoon now, right as the double doors fly open.
Jimin’s barreling toward the alarmed maknae as he shouts.  “WE’RE DOING A VLIVE!”
Jungkook feels like his insides are melting  - his internal temperature spiking with embarrassment and worry and something that chants oh no! over and over in his head.  The tops of his ears are burning, as is the column of his throat.  A quick glance in the mirror confirms his suspicion that he is, indeed, bright tomato red.
“Jay?”  You repeat once, twice, when he doesn’t immediately answer.  “Everything okay?”
He moves with a speed he doesn’t expect, weights unceremoniously dropped on either side of him before he’s tearing his AirPods out.  “I’ve got to go. Sorry!”
He doesn’t end the Discord call a moment too soon, Jimin upon him in the next instant.  The smaller dancer is draping himself across Jungkook’s shoulders, the widest shit-eating grin on his pretty face.
“Want to join us for a VLive?”  
“No.  I’m busy.”  
“Busy with your girlfriend?”  Jimin’s wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.  He only stops when Jungkook shifts aggressively, tearing himself out from underneath the other.  
“Not my girlfriend!”  
“But you wish she was!”  
He can’t deny that, so he doesn’t bother, instead seizing his discarded weights with an embarrassed scowl permanently etched into the planes of his face.  He’s reracking them - because god, he’s not an animal - when he notices Jimin making his departure, that teasing smile replaced with something soft and edging on concern.
“What’re you going to do when we’re on tour?”
Jungkook blanches then.  You’d become such an undeniable part of his everyday life that he hadn’t even considered what it’d mean when he was busier than now, unable to spend late nights gaming with you. 
But Jimn’s already gone, leaving him and his thoughts alone.
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JUNGKOOK’S ROOM Friday, 27 March, 2020.  12:05 AM. 
It’s close to midnight by the team he logs on.  Realistically, he should go to sleep.  He’s clean and worn out and his bed is calling to him like a siren at sea.  But you’re sitting alone in the channel, streaming Overwatch for no one to see, and he can’t just leave it at that.
He needs to say goodnight, like he always does. 
“Coming for my title as Headshot God?”   The quip’s off his tongue before you have a chance to acknowledge him, your laughter the first thing he hears once he’s connected.
“I’ve been waiting in this queue for seven minutes.  Seven!”  
It’s really not that bad.  The rare times you’d both queue for DPS were nearly double that.  
“Patience is key,”  he teases, slumping into his chair as he watches you click through your Hero Gallery.  You’re cruising seemingly aimlessly, roving through the different skins for your mains (Mercy, Ana, Genji, Ashe).  The silence between you is comfortable, interspersed only by the occasional munching he can only assume comes from the carrots you seem to inhale.
For all the junk you ate, you were somehow also weirdly into vegetables.  
“Patience sucks,”  you retort, matter-of-fact. 
“You know what else sucks?”  
It’s a rhetorical question and he knows you know, but because you’re you, you start listing things off just to get under his skin.  “Spiders?  Undercooked samgyupsal?  Not having coffee?  Your jokes?”
If he weren’t laughing so hard, he might’ve given you shit for making fun of his comedic genius.  He really doesn’t understand how you think he’s the unfunny one when all you do is crack puns.  
“I was actually going to say me,”  he finally manages in between those high pitched cackles of his.  
“Wait, why?”  You’re used to him having witty comebacks.
Edge of enamel worries his bottom lip and Jungkook can taste cherry Chapstick and what would be bashfulness, if it had a flavour.  “For earlier.”
You scoff, your own tinkling laughter tearing him out from inside his own head.
“It’s okay, goofball.”
He appreciates how laidback you are, never holding anything against him.  Not even when he hangs up on you or accidentally spams you with memes when you’re trying (and failing) to sleep.  “No.  I’m sorry.”  He says it earnestly, with all the meaning he can muster.  
MATCH FOUND flickers across his and your screen and you’re loading into hero selection.  He knows you’ll be too distracted once the game starts, so he’s grateful when you laugh again, sweet as summer.  
“Nothing to be sorry about.  Just tell me everything’s okay and we’re even.”  
Inhale, exhale.  Try not to tell her you have the biggest, stupidest crush on her,  he tells himself. 
“Everything’s okay.”  And he means it when he says it, though they aren’t the words he wishes he could say.  
“Good.”  
You’ve chosen Genji,  He smiles to himself when you join voice chat and the rest follow, greetings filtering in from your team members.  
“Good luck.”  You don’t need it.  He still likes to say it.
“You have an early day tomorrow, right?”  Leave it to you to remember his schedule even when he doesn’t.  
“Yeah, pretty early.”  
“Then go to bed!  I’ll still be awake when you’re up.”  
He lingers on that fact - holds it tightly in his hands so it can’t slip away.  You’d be there in the morning, just like you always were.  Knowing that stirs those same butterflies in his chest, words stolen by the overzealous beating of their wings.
You read his silence like they’re your own thoughts,  “I’m always here for you, Jay.”  
“Goodnight.”
"Sleep sweet."
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notes.  this chapter is set four-ish months following the first, in case that’s not clear.  :) 
tag list.  @teawithbucky​ 
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svtreaction · 4 years ago
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have a one night stand
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a/n: wow it has been TOO LONG. I was perusing my request inbox and honestly this one seemed so fun I couldn’t resist. These are just my opinions, so take it easy on me! GIF is from yunchanpai. ALSO I added some spice so 18+ !!!
xx, Lex 
[MASTERLIST] [MTL’S]
most  s.coups vernon mingyu the8 jun hoshi woozi wonwoo jeonghan dk dino seungkwan joshua  least
s.coups // “You’re body is stunning... I won’t miss an inch” - In regards to daddy coups taking the number one spot, I attribute my choice to maturity— he oozes a sensual coolness that gives me the impression that he could definitely handle a one night stand, but this is not saying that there wouldn’t be regret with some cases.  He would treat the people he sleeps with a disgusting amount of romanticism (fuck yes), lots of body worship, which definitely leaves you both wanting more. This being said, I feel that a lot of one night stands with this man could lead to a possible relationship, but on the other hand I think he wouldn’t necessarily bat an eyelash at one night in bed. 
mingyu // “...just like that” - Similarly to coups, I feel like Mingyu just oozes maturity. He definitely doesn’t make one night stands a habit, but I believe he doesn’t have a problem with them.  He also seems like the man that can flip the switch— he’d want to take care of anyone who he’s with in that particular moment, but when they’re gone, I feel like he could detach more easily than the other members. In terms of during the one night stand, I would not be surprised if Mingyu has a thing for bondage. I can just picture him asking his partner if he could use silk ribbons to tie them down... Possible degradation included? 
vernon // “you look beautiful baby” - I can see Hansol being very open to one night stands. If anyone confronted him about it, he’d just shrug his shoulders and carry himself with the “I don’t give a shit” attitude. A couple years ago, however, I would’ve put Hansol significantly lower on the list. Me and an old friend always theorized how we believed he could’ve went through some significant heartbreak or trauma somewhere around the Boom Boom era, and turned into a sex god after. Vernon, to the outside eye, can seem stoic at times, but this boy definitely has a big heart, and I think he just wants to spread love in all the ways he can. Lots of body worship with him! 
minghao // “turn around for me” - Minghao is rather nimble and flexible, and I can see these particular skills as motivation to get into the bedroom. I think he likes the challenge of having sex with another person, and loves to please his partner as much as humanly possible. Similarly to the other “higher ranked” members, Minghao ALSO has a maturity about him, and definitely has the “I don’t give a shit what you think of me” attitude. Additionally, I don’t think Minghao would be embarrassed to ask his one night stands personal sex questions, or have the fear of telling them to try new positions with him. Things in the bedroom with this boy would always be exciting, and you’ll definitely end up sore the next day if you end up spending the night with Minghao. 
junhui // “call me daddy, sweetheart” - as we are all aware of, jun does not shy away from pleasure. This being said, I believe he does not shy away from the one night stand scene; however, as greasy as this boy can be, he is also just as much a big softie with a tender heart. So as much as he’d be interested in delving into some extra pleasure on the side, I also see him wanting to form stronger bonds before the deed is done. After having sex in general, I can see him being a big, big cuddler, but don’t let this fool you, he definitely wants you to call him daddy while he destroys you.
hoshi // “you feel so good pretty girl” - soonyoung definitely is not against the one night stand way of life, but similarly to jun, I can see him wanting to form some bonds beforehand. With most situations, I feel like soonyoung would want a label on the relationship before any sex is to be had, however, I do see him every once in awhile having a one night stand to scratch his itch. With Soonyoung, it’s a toss up— he’s either going to have regrets in the morning, or he's just going to try to forget the person he brought home and did sinful things to just for one night. Big into pet names.
woozi // “...fuck” - jihoon no doubt lacks experience in comparison to the other members of seventeen, but just because he might not have as much experience, I really don’t think he’d be against participating in the one night stand scene. He’s mature and can emotionally handle being with a partner for just one evening; however, I don’t think this would be his first choice. I think Jihoon would prefer to have those emotional connections to his partner before he takes it to the physical level. Very quiet during sex. Heavy breathing/panting from this guy. 
wonwoo// “you feel so good around me” - I know, basically for a fact, that Wonwoo WILL fuck you good. He’s the perfect mix of sweet and dangerous in the bedroom. But when it comes to one night stands, I think our boy would tend to shy away from them. Wonwoo strikes me as a person who can, and desires to, form really deep connections with others, so one night stands are not his forte. But somehow if you do manage to get him in bed with, whether that be a one night stand or after being in a relationship, it’s going to be GOOD. 
jeonghan // “faster, kitten” - Jeonghan would probably stray away from having a one night stand with anyone. I think he believes he’s “above” it for some reason, and only sticks to having sex with somebody he cares for. I don’t think it would take him long to have sex though, I just think he definitely needs some personal connection first. Jeonghan wants to learn your boundaries, he doesn’t want to dive headfirst into the unknown. Definitely leans toward being a sub. Likes when you’re on top. 
dk // “Is this okay? Do you like it?” - SO SHY! He’s a real cutie, and even though he’s rather outgoing and exuberant, I think Seokmin would be nervous to take someone he doesn’t know into bed with him. I also believe he’s a pretty vanilla partner, and definitely liked to stick to missionary so he can see your face. Wouldn’t mind hitting it from behind though. Is a little skittish with every move he makes, and will constantly be checking if you’re okay and if he’s pleasuring you like he should. 
chan // “... I like this” - I think Chan would be very similar to Seokmin in regards to having a one night stand. But for some reason, I have a feeling that as he grows up ( even more than he already has :’) )  and gets a taste for having sexual relations with another person without ties, he might climb my list. However, I’m placing him here for now. Definitely is very serious during sex. Likes to grip your waste really hard. 
seungkwan // “I’m so lucky to have you” - AWE. We all love Seungkwan, but he is not down for the one night stand scene. He can’t make himself do it. He might say he wants to have a one night stand, but will never actually go through with it. He’s definitely waiting for that one person to get intimate with. Also, I think the thought of random people seeing him naked doesn’t sit well with him. But so, so, so, so much praise! He’s so cute in bed.
joshua // “it’s you and me, forever” - Josh wants commitment. Period. He wasn’t dubbed Jisoos Christ for nothing. I love him, but no one night stands for my guy. He’s definitely searching for that emotional connection, and I will even go as far as to say that he has to love you before anything along the lines of sex happens. I don’t think he’ll hold off everything till marriage, though. He knows that you need to have a good physical connection with another person before leaping into life-long commitment. Very sweet in bed though. Vanilla. Sub.
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